Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Sofa Sloth]

2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Jessa's latest FU INTERWEBZ!!11 post.

Yes, the message is good, until she invokes Possum Head at the very end.

Why am I not surprised Jessa’s keen to get child labour to do the housework. Jana must have had the day off 😆 

[lulu69]

At first I was surprised Jessa gave a shout out to her own mom but then I realized it's probably critical that the Dug kidults keep believing their mom was great and the best mom ever. To think otherwise would sent the whole mental house of cards tumbling down. It's as if the brain is acting in self preservation by lying to itself.

Ok, no more deep stuff. It's back to the shallow end of the pool for me.

[awaken]

4 hours ago, cmr2014 said:

There's absolutely nothing wrong with this EXCEPT that she's lecturing us. If she had phrased this as something she was learning as a mother instead of a lesson for her fans it would have been fine.

Exactly. I don’t need to be taught how to parent by jessa. She needs to sit down and listen to the rest of us who’ve made it through the teen years with multiple kids, full time jobs, disabilities, lean times, marital issues, and no outside support or tv money. Then let’s hear from her. 

[QuinnInND]

I agree with what she said, but don't lecture. I am impressed that a boy is doing wimmins work. My son loves vacuuming. He wants to do it every day. And so I let him.  🤣

[xtwheeler]

On 6/30/2019 at 9:45 PM, Barb23 said:

@doodlebug & @Absolom Thanks for the info.

I read a home birth story that sadly ended up with the newborn dying because of a mixup with the Group B strep results. I don't remember exactly what happened except the mom had the test done but the positive results didn't either get to her midwife or for some reason the midwife got the results but the mom wasn't treated.  It was an uneventful birth & the couple put the baby down to sleep after the midwife left. Short time later they checked on the baby & realized she wasn't breathing.  They called 911 but there was nothing they could do, the baby had already died.  Somehow they traced it back to the mom not being treated for the infection. So sad considering how simple it is to treat the mom.

These Duggar gals sure like taking unnecessary chances. Do they even know this is a thing they should be tested for?  I guess I'm mainly referring to Jessa since she's the one whose prenatal care seems to be in question. 

Barb23, I think this is the story you're referring to: https://www.groupbstrepinternational.org/wren-jones.html Wren's story has always stuck with me. 

The thing about home birth is they're low risk until they suddenly aren't in an instant. In that instant, you need to have access to professionals. These idiots are tempting fate in the worst possible way. 

[Temperance]

On 7/6/2019 at 4:13 PM, GeeGolly said:

She does look good. She may be only in her 60s. I don't think Ben's mom is even 45 yet.

You're right. Guinn will be forty-five in a few days (according to fundiewiki).  

[madpsych78]

12 hours ago, awaken said:

Exactly. I don’t need to be taught how to parent by jessa. She needs to sit down and listen to the rest of us who’ve made it through the teen years with multiple kids, full time jobs, disabilities, lean times, marital issues, and no outside support or tv money. Then let’s hear from her. 

Then instead of saying that explicitly to Jessa, perhaps parents should flood her IG with their own stories of parenting their children. Then Jessa would be exposed to different experiences.

[Barb23]

14 hours ago, xtwheeler said:

Barb23, I think this is the story you're referring to: https://www.groupbstrepinternational.org/wren-jones.html Wren's story has always stuck with me. 

The thing about home birth is they're low risk until they suddenly aren't in an instant. In that instant, you need to have access to professionals. These idiots are tempting fate in the worst possible way. 

Yes, that is the story I was referring to.  It's been years since I've read it & has stuck with me too.  How sad the dad recorded the baby with distressed breathing.  

Like you said, things can happen in an instant. Just because the ambulance can come doesn't mean they can save the day & there will be a happy ending. 

I have had many an ambulance ride with my heart problems & have all the respect in the world for the EMTs.  But they aren't OBs,  pediatricians or neonatologists that can deal with birthing  problems in an instant like if they were at a hospital. 

Edited July 10, 2019 by Barb23

[Sew Sumi]

5 hours ago, madpsych78 said:

Then instead of saying that explicitly to Jessa, perhaps parents should flood her IG with their own stories of parenting their children. Then Jessa would be exposed to different experiences.

She'd probably feel that SHE was being lectured to and ban you. That's how Blessa rolls.

[Snow Fairy]

https://okmagazine.com/photos/counting-on-jessa-duggar-clapback-mommy-shamers-newborn-uses-pacifier-instagram/

Can't read the article from my county, and I wanted to know what happened

[lookeyloo]

2 hours ago, Snow Fairy said:

https://okmagazine.com/photos/counting-on-jessa-duggar-clapback-mommy-shamers-newborn-uses-pacifier-instagram/

Can't read the article from my county, and I wanted to know what happened

Oh no!  She uses a pacifier?  That's what they criticize her for?  

[heckkitty]

The “clapback” is literally nothing. She talks about why she lets Ivy have a pacifier, a few people criticize her for that or for the fact that the one she has has a stuffed animal attached to it (I did not know that was a thing), which is barely a criticism, end of story.   There’s no response from her at all, so no “clapback”. That article is nothing but clickbait.

[Ohiopirate02]

20 minutes ago, heckkitty said:

The “clapback” is literally nothing. She talks about why she lets Ivy have a pacifier, a few people criticize her for that or for the fact that the one she has has a stuffed animal attached to it (I did not know that was a thing), which is barely a criticism, end of story.   There’s no response from her at all, so no “clapback”. That article is nothing but clickbait.

Those pacifiers are designed for newborns up to 6 months.  My sister had them for my nephew and I see a lot of babies with them.  Honestly,  if I was a celebrity of any sort,  I would never post pictures of my kids because no matter what you do,  you are doing it wrong. I will never understand why some women feel the need to police other women's parenting on the internet.

[Suzn]

33 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Those pacifiers are designed for newborns up to 6 months.  My sister had them for my nephew and I see a lot of babies with them.  Honestly,  if I was a celebrity of any sort,  I would never post pictures of my kids because no matter what you do,  you are doing it wrong. I will never understand why some women feel the need to police other women's parenting on the internet.

Everybody is an expert!  The reality is that there is a wide range of behaviors/conditions that will successfully raise a child and by the same token, a person can do everything "right" and something can go haywire and off the track.  There are certainly egregiously dangerous, neglectful, and abusive things parents do that deserve condemnation, but otherwise people need to stop monitoring every little child care activity of others.  It would help to take a longer view and remember that advice from the actual experts is always changing.

[lascuba]

6 hours ago, Snow Fairy said:

https://okmagazine.com/photos/counting-on-jessa-duggar-clapback-mommy-shamers-newborn-uses-pacifier-instagram/

Can't read the article from my county, and I wanted to know what happened

Absolutely nothing except the magazine being ridiculous. They're basically saying that Jessa stating she only gives Ivy a pacifier for car rides is a preemptive "clapback".* The "criticisms" they quote aren't much of anything, either. One comment said that she also only ever gives pacifiers for car rides as well, and another offered mildly stated warning that pacifiers with stuffed animals attached can be bad for teeth.

*To be fair, considering how ridiculous the natural woo crowd gets over stuff like this, it's entirely possible that Jessa gave that explanation in an attempt to prevent bullshit comments  about the evils of pacifiers. But neither her captions nor the comments were at all rude.

[louannems]

3 hours ago, heckkitty said:

The “clapback” is literally nothing. She talks about why she lets Ivy have a pacifier, a few people criticize her for that or for the fact that the one she has has a stuffed animal attached to it (I did not know that was a thing), which is barely a criticism, end of story.   There’s no response from her at all, so no “clapback”. That article is nothing but clickbait.

Plus that site was trying to crash my tablet, what with all those pop-ups.  I couldn't close those fast enough!

[Picture It. Sicily]

Those "stuffed" animals are lighter than a beanie baby. I doubt it will hurt her teeth (that she doesn't even have yet).

[QuinnInND]

On 7/11/2019 at 12:02 PM, Picture It. Sicily said:

Those "stuffed" animals are lighter than a beanie baby. I doubt it will hurt her teeth (that she doesn't even have yet).

My twins had those. The animals are very light. Their teeth are fine. 

[GeeGolly]

Back in the day celebrity journalists needed to actually speak to folks in real life, bring along a photographer and make connections within the culture. It seems now they only need to follow a celebrity's SM accounts and then read some snark sites. 

Seeing as us posters here have the Duggars pretty much surrounded, we should be getting some kickbacks. At least enough to stock the Prayer Closet.

[Jynnan tonnix]

7 hours ago, QuinnInND said:

My twins had those. The animals are very light. Their teeth are fine. 

I don't know about those animal pacifiers, but both my boys were very attached to their normal pacifiers way past the age that we should have started weaning them off, and the younger one's teeth in particular were beginning to come in with a pretty severe overbite before we were finally able to rid him of the pacifier for good. Within a couple of months, the overbite had completely vanished, so I doubt that the animal pacifiers would do any lasting damage either.

[Farmfam]

The word “clapback” makes me stabby. 

[Portia]

1 hour ago, Farmfam said:

The word “clapback” makes me stabby. 

That's funny...I feel the same way about "makes me stabby." 😉

[3 is enough]

So the child is less than two months old and people are giving Jessa a hard time for using a pacifier?  That's insane.  

[Heathen]

14 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

So the child is less than two months old and people are giving Jessa a hard time for using a pacifier?  That's insane.  

If the Duggars/adjacents don't post, they're hiding something. If they do post, they're oversharing/get blasted by petty, frequently ignorant criticisms. Especially Jessa Seewald, Jill Dullard, and Jeremy Vuolo. 

[Ohiopirate02]

2 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

So the child is less than two months old and people are giving Jessa a hard time for using a pacifier?  That's insane.  

There was a celebrity a week or two ago that caught grief for getting her daughter's ears pierced as a baby because its apparently child abuse.  This is something done in pediatricians offices nowadays and not just at claire's or piercing pagodas.  If you post pictures of your kids online like jessa, you have to prepare for some sort of backlash.  There is no need to mommy shame unless it's an antivaxxer.

[DangerousMinds]

2 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

So the child is less than two months old and people are giving Jessa a hard time for using a pacifier?  That's insane.  

When you share these details with millions of literal strangers, you’re going to get all kinds of opinions. She chooses this.

[leighdear]

If the animal is lightweight enough and shifts, can't it block the baby's nose and obstruct their breathing since the rubber part is already in their mouth? 

Regular pacifiers don't pose that problem. 

I guess as long as Jessa doesn't hit any bumps with the baby in the car, it's fine. 

[zenme]

6 minutes ago, leighdear said:

If the animal is lightweight enough and shifts, can't it block the baby's nose and obstruct their breathing since the rubber part is already in their mouth? 

Regular pacifiers don't pose that problem. 

I guess as long as Jessa doesn't hit any bumps with the baby in the car, it's fine. 

As a grandmother of a baby that used one of those pacifiers, those particular pacifiers are harmless. It can't block breathing, and it's extremely lightweight.  

[leighdear]

8 minutes ago, zenme said:

As a grandmother of a baby that used one of those pacifiers, those particular pacifiers are harmless. It can't block breathing, and it's extremely lightweight.  

Good to know.  I haven't had one that age for a long time, so the newest baby trends pass me right by!  

[zenme]

1 minute ago, leighdear said:

Good to know.  I haven't had one that age for a long time, so the newest baby trends pass me right by!  

Totally get it! Get this: they have a machine that's like a Keurig for baby formula! Timesaver and perfect temp! 

[leighdear]

2 minutes ago, zenme said:

Totally get it! Get this: they have a machine that's like a Keurig for baby formula! Timesaver and perfect temp! 

Now that is pretty damn genius!  🙂

[awaken]

Chiming in as an infant feeding specialist- yes, the wub-a-nub pacifier with the stuffed animal is fine, if used judiciously of course!  Which is true for any piece of baby equipment. 

[Ijustwantsomechips]

1 hour ago, zenme said:

Totally get it! Get this: they have a machine that's like a Keurig for baby formula! Timesaver and perfect temp! 

Yes the Baby Brezza! I’ve already told my mom and sister that’s the one gift I want for my first baby. 

OT: I thought the pacifier comments were ridiculous, but Jessa chooses to live her live on SM, and it’s a packaged deal.

[lascuba]

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

When you share these details with millions of literal strangers, you’re going to get all kinds of opinions. She chooses this.

Yes, that is absolutely true, but that doesn't change the fact that the people bitching about pacifiers are batshit. 

This is true for social media in general, I guess. Yes, yes, if you don't want that type and scale of attention, don't put your life out there like that, but that doesn't mean that the people giving that kind of attention aren't wrong. I'm not saying this in sympathy for "influencers,"  at all. I really don't care if fundies are hounded off the internet forever, but I hate when the shit thrown at them is so stupid and asinine that I have to side with them.  

[kokapetl]

On 7/13/2019 at 6:04 PM, GeeGolly said:

Back in the day celebrity journalists needed to actually speak to folks in real life, bring along a photographer and make connections within the culture. It seems now they only need to follow a celebrity's SM accounts and then read some snark sites. 

Seeing as us posters here have the Duggars pretty much surrounded, we should be getting some kickbacks. At least enough to stock the Prayer Closet.

People magazine works like that, they don’t make shit up. Closer magazine won’t be reporting on the Duggars until at least 2040. Everyone else seems to just make shit up. 

[Heathen]

14 hours ago, kokapetl said:

People magazine works like that, they don’t make shit up. Closer magazine won’t be reporting on the Duggars until at least 2040. Everyone else seems to just make shit up. 

People may not blatantly print fiction, but its writers certainly and absolutely slant in favor of the celebrity du jour. They've done it since at least the 1980s. 

[Gemma Violet]

Encouraging Spurge to vacuum is being done for one reason and one reason only:   Jessa's two oldest children aren't girls, so the boys will become her maids and be in charge of house cleaning.  Maybe Ivy will do all the cooking when she turns seven.

[Tabbygirl521]

35 minutes ago, Gemma Violet said:

Encouraging Spurge to vacuum is being done for one reason and one reason only:   Jessa's two oldest children aren't girls, so the boys will become her maids and be in charge of house cleaning.  Maybe Ivy will do all the cooking when she turns seven.

I don’t know. Ben irons. Maybe they actually don’t adhere to gender roles in regard to housework. 

[Zella]

14 minutes ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I don’t know. Ben irons. Maybe they actually don’t adhere to gender roles in regard to housework. 

I don't like Jessa for a lot of reasons, but I have to give her credit that she seems much less uptight about this kind of stuff than most of the rest of the family, and I'm glad. 

On a snarkier note, considering she was the one with the nasty pile of dirty diapers in her house, Ben may have realized anybody but Jessa cleaning is an upgrade. . . .

[DangerousMinds]

4 minutes ago, Zella said:

I don't like Jessa for a lot of reasons, but I have to give her credit that she seems much less uptight about this kind of stuff than most of the rest of the family, and I'm glad. 

On a snarkier note, considering she was the one with the nasty pile of dirty diapers in her house, Ben may have realized anybody but Jessa cleaning is an upgrade. . . .

They had a pile of dirty diapers, and he didn’t clean them up either.

[Zella]

1 minute ago, DangerousMinds said:

They had a pile of dirty diapers, and he didn’t clean them up either.

Well, that is true! 😂

Maybe poor Spurgeon and Henry took matters into their own hands!

[McManda]

7 hours ago, Gemma Violet said:

Encouraging Spurge to vacuum is being done for one reason and one reason only: 

Small kids love vacuums. (In my limited experience.) It's weird, but all the small kids in my life went through a phase where the vacuum or the broom was the best toy ever. There a decent chance he chose it himself and was actually having fun. 

[GeeGolly]

6 hours ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I don’t know. Ben irons. Maybe they actually don’t adhere to gender roles in regard to housework. 

This may be true. If it is, it's probably because Jessa is the only female in the house.

But I'm guessing Jessa puts out a lot of photos to defend and/or counter her Gothard upbringing.

[Tikichick]

On 6/26/2019 at 3:19 PM, jcbrown said:

Not sure why but I watched this again this morning. Why did Ben have to lean over the arm/back of the couch rather than sitting next to Jessa? Did Jill steal that seat in case she got the chance to use any of her medical thingys?

I guess that would explain Ben's stress.

[awaken]

21 hours ago, Zella said:

Well, that is true! 😂

Maybe poor Spurgeon and Henry took matters into their own hands!

Lol, that’s a gross image!  

[cmr2014]

23 hours ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I don’t know. Ben irons. Maybe they actually don’t adhere to gender roles in regard to housework. 

While I think their gender roles aren't as rigid as some people in their cult, I don't think Ben is doing a lot of housework any more than Jessa is working outside the house. Ben irons because he wants his clothes to look decent and Jessa is never going to do it. He helps in the kitchen because he would like food that is not cream soup based.

I personally don't think that Jessa is a significantly better homemaker than Jill, but I do think she's smarter about her SM presence. Jessa's house is filthy and she has the same ambivalence to clean sheets that Jill does. 

While I don't think Ben is as big a douche as Derick (that's not saying much, either), he's still a jerk. He's been silent on SM for years -- but he and Jessa were flaming assholes on SM when they were first married.

Jessa and Ben are better looking than Jill and Derick, and their kids are better looking. Jessa takes better photos than Jill, and she actually edits her posts and chooses nice photos. Whether we acknowledge it or not, we are hard-wired to prefer attractive people.

Jill comes across as desperately needy and clingy and Jessa doesn't, but I think that Jessa is just as damaged as Jill. In my opinion, any perception that their marriage is egalitarian (or particularly happy) is an illusion.

[Ijustwantsomechips]

11 hours ago, cmr2014 said:

While I think their gender roles aren't as rigid as some people in their cult, I don't think Ben is doing a lot of housework any more than Jessa is working outside the house. Ben irons because he wants his clothes to look decent and Jessa is never going to do it. He helps in the kitchen because he would like food that is not cream soup based.

I personally don't think that Jessa is a significantly better homemaker than Jill, but I do think she's smarter about her SM presence. Jessa's house is filthy and she has the same ambivalence to clean sheets that Jill does. 

While I don't think Ben is as big a douche as Derick (that's not saying much, either), he's still a jerk. He's been silent on SM for years -- but he and Jessa were flaming assholes on SM when they were first married.

Jessa and Ben are better looking than Jill and Derick, and their kids are better looking. Jessa takes better photos than Jill, and she actually edits her posts and chooses nice photos. Whether we acknowledge it or not, we are hard-wired to prefer attractive people.

Jill comes across as desperately needy and clingy and Jessa doesn't, but I think that Jessa is just as damaged as Jill. In my opinion, any perception that their marriage is egalitarian (or particularly happy) is an illusion.

Damn right!  

[Dmarie019]

On 7/16/2019 at 6:28 AM, McManda said:

Small kids love vacuums. (In my limited experience.) It's weird, but all the small kids in my life went through a phase where the vacuum or the broom was the best toy ever. There a decent chance he chose it himself and was actually having fun. 

Yep, both of my oldest nephews were obsessed with the vacuum when they were about that same age. I think at least one of them got a kid vacuum for christmas one year. I recall my friend posting about her getting a new vacuum for xmas and her son getting a mini one as well.  It was cute.

[GeeGolly]

Hmm, radio silence from the Seewald camp.

[galaxychaser]

They are busy doing... nothing.