S11.E13: It's Not You, It's Miami

[KungFuBunny]

Did Dorinda just threaten to send Luann a Loovers letter?

[SweetieDarling]

4 minutes ago, bosawks said:

For some reason Harry Dubin always reminds me of a used cocktail napkin.

Maybe that's why I thought he and Sonja made such a cute couple(?)

[Neurochick]

When I got sober, I realized just how boring and stupid drunks are.  Sonja is a prime example of a sloppy, stupid, disgusting drunk.  Dorinda defending a drunk shows how much of an alcoholic SHE probably is.

[nexxie]

Bravo shouldn’t have aired this.

[Straycat80]

Why are they bothering trying to talk to and reason with someone as fucked up as Sonja. Dorinda is a close second in the beyond fucked up department now. 

Lu was right to walk away. 

[tranquilidade]

It's a train wreck but for some reason I have to look.

[farmgal4]

3 minutes ago, KungFuBunny said:

Did Dorinda just threaten to send Luann a Loovers letter?

I can’t understand half of what Dorinda says when she’s drinking.

[bosawks]

I’m pretty sure Beth is waiting upstairs hoping Sonja passes out before she comes down.

[Stats Queen]

Sonja is out of control - she needs serious therapy and a huge slap in the face.

Well, her behavior is so bad the others behavior seems almost normal.

[farmgal4]

3 minutes ago, nexxie said:

Bravo shouldn’t have aired this.

I don’t think it’ll bother Sonja.

[JD5166]

3 minutes ago, nexxie said:

Bravo shouldn’t have aired this.

You’re kidding, right? Andy probably gave Sonja whatever she’s on to amp up the drama! 

[whydoievencare]

What a shitshow this dinner has become!  Wait, no, that was Cartagena!

[nexxie]

Just now, farmgal4 said:

I don’t think it’ll bother Sonja.

I’m thinking of her daughter.

[njbchlover]

23 minutes ago, BodhiGurl said:

OMFG The damn room battle... yeesh. I preferred the few times the women did it via pulling numbers out of a hat, or when Tins did the Tiffany's necklace thing. For the lurve of gawd, ultimately it's just a place to crash at night. They're not living there for the rest of their lives. I'm sure all the beds are perfectly fine. 

The beds and bedrooms all look beyond fine - they're all amazing!!  And all much nicer than any of their bedrooms at home!!!  

[pieinmyeye]

Will someone please sedate Sonja? I’m thinking a horse tranquilizer might take her down a couple of notches.

[Bronzedog]

If Sonja drinks like this a lot, I’m kind of surprised she’s still alive.  Seriously.  She’s totally out of control.

[TexasGal]

I’m gonna say one nice thing - Bethenny’s dress/romper at dinner is gorgeous.

[Neurochick]

Why are they pissed at Luann when Sonja is acting like a fucking idiot?  What's with Bethenny, who really has no right to call anybody else narcissistic.

I feel bad for Luann because I've been the sober person in a room full of drunken idiots, and everybody thinks the drunks are "funny" when really they're fucked up.

Edited May 30, 2019 by Neurochick

[bosawks]

Ok, Lu referring to herself in the third person in her TH attempting to explain how it’s not her it’s them was pretty funny.

And I don’t even think she’s wrong about how the dinner went down.

[BodhiGurl]

4 minutes ago, njbchlover said:

The beds and bedrooms all look beyond fine - they're all amazing!!  And all much nicer than any of their bedrooms at home!!!  

Exactly my point - these women act like one room is superior to the other and battle for the "best room" - when all the rooms are great. I'll admit they (the women) weren't as bad this time around as past years but Romonja were pushing it...as usual. LOL

Edited May 30, 2019 by BodhiGurl
clarifying my "they weren't as bad..." lol

[KungFuBunny]

Holy Shit that hour just flew by

[whydoievencare]

OMG - that scene with Luann and Ramona...Luann says that the girls have a problem with her success and Ramona quickly replies "that's not it".  Too funny.

[BodhiGurl]

And once again - Ramona is an arse. It's a group trip - invite them all. That was shitty what she did to Barbra and I'm not even a Barbra fan. Maybe they should all go out and leave Ramona behind. 

[bosawks]

I hope the staff get hazard pay.

[Rhetorica]

So,  it's the year of the woman,  right?  Ya think these drunk bitches are empowering the next generation?  What an uncomfortable episode to watch... 

[Neurochick]

Just now, whydoievencare said:

OMG - that scene with Luann and Ramona...Luann says that the girls have a problem with her success and Ramona quickly replies "that's not it".  Too funny.

But the thing is, Luann isn't the only one who's delusional.  Both Sonja and Dorinda think they're all that when they're really a couple of sad drunks, and no one wants to call THEM on it.  Bethenny thinks she's all that but wants to put down Luann.  Really, what if someone said Bethenny is starting to look like one of those "faces of meth?"

[Bronzedog]

Loved Bethenny saying she wasn’t surprised Sonja was drunk, she was surprised Harry Dubin keeps finding women that will kiss him.

[ghoulina]

It may have been rude, but I would much rather listen to Sonja heckle Lu than listen to Lu do cabaret for the 56th time. 

That being said, Sonja definitely has been manic this season. It's not just drunk. It's drunk times 10. And I'm sure Lu is just soooo concerned. (More like thrilled that someone else's behavior can take the attention off of her.)

I love Dorinda, but she can't really control what Lu talks about in her show. That's how "comedy" works. 

That house was a bit modern for me, but the views are stunning. 

Of course Ramona and Sonja get the master. And immediately start in on the poor staff. Run, Tej!

Notice how they all think B is a diva about rooms, but she was perfectly fine with the one she ended up with. Didn't bat an eye. 

Hey, Ramona, they have pool noodles!

The Harry Dubin fight is so gross. And Ramona is basically right. Staying away from all of Sonja's past conquests would result in lifelong celibacy. 

I don't care for Barb, but I felt so badly for her when Ramona openly iced her out of going out. What a cruel woman she is. 

[tribeca]

The house reminds me of Avia’s place.   So much white. It was pretty though. 

Bethany yelling go to sleep was just like scary island.  No one seemed to think Sonya was acting out of control.  She looked like she was on drugs.  It wasn’t pretty.  

Edited May 30, 2019 by tribeca

[chewycandy]

Someone please show Sonja a clip of her calmly asking “how did we get here?” in the episode where Dorinda was ranting and raving at Heather over dinner. 

[Jellybean13]

My God, that was a sad hour of television.  I can't believe those women can't see how this show is contributing the the demise of their sanity.  Andy Cohn really needs to sit back and examine the crap he is putting out there.  

On the good side, I loved Bethenny's dress.  

[Quita]

I really felt for the staff of this home, especially poor Tej, having to watch Ramona's unpacking fashion show and then being subjected to Sonja renaming him aaaaand her panties! I want to send him a tip.

[tranquilidade]

Poor Tej.  I hope he is paid well.

Am I the only one who thinks Lu has a terrible voice?  

[65mickey]

39 minutes ago, KungFuBunny said:

Ooooohh...Dorinda crossed the street right over to SlurryVille

Yep complete with food on the side of her mouth. 

[Pickles]

45 minutes ago, Straycat80 said:

That poor guy suffering thru Ramona’s clothing descriptions,  You can almost see the bubble over his head saying get me the fuck out of here! 

Same with the bartender having to stand by while Dorinda schooled him on making drinks. 

[Gem 10]

Someone call the paramedics, seriously.  Sonja needs a strait jacket and has to go to the looney bin.  She’s either on something or trying to secure her Apple.  I’d say on something, combined with booze.

[mbaywife123]

YIKES! is all I can comment for this episode.

[ancslove]

Wow.  Just wow.

Ok, so I hate it, but I agree with Luann that Sonja is definitely on something more than just "happiness".  However, I could also see why the others blew off Luann in NYC, because with everyone together, Sonja didn't seem any wilder than normal (and certainly not as manic as she was at Lu's rehearsal).  But they should all be rethinking everything after Miami!  Bethenny's summary of Drunk Sonja and Drunk Dorinda was pretty on point.

I did laugh at Bethenny's flat "You deserve it" to Luann.  But she probably wished she'd stayed up with Lu, hashed everything out, and then gossiped about Sonja.  And Lu's dress was gorgeous.

[goofygirl]

Well, THAT was a shitshow dinner!  But I have to say, YOU GUYS are hilarious! And Neurochick, you are on fire!

[12momine]

Just imagine how Avery and Quincy must feel having these creatures for mothers. Poor kids.  And next week we’ll have MarryO. Can’t wait.  

[tranquilidade]

I keep waiting for that old feeling I used to get watching this show.  

[mbaywife123]

2 minutes ago, tranquilidade said:

I keep waiting for that old feeling I used to get watching this show.  

Stop waiting, that train has left the station and will not be returning EVER again.

[LibertarianSlut]

I'm surprised RHNYC was preempted by Intervetnion, what with them being on different networks and all...

[farmgal4]

When these women go out-of-town/on trips, who provides and pays for hair and makeup?  Does each woman bring her own hairstylist/makeup artist?  Does Bravo provide that service for them?  How does that work, do you think?

18 minutes ago, tranquilidade said:

Poor Tej.  I hope he is paid well.

Tej was probably job hunting the next day.

[farmgal4]

22 minutes ago, Quita said:

I really felt for the staff of this home, especially poor Tej, having to watch Ramona's unpacking fashion show and then being subjected to Sonja renaming him aaaaand her panties! I want to send him a tip.

I want to send him a tip and a sympathy card.

[nexxie]

54 minutes ago, KungFuBunny said:

Sonja's clear chicken cutlets are showing...eeek

Noticed that, but what are they for?!

[howiveaddict]

57 minutes ago, Steph J said:

Not that any of these women have even remotely good taste in men, but who wants to hang out with guys that Luann has picked out? No thanks.

Probably a group of Johnny Depp pirate wannabes with show up.

30 minutes ago, tranquilidade said:

Poor Tej.  I hope he is paid well.

Am I the only one who thinks Lu has a terrible voice?  

No, your not. She does.

I just hope these women tip the staff very well. Of course, I heard that Ramona doesn't tip well .

12 minutes ago, farmgal4 said:

When these women go out-of-town/on trips, who provides and pays for hair and makeup?  Does each woman bring her own hairstylist/makeup artist?  Does Bravo provide that service for them?  How does that work, do you think?

Tej was probably job hunting the next day.

The man who I assume was the head butler, said they had someone coming to give them blow outs. Then drunk Sonja said to change the second word.

I find it creepy that Ramona has a strange man handling her clothes, especially undergarments.

Looking at the title of this episode reminds me of when my daughter was younger,  This was when Miami Vice was on tv. She was about 3.  We would say Miami Vice and she would say, it's not your ami it's my ami!

[njbchlover]

Seriously, if I were Bethenny and I walked into that gorgeous home, but then, heard all of the drunken shrieking, slurring and ridiculousness, I would have walked back out, jumped in the car and went to the nearest hotel.  The incredulous look on her face when she peeked in at drunk Sonja was something!!  

She was very brave.  

This episode made me feel just as sad as I did when I watched Scary Island.  Sonja is off the rails and has to definitely be on something - that's not "happiness" - that is extreme crazy.  Luann was correct - her behavior is manic.  

Dorinda was also well into her cups, as well, but for some reason, it doesn't bother me as much because I think that Dorinda bounces back from her drinking better, and with Dorinda, I do think that is only alcohol, nothing else.  

And, Luann doesn't need to drink - she is drunk on egotism and her own self-importance - what a conceited bitch she is being this season.  

Poor Tinsley (I feel like that is all we are saying all season about Tinsley - "Poor Tinsley this" and "Poor Tinsley that") and Barbara.  I don't like Barbara, but my heart broke for her when Ramona also acted like a snooty bitch and didn't include her in the plans to go out.  "Tinsley and I have some things to catch up on" - Yeah, right, Ramona - because you and Tinsley will be able to have an in-depth conversation at whatever pick-up joint club you are planning to go to, with your boobs falling out of your dress.  

Tinsley looked sooo uncomfortable over all of this.  

Overall, a very sad and depressing episode to watch.

OTOH, a few nice things:

Dorinda looked stunning at the tree lighting and it looked like she thoroughly enjoyed it (although, I do think she was drunk then, too).  

Luann's dress for dinner was stunning, as was Bethenny's romper - and they matched!!  

That house - OMG!!!  I think this was the nicest accommodations I've ever seen on ANY housewife show, ever!!  These NY ladies definitely get the BEST accommodations out of any of the franchises.

[walnutqueen]

1 hour ago, nexxie said:

That poor man doesn’t care about your clothes, legs or “boobies” Ramona!

Neither does anyone else.

1 hour ago, chewycandy said:

Beth approached the wailing beast that is Sonja as I would—clinging to the wall. 

I'd need a whip and a chair.

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, bosawks said:

Even in the context of NYC Sonja or even vacation Sonja, Miami Sonja is out of her fucking mind.

I don’t know if it’s scripted or real, but she is insufferable tonight.   The woman is batso and has to be hospitalized ASAP and her system cleaned out, plus a shrink.