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S09.E11: Secrets of the Past


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14 hours ago, Crazy Bird Lady said:

Still no Deonna on "Unfiltered"!  

I’m thinking production is giving her a pass since she had her “ problem” ten years ago.  Plus, she doesn’t like to answer questions.  This, to me, should have been spoken about when they hired her.  It’s not fair to the others, if it’s true.

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5 minutes ago, Lindz said:

Ohhhh Keith. This is how a laid back personality is bad, unless they cut where he challenges her. He's just taking what she's giving & telling the camera it's not good enough, she's immature. TELL HER. CHALLENGE HER to give you more!! Put. In. The. Work!! Interesting the perspectives on her secret. 😂 I guess that's what he was looking forward to all day since he doesn't know if she makes him happy. Those sex questions are annoying. They should've been more relevant or to consider for the future, now they got an "expert" explaining how to answer/interpret the question. Stupid

He has told her, more than once, that he associates experience with emotional maturity and that his "concern" is not her lack of boink but rather the fact that she can't even talk about it.  The result - she pouted, told her mommy, took her dice and went home.  He walks on eggs re the virginity and also about discussing it with her, because she has, more than once, gone into lemonade mode about it.  While not all the questions with their games were appropriate, she could have managed them better, as even the new "expert" mentioned.  His not knowing for sure whether she makes him happy doesn't seem like such a stretch.  The quarter swallower is sometimes a handful. 

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10 minutes ago, GenY said:

Greg pressures Deonna for sex and gets no ire but Amber who just wants to spend time with Matt gets crucified for her bad hair. I’m confused. 

To be fair, even though Deonna and Matt are both the less affectionate halves of their respective pairs, they are miles apart in terms of how much interest they show their partners. If Deonna didn’t show up at their shared apartment for days at a time and Greg still hadn’t met anyone in her family, I’d think he should give up, too. 

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2 hours ago, nr65000 said:

So is it what Jamie said or how he said it, because frankly I was yelling at her from my couch to shut the hell up as well.  I get that yelling at your wife to "shut up" is not acceptable but she was ignoring obvious social cues from the group and continued to interrupt the Nascar guy.  If he had been standing right beside her maybe he could have whispered in her ear nicely to please not interrupt but he was standing on the other side of the group and I think he was embarrassed by her.  NOT saying how he handled it was ok by any stretch, just saying that I kind of get why he reacted in that way.  They both go from 0 to 60 pretty fast.

I legit wondered if she was drunk because who acts like that? The NASCAR guy is going through his spiel, which presumably he does with every group that comes in (my best friend lived in Charlotte for a couple of years and did that activity as part of a work retreat) and clearly the social cue there is "it's time to listen." And Elizabeth is yelling "HEY GUYS, I LIKE NASCAR" as he's talking. Like, if she were five, that would be a point where a parent or guardian would say "I know you're excited but we have to listen to the man now so we know what to do." Elizabeth is thirty.

23 minutes ago, LilaFowler said:

Keith's mom is the clear MVP. What a beautiful, thoughtful and articulate woman. She is miles ahead of any of the quack experts.

Both Keith and Iris's moms are great. It's very telling that when Keith's mom asked if Iris made him happy, Keith said he didn't know. That means no. If you have to wonder if someone makes you happy, they don't.

Iris dancing was the least sexy thing I've ever seen.

When Matt said he had a sister, I was pretty surprised because why wouldn't the sister come to the wedding? Apparently his parents have restraining orders out on each other so can't be in the same place, but the sister?

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5 minutes ago, Kareem said:

He has told her, more than once, that he associates experience with emotional maturity and that his "concern" is not her lack of boink but rather the fact that she can't even talk about it.  The result - she pouted, told her mommy, took her dice and went home.  He walks on eggs re the virginity and also about discussing it with her, because she has, more than once, gone into lemonade mode about it.  While not all the questions with their games were appropriate, she could have managed them better, as even the new "expert" mentioned.  His not knowing for sure whether she makes him happy doesn't seem like such a stretch.  The quarter swallower is sometimes a handful. 

Yeah & what else? Where's the depth? Where'd he ask questions to gauge her maturity & emotionally connect on his own? He can't just say, "I'm concerned," & do nothing to work through his concerns. Seems like he's sitting back & doing nothing about it. Guess that makes it easier to say No on Decision Day. 😒😂

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15 hours ago, Mazzy said:

All these couples are ridiculous. It's like this year they purposely tried to match people they knew wouldn't make it. Elizabeth and Jamie are both hot heads and that is never a good combo. Keith is laid back while Iris is so uptight she has different sinks for different washes and you can't get on the bed in clothes that touched the air outside! The teacher and the moron = the clinically needy vs the globe trotter who is never home. And Deonna and [can't remember his name] are a stand offish and very private woman paired with an open and super affectionate man. None of them make any sense unless 1. the "experts" are utterly terrible at their professions, 2. psychology profession in general is a joke, or 3. they purposely chose to have a season of train wrecks.

It's mostly (3), with a generous splash of (1) tossed in for finesse.

Edited by Crazy Bird Lady
too long
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32 minutes ago, Lindz said:

Ohhhh Keith. This is how a laid back personality is bad, unless they cut where he challenges her. He's just taking what she's giving & telling the camera it's not good enough, she's immature. TELL HER. CHALLENGE HER to give you more!! Put. In. The. Work!! Interesting the perspectives on her secret. 😂 I guess that's what he was looking forward to all day since he doesn't know if she makes him happy. Those sex questions are annoying. They should've been more relevant or to consider for the future, now they got an "expert" explaining how to answer/interpret the question. Stupid

Well said! Keith can't just sit back and wait for Iris to act the way he wants her to. Especially when he won't even talk to her about his wants and needs. Where is his openness and vulnerability? 

30 minutes ago, GenY said:

I am not sure about other people’s dating status’ on the forum but if anyone’s single and above 25 on here there would probably be a bit more understanding of why Deonna and Amber are the way they are. It’s hard out there. 

Greg pressures Deonna for sex and gets no ire but Amber who just wants to spend time with Matt gets crucified for her bad hair. I’m confused. 

People have been posting from the beginning that most posters are harder on the women than the men. And I agree. 

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Jamie and Elizabeth,

Wow. What an amazing scene this couple seems to have had an epiphany visiting her old neighborhood. She is crying, he is comforting even rubbing her runny nose over his face. The are kissing, holding hands, talking about the future....then it happened. It was like the transfiguration from Dr Jeckle to Mr. Hyde. Within moments the horns popped out, the fangs dropped from their mouths they couldn't move away enough from each other in that car. 

I do pin this implosion on Elizabeth. Most rational people who agree they did something wrong aim not to repeat it or excuse it or worse embarrass the person you're with. On the other hand Jamie reacted with issuing yet another in an endless series of ultimatums. He could have handled it to smooth it over but that only helps until the next eruption. He says he enjoys the wild and carefree aspects of Elizabeth but this is what comes with it. Its like the woman who loves her over the top reckless 'crazy' boyfriend until they marry and have kids and then she wants him to behave like mild mannered Clark Kent. Guess what he's going to continue to be the fool you fell in love with.

The experts, producers who ever should step in and not demand they separate or call it off but they can say we failed we don't believe this has a chance of working and if either of you would like to call it a day, we'll support that decision. Or just move out until decision day. The problems with this couple can't be patched or communicated away they both have strong foundational personality issues that are stumbling blocks to a working selfless relationship. At least in the world according to me : )

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34 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

When Matt said he had a sister, I was pretty surprised because why wouldn't the sister come to the wedding? Apparently his parents have restraining orders out on each other so can't be in the same place, but the sister?

I thought he said that he distanced himself from everyone - including the sister - when the divorce happened? I may have imagined that.

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12 hours ago, LilaFowler said:

Amber... the less said, the better. Matt has finally figured out that she's desperately using sex as a tether to him and wisely cut her off. She looks utterly defeated. I can't imagine her dating life will improve much after this show. Guys will run from her. She needs therapy and to work on herself a lot.

Spoiler

On Unfiltered, Amber said more than once about her ideal amount of sex ...was daily.  She needs it daily.  Therefore she is in bad way then during this slowdown, maybe defeated.

Edited by MajorNelson
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I almost think the Iris change story was the show trolling us. Who in their right mind would think that is a real secret? Keith is getting up with her rules and rigidity. I think Deonna and Greg are fine, they are both calm reasonable people who are slowly getting to each other.

Amber and Matt and Jaime and Elizabeth should never have been selected for this show. Matt likely had a dysfunctional childhood which he had to escape from and never recovered (I know just how it is) and Amber has issues with being desperate and trying to hold on too hard. 

Elizabeth either has mental health issues or addiction issues that we are not seeing. However, I still like her better than Jaimie because he is a mean and awful person. Thank goodness he doesn't want kids. I really can't imagine him going back to dealing with clients who have watched this show. The only couple who might make it are Greg and Deonna. Keith wants a woman who is more mature and doesnt have rules about sinks and lemonade. He is a good looking, calm guy and he will find someone. 

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Husband tells you to STFU (generally I’d say this was wrong but she was so rude and refused to see it) - let’s look at your childhood home!

Don’t have any self esteem - let’s look at your childhood home!

Only way you’re going to remotely have your wife touch you intimately is to have Caribbean dance lessons - let’s look at your childhood home!

Great individual, deep therapy...

Matt was doing all the talking because all that was his doing.  I think if he stops having sex with Amber now, he thinks it will lessen the blow and he won’t look so bad.  Amber just looked like a bobble head that whole segment nodding like she was in agreement.

Done with Iris.  She really is just clueless or really thinks she’s fooling the experts by doing the bare minimum to check off her homework list.

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Surprise! Surprise! Another rollercoaster ride with the dysfunctional couple & it's escalated to Elizabeth shoving a table. How was that NOT discussed?? That could be the starting point of worse things to come. That MUST be checked! Add it to the list (to burn) whenever they split. They still can't even talk to each other. Hopeless!!

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Jamie Completely mishandled the "shut up" incident at the racetrack. 

He should have shut her up in a PLAYFUL firm way. He couldn't just stand there - bc her actions do reflect him as his wife. She behaves exactly like my 3 year old niece - she throws tantrums, no self awareness, screeches in public, flipping tables, etc. When your wife acts like a child = treat her like a child, WITHOUT SHOWING ANGER. He could have said, "Im gonna give you to 5 to stop yapping before I put you in time out" with a smile. But Jamie is not a strong enough man to handle a crazy lady like Beth. I guarantee she would have shut up and everyone would have a laugh together. 

If I had to pick who is crazier - she is, hands down. His problem is, he has NO CLUE and NO STRONG FRAME to handle that kind of crazy, so he retaliates in anger, making the situation just ugly.

He COULD ignore her like you do a bratty kid, give her something to worry about without telling her outright, rather than pester her for sex, showing her how needy he is for her and giving her ALL the power.

Because- SHE holds all the power in this marriage, and she makes sure to show it, by reminding him and the viewers how often he begs her for sex. And she should not be in that higher position, lets just say that she should be grateful somebody married her. 

Edited by Lily247
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14 hours ago, CSunshine76 said:

Swallowing  quarter as a child is Iris’ deepest darkest secret? WTH lady.  She is never going to open up and be vulnerable with Keith.

Iris let me explain something to you- you better try harder!  There is no way you will be getting any seconds dates after this is over when you happily explain how you are a 28 year old DIVORCED virgin!

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I have said this a few episodes back and nothing has changed. This season is soooooo boring, because nothing has changed from maybe week 2 and we know where each of them will end up.

Amber and Matt - She is STILL pathetically desperate and he is STILL uninterested and checked out - They SHOULD and WILL SPLIT.

Iris and Keith - she is even more annoying and immature and he is STILL being patient and respectful, but he has checked out and she STILL doesn't have a clue about how immature and annoying she is. I think she will be surprised, but they SHOULD and WILL SPLIT. And is she that good of an actress or just that stupid that she felt really proud of herself for sharing that asinine "secret?"

Big Red and Jamie - STILL toxic and nasty. For some reason they seem to think they are in love, but they are both seriously in need of therapy. They SHOULD SPLIT, but if they stay together because they are just that stupid, no one gives a damn. Just don't hurt the dogs.

Deonna and Greg - slowly learning about each other. The are the only ones with a chance. They SHOULD and WILL STAY TOGETHER. (Now, by the time we get to the reunion show, if Deonna is still hiding behind the walls, he might be ready to end it, but I don't think so).

Edited by Retired at last
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15 hours ago, CSunshine76 said:

Swallowing  quarter as a child is Iris’ deepest darkest secret? WTH lady.  She is never going to open up and be vulnerable with Keith.

I totally agree that Iris's secret sucked...pick your favorite genital. 

But I'll ask again, where is Keith's openness and vulnerability? He has concerns, but he has to give something, too. 

After Quartergate, why couldn't Keith share a secret with Iris and then tell her that's what he believes Dr. Viviana meant? And then he could prompt her to share a real secret.

Keith is really kind, and he's sexy AF, but it's clear that he's used to women doing the heavy emotional lifting in relationships. He gets to be the nice guy-- which I'm not criticizing -- but doesn't take any emotional risks that might jeopardize his "good guy" image. 

2 hours ago, LilaFowler said:

Amber... the less said, the better. Matt has finally figured out that she's desperately using sex as a tether to him and wisely cut her off. She looks utterly defeated. I can't imagine her dating life will improve much after this show. Guys will run from her. She needs therapy and to work on herself a lot.

I actually think it's the other way around. I don't think Matt has ever felt an emotional connection to Amber. But he knows she likes him and desires him, so all along, he's been having sex with her despite knowing that he doesn't want her. And she has no idea (or she's refusing to accept what his behavior is screaming loud and clear). 

For example, when Matt came home after being out all night, and they talked about it, Amber asked him, "How about a hug?" Even though she shouldn't have had to ask for a hug. Matt was the one who stayed out all night and didn't communicate. Why didn't he initiate the hug? Anyway, at that moment, Amber was asking for affection and reassurance. Matt's answer was "Just a hug?" So he wanted to have sex with Amber but didn't want to give her affection or reassurance. That's just cruel. 

I completely agree with everything else you said. This show was not a good move for either her career or her dating life. And she needs therapy. Bad. 

I would suggest that Matt get therapy too, but I can imagine his sessions:

Therapist: So Matt, how are you feeling today?

Matt (bug-eyed stare): Um... [scratches his beard],   Um...

Edited by topanga
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2 minutes ago, Apollo said:

I wonder if she was trying to get her 15 minutes of fame?  Well, too late, Teresa Giudice did it first and did it better.   

PROSTITUTION WHORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I never watch the Unfiltered show but I just saw a few seconds at the end.

Gosh,  Jamie (the host) has some serious new long hair extensions. I think she is able to sit on them.

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See, I don’t think Iris has any real secrets.  She’s a child.  She said something to the effect that she was grinding on her husband whom she is “just getting to know” with lights on instead of like in a club.  She couldn’t handle it. I wouldn’t be sexually attracted to her childlike countenance were I Keith. 

Big Red’s poor dogs were terrified when she flipped out.  And her screeching about “me me me” when the poor tour guide was trying to talk...he even started over and she was still screeching about herself.  Ugh. And her shrilling “why didn’t anyone stand up for me!!???”....well, Elizabeth, rewatch the scene and you will see why. 

Edited by Meowwww
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4 hours ago, nr65000 said:

So is it what Jamie said or how he said it, because frankly I was yelling at her from my couch to shut the hell up as well.  I get that yelling at your wife to "shut up" is not acceptable but she was ignoring obvious social cues from the group and continued to interrupt the Nascar guy.  If he had been standing right beside her maybe he could have whispered in her ear nicely to please not interrupt but he was standing on the other side of the group and I think he was embarrassed by her.  NOT saying how he handled it was ok by any stretch, just saying that I kind of get why he reacted in that way.  They both go from 0 to 60 pretty fast.

I think it's the fact he told her to shut up and it was in front of everyone, which was embarrassing to her; what she doesn't seem to realize is that she was embarrassing herself by talking over the instructor and bragging about her knowledge of Nascar.....

Jamie should have just taken a page out of Steph's book last season - when your spouse is acting like an ass, just ignore them, walk away, or go take a nap. Their behavior is no reflection on yourself. Instead, he made himself look like a jackass by telling his wife to shut up.......

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14 hours ago, sarkygal said:

I’m not a fan of Elizabeth’s by any means, but dude keeps saying he loves her and wants to stay with her. He treats her like a sex doll he wants to program. 

And I know this is a poorly over edited show, but he’s not much better than last season’s Luke to me. 

For me the difference between the 2 couples is that while his behavior reminds me of Luke’s , Beth fight back more 

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30 minutes ago, topanga said:

I actually think it's the other way around. I don't think Matt has ever felt an emotional connection to Amber. But he knows she likes him and desires him, so all along, he's been having sex with her despite knowing that he doesn't want her

Doesn't this sound a bit like Dave and the other Amber??

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2 hours ago, GenY said:

I am not sure about other people’s dating status’ on the forum but if anyone’s single and above 25 on here there would probably be a bit more understanding of why Deonna and Amber are the way they are. It’s hard out there. 

Greg pressures Deonna for sex and gets no ire but Amber who just wants to spend time with Matt gets crucified for her bad hair. I’m confused. 

I don't see where Greg is pressuring Deonna for sex. She came on a television program because she wanted to get married. Then she had sex with her husband on his birthday. It's not at all surprising that Greg would be confused about her shutting down after that one time and asking about it only to get a non-answer. Maybe things are different for them off camera but truthfully no one here knows, so we can only comment on what we see on the show and to me it shows Deonna not being forthright about both her past and the sex thing. And then she wonders why he's perplexed?

As far as Amber goes, I get that it's tough out there but appearing and acting completely desperate and blubbering through a selfie cam moment saying that she's willing "to do anything" to save a relationship with a guy she barely knows but threw herself at and who treats her like trash points to someone who needs serious help. I can't be of the mindset that "Well, it's tough out there to find someone so let me do everything I possibly can to please this loser into staying with me."

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

Iris is just a walking, sexless, constantly yapping stick.   She really does need to just go sit on a porch somewhere in a rocking chair and just sip lemonade.  Really.

I wonder if she's *still* swilling lemonade to try to rust that quarter out of her digestive track.

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1 minute ago, eyelash said:
  1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

Iris is just a walking, sexless, constantly yapping stick.   She really does need to just go sit on a porch somewhere in a rocking chair and just sip lemonade.  Really.

Well, Greg's house is empty and has a sun deck and porch!

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19 minutes ago, Meowwww said:

Big Red’s poor dogs were terrified when she flipped out.  And her screeching about “me me me” when the poor tour guide was trying to talk...he even started over and she was still screeching about herself.  Ugh. And her shrilling “why didn’t anyone stand up for me!!???”....well, Elizabeth, rewatch the scene and you will see why. 

She's someone who confuses being an asshole with being interesting.  She either can't read the room or she revels in not doing so because she thinks it makes her quirky and fun.  I can't imagine her in a successful relationship with anyone, but I would say the same of Jamie.  They didn't ruin any families when they matched the two of them.

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51 minutes ago, topanga said:

But I'll ask again, where is Keith's openness and vulnerability? He has concerns, but he has to give something, too. 

After Quartergate, why couldn't Keith share a secret with Iris and then tell her that's what he believes Dr. Viviana meant? And then he could prompt her to share a real secret.

I agree to an extent, but maybe he's just done at this point.  After Lemonade-gate and some of her other behavior, maybe he's had it.

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11 hours ago, Racj82 said:

Yeah I've basically given up. I'll be 37 in October. So, I'm not crazy old or anything but I went through a lot of rejection and false starts for years and after a while I just stopped trying. There's no deep dark secret. I have a full-time job, no kids, my own place, yadayada. I tried online dating but I never got any responses back. Quit that too. I've never been in a relationship my whole life. Maybe it was meant to be that way.

I'm older than you and I feel like the queen of first dates.  I've done the online dating.  After a date sometimes I would log back in and want to say "how do you think I'm compatible with him?"  I wonder what kind of mood I was in when I did the online test (eharmony).  Also, while trying not to get political, some of these guys are on the opposite end of the spectrum for me and I figure for the sake of my sanity, I just need to go past them. I just let my eharmony expire and thought about doing match, but decided I need a break.  I would love to meet someone, but at this point, it would take a major miracle.

Now on to the show.  Amber is so desperate to have a "husband" that she can't see anything else.  Matt is very clearly not into her, but she just doesn't see it.  Maybe because she teaches middle-schoolers, she has that mindset?  (no insult to middle schoolers).

Deonna and her high school boyfriend drifted apart?  I was expecting she was in an abusive relationship (emotional or physical) but they just drifted apart.  That's what happens most of the time when you go to college. 

Iris and her "I swallowed a quarter" secret.  I feel sorry for Keith because he is stuck with a 12-year-old for at least the next two weeks.  (OK, once again I'm not insulting this age group LOL).

Jamie and Liz just scare me. From the way he was acting nicer after she saw the land where her home was and then turning on dime and they were getting mad at each other.  It made me wonder did something happen that was edited out of the broadcast.

Edited by Lisa418722
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1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

He could have said, "Im gonna give you to 5 to stop yapping before I put you in time out"

Another idea: When my pup goes into Beast Mode like she did, we say Sit! Stay! And then i make Angry Face. That usually stops the tantrum. 

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1 hour ago, Apollo said:

"bitch, IZE KNOWS..."  ???  What rock did Elizabeth crawl out from under?  Who talks like this?  

My brain immediately went to the scene in Airplane with the white woman talking jive.  Leave all that Sharkeisha round the way girl shit alone and take your meds.

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I couldn't believe when Beth was talking over the instructor in her loud obnoxious way an she knew he was trying to talk to everyone.  She has no manners or basic social skills. Daddy ruined all of that by spoiling the crap out of her and continuing to do even though she is thirty years old. So now she's entitled and thinks the whole world is going is going to kiss her ass and worship her like daddy does. And when she sees it's not all about her she throws a fit an can't handle it. Just like a spoiled toddler or little kid does. As far as Keith and Iris, I can see on Keith's face he's done with the whole Iris an her cute little innocent 13 year old virgin mind. He doesn't think it's cute at all and I don't blame him. She thought he would worship the ground she walks on because she said she's a "virgin". Now she's disappointed and surprised when she finds out that he's not as into her act like she thought he and any man would be. She had that same exact smug look on her face, like she did last night after the coin secret, where she sticks her neck forward and has that weird smile on her face, when she told Keith's mom at the wedding why she was wearing a white dress. About Deonna and Greg, she is still acting like she's above him and it's annoying. She acts like he has no business trying to get to know her an acts all bitchy when he asks simple questions about her. She comes off like she's annoyed at him all the time. I did notice the rings around her neck like someone else did and thought it looked strange. I don't know if she will ever warm up to him. She's so cold to him all the time. As far as Amber and Matt, I knew at the wedding that he wasn't going to be into her when he sees her. She doesn't put any effort at all into her hair,  makeup or dress. Zero. He can get way, way better looking and he knows it. They should've matched him better. It's obvious he's not going to stick around. Her acting so desperate is the biggest turn off to men and that's why she will always get used an give her paychecks to guys so they will hang around a little longer.  She seriously needs to have her eyebrows shaped and do something with her hair. It looks hideous. She does have that Eddie Munster look going on with her hairline. She tries to keep him interested by constantly having sex but he got it right away the first night and he is bored and over it. As far as the experts, it was bugging me how the one last night I ( forgot her name) kept saying y'all. It did sound unprofessional and she kept saying it like every other word. I was surprised when I heard her talking like that. It seems like she would sound more professional. My favorite is Dr. Pepper. I've always liked her the most. To be fair to the experts, the people they choose that they think will be good matches obviously are putting on a fake persona when they are auditioning for the show and telling them how they are and how they would be in a marriage.  I think some of them just want to be on tv and never had the intention on taking the marriage seriously. So the experts hear all these wonderful things (fake) about the kind of person they will be in a marriage and they get blindsighted when the real true personality and character comes out. A lot of the people are not being truthful about themselves and their true intentions.  

Edited by ladyscorpio
I put a word in that shouldn't have been.
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4 minutes ago, ladyscorpio said:

She does have that Eddie Munster look going on with her hairline.

Ain't nothing wrong with a widow's peak! LOL  It's all the other unwashed and unstyled-ness of it all going on around it...

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Okay. Everyone is subject to fears, doubts, and feelings of inadequacy at times, but the insecurities of this cast are out of control. I wonder if Dr. Cilona's "instruments" would have helped weed some of them out ...

The wound of Amber's mother leaving has become a deep cavity of longing and despair. She doesn't believe she's worth loving.

Jamie and Elizabeth seem not to have any intrinsic feelings of self worth; it all comes from external validation. If they don't feel like they're actively and constantly being indulged and complimented, they lash out.

Iris lacks the confidence to even be an adult. She cocoons herself with persnickety rules as a way to have some control over a scary world.

Deonna's fear completely shut her down after past emotional trauma. (It is nice to see her making progress lately.)

Matt's a basic dumbass who's experiencing the loss of his career, the only thing that made him special in life.

Greg and Keith actually have some maturity and self confidence ... so that's 25% of the cast. Good job, experts and producers!

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5 minutes ago, Brooklynista said:

My brain immediately went to the scene in Airplane with the white woman talking jive. 

LOL. Way problematic now, but at the time, that was one of my favorite scenes in the movie. This little old white lady stands up: "I talk jive." 

I think Jamie and Beth are competing at this point to see who's the worst. Yes, Beth is loud, rude, and impetuous, but Jamie's anger is calm and cruel. He reminds me of a serial killer. 

13 minutes ago, For Cereals said:

I agree to an extent, but maybe he's just done at this point.  After Lemonade-gate and some of her other behavior, maybe he's had it.

I'm loathe to say that Jamie and Beth are better than the other couples, but at least their toxic, dysfunctional crap is out on the table for them and everyone else to see. 

I think Keith's growing frustration, and at least some of the problems between the two of them, come from lack of communication. They say things very clearly and succinctly when they're alone with the experts, but around each other, or when they're together with the experts, they don't work on their issues. Their marriage is doomed if they continue this pattern. 

Didn't they used to do "3 things I hate about you" every night? I wonder what happened to that. 

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18 hours ago, topanga said:

LOL. Way problematic now, but at the time, that was one of my favorite scenes in the movie. This little old white lady stands up: "I talk jive." 

Definitely problematic today. But...the *real* joke there was that she wasn't just any little old white lady. The actress was Barbara Billingsley, who was best known as *the* most wholesome mom of 1950s TV -- June Cleaver, from "Leave it to Beaver." 

Edited by Captain Asshat
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In reading through everyone's comments it's become abundantly clear that all four of these "ladies" are in some state of arrested development:

Iris: 27 year old virgin who thinks swallowing a quarter as a child is sharing a big secret that will foster intimacy with her husband.

Deonna: Drifting apart from a high school boyfriend when she left for college stunted her ability to engage in an adult relationship for a decade.

Elizabeth: Too many problems to name, but saying "Bitch, I knows what I did" as a means of communicating while wearing leggings and swaddled in a blanket kind of says it all. Plus, still letting Daddy take care of her is a big red flag.

Amber: The over emotional sobbing over this idiot transient who clearly doesn't like her; "I just want him to hold me". "I just like him". Clearly not over mom leaving and he is a trigger for childhood wounds.

These girls are all so damaged none of them should have been selected. Matt and Jamie clearly also have their own issues, but maybe if matched with someone else they might (and I mean with a very slim possibility) have done ok. These girls all need therapy.

Jamie told Elizabeth that time heals all wounds, but that is not true at all. Sometimes, wounds fester. All you have to do is look at this group to realize time most certainly does not heal all wounds........

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9 hours ago, STRIDER1 said:

I havent read any of the posts yet but did anyone else noticed that matt/ambers appt with the fake expert dr vivana was the only one that DID NOT have them watch a video then have to explain what happened in it? unless they did do it but was edited out/not shown for whatever reason.

not a big deal, but just thought that it was a bit unusual.

Also I noticed that the pseudo dr viviana wore a different outfit to each couples appt.

Wouldnt she be seeing all 4 in the same day, since they all live on the same building and wearing the same thing? or maybe she did but changed each time beforehand? hmm that was strange imo lol

They also didnt show everyones childhood home and/or memories

Yeah I notice things like that hahaha

Call me Mr. Observant lol 

Sherlock-Holmes.gif

NOPE. She saw them all on different days. I noticed because the screen flashed " 15 days before Decision Day" when she went to visit Jamie and Elizabeth and then it flashed "14 days before Decision Day" when she went to visit Amber and Matt. I think Iris and Keith were next and then Greg and Deonna's visit. I could have the last two mixed up. I did remember, however, seeing that whichever couple had the last visit from Dr. Viv, it was only 11 days before Decision Day. 

Maybe it was too exhausting for Dr. Viv to see all 4 couples on the same day.🤣

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19 hours ago, Crazy Bird Lady said:

Still no Deonna on "Unfiltered"!  

In the past there have been a few people that did not show up until later in the episodes. I know Molly was one of them and I think either Mia or Tristian? There were all these theories of why but it was simply they could not get time off of work. This is totally understandable. All these people are lucky they have gotten time off for a wedding and honeymoon, mini-moon and other filming and not having much notice. 

Greg's birthday for Deonna was very nice.  I know it was early on, but for Greg's birthday she bought him a big grocery store cookie. Greg was very kind and appreciative that she remembered. It is a just a huge difference between a $4.99 cookie and planning with family and friend a secret golf outing and party.  Maybe it is her 10 years without a serious relationship showing? I just remember my college roommate I had never met before had a birthday our first weekend in our dorm room and I at least got a cake , made a sign and a gift. i do think they will work out but mainly because Greg wants this marriage and is willing to stay and put in the work. 

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50 minutes ago, 2727 said:

Okay. Everyone is subject to fears, doubts, and feelings of inadequacy at times, but the insecurities of this cast are out of control. I wonder if Dr. Cilona's "instruments" would have helped weed some of them out ...
......
Iris lacks the confidence to even be an adult. She cocoons herself with persnickety rules as a way to have some control over a scary world.
 

Poseur Cilona, what a guy, easier to remember his jacket rather than his name.

Nice explanation of Iris' behavior.  She wants to be in charge of the dolls in her dollhouse, or the hostess at the tea (lemonade) party.

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LizBeth is a dumpster on fire...

Jamie is a can of lighter fluid....

Matt is a dull knife...

Amber is a tomato......

Iris is waiting for something to "click" and it is not Keith....she wants a virgin man....

Keith has a calendar marking off the days to Decision Day and payday...

He is completely turned off in her "act" of being disgusted by sex.

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26 minutes ago, silverspoons said:

In the past there have been a few people that did not show up until later in the episodes. I know Molly was one of them and I think either Mia or Tristian? There were all these theories of why but it was simply they could not get time off of work. This is totally understandable. All these people are lucky they have gotten time off for a wedding and honeymoon, mini-moon and other filming and not having much notice. 

Greg's birthday for Deonna was very nice.  I know it was early on, but for Greg's birthday she bought him a big grocery store cookie. Greg was very kind and appreciative that she remembered. It is a just a huge difference between a $4.99 cookie and planning with family and friend a secret golf outing and party.  Maybe it is her 10 years without a serious relationship showing? I just remember my college roommate I had never met before had a birthday our first weekend in our dorm room and I at least got a cake , made a sign and a gift. i do think they will work out but mainly because Greg wants this marriage and is willing to stay and put in the work. 

I thought the friends gathering at their apartment was his birthday party. Does it not count because that was family & friends week on the show? 

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1 minute ago, Soup333 said:

I thought the friends gathering at their apartment was his birthday party. Does it not count because that was family & friends week on the show? 

I thought the friends were pre planned and everyone hand friends, plus they did not have a birthday party or even sing happy birthday that we saw? I remember Greg showed a friend the cookie and said Deonna was thoughtful. They did not even cut the cookie up or have another cake (even if family or friends brought it). there was not a balloon or a sign. I'm not saying anything fancy but if it was a birthday, you would think someone stop off at dollar tree for a balloon?

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