S09.E11: A Countess No More

[izabella]

Lu didn't let Bravo film her wedding, which is why we just got the clips from what looked like someone's cell phone video.  Was the after-party staged just for the show so they could film something wedding related with the Housewives?  That's kind of what it seemed like to me.

Edited June 15, 2017 by izabella

[AnnaL]

OMG, YES!!!!!

It is coming!!!!

Dorinda's speech, please dear God let it be a drunken slurred speech. I love Dorinda when she is sloppy drunk.

BTW, was Tom choking Luann during that kiss? 

[nexxie]

What was that move - Tom grabbed Lu's neck to kiss her? 

[chick binewski]

Nice auto-erotic asphyxiation move there, Tom.

[Straycat80]

Lol! At Dorinda going to take a sip of her drink in the middle of Tom's speech. 

[sasha206]

On 6/14/2017 at 9:35 PM, Pickles said:

Wow, Carole is a major sourpuss in Chinatown.

So, Carole is now hinting that Tom is gay?

You know, after hearing the wedding toast, I'm thinking she's onto something.

Edited June 16, 2017 by sasha206

[hoodooznoodooz]

I don't need to see semi-digested food in Beth's mouth.

[mbaywife123]

Beth was in an "up" cycle this episode and was pretty funny with her comments.

[AnnaL]

Aww disappointed, it was not a drunken speech. 

It was a crazy speech but it would have been funnier had Dorinda been drunk. 

Why is it that when Tom talks about the wedding he always talks about if Luann married herself? he is always talking about how special this was for her and how happy she was and how she worked to make everything perfect. How about you Tom? How do you really feel? 

[escapetoreality]

This episode was funny as hell. Lots of legit and unintended humor.

[hoodooznoodooz]

Beth: Just the tip. Just to see how it feels.

Assistant: I knew she wouldn't let that go.

Edited June 15, 2017 by hoodooznoodooz

[HunterHunted]

Did Ramona bring Jim True-Frost as her "date?"

[ElDosEquis]

30 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

I feel like Carol is horrible in bed. 

She oozes sexual incompetence.

[Martinigirl]

Tom- I think we met at The Regency....yeah, probably last night diamond dick

[ladle]

36 minutes ago, Straycat80 said:

Avery's friends must have wanted to be on TV so bad when they agreed to hang out with Ramona and talk about...Ramona. Ugh! 

To be fair, I would agree to hang out with Ramona, and I don't even want to be on TV.  She is a fascinating case study!

Carole speculating about Tom's sexuality was not a good look on her.  I realize she was probably responding to a direct question, but still. 

[bravofan27]

Tom's neck move made me think he watches a lot of porn. Choking is in now. He's so with the times. Yikes. I feel like with Tom and Luann it's a LOT of smoke, and the mirror is in a different country. It's almost as weird as Sonya and Frenchie. As posters have commented, he may not be French. I think now, because he had a blank look when Luann said hello in French to him. I think Sonja told him to say he's French to make it more interesting and to escape googling.

[ryebread]

16 minutes ago, izabella said:

She was such a pill during that entire visit to Chinatown!  Not interested in dim sum, didn't like the plain chocolate ice cream she ordered, what was her problem? 

I think M&M eatin', Prairie dress wearin', feet on the dashboard petulant woman/child is the persona Carole thinks is the cutest.

I couldn't decide, if when talking about throwing Adam out, when she said, "Here's your skateboard, here's your Rollerblades now out, out, OUT!!" if she sounded proud to be the mommy of a 12 year old or if she really has had it with his immaturity.

[charming]

Wait. I thought it was bad when Bethenny and her minions were calling Luann a slut gold digging whore. Then they switched it up that Tom was broke and looking for a Sugar Momma. Plus his penthouse isn't really that great, here's the floorplan to prove it.

Prior to the wedding Bethenny and her minions wanted everyone to know that Tom was having sex with every available woman in NYC. Now that they're married suddenly he's gay and Luann uses a strap on? Better yet he's gay because he's 50 and had broken engagements? Really, Carole?  What a bunch of ridiculously bitter hags.

Pick a lane because you look desperate and bitter. Luann seems happy and living her life as she sees fit.

[WireWrap]

21 minutes ago, chick binewski said:

Fifty bucks says Frenchie isn't actually french.

He looks a little like Cedric (early BH) and sounds like him as well! LOL

[Neeners]

Lu looked really great. I was fully prepared to snark. I hate that this show has made me a fan of hers, but when we have people that literally use every single episode  to say *at least* one really shitty thing about her--I gotta side with the underdog. I looked, and this was the 11th episode. I challenge anyone to find a full episode where Bethenny and/or Carole didn't get a jab in behind her back. And yes, I know, they are all snarky in talking heads. But every freaking episode? Come on. Ridiculous. 

[Martinigirl]

Pretty sure Sonja found that fake french guy living on a park bench in Central Park.

[hoodooznoodooz]

I hate Ramona's laugh. 

[Mozelle]

I like Carole, but that she engaged in speculation about what Tom may or may not do in the bedroom was not a good look. It seems to a lot of people (myself included) that Tom and LuAnn are trying to prove so much that their union is the real deal, and who knows why Tom has never been married at this stage in his life, but leave the innuendoes alone.

That said, I totally get why Carole was asking questions in Chinatown. She, like me, is not an adventurous eater. Even if something is labeled--like blueberry lavender ice cream. Ha!--I want to hear from the server's mouth what's going in the plate. 

[enchantingmonkey]

32 minutes ago, Straycat80 said:

Sonja is criticizing Tinsley for dating a young guy? His old is Frenchie? 

I think he said he's 39, which may or may not be the truth.  

Avery's friend is right, you don't want a friend you always have to walk on egg shells with...but it will make for a boring Housewives storyline.  

Wouldn't it be funny if the stranglehold Tom put on LuAnn was something he did to Sonja when they were sex-capading, and he was actually flirting with Sonja.  I wouldn't put it past him.  

[chewycandy]

It looked like Frenchie (is his name Edgar?) was kind of enamoured with Luann...I saw a wink.

Sonja's boobs are distracting in her THs. The left one is about to pop out.

Carole kissed John on the mouth!

[breezy424]

Well, the video of Lu's wedding was very nice.  Nope.  I don't think it was taken by a cellphone.  That big a wedding you have a videographer and a photographer.  Looks like the after wedding party was a total production set up.  And yep, I thought Dorinda was going to do a drunk toast.

Beth's holiday party was so fake.  It was Beth's six minutes of a Skinnygirl event on Bravo.  I would love to see someone ask if there wasn't something else to drink besides her 'product'. 

Tinsley looked so much better with her hair tied up in ponytail.  Not like her usual dated look.

I guess Dorinda forgave Ro after the holidays.

Remind me to never take Carole out for food.  And Beth and Carole's continual snarking of Tom just comes off bitchy rather than the 'cool' girl vibe they're going for.

I don't mind Ro taking out Avery and her friends for diner but girl, you're not their peer.  You can have a ton of fun.  I've done it with my own kids.  But you've got to understand the 'lines'. 

These dates and boyfriends are pretty sad.  Desperate in the city. 

[HunterHunted]

1 hour ago, mbaywife123 said:

All of the lobster and seafood at Beth's party looked amazing! I would have been in food overload mode.

Chocolat chip cookie cup cocktail drink, yes please.

Ramona, Avery's friends are NOT Your friends or peer group. LOON!!

The chocolate chip cookies drink was from Dominque Ansel inventor of the cronut.

http://dominiqueansel.com/cookie-shots-come-to-new-york/

I love that Avery's friends barely dignified Ramona's suggestion of this multi generation hang. No "that would be cool." They straight asked if these friends had sons their age and that is the only shit they cared about.

Edited June 15, 2017 by HunterHunted

[enchantingmonkey]

7 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

Pretty sure Sonja found that fake french guy living on a park bench in Central Park.

If she did, she didn't pay much for his haircut.  It was so choppy looking in the back.  If you're going to claim to be French, shouldn't you have a nice haircut?

[Martinigirl]

2 minutes ago, enchantingmonkey said:

If she did, she didn't pay much for his haircut.  It was so choppy looking in the back.  If you're going to claim to be French, shouldn't you have a nice haircut?

...and understand  the French language.  LOL! Did you see his face when Lu spoke French to him? LMAO!

Edited June 15, 2017 by Martinigirl

[ElDosEquis]

Where can I buy one of those personalized ornaments, the ones with the SG logo on the back?

Edited June 15, 2017 by ElDosEquis

[Martinigirl]

I guess Adam was too busy making sexy salads and moving into his new tent home to attend the party?

[zoeysmom]

Bethenny might  want to dial back overinflated Ramona  boobs jokes: 

[njbchlover]

49 minutes ago, HunterHunted said:

I don't think Carole believed that Bethenny would tell Ramona, but not say anything to Carole because I didn't believe it either. If Bethenny said that Carole was boring within earshot of Ramona, then this is something that Bethenny has said straight to Carole's face. But there is no universe where ONLY Ramona has heard this.

How has Carole never had dim sum? Has she never been to Chinatown?

I found this so unbelievable about Carole, who tries to come across as much hipper and NYC-aware than the housewives from the UES.  Wasn't it Carole who poked fun at Ramona because Ramona didn't like going downtown?  

The more we see of Carole, the more I think that she is just as much of a snob as Ramona and Sonja can be.  

[Petunia13]

^yikes The Girls Next Door had more natural curves 

[FlyingEgret]

I dont think Beth drank anything from the SG luge... the amount in the bottle didn't change at all

[njbchlover]

24 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

Pretty sure Sonja found that fake french guy living on a park bench in Central Park.

Nah...I think she found him in the "personal ads" on Craigs' List.

[farmgal4]

1 hour ago, Pickles said:

Ramona's boobs are oozing out of that dress. 

Are you sure you're not talking about Sonya's during her TH?

[howiveaddict]

12 minutes ago, Martinigirl said:

...and understand  the French language.  LOL! Did you see his face when Lu spoke French to him? LMAO!

Someone has said before that her french pronounciation is terrible.  He still could be fake though.

Carole, next time you come live my life and I will go to Chinatown for Dim Sum.  Love Chinese food, and have always wnated to try Dim Sum.  Especially the  shrimp dumplings.

[Suck It Trebek]

21 minutes ago, chewycandy said:

 

It looked like Frenchie (is his name Edgar?) was kind of enamoured with Luann...I saw a wink.

 

Co-sign this! I didn't see a wink, but his eyes were definitely twinkling at her!

[ButterQueen]

Dorinda was just an exhausting bitch tonight.  Hey, if you are tired of attending parties, don't go.  But it's rude to tell a couple not to celebrate anymore.  None of your business!

I was bored with the eppy.

[Emmeline]

I am enjoying Tinsley more as the season progresses.  If she wants to date a young guy for now, you go girl!  Sonja is so jealous of Tinsley.  I think she sees herself 10 or more years ago.  As another poster wrote, who is she to talk, Frenchie is quite a bit younger than Sonja.  I think Frenchie is kind of cute.  He did seem to have his eye on Luann.

 

I am developing a theory about Bethenny and her issues with Dorinda's home in the Berkshires.  That is a lovely piece of property, but more importantly, it is a family home where many wonderful memories have been made and Dorinda cherishes it more because of that.  All the wonderful Christmas decor make it warm and cozy.  Bethenny is just not comfortable with that.  Remember how she freaked out and cried in the bathroom at her birthday party with Jason.

 

After seeing Beth's Skinny Girl colored Christmas tree I felt for Brynn.  When Bethenny was in the Berkshires and she made the comment about Avery being too old for the chocolate santa it made me sad for Brynn too.  My kids are grown and have families of their own but I still get everyone Easter, Halloween and Christmas treats, etc.

[snarts]

21 hours ago, Pickles said:

So, Carole is now hinting that Tom is gay?

Yes.  Last week he was incorrigible bachelor groping women all over the east side.  This week he's a closeted gay man using Luann as his beard.

Edited June 15, 2017 by snarts

[hoodooznoodooz]

Did I see a cross-eyed Chad staring at the bottom of his wine glass while sipping the last drop?

Edited June 15, 2017 by hoodooznoodooz

[Pickles]

Luann and Jill Zaria on WWHL. Jill's husband and daughter are in the audience. No sign of Tom! Lol. Yet, Luann says they do everything together. 

[howiveaddict]

Just now, Pickles said:

Luann and Jill Zaria on WWHL. Jill's husband and daughter are in the audience. No sign of Tom! Lol. Yet, Luann says they do everything together. 

He's at the Regency!  Or whatever it's called.

[ElDosEquis]

Carole is as about as sophisticated as wet newspaper.

IF she was going to co-write a cook book? She'd need a ghost writer.

But then again?

She probably can name every flavor of Pop Tarts and Hot Pockets?

-----------------

That is the beauty of living in a large Metro city.

THE FOOD.

But then again, I don't blame carole, it wasn't Sexy Dim Sum?

What gasses me is she 'dates' a cook/chef, yet has no inclination to experience the food scene?

Adam has to shoulder some of the blame, too? How in the living fuck can you live with/date someone who cooks for a living and be so out of the loop.

(My dream would be to snag one of the ladies on America's Test Kitchen....I like legs/thighs and breasts.)

A good meal with someone you like is a very intimate experience.  Going out with a friend and 'experiencing' a good meal/something new is what life is all about.

Even a meal that sucks ass can be fun, if you are so inclined to have a good time and to cross it off your bucket list?

People have commented on Tom being married in his 50's, but little about carole's sheltered food history? (I thought that journalists were daring, informed and cultured?)

I bet Carole can name every brand of  peanut butter?

-----------

Two rules about finding good places to eat.

1) Lines out the front door

and

2) word of mouth.

EVERYONE has a place that serves the BEST (fill in the blank).

[Sarcastica]

We have been hearing about this wedding for what felt like 80 yrs and they show about 3 mins of it? Bye. 

1 hour ago, izabella said:

Lu didn't let Bravo film her wedding, which is why we just got the clips from what looked like someone's cell phone video.  Was the after-party staged just for the show so they could film something wedding related with the Housewives?  That's kind of what it seemed like to me.

Aaahhhhhhh

[hoodooznoodooz]

Yikes. In the preview, Ramona with her hair-- bangs, wisps, and all-- slicked back into an extreme ponytail.

[mbaywife123]

Who cut off the abominable snow monsters legs and hung them on Beth's hearth?

[ElDosEquis]

1 hour ago, zoeysmom said:

Bethenny might  want to dial back overinflated Ramona  boobs jokes: 

I bet beffy made her 'stupid' assistant take about 12 shots before she picked the 'best' one.

What is it with the underarm vagina?