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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


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Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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FWIW I am Mama and my husband is Baba. I had no choice because that is what my daughter was taught by her nanny. I don’t mind it at all. My husband prefers Baba, simply because it’s  a part of our daughter’s culture. I find Papa interesting because I have only heard Mami and Papi from my Central American friends and colleagues.

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2 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Boys, at least in my limited experience (two boy children and one girl) tend to take a bit longer. Our sons were both toilet trained shortly after they turned two, though still needed diapers or pull ups at night for about six  or seven months. And I don't know exactly what my husband said to our daughter, but he had a talk with her a couple of weeks before she turned two. We had just started toilet training, and she wasn't quite getting the idea, but she never needed a diaper or had a accident after that. I remember her pediatrician being very impressed when she came to her 2-year checkup in regular underwear, and noted on her chart, " T.T. already!". She always was a bit of a perfectionist, and always wanted to be able to do everything that her brother (22 months older) could do, so maybe that was part of her motivation.

According to the University of Michigan Medical school, "The physical maturity and readiness skills needed for successful toilet learning appear at the same time in girls and boys-between 18 and 30 months of age. The average age for girls to be toilet trained is 29 months, and for boys it's 31 months. Keep in mind that these are averages. Ninety-eight percent of kids are trained by 36 months of age."  The website also said that some kids may still wet the bed at night until age five.

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2 minutes ago, SMama said:

FWIW I am Mama and my husband is Baba. I had no choice because that is what my daughter was taught by her nanny. I don’t mind it at all. My husband prefers Baba, simply because it’s  a part of our daughter’s culture. I find Papa interesting because I have only heard Mami and Papi from my Central American friends and colleagues.

My mother is Baba to our kids. It's a bit of a mangling of the Polish Babcia, but just stuck after my older son first called her that (or just babbled it in her direction, I'm not even sure) and she's been Baba since then. I suppose the words for Mom & Dad all evolved from babies' babbles.

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My chill mother who was not fond of mommy wars always said no one ever enters kindergarten in diapers with a bottle. The culture of child rearing forever changes. My mom had me and my siblings potty trained early and off the bottle by 9 months. She had 4 kids in six years and used cloth diapers. My kids were potty trained around their 2nd birthday. Off bottles by a year. But one of my kids was still using a pacifier for bed in her third year.

Edited by GeeGolly
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1 hour ago, XrystalPond said:

In theory nothing. But it seems to be a hold over from their mangled Spanglish that they used in Central America. While I am all for speaking multiple languages, I find that the way Jill throws around a Spanish word here or there is more for show and to try to indicate her status or intelligence. I grew up with Russian speaking relatives and spoke it along with English from an early age. Most of the time my grandmother, great grandmother, and even mother would say something to me in English and then in Russian. They didn't just throw Russian words into English sentences. From an educational standpoint it can make for a mess of teaching sentence structure and conversational skills in any language if you do it the way the Dillards were doing. 

Maybe they just think it is cute. It just strikes me as strange because regionally Papa is usually used more as a term of endearment for a grandfather in that part of the south than for one's father. 

Yup...I grew up speaking Polish, though got to be much more comfortable with English by the time I was 10 or 11.  My parents always spoke Polish to me, and I always tended to answer in English.In conversation,  my mother will often lapse into English for half a sentence then revert back to Polish. When my dad was still alive he would always get annoyed at her if she lapsed into English. He was a bit of a tyrant when it came to keeping Polish alive in the family to the point that I pretty much rebelled and stopped speaking it altogether at some point. Which I regret, as it's a bit rusty now...but I never responded well to his blowing up and guilt-tripping me for infractions.

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2 hours ago, Absolom said:

Using only one or two coats of cheap polish without base or top coat definitely results in rapid chipping.  Maybe no one has ever explained to her that it's very much a 10 year old experimenting with polish look.

But if she actually used an inexpensive top coat and/or base coat, the cheap polish will last longer.  There are many drugstore options that actually work and won't set her back more than 10 bucks.  One of the topcoats I use is around $1.00.

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22 hours ago, cdp73 said:

He'll probably respond and tell you he uses KJB (King James Bible)

Does he know that King James was probably a big Queen ?

 

8 hours ago, Totally said:

My son was in nappies til 3 1/2 and then he still wasn’t dry until nearly 5

There was no lack of trying to get him dry on my part or his, he just wasn’t ready until he was ready 

It was incredibly stressful 

So no snark from me on Izzy still in nappies 

On reflection he was past 5 and still had an 3 accidents when he was 6 

Not good times ?

My niece was out of diapers during the day at 2 1/2 . Then her brother was born and she reverted to semi baby . No big deal  until her parents made it an issue about a year later . The result was this , she went to the toilet every 5 minutes for a few drops but still managed to pee threw all her underwear  because she couldn't pee on the toilet . This also included panicked crying spells .

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Perhaps Israel can’t stand to hear Jill say yay, and clap her hands, so he’s not in to potty training. I just hope when he doesn’t make it to the toilet, they aren’t mean about it.

Anyway.........

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12 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Perhaps Israel can’t stand to hear Jill say yay, and clap her hands, so he’s not in to potty training. I just hope when he doesn’t make it to the toilet, they aren’t mean about it.

Anyway.........

Yeesh Derick, the Tweeter is talking about a job you never had nor was fired from. Why not challenge this 'misinformation'?

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14 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Perhaps Israel can’t stand to hear Jill say yay, and clap her hands, so he’s not in to potty training. I just hope when he doesn’t make it to the toilet, they aren’t mean about it.

Anyway.........

Ha! I certainly wouldn’t want to be part of a “base” that boasts of watching television 24/7.

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4 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Yeesh Derick, the Tweeter is talking about a job you never had nor was fired from. Why not challenge this 'misinformation'?

"I have a job!" ....fin

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I don't get this use of the term base. That's way more political than it is television. Typically television and entertainement use the word demographic, or demo for short, to discuss the audience make-up. And they break that down into age group. Base is most often referred to political party supporters. So...don't know what he's getting at there. It sounds really off, though.

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19 hours ago, bigskygirl said:

Hmmm...I think Derick got a bad deal in the marriage game too. Jill acts like a teenage with her first crush and was so excited because a boy outside her family was actually giving her the time of day. Derick seemed to be okay until Jill got pregnant right away, clinging to him like there was no tomorrow, and the molestation scandal hit the fan. Yes, he is no great catch, but either is she.

Btw, maybe she does not have time to do a proper job with her nails because *gasp* she has to take care of her own children instead of expecting one or more of her sisters to babysit. Food for thought.

I can't snark on the nail polish. I have 2 relatively self sufficient kiddos and even I can not find time in the day to upkeep nails so I don't even try. I've never been a good 'girlie girl' so at least she tried. I give credit to that. 

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OH. That’s funny. TLC’s ‘base’ is those  of us that like to watch reality shows of any kind.  Truth is most of us think the acronym stands for Trashy Life Choices these days.  I really do miss when it stood for The Learning Channel. 

 I will admit the Duggars true ‘base’ is made up of many people that are offended that JB, Michelle, Josh, etc are not featured anymore.   Those are the same people that  protest when you or I don’t live our lives by their rules.  They don’t even like Jill now because she’s wearing pants. You can see that by going to Lily and Ellie’s blog.  

Edited by mythoughtis
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20 minutes ago, frenchtoast said:

I don't get this use of the term base. That's way more political than it is television. Typically television and entertainement use the word demographic, or demo for short, to discuss the audience make-up. And they break that down into age group. Base is most often referred to political party supporters. So...don't know what he's getting at there. It sounds really off, though.

I think the term he’s looking for is targeted demographic. 

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13 hours ago, queenanne said:

With all the churches and denominations that proliferate, there is absolutely no excuse to start your own church unless you have some odd doctrinaire goals that "aren't being met" by, you know, a real quantified denomination with decades of history behind it.  

Or unless you're a major control freak who wants to be the absolute boss of your own little flock instead of having to listen to the ideas of a bunch of pastors and deacons who obviously don't have a direct pipeline to God like you do.

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29 minutes ago, charmed1 said:

Ha! I certainly wouldn’t want to be part of a “base” that boasts of watching television 24/7.

Oh yes, TLC execs sit around thinking of ways to bait the Duggars. 

Derick et al are giving themselves way too much importance. Color me surprised.

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"baiting the Duggars"! I wonder if anyone who has a TLC show feels "baited" that TLC put them on the air after Joshgate I or kept them on the air after they wrote a book admitting they were inspired by the Pearls' parenting techniques, or back on the air after Joshgates became public, etc.  Why hasn't Sex Sent Me to ER "baited the Duggars"? Or "Breaking Amish" which theoretically was about conservative religious kids "escaping" their upbringing?  Or Say Yes to the Dress, with the most defrauding wedding dresses EVER? (To be fair if  you want to wear a sexy wedding dress, that's your choice and I'm not judging.) I haven't watched the network much lately. I'm sure there are other and better examples. 

Since the person used to watch TLC 24/7, they watched Say Yes to the Dress? Sex Sent Me to ER?  Nude Real Estate? Strange Sex?  

I haven't heard of the any Duggars "took the bait".  

I stopped watching TLC and the Duggars. I'm back for Jazz, but not the Duggars' show. 

Edited by Temperance
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Pretty sure TLC firing that subhuman POS was "figuring some things out about their base."

Just curious, has anyone ever asked Derick's Twatter why he thinks it's so funny to try to injure or even kill cats? Are cats like gays?

Edited by Aja
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8 hours ago, Zella said:

I've met a few people who attended a home church, and I think this is true. I am sure there are exceptions like there is for everything, but for me, it's become a red flag. Even if they don't have any noticeably weird doctrine, it seems to indicate they can't get along with anybody, are control freaks, or have extremely rigid views that nobody can meet, which is why they set up shop at home. (I'm not counting things like the Amish, who from what I understand rotate between members' houses for services.)

I mentioned on here a few days ago that I went to a pretty conservative Christian college. There were a lot of fundamentalists there, but home churches still had a bad rap. One of my friends had a childhood that reminded me a bit of the Duggars--minus the tons of siblings. She was still pretty religious and still is, as far as I know, but she told me after her experience with home churches as a teenager that she practically runs from anyone who does that. 

Edited to add: I knew another family that also did a home church. They were very Duggar-like, including being a big family that homeschooled. When I first met them, they seemed really nice, but after I got to know them, they were unhinged. I felt so sorry for the kids (I was friends with the oldest sisters). I always think about them when I think about the Duggars. I lost contact with them, but from what I understand, every single one of them finally rebelled, even if they waited until about the age of 30. Not sure if any of the Duggars would actually revolt against Jim Bob like they did. 

Yeah, in my experience it usually trends to the super weird and/or borderline cultish behaviors, like "because Christ wasn't 'really' born in current December 25, we're not going to celebrate Christmas at all" type of situation, which I don't really understand.  We can't just pick a day as a ceremonial marker?  You can't just have your church punt it to February or whenever it's believed to actually be?  Nope, we're going to shun the holiday year-round.  Etc.  

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15 hours ago, Mollie said:

You can see in that video that Israel is still wearing diapers.  He'll turn three-years-old in two months.  What's up with that?

I thought sure my son would go to kindergarten with pullups in his backpack. He just couldn't be bothered with toilet training. "I am busy" was a favorite excuse. He mastered tinkling but not BM's. He had BMaccident at preschool & teacher asked him "What Happened?" She was expecting an "i dunno" or a blank face but instead got "oh, let me think about it." Teacher was  great & suggested he stay out of preschool til fully trained, which we did. Took about a month. I still remember crying to her  on phone  for help- she gave me all kinds of suggestions, which worked. (Thank you again Miss Brenda.)

It would be interesting to find out what ages the sister mom's had the kids potty trained. 

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J'chelle was on some show once explaining her theory of potty training. It was all about "obedience." God lets the child know when s/he has to go and the child must put down his toys and obey God's command to go to the potty. It was all very odd -- and I think that even the interviewer was kind of taken aback. I'm sure that Jill is using the same Pearl-based, obey God approach on Israel.

Here's a link to the same spiel in one of their books:

https://books.google.com/books?id=GWSeYWSIBdQC&pg=PA136&lpg=PA136&dq=michelle+duggar+on+potty+training&source=bl&ots=z_NvqQxOkW&sig=hn6W0lhQH6YAgBg3qYgTf-B2O4Y&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwia4dTjh5XZAhVl34MKHctuAr0Q6AEINzAC#v=onepage&q=michelle duggar on potty training&f=false

Edited by cmr2014
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Aww, TLC can still be considered The Learning Channel.  Just from one episode with the Duggers, people can learn what a disaster this family is, ways to get around a molestation scandal (not to mention the law), and how much of an asshole Dwerp truly is.  Bonus points for learning the word 'PER-PEN-DICK-U-LAR' and what bankruptcy is.

Edited by sixlets
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10 hours ago, Heathen said:

What's wrong with that? 

I think it's just them trying to show off that they lived in Danger America and how "culturally aware" they are.  Jill uses a Spanish word here and there which is a joke because they could barely speak Spanish when they were down there. 

Plenty of us grew up in real bilingual families and use non-English words for many things.  This is different...this is Jill trying to be cool.  

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9 hours ago, Absolom said:

Using only one or two coats of cheap polish without base or top coat definitely results in rapid chipping.  Maybe no one has ever explained to her that it's very much a 10 year old experimenting with polish look.

I hate nail polish, I swear I can feel it if it is colored. Freaks me out. Clear is ok, as is hardener. Toes? Yes please. 

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I thought I read ( in here maybe) that Pistol Pete attended wedding receptions and danced with guests? 

It’s JB and Michelle who think dancing is evil. Jill has decided to wear pants, a henna tattoo, and a nose ring even though  her parents don’t believe the same.  We can’t assume that Derick believes what JB believes.  We shouldn’t, however, be surprised when he tries to tread lightly about what matters to his in-laws.  If your in laws followed you on social media. You might do the same. 

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17 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

But if she actually used an inexpensive top coat and/or base coat, the cheap polish will last longer.  There are many drugstore options that actually work and won't set her back more than 10 bucks.  One of the topcoats I use is around $1.00.

I have a feeling the Duggars know as much about the actual technique of using nail polish successfully as they do about keeping long hair healthy and looking good or about browning ground beef before you put it in a potato casserole.   i.e., nothing. 

As far as I can tell, the family culture has pretty much discouraged finding out how to do anything right. "We know how to do things minimally" seems to be their motto. 

Jana and JD may have decided to be exceptions to this tradition, to prevent planes from crashing and the house from falling down. 

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What he really means is that diversity is good if it's all different versions of the same thing. His version of diversity is just derivatives of white, upper middle class, religious (but it has to be the "right" kind of religious).

News flash ... that's exactly what diversity isn't.

That said, I can't stand 90 Day Fiancee.

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2 hours ago, mythoughtis said:

 We shouldn’t, however, be surprised when he tries to tread lightly about what matters to his in-laws.  If your in laws followed you on social media. You might do the same. 

I guess that I could understand that, but he could do it without being a dickhead. Clearly, I expect too much.

Edited by Arwen Evenstar
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13 hours ago, mynextmistake said:

When I was a little girl, my grandfather said something that has stuck with me for my entire life. He said that at the end of every day, the world could be either a better or a worse place because of the things that I did that day, and that the choice was mine to make. 

I chose better. I’m not sure that could be said by any of the adult Duggars. 

But the Duggars chose Jesus.  No need for any personal responsibility, Jesus will take care of everything.  The world is a bad place because others have not chosen the correct Jesus.

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20 minutes ago, SMama said:

Who the fuck elevated ignorant Picasso Face to Chairman of Diversity? I should post after I calm down and take SGirl to school but in the meantime, FUCK YOU DERICK! When you are denied housing because you are brown you get to talk. When you are stopped driving a luxury car with a vanity plate under the pretense it was reported stolen, just because you are brown you get to talk about diversity. When your US citizen child, with a citizenship CERTIFICATE is denied a Social Security Number/Card because “I’ve heard most Chinese adoptions are not real” you get to opine. When your thirteen year old brown child gets car sick and needs Dramamine for a long car ride but is six feet tall and 170 lbs gets a gun pulled on him on a checkpoint, JUST BECAUSE OF HIS BROWN SKIN AND SIZE, you get to talk about diversity. When on the first day of school, you are brown and waiting at the office and are passed over for your husband who is WHITE, you get to talk. FUCK YOU TO HELL AKD BACK DERICK. FUCK YOU! Your fucking mangled face, Wonder Bread, Z Reality TV Star, arranged marriage, Darwinism should have wiped your asshole genes off this earth self DOESN'T get to define diversity. Smug ass, good for nothing, waste of skin asshole.

I apologize for every infraction on the English language on my post. He just piseed me off. Off to take my beautiful, brown skinned little girl to school. FUCK YOU DERICK.

You tell him, Mama. <3

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17 hours ago, cmr2014 said:

J'chelle was on some show once explaining her theory of potty training. It was all about "obedience." God lets the child know when s/he has to go and the child must put down his toys and obey God's command to go to the potty. It was all very odd -- and I think that even the interviewer was kind of taken aback. I'm sure that Jill is using the same Pearl-based, obey God approach on Israel.

Here's a link to the same spiel in one of their books:

https://books.google.com/books?id=GWSeYWSIBdQC&pg=PA136&lpg=PA136&dq=michelle+duggar+on+potty+training&source=bl&ots=z_NvqQxOkW&sig=hn6W0lhQH6YAgBg3qYgTf-B2O4Y&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwia4dTjh5XZAhVl34MKHctuAr0Q6AEINzAC#v=onepage&q=michelle duggar on potty training&f=false

What in the name of all that's Holy is that shit???? 

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