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Joy and Austin: This One Time At Family Camp

frenchtoast

By frenchtoast
in Counting On

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doodlebug

doodlebug

(edited)
23 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

This comment happened almost 30 years & it still irritates me to no end.

A few of us were speculating about the number of children we would end up with.  The others had two at the time & I had just one (who ended up being our only.) My one friend said if she had the choice of having only one child or none,  she wouldn't have any.  She said it with the assumption that having just one child automatically turns them into a spoiled brat & her viewpoint was the  correct one. That may be true in some cases but certainly not with my son. He ended up being our only child because of health problems on my side that worsened after he was born. 

I feel like I made a mountain out of a molehill at her comment but like I said after all these years it still irks me. No one knows the reasoning for the number of kids a couple has (or if they have any) except for the couple involved.

Back on topic: Luckily neither of our families asked when or if children were coming along in our family.  I can't imagine being the Duggs or Bates & being asked if you are pregnant as soon as you come home from your honeymoon.  

If being an only is what makes a kid a spoiled brat, what is the explanation for Josh Duggar?  Spoiled brats come from all sorts of families.

I am a frickin' gynecologist and I never, ever, ever, ever, ever asked any of my siblings if they were pregnant; even the one whose kids I delivered.  I figured I'd find out soon enough.

Edited by doodlebug
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sugarplum
sugarplum

I’m in the minority here and don’t see their posting on SM being a millennial thing, or just because they are on TV. I’ve had 3 close friends who have gone through something very similar. One was preg

Churchhoney
Churchhoney

Is that you, Michelle?

doodlebug
doodlebug

If a midwife did a vaginal exam and was able to tell she was 6 cm, it should’ve been reasonably easy for that same midwife to diagnose the baby as breech. It seems to me that these midwives don’t lear

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xwordfanatik

xwordfanatik

20 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

This comment happened almost 30 years & it still irritates me to no end.

A few of us were speculating about the number of children we would end up with.  The others had two at the time & I had just one (who ended up being our only.) My one friend said if she had the choice of having only one child or none,  she wouldn't have any.  She said it with the assumption that having just one child automatically turns them into a spoiled brat & her viewpoint was the  correct one. That may be true in some cases but certainly not with my son. He ended up being our only child because of health problems on my side that worsened after he was born. 

I feel like I made a mountain out of a molehill at her comment but like I said after all these years it still irks me. No one knows the reasoning for the number of kids a couple has (or if they have any) except for the couple involved.

Back on topic: Luckily neither of our families asked when or if children were coming along in our family.  I can't imagine being the Duggs or Bates & being asked if you are pregnant as soon as you come home from your honeymoon.  

I agree.  We were one & done too.  I had an easy pregnancy but a rough delivery.  We don't regret having an only daughter.

Wasn't it Jill (pre-rebel Jill) the one that asked Jinjer "are you pregnant?"  And Jessa said "I told them not to ask."  Our siblings all had kids before we did, and I didn't feel at all pressured, but with this Duggar bunch, I'm sure they get asked all the time.

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AryasMum

AryasMum

On 8/28/2020 at 8:57 AM, leighdear said:

Elegant has nothing to do with a name that will be rednecked into "Evy Mae".  It's a hick name, as is appropriate.  Evelyn will only be used on the marriage certificate she signs at 18, when her parents sell her virginity to a local yokel. 

And Joy couldn't even find a decent top to wear, pulling out a wrinkled, drab & stretched out t-shirt from the laundry basket ?  And of course she's barefoot.  So many fails, and another potato baby joins the planet.  

I’ve been fighting the redneck/hick opinion of my name my entire life. My middle name is a feminized version of my dad’s middle name.  My name actually rhymes with Ellie Mae. I had finally started embracing my name. ☹️  

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emmawoodhouse

emmawoodhouse

21 minutes ago, ozziemom said:

IIRC Jill snuck over to the TTH and “stole” a pregnancy test from Meeechelle’s stash. Quite the hijinks.

Didn't she just go downstairs and announce her pregnancy? I remember it being in the living room of the TTH, and there was a bible study going on. Upon hearing the news, Joy jumped out of her chair and her bible went flying.

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Pixie Chicken

Pixie Chicken

On 9/9/2020 at 10:22 PM, Scarlett45 said:

People actually say this shit to you?? That’s AWFUL! I’m so sorry. 
 

I don’t know what’s wrong with people. Women just can’t win- if we don’t have kids we are criticized, if we have one we are criticized etc etc. 

 

I would think people wouldn’t be so hateful and ignorant to say such things to Joy-Anna, but I won’t hold my breath. 

It's women who are the worst, but you're right -- we can't win. People with one kid are destined to have weirdos, but more than two is selfish and ruining the planet. I'm a SAHM and I'm either "a good mom who actually wants to raise her own kids" (gag) or a terrible waste of potential for leaving a career. For my situation, it just made more sense, financially and otherwise,  but that, like everything else, invites comment.  

I'm a witch, though, and the comments roll off. I had a lot of complications, so when people are really crass about Baby Boy #3, I sometimes respond with, "Oh, him? Yeah, he almost died in utero, so I'm actually fine with him having a penis." Hopefully the commenters think twice before saying things like that again. 

I feel for the Duggars for getting so much flak -- not the truly terrible stuff, because some of the criticism is warranted, but the nitpicking over benign stuff.  On the other hand, they're bound to hear it from strangers just by existing in a grocery store or at a park, so why they'd invite extra critique by posting so much of their lives online is beyond me. 

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lookeyloo

lookeyloo

2 hours ago, Nysha said:

I wonder how many times they had to reshoot in order to get the right reaction from the kids?

 

that is what is so funny about these "reality" shows.  They are scripted.  A real "reality" show would have hidden cameras around the house and we could just watch.  There was a show eons ago on PBS that did that, I think.

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lookeyloo

lookeyloo

13 hours ago, drafan said:

The most appalling part is something getting served directly from the can on the left side of the pic.

Made me laugh. My mother’s serving dish of choice growing up was the can the vegetables came in. Drain them and put on table. I didn’t eat heated vegetables at home. When I got married the first time that was the big change - heat if appropriate  and use a dish. I wonder if Jill or derick grew up like I did. 

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doodlebug

doodlebug

(edited)
9 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Here's a new video. I haven't watched it yet, so I can't give a review. ☹️

 

Definitely a vaginal delivery, Austin's back blocks any view of the birth although we get to see slimy, bloody baby up on Joy's belly.  The baby has an interesting caput (the swelling on the head from fitting through the pelvis).  You can tell Joy was stuck around 5 cm. for a period of time as the impression of the opening of her cervix is right there.  The caput is also towards the front of her head rather than the crown, so she was probably occiput posterior (sunnyside up) for much of the labor.

Joy says she was in active labor for 7 hours which is very  reasonable for a second baby.

Edited by doodlebug
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iwantcookies

iwantcookies

4 hours ago, lookeyloo said:

Made me laugh. My mother’s serving dish of choice growing up was the can the vegetables came in. Drain them and put on table. I didn’t eat heated vegetables at home. When I got married the first time that was the big change - heat if appropriate  and use a dish. I wonder if Jill or derick grew up like I did. 

I love to eat chef boyardee from a can for dinner lol. Makes less dishes. Whatever works!

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emmawoodhouse

emmawoodhouse

(edited)
5 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Definitely a vaginal delivery, Austin's back blocks any view of the birth although we get to see slimy, bloody baby up on Joy's belly.  The baby has an interesting caput (the swelling on the head from fitting through the pelvis).  You can tell Joy was stuck around 5 cm. for a period of time as the impression of the opening of her cervix is right there.  The caput is also towards the front of her head rather than the crown, so she was probably occiput posterior (sunnyside up) for much of the labor.

Joy says she was in active labor for 7 hours which is very  reasonable for a second baby.

Yes, Joy said Evy was sunny side up and that she tore.

Edited by emmawoodhouse
Too many she's.
Absolom

Absolom

37 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

You can tell Joy was stuck around 5 cm. for a period of time as the impression of the opening of her cervix is right there.  The caput is also towards the front of her head rather than the crown, so she was probably occiput posterior (sunnyside up) for much of the labor.

Is turning the baby more hazadous than letting labor progress with a sunnyside up presentation?  Sometimes they turn the baby and sometimes not.  I think it was Whitney Bates second baby that Dr Vick turned her.

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doodlebug

doodlebug

17 minutes ago, Snow Fairy said:

They said she pushed for an hour,poor thing. 

Average woman pushing with an epidural takes about an hour to push out a baby so Joy did just fine.

A woman who has never had a vaginal birth can push for up to 3 hours  with an epidural and still be considered normal as long as she is making progress.  A woman who has given birth vaginally is ok for up to 2 hours pushing with an epidural.

Longest I ever had anyone push? 6 hours.  This was 30+ years ago and the lady was a proponent of the Bradley method which discourages any and all interventions.  Her baby was posterior and her contractions were not regular enough or strong enough to rotate it or force it down, but she refused everything: an IV, pitocin, pain meds. And, heaven forbid, no forceps or vacuum extractor. Finally, after about 5 hours of futility, she let me start a little bit of pitocin.  Her contractions almost immediately became stronger and more regular and the baby started to move. Years later, she still referred to her labor as 'the nightmare'.  Some people have a hard time just getting out of their own way and labor is not something you can intellectualize into the experience you want.

31 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Is turning the baby more hazadous than letting labor progress with a sunnyside up presentation?  Sometimes they turn the baby and sometimes not.  I think it was Whitney Bates second baby that Dr Vick turned her.

Not necessarily, but not every doctor has experience with trying to manually rotate a posterior presentation and, even if he/she does, it doesn't always work.  It is not usually done until the mom is ready to push because the cervix has to be out of the way, too.

Breaking the water and giving pitocin to make the contractions stronger will often cause a posterior baby to rotate, too, and Joy had these things.

It is also possible for a baby to deliver in posterior position, particularly in a mom with a roomy pelvis.  Usually takes longer and can be more painful, but it happens.

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Scarlett45

Scarlett45

47 minutes ago, Madtown said:

After all they went through with Annabell, this video made me happy. Austin crying at the beginning when she was born, had me with the feels. My only hope is they stop with their boy and girl. They have a nice family, no need for 16 kids.

I highly doubt they will stop having children. Joy is very young, she could easily hit Michelle’s numbers-Michelle started later and had two sets of twins.
 

I don’t doubt Joy’s grief and pain over Annabelle was real, but I don’t think that would have any effect on the number of kids they choose to have in the future. 

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QuinnInND

QuinnInND

(edited)

Who was that lady in the room with them? When Austin was holding the baby after she got her temp taken. Sitting on the couch looking at her cell phone. Joy did really well. I'm glad she was successfully able to VBAC.  I really wish they would stop with 2 kids, but unfortunately they won't. 

I guess I was really lucky with my kids. I only pushed for 30 minutes with my son, and with the twins, we barely made it to the hospital. The older twin was crowning by the time we got there. 2 pushes and she was out. 7 minutes later, 2 pushes and her sister was born. And with my stillborn daughter, I pushed for about a half hour.  That labor was induced, because we found out she had died in utero the day before. I was still 3 weeks from my due date. 

Edited by QuinnInND
Snow Fairy

Snow Fairy

(edited)

Wow about pushing. Maybe my perception was wrong, but with my first (without epidural) I think I pushed for  maybe 15 minutes but it seemed like forever. With my second and epidural I think it was maybe a bit longer

 

Why does Joy always repeat that she is so happy it is a girl, they have a girl? Because of the loss of Annabell?

 

 

Quinn so sorry about your loss...

Edited by Snow Fairy
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doodlebug

doodlebug

1 hour ago, QuinnInND said:

Who was that lady in the room with them? When Austin was holding the baby after she got her temp taken. Sitting on the couch looking at her cell phone. Joy did really well. I'm glad she was successfully able to VBAC.  I really wish they would stop with 2 kids, but unfortunately they won't. 

I guess I was really lucky with my kids. I only pushed for 30 minutes with my son, and with the twins, we barely make it to the hospital. The older twin was crowning by the time we got there. 2 pushes and she was out. 7 minutes later, 2 pushes and her sister was born. And with my stillborn daughter, I pushed for about a half hour.  That labor was induced, because we found out she had died in utero the day before. I was still 3 weeks from my due date. 

The lady in the room with them is their doula, who also happens to be Austin's sister.

1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

I would imagine that the tearing is more common in posterior presentations?

yep

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farmgal4

farmgal4

3 hours ago, Madtown said:

After all they went through with Annabell, this video made me happy. Austin crying at the beginning when she was born, had me with the feels. My only hope is they stop with their boy and girl. They have a nice family, no need for 16 kids.

I think Austin is by far the most likable Duggar son-in-law.  He seems to be a great dad and husband.  

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