S20.E09: Week 9

[backformore]

Oh, my, how dramatic!   Ben is sitting, pensively looking toward the horizon (but facing the camera), trying to figure out how to ditch Caila.

Caila sneaks over, (well, she's driven by someone with the show)  , walks in the open door, through the villa, out the back - all with a camera  on her the whole time.  She sneaks up on Pensive Ben to surprise him in a spontaneous display, a goofy game of "guess who it is?"  and the camera that has been focused on Ben the whole time, catches the whole thing. 

 

Oh Ben!   Marry Caila - think of babies with gorgeous hair! 

[Artsda]

I thought maybe the commercials were making this episode worse than it was going to be. However, I just saw it and nope.

 

Ben sleeps with all 3 women and then declares love to 2 of them. One right after the next. Wow. Innocent sweet Ben, not so much as either.

 

I liked Caila for coming back out of the car, I thought she was trying to ask if he knew he didn't love her when he slept with her and Ben really went around the subject. He did know because she said ILY and he did not say it back like he did with the others. 

 

Jojo claiming her brothers would end up liking Ben? Umm not after seeing this episode, this will just enforce their hate even more! 

[econ07]

Self-respecting men and women seem to be going extinct.  

 

When will one woman tell the bachelor: "If you propose to me and I see that you have slept with other contestants, we're done."

[Lemons]

 

Obviously Little Ben started making the decisions once Jojo's breast implants came out to play. I also noticed the boner in the waterfalls. I'm trying to decide whether Ben's a complete idiot, a cad, or a masterful sociopath.

 

Do guys really like that?  They looked so "surgical." 

 

My guess would be that Ben is a complete idiot.  He's always come off as a little slow.

[violetr]

I'm reading this at face value and have decided that this poor dingaling really did go and fall in love with two ladies. Bless all their hearts. I think Lauren showed emotional maturity and intelligence when she shared that she thinks it's entirely possible to love two people at once. I never understood why so many people don't "believe" in that. Are our hearts really that stingy?

I like both remaining women and feel bad for whoever else gets hurt. This show is so not the way to start a healthy relationship.

I thought all the women looked really pretty. Caila and Lauren both had glowy skin, and JoJo was smokin' in that RC dress.

Most importantly: SEA TURTLES! Way to flippity flop into my heart, little guys! I actually own a turtle and they are awesome animals.

Edited March 1, 2016 by violetr

[Sayla Vee]

Lucky Caila.  She's my fav and I wanted her spared.  I hope she's not the next Bachelorette because I think that's such a tacky show, and I don't think she needs that to find a decent man.

 

I stopped liking Ben last week when he was, oh so sincerely, assuring every family of his deep-felt adoration for their daughters, while all along knowing most of it wasn't true.  I hope when he has a daughter, someone does the same thing to him.

 

The thing that struck me with Ben tonight was how young he sounded when talking with both Lauren and Jo-Jo.  He came off, to me, like a boy with women.  I guess he is quite young....only 25 or 26 or so....not long out of college, probably not that long into a job and possibly not all that successful at that job anyway.   I say that because who at that age could take all this time away from a job like selling.  It takes time to develop a report with buyers, and he's jeopardizing that.  And he sure as heck ain't going to make it in the TV/movie/modeling business.   Jeez, what a catch.....a kid and a poor one at that.

 

 

 

[UsernameFatigue]

I just don't believe that Calia was all that into Ben, let alone in love with him. She spent at least 5 minutes boo-hooing in the car yet didn't shed an actual tear. Not one. The whole surprise visit/breakup seemed to be producer driven, and someone in the car really should have put some eye drops in Calia's eyes to make the crying look at least a little bit real.

 

I will admit that I haven't watched a Bachelor season in awhile, but aren't there always two women that the guy is in love with and are in love with him? Though I don't recall them declaring their love to each other before at this point. However I have to say I really don't see the connection between Ben and Jo-Jo. Maybe that is because I don't like Jo-Jo and think she resembles a pug (as I believe poster JudyObscure pointed out previously) but in their kissing scenes they just do not appear to be sincere feelings but rather an act for the camera. Could their mutual 'I love you's' also be producer driven? Has their ever been a bachelor season where the last two women standing don't claim to love the bachelor? Otherwise how can you have 'the most shocking rose ceremony ever' if there is only one women he claims to love and one women that claims to love him?

 

I just can't imagine that he will end up with Jo-Jo and her dysfunctional family. And of course I figured the double rainbow that came out during Ben and Lauren's date while they were in the water is a sign. Even the producers can't rig that. But then I have always been a Lauren fan. Though at this point Ben might be right - maybe he doesn't deserve her?

Edited March 1, 2016 by UsernameFatigue

[pitchy]

That said, I do think it is a jerk move to tell someone you love them to give them the impression that you have chosen them alone, while you are actually telling someone else the same thing. And maybe "jerk" is too polite a term for it. It's cruel, and if this isn't in any way scripted then Ben is an asshole for manipulating the women to believe they have "won" his partnership.

 

Only about 1 out of every 100 of those young sea turtles will live to adulthood. It's rough out there for those little guys.

 

I kept yelling 'ASSHOLE!' at the screen showing me the fake-sincere Ben with the unblinking   gaze-into-eyes given ALL the women.  Smoothest, slickest Bachelor ever.

 

 I prefer men who act less 'nice' but are honest and not playing the  'good-guy' to bolster their own sense of worth.   In every episode, his main interest is that each woman tells him they LOVE -him- and that is the primary prerequisite for his keeping them around.

 He doesn't give a fig about how he can hurt their sense of trust for years after each has just told him she has an intense fear of being used and tossed, again, and is afraid to let down her defenses, especially in such an odd situation when she's just one of several being 'dated' at the same time.

 

  I think he is the phoniest bachelor ever but that he has convinced himself of his loving ways.  

  The only way he can save his good-guy image is to let us know he told each (or the two he did not feel as strongly about)  that he didn't want to have sex in the fantasy suite but wanted to wait until they're out of that artificial situation.

 

   Most of all -- I hate his ridiculous "puzzled" look (with the practiced concern-brow) when each woman tells him that she's  feeling anxious and not at ease now that they're down to the final three.

 He can't begin to understand why on this earth they'd feel insecure.  Sure. I can't believe how actually unempathetic he is.

 

  In fact, he's  there supposedly because he was recently in that predicament himself, but even MORE LIKELY it's because he FAKED interest in Kaitlyn (which I always suspected) so he actually never experienced that anxiety and could not have cared less that he might be let go and was probably hoping he would be.  Of course he acted very sad when let go, although he and Kaitlyn  had nothing going, since The Bachelor gig was apparently the focus.

 

  Ben shows NO real empathy for women who are telling him about being scarred from past relationships.  He wants the heart of each one for his belt and of course in front of millions in today's virtual amphitheater.  The audience even votes thumbs down for those that should be cut.

 

  The only possible saving grace is that Lauren, if she's the one -- who seems to me a really sincere, nice human --  may be JUST the 'giving' and 'forgiving' person he needs, one who'll always look to his feelings first and then maybe he'll treat her well.  But I suspect he'll love other women falling all over him eventually.  I hope I'm wrong there, for her sake.

 

  No one deserves the Ben we're seeing the last couple of weeks.

Edited March 1, 2016 by pitchy

[Artsda]

 

I just don't believe that Calia was all that into Ben, let alone in love with him. She spent at least 5 minutes boo-hooing in the car yet didn't shed an actual tear. Not one. The whole surprise visit/breakup seemed to be producer driven, and someone in the car really should have put some eye drops in Calia's eyes to make the crying look at least a little bit real.

 

I think it was setting her up as Bachelorette. The whole thing reminded me of Juan Pablo and Andy's "break up" during his season.

 

 

He doesn't give a fig about how he can hurt their sense of trust for years after each has just told him she has an intense fear of being used and tossed, again,  and that each one explains that's why she's afraid to let down her defenses, especially in such an odd situation.

 

This! He pushes them all to give more to him, let down their walls to him, not have walls up or be quiet. They have to give him all, but then when they do like Calia this episode. Breaks the wall, tells him she loves him, has sex with him, he goes and dumps her anyways because he doesn't love her but loves 2 others more and instead? He comes across awful in this regard.  He doesn't love her, but he has to push her for more.

Edited March 1, 2016 by Artsda

[Soobs]

Poor Caila! That was rough to watch. He did know that she was out when he slept with her and she felt too ashamed or awkward to actually call him out. Damn that double standard! It's for the best though. She seems like she doesn't know herself very well yet and is hung up on the status of having a boyfriend/ being loved. Ben seems like he doesn't know himself yet either. Lauren and JoJo are the most mature people left. Whoever he picks, it won't stick. This season was okay. Bummed we never got to go to Europe.

Edited March 1, 2016 by Soobs

[pitchy]

Only about 1 out of every 100 of those young sea turtles will live to adulthood. It's rough out there for those little guys.

 

I saw a nature show (probably Nat'l Geo) that showed a video made by some guys who happened upon some sand that suddenly started shifting and they saw these little babies scurrying out of them and then STRAIGHT toward the ocean at high (for turtles) speed.  Talk about instinct -- what a weird first activity after being released into the world.  And tons of them kept coming out of the hole.

 

  It was amazing.  Some said the guys were interfering with nature because in a way they were helping the babies out when they came across barriers or a sea gull or something worse  that was swooping down, and in normal life, the big birds would get many of the turtles.  That videoclip showed hundreds of them making it into the waters, but they of course didn't need to be bathed first.  Sad that so few actually survive the initial days.  

Loved this date though.  What adorable little turtles.

Edited March 1, 2016 by pitchy

[bosawks]

Ben acted like he was desperate to get the trifecta of "I love you", damn the consequences.

Kind of made me long for the good old, bad old days of Juan Pablo.....

[Alapaki]

I think Ben's "I love you's" may have been the result of a blood-flow issue.

And, remember, sleeping with a rejectee in the FS is only wrong if it involves "fiancé stuff"

[DEL901]

What was wrong with his hairline.  I could swear during the date with Lauren (or maybe it was JoJo), that it looked like he had dye or something running along his left temple and along the front of his hairline.

 

Anyway, it's been so obvious for so long that it's been Lauren B that I'm sure that the producers have been on him pressing him to give them some drama.

[nutty1]

I have no further clarity than I did after watching last night. The only words that come to mind are "WTF, Ben?!"

 

As an FYI, in real time, Caila's date was filmed first, then Jojo's and Lauren's last.

[Bobcatkitten]

So RS says the JoJo date actually happened before Lauren's. Does that matter at all in what you saw? I don't think so.

 

I'm disappointed. I have enjoyed Ben so much. But I also am not sure it's not all just an act where the producers say, well we've never made this the big storyline before. I mean Andy said it but just once and a whisper and it wasn't blown up.

[nutty1]

Self-respecting men and women seem to be going extinct.  

 

When will one woman tell the bachelor: "If you propose to me and I see that you have slept with other contestants, we're done."

 

Best thing I have read on a message board in a long time!!

[TheFinalRose]

Typical fantasy suite episode, except for the fact that Ben is such a weakling that he can't follow the rules of the show which require him to string these girls along until the end without letting them know where they stand.  The best part of the episode was the look on Lauren's face when she, Ben, and JoJo were standing there toasting and she realized that JoJo was acting pretty happy.  I could just see her putting two and two together, and Lauren earned my respect for that. JoJo, on the other hand, is not even suspecting that she could still get left on the cutting room floor.  

[bosawks]

Only about 1 out of every 100 of those young sea turtles will live to adulthood. It's rough out there for those little guys.

 

Coincidentally, only 1 out of every 100 of my brain cells will survive an episode of The Bachelor.

[Wings]

oof!

Edited March 1, 2016 by wings707

[hyacinth]

 

He doesn't give a fig about how he can hurt their sense of trust for years after each has just told him she has an intense fear of being used and tossed, again, and is afraid to let down her defenses, especially in such an odd situation when she's just one of several being 'dated' at the same time.

 

Ben now seems to see himself as a benevolent God of Love.

 

I think Ben's fiancee is going to think long and hard about what she sees on the screen.  I was dismayed when I heard Ben say to Lauren B something like:  "Are you done with not opening up to me?"   (red flag: controlling) 

 

 Men want women who are pursed by other men, not those who admit to having been hurt.  Lauren B has set herself up as a "catch" (aided masterfully by her sister) when in reality the sister or Lauren said out of Ben's hearing that she tends to give her heart to men too quickly, and has been hurt.   Emily M was the master at making herself out to be the catch of all time.  

Edited March 1, 2016 by hyacinth

[leighdear]

I'm reading this at face value and have decided that this poor dingaling really did go and fall in love with two ladies. Bless all their hearts. I think Lauren showed emotional maturity and intelligence when she shared that she thinks it's entirely possible to love two people at once. I never understood why so many people don't "believe" in that. Are our hearts really that stingy?

I think there are a lot of feels involved here, but with Ben supposedly falling in love with both women, he's put them on equal footing and has them evenly matched and is able to "see" both of them as his wife. 

 

So he could actually flip a coin and decide, right?  Because that's how his explanations sound to me. 

 

I absolutely prefer the old days when they weren't supposed to say it.  I liked hearing it at the proposal as part of the whole final soliloquy. 

[MsPH]

I will never understand how people apparently go on this show without doing any long term planning and disciplining themselves to stick to a few principles of behavior. It's not a new program. How hard is it to learn from others' past mistakes?

 

Yeah, that honestly blows my mind. I watched the first season of Bachelor New Zealand and the lead was a 26-year-old guy like Ben, but he didn't kiss anyone until episode 5 or something, made it clear that there was no sex happening on the overnight dates (his F1 didn't even share a room with him) and there were no "I love you"s exchanged even at the end. No proposal either obviously. Now a year later, the final couple is still together, very much in love and happy.

 

The US show is 30 seasons in, yet all the all the leads act like they have no clue what they've gotten themselves into. Somehow they manage to turn every season into a clusterfvck at some point. Ben came off Kaitlyn's season, which was a total mess thanks to her inability to keep her feelings (and private parts) to herself, yet he seems to have learned nothing from it. I just don't understand. How hard can it be?!

[JudyObscure]

At this point in the show I usually realize that the final three (or four or five) were among the best looking women who stepped out of the limos.  They could have skipped all the angst and 'getting to know you,' dates and jumped to a short list of  Amanda (cut for baggage issues,) Oliva and Lace, (cut for sanity issues) and  Lauren, JoJo and Caila.  Ben uses the standards of female worth learned by American boys at about age thirteen. Which is, that  the best ones are the blondest, tallest, thinnest ones  with the biggest breasts.  Lauren hits the first three, but JoJo wins the fourth criteria and it's the most heavily weighted (heh.)  JoJo, having a very rich daddy, also has the best clothes, the ones which show off her attributes to greatest advantage, so there's that. 

 

All of which means, by Ben's unoriginal, shallow rules, Caila had no chance last night. So why did he have to trump up a personality fault around her lack of tears and too much smiling, only to act angry at her when she got sad for a few minutes?  I hate that!  Just admit you like the other girl's more Ben!  Don't add to Caila's insecurity by implying she has a big personality fault. 

 

All three of these women are better than Ben.  I hope they all go home and find men who are smarter, deeper and not so soft looking.

[alexa]

I agree with the consensus that Ben screwed this up by saying he loves 2 women.  There was no benefit to that as he led them both to believe he is essentially choosing them by saying that.  When they see they were both told the same thing, that just will lead to a whole new set of issues.  But in the meantime, I just don't know what he was thinking....he knows he is going to have to choose one in the end, so how does saying I love you to the future rejected one help in any way?

[FlyingEgret]

Anyway, it's been so obvious for so long that it's been Lauren B that I'm sure that the producers have been on him pressing him to give them some drama.

 

Absolutely.  It actually looked painful when Ben had to tell JoJo he loved her the first time.  Like he didn't think she would ever believe his lie.  But the lying got easier with each piece of clothing she removed...

[Jax7917]

I don't believe for one second that Ben loves JoJo. The way he looks and talks about Lauren vs. the way he looks and talks about JoJo is night and day. What I think happened was 1 of 2 things. 1) Ben slipped and told Lauren he loves her too and the producers were not having that without him saying it to another girl too because then the win would be extremely obvious and we know the producers don't want an obvious win a couple episodes before it ends... or 2) The next couple of episodes didn't produce enough drama so Ben was told to do this to give a dramatic ending. Either way, JoJo has no chance. Ben is smitten with Lauren and his I love you to JoJo seemed very forced. 

 

Caila creeps me out.  She has this Clare vibe to her (that dramatic, shakes her head when she speaks while taking a deep breath and trying to cry and sounds so phony whenever she speaks). I'm glad she left and I also wasn't surprised. Ben looked like he was falling asleep on their date.

 

As predicted from episode 2 or 3.. Lauren is the winner and JoJo is the bachelorette. 

[Primetimer]

Ben and his three remaining women jet off to Jamaica for some Fantasy Suite time. Let us guide you through what to watch and/or fast-forward!

Read the story

[FamilyVan]

I really liked Calia's outfit though - she looked amazing in the halter top and jersey knit skirt.  I want an outfit just like that.

 

Here's what I hope happens:  The phonecall that Ben is making is to JoJo's brother to say, yeah man, you were right, I'm dumping her <click>.  

[woodscommaelle]

So the minute Ben tells JoJo he loves her, he becomes 'babe' to her instead of 'Ben.'

Interesting.

I don't know why I found that annoying.

[TiaLou]

On the one hand, I think this thing is TOTALLY SCRIPTED; Jojo was showing some fantastic acting chops by her genuinely shocked expression when Ben told her he loves her. [Theory: Whole "I love you" exchange between them was producer-driven in order to shake up boring season. Jojo was in on the gig.]

 

On the other hand, is she REALLY that good of an actor? I sort of think it was a real reaction, which makes it just sickening that he said that to her. She knows how this show works -- the lead cannot say "I love you," so if the Bachelor/ette *does* say it, that means whoever they're saying it to is the "winner." She thinks she's won ...

 

And then there was Lauren, whose reaction to Ben's declaration of love was rather different than Jojo's reaction. Lauren showed some mild surprise, but she was much more like, "Yeahhhhh, I know."

Edited March 1, 2016 by TiaLou

[waving feather]

In the real world though, Ben would be lucky if a girl who looks like Caila gave him a 2nd glance. I say this not because he's not good looking but because he's not charismatic or accomplished enough. Especially because unlike Jojo, Caila doesn't seem to have any visible self esteem issues. She may say she has to land the Bachelorette gig but I just don't see it.

I felt sorry for Lauren when she repeated multiple times that Ben is the man of her dreams. I wonder she would feel the same after watching him on TV banging 2 other girls and telling another girl he loved her in the same period of time.

I don't think Ben meant any harm but he really showed his immaturity this episode and also that he's not the brightest crayon in the box. Even Juan Pablo is more genuine than him because he never let them on by telling them he loves them (even at the end, HA!).

For me, the standard for a good Bachelor lead is Sam Wood from the Australia version. He may also get affectionate with those he likes but he never let them on this way unnecessarily and there was no proposal at the end (to a lady with a daughter). However, they are now engaged several months after the show is over.

[FamilyVan]

 

I could just see her putting two and two together, and Lauren earned my respect for that. JoJo, on the other hand,

 

 

She knows how this show works -- the lead cannot say "I love you," so if the Bachelor/ette *does* say it, that means whoever they're saying it to is the "winner." She thinks she's won ...

 

 

Right, but if they HAVE seen the show before, they know that for the Bachelor to say ILY back, spoils the ending.  At that point why (or how) continue with the show in any kind of suspenseful way? So I do give Lauren credit for figuring out how this is able to still be playing out up to the final episode, that he must have said it to both of them.

Edited March 1, 2016 by FamilyVan

[laurakaye]

   Most of all -- I hate his ridiculous "puzzled" look (with the practiced concern-brow) when each woman tells him that she's  feeling anxious and not at ease now that they're down to the final three.

 He can't begin to understand why on this earth they'd feel insecure.  Sure. I can't believe how actually unempathetic he is.

 

  

THANK.  YOU.

 

I am one who tends to watch this show with a strong side-eye...as in, I'll watch for five minutes and then turn it off with a huff, both guilty and annoyed that I got caught up in the dramz.  This season, I've been watching it all, painful as it may be.

 

Ben had to have practiced that face in the mirror for hours...the thoughtful, puzzled eyes, staring deep into the soul of whatever woman he's with, asking "Why are you scared?  Why are you holding back?  Do my sad eyes not mesmerize you?"  It's funny at this point.  I hate how the women all dance around the fact that it's highly difficult to fall in love with someone when you know he's dating other women.  And yet, there's sad puppy Ben, asking "But why?" with his eyes.  

 

When Ben dumps someone, and then asks if he can walk them out, I keep hoping someone shows him the hand and tells him to take several seats, but it never happens.  Caila was my last best chance.

[woodscommaelle]

I thought Lauren's peach 'ensemble' was tacky as shit.  Looks like something that would get you auffed on Project Runway. 

[MakeMeLaugh]

I don't feel one bit sorry for these nitwits--these are college-educated young women and a college-educated young man who knew exactly what they were getting into and what happens every single time on this show--odds are very high that you will not receive the final rose, and also high that you will not move farther in the relationship if you do. It's not a news story, it's not a documentary, and in the scope of the world what happens on this show matter not the slightest. Is Ben a dog in real life? Who knows, but probably not. Are these women the dumbest college graduates to not have read The Rules? Who knows, but again, probably not. Is the Fantasy Suite one of the ickiest concepts on TV? Probably.

Last night's episode Made Me Laugh.

[Ketzel]

From Stephanie's Watch/Skip Index:

At dinner, Ben says he'd like to "cheers to a great day." If I've said it once, I've said it a million times, and here I am saying it again: CAN WE ALL STOP USING "CHEERS" AS A VERB? THANKS IN ADVANCE OKAY BYE.

Oh no! Bad enough the contestants are Englishly grammatically challengeded. Now it's infecting the actual good writers?!

[Psst, Stephanie,"cheers" is a verb. As in: My brother isn't a real football fan; he just cheers for whoever is winning.]

Ben's particular grammatical failure here isn't that he's using it as a verb. It's that he's got the subject/verb agreement wrong, as he almost always manages to do. Nothing wrong with "I'd like to cheer to a great day," other than it sounds kind of clumsy, especially when he obviously meant he'd like to "toast" to a great day. Or he could have used "cheers" as a noun, as Stephanie (correctly) prefers and said, "Cheers to a great day."

*teacher voice* Ben . . . oh forget it.

Edited March 1, 2016 by Ketzel

[KateeBar]

I think we learned a few important things last night.

 

1) JoJo wears a post-coital messy bun much better than Lauren does. I think Lauren is cute, but that bun really punctuated something unusual about her face shape and structure.

2) No contestant ever packs enough blotting sheets. I feel like that's something you write down when watching old seasons as prep. 

3) The show's production staff really likes to sneak in a good boner shot. Awkward.

 

I can't even get into the "I love you" business. I do find it amusing at just how quickly Ben went from best bachelor ever to super-villain. I love social media.

[laurakaye]

Lauren, for what it's worth - it's "get to," not "getta."  As in, "I get to spend the whole night with Ben!"  Two words! 

 

The "morning after, no makeup, messy bun, glowing skin, secret smile" segments made me feel all the icky feels in a way that no show has done to me before - at least, not since "Flavor of Love."  That's saying something.

[Dirtybubble]

 

The only thing I got from last night's episode was Caila's audition for the next Bachelorette.  From the overly dramatic confession during the hometown visit with her dad (how she whispers her feelings to her dad about Ben) to this b.s. Blarf =(   And knowing my luck she will be the next B'rette

 

 

[bosawks]

Has Ben always been such a slow blinker?

[sarkygal]

Just when you think this show can't go any lower...sigh. That rose ceremony toast with Ben hugging both women made me cringe. I can't imagine either woman watching this now and thinking highly of him. At least Juan Pablo was honest in his douchiness.

[eteffi]

From Stephanie's Watch/Skip Index:

Oh no! Bad enough the contestants are Englishly grammatically challengeded. Now it's infecting the actual good writers?!

[Psst, Stephanie,"cheers" is a verb. As in: My brother isn't a real football fan; he just cheers for whoever is winning.]

Ben's particular grammatical failure here isn't that he's using it as a verb. It's that he's got the subject/verb agreement wrong, as he almost always manages to do. Nothing wrong with "I'd like to cheer to a great day," other than it sounds kind of clumsy, especially when he obviously meant he'd like to "toast" to a great day. Or he could have used "cheers" as a noun, as Stephanie (correctly) prefers and said, "Cheers to a great day."

*teacher voice* Ben . . . oh forget it.

Yeah, no. "(To) cheer" is a verb. "(To) cheers" is not. You wouldn't say "my brother cheerses for whoever is winning." I stand by my original statement. 

[violetr]

Just when you think this show can't go any lower...sigh. That rose ceremony toast with Ben hugging both women made me cringe. I can't imagine either woman watching this now and thinking highly of him. At least Juan Pablo was honest in his douchiness.

 

 

I kept thinking maybe the three of them should just date for awhile. They all seem to get along well. I'm now imagining Ben proposing to both of them at the final rose ceremony and both of them accepting. Now *that* would be the most Dramatic. Episode. Ever. 

 

I thought Lauren's peach 'ensemble' was tacky as shit.  Looks like something that would get you auffed on Project Runway.

 

 

No one should ever wear peach. It's so grandma. 

[kingshearte]

Self-respecting men and women seem to be going extinct.  

 

When will one woman tell the bachelor: "If you propose to me and I see that you have slept with other contestants, we're done."

Or better yet, have a lead who just plain refuses to use the fantasy suite with anyone (as, I gather from some posts above, one dude on the Australian show did? Good on him.).

 

Honestly, I don't necessarily think that monogamy or sexual abstemiousness is for everyone, and there's a part of me that feels like if a lead wanted to sleep with absolutely every single contestant, including the ones they boot on the very first night, then whatever, as long as they're honest about the fact that that's how it's going to be. On the other hand, there is an inherent power dynamic to this show that makes just about any sexual interaction kinda icky. So while I'm fine with respectful, above-board promiscuity in general, I think that, in the context of this show, it's all gross. Especially when you layer the feelings talk on top of it. It all just gets weird and squicky, and no one really comes out of it looking very good.

[hnygrl]

I'm not going to pile on the Ben is a Douche Canoe bandwagon.

He's 26 years old. He's a kid.

Know what I think when I'm taking this show seriously and not side-eyeing the obviously producer-driven plots (I'm looking at you Caila, our next B'ette, because you're "not-white-white" so the "this show is toooooo white" people can get off our backs)?

 

Ben is stuck between the one he WANTS (Jojo) and the one he knows he should/could/will have (Lauren).

Lauren's the one his momma will choose. Jojo is the one he'll  have hot dirty sex with for the rest of his life. He's super into Jojo, but Lauren is the sweet sexy little girl next door that will make his momma and his hometown proud, and raise his little rug rats to be great big douche canoes like daddy one day.

 

He reall is Jason Mesnick the second...caught between the one one wants and the one that's appropriate. Only Mesnick was smart enough to correct the mistake.

 

Ben's a kid. He'll stay with Lauren and dream about Jojo.

And Lauren's so damn young she'll stay with him even after watching this episode, and all her friends/family telling her the truth. She's only freakin' 22...only 4 years out of hight school. She WON for pete's sake..eesh...I'm not saying this right...

 

She's the one I feel the most sorry for though. She's the one who'll get the sad, knowing looks until he finally dumps her after the contractually obligated 6 month engagement period.

Edited March 1, 2016 by hnygrl

[sofiah]

To me Ben's 'I love you' to Jojo had a kind of sad nostalgic aspect to it.  Actually, the way he is with her kind of reminds me of interactions I've had with exes, once we know we're breaking up, but the love and affection that is inevitably still there is magnified due to the sadness of the whole situation.  

 

Either way I think he does really like both of them... I think Ben will like his number 2, who he dumps, more them some leads ever liked their final choice. I don't know why... I just get a weird vibe from this season, like maybe these last 3 people are actually having real feelings (gasp!!!).  By 3 I mean Ben, Jojo and Lauren, not Caila.  

 

Anyway, this is from parade.com interview with Chris Harrison:

 

You joked recently that Ben wasn’t gentlemanly enough in the Fantasy Suite. There are magazines reporting that Ben ended up sleeping with all three women. If that information is true, would it surprise you?

 

A) The latter part, I won’t even comment on. B) I made some flippant comment to someone [about the Fantasy Suite] and then every rag and tabloid picked it up and has written some ridiculous stories. Ben is easily the most faithful, good man you will ever run across. I also in the same interview said that if a Ben showed up someday to date my daughter, I would get down on my knees to thank God. He is the sweetest, most gentle soul that I have run across. He is a great man.

Edited March 1, 2016 by sofiah

[Kareem]

I think we learned a few important things last night.

1) JoJo wears a post-coital messy bun much better than Lauren does. I think Lauren is cute, but that bun really punctuated something unusual about her face shape and structure. ...

I thought this last night as well. I think she's cute but think sometimes she looks pretty, sometimes she looks a bit old and sometimes she looks just like the elf who wanted to be a dentist in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, as did her dad.

[UsernameFatigue]

She's only freakin' 22

 

I thought that Lauren B is 25? And that Jo-Jo and Calia are both a year younger at 24. They are all too young (including Ben) but I don't think any of the contestants are as young as 22.

Edited March 1, 2016 by UsernameFatigue

[MakeMeLaugh]

Lauren and Jojo graduated from high school in 2008 I believe. Probably will be 26 this year? Bachelorette ages apparently get etched in stone at some point and are never updated.