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Joy and Austin: This One Time At Family Camp

frenchtoast

By frenchtoast
in Counting On

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Arwen Evenstar

Arwen Evenstar

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To me, it's just sad to read about how Joy was crying on her wedding day. My sister cried, but from happiness, but I don't get that with Joy. Poor lass was led like a lamb to slaughter, rather than a happy bride.

She knows there's nothing else for her and her only way out of The Stinkertoy House and a life of J-Slavery is to enter into this marriage.  Just hope Austin was gentle with her on their wedding night.

 And being recently outed as one of Joshley's victims weeks before her wedding by joining a lawsuit must have been a watershed of emotion for her as well.  

Most of all, I blame her father for pimping her out when she has the maturity of a 10 year old at best. Yeah, she's of legal age, but her emotional age is something else entirely.  Selling your daughter down the river for ratings, while marrying off the last of "the damaged goods" (in the Gothardverse only) as a bonus....SHAME ON YOU, Jim Bob! No man who professes to love his child would dream of doing what was just done to poor Joy!!!

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Sew Sumi

Sew Sumi

Okay, I just saw the commercial. Joy was definitely ugly-crying. 19 year old brides shouldn't be ugly-crying, unless there is "something else" going on. I can't imagine how she could compartmentalize the lawsuit and a wedding just a week later, especially with the emotional maturity of a tween, as @Arwen Evenstar (welcome back!) noted.

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Spencer Hastings

Spencer Hastings

(edited)

Poor Joy. She's just barely older than my senior girls this year and I would be heartbroken if any of them were to get married in the next couple of years.  They're all so bright, capable, healthy, and were raised to be free thinkers with hopes and dreams--exactly the opposite of what Joy's parents wanted for her.  They are not, however, emotionally mature enough to get married. 

Joy is a little girl who was victimized by her family and had to give up her closest friend Josiah (remember how close they were?!) because she was a victim and her parents were terrified of brother/sister relationships.  She had to stop climbing trees, catching bugs, running around barefoot through the mud, and getting scraped and scars in favor of  pretending to love being "girly."  Her entire life has been other people making decisions about who and what she should be.  This was all over the course of a few years.  It kills me that she's now someone's wife. 

Edit: I get that the other girls were essentially sold off and told who and what they should be, but I think Joy bothers me more because we saw all of this go down on camera.  The other girls were more or less clones of each other already but Joy was so different.   We saw what a little tomboy she was and how vivacious she could be.  Then we saw the lights go out.  It makes me so sad for her.

Edited by Spencer Hastings
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xwordfanatik

xwordfanatik

I do hope Joy will manage to be happy, somehow.  I do believe the marriage was hurried up & arranged by Boob, just to keep that TLC gravy train a-rolling.  

I was a very young bride myself (18) and I'm still married, many, many moons later, so I know it CAN work.  BUT, I chose Mr. Xword without my dad's help.  We waited years before we had our child, until WE knew we were ready.  Those options will not be available in this pairing.

Ugly-crying at one's one wedding is not a good sign.  I haven't seen the commercial yet.  To think that my parents would have sold me off like that just makes me sick.  

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JoanArc

JoanArc

23 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

According to Duggar Family blog, 1,002 guests attended the wedding, Joy's gown was designed by the same person who desiged Jinger's, and when they return fom their honeymoon they are building a house near both sets of parents.

He's got enough money to afford land and a house? With no debt? Maybe it's a tent or rv.

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Natalie68

Natalie68

51 minutes ago, Spencer Hastings said:

Poor Joy. She's just barely older than my senior girls this year and I would be heartbroken if any of them were to get married in the next couple of years.  They're all so bright, capable, healthy, and were raised to be free thinkers with hopes and dreams--exactly the opposite of what Joy's parents wanted for her.  They are not, however, emotionally mature enough to get married. 

Joy is a little girl who was victimized by her family and had to give up her closest friend Josiah (remember how close they were?!) because she was a victim and her parents were terrified of brother/sister relationships.  She had to stop climbing trees, catching bugs, running around barefoot through the mud, and getting scraped and scars in favor of  pretending to love being "girly."  Her entire life has been other people making decisions about who and what she should be.  This was all over the course of a few years.  It kills me that she's now someone's wife. 

Edit: I get that the other girls were essentially sold off and told who and what they should be, but I think Joy bothers me more because we saw all of this go down on camera.  The other girls were more or less clones of each other already but Joy was so different.   We saw what a little tomboy she was and how vivacious she could be.  Then we saw the lights go out.  It makes me so sad for her.

I have no kids but I work at a university and see these kids who are 18/19 coming to college.  They ARE babies.  Maybe in past years they may have been mature at that age but no longer.  I feel that the benefit of living alone or with roommates before settling down is high.  Back in the dark ages when I was 19, despite living on my own for nearly 2 years and supporting myself, I would NOT have been ready for marriage.  I wasn't ready when I did get married at 22.  I am a firm believer in finding out who you are before starting this kind of life.  The only reason Mr. Natalie and I are still married is because we didn't have kids and got to work out whatever differences we had and finished growing up without adding the stresses of caring for a baby.  And both of us had skills and a job.  Not some rube who can barely formulate a thought.  But good luck Joy!  

  • Love 11
Caracoa1

Caracoa1

(edited)

Do kids in these cults even know how to reach out for help to escape these awful families they were born into?  If I lived in Arkansas I would somehow reach out to Joy and let her know there is a life outside of being  joyfully availabile and breeding.  Going to school, reading, sports, movies, friends!

Edited by Caracoa1
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nightmeri

nightmeri

People on this blog, and others, have speculated that Joy's wedding night may have been a less than pleasant experience or, at the very least, awkward. I still argue that out of all the brides Anna probably had the worst wedding night. Remember how Joshly grabbed her at the altar and forced a very aggressive kiss on her?  He knew it was her first kiss, yet he could not be bothered to make it special for her. Combine that with her having to lug the luggage...he had zero sh*ts to give about her comfort or well being. I am sure her wedding night was a nightmare (remember Smuggly bragging about them moving from bed to bed in the honeymoon rental?) <shudder >

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ariel

ariel

(edited)
1 hour ago, nightmeri said:

People on this blog, and others, have speculated that Joy's wedding night may have been a less than pleasant experience or, at the very least, awkward. I still argue that out of all the brides Anna probably had the worst wedding night. Remember how Joshly grabbed her at the altar and forced a very aggressive kiss on her?  He knew it was her first kiss, yet he could not be bothered to make it special for her. Combine that with her having to lug the luggage...he had zero sh*ts to give about her comfort or well being. I am sure her wedding night was a nightmare (remember Smuggly bragging about them moving from bed to bed in the honeymoon rental?) <shudder >

The Smuggs wedding night does sound like "Rosemary's Baby".

Edited by ariel
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Marigold

Marigold

Ok, I googled up the Joy wedding promo.

I must agree with you guys.  The clip of Joy crying is disturbing.  She looks sad and upset.  Not "happy bride tears" at all.  Austin tries to wipe them away and she says "stop" rather sharply. 

I usually like to see things in context but in what context would this be any better?   

  • Love 3
Sew Sumi

Sew Sumi

People at FJ don't think she's crying hard enough for an "ugly cry." I argued that her face was contorted; it wasn't just tears rolling down her cheeks. It still bothers me. IMHO, one doesn't have to be red-faced with snot running out of one's nose to be ugly crying. MMV obviously varies there, as I found out. Sure, that's ugly, but I think there are gradiations on the scale. 

GeeGolly

GeeGolly

I haven't seen the promo, but any network worth their salt is going to pick one to get people talking. The one for Jinger's honeymoon looked like Jinger & Jeremy had a difficult time with the Chef, and they were all having a good time.

Apparently they wrote their own vows and while there's a risk their vows might make viewers cry for different reasons, I'm guessing Austin wrote something that touched Joy deeply.

BetyBee

BetyBee

7 hours ago, Marigold said:

Ok, I googled up the Joy wedding promo.

I must agree with you guys.  The clip of Joy crying is disturbing.  She looks sad and upset.  Not "happy bride tears" at all.  Austin tries to wipe them away and she says "stop" rather sharply. 

I usually like to see things in context but in what context would this be any better?   

I can't seem to find this clip.  Is it possible to provide a link?

PikaScrewChu

PikaScrewChu

All four of them have been married off to line Jim Bob's pockets. There's only so many shows you can do about wisdom teeth removal and eating in restaurants before it becomes stale. Jill and Jessa's weddings were arguably the peak of 19 K&C. Now there's only Jana left and she's holding out. They've had to turn to the boys courting and getting married to keep the show going. And they have to prove that the courtship model is working. Totally!

I hope by Hannie et al. Jim Bob and Michelle are too tired to foster this courtship model on them. We all know Golden Child Josie is going to get what she wants anyway.

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Fuzzysox

Fuzzysox

16 hours ago, ginger90 said:

According to Duggar Family blog, 1,002 guests attended the wedding, Joy's gown was designed by the same person who desiged Jinger's, and when they return fom their honeymoon they are building a house near both sets of parents.

So Joyless will be getting a brand new house better than Jessa or Jinger got.

I think after the initial shock, I think Joy will be better off than her sisters because Austin will make sure that she has a good life and has skills that will carry him through life vs the "minister" husbands.

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lulu69

lulu69

47 minutes ago, Fuzzysox said:

So Joyless will be getting a brand new house better than Jessa or Jinger got.

I think after the initial shock, I think Joy will be better off than her sisters because Austin will make sure that she has a good life and has skills that will carry him through life vs the "minister" husbands.

We thought Derick had the 'skills' to carry Jill and him through life and look how wrong we were. Sucked into the Duggar grifting vortex within months.

  • Love 15
sometimesy

sometimesy

(edited)

I don't watch the show much, but from clips it sounds like Austen is the only SIL not interested in a ministry:

Bin-youth minister and saviour of the inner city by riding on some organizations coattails

Derelict-Aryan overload minister funded by bible believing suckers

Jeremy-intergalatic super star billionaire tv evangelist (but he will start of in a closet in Texas)

The way JB can suck all the life and $ out of Austen is to absorb the flipping business Austen has set up. I mean, the family needs to share and work together so why shouldn't Austen surrender his independence since they have the same business model. He probably will have the brothers help him on a few projects, then it weeps into every project done together, until finally they are merged completely and guess who handles the money.. Jana the accountant, childcare specialist, chef and chatelaine. 

Edited by sometimesy
  • Love 12
drafan

drafan

10 hours ago, Marigold said:

 

I must agree with you guys.  The clip of Joy crying is disturbing.  She looks sad and upset.  Not "happy bride tears" at all.  Austin tries to wipe them away and she says "stop" rather sharply. 

 

JB was probably holding up the "CRY" cue card and that's the best she could do. Either that or because she was forced to starve for weeks before ...and wear a dress.

22 minutes ago, sometimesy said:

I don't watch the show much, but from clips it sounds like Austen is the only SIL not interested in a ministry:

 

Yet.

  • Love 4
Missy Vixen

Missy Vixen

5 minutes ago, Westiepeach said:

Very curious here. Can you share with me as well, if you don't mind?

I just sent you a private message. ;-)

To everybody else that's been posting here for a while now: I'm sorry to be so cloak and dagger about this. FJ actually instituted a policy of talking about sensitive subjects and the minor-age Duggars. I don't want to post anything publicly that could be a problem for Joy or allow the media sources reading these boards to use it for a story.

My opinion and I hope that I am wrong.

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RedheadZombie

RedheadZombie

(edited)
1 hour ago, Missy Vixen said:

I just sent you a private message. ;-)

To everybody else that's been posting here for a while now: I'm sorry to be so cloak and dagger about this. FJ actually instituted a policy of talking about sensitive subjects and the minor-age Duggars. I don't want to post anything publicly that could be a problem for Joy or allow the media sources reading these boards to use it for a story.

My opinion and I hope that I am wrong.

May I assume it's similar to talk when Josiah became engaged?  

ETA:  I think they only got to the courting stage.  

Edited by RedheadZombie
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Almost 3000

Almost 3000

2 hours ago, Missy Vixen said:

I just sent you a private message. ;-)

To everybody else that's been posting here for a while now: I'm sorry to be so cloak and dagger about this. FJ actually instituted a policy of talking about sensitive subjects and the minor-age Duggars. I don't want to post anything publicly that could be a problem for Joy or allow the media sources reading these boards to use it for a story.

My opinion and I hope that I am wrong.

Pretty please, me too. I actually think they may be a pretty good couple. Joy showed a lot of spunk when she was showing Ben around on the golf cart tour. She seemed to be in charge.

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