Season 5 Discussion

[Lily247]

14 hours ago, Mu Shu said:

In Islamic culture, women from good families who have comfortable finances and who are virgins are at a premium.  It’s possible that Azan, like many Islamic males desires a certified virgin, but can’t pay the dowry.  He’s probably not thrilled with the women his family can afford.   Then comes Nicole.  I imagine he’ll rethink the offers he’s had after seeing The Terrible Toddler who ate Tokyo.   Come on honey, you just need to do some work outs!

Im not so sure ... Azan's seems to come from a good family and a comfortable home, he doesnt seem trashy. He just seems like he saw many other Moroccan men scamming American/European women and decided to take it up an do the same before ultimately settling down with a Moroccan woman in his country. 

[LocalGovt]

On 12/18/2017 at 8:00 PM, calpurnia99 said:

She is supposed to be going to college to experience her first time living away from home! To see what it is like to live away from home, to make friends, to have experiences. It is just wrong that her first apt is one with her husband, like they did in the 1950's. David has lived alone in his own places before. That is why she was so excited at that house. I was the same way at 19 looking at my first off-campus apartment, I was like WOW my own house!

I just am shaking my head that she blew off college. And she has no career either, She is going to be a wife and mom, yay. 

Not everyone wants to go to college. There's nothing wrong with that.

As for going away to have "experiences".....as the mother of two tween girls, I don't want them going away to have "experiences", to be honest. Well, let me rephrase that....experiences, like, cultural experiences? Yes, sure.  Wild drinking games, mindless sexual experiences? No.

On 12/18/2017 at 8:58 PM, Bridget said:

Preach! It's sad, but it's the new reality. It's why there is a huge literacy decline in the school system. These kids can't communicate like "normal people."

Anyone else catch this Fine Parenting Moment of the Year moment?

Could her fingers BE any feckin' closer to the open electrical sockets?

Holy Shit. 

We don't really know how much time May is spending with a device (although it does seem to be pretty handy) -- only what we are "shown".

I got the impression that they used the device and headphones as a way to have an adult conversation, without May overhearing it. 

[sainte-chapelle]

I am sad this is over, I only watch for this board and all the glorious snark. Onto 600lb life and 'so fabulous ' Whitney who I hate watch.

Edited December 21, 2017 by sainte-chapelle

[Mr. Miner]

Molly looked like an overgrown toddler that just got bucked off a mechanical bull.

[sasha206]

12 hours ago, alegtostandon said:

Now I need to say this in defense of my dad because I cannot stand the thought  of anyone thinking my dad was anything like Dough Boy David...my dad was an executive with a major pharmaceutical company. He left my mom after beginning an affair with a female executive at the same company. He married her a month after my parents 20 year marriage ended. At the wedding ceremony, the comment was made "how nice it is to see Don finally happy.".  This was from others who only knew him from work, was not involved in our daily family life, which, until he left, we all...including my mom...thought was TV show perfect. Obviously, their marriage was not.  To hear that being said, in front of his 4 kids (oldest 16, youngest 6) made us feel like he was unhappy with us. 

My dad never pulled a Poor David Pour (PDP) he was always very involved in our lives, paid child support & alimony. 

Speaking of David Pour..he sure did knock them back...at his Sugar Daddy, Chris's, insistence.  PDP should have changed their wedding. I'm sure he did not realize (read...remember) that was his daughters birthday. If he really wanted to try to mend fences with her, he would have changed it to the week before, then done something special for her birthday, sounds like he's "missed" (read...forgotten),a few for both of his kids.

My DVR cut off before the ending...was Azin ever located? 

Sorry!  Wasn't trying to equate your dad with David Pour!  I just was talking about her hurt as a result of the consequences of her dad's actions.  

1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

Well, she was worried to death about May, I dont think there are many grandmothers who could just go to the beach without a care in the world when their toddler granddaughter is in a foreign country where who knows what could happen, being babysat by a strange family whom you've never met. I think that Robbalee isn't tough enough on Nicole, not nearly at all. She should be instructing Nicole to keep herself off the internet dating and getting an education to better her and May's lives, or at least try to get better employment, as well as take her to a nutirionist stat before it's too late. From the way Nicole speaks to her mother - with absolutely zero respect, demanding her mother to be quiet like she were talking to a small child - shows the power dynamic between them and that Nicole is in charge and wheedles what she wants from her. Nicole desperately needs some tough love in her life a little kick in the butt to open her eyes and see she is wasting her time with all this dating. It boggles my mind that Robbalee continues to give her money when she knows Nicole is sending it to Azan. SMDH that she gives all that money away when she is a single mom. We dont see her dad that much but he may not have as close a relationship to Nicole as she does with her mom, what we did see was him agreeing to sponsor Azan, another parenting fail. :o By the way I do think that Azan is a complete piece of garbage after I heard he keeps accepting money all the time from Nicole, both by her and his testimony. 

I agree that Robbalee isn't tough enough on Nicole but I wouldn't equate being at the beach as not having a care in the world.  What is she to do when Nicole is chasing fuckboy?  Stay in the house and worry 24/7?  Sometimes when life is rough, you need a day at the beach to get through life itself.

[merylinkid]

10 hours ago, ALittleShelfish said:

And my divorce lawyer told me I wasn't even the dumbest person he'd ever represented, so there's that.  (YAY ME!)

Oh trust me you are not.   You made one mistake, you corrected it.   The dumbest ones are the ones who get divorced, then 3 months later marry the next guy they met on the internet, rinse repeat.    As I tell my clients, I do not have a buy 2 divorces, get the third one free offer.

[Suzywriter]

1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

Well, she was worried to death about May, I dont think there are many grandmothers who could just go to the beach without a care in the world when their toddler granddaughter is in a foreign country where who knows what could happen, being babysat by a strange family whom you've never met. I think that Robbalee isn't tough enough on Nicole, not nearly at all. She should be instructing Nicole to keep herself off the internet dating and getting an education to better her and May's lives, or at least try to get better employment, as well as take her to a nutirionist stat before it's too late. From the way Nicole speaks to her mother - with absolutely zero respect, demanding her mother to be quiet like she were talking to a small child - shows the power dynamic between them and that Nicole is in charge and wheedles what she wants from her. Nicole desperately needs some tough love in her life a little kick in the butt to open her eyes and see she is wasting her time with all this dating. It boggles my mind that Robbalee continues to give her money when she knows Nicole is sending it to Azan. SMDH that she gives all that money away when she is a single mom. We dont see her dad that much but he may not have as close a relationship to Nicole as she does with her mom, what we did see was him agreeing to sponsor Azan, another parenting fail. :o By the way I do think that Azan is a complete piece of garbage after I heard he keeps accepting money all the time from Nicole, both by her and his testimony. 

Itit is not the idea of requiring more from Nicole that I object to. It is the nonstop criticizing and projection that is the issue. 

A worried grandparent--and I am one--can still balance the negative comments with a kind demeanor. A parent can also say "Honey, if you spent your whole check already, you'll have to walk to work until you get paid again." instead of giving her gas money and then criticizing the recipient for taking it. 

As a grandparent who HAS dealt with this stuff, yes, you CAN go to the beach or do something else when the grandkids' parents make stupid choices. Fretting and making stuff up about "what if" is a way of reinforcing one's belief that they are indispensible.

 

Case in point: the family complained that it was wrong when Nicole went to Africa the first time to see Azan, leaving May safely in the US with her aunt.  When Nicole said that her next trip would include May instead of leaving her with family, Robbalee tried to override that decision with "No!" and a lot of what ifs and dire predictions.

So if Nicole travels without her child, she gets lip and accused of selfishness and neglect. If she travels with her child, she gets accused of "taking the child away from her family" and putting her in danger. Nicole gets flack either way, and The Robbalee Posse gets to feel superior.

 

This is textbook stuff in the world of addiction and mental health. Robbalee is a bully and a martyr whose self worth is wrapped up in proving that she is needed. They are also training May to look down on her mother, as they all prattle on in front of the child about their nonstop contempt for everything Nicole does.

Nicole needs to get away from those people. 

[sasha206]

3 hours ago, Suzywriter said:

Shouldn't that advice apply to The Robbalee Posse?

 

The Possee gives neither nice treatment nor respect, and they gang up on her. Maybe that is why they get tantrums from Nicole. I wouldn't be nice to them, either.

 

Little brother would have been told to get a job and raise a kid of his own before giving so much advice about things he's never done. He could maybe give himself advice to lay off the Twinkies and hit the gym while he's replanning Nicole's life.

 

Nicole's father and stepmother seem to be able to be civil, kind, and respectful. They can say "Hello" with a smile, and make pleasant comments. That doesn't make them pushovers. It makes them empathetic and caring instead of a superior snarkfactory.

 

What respect does Nicole deserve?  And why should little brother withhold is absolutely correct opinion about May being told each fuckmate is "daddy"?  You don't have to be a parent to know that is off the charts wrong and damaging to a child.  

What is it you expect this family to do when Nicole comes back complaining that the trip didn't go as planned, that she's been told she's unattractive, and then is sending that man money she could be better served GOING TO HER CHILD.  Nicole isn't coming back talking about how lovely Azan is to her and that it is indeed true love.  Nicole seems to know the score with Azan but she seems hell bent in marrying someone with six pack abs.

I'm not sure why you feel sorry for this manipulative, abusive, impulsive, overgrown toddler.  

Edited December 21, 2017 by sasha206

[Suzywriter]

3 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

 

What respect does Nicole deserve?  And why should little brother withhold is absolutely correct opinion about May being told each fuckmate is "daddy"?  You don't have to be a parent to know that is off the charts wrong and damaging to a child.  

What is it you expect this family to do when Nicole comes back complaining that the trip didn't go as planned, that she's been told she's unattractive, and then is sending that man money she could be better served GOING TO HER CHILD.

I'm not sure why you feel sorry for this manipulative, abusive, impulsive, overgrown toddler.

What I am saying is that two wrongs don't make a right. They all need Al-anon.

[sasha206]

Just now, Suzywriter said:

What I am saying is that two wrongs don't make a right. They all need Al-anon.

Well, you are right about that.  I mean, on some level, I do think her parents created the monster by never saying no to her.

[Suzywriter]

20 hours ago, CoachWristletJen said:

Absolutely right!

That being said, I'm starting to wonder if perhaps Nicole had serious developmental delays that went undiagnosed. At the risk of sounding judgmental, a child her age SHOULD have been diagnosed if the parents were paying attention!

When a child has delays, sensory-motor integration problems, whatever it is, it's up to the parents to find out what those are, and learn how to parent differently. It's highly rare to not have more than one teacher along the line make that suggestion, usually as early as kindergarten, where the child's struggles will make him or her a standout.

Maybe all Nicole's parents ever did was learn to express criticism and frustration with her behaviors. (And, if a child has problems with impulse control, it's not easy. However, given a calm environment, they can achieve wonders and find a meaningful place in society. A good job where they don't punch the boss in the face, etc.)

Sadly, now Nicole is an adult. It's not "too late" if she wants help instead of D.  Seems like the family has given up on her and circled their wagons around May although they've yet to really help May in a meaningful way other than extended babysitting, which can actually be good if it keeps Mommy's frustration level down.

Now Grandma is looking at this helpless child in the hands of the daughter she's created, and her negative behaviors have escalated. I don't think we've even seen the cruelest of Grandma's behaviors on TV. That just occurred to me.

Calling Dr. Phil! There's an emergency! Come right away! (Doesn't work. His name doesn't rhyme with Bombay.)

I also wondered about developmental delays. There is something odd about her expression, like she is struggling with processing language. 

How about "Dr. Phil, Dr. Phil! Lunatics abound! TLC will foot the bill!"

[Normades]

3 hours ago, Suzywriter said:

Shouldn't that advice apply to The Robbalee Posse?

 

The Possee gives neither nice treatment nor respect, and they gang up on her. Maybe that is why they get tantrums from Nicole. I wouldn't be nice to them, either.

 

Little brother would have been told to get a job and raise a kid of his own before giving so much advice about things he's never done. He could maybe give himself advice to lay off the Twinkies and hit the gym while he's replanning Nicole's life.

 

Nicole's father and stepmother seem to be able to be civil, kind, and respectful. They can say "Hello" with a smile, and make pleasant comments. That doesn't make them pushovers. It makes them empathetic and caring instead of a superior snarkfactory.

I haven't seen Nicole's mother be rude to Nicole.  I have seen Nicole be rude the them.  She barks at her mother to shut up about the truth of her situation and she drops her latest insanity on them then sits back and smirks while they worry about HER child.  If poor Nicole is treated so horribly by her mother and family, she has the option of taking responsibility for her child, getting a decent paying job and not involving them.  Oh, but that would be HAAARRRRDDD!  I don't blame her mother for being upset that Nicole was leaving her little girl for 3 weeks in her sister's care and then for taking the child to a foreign country for a couple of months.  What a responsible parent would do is care about the child first and not involve them in this insanity.  She should be putting her desire for a love life on hold to care for May's needs.  Look where her decisions have taken her so far.  There are more things to life than a hot guy.

As far as her brother goes, we don't know if he has a job or is in school, but from his demeanor I would bet he is doing something worthwhile.  I don't think you have to raise a child to see what's wrong with Nicole's parenting.  Nicole should take the advice you give for her brother:  get a job, raise your child, lay off the twinkies and hit the gym.

Her father and stepmother were a fail.  They played right in to Nicole's manipulation.  Where is their empathy and caring for poor little May.  Without some boundaries Nicole will continue her awful behavior.  She is trash.

[jackjill89]

12 hours ago, Real Eyes said:

Nicole's parents can't just cut her off to sink and swim.  That would be easy to do if she didn't have a child, but she has a child her parents love, and they want the best for May.  

Why can't they? I don't think it would take long for Nicole to come back, tail between her legs. At that point, they could set up some real boundaries. 

It wouldn't be easy. But if they could suck it up and do it, it would probably be the best thing for all of them.

They won't though, and the family will keep up this ridiculous, damaging song and dance. May is going to grow up to be every bit as lazy, entitled and spoiled as her mom. 

[Mrs. Hanson]

16 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

I mean, on some level, I do think her parents created the monster by never saying no to her.

And I get to work with kids whose parents can't say no either and it is a joy ride!!!  LOL!  

 

6 minutes ago, Suzywriter said:

I also wondered about developmental delays

She has always struck me as a lower IQ gal but not developmentally delayed.  A person who is not college material but can go to a trade school (beauty school, be a vet tech, something like that) but not a powerhouse career.  But she will be unable to do that as she is lazy.  (I am not picking on hairstylists, I considered it heavily back in the day.  I still wish I had followed through!)  She can focus when it is about HER (her love of Azan's ab's seems to be motivating!) but other things, for the long term?  Nope, not interested.  May is three now?  Have you thought about preschools, Nicole?  No?  What a shocker.

[Normades]

3 minutes ago, jackjill89 said:

Why can't they? I don't think it would take long for Nicole to come back, tail between her legs. At that point, they could set up some real boundaries. 

It wouldn't be easy. But if they could suck it up and do it, it would probably be the best thing for all of them.

They won't though, and the family will keep up this ridiculous, damaging song and dance. May is going to grow up to be every bit as lazy, entitled and spoiled as her mom. 

I agree they need to cut her off.  It will be hard for May and they would have to try to keep an eye on her.  They could drop healthy food off so that the little one won't starve, plus no worries about Nicole eating healthy food!  I think a short time of this would end up with Nicole coming back for help.  At that point, I think they should negotiate guardianship over May.  Then Nicole wouldn't have her bargaining chip to hang over their heads.  Of course, future children from Nicole will always be an issue, and as much as I wish it weren't the case, I believe she will have more children.  I'm sure she did everything she could to have a little Azan.  Thankfully, it seems Azan avoided that.

[Suzywriter]

11 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Well, you are right about that.  I mean, on some level, I do think her parents created the monster by never saying no to her.

More likely, by rescuing and fixing rather than teaching her necessary life skills. Robbalee seems to think that a constant stream of negativity  and public shaming ("How much did you send Azan *this* month?) is the same as teaching her daughter how to avoid making the same mistake again.

Maybe say "Hey Nicole, I have an idea. Let's go buy a $40 gas card when you get paid, so you will be sure to have gas money put aside for the week." instead of watching her overspend and then badmouthing her while giving her money to make up the deficit. 

[KateHearts]

On 12/19/2017 at 2:06 AM, Suzywriter said:

Does anyone else feel kind of sorry for Nicole? She looks so forlorn and unhappy most of the time, and her family does nothing but tear her down and demand that she answer  their dire predictions. The mom seemed like she was trying to be humiliating on the tell-all.

Obviously Mom had a lot of dirt on her that she was kind of awfully gleeful to have. I can understand, though, that her family must be so fed up with what is likely a series of "true loves," dragging poor May into her drama, turning to them for money for every little need, and her stubborn reluctance to look at anything from a practical point of view.  Who has a child and a potential mate to support, works for peanuts and says "I haven't thought about how I will support us"?

I was having a hard time looking at Evelyn's blaring red giant lips. It reminded me of the laser we use in the operating room- don't look! You'll go blind!

I can't get over my feeling that Chris has something missing in his brain. He almost acts like he's had a head injury. Every response is delayed, and he starts out with a blank facial expression like he has to take a beat to decipher what's being asked. And what was the comment, "I like to give a hand UP, not a handout."  Straight out of a United Way commercial. Talking about how he funded David Poor so that "I could travel and do what I want to do"?  Does that make nonsense to anyone else?  I'm guessing he needed someone who had a lot of time (i.e., unemployed and no family to feel obligated to) to help him rack up hooker encounters in foreign countries?  I couldn't get over Nikki and her slouched over, arm-grabbing posture the entire time they were interviewed- and Chris' flat non-reaction to her constant barbs about his "best friend" and Chris himself.  It was all too weird.

Luis' smarmy smile while watching the video of him and Molly at their worst was cringe-worthy. He is obviously having a grand time rehashing the mess, and has no insight into how scummy it makes him look. But I agree with others- he was forced back to her home under duress and playing the role of dutiful husband because he realizes that's the only way he can stay here.  But Molly, girl- at what price did you convince yourself this was "true love"? And please- your daughters are at the bottom rung of your priority ladder.  You're pathetic.

So many opportunities for Shaun to hit hard with the questions. She'd get close and then disappoint... asking Nicole about money to Azan but not about the physical altercations.  Not asking Molly why she would want someone in her home who clearly has no interest in her children. They need a new host.

[Adiba]

9 minutes ago, Suzywriter said:

More likely, by rescuing and fixing rather than teaching her necessary life skills. Robbalee seems to think that a constant stream of negativity  and public shaming ("How much did you send Azan *this* month?) is the same as teaching her daughter how to avoid making the same mistake again.

Maybe say "Hey Nicole, I have an idea. Let's go buy a $40 gas card when you get paid, so you will be sure to have gas money put aside for the week." instead of watching her overspend and then badmouthing her while giving her money to make up the deficit. 

 

Perhaps they have tried this approach in the past and it did not work? I don't think Nicole is the sharpest tool in the shed, but I don't think she is below average IQ, jmo. She seems smart enough to maybe trade or sell a gift card at a discount for cash.

Nicole strikes me as someone with a toddler emotional development--who may be oppositional no matter how fair and reasonable a compromise may be, she'll want her way--just because.

I don't think Nicole is unteachable, but the learning may have to come from a third party (not her mother) or from like's hard knocks in order to sink in.

Edited December 21, 2017 by Adiba
double quote

[sasha206]

28 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

And I get to work with kids whose parents can't say no either and it is a joy ride!!!  LOL!  

 

I can't even imagine!  You are a saint!

[Zazie]

I have to ask. I'm italian and I live in Italy, so I know very little about american stuff. Shawn Robinson. Is she famous? Why? Really. Why? 

[Normades]

20 minutes ago, Suzywriter said:

Nicole has a job, and you are missing the point.

A part time barista job that she leaves for months at a time to chase men is not really going to afford her the ability to raise a child and support herself.  And I don't think I've missed the point at all, but thanks for the concern.

[winsomeone]

Nicole seems to have an iPhone? If so, her mother must be paying for that, as her part time minimum wage job surely isn't. If someone just had the guts to disconnect that phone, it sure would solve a heck of a lot of problems right away. Also, she can't just decide to move permanently to Morocco any more than Azan can decide on his own to move here. That government surely would not want her and her daughter to live there when she has no means to support herself, and Azan will be long gone once she is penniless.

[AZChristian]

The Nicole family dynamic is bad.  I doubt they can "fix" it without professional help.  But they would ALL have to participate, and they would ALL have to be willing to change their non-productive cycle of behavior.

TBH, I fear what would happen to May if Robalee and the rest of the family were to completely cut Nicole off financially, and/or stop enabling her.  If Nicole hasn't learned by now that her behaviors are inappropriate, she either can't or won't change without intervention.  She'll keep "upping the ante" . . . and May is her only bargaining chip.  If the family puts their collective foot down and stops giving Nicole money, signing papers to sponsor someone for 10 years, baby-sitting May whenever Nicole wants . . . Nicole could go "all-in" and risk May's health and/or safety by completely separating her from the family.  Least offensive - the child will have nothing but french fries to eat for the next several years.  Most concerning - completely neglecting her while Nicole is out "earning money" in other ways.  Sadly, CPS won't do anything until May is in documentable danger.  Their response is often "we've seen worse" until that is no longer true.

Nicole definitely has something wrong with her thought process if - in her 20s - she still uses the "I'll hold my breath until I turn blue" level of manipulation, and then physically attacks someone who refuses to sit in a room with her while she tries to manipulate them.  Her physical and emotional responses are no more mature than May's.  

TLC needs to cut the supply line of money to Nicole.  None of us want to watch her continue to manipulate, bully, and con her way through life.

9 minutes ago, winsomeone said:

Nicole seems to have an iPhone? If so, her mother must be paying for that, as her part time minimum wage job surely isn't. If someone just had the guts to disconnect that phone, it sure would solve a heck of a lot of problems right away. Also, she can't just decide to move permanently to Morocco any more than Azan can decide on his own to move here. That government surely would not want her and her daughter to live there when she has no means to support herself, and Azan will be long gone once she is penniless.

Good idea on disconnecting the phone!  Get her a basic "dumb phone" without internet access.  She'd have to go to a library or something to use a free computer, and it would take her months to figure out where the nearest library is.

And I think Azan wants to be long gone from her whether Nicole is penniless or not.  I assume TLC was going to pay him for his time on the tell-all, and he didn't "show up" . . . so he wouldn't have been paid for that.  Stick a fork in him.  He's done with Nicole.

[annewithaneee]

38 minutes ago, KateHearts said:

On 12/19/2017 at 2:06 AM, Suzywriter said:

Does anyone else feel kind of sorry for Nicole? She looks so forlorn and unhappy most of the time, and her family does nothing but tear her down and demand that she answer  their dire predictions. The mom seemed like she was trying to be humiliating on the tell-all.

Obviously Mom had a lot of dirt on her that she was kind of awfully gleeful to have. I can understand, though, that her family must be so fed up with what is likely a series of "true loves," dragging poor May into her drama, turning to them for money for every little need, and her stubborn reluctance to look at anything from a practical point of view.  Who has a child and a potential mate to support, works for peanuts and says "I haven't thought about how I will support us"?

It really wasn't a good look on Robbalee. I think that's what finally brought me out of "I'm so glad somebody's telling Nicole how fucked everything she's doing is" and realizing that as an actual family, they're not great. I could get the first answer about the money-wiring. But as her daughter regressed into whining and repeatedly begging her to stop answering, she should have stopped, but she seemed thrilled to keep barreling on. And not in a tough love way. She seemed to be relishing the chance to embarrass Nicole. 

In this situation, the actual tough love approach would include not appearing on any seasons of 90DF since her first one. Don't support the toxic relationship, Nicole's fame-seeking, take away a good portion of her potential storyline and possibly make it so she doesn't get asked back. Continuing to participate just to shame and embarrass her...makes it seem like they enjoy being on TV too, especially since they get to be in the right. I mean, on some level they probably do need to continue with financial and childcare assistance for May's sake. They definitely don't need to be on this show, though.

Ultimately, somebody needs to chase at least Nicole and Robbalee into some therapy, maybe her dad too. There are some deeply ingrained patterns on all sides there that are so harmful.

[Suzywriter]

11 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

The Nicole family dynamic is bad.  I doubt they can "fix" it without professional help.  But they would ALL have to participate, and they would ALL have to be willing to change their non-productive cycle of behavior.

TBH, I fear what would happen to May if Robalee and the rest of the family were to completely cut Nicole off financially, and/or stop enabling her.  If Nicole hasn't learned by now that her behaviors are inappropriate, she either can't or won't change without intervention.  She'll keep "upping the ante" . . . and May is her only bargaining chip.  If the family puts their collective foot down and stops giving Nicole money, signing papers to sponsor someone for 10 years, baby-sitting May whenever Nicole wants . . . Nicole could go "all-in" and risk May's health and/or safety by completely separating her from the family.  Least offensive - the child will have nothing but french fries to eat for the next several years.  Most concerning - completely neglecting her while Nicole is out "earning money" in other ways.  Sadly, CPS won't do anything until May is in documentable danger.  Their response is often "we've seen worse" until that is no longer true.

Nicole definitely has something wrong with her thought process if - in her 20s - she still uses the "I'll hold my breath until I turn blue" level of manipulation, and then physically attacks someone who refuses to sit in a room with her while she tries to manipulate them.  Her physical and emotional responses are no more mature than May's.  

TLC needs to cut the supply line of money to Nicole.  None of us want to watch her continue to manipulate, bully, and con her way through life.

Good idea on disconnecting the phone!  Get her a basic "dumb phone" without internet access.  She'd have to go to a library or something to use a free computer, and it would take her months to figure out where the nearest library is.

And I think Azan wants to be long gone from her whether Nicole is penniless or not.  I assume TLC was going to pay him for his time on the tell-all, and he didn't "show up" . . . so he wouldn't have been paid for that.  Stick a fork in him.  He's done with Nicole.

TLC totally set up the no-show drama to lure us to watch the 3-hour rehash the next night. It worked, too.

[Pepper Mostly]

12 hours ago, PamelaMaeSnap said:

I just set my TV to record My 600-lb Life so I can continue to hang with the cool kids. Like many of you, the constant plugs for that small handful of shows that start in January all tempt me so I can have a wide range of junk to binge on ... I had been thinking about watching Jazz from the beginning and then being caught up for next season because it's intriguing to me but I will take your collective advice that the show sucks and is not worth investing what little brain power I have left (time, I've got ... memory and brain waves,  not so much). 

I also tend to find Say Yes To The Dress fun gobbledygook, especially since my daughter has no intention of buying a wedding dress when her big day comes, leaving me bereft without getting to take a trip to Kleinfeld or some good vintage stores in LA (I'm half-kidding). 

If only they'd bring back "Toddlers and Tiaras" or "Show Biz Moms and Dads." Now THOSE were good times (though I suspect Glark would disagree) 

I'll see you all on the My 600 Pound Life forum! I watched Jazz for a season or two but her mother drives me right up the wall, so I can't go back. I love SYTTD for the snark factor. I just sit there wondering how these women can be so silly and vapid. And does anyone know any words other than "wow factor" or "bling".

Show Biz Moms and Dads! That forum on TWOP was LIFE. Big in Belgium! How I would love to see that show come back. And what are the Nutters up to these days?

[Lily247]

1 hour ago, Suzywriter said:

Itit is not the idea of requiring more from Nicole that I object to. It is the nonstop criticizing and projection that is the issue. 

A worried grandparent--and I am one--can still balance the negative comments with a kind demeanor. A parent can also say "Honey, if you spent your whole check already, you'll have to walk to work until you get paid again." instead of giving her gas money and then criticizing the recipient for taking it. 

As a grandparent who HAS dealt with this stuff, yes, you CAN go to the beach or do something else when the grandkids' parents make stupid choices. Fretting and making stuff up about "what if" is a way of reinforcing one's belief that they are indispensible.

 

Case in point: the family complained that it was wrong when Nicole went to Africa the first time to see Azan, leaving May safely in the US with her aunt.  When Nicole said that her next trip would include May instead of leaving her with family, Robbalee tried to override that decision with "No!" and a lot of what ifs and dire predictions.

So if Nicole travels without her child, she gets lip and accused of selfishness and neglect. If she travels with her child, she gets accused of "taking the child away from her family" and putting her in danger. Nicole gets flack either way, and The Robbalee Posse gets to feel superior.

 

This is textbook stuff in the world of addiction and mental health. Robbalee is a bully and a martyr whose self worth is wrapped up in proving that she is needed. They are also training May to look down on her mother, as they all prattle on in front of the child about their nonstop contempt for everything Nicole does.

Nicole needs to get away from those people. 

I would take a guess that they dont want her traveling to Morocco period, with or without May, Somebody is paying for the airline tickets - and May is over 2 so she is a full ticket herself. I would guess TLC production pays for it because no way would Nicole afford it, that's probably a month of her wages. If I were Robbalee I just simply wouldnt help her at all moneywise. Nicole does need to get on her own, but she cant because she needs the money and child care help. The only way is to stop with the dating and try to work harder on other aspects of her life. Im just going to say that if I were Nicole, my mother would never speak to me the way Robbalee speaks to her. IMO Robbalee criticizes, but does so in this gentle, quiet voice; my mother would throw down the house yelling at me. I feel so bad for Robbalee that she lets her daughter walk all over her and bully her. I do think that it looks like Robbalee might have had some sort of a stroke, and so she may not have the strength to raise her voice or argue against Nicole.

[gonecrackers]

I agree with you reg. "experiences" @LocalGovt.

I think the picture was pointing out that May is sleeping right next to an exposed outlet. As a safety freak that horrified me. She could hit it even by accident in her sleep. Plastic covers for outlets are widely & easily available, so there's no excuse for this.

[Mrs. Hanson]

12 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

I can't even imagine!  You are a saint!

Aw shucks....thanks!  I am a special ed teacher, too.  I work with kids who, for the most part, have parents who don't parent.  They let them do what they want, then they come to school and are like, rules??  What rules?  (Funny...I have zero trouble setting limits.  It was one of my favorite things to do as a parent.)

[Suzywriter]

1 hour ago, Adiba said:

 

Perhaps they have tried this approach in the past and it did not work? I don't think Nicole is the sharpest tool in the shed, but I don't think she is below average IQ, jmo. She seems smart enough to maybe trade or sell a gift card at a discount for cash.

Nicole strikes me as someone with a toddler emotional development--who may be oppositional no matter how fair and reasonable a compromise may be, she'll want her way--just because.

I don't think Nicole is unteachable, but the learning may have to come from a third party (not her mother) or from like's hard knocks in order to sink in.

Lol..if she traded the gas card, she could then choose which shoes to wear to walk.

 

My mother once offered me a trash bag of deposit bottles to trade for bus fare when I ran out of gas money. I declined and was all kinds of indignant at the "craziness" of my mother for making such an offer.  I walked that week and never forgot to make gas money a priority again.

It was a decade before I realized that mom wasn't mean or crazy. She was teaching me to be responsible, and it worked!

[Pondlass1]

14 minutes ago, winsomeone said:

Also, she can't just decide to move permanently to Morocco any more than Azan can decide on his own to move here.

This was my thinking also.  I don't know why this isn't brought up by the parents when she holds the threat over them. You can't just take off and live in another country, especially a Muslim country with strict religious laws that must be obeyed. And Azan is not going to marry Nicole and live in Morocco.  What would he gain from that?  Especially as I have sense he might be gay... which would be his only reason for seeking to live in the US.

Also, if Azan does make it to the US is he going to live in that tiny "smelly" motel room with Nicole pawing at him every second?  His life in Morocco is paradise in comparison.   He'd really go through some hell for that magic green card.   Hope it's worth it.

The guy that does Real Housewives is much more mischievous than Shaun and gets them all worked up into a lather at the reunions.

[WhatsUpDummy]

2 hours ago, sainte-chapelle said:

I am sad this is over, I only watch for this board and all the glorious snark. Onto 600lb life and 'so fabulous ' Whitney who I hate watch.

You and me both.  I watch Sister Wives too.  I can't resist these trainwreck shows and garbage people, they're like catnip to me even though they drive me crazy!  Although to be fair, 600lb Life isn't a complete hate-watch for me.  Some of them really turn their lives around and it's nice to see.  Then we have the others who make me scream at my tv :)

[Kickboxer]

15 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I would straight up tell Nicole:  "You can hear this from me or you can hear it from CPS.  Take your pick.  I don't care if you hate me, I care for your daughter."  She would pack her leftovers, get pissed, lick her fingers and leave.

As if she would have leftovers... :-p  Dammit, people got here first. This is what I get for not devoting all my time to the forum! 

Edited December 21, 2017 by Kickboxer
late to the party

[Adiba]

16 minutes ago, Suzywriter said:

Lol..if she traded the gas card, she could then choose which shoes to wear to walk.

 

My mother once offered me a trash bag of deposit bottles to trade for bus fare when I ran out of gas money. I declined and was all kinds of indignant at the "craziness" of my mother for making such an offer.  I walked that week and never forgot to make gas money a priority again.

It was a decade before I realized that mom wasn't mean or crazy. She was teaching me to be responsible, and it worked!

I do understand where you are coming from. I did feel sympathy for Nicole in the beginning, but her using May kinda put a damper on that. Having experience with this kind of behavior (too long a story) I can understand her family's frustration in dealing with Nicole. I look at Nicole as a "finagler" who will try to get her way no matter what, using guilt, manipulation, whatever means necessary. She also goes into donkey-like behavior and digs her heels in when challenged.

If I were in Robbalee's shoes, I would not throw Nicole "under the bus" on TV (to use a hackneyed expression). I would, however, caution her strongly and tell her my honest opinion about the situation. There is no need to embarrass or humiliate Nicole further on TV--her behavior already does enough.

[Forum member]

On 12/19/2017 at 7:40 PM, Arwen Evenstar said:

IIRC, Mr Jaws in Moonraker  was his most memorable role. 

Not Happy Gilmore's boss with a nail in his head?

Or a famous chef?

[poeticlicensed]

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

May is three now?  Have you thought about preschools, Nicole?  No?  What a shocker.

In FL, where she lives, preschool is free when a child reaches age 4. Hopefully she will have enough sense to take advantage. 

Another troubling thing about Nicole is her willingness to threaten to take May to live in Morocco. First off, I think those are empty threats, designed to get her way. May is a bargaining chip and Nicole knows all she needs to do is to deal the May card and  she gets what she wants. That said, of course she hasn't really thought about it, but would she really be willing to raise her daughter there. I had a student once whose dad worked in the oil industry so the family lived in the middle east. My student stayed with her parents until she was school aged, then they sent her back to the states to live with her grandparents and go to school, because educational opportunities for women are so limited there. Did Nicole ever think about the consequences to May of moving to an area where women are restricted from education? No? I didn't think so.  

[alegtostandon]

3 hours ago, sasha206 said:

Sorry!  Wasn't trying to equate your dad with David Pour!  I just was talking about her hurt as a result of the consequences of her dad's actions.  

I agree that Robbalee isn't tough enough on Nicole but I wouldn't equate being at the beach as not having a care in the world.  What is she to do when Nicole is chasing fuckboy?  Stay in the house and worry 24/7?  Sometimes when life is rough, you need a day at the beach to get through life itself.

Oh Sasha206...(please don't be offended...I named my Havanese puppy Sasha, I love the name!)...I knew you were not comparing my dad to Poor David Pour.  It was after I reread what I wrote made me feel as if I was comparing.  Sadly lost my dad last year...even tho my parents divorced, he was always the best dad ever to his 4 kids, regardless of the miles of distance. Didn't want to give a, bad impression of him.

Robalee needs to stop supporting Nicole. We have been in Robalee's place..it's hard to do.  After turning 21, I never asked either of my parents for a penny..there was one point where I was working 3 jobs.  For some reason, my step daughter thought we had a money tree in the back yard & had an endless supply of money to bail her out of her whims. There comes a point where you have to stop handing out & bailing out & allow them to suffer the consequences of their actions, otherwise they will never grow up. And, yes, Nicole thinks she has grown up because she gave birth, but she is extremely immature. And her parents give into her tantrums. 

[lovesnark]

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

And I get to work with kids whose parents can't say no either and it is a joy ride!!!  LOL!  

 

She has always struck me as a lower IQ gal but not developmentally delayed.  A person who is not college material but can go to a trade school (beauty school, be a vet tech, something like that) but not a powerhouse career.  But she will be unable to do that as she is lazy.  (I am not picking on hairstylists, I considered it heavily back in the day.  I still wish I had followed through!)  She can focus when it is about HER (her love of Azan's ab's seems to be motivating!) but other things, for the long term?  Nope, not interested.  May is three now?  Have you thought about preschools, Nicole?  No?  What a shocker.

You hit that nail square on it's head! She's capable of laser focus if it's something she wants and is completely about her.  When she turned 18, she figured out a way to finance a move to Texas  to go live with the online "love of her life". She figured out a way to finance a trip to Morocco and 5 weeks of free babysitting to go chase another online "love of her life". Yet, when she's asked to do something that would actually benefit her and the child she chose to bring into the world, such as trying to adopt a healthier lifestyle or looking for a way to have a better income so she doesn't have to borrow money and rely on her parents, it's toooooo haaaaarrrrrrd.

[Gigglepuff]

13 minutes ago, poeticlicensed said:

Another troubling thing about Nicole is her willingness to threaten to take May to live in Morocco. First off, I think those are empty threats, designed to get her way. May is a bargaining chip and Nicole knows all she needs to do is to deal the May card and  she gets what she wants. That said, of course she hasn't really thought about it, but would she really be willing to raise her daughter there. I had a student once whose dad worked in the oil industry so the family lived in the middle east. My student stayed with her parents until she was school aged, then they sent her back to the states to live with her grandparents and go to school, because educational opportunities for women are so limited there. Did Nicole ever think about the consequences to May of moving to an area where women are restricted from education? No? I didn't think so.  

See, this is where if Nicole were a normal, functioning adult that this wouldn't be an issue. There are plenty of American Schools and International Schools in the middle east and North Africa, including Morocco, (not sure if there is one in Adadir but there certainly are a few in Casablanca and Rabat) where the curriculum is based upon either American or European standards. I know someone teaching at one in the UAE, and the children that attend those schools are either North American or European or from wealthy local families. Tuition is high though, but so are the standards of education. From what the person I know in Dubai says, the classroom sizes are small, and most of the high school curriculum is IB based to prepare the students for university entrance. 

 

Since Nicole is an idiot, we all know that IF she did in fact take off and move to Morocco, (not going to happen anyway) she wouldn't bother seeking out a school for May. And who knows? May may not even meet the admission standards since most of those schools are private and can be pretty selective. Here's one based on the Cambridge International Standard. It looks like a great school....but again....Nicole. This is a situation where there would be no issue if we were talking about a normal, functioning adult, but of course we're not. I kind of doubt that Nicole will be all that involved in May's education no matter where in the world she is. It's sad. 

 

http://www.bisc.ma/curriculum/what-curriculum-do-we-teach/

[Mrs. Hanson]

18 minutes ago, lovesnark said:

You hit that nail square on it's head! She's capable of laser focus if it's something she wants and is completely about her.  When she turned 18, she figured out a way to finance a move to Texas  to go live with the online "love of her life". She figured out a way to finance a trip to Morocco and 5 weeks of free babysitting to go chase another online "love of her life".

Why thank you!  And let's give Jabba the Blond more credit:  organizing an overseas trip to Africa?  Not easy nor quick.  She did it as Azan's abs were waiting for her.  If she poured that energy into schooling - wow.  And (I am being snarky here) two loves of her life before age twenty!!!   She will be in Elizabeth Taylor numbers soon.

16 hours ago, alegtostandon said:

Now I need to say this in defense of my dad because I cannot stand the thought  of anyone thinking my dad was anything like Dough Boy David...my dad was an executive with a major pharmaceutical company. He left my mom after beginning an affair with a female executive at the same company. He married her a month after my parents 20 year marriage ended. At the wedding ceremony, the comment was made "how nice it is to see Don finally happy.".

Ouch - I can see why that hurt.  Just think if the word "finally" was omitted.  Glad he is happy, not finally happy.

[Ki-in]

Morocco will not take her as a permanent resident. She needs job skills and the ability to speak Arabic or French. She is working as a barista  and even if it were a high demand field there would be more than enough locals to fill the position. As usual her words are full of sound and fury signifying nothing.

Please Robbalee and co CALL HER BLUFF!!!!

[Quof]

Quote

As a safety freak that horrified me. She could hit it even by accident in her sleep. Plastic covers for outlets are widely & easily available, so there's no excuse for this.

Oh, hell, we all survived households without outlet covers.  It's not like she has a sharp object to stick in it.  You don't need a fork to eat French fries.

[biakbiak]

11 minutes ago, Ki-in said:

Morocco will not take her as a permanent resident. She needs job skills and the ability to speak Arabic or French. She is working as a barista  and even if it were a high demand field there would be more than enough locals to fill the position. As usual her words are full of sound and fury signifying nothing.

Please Robbalee and co CALL HER BLUFF!!!!

You just need to show you have sufficient funds which she most likely doesnt have but they are no language or job skill requirements to get the carte de sejour that allows you to live and work. The first one is goid for a year and then it can be renewed for longer after that.

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, Zazie said:

I have to ask. I'm italian and I live in Italy, so I know very little about american stuff. Shawn Robinson. Is she famous? Why? Really. Why? 

I confess I also only know of her from being the ineffectual host of these Tell All Shows, so I looked it up. She was on "Access Hollywood" (entertainment gossip show) on TV for many years. 

[Ki-in]

1 minute ago, biakbiak said:

You just need to show you have sufficient funds which she most likely doesnt have but they are no language or job skill requirements to get the carte de sejour that allows you to live and work. The first one is goid for a year and then it can be renewed for longer after that.

There are no requirements legally but seriously, she doesn't speak the language and has zero marketable skills. Yes, many Moroccans speak English but their English is going to be at a higher level (reading, writing and verbalizing) than hers.

Auntie Azan was fine because she knew she was going home but no one wants a lazy fat ass, dumb as fuck freeloader who sleeps until 3pm , with a woefully ignored child, living with them indefinitely.  If they aren't married Azan won't be having sex with her and if they get married he won't either so there's no point for this moronic, perpetually horny, desperate for attention from anyone blob with zero impulse control to ever go back there.

[biakbiak]

Just now, Ki-in said:

There are no requirements legally but seriously, she doesn't speak the language and has zero marketable skills. Yes, many Moroccans speak English but their English is going to be at a higher level (reading, writing and verbalizing) than hers.

I was merely pointing out that she could in fact become a legal resident of Morocco if she and Azan had sufficient funds. 

[sasha206]

2 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

I love SYTTD for the snark factor. I just sit there wondering how these women can be so silly and vapid. And does anyone know any words other than "wow factor" or "bling".

I can't even believe the thousands of dollars these brides are willing to spend (or have their parents spend) on wedding dresses!  When I was a bride, I went to a discount bridal store and tried on some expensive dresses.  The ones with "bling."  The strapless numbers that so many women seem to want.  I ended up finding the most simple dress in the back of the store, tried it on and loved the look of it.  Turns out it was a debutante dress, but it was so simple and elegant that it looked so much better on me than the mermaid outfits, the blinged out ones.  And it was so comfortable to dance in!  Not to mention, super cheap.  Spending ridiculous amounts of money on a dress for one night is asinine unless you are made of money.

11 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

I was merely pointing out that she could in fact become a legal resident of Morocco if she and Azan had sufficient funds. 

Wouldn't that be a hoot.  Azan hitches his stars to this overgrown toddler and ends up not only not making it to America, but having no escape from her in his own country.  

1 hour ago, alegtostandon said:

Oh Sasha206...(please don't be offended...I named my Havanese puppy Sasha, I love the name!)...I knew you were not comparing my dad to Poor David Pour.  It was after I reread what I wrote made me feel as if I was comparing.  Sadly lost my dad last year...even tho my parents divorced, he was always the best dad ever to his 4 kids, regardless of the miles of distance. Didn't want to give a, bad impression of him.

Robalee needs to stop supporting Nicole. We have been in Robalee's place..it's hard to do.  After turning 21, I never asked either of my parents for a penny..there was one point where I was working 3 jobs.  For some reason, my step daughter thought we had a money tree in the back yard & had an endless supply of money to bail her out of her whims. There comes a point where you have to stop handing out & bailing out & allow them to suffer the consequences of their actions, otherwise they will never grow up. And, yes, Nicole thinks she has grown up because she gave birth, but she is extremely immature. And her parents give into her tantrums. 

I figured you knew what I meant!  Just wanted to make sure I said that because who would ever want to be equated with David Poor even indirectly! :)  And Sasha is the name of my kitty, so we're in good company!  :)

[Ki-in]

Ugh, the strapless dresses that the brides are constantly pulling up to not spill out of...very distracting and unattractive.

 

I expected Aika to wear a dress exactly like the one she wore.

[Arwen Evenstar]

36 minutes ago, Ki-in said:

Auntie Azan was fine because she knew she was going home but no one wants a lazy fat ass, dumb as fuck freeloader who sleeps until 3pm , with a woefully ignored child, living with them indefinitely.  If they aren't married Azan won't be having sex with her and if they get married he won't either so there's no point for this moronic, perpetually horny, desperate for attention from anyone blob with zero impulse control to ever go back there.

THIS! So much THIS!

[Forum member]

2 hours ago, poeticlicensed said:

Did Nicole ever think about the consequences to May of moving to an area where women are restricted from education? No? I didn't think so.  

(Eye roll) "Like, education, you know, never like, you know, did like, anything for, you know, like me, so... "