Jump to content
Forums forums
PRIMETIMER

Zahdii

Member
  • Content Count

    2.0k
  • Joined

Community Reputation

9.3k Excellent
  1. If you don't have sex that often, maybe you can. I worked with a woman who knew exactly when she got pregnant. When she found out where I lived, she laughed and said that her child was concieved on the living room floor of the apartment next to me. Her boyfriend had gotten a short term job out of town and was gone for a couple of months. When he returned, they renewed their relationship in the expected way, during the late night news while waiting for The Tonight Show to start. Whatever they used for birth control either failed or they never used it at all that night. The n
  2. I'm amused by the conversation about states that don't allow people to pump their own gas. I've lived in Oregon since before I learned to drive, and I've never pumped my own gas. Every time I go out of state and I go to a gas station, I ask the attendant or another customer to show me how to do it. I think I could probably work it out, but once people find out I've never pumped my own gas before, they seem reluctant to be the one to "break the streak".
  3. Phones aren't the only way to make home movies. There's also camcorders and video recorders, and 8mm cameras. My mom has a cute 8mm clip of me trying to dance the twist with my dad in 1966. And another one of me standing in my home sewn tiger costume for Halloween. Mom was trying to get me to do the whole pretend clawing and growling thing, but I was having none of it. As she tells it, I did it once so she got out the camera, and I was suspicious of what was happening so I wouldn't do it again. All of my siblings standing behind her growling and swiping the air with their fingers m
  4. As long as the drawer is sturdy, it's not a problem with a very young baby. I had a friend who babysat her cousin's baby and tried that. The kid was a chunky thing, and strong. He wasn't old enough to sit up, but he might have been old enough to roll over, and there was no room in the drawer to do that. When he woke up he kicked the crap out of that drawer. I helped her try to put it back together again, but the tiny little nails wouldn't hold it together. We had to glue it, but the glue didn't work well, and I think we didn't glue it up square. Anyway, the drawer was useless af
  5. I just saw an ad on Pluto TV that I had to look up online to make sure I heard what I thought I heard. Apparently a good opening line to a conversation in a bar (after "Do you come here often?" fails) is for a woman to sashay up to a man and ask him "Did you just shave your balls and B-hole?" Enjoy:
  6. Is that 84 people, or 84 thousand? And what does the snake icon mean?
  7. Doubt it. It took me years to realize there's a Jason, but I'm pretty sure there's not a Jeremy. And I'm pretty sure I've been aware of the Duggars a lot longer than Jeremy was. Maybe it's meant to be the Voluomos' (however it's spelled, I can't be bothered to look it up) first name's initials. But the douche couldn't remember his wife's first name wasn't Duggar.
  8. Taking to Small Talk. Oops. Never mind, there's no Small Talk for this, so I'll just say it here: Same here. I once (back in the 90's) borrowed my MIL's Subaru and drove it to run errands. Coming out of the pharmacy, I went to her car and got in. The key unlocked the door, and fit in the ignition, but the engine wouldn't turn over. Then I saw a man running up to the car. "Ma'am! You're in the wrong car! That's my car. Your car is right there." He pointed to my right. Yep two red Subarus were parked next to each other. But as I was getting out of his car, I realized that t
  9. The dying man is saying "Ti ho sempre amata, mia cara. Non I'ho mai detto ma sto morendo." It's Italian, I guess. Google translates it to "I've always loved you, my dear. I never said that but I'm dying."
  10. I put some cookies in when I was a teen. Got first place! That was a good year. I took first for my cookies, my quilt, and my embroidery.
  11. No. It's just a little Alcatel flip phone. But I think this is supposed to go to Small Talk
  12. There was a commercial years ago where a young couple are sitting in a boat on a lake. Suddenly they look down and water is bubbling up between them. Will they be able to row back to shore before they get wet? Suddenly the woman gets an idea and opens her purse, pops out a tampon and holds it up as she unwraps it. Sticking it in the hole, the water stops and they smile at each other, apparently under the impression that there's no longer any hurry to cut their boat ride short.
  13. I finally got a cell phone, but it's a little flip phone that doesn't access the internet. Should I suddenly decide to fly off somewhere, how will I prove I have a seat on the plane?
  14. Glen, of Glen and Friends Cooking, loves Marmite. He won't eat it by itself or on a slice of toast, but adds a dollup to soups, stews, casseroles, etc. He says it can't be tasted in the dish, but it elevates the other ingredients to heights of glory! (He isn't quite that enthusiastic, 😉.) Check him out on YouTube sometime. He also has a home brewing channel.
×
×
  • Create New...

Customize font-size