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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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5 hours ago, Gigi43 said:

Add me to the list of people who thought Derrick wouldn't finish law school. Good for him. I know not all lawyers roll in the dough- especially at first- but he should have stability for him/Jill/the boys as the TTH house of cards crumbles. 

 

I hope Jill can have a relationship with the younger siblings and show them, boys and girls, at least one person in the home who goes to actual school is a more viable way of making money than hoping to live life on TV and SM ads. 

YES!

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So can anyone catch me up on Jill and Derick. I know she’s distanced from her parents; hasn’t been to the TTH in a few years; wears pants, drinks and goes to therapy; has said fewer kids is better bc you want to pay attention to your kids. What about the kids? All I remember is back on the show, Iz seemed kind of scared of his parents, Derick seemed kind of critical of him even as a 1-2 yr old who didn’t listen. Are they raising their kids more normally? Have they said whether they home school vs sending them to Christian or public school?

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7 minutes ago, cereality said:

So can anyone catch me up on Jill and Derick. I know she’s distanced from her parents; hasn’t been to the TTH in a few years; wears pants, drinks and goes to therapy; has said fewer kids is better bc you want to pay attention to your kids. What about the kids? All I remember is back on the show, Iz seemed kind of scared of his parents, Derick seemed kind of critical of him even as a 1-2 yr old who didn’t listen. Are they raising their kids more normally? Have they said whether they home school vs sending them to Christian or public school?

Izzy seems much happier and goes to public school. Both Jill and Derelict are calmer with both kids. 

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5 minutes ago, cereality said:

So can anyone catch me up on Jill and Derick. I know she’s distanced from her parents; hasn’t been to the TTH in a few years; wears pants, drinks and goes to therapy; has said fewer kids is better bc you want to pay attention to your kids. What about the kids? All I remember is back on the show, Iz seemed kind of scared of his parents, Derick seemed kind of critical of him even as a 1-2 yr old who didn’t listen. Are they raising their kids more normally? Have they said whether they home school vs sending them to Christian or public school?

My opinion is that since Israel was a honeymoon baby, born in the midst of the first Josh scandal, during a very trying time in Jill and Derick's new marriage, they took it out on him, whether they were aware of it or not. A lot of their plans for life as a married couple didn't happen the way they envisioned, and I think that stress was sensed by Izzy. Jill was visibly overwhelmed with all that happened in the first few years of marriage and only now within the last year or two, after making it known that she's going to therapy and hardly sees her Duggar family, has it seemed that they're all lighter and happier. Izzy is in public school and as far as I can tell really likes it. It's been theorized, and I agree with this theory, that Derrick doesn't really prefer small children, so now that Izzy is older and in school, Derick can relate to him better. 

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1 hour ago, MaryAnneSpier said:

I just hope all this work toward even more education leads to him having steady employment. He had a degree and a job for WM and threw it away to be a grifting "missionary". That failed and then he tried to grift more money for a one-year ministry certificate that went nowhere. He's older now, with nearly seven years of marriage under his belt, Jill is (it seems) healing from the shitshow she was brought up in, their boys are older and in school, they've bought a house. Hopefully that all works in favor of Derrick settling down and sticking with it. 

I was going to say something ~ I hope Derick sticks with this, and he doesn’t see something shiny and changes his mind. Again. But I really hope he supports his wife right now. She needs his support now than ever.

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I wonder if any of the Duggars will acknowledge this huge achievement via SM.  I know they are all probably still reeling from this week's revelations (no snark), but this is a really big deal.  It'll be telling either way.

Speaking of, do we know if there were any Duggar birthdays this week that would have been mentioned online, if not for Josh's unholy activities?

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1 hour ago, CouchTater said:

Speaking of, do we know if there were any Duggar birthdays this week that would have been mentioned online, if not for Josh's unholy activities?

No early May Duggar birthdays. The next Duggar/ Duggar in-law birthdays are Jill (May 17), Lauren (May 18), Ben (May 19), and Jackson (May 23).

I do wonder what kind of Mother's Day sm posts we get tomorrow...

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(edited)
1 hour ago, CouchTater said:

I wonder if any of the Duggars will acknowledge this huge achievement via SM.  I know they are all probably still reeling from this week's revelations (no snark), but this is a really big deal.  It'll be telling either way.

 

I hadn't thought about that before.  Any sign of acknowledgement so far?  I remember when my husband graduated engineering there was a ceremony where they got their iron rings (I think this is very specific to Canadian engineers) anyway my mother went to the ceremony with us and was so proud of him.  Honestly I think it almost meant more to her than it did to me!  I am going on a limb here and suggesting even if Michelle hadn't been shattered (theoretically anyway) by the latest Josh scandal, she would not be swelling with pride at Derrick's accomplishment 😔 but perhaps I'm wrong.

Edited by WinnieWinkle
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2 minutes ago, Zella said:

And regardless of who is at fault for the estrangement or anyone's stance on either party, I can't say I'd expect them to congratulate him after he's been making cryptic accusations about them on social media. Also, I seriously doubt he wants congratulations from them. 

It's too bad for the Duggars though. In an alternate reality they would have a tame lawyer on retainer that they wouldn never have to pay!

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(edited)
2 minutes ago, WinnieWinkle said:

It's too bad for the Duggars though. In an alternate reality they would have a tame lawyer on retainer that they wouldn never have to pay!

Yep. If they had played their cards right, they might have saved some money on legal bills! And if Derick is competent, that might have been a basic upgrade on their current local representation. 

Honestly, I don't even know why they hire Story other than him being a fellow fundie. Whenever people are asking for lawyer recommendations locally, like on online groups, I have never once heard anyone recommend him, and the law student who followed the proceedings on Reddit said that, though the St. Louis guy was obviously good, Story had a terrible presence. 

Edited by Zella
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21 hours ago, MaryAnneSpier said:

I just hope all this work toward even more education leads to him having steady employment. He had a degree and a job for WM and threw it away to be a grifting "missionary". That failed and then he tried to grift more money for a one-year ministry certificate that went nowhere. He's older now, with nearly seven years of marriage under his belt, Jill is (it seems) healing from the shitshow she was brought up in, their boys are older and in school, they've bought a house. Hopefully that all works in favor of Derrick settling down and sticking with it. 

Has Derick ever said that he quit the job at Walmart? They have layoffs just like any other company and under LIFO he would have been a prime candidate to let go. I have a distant young relative who was laid off from Walmart HQ because they bought a subsidiary to handle their internet business. 

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Derrick doesn’t sit the bar until July, around the same time Josh goes to trial. He couldn’t have helped with Josh’s defense anyway since he won’t have passed the bar by then. 

I doubt he would  (if on good terms with the family) have had any time to help at all since he would be studying for the bar exam. 

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3 minutes ago, Dehumidifier said:

Has Derick ever said that he quit the job at Walmart? They have layoffs just like any other company and under LIFO he would have been a prime candidate to let go. I have a distant young relative who was laid off from Walmart HQ because they bought a subsidiary to handle their internet business. 

They do have periodic layoffs, but I don't believe he was let go during one of them. My understanding was he quit to go to Danger America, not that he was laid off. 

1 minute ago, Teriacky said:

Derrick doesn’t sit the bar until July, around the same time Josh goes to trial. He couldn’t have helped with Josh’s defense anyway since he won’t have passed the bar by then. 

I doubt he would  (if on good terms with the family) have had any time to help at all since he would be studying for the bar exam. 

Oh I agree. I was just talking more in general about legal stuff for the family, not a particularly realistic timeline. 

Edited by Zella
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4 minutes ago, Dehumidifier said:

Has Derick ever said that he quit the job at Walmart? They have layoffs just like any other company and under LIFO he would have been a prime candidate to let go. I have a distant young relative who was laid off from Walmart HQ because they bought a subsidiary to handle their internet business. 

This was the reporting at the time (granted not the best source but they got WM to respond). No mention of layoffs.

https://radaronline.com/exclusives/2015/06/derick-dillard-quits-walmart-job-company-speaks-out/

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27 minutes ago, Zella said:

Yep. If they had played their cards right, they might have saved some money on legal bills! And if Derick is competent, that might have been a basic upgrade on their current local representation. 

Honestly, I don't even know why they hire Story other than him being a fellow fundie. Whenever people are asking for lawyer recommendations locally, like on online groups, I have never once heard anyone recommend him, and the law student who followed the proceedings on Reddit said that, though the St. Louis guy was obviously good, Story had a terrible presence. 

Honestly, I wonder what Story knows. Is he in on the alleged scams along with Jim Bob and Mullet? Are they paying him under the table so he doesn't have to declare X amount of income? 

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1 minute ago, Dehumidifier said:

If that is true it was a dumb move after such a short time of employment.

Agreed. I do wonder if it was a snap decision made in the wake of the molestations being made public or if he had already planned to leave and perhaps moved up the timing. 

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1 minute ago, Zella said:

Agreed. I do wonder if it was a snap decision made in the wake of the molestations being made public or if he had already planned to leave and perhaps moved up the timing. 

He may have found that he didn't really liked working in accounting. An actual job is different than school. School is new things all the time. Work tends to be the same thing over and over (every month in accounting.)

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1 minute ago, Dehumidifier said:

He may have found that he didn't really liked working in accounting. An actual job is different than school. School is new things all the time. Work tends to be the same thing over and over (every month in accounting.)

Agree, book learning and the real world are vastly different.

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 I’m glad he made it through. I will actually be happy for them if he sticks with the job. I will be ecstatic if he actually picks an admirable cause that isn’t abortion or a springboard into politics. Best of luck.

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3 minutes ago, Dehumidifier said:

He may have found that he didn't really liked working in accounting. An actual job is different than school. School is new things all the time. Work tends to be the same thing over and over (every month in accounting.)

I know it's an office job as opposed to working on the floor - but I've had several young relatives work at Walmart and have a 'come to jesus' moment about the value of getting a degree.

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3 hours ago, CouchTater said:

I don't think I share ANYthing in common with these people, but gosh darn it, I'm smiling for them today.  They look so happy in the "getting ready for graduation" picture.  And they look good.

I'm happy for them today and hope that other Duggars are inspired by Derek's (and by extension, Jill's) accomplishments!

I am too! I love Jill's dress! 

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29 minutes ago, Dehumidifier said:

Has Derick ever said that he quit the job at Walmart? They have layoffs just like any other company and under LIFO he would have been a prime candidate to let go. I have a distant young relative who was laid off from Walmart HQ because they bought a subsidiary to handle their internet business. 

Derick has always been vague and circumspect about everything. If he was fired, he'll never admit that publically.

That was a pretty big year: his mother's cancer, getting married, starting a new job, and having a baby. I think he was under enormous pressure.

He took a LOT of time off that year -- because of his mother, his wedding, the baby, and filming. I think it's entirely possible that WalMart didn't think he would be a good fit and let him go. He might also have gotten an unflattering performance review and have seen the writing on the wall, and chose to leave.

He was also getting pressure from Jill who hated being home alone, and really expected him to be available to her 24/7 just like her daddy. I think he was also under pressure from JB who wanted him to be available for filming and really dislike having a SIL working outside of Duggar Enterprises and outside of his "umbrella of authority."

I think this is where Derick's vague complaint about JB meddling in his career comes from. Derick assumed that he would choose his own career path (like a normal person in the 21st century), and it didn't even cross JB's mind that he would not control his SIL's life the way he controlled his own children.

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14 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

 I’m glad he made it through. I will actually be happy for them if he sticks with the job. I will be ecstatic if he actually picks an admirable cause that isn’t abortion or a springboard into politics. Best of luck.

Back when they were in DA, and when they were back in AR and he was in that weird program, a number of people posted on this board that "someone should sit Derick down and have a talk with him." I think it's pretty clear that someone actually did.

I also think that someone actually convinced him that he could "serve the Lord" doing something other than missionary work. If he actually does end up doing some type of social justice work, I'll be deeply impressed. If he's come so far that he actually equates "serving the Lord" with doing something good to help people, I'll be ready to congratulate him.

I think it's far more likely, though, that he'll go to work in the legal arm of some hate group working to undermine women's rights, or LGBTQ rights under the guise of "protecting" people from making their own decisions.

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22 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

Derick has always been vague and circumspect about everything. If he was fired, he'll never admit that publically.

I remember him saying it was his choice and that he had shared with his manager his intent was always to become a missionary. I remember thinking how stupid that was, because you never tell your boss you’re thinking of leaving your job. So it is still possible he was fired or that he quit.

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(edited)
12 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

I think it's far more likely, though, that he'll go to work in the legal arm of some hate group working to undermine women's rights, or LGBTQ rights under the guise of "protecting" people from making their own decisions.

I agree. That's why I've been wary when he uses the term "social justice." 

Edited by emmawoodhouse
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I’m impressed with the progress that both Jill and Derrick have made in their lives. I’m cheering them on. But I won’t become a true believer in Derrick until he gets a job and keeps it. 

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This was a response by Jill, answering  a question at the beginning of law school: (plans can change, though)

 

“It’s going well! He’s in full swing with exams, briefs, oral arguments, and summer job applications. He’s hoping to practice some kind of public interest law (voice for the voiceless).”

 

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1 hour ago, hathorlive said:

I'm waiting for the Christmas ten years down the road where the kids exchange "that really important moment of my life (wedding, book tour, engagement, baby) that was overshadowed by Josh scandal 1, 2, or 3.   Now that builds family memories (and resentment).

I'm happy for these two and I don't know why.  I did a year of law school.  It's hard.  I can't imagine doing it with a family.  I wish the Dillards much success and happiness in life.   

My 2 years of grad school (not law) were some of the hardest of my life. I feel kind of teary seeing the picture of Derrick and Jill and I don’t even know them. And I generally REALLY don’t care what happens to any Duggar. 

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Not that I'm the authority on fashion but I wasn't feeling the dress Jill showed she tried on in Amy's store. The graduation dress however is really nice. Derick looked good too. Jeremy should take notes.

 

Derick's post to his mom/Jill was really nice. Credit where it's due. I still think he was shit stir-y last week but it does seem he's made strides in other areas. I wish him luck passing the bar.

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