Dear Diary: Question Of The Day(s)

[MargeGunderson]

I tell people how long they can keep data, where they can put it, and how they can manage it. Basically, I tell people what to do 🙂

[DearEvette]

I work with all constituencies by querying relational databases across different platforms using different toolkits  from all our different enterprise systems in order to aid in crafting data driven decisions.

 

*btw, this was literally a description a consulting company whom HR had hired to determine if we were all in the correct pay-band for our market wrote in a final trip report and my boss, when she read it said out loud 'What the actual fuck is this?'

[WinnieWinkle]

A direct quote from my brother explains how most people seem to think my job should be described: "you mean you have to go to university to learn how to stamp out books?"

Edited May 25, 2021 by WinnieWinkle

[Quof]

People do stupid things and think I can undo it.   If they had only asked me beforehand, I would have told them not to do it.  

[Guest]

I recognize chaos.

I root cause where chaos is coming from

I escalate chaos

I propose a solution for chaos

I get partial agreement

I manage chaos.

I field calls about the chaos.

I say "no shit, I escalated the chaos".

I escalate the chaos again.

I propose a solution for the chaos again

I get another incremental sliver to implement a solution.

I mange the chaos.

I rinse and repeat.

Then I go to the store because I've got 60D on the rest of you on the shit storm that is coming.

TL;DR I work in supply chain.

[ohjoy]

I handle basic numbers for people who get paid three times as much as me to handle non-basic numbers. The people repeatedly ask me questions about the numbers and then tend to ignore/forget my answers about the numbers. They demand/request I make changes to the numbers, which I try to accommodate unless I think it will get me in trouble with the people who make the rules about the numbers.

[jewel21]

I sit behind a desk while a madman yells at me and barks and tells me what to enter into a computer to send to insurance companies. I also take people's money, and answer this annoying device called a phone. 

Also, people call me and expect me to make miracles happen and accommodate their needs and get upset when that is not always possible. 

Lastly, I sometimes get papers with numbers on them from said insurance companies and have to enter those numbers into a computer. 

Oh, and I ask if people have covid symptoms and aim a device at their foreheads to be sure they are not contagious with fever. 

[isalicat]

3 hours ago, Quof said:

People do stupid things and think I can undo it.   If they had only asked me beforehand, I would have told them not to do it.  

This is totally my son's job description (he works for a large law firm that in addition to other things also provides legal assistance for people that can't afford to hire a lawyer for civil cases.)

My job for over 30 years (until April 2019): I tempt people into switching jobs so that their new company will send me lots and lots of money. (Yes, I had big fun, why do you ask? :)

 

[ratgirlagogo]

Gee what was my job?

Combination Jeopardy contestant, fast food restaurant worker, warehouse worker, social worker. Children's theatre performer (storytelling, puppet theater, singalong and dance leader). Computer instructor to senior citizens, homeless people, ex-offenders,  very recent immigrants.  Cheating assistant to school children (Cliff's Notes, Spark Notes, MasterPlots) and older students.  Friendly ear to those who have outlived their friends/family, as well as homeless people who are never spoken to otherwise.  Provider of internet access to those who could never afford to pay for it.  Nimble assistant to those looking for jobs, or looking for deserved public assistance.

 An intellectual friend with whom to discuss family geneology research or military history, and any kind of intellectual activity (like reading, not just philosophy or science but poetry and novels) that isn't shared by their friends and family - most of whom like the  person who appreciates the friendly ear haven't read for pleasure since they were in high school.  The person that can recommend a book to someone who hasn't read a book for pleasure since they were in high school.

The person who listens to the patrons and tries to keep the books, CDs and DVDs in stock that they ask for.

 

Damn, I loved being a public librarian in a big city.  Everything but the money, of course.  I read on other message boards what younger people consider basic entry level salaries and I have to pull back from feeling embarrassed at how little I made, and make through my pension.  I have no regrets.  It was a privilege.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited May 26, 2021 by ratgirlagogo

[Mindthinkr]

Mine is so hard to describe without giving it away. I see messy things, smell foul odors, listen to people telling their problems, and spend most of my time doing paperwork describing the above. Then I tell their problems to a person who comes in and looks at them for 5 minutes. This Demi-god is allowed to say what those issues are and then tells me how to fix them. Then I do. 

[ABay]

I sit at a desk and point to objects that are well-marked and visible and that the questioner would see for their self if they opened their damned eyes. I also answer stupid questions for people outside of my organization who somehow found me but couldn't find Google.

[Callietwo]

 I write documents for clients that help them describe what they do/did for work and letters that tell how that work qualifies them for whatever might come next. 

I teach them how to answer stupid questions so they can do new or different work.  I teach them how to deal with stupid bosses and coworkers so they keep being allowed to go back day after day without being told to get lost. 

I report my results to overlords that think they are the rulers in charge of our lands showing I've had the mandated results enough that I can keep doing it again next month and next month and so on and so forth.  

[Abra]

I ask people who have agreed to do work for my company for free to actually sign up and do the work they've agreed to do for free.

[Quof]

16 hours ago, Callietwo said:

 I write documents for clients that help them describe what they do/did for work

So you should be really good at answering this Question of the Day.

[ebk57]

I pay bills for rich people.  With their money, not mine, so it's okay. 

[JTMacc99]

 

 For me it is 4, provided I can hit that 0.7 second window between 3 and "on fire".

[Browncoat]

Halfway between 3 and 4.  The outside has to be nicely brown (but not too brown), and the inside all melty and stuff. 

[Ohiopirate02]

I prefer #5,  I want the crispy outside and gooey inside.  And who doesn't love setting it on fire and quickly blowing it out??

[Bastet]

I don't particularly care for marshmallows, but if I was with people who were sitting around a fire roasting them, I'd eat one - a 4.5.

[ABay]

6. Burn, baby, burn.

[MargeGunderson]

I’m with @Bastet - 4.5 is the sweet spot. But I would eat a 4 or a 5.

[jennifer6973]

6 definitely.  Love them burnt to a crisp.

[Maisiesmom]

I vote for # 3 I don't like them burnt.

[Abra]

6. Plus I don't have the patience for a slow roast, just set it on fire!

[DearEvette]

I like it crispy with a little char on the outside but all melty-gooey on the inside  So #5 on this but in reality I'd remove it from the fire a scosh before five -- like others have stated above more like a 4.5.

[Mindthinkr]

I’m in the 4.5 range as well. I can’t even recall the last time I had one. 

[isalicat]

#4 or #5 would be fine for me but strictly on a S'more....I don't like marshmellows without the "trimmings" :)

[festivus]

Burn. It. Give me the 6 baby.

[SoMuchTV]

Wow I wasn’t going to bother with this one but now I feel I need to represent. #3 for sure, but anything 2 through 4 would be acceptable. The charcoal lovers are strong here!

[ohjoy]

Pretty much the only time I like marshmallows is in s’mores, so I’m good anywhere from 4 to 6 — I need the marshmallow heat to melt that chocolate. The char just adds extra flavor.

[jewel21]

Number 3, although the last time I ever toasted a marshmallow was when I was like 9 years old and I kept churning out 6s much to my uncles delight, heh. I didn't care for marshmallows so I just gave him all of mine. 

[shapeshifter]

10 hours ago, JTMacc99 said:

 

 For me it is 4, provided I can hit that 0.7 second window between 3 and "on fire".

It’s probably been over 50 years, but I think it was a 3 so it didn’t fall off the stick. 
Like @Bastet, I would be willing to have one. 
 

[ratgirlagogo]

My favorite would have to be whatever the person next to me wants, so I could give it to them.  I fucking HATE marshmallows (yes s'mores also) and have no idea how they ever became some kind of standard campsite treat.

[KWalkerInc]

I think I'd only be like a 2.  This is probably because I can't remember the last time I had s'mores in anything other than the microwave, and even that was almost 20 years ago.

[Stats Queen]

#6 no question. Burned on the outside, yummy on the inside.

[JTMacc99]

[Annber03]

Ice cream sandwich or a fudge pop :). 

[Browncoat]

Fudge pop.  

[SweetieDarling]

King Cone

 

[Leeds]

King cone (though this comes with the risk that the cone is stale).

[DearEvette]

Me today would be the simple ice cream sandwich.  

But my 10 year old self — The strawberry shortcake.  Man, there was something about that artificial strawberry taste and that cookie/cake crumbled coating that was sublime to me!

[ABay]

King Kone...but what's in a chocolate eclair because that sounds good.

[partofme]

Fudge pop

[ebk57]

When I was a kid, we were only allowed to get the Fudge Pop since it was a nickel.  I always wanted the Chocolate Eclair, but it was a dime, so no go.

So I'd get the Chocolate Eclair.  I'm sure it tastes awful, but I'd get it anyway, dammit! 

[shapeshifter]

Ice cream sandwich because it's a little less messy, and I'm not familiar with a lot of the others or don't care for them.

[theredhead77]

Childhood me would get the snocone. Grown up me will get the Chipwich. BRB, gotta go to Trader Joe's to get a box of their Chipwiches!

[jennifer6973]

Chipwich, king kona or chocolate taco

[Bastet]

Chipwich, hands down.  In my early 20s (when I had metabolism for days), my co-workers knew that if I made a 3:00 run to the commissary for onion rings, I was having a bad day and needed the pick-me-up, and if I grabbed a chipwich out of the vending machine, I was celebrating a good day.

I'm actually rather uninterested in most of those, and would have been as a kid, too - I've always been more excited by salty, crunchy treats than sweets.  And, come to think of it, I'm not sure I ever purchased something from an ice cream truck.  But my parents had a motorhome, so we went camping at least one weekend a month, and I was always allowed to go buy a treat from the campground store once a day.  That's what I associate these things with.  (We occasionally had them in the freezer at home, but it's primarily a campground thing to me.)

Of that list, the only other ones that I like/sound good (many I'm unfamiliar with) are:

- Ice cream sandwich (that was my childhood choice before I discovered the chipwich, and remains my second choice)
- Drumstick (they're okay; I don't really like nuts [which I love] mixing in with my chocolate, so the top part was something to get through and enjoy the rest, especially the ones that have more chocolate down at the tip of the cone)
- King Cone (never heard of it, but looks good).

I hate Snow Cones, for the same reason I hate blended margaritas or other cocktails - the texture.  I remember tasting a friend's Fudge Pop and disliking it.

[Caoimhe]

Cornetto, which appears to be called King Cone.

[isalicat]

Chipwich but it has to be an Its It! Trader Joe's version is not bad, but nothing beats an Its It.