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S15.E08: Can I Light You Up?


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39 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

She's 42. It won't be so easy to get preg again. Unless she's fertile myrtle. 

Nah it doesn’t work that way remember?  According to their faith it’s God’s will and the willingness of another baby spirit that longs to be Brown Baby 19.... 

 

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42 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

If Mr. Right comes along after the show is over, Meri will be over, too. 

 

You’re exactly right. No reason to leave until the status quo changes. Meri and Kody have been on the outs for 5+ years, what’s another year doing the same thing? But as soon as someone comes along she wants to date, then she’ll be gone. 

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2 hours ago, Cetacean said:

To what does the episode title refer?  I can't stomach watching or listening so am just here for the snark.  What's "lighting up" all about?

 

2 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Perhaps it’s from the use of the word, rekindling?

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2 hours ago, NoWhammies said:

I suspect it refers to the fact that, as they recorded one another on their nonniversary, they had their phone flashlights on as it got dark outside.

 

Meri was trying to flirt with Kody on their picnic at the rest stop ... she turned the camera light on and said "can I light you up?" .... or something pretty similar.

 

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57 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Let's be real. Meri is hanging on for the TV exposure so she can continue to collect the paycheck. If Mr. Right comes along after the show is over, she will be over, too. 

She's 42. It won't be so easy to get preg again. Unless she's fertile myrtle. 

Meri is using this show to more blatantly promoting her outside businesses - Rice Krispy treats aren't some delicacy - especially 30 at a time - and she has sold some the actual LulaRoe clothing she's worn on the show.  (Kody guessed that she gave him 18, as if he'd distribute one to each child.) 

Robyn is desperate to steal back centerstage for at least an entire season.  She's been the worst, most disingenuous about her concern for her sister wives.  Every episode this season, she has made her potential pregnancy an issue, when nobody else seems to care.  For example, at the Dargers, she had to protest loudly that Kody must have been openly discussing her fertility, because she thinks that she's the only wife of child-bearing age.  And, last week, she mocked her sister wives while declaring she is so young with plenty of time ahead.  She'd have a child just to force everyone into one house where they'd have to be her nursemaids.

I hope Mr. Right does come along for Meri so that TLC drops this show for a spin-off.  I'll hate-watch it for the freakshow characters.  And, I and Google articles about Kody and Robyn's bankruptcies, evictions, and attempts to be arrested in Utah for speeding while professing to be polygamous.  

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6 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

All true.  I don't think he is doing a whole lot better with his female children either.  The scene where he is sitting with his arm around Savannah was very uncomfortable.  He looked like he knew he blew it with is kids and was faking it, she looked like she was stiff as a board and his boys want him to go away.  I want to hear what they say wihtout the cameras there!

Kody is so insecure and jealous of his sons that he was grabbing Savannah to make Gabe jealous or to show Gabe how he's literally such a hands-on, loving father.  And for all their COVID concern, Janelle and her children sat in their interior living room with Kody.  When he's not around and they're alone, they social distance on the outside patio.

I don't remember what exactly Gabe said in the backyard scenes, but I believe he twice told Janelle flat-out that he didn't care if Kody visited.  

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We all know Kody is the main d-bag on this show, but does anybody else think that Gabe is a little prick?

 He could care less about taking precautions, and says it right to his morbidly obese high-risk mother’s face.

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13 minutes ago, chuckity said:

I would totally watch a show with Meri, Christine & Janelle moving into a big house together (suck it Kody) and re-joining single life.

Possible show titles:

Sister Wives:  Starting Over

Sister Wives:  Moving On

Sister Wives:  Love should be subtracted

Sister Wives:  Kody and Robyn are dead to us

YES!  TLC, are you listening?  

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4 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Good heavens, then he really is the most clueless dorkwaffle to ever be on television, because every one of us can see her playing him from the comforts of our living room couches all across the USA, Europe, Australia, etc.

 

If Robyn has him full time, then she has no one gazing with longing at her skinny, young, Kody-having self with unrestrained jealousy.  She WANTS to be the object of envy amongst her sister wives.  If they all bail and she's stuck with Kody, it would be the perfect just dessert for both of them...two raging narcissists, stuck together for eternity.  I would love it if this were the outcome for this family.

 

Good point!  I didn't even register that - if Kody is so terrified of catching Covid from his good-for-nothing bonus sons, why on Earth were they all crammed together in Janelle's musty living room?  I think I was busy trying to figure out why Gabe was smushed right up against Janelle in one big chair.  It was like he was shielding himself from Kody by clinging to his mother.  Man, these kids are going to need so much therapy.

That house looks like it smells like cat pee and sadness.  Messy, possibly boogers on things, stinky socks.  Just ew.  Someone mentioned that meal last week.  Woah that was some greyish lumpy shit.  Not one thing of color on that table.  And she went so far as to show us she grows stuff.   Reality show my hieny.

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(edited)

Kootie is beyond a pathetic excuse for a man, let alone a "husband."  He created this fucking mess, and refuses to acknowledge his responsibility for it.

Did anyone else think it odd that Christine's bed appears to be up against a window?

ETA:  Kootie AND Meri saying they don't say cruel things to others?  What a couple of liars.  They are both guilty of doing that!

Edited by xwordfanatik
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TweetQuote from Kodouche: “This isn’t a fight or situation that people should take sides or even give opinions. It is our problem and we will work it out as we should. This happens in marriage, so what you think of me is none of my business.”

There is nothing to work out. There is no marriage. They already got divorced, they don't live together, and their only child together is grown. They are two ships passing in the daylight when a camera is around. They're not together. For Meri's sake, I hope this is staged for the show and that she's not really this needy and pathetic. She does seem to have made a life apart from the family unit, and she should concentrate on that. I'm super curious about whether their finances are still intertwined at all, like joint accounts or properties. 

Also, Kody is an asshole.

 

 

 

 

 

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3 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

ody fumbling and calling their anniversary Meri's anniversary before correcting himself and saying 'our anniversary.' Why even celebrate a marriage that ain't a marriage?

Meri needs to find some pride. That was painful to watch. 

 

Short answer: they're celebrating the marriage that isn't a marriage because the producers were not interesting in airing nothing but Kody/Robyn content, which is likely all Kody had been submitting. So he had an assignment to shoot with Meri.

Long answer: Painful but fascinating. Real in a way this show seldom is, and yet I also have the suspicion that we're watching is not a sincere interaction but them each trying to position the other to their own advantage. Her attitude is so different in the talking heads vs this "date" that I think the talking heads where she's dismissive of any kind of ongoing personal relationship with Kody/the others is the "rill dill."

What I think we were watching is Kody thinking he was putting Meri's shortcomings as a wife on display, which she was countering by parrying each "you don't want to be here" with "honey, I want to be here so much, why don't you love me?" The same vibe as when she smirked about not having relayed the message about Mariah's leaving was all over this. He was surprised at missing Mariah, but couldn't blame Meri on camera because the elephant in the room was that if he were speaking to Mariah, SHE would have told him but obviously he hadn't bothered to do that either. 

Razor's edge between flirting and mocking.  He doesn't realize that the "this marriage is broken down and neither of us is trying" position he adopted is contradicted when she insists she wants it in front of the camera. And when he does realize it, he's too slow to adapt. And then we get the venting about ALL his relationships, because they've all basically reached this level.

Meri and Kody are united in one thing - they each want to emerge from this fiasco with the other taking the blame in the public eye.

When Christine served notice in no uncertain terms that she will NEVER live together with the others that was a public declaration to Kody that she rejects his "authority" (which to them is spiritual as well as cultural).  That was the final bell tolling on that relationship.

Janelle remains in love with Kody and will continue to be his video game/hang out buddy when he wants to escape the young children/other wives.  

Robyn's clearly missing the freedom of multiple nights a week alone. Unfortunately she's got another 10-15 years of this nonsense until she can get out.

 

 

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4 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

The only interesting part of this show was Meri and Kody. Kody was just utterly brutal during that segment and so much stuff came to light. They haven't been out on a date since their 29th anniversary. He doesn't love her, doesn't have any romantic feelings for her. They don't have sex because that is for married people who are in love and romantic.  He thinks she is cruel. Kody is pretty much a brick wall with her and makes it his job to let her know in a myriad of ways that: "We are never, ever, ever getting back together" but wants to be courted?!?! 

One of the most telling moments was Kody fumbling and calling their anniversary Meri's anniversary before correcting himself and saying 'our anniversary.' Why even celebrate a marriage that ain't a marriage?

Meri needs to find some pride. That was painful to watch. 

Really, was anyone in any doubt that the miserable wife Kody is alluding to is Christine?

No surprise that Janelle doesn't make her bed and cooks barely edible meals - who can forget the grayish plates of slop from last week.  I've long held the belief that Janelle chose the plyg life mainly because she is lazy. Part time husband suits her since she doesn't have to put much, if any effort, into taking care of him and seeing to his needs on a full time basis. 1 to 2 nights a week is more than enough, maybe even too much. Other women provide child care and child rearing services and she can get out of the house to 'work'.  PLUS, Older kids raise the smaller ones and do chores.  She benefitted the most from one house living, which is why she is a big proponent of it. Meanwhile, basement wife Christine, got the worst end of the stick and refuses to ever live that way again. 

No,I thought he was talking about Meri! She is miserable ALL the time! Christine just does not want to live with all these other women!

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44 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Good point!  I didn't even register that - if Kody is so terrified of catching Covid from his good-for-nothing bonus sons, why on Earth were they all crammed together in Janelle's musty living room?  I think I was busy trying to figure out why Gabe was smushed right up against Janelle in one big chair.  It was like he was shielding himself from Kody by clinging to his mother.  Man, these kids are going to need so much therapy.

I thought they were in the living room or den in order to watch the graduation exercises at the Air Force Academy.  I have toured  it and the Naval Academy, and I was really impressed with both.

 

1 hour ago, LilyDutch said:
2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

She's 42. It won't be so easy to get preg again. Unless she's fertile myrtle. 

Nah it doesn’t work that way remember?  According to their faith it’s God’s will and the willingness of another baby spirit that longs to be Brown Baby 19.... 

That's about the same age that Meri was when there was the plot line about her considering IVF.  Maybe there will be talk of Mindy being a surrogate if needed.    So they are using old plots now.  I suspect this will make Christine jealous and she will start looking for someone online and we can have another catfishing plot as well.  Rinse, and repeat !!

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(edited)

"I don't actually want to do anything; I just like to complain."

Finally, a worthy epitaph for Kody's tombstone.

 

So...Kody wants Meri to "court" him? He doesn't enjoy being courted by Meri, and in fact seems physically repelled by her, and he admits he's uncomfortable when she DOES attempt to flirt with him, but...the death of their marriage and its subsequent lack of resurrection is all her fault?

Basically he wants her to keep throwing herself at him so he can reject her over and over again. That's just cruel.

Edited by the-grey-lady
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1 hour ago, Natalie68 said:

He looked like he knew he blew it with is kids 

He was very weird entering Janelle's house, repeating how anxious he was, or something like that. Not the usual cocky asshole we love to loathe. 

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I wonder if Robyn told Kody to finally put his foot down on his and Meri's relationship on camera. It was like Kody was saying in different ways how he didn't want to be with Meri. The end of their date and the ending was weird to me. When they were saying happy anniversary to each other and Kody was smiling so hard lol. Maybe Meri feeds his ego lol.

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2 hours ago, chuckity said:

I would totally watch a show with Meri, Christine & Janelle moving into a big house together (suck it Kody) and re-joining single life.

Possible show titles:

Sister Wives:  Starting Over

Sister Wives:  Moving On

Sister Wives:  Love should be subtracted

Sister Wives:  Kody and Robyn are dead to us

Sister Wives:  Love should be “minused” out. 😂 

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(edited)
4 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Let's be real. Meri is hanging on for the TV exposure so she can continue to collect the paycheck. If Mr. Right comes along after the show is over, she will be over, too. 

Gabe gives no shits about showing his contempt for Kody right in front of his face. I like Gabe because he's always been a straight shooter and doesn't care if the camera is rolling. 

Christines house is ugly. 

She's 42. It won't be so easy to get preg again. Unless she's fertile myrtle. 

Isn't Gabe the son who was a fantastic high school wrestler looking to wrestle in college until Kootie required him to move Flagstaff during his junior year of high school for no discernable or defendable reason?  

Edited by readheaded
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(edited)
5 minutes ago, readheaded said:

Isn't Gabe the son who was a fantastic high school wrestler looking to wrestle in college until Kootie required him to move Flagstaff during his junior year of high school for no discernable or defendable reason?  

Yes. Gabe, Ysabel,  Gwyn, and Aurora are all old enough to have been massively jerked around by two moves with almost no discernable reason, and that has to be unbearable for them. ETA actually a 3rd move for Aurora because she also was yanked from St. George to Lehi.

Edited by NoWhammies
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If Gabe’s attitude of disdain for social distancing was only affecting his ability to see Kody, then I would be fine with it. But it’s affecting Janelle’s family’s safety as well as their being able to mix with the rest of the extended family. So I just find him to be selfish.

i don’t hold his anger at Kody against him at all. That is righteous anger. I just think he is being very selfish as far as the COVID risk. I heard him say “I’m not at risk” (presumably because he is young and healthy), which is a jerk attitude to have.

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7 hours ago, Onecattoo said:

“I don’t want to do anything, I just want to complain about it”.  Kody just perfectly summed up his entire life as a husband, father and person in general. 

His quote is kind of perfect for several 13-year-old girls I know.

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8 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Some tweets from last night. Meri and Christine did not participate.

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In response to Kody:  then don't broadcast your marital FAILINGS in a TV show that you expect to be paid for.

Get off my TV screen with your crap.

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I have said this before, Meri put the final nail in the coffin when she was actively courting a fake relationship via that catfish.  She would be long gone if Sam were a real man and Kody knows it.  We don’t see everything that is said and done and Kody was humiliated by that situation.  I can’t believe that off camera he didn’t ask her if she was going to leave him.  He is punishing her for that whole situation.  He’s a jerk and even she shouldn’t put up with that shit.   Also, I read somewhere that none of the kids really liked Meri that she was a bully.  Madison called her out on that with her tweets.  For someone that wanted the family not just the man, Christine is more concerned about the man.  She can’t stand to see him with any of the other wives.  She is ruled by jealousy, especially towards Robyn.  Robyn and Meri used to be pretty close but seems after the catfish crap came out Robyn sort out distanced herself.  Although Kody is a complete moron, not sure why Gabe is directing his anger toward him when it was Janelle who didn’t want him around during lockdown.  Gabe’s anger is a culmination of everything since Vegas IMO.

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(edited)

I agree with Meri.  A lot of folks feel obligated to visit family and friends. So, those people are conveniently using Covid as an excuse to not socialize. 

I don’t think viewers were surprised to learn that Janelle doesn’t make her bed and is a lousy cook.  I hate to say it, but she strikes me as being lazy. If I were in her shoes, I would be extremely concerned that my “adult” sons could possibly bring home the virus.  Especially if I were obese. 

Kody strikes me as someone who can hold a grudge.  He may say he forgives but will never forget.  I don’t think he will ever forgive Meri for the catfish incident, the same way he hasn’t forgiven Christine for not welcoming Robyn with open arms. 

Edited by Adeejay
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49 minutes ago, Onceafan said:

Oh wow guys, many pages of notes on last night’s episode Let’s start with Kody/Meri shall we? Cause I have a lot to say about Kody/christine, and Kody/Janelle and her children. Counselor hat on.

What I saw and heard last night, is not uncommon in mixed agenda couples. One spouse is clear that they have no desire or interest in the relationship, while the other still has hope that their relationship can be renewed. This two differing agendas played out in full display during their anniversary outing.

Take a look at Kody’s language: “I’m trying to get Meri to realize some things that might help her improve her life.” Or “I’m trying to help Meri determine if she has a spark or if she is just lonely for anything.”

So under this guise, Meri is the only one that needs development, and clearly doesn't know her own mind or feelings. In reality, Kody is trying to implement his own will/agenda onto Meri. As Kody stated, he can’t tell her where they are at, they need to agree on it, so Kody can maintain his image.

So to try and make her agree to an exit strategy, he uses emotional starvation as his main tactic.

Even after years of emotional starvation, she continues to voice hope. So his tactics escalate. He tells her he doesn’t love her. He has no real interest in a relationship with her. He talks about her cruelty. All forms of reaching out by her, are slapped away.

His comment that she needed to “be lovable,” implies that she is in fact unlovable in his eyes, and not worthy of love.   

And yet, even with such  escalation on his part, we cut to Meri during her interview, which was filmed after this outing, to her saying she’s not giving up, and she’s not a quitter.

As for Meri, I can say with all truthfulness that as a counselor, I see time and time again, a person fight to stay in a marriage that is unhealthy for them.   Is she in a toxic relationship? Yes. Is she clinging to a hopeful fantasy of a reconciliation one day, that is leaving her stuck in a place without love? Yes. These are all questions that as a counselor I would discuss with her. But Meri is an adult, and Kody has made his stance and feelings of disdain very clear, and so she continues her agenda with her eyes wide open. If she is not in a place of acceptance of moving forward, that is a decision she is allowed to make. I have had spouses separated for 15 years, with one still holding out hope, while the other has moved on with a new family.

The last note I wrote for Meri on my page was simply this. If you have to repeatedly live in the past to tolerate the present, then you will never have a future.

 

Yes!!! Emotional starvation. I love that term. That is exactly what Kody does to punish his wives.

I have a question. With the death of Meri's mother, do you think a tragedy like that could motivate her to possibly leave Flagstaff, and move to Utah to the Bed and Breakfast, and to be closer to Mariah?

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I have a question. With the death of Meri's mother, do you think a tragedy like that could motivate her to possibly leave Flagstaff, and move to Utah to the Bed and Breakfast, and to be closer to Mariah?

I think she probably already spends most of her time there except when they are filming and they need to pretend to be one big happy family.

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7 hours ago, Kellyee said:

I'm starting to realize this season that Janelle is a very passive parent who can't control her kids. And Kody probably stops by once a week. So the older boys are running the show. Christine once admitted on camera that Aspyn was basically the second parent in her house. I don't think Kody really does much parenting at all. Except with Robyn, who can't seem to get any of her kids to grow up and needs constant assistance.

 

 

 

 

Logan and Christine raised the older children, and I think Meri was the one who would discipline them. With Meri no longer involved with the children, I really don't think any of them get any real discipline.

 

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16 hours ago, eskimo said:

So Kody's faith and conscience won't allow him to tell Meri she needs to leave, but it WILL allow him to treat her like worthless garbage until she leaves on her own.  That's an interesting faith and conscience you got there, Kody...  

It also shows he’s lying about plural marriage being about the afterlife when he keeps talking about who’s happy and whoS not and what they all should do. Meri called it when she said Does he just get to change his mind and decide who he gets to take along. What an ASS (him, not her).

Don’t the “tenants” of their “religion” require him to BE a husband? I get not wanting to have sex if you’re at odds but if he actually expects a “spark,” then he needs to realize they need to spend time together and get to know each other again. But it’s crystal clear he wants to make her miserable enough to finally give up and he won’t be the bad guy. UGH he is awful  

He expects Meri to make all the overtures so he can slap her down. 

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2 hours ago, islandgal140 said:

Okay, the one time I really, rilly, needed a Ron Howard-like Arrested Development style narrator was when Kody asked the question if all of his wives would be better off married to another man

Ron Howard voice-over: They would.

I can promise you with all that I am that when Kodouche asked that question, I literally yelled "YES" at the TV.  No one is happy in these relationships and a true polygamist marriage looks like the Dargers and not like the Browns.  So I don't know what the hell these people are doing, but they need to stop it before someone literally gets hurt or killed.

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15 minutes ago, LucyEth said:

Robyn and Meri used to be pretty close but seems after the catfish crap came out Robyn sort out distanced herself.

Internet rumors that Robyn and her nanny/relative Mindy Jessop had some degree of pot stirring culpability in the catfishing drama. Can't remember what or where I read it, but knowing what we know now about the Dark Queen, her rise to the top and disconnect from her "friend" Meri, wouldn't be surprised.

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24 minutes ago, b2H said:

In response to Kody:  then don't broadcast your marital FAILINGS in a TV show that you expect to be paid for.

Get off my TV screen with your crap.

In response to Janelle, if she is so offended by the "Knives out" mentality of some people then maybe she should block Kody as well.

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9 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Some tweets from last night. Meri and Christine did not participate.

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Kody, you’re the one on international TV making it our business. Normal people work out their issues and humiliate their partners in private. 

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Very telling when Robyn brought her kids over to say Happy Birthday to the forgotten child, Truely.  Just like a perfect sister wife should.  Kootie is at Christines after being at  Robyn’s constantly but as she leaves he smiles and stares at her and his perfect family of King Sol and most precious Arabellabiola, stares and smiles.  Other ladies, just leave him to her.  Make sure you get the money and go.

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3 hours ago, the-grey-lady said:

Basically he wants her to keep throwing herself at him so he can reject her over and over again. That's just cruel.

I kind of see it as the opposite - he hates that she throws herself at him on camera where he has to reject her in contradiction to his "I can never figure out where Meri stands on our relationship" copout for their relationship breakdown. Of course, I don't think she's sincere about it, either - I think she fully knows and accepts it's over (except for the show) and is trying to make him look bad. So it's a weird little dysfunctional pas de deux. 

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5 hours ago, LilyDutch said:

Nah it doesn’t work that way remember?  According to their faith it’s God’s will and the willingness of another baby spirit that longs to be Brown Baby 19.... 

 

It would be so great if the spirit waiting to be born was in Aurora's womb. From my viewer's perspective, anyway. 

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(edited)
12 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Math is hard for Kody. Love should be multiplied, not divided. 🤦‍

Well, at least for the kids---with the exception of the 5 with Robochin-- the math is that  the kids get 4 times the moms, and 1/4 the dad. 

Also when he went on the beach trip with the middle girls--Aurora, Gwen, Ysabel, Breanna, and Savanah--he kept referring to the 5 of us, not the 6 of us.   I suspect it was Savanah he forgot about.

Edited by Twopper
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