Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Sew Sumi]

???????????

[BunnyBlueBrown]

2 hours ago, RedheadZombie said:

Not taking anything from Jessica, but there's no way she got the full wattage.  The two men were barely holding her upright, and she didn't react typically.  Usually people look like they're having a grand mal seizure.

I don't like to see anyone being hurt unnecessarily, but I definitely believe these people should experience the effect, and at the proper wattage, before they're given the right to tase at will.

She wrote in the comments that it was only 2 seconds so maybe that’s why. I was accidentally tased once. I didn’t fall down, but I let a sound out of me that I didn’t know I could make. Some people just don’t react the same as being tased or maced. 

[Christina87]

2 hours ago, Libby96 said:

Good for Jessa for choosing a quality program for her children, but why are Jill and Jessa "homeschooling" when their kids are barely three (is Spurgie even 3 yet)?  Why can't you just read to your kid, converse with them, have some quality toys around, let them color and draw, maybe practice letters and wordplay if they are interested?  Kids that age learn by playing and doing.  A lot of formal instruction is not needed.  In fact, it can be counterproductive.

I'm guessing that's the way it was done in the TTH, to keep the little kids busy during "school time."

[Sew Sumi]

Looks like Jessa wants someone to give her a pat on the back. 

[Catfin]

6 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Damn, Jessica is a straight up badass. 

Let's see one of the Duggar boys take a shock from a taser and remain standing...

She was being held up. I find it interesting she’s sharing the video clip. I have a copy of DH getting tazed  when he was in training. They were under strict instructions not to distribute over social media.  

 

Good for her! 

[DangerousMinds]

Foretaste?

[Ijustwantsomechips]

18 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

I'm guessing that's the way it was done in the TTH, to keep the little kids busy during "school time."

Ha! I read your comment before reading the quote and thought you were referring to being tased for two seconds. It sounded plausible to me, and I had a good laugh so thanks.  

[RedheadZombie]

1 hour ago, Catfin said:

She was being held up. I find it interesting she’s sharing the video clip. I have a copy of DH getting tazed  when he was in training. They were under strict instructions not to distribute over social media.  

 

Good for her! 

They're barely holding onto her arms.  I don't think she would have shared the video if she were tased properly.

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

Foretaste?

And google says it's actually a word!

[Mollie]

8 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Looks like Jessa wants someone to give her a pat on the back. 

Well, this is what we have come to expect from Jessa, isn't it?  Her sister has a baby and Jessa makes that event all about Jessa:  Hey, look at me!  See how my baby looked two years ago!  I had a baby before Jinger did!  I taught Jinger parenting skills and let her practice on my baby!

Remember when Jessa posted 100 additional pictures from her wedding (nine months earlier) on the weekend of cousin Amy's wedding?  I do.

Jessa is incapable of letting someone else be the center of attention.

[IntoTheMystic]

I went on a couple of those ATI approved 'Journey to the Heart' brainwashings back in the day when I was a teenager. I think they might have been called something different. I don't really remember. My parents, for reasons I will never know, bought into Gothard and Quiverfull and ATI. The majority of my extended family, while religious, never took it to that level of crazy. I've always maintained that if my parents had read L. Ron Hubbard first they would have raised me in Scientology. If they'd met Jim Jones before Gothard . . . we'd all be dead. THAT is what I think of Quiverfull and IBLP/ATI. They're cults to me just like Jim Jones and Scientology. (Sorry if there are Scientology folk here.)

I don't like to talk about it too much. What I went through being a lesbian teenager in that culture was a living hell. It was drilled into my head that my life and afterlife would both be full of agony, suffering, and misery. I was told I would literally be repeatedly murdered daily in hell for being gay. Going back to that in my mind tends to make me want to gnaw open my wrists and take a hot bath. 

I will say this about Jessa. I love that Spurgeon the Sturgeon is talking about Peter Rabbit. If she was fully committed to ATI and IBLP and Gothard's teachings, she would not be wasting time with Peter Rabbit. Stuff like that is considered worldly and full of hidden messages from Satan and bad people and demons. Gothard railed against Disney and Saturday cartoons with an iron fist. Anything that didn't have a message about God was deemed unfit. Cartoons encouraged kids to believe in 'fantasy' and 'witchcraft' and higher powers than God himself like Ninja Turtles and Transformers and Inspector Gadget. We were told that all of that stuff, anything that made kids feel hero worship or even just enjoy freakin' Fred Flintstone, took away from God's word. We didn't have a television. I got hooked on a Soap Opera called Santa Barbara and would visit my non-religious aunt on weekends under the guise of having a job and we'd watch all the weekly eps she had taped every Saturday. Then she would give me cash to make it seem like I was paid for a job. I learned about life watching that soap. And when I was banished . . . that aunt and her husband took me in, paid for my education, and accepted me. 

I think Jessa genuinely loves her kids enough to let them be kids. I really do. And I think her motherly instinct, just based on what I've seen, is strong enough for her to fight for her kids if the church tried to turn on them. I think she would leave with them and not remove them from her life. At least, my heart is determined to believe it based on how nurturing she is with her kids.

 

[Minivanessa]

1 hour ago, IntoTheMystic said:

I went on a couple of those ATI approved 'Journey to the Heart' brainwashings back in the day when I was a teenager. I think they might have been called something different. I don't really remember. My parents, for reasons I will never know, bought into Gothard and Quiverfull and ATI. The majority of my extended family, while religious, never took it to that level of crazy. I've always maintained that if my parents had read L. Ron Hubbard first they would have raised me in Scientology. If they'd met Jim Jones before Gothard . . . we'd all be dead. THAT is what I think of Quiverfull and IBLP/ATI. They're cults to me just like Jim Jones and Scientology. (Sorry if there are Scientology folk here.)

I don't like to talk about it too much. What I went through being a lesbian teenager in that culture was a living hell. It was drilled into my head that my life and afterlife would both be full of agony, suffering, and misery. I was told I would literally be repeatedly murdered daily in hell for being gay. Going back to that in my mind tends to make me want to gnaw open my wrists and take a hot bath. 

I will say this about Jessa. I love that Spurgeon the Sturgeon is talking about Peter Rabbit. If she was fully committed to ATI and IBLP and Gothard's teachings, she would not be wasting time with Peter Rabbit. Stuff like that is considered worldly and full of hidden messages from Satan and bad people and demons. Gothard railed against Disney and Saturday cartoons with an iron fist. Anything that didn't have a message about God was deemed unfit. Cartoons encouraged kids to believe in 'fantasy' and 'witchcraft' and higher powers than God himself like Ninja Turtles and Transformers and Inspector Gadget. We were told that all of that stuff, anything that made kids feel hero worship or even just enjoy freakin' Fred Flintstone, took away from God's word. We didn't have a television. I got hooked on a Soap Opera called Santa Barbara and would visit my non-religious aunt on weekends under the guise of having a job and we'd watch all the weekly eps she had taped every Saturday. Then she would give me cash to make it seem like I was paid for a job. I learned about life watching that soap. And when I was banished . . . that aunt and her husband took me in, paid for my education, and accepted me. 

I think Jessa genuinely loves her kids enough to let them be kids. I really do. And I think her motherly instinct, just based on what I've seen, is strong enough for her to fight for her kids if the church tried to turn on them. I think she would leave with them and not remove them from her life. At least, my heart is determined to believe it based on how nurturing she is with her kids.

 

Damn, @IntoTheMystic, I'm so sorry for all the hell those a-holes put you through. Bless your aunt and her husband for helping you. Thanks for sharing your experience and insight. We on the outside have some idea of what the Gothard/ATI/IBLP cult preaches, but there's nothing like hearing it from a former insider.

It doesn't surprise me - although it's good to have it confirmed - that GotHard ranted against anything that didn't have a message about God. I wasn't charmed by the Duggars for a single minute the first time I ever heard of them and their TLC show. I've known too many evangelicals to be taken in by the Duggars' "we're so wholesome and holy" act. (Though it's not my religion, via both parents I'm descended from and related to a boatload of Baptists, who are mainstream, hardworking, educated, and not in the Gothardites/ATI/IBLP kind of thing.) I have some sense of who's generally sincerely religious vs. who's gone around the bend into fanatic territory. But obviously I don't have the inside scoop on the Gothard teachings.

I really appreciate your explaining the significance of something as apparently innocuous as Spurgeon talking about Peter Rabbit. When you understand the context of how Jessa was reared, it really is hopeful. I can only contrast it with the cringeworthy videos of that poor toddler Izzy being hammered at to recite a Bible verse.

Good for Jessa. And, thanks again.

Edited August 11, 2018 by Jeeves

[Zahdii]

2 hours ago, IntoTheMystic said:

I went on a couple of those ATI approved 'Journey to the Heart' brainwashings back in the day when I was a teenager...

I don't like to talk about it too much. What I went through being a lesbian teenager in that culture was a living hell. It was drilled into my head that my life and afterlife would both be full of agony, suffering, and misery. I was told I would literally be repeatedly murdered daily in hell for being gay...

I got hooked on a Soap Opera called Santa Barbara and would visit my non-religious aunt on weekends under the guise of having a job and we'd watch all the weekly eps she had taped every Saturday. Then she would give me cash to make it seem like I was paid for a job. I learned about life watching that soap. And when I was banished . . . that aunt and her husband took me in, paid for my education, and accepted me. 

I think Jessa genuinely loves her kids enough to let them be kids. I really do. And I think her motherly instinct, just based on what I've seen, is strong enough for her to fight for her kids if the church tried to turn on them. I think she would leave with them and not remove them from her life. At least, my heart is determined to believe it based on how nurturing she is with her kids.
 

I'm so sorry that you suffered during your childhood, and am glad you made it out.  I'm sending you the biggest internet hug you could ever imagine.  Your aunt and uncle were lifesavers, and I wish every child could have someone like them in their lives.  I'm sending them a big hug, too, although I suspect that they'd just pass it on to you because they recognized what your parents couldn't:  that you were more worthy of love, affection, and respect than any cult.

Gothard is an evil man who created a cult purely for his own benefit.  He could wrap himself up in the trappings of his false religion and live a life of wealth while preying on the young girls of his followers.  He picked out passages of the Bible to back up his 'teachings', and created from his own sick imagination the principals and rules that his believers should follow.  It worked out pretty good for him.  Until recently, he got a lot of money, respect, and undeserved adulation from his people.  He's still doing pretty well, although I bet he's pissed that so many people now pretend they 'follow the message, not the man'.

Ma and Pa Duggar are like him in some respects.  They picked and chose Bible verses and formed beliefs not backed up by fact or logic.  They found that by forcing their older children to parent the younger children they had more time to play around and even got a TV show out of it.  When their piss poor handling of Joshgate came to light, they lost a lot of the perks they once had, but they still have enough devotees to give them some comfort and keep them hoping that they will overcome their current PR difficulties and find a way to get back on top again.

It's no wonder that Jessa is such an accomplished Cafeteria Christian.  She's just doing what she saw her parents and Gothard doing.

[queenanne]

16 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Foretaste?

Jessa doesn't know it because she's been reading or anything, don't worry!  It's the second line of a famous hymn:

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!

O what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blessed_Assurance

[Barb23]

19 hours ago, Libby96 said:

Good for Jessa for choosing a quality program for her children, but why are Jill and Jessa "homeschooling" when their kids are barely three (is Spurgie even 3 yet)?  Why can't you just read to your kid, converse with them, have some quality toys around, let them color and draw, maybe practice letters and wordplay if they are interested?  Kids that age learn by playing and doing.  A lot of formal instruction is not needed.  In fact, it can be counterproductive.

Plus Jill has Izzy expecting a bag of treats like gummy bears when he finishes something.  He'll be expecting treats after every lesson.  Not a good  thing.  I realize treats work for some things like potty training & at times you have to indulge in bribes but I think Izzy will grow up thinking this is part of "school" if she continues. 

[ginger90]

The reason I never cared for food as a reward was, the opposite would be withholding it as punishment. That doesn’t seem like a good thing.

[IntoTheMystic]

Thank you, Jeeves and Zahdii. The only Journey to the Heart that ever happened to me ... was my family and church grabbing hold of mine and squeezing it until it shattered. Life was crap for me back then, but now I'm living a great life. My wife and I have adopted a bunch of little ones who keep up busy and proud and happy and just ... fine. I feel like I'm able to see a bigger picture and look at stuff from a lot of different perspectives because of what happened to me and that's my silver lining.

 

On 8/11/2018 at 3:49 PM, ginger90 said:

The reason I never cared for food as a reward was, the opposite would be withholding it as punishment. That doesn’t seem like a good thing.

I can confirm that food is regularly used as a reward and a punishment, especially if you are Quiverfull. If you misbehave, you aren't fed. I can't tell you how often my parents and the church tried to "starve my demon" ... like, I'd get hungry enough to be straight. Oh, I got hungry enough to say it, just not to BE IT. It was also used with little kids who wouldn't share, or would take stuff from other kids, or wouldn't sit down and listen to bible studies. Everyone else would get a snack, but the kid who didn't behave would be put in charge of passing out napkins and would then be forced to stand and watch everyone else eat. They also used water vs. juice/cola with us. Or they'd go out of their way to make the good kids some homemade milkshakes or ice cream. The bad kids would be in charge of turning the ice cream crank or dipping the sweet stuff into cups but would get nothing for themselves. This was especially effective if they didn't realize it until they were dipping the last bit into a bowl or cup and realized there was none left for them. "Jesus must have taken your portion as punishment for this or that." I got so tired of hearing "Jesus took it." 

I mention the above because I could see Jill doing this with her kids, but I don't see Jessa doing it. I don't think she would EVER let her babies go to bed hungry or take a treat away from one to give to the other. As surprised as I am to say it, Jessa truly seems like the best mom out of the bunch so far. I confess that when she was first courting and then married and even on her honeymoon when she was too good to try stuff, but would try to force Ben to do it, I was hoping she'd be sterile for a few years so she could grow up. However, she has surprised me. I think I actually saw the change in her happen when she first held Spurge in her arms and heard him cry. And even though she did him a BAD disservice with that name and it could be argued that anyone who would saddle a kid with such a cruel moniker must hate that child ... hehehe ... I think she's actually kinda in awe of her boys and super proud to be their mom. 

Edited August 12, 2018 by IntoTheMystic
I wanted to make the distinction of being Quiverfull since that's my experience. And I can't speel toediy.

[Marigold]

Just when I say something positive about Jessa and her choice of homeschool methods, she posts a "Look At Me"  post when Jinger just had a baby.

I don't think Jessa is deliberately trying to be mean but you can see how damaged she is...she HAS to attract attention to herself.  So insecure.  Guess that what happens when you are simply a number out of 19 kids. 

Not to mention, she lacks self awareness and social skills.  It looks petty and competitive.  Her siblings and Ben must get sick of that attitude. 

[DragonFaerie]

41 minutes ago, IntoTheMystic said:

This was especially effective if they didn't realize it until they were dipping the last bit into a bowl or cup and realized there was none left for them. "Jesus must have taken your portion as punishment for this or that." I got so tired of hearing "Jesus took it." 

While I didn't grow up "fundie", I did grow up with a religiously fanatical mother that would do things like this.  I developed a milk allergy at 9, thankfully I grew out of it, but had to go to friend's birthday parties and sit there while the kids ate ice cream and I couldn't have any.  Instead of my mother either letting them know I had an allergy or even just dropping me off with something like a fruitcicle and tell them I couldn't have ice cream, my mother would tell me that God has given me this challenge and my suffering will make me a better person.  That this is what God wants.  Screw you mother!

On August 10, 2018 at 7:44 PM, DangerousMinds said:

Foretaste?

For some reason, I saw Foretaste and yet read Foreskin and then realized Foretaste and I'll be in the prayer closet with the wine.

On August 11, 2018 at 4:02 AM, Mollie said:

Well, this is what we have come to expect from Jessa, isn't it?  Her sister has a baby and Jessa makes that event all about Jessa:  Hey, look at me!  See how my baby looked two years ago!  I had a baby before Jinger did!  I taught Jinger parenting skills and let her practice on my baby!

Remember when Jessa posted 100 additional pictures from her wedding (nine months earlier) on the weekend of cousin Amy's wedding?  I do.

Jessa is incapable of letting someone else be the center of attention.

Is she trying to be Me'chelle?  Just like Me'chelle's behavior at each of her daughter's wedding getting in the way and wanting all the attention on her.  Jessa needs to wake up and realize she's becoming her mother.

29 minutes ago, Marigold said:

Just when I say something positive about Jessa and her choice of homeschool methods, she posts a "Look At Me"  post when Jinger just had a baby.

I don't think Jessa is deliberately trying to be mean but you can see how damaged she is...she HAS to attract attention to herself.  So insecure.  Guess that what happens when you are simply a number out of 19 kids. 

Not to mention, she lacks self awareness and social skills.  It looks petty and competitive.  Her siblings and Ben must get sick of that attitude. 

Yes!  So well said @Marigold.  She totally comes off as petty, competitive and barely any social skills above Jilly Bean.

Also @IntoTheMystic You are an amazingly strong person to have gone through that and come from all of that.  Your strength just inspires me and makes me in awe of you.

[SMama]

On 8/10/2018 at 6:52 PM, HooHooHoo said:

Oh god, I read this as “taste”. ?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[Madtown]

Cranky Henry not wanting to wake up. He also apparently doesn't sleep in a crib...

[GeeGolly]

9 minutes ago, Madtown said:

Cranky Henry not wanting to wake up. He also apparently doesn't sleep in a crib...

I'm sorry, but has Monday been any different than any other day for Jessa?

[bigskygirl]

7 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm sorry, but has Monday been any different than any other day for Jessa?

Ha! I was thinking the same thing.

[DangerousMinds]

20 minutes ago, Madtown said:

Cranky Henry not wanting to wake up. He also apparently doesn't sleep in a crib...

How is her Monday different from any other day of the week?

[queenanne]

Did he say "I'm not"?  LOL

[dargosmydaddy]

13 minutes ago, queenanne said:

Did he say "I'm not"?  LOL

I heard, "Not yet."

[BitterApple]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm sorry, but has Monday been any different than any other day for Jessa?

Right? Usually Monday in most households means one or both spouses getting ready to leave for work and sending kids off to school. There's time crunches and stress, which is why most of us dread it. Jessa and Bin have no such obligations. They get up when they want, get dressed when they want, float by the TTH when they want, eat when they want etc. Monday is no different for them than Saturday or Sunday. Jessa's just trying to be super relatable and she's failing miserably.

[GeeGolly]

Are those grimy crib mattresses leaning on the wall in the corner of the room?

[SMama]

Why not use the second bedroom for the boys?

[doodlebug]

56 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Are those grimy crib mattresses leaning on the wall in the corner of the room?

They look crib sized and it looks like the wooden headboard of a crib behind them.  Maybe Henry’s crib was in their room initially and they took it down to move it to the other bedroom?  Of course, that means Henry didn’t have a usable bed to sleep in the night before, no wonder he’s crabby.

[lookeyloo]

My guess is they co-sleep which might explain the messy sheets and spit up in the bed they showed last season. 

[louannems]

Maybe they have The Family Bed and they always all sleep together?  Good, and only, birth control!

[BitterApple]

My guess is Jessa keeps Henry in the bed so Bin can't hey-hey-hey and make a third blessing. 

[Totally]

Why does he need to wake up?

Cant snark on the co sleeping, whatever works for parents to get a good nights sleep.

[Nysha]

Grumpy, sleepy Henry is adorable!

Also, why is Ben wearing a dress shirt? I thought his main job was washing toilets for JB?

[Zella]

2 minutes ago, Nysha said:

Grumpy, sleepy Henry is adorable!

Also, why is Ben wearing a dress shirt? I thought his main job was washing toilets for JB?

Maybe Derick's First Day of Law School Suit inspired him? 

[madpsych78]

I did LOL at Henry's "Not yet." Honestly, I'd probably say the same thing if I was groggy and in the process of waking up.

It looks like Henry's hair is starting to curl a little bit, although not to the same degree as Spurge.

[Bridget]

6 hours ago, Madtown said:

Cranky Henry not wanting to wake up. He also apparently doesn't sleep in a crib...

I really hope Jessa was joking about Henry having a late night last night. Just because she grew up on Duggar Time and stayed up until Late O'Clock for her entire life, I hope she realizes that kids need to be on a sleep schedule. I know the boys take naps, but that doesn't make up for lost sleep at night.

I don't know how Co-Sleeping works except for the part where everyone sleeps together in the same bed. Do the kids go to bed at a decent hour, the parents stay up later and then join the kid(s) in bed? 

Edited August 14, 2018 by Bridget

[Absolom]

10 hours ago, Nysha said:

Also, why is Ben wearing a dress shirt? I thought his main job was washing toilets for JB?

The TLC plotline from one episode that will not die.  I keep hoping it will RIP.

[lookeyloo]

22 minutes ago, Absolom said:

The TLC plotline from one episode that will not die.  I keep hoping it will RIP.

Me too!  We don't really know what Ben does in the daytime.  He could have a real J.O.B.  Well, just maybe.  Or is taking classes.  He does seem to like his clothes.  A little bit like Jeremy, eh.  

[BitterApple]

I don't think Bin does much of anything. They live off the show money and he takes online classes. That's about it. 

[beagletime]

10 hours ago, Bridget said:

I really hope Jessa was joking about Henry having a late night last night. Just because she grew up on Duggar Time and stayed up until Late O'Clock for her entire life, I hope she realizes that kids need to be on a sleep schedule. I know the boys take naps, but that doesn't make up for lost sleep at night.

I don't know how Co-Sleeping works except for the part where everyone sleeps together in the same bed. Do the kids go to bed at a decent hour, the parents stay up later and then join the kid(s) in bed? 

In the comments of her post, Jessa said during the night Henry got into bed with them.  Jessa and Ben had gotten up and Henry was still asleep in their bed.  I do like the way Ben gently rubbed his back.  I may not agree with their fundamentalist beliefs but they do seem to be gentle and loving with their sons. And truly enjoy them. 

[3 is enough]

12 hours ago, Nysha said:

Also, why is Ben wearing a dress shirt? I thought his main job was washing toilets for JB?

Jessa has talked about Ben going to work in the past.  It is entirely possible that he does have a part time job somewhere that requires him to wear nicer clothing. It isn't entirely out of the realm of possibility that he has some sort of entry level office job- he did get an associate's degree a couple of years ago.  And that his employer was not on board with cameras being present at their place of business, so it is simply not mentioned. I'm sure they get the shooting schedule ahead of time and he can arrange his shifts accordingly. I really think Jessa is shrewd enough to realize that they need as much money coming in as possible.  Even on the off chance that Jim Bob does not control the money from the show, the number of married couples and adult single Duggars that would get some sort of compensation is growing, so each couple's chunk of the TLC pie is really not that big.

Edited August 14, 2018 by 3 is enough

[xwordfanatik]

17 hours ago, bigskygirl said:

Ha! I was thinking the same thing.

So true.  She's never had to get up with an alarm clock, when it's still dark out, shower, fix that hair, get dressed, and drive to some crap (or even a good) job!  WTH do you know what Mondays are like, in the real heathen world?

Henry is so cute.  

[MonicaM]

27 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

So true.  She's never had to get up with an alarm clock, when it's still dark out, shower, fix that hair, get dressed, and drive to some crap (or even a good) job!  WTH do you know what Mondays are like, in the real heathen world?

Henry is so cute.  

The day to day routine is what most of us start learning starting with preschool or kindergarten.  I can't imagine a life where you have NEVER had to consistently pull yourself together and function no matter how you feel.  Part of me thinks that would be a luxury, but even though it can be a pain sometimes, I don't know that I would trade.  JB and his bride have done an excellent job making sure their offspring are incapable of functioning in the real adult world.

[galaxychaser]

Henry omg so fat and cute. Why wake his chubby self. Let him sleep.

I wish I had friends with kids...

[3 is enough]

Seriously though, how much money do Jessa and Ben need to support themselves and their sons?  Do they pay rent?  Or are they just expected to pay for the property taxes on their house?  Even if the cost of living in Arkansas is relatively low, you would need at least $30,000 a year to support 4 people, and I think that is a low estimate.  They do seem to go out and travel a lot.  I realize that some outings are on the TLC dime, but even so, bringing up a family is not cheap.

And speaking of cheap, Jim Bob is famous for being a huge cheapskate.  I just can't see him willingly supporting or supplementing any or all of his 7 (soon to be 8) married kids and their spouses and children.  He still has 11 kids at home to support.  I know he has money stashed away, but supporting his mega family plus 8 other households just does not add up. My guess is that he does charge the married kids rent on their homes.  

The only kid I can see him grudgingly helping is Josh, because he pretty much has no options.  Cheap as he is, I doubt Jim Bob would let any of his kids starve.

Honestly, I really think Ben has some sort of job.  I just can't see how they could manage otherwise.

[Loves2Dance]

On 8/11/2018 at 9:14 AM, IntoTheMystic said:

I went on a couple of those ATI approved 'Journey to the Heart' brainwashings back in the day when I was a teenager. I think they might have been called something different. I don't really remember. My parents, for reasons I will never know, bought into Gothard and Quiverfull and ATI. The majority of my extended family, while religious, never took it to that level of crazy. I've always maintained that if my parents had read L. Ron Hubbard first they would have raised me in Scientology. If they'd met Jim Jones before Gothard . . . we'd all be dead. THAT is what I think of Quiverfull and IBLP/ATI. They're cults to me just like Jim Jones and Scientology. (Sorry if there are Scientology folk here.)

I don't like to talk about it too much. What I went through being a lesbian teenager in that culture was a living hell. It was drilled into my head that my life and afterlife would both be full of agony, suffering, and misery. I was told I would literally be repeatedly murdered daily in hell for being gay. Going back to that in my mind tends to make me want to gnaw open my wrists and take a hot bath. 

I will say this about Jessa. I love that Spurgeon the Sturgeon is talking about Peter Rabbit. If she was fully committed to ATI and IBLP and Gothard's teachings, she would not be wasting time with Peter Rabbit. Stuff like that is considered worldly and full of hidden messages from Satan and bad people and demons. Gothard railed against Disney and Saturday cartoons with an iron fist. Anything that didn't have a message about God was deemed unfit. Cartoons encouraged kids to believe in 'fantasy' and 'witchcraft' and higher powers than God himself like Ninja Turtles and Transformers and Inspector Gadget. We were told that all of that stuff, anything that made kids feel hero worship or even just enjoy freakin' Fred Flintstone, took away from God's word. We didn't have a television. I got hooked on a Soap Opera called Santa Barbara and would visit my non-religious aunt on weekends under the guise of having a job and we'd watch all the weekly eps she had taped every Saturday. Then she would give me cash to make it seem like I was paid for a job. I learned about life watching that soap. And when I was banished . . . that aunt and her husband took me in, paid for my education, and accepted me. 

I think Jessa genuinely loves her kids enough to let them be kids. I really do. And I think her motherly instinct, just based on what I've seen, is strong enough for her to fight for her kids if the church tried to turn on them. I think she would leave with them and not remove them from her life. At least, my heart is determined to believe it based on how nurturing she is with her kids.

 

I just wanted to offer some virtual hugs and thank you for sharing your story with us. It's really brave and I'm so glad your aunt and her husband were a soft place for you to land. 

[Absolom]

28 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Seriously though, how much money do Jessa and Ben need to support themselves and their sons?  Do they pay rent?  Or are they just expected to pay for the property taxes on their house? 

They own the house so no they don't pay rent and I expect they pay the property tax.

[Lunera]

I wonder if they got paid for making that appearance at the camp, a few weeks ago. 

[Minivanessa]

37 minutes ago, Lunera said:

I wonder if they got paid for making that appearance at the camp, a few weeks ago. 

I'm sure they did. Duggars get love offerings, they don't give them.