The Duggalos: Jinger and the Holy Goalie

[NotthebadVictoria]

16 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Seriously, if they name this baby Hope and pimp out her arrival to sell their shitty little book they will zoom to the number one spot on the ALL-TIME DUGGAR ASSHOLE Hall of Fame for all eternity, supplanting both Smuggar and Ma and Pa, who started this whole nightmare.

Honestly I will be shocked if Hope is not her name! 

[MaryAnneSpier]

Nah, Ma and Pa will always hold the number one spot for me for Duggar Assholes. They had more children than any responsible person should have, just to feed the patriarch's ego while living off charity from the church because he spent 250K on a failed political position. While the eldest girls were busy raising their younger siblings, their eldest brother molested them, was caught numerous times, and was still allowed to live at home with them instead of getting real help and sent away to protect the rest. With all this going on, Ma and Pa decided to pimp out their children's lives for all to see on TV, while selling a false "aw shucks, we're just an old-fashioned family" persona, and making more babies. They deprived their children, particularly their girls, from any real education and independence. Yeah, they're second on my shit list only to Jill Rodriguez and her husband.

[Misslindsey]

1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

🙄

How many times was it mentioned that they're the BREAKOUT STARS???? 

Hee! Don't forget Felicity, who apparently has captured the hearts of their fans everywhere! I could not stop rolling my eyes reading their book synopsis. 

[Totally]

2 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

Maybe $1 I’d buy it 

Not even for a $1, it will all be a rehash of what they’ve already put online 

Edited November 18, 2020 by Totally

[Snow Fairy]

The only book about the Duggars worth reading would be the one telling all the family secrets, from someone who escaped the "marriage-popping babies" thing

[Churchhoney]

10 hours ago, emmawoodhouse said:

🙄

How many times was it mentioned that they're the BREAKOUT STARS???? 

Well, they said it enough times to make their publisher believe it's true. Their publisher also buys the crap about the valuable assistance Jingle provides to Diana's charity. 

The hope they hold is that a lot of people will believe the lies, I guess

Such Christian charity they embody. 

[ginger90]

I was reminded of this clip with the book discussion:

 

 

[Churchhoney]

Worthy looks to be a regular publisher -- not vanity, where you pay someone to publish your books -- of Christian inspirational stuff of many kinds. Between about 2010 and 2018, when Hatchette bought them, Worthy went on a tear buying up a lot of other Christian book (and gift) companies, including parts of  Guideposts and Ideals. 

Below is a little blurb about them, showing mainly that they do a very wide range of Christian stuff. Worthy does have a lot of the big-name Christian names, including Jerry Jenkins (co-author with Tim La Haye of the Left Behind series) and John Hagee (Mr. Second Coming, anti-Catholic, anti-Muslim, support-Israel-because-Jesus 'prophet" nutbar) --

Blurb -- "Worthy is an inspirational adult and children’s book publisher specializing in Christian authors and bestselling nonfiction and fiction books. Worthy focuses on a boutique list of books across a broad spectrum: inspiration, fiction, Bible study, current events, devotion, leadership, and much more."

They're Tennessee-based. And now Hatchette has a group of imprints based in Nashville, of which they are one. 

Here's the Worthy website -- https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/imprint/hachette-nashville/worthy-books/

The good news is that almost literally nobody makes much money selling a book. .... (I'm sure Jer figures this will be part of the empire he's building. But so far the parts of the empire he's already got don't look too impressive. )

And they have some stiff competition in the "couples and family books" category (likely a growing one) at Worthy.....Take a gander at this competitor-- They have a story. 

Beautifully Broken: An Unlikely Journey of Faith Hardcover – October 13, 2020

by Paige Wetzel  (Author), Josh Wetzel  (Author)

5.0 out of 5 stars    33 ratings

"Restore your faith in love and family with one Army wife's courageous story of how she helped her husband recuperate from losing both of his legs while serving in Afghanistan.

"Paige received the phone call that every military wife prays will never come. Her husband, Army Sergeant Josh Wetzel, stepped on an improvised explosive device while patrolling in Afghanistan. The blast resulted in the immediate loss of his legs. His survival was uncertain, and in the days to come, this traumatic incident began an unbelievable journey of faith for them as a couple.

"Paige's vulnerability as she struggles physically, emotionally, and spiritually, will remind you of the power of commitment and love in the face of adversity. You will discover the bravery and grit of a woman who stood behind the battle lines but faced a battle of her own to save her marriage and her family. As a military wife, Paige had to come to terms with the priorities of the military: God, Country, and then Family."

https://www.amazon.com/Beautifully-Broken-Unlikely-Journey-Faith/dp/1546034528/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=beautifully+broken&qid=1605706515&sr=8-1

I'm waiting to see you try to top that, Mr. Breakout Star. The day you had to settle for donut-shop coffee because the line was too long at the gourmet place won't do it, I'm thinking. 

Call me crazy. But I think that before you start trying to "influence" everybody, and give counsel in podcasts and sermons and speeches, and write autobiographies and advice tomes, it's a good idea to have learned something, experienced something and accomplished something. Preferably numerous somethings. 

Of course these two come from cultures where 16-year-old boys regularly sermonize and 20-year-olds who've been married a year present conference sessions on the successful Christian marriage. So obviously they must understand something I don't. 

Edited November 18, 2020 by Churchhoney

[Churchhoney]

23 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

I was reminded of this clip with the book discussion:

 

 

Well, TLC is sure trolling Mr. Pretentious and Stupid and his in-law morons. But since they get some bucks from it I guess none of them even notices. 

[laurakaye]

Gosh, I've been married 29 years.  I wonder what I could learn from a smarmy know-it-all and his emotionally stunted bride?  How to order the perfect cup of pretentious coffee?  The proper care and folding of pocket squares?  How to pimp out a toddler for fun and profit?  The Vespa and Suits From the 70's - A Retrospective?  Book collecting for people who don't read?  How to perfect the vapid yet adoring headship gaze?  I could go on but I think I'll pass on whatever cookie cutter advice these two give.

[NotthebadVictoria]

3 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Gosh, I've been married 29 years.  I wonder what I could learn from a smarmy know-it-all and his emotionally stunted bride?  How to order the perfect cup of pretentious coffee?  The proper care and folding of pocket squares?  How to pimp out a toddler for fun and profit?  The Vespa and Suits From the 70's - A Retrospective?  Book collecting for people who don't read?  How to perfect the vapid yet adoring headship gaze?  I could go on but I think I'll pass on whatever cookie cutter advice these two give.

Well, they did have a miscarriage, so they have endured more than any other couple in the history of the world. Glad they can help us folk to do the same 🤣

[iwantcookies]

We are breakout stars and you lowly heathens aren’t so there 

-Jeremy Vuolo while sipping $5 latte 

[debbie311]

Why is it in every picture (practically), Jinger has to put her hands on her belly to remind us all that she is pregnant?  And not just Jinger, all of them do it. Who does that in real life? Is it just me?

[Oldernowiser]

On 11/17/2020 at 6:26 AM, laurakaye said:

Mr. Pretentious McPensivePants in these "candid" moments picking up his vanilla almond milk latte, extra foam, extra shot of espresso, extra hot, extra everything (because you know this man's order is as persnickety as it could possibly be and still be considered "coffee").

True story. Mr. Wiser and I were sitting outside at a Starbucks a couple of years ago near the drive through. We were laughing at all of the “poodle drinks” people were ordering (we had a barista friend who called them that)...then someone pulled in and launched into what had to be a full minute poodle drink order. It just went on forever. There was a pause...and the Starbucks order taker said, without even a hint of sarcasm, “Did you want coffee in that?” We laughed until we cried.

[Oldernowiser]

1 hour ago, laurakaye said:

Gosh, I've been married 29 years.  I wonder what I could learn from a smarmy know-it-all and his emotionally stunted bride? 

Well, sure, but do you have a “silver thread of hope” woven throughout everything in your lives?

🤮

[TigerLily20]

34 minutes ago, debbie311 said:

Why is it in every picture (practically), Jinger has to put her hands on her belly to remind us all that she is pregnant?  And not just Jinger, all of them do it. Who does that in real life? Is it just me?

...sigh....my sister, who is in her mid 20's does this in....every.picture.she.takes.........she is due in about a month and I will never be so glad when I don't have to see this pose at least once a day (that's a rant for another day...why do we need pictures of people every day.....)

[Turquoise]

43 minutes ago, debbie311 said:

Why is it in every picture (practically), Jinger has to put her hands on her belly to remind us all that she is pregnant?  And not just Jinger, all of them do it. Who does that in real life? Is it just me?

That has become A Thing now...also pics from the side, with them pensively staring at their belly and their hand underneath "the bump".

[BigBingerBro]

I am also so sick of this "Breakout Stars" thing.   HOW are they breakout stars?  What have they done in the entertainment/hollywood scene that qualifies them to use that title so generously?  They are still on the same show they were always on.  Does moving to LA and being papped equate to becoming stars??  I'm baffled, actually.

[Churchhoney]

10 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

I am also so sick of this "Breakout Stars" thing.   HOW are they breakout stars?  What have they done in the entertainment/hollywood scene that qualifies them to use that title so generously?  They are still on the same show they were always on.  Does moving to LA and being papped equate to becoming stars??  I'm baffled, actually.

One of them must have read "The Secret." ....Probably Jer. 😁

[Oldernowiser]

6 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

I am also so sick of this "Breakout Stars" thing.   HOW are they breakout stars?  What have they done in the entertainment/hollywood scene that qualifies them to use that title so generously?  They are still on the same show they were always on.  Does moving to LA and being papped equate to becoming stars??  I'm baffled, actually.

It’s the oldest trick in the PR/political world...say something often enough and people might start to believe it’s true. And their target audience isn’t exactly famous for their ability to objectively analyze, well, anything. 
My guess is they’ll pop out Hope, go on some kind of half-assed virtual book tour (bet RFP is cursing Covid right now), gain a few thousand followers and sell about that many books. The end.

[crazy8s]

the Breakout stars are now sharing the Counting On spotlight with at least 4 other duggar couples. plus Anna and kids and Jana. now add the teen Justin and Claire marriage. Add in also JB and michelle have wormed their way back into the show and take up minutes.

Failure to launch fundie style Jed, Jer, Jason, and James will announce courtship any old time now and dilute the minutes on the show even further.

there are no stars. just endless mediocrity

Edited November 18, 2020 by crazy8s

[beckie]

No baby yet? Isn't she over due now?

[laurakaye]

14 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

Failure to launch fundie style Jed, Jer, Jason, and James will announce courtship any old time now and dilute the minutes on the show even further.

I would totally watch "Failure to Launch: Fundie Edition" but I need the Bates boys to be in it too.  I want to see the Duggar boys dejectedly derf around town looking for love with their receding hairlines and poor posture, while the Bates dudebros strut their stuff in skintight jeans, muscle shirts and guns strapped to every limb.  First guy to land a helpmeet gets a shed from Jim Bob to live in and a job as a "car mechanic/toilet scrubber."

[iwantcookies]

The bates bots are cute but must have awful personality or bad breath or something that repels girls. 

[Oldernowiser]

21 minutes ago, beckie said:

No baby yet? Isn't she over due now?

Don’t they typically have the baby and then start auctioning off the blessed event coverage to the highest bidder? That seems to take a few days.

[crazy8s]

1 minute ago, Oldernowiser said:

Don’t they typically have the baby and then start auctioning off the blessed event coverage to the highest bidder? That seems to take a few days.

sad, but true

[Tikichick]

17 hours ago, madpsych78 said:

OMG

Of course Jer is most prominent on the cover. OF COURSE.

"Breakout stars" my ass. In terms of most screen time, the breakout stars are the Seewalds. In terms of most interesting lives, the breakout stars are the Dillards and they're not even on the show, FFS. 

I wonder how many photos they had to pick from before deciding to select one with Jeremy most prominently front and center?  Oh, wait, what am I saying, they ALL had Jeremy prominently front and center!

I guess it answers the question, what's more onbrand for this audience -- focus on the headship always, or see the promise of the future on display in the burgeoning belly of a clearly expecting mother?   Might I humbly suggest a producer question for next season's talking heads?   Let's see the  family's answers to which came first, the chicken or the egg?

 

[MargeGunderson]

2 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

The bates bots are cute but must have awful personality or bad breath or something that repels girls. 

I assume it’s in part Kelly.

[BigBingerBro]

2 hours ago, iwantcookies said:

The bates bots are cute but must have awful personality or bad breath or something that repels girls. 

It could also be profuse sweating.  I recall one of them had a literal sweat rag mopping his head and neck while working up the courage to ask a girl to court,  It was the most awkward thing ever.  I think she ended up dumping him but he eventually found another taker and is married now.  I'm not sure I don't keep up with them.

More on topic....  NO baby yet????  I am on the edge of my seat waiting to see what Jermy will wear for the baby reveal.

[iwantcookies]

A pocket square and a big toothy grin 

[BradandJanet]

Jinger should get first author position on that book because Jer has no name recognition without her. I'd insist on  Jinger Duggar Vuolo and Jeremy Vuolo, Breakout Stars (in their own minds) of TLC's Counting On. 

That doesn't fit their idea of a headship marriage, however. How sad. JimBob would like to see the Duggar name on the cover. 

[Churchhoney]

31 minutes ago, BradandJanet said:

Jinger should get first author position on that book because Jer has no name recognition without her. I'd insist on  Jinger Duggar Vuolo and Jeremy Vuolo, Breakout Stars (in their own minds) of TLC's Counting On. 

That doesn't fit their idea of a headship marriage, however. How sad. JimBob would like to see the Duggar name on the cover. 

JIm Bob would like the cover to say "One of Jim Bob Duggar's Very Many Daughters (and whatshisname)"

[PikaScrewChu]

Yeah I thought Jinger would be induced early like she was with Felicity. Although pandemic restrictions and all that in LA, I am going to assume they're told Jinger to wait until she's in labor. Unless they're doing a homebirth so Vuolo #2 gets a birth special. 

My bet is on Evangeline Diana or something like that as the name. 

[Temperance]

11 hours ago, beckie said:

No baby yet? Isn't she over due now?

No she is due November 19. If she hasn't had the baby by the very start November 20th, she is overdue. 

5 hours ago, PikaScrewChu said:

Yeah I thought Jinger would be induced early like she was with Felicity. Although pandemic restrictions and all that in LA, I am going to assume they're told Jinger to wait until she's in labor. Unless they're doing a homebirth so Vuolo #2 gets a birth special. 

My bet is on Evangeline Diana or something like that as the name. 

She was induced a day early with Felicity, so she should have been induced today. Maybe she was, maybe she wasn't. 

Felicity's birth was a smooth delivery; maybe they'll just wait until she goes into labor. 

[ginger90]

From Jeremy’s stories, he asks, what would you do?

[ouinason]

You know, that's an act of good ethics that I did not expect.

[NotthebadVictoria]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

From Jeremy’s stories, he asks, what would you do?

What am I missing? I am lost 

[QuinnInND]

33 minutes ago, NotthebadVictoria said:

What am I missing? I am lost 

His final exam question basically had the answers on the pen he was using. Just coincidence, but he told his professor that he basically had the answers on his pen instead of "cheating". Professor said he'd give Mr Pocketsquare half credit if he turned in the pen with the exam. Basically being honest is the best policy. 

[Churchhoney]

57 minutes ago, NotthebadVictoria said:

What am I missing? I am lost 

I doubt you're missing anything!

But just in case you are here's a short recap: Jer has a pen with the "Hear, Oh Israel, etc." passage from Deuteronomy printed on the side of it in Hebrew. (because of course he does...)

He was apparently writing his Hebrew exam with that pen. Turns out the extra-credit question was to write out that passage in Hebrew. 

Hence, Jer faced not just an ethical dilemma but an ethical dilemma with an apparent actual cost. If he's honest and admits he has a cylindrical cheat sheet in his hand, then he'll have to leave the extra-credit question blank and not get the credit! But if he cheats and checks his pen to make sure he gets the Hebrew right, he'll get those extra credit points! 

What shall he do? 

His sense of right and wrong prevails. He tells the prof about his pen.

And happy but ironically humorous ending. Prof says he can have half credit for the bonus question if he gives the prof his pen! 

Actually a better story than I've heard out of him. Ever. 

Extra-credit bonus question: Is his new ghostwriter teaching him how to tell anecdotes so his sermons stop being so deadly dull?  (Or so his book won't be so deadly dull?)

 

 

 

Edited November 19, 2020 by Churchhoney

[BigBingerBro]

I'm surpised he wasn't automatically failed for taking a photo during a test and posting it on social media.,

[Jeanne222]

How can he be in a graduate Master's program when he is NOT a decent public speaker?

Who's backing $$ this wannabe preacher of a zillion member church?

I dunno  if the Dugger name is big enough for all that with a guy that can't preach!  If he had the least amount of talent in public speaking...maybe.  But I listened to one of his sermons and wanted to jump out the window to get away!

[Churchhoney]

6 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

I'm surpised he wasn't automatically failed for taking a photo during a test and posting it on social media.,

There's probably an injunction against taking any such action against Jer.....since he's attending the seminary and living free of charge in LA because of his constant posting to large crowds on social media. 😁

Edited November 19, 2020 by Churchhoney

[NotthebadVictoria]

9 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

I doubt you're missing anything!

But just in case you are here's a short recap: Jer has a pen with the "Hear, Oh Israel, etc." passage from Deuteronomy printed on the side of it in Hebrew.

He was apparently writing his Hebrew exam with that pen. Turns out the extra-credit question was to write out that passage in Hebrew. 

Hence, Jer faced not just an ethical dilemma but an ethical dilemma with an apparent actual cost. If he's honest and admits he has a cylindrical cheat sheet in his hand, then he'll have to leave the extra-credit question blank and not get the credit! But if he cheats and checks his pen to make sure he gets the Hebrew right, he'll get those extra credit points! 

What shall he do? 

His sense of right and wrong prevails. He tells the prof about his pen.

And happy but ironically humorous ending. Prof says he can have half credit for the bonus question if he gives the prof his pen! 

Actually a better story than I've heard out of him. Ever. 

Extra-credit bonus question: Is his new ghostwriter teaching him how to tell anecdotes so his sermons stop being so deadly dull?  (Or so his book won't be so deadly dull?)

 

 

 

Ah!! Thank you! It’s been a morning, I thought he was saying the prof asked for them to translate their pens and I thought it odd to expect everyone to carry a fountain pen with Hebrew 🤣🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

[Churchhoney]

1 minute ago, Jeanne222 said:

 

Who's backing $$ this wannabe preacher of a zillion member church?

 

John MacArthur, founder and head of his seminary. After Jer's lengthy campaign of sucking up to JM and constantly telling him how many social-media and TeeVee fans he has. 

Apparently rewarding suckups in this way is a longtime habit for MacArthur. 

Just now, NotthebadVictoria said:

Ah!! Thank you! It’s been a morning, I thought he was saying the prof asked for them to translate their pens and I thought it odd to expect everyone to carry a fountain pen with Hebrew 🤣🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

I like your story even better! 

[ginger90]

2 minutes ago, NotthebadVictoria said:

Ah!! Thank you! It’s been a morning, I thought he was saying the prof asked for them to translate their pens and I thought it odd to expect everyone to carry a fountain pen with Hebrew 🤣🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

He’s a poor writer. The way he wrote it, it does come across that way.

[Churchhoney]

3 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

He’s a poor writer. The way he wrote it, it does come across that way.

Yep. His mediocre writing is another problem with his sermons, too. Along with his mediocre speaking abilities. ....

(I expect a total lack of sermon planning is another problem. But we don't actually have evidence of that...) 

I still think this is the best story he's ever told, though. Of course that could just be because it's the most interesting thing that's happened to him since he swam into my field of vision. 

Bodes well for the book if that's true. 😁

Edited November 19, 2020 by Churchhoney

[Absolom]

20 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

I dunno  if the Dugger name is big enough for all that with a guy that can't preach!  If he had the least amount of talent in public speaking...maybe.  But I listened to one of his sermons and wanted to jump out the window to get away!

He's probably at least average in the cohort of his school.  Sad to say most of their graduates are equally boring.

[Nysha]

33 minutes ago, Jeanne222 said:

How can he be in a graduate Master's program when he is NOT a decent public speaker?

Expository sermons tend to come across as a boring lecture, anyway, but being a decent public speaker is not a requirement for graduate-level degrees. One of the most boring preachers I ever listened to had a doctorate in theology and was the district superintendent over a 3 state district. He also turned out to be a pedophile, but I'm sure the two aren't related. 

[Future Cat Lady]

What I take from this story is that he takes his fancy expensive pens to school. He just looks like a show-off and a snob. 

Edited November 19, 2020 by Future Cat Lady

[laurakaye]

19 hours ago, Tikichick said:

I guess it answers the question, what's more onbrand for this audience -- focus on the headship always, or see the promise of the future on display in the burgeoning belly of a clearly expecting mother?   Might I humbly suggest a producer question for next season's talking heads?   Let's see the  family's answers to which came first, the chicken or the egg?

I'm kind of surprised that the Fundies haven't invented the pose of having the father squat down and stick his mug right next to the mother's huge belly, cropping the actual mother right out of the photo.  I mean that's what it's all about - the manly man-dude who is man enough to continually knock up his baby delivery system.

 

53 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

He’s a poor writer. The way he wrote it, it does come across that way.

But once you become captivated by the beautiful, rich, deep-blue ink flowing from the pretentious fountain pen, the words don't even really matter.

Edited November 19, 2020 by laurakaye