Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[JoanArc]

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2.  It's great that he was able to get an undergrad degree without student loans, but no way he is not taking some out for law school.  I know we have discussed this before, but with Jill not working he has to be taking out a massive amount of loans for the family to survive.

Don't forget Dillard Family Ministries. Who knows how much of those donations went to Law School. Also, tack on medical debt from Jill's botched births.

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falling in love and marrying my best friend when neither of us knew whether my mom would be alive when we arrived back from our honeymoon;

I don’t even know how to explain the way this makes me feel about the two of them.

They coulda...um, put off the wedding a few months. *gasp*

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Lordy, I guess turning 30 has made him a philosopher. I turn 30 later this year. Maybe I'll subject you all to my wisdom in a lengthy humble-brag blog post to celebrate. 

My 40th birthday loosened me up, a whole hell of a lot. I'd still never post Derick's tripe.

[Christina87]

8 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

I think most people wait longer than just a couple months to marry, giving them more time to know the person. And many also live together before marriage, so there aren’t as many big surprises.

This is how I feel too! I do agree with Derick that some people are WAY too picky. One of my most recent dates was with a guy who complimented my appearance at length, and we had a blast together. Of course, I didn't think I was going to marry the guy, but I was sure there would be a second date. Surprise...there wasn't! I was left wondering why the guy didn't even like me enough to go to dinner with me one more time, as I'll basically give everyone a chance who I'm reasonably attracted to, and is nice / not weird. That's all they have to do. I understand a lot of people are nervous, and act more natural on a second date. However, we've all had those one date wonders, and questioning why their standards are so high, and how we fell so short that they never want to see us again, is hard on the ego. But there's a point where you realize that some people are great catches and alone in their late 30's BECAUSE they won't give anyone a chance. I think Derick would agree with this. 

The way he worded it makes it sound like he wants people to settle, though, and like he's rewlized he's settled with Jill. Like @Scarlett45 said, there's nothing in there that gives the impression that his life is better with Jill in it, or that he appreciates having her as his wife. I think there are ways to say what he did without clearly casting shade on Jill. It makes me sad, because as loathsome as she can be, she's kindhearted, and deserves someone who thinks the sun rises and sets with her. 

And how do you find someone like that? YOU DATE BEFORE MARRIAGE!!!! Obviously someone who has been courting three months might be infatuated, and want to marry their spouse because she's pretty, seems like she'll be a good housekeeper, says she wants the same things as you, etc. Someoje who's dated their partner two years might say that she's good in a crisis, or she's consistently a hard worker, or has integrity, or has kept the house spotless constantly while also holding down a full-time job. The person who has dated longer has a better chance of being with "the one" because they can give deeper reasons for their love, and they're not likely to be swayed to change their mind. It makes me feel bad for Jill, because she had surface level love, and now it's obvious that Derick doesn't think much of her as a person or wife. 

[Scarlett45]

7 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

However, we've all had those one date wonders, and questioning why their standards are so high, and how we fell so short that they never want to see us again, is hard on the ego. But there's a point where you realize that some people are great catches and alone in their late 30's BECAUSE they won't give anyone a chance. I think Derick would agree with this. 

I think many people like this really DO NOT want to be partnered but feel socially pressured to “keep looking” because that’s what people do. I wish just not getting married/being partnered was presented as a legit option for people rather than something that just happens to you. This may be of special importance in the evangelical Christian space because if you aren’t married NO partnered sex and NO peer relationships. 

[Trillium]

Negative Millennial Stereotypes that fit DDD:

- Over inflated sense of self importance 

- Job hopper

- Unwilling to work hard

- Still dependent on partent(s)

I’m sure there’s more. 

- Signed technically a Millenial, but in their late 30’s. 

[yogi2014L]

4 hours ago, ginger90 said:

I don’t even know how to explain the way this makes me feel about the two of them.

Probably one of the most selfish thing I've read from this family and that is saying something. Hope the sex was worth it, FFS.

[yogi2014L]

12 minutes ago, Trillium said:

Negative Millennial Stereotypes that fit DDD:

- Over inflated sense of self importance 

- Job hopper

- Unwilling to work hard

- Still dependent on partent(s)

I’m sure there’s more. 

- Signed technically a Millenial, but in their late 30’s. 

I'll add

Addicted to Social Media, lazy, entitled

- Signed also a 30 something Millenial 

[doodlebug]

11 hours ago, sigmaforce86 said:

I looked at the picture before I read the title or recipe and I swear I thought it was bannana pudding with 'nilla wafers on top.    This is NOT an appetizing dinner - and for someone trying to be a blogger or influencer or whatever on-line attention she's seeking.......does she not realize or has nobody told her that we eat first with our eyes so maybe beige food on a white plate on a brown table is a more than a little monotone and pretty gross looking to boot.

Does anyone believe this?  Does JILL believe this or is she willfully lying?  We decided as opposed to TLC kicked us off is really stretching things.  On the other hand months after they were let go her "headship" was still insisting they weren't fired and at one point went as far as to say in an interview that it was not only fully their decision to leave but that TLC actually wanted them to stay on.  The only consistent thing that Jill is parroting is the "headed in a different direction" defense which is what Derrick also said multiple times so I guess that's the party line they trot out for their followers.

I think it is quite possible that Derick, being an ignorant jackass, gave them an ultimatum: pay our hospital bills for Israel or we won't let you film Sam's delivery.  And/or the legal team at TLC told them they wouldn't film Sam's birth unless she labored and delivered in a hospital due to the risks based on her history and Derick tried to strongarm them into paying their old and any new hospital bills.  Or told them they wouldn't do it.  Then again, perhaps TLC approached Derick in the wake of his first anti-Jazz tirade which happened around that time and informed him of the clause in his contract preventing him from publicly criticizing TLC or any of its shows and Derick, being so legally oriented whined about his First Amendment rights and refused.

In other words, I think TLC made some requests/demands of them; Derick made his own demands; and TLC walked away.  I could see Derick spinning that into the end of their relationship with TLC being his idea.

[Christina87]

2 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I think many people like this really DO NOT want to be partnered but feel socially pressured to “keep looking” because that’s what people do. I wish just not getting married/being partnered was presented as a legit option for people rather than something that just happens to you. This may be of special importance in the evangelical Christian space because if you aren’t married NO partnered sex and NO peer relationships. 

You are SO right!!! It would make it easier for everyone, because these people either wouldn't be on the dating scene, or they would feel comfortable admitting that they just wanted to keep it casual. I admire that you are upfront with guys about not wanting a relationship, @Scarlett45. Social norms really do need to change in this area. 

[bythelake]

3 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yes! Derrick didn’t say what a good wife he has in Jill or how she’s enriched his life even though marriage is hard, he said to young Christians reading his post “settle on the first person that comes along who is Christian or you’ll die alone.”  

And he makes just a cursory reference to his two beautiful boys, he doesn’t even mention them by name.

[mynextmistake]

10 hours ago, Pingaponga said:

Why does she want me to boil the cooked chicken? What did chicken ever do to her?

I bet Becky in the third row never has to double cook her chicken. 

[lulu69]

11 hours ago, Trillium said:

Negative Millennial Stereotypes that fit DDD:

- Over inflated sense of self importance 

- Job hopper

- Unwilling to work hard

- Still dependent on partent(s)

I’m sure there’s more. 

- Signed technically a Millenial, but in their late 30’s. 

11 hours ago, yogi2014L said:

I'll add

Addicted to Social Media, lazy, entitled

- Signed also a 30 something Millenial 

Don't forget : Have a massive hissy fit and go to pieces when someone doesn't agree with your point of view.

Based on the above criteria, I'd say Dreck is the stereotypical millennial 

[BetyBee]

17 hours ago, ginger90 said:

changing a diaper;

It was actually Derick who said the above - how many think he changed just the one diaper?  

 

[jukie]

Ugh where do I start.......

Try as I might to not to feel sorry for Jill reading that diatribe from Derrick I can't, I want to give that poor woman a hug and I now need a shower, a stiff drink and some form of mind altering drug.

'The one' is not a description of a perfect human being, it is a description of 'the one' that makes your heart skip the light fantastic at the mere thought of them, it makes your belly feel like a kaleidoscope of butterflies are fluttering in the pit of your stomach, it makes you see passed all their foibles and imperfections and love that person even more because of them.  'The one' doesn't make life and the world perfect, but 'the one' helps you get through the daily battle and sits with you at the end of the day and says 'we made it through another day'.

Do people settle, yes, is everyone lucky enough to meet 'the one' no, does that mean that the person you are with is any less of a person because they are not 'the one' no.  However what makes you an extra special Ahole is when you feel the need to publicly announce to the world, that the person who has committed to you in front of thousands of people and your God, provided you with public platform, children and finances to allow you to not hold a decent job for years, is not 'the one'.......I am heartbroken for Jill and beyond repulsed with Derrrrrrick.

[lucy711]

I think Jill would be devastated by what Derrick wrote.  But if I were married to Derrick (heaven forbid!) I wouldn't be.  That's because I agree with him in a way.  I don't believe in the idea of "soulmates" and I think everyone settles to an extent.  I'm writing this as a happily married woman.  I dated my husband for five years, and we've been married for ten.  I am content in my marriage and don't want to be with anyone else.  But I think it would be a lie to say that I couldn't be equally happy with another man.  If he didn't attend the same college as I did and we never met, I believe I would have found someone else and most likely been married happily.  Overall my husband is a great guy, but he has some flaws that I "settled for" and ditto for me.  Call it unromantic (it is) but it is true and I don't think either of us has a problem being realistic about it.

The reason I don't believe in the idea of "the one" is that I have seen too many people in my family be widowed and find happiness in a second marriage.  My parents were married for 25 years.  They had a great marriage.  My mom died and my dad remarried.  He has another great marriage.  I suppose what I'm saying is that I find Derrick to be realistic and since I'm a grown woman I don't need my husband to pretend that I'm the moon and the stars.  I do feel bad for Jill because I think she would like that, but I know that I'm loved and appreciated. I don't need any cliched statements about romance to make me feel valued.

Edited March 21, 2019 by lucy711

[Oldernowiser]

2 hours ago, lucy711 said:

 I don't need any cliched statements about romance to make me feel valued.

But you actually are valued and words seem to be all Jill gets. 

Derrick doesn’t seem to give a rusty damn about anyone except in what benefit they provide to him. The idea of loving someone because of who they are doesn’t  seem to break through his colorful candy coating of total self-absorption.

Deeds, not words. They both throw around hashtags about how bestevah their spouse is, but has Derrick ever posted anything about Jill as a human being? Cooking him meals, raising his children, kissing his ego...yes. But how about I love it when she laughs? Or I love that she believes in me despite all evidence to the contrary?

This latest essay of “how great am I” fails to even provide Jill with the usual lip service.

 I feel bad for her, too.

[Ijustwantsomechips]

16 hours ago, yogi2014L said:

I'll add

Addicted to Social Media, lazy, entitled

- Signed also a 30 something Millenial 

And I’ll add:

-An insufferable know it all wjth answers to all the world’s problems

-Signed, a late 30s millennial raised as a Gen Xer

[toodles]

3 hours ago, lucy711 said:

I think Jill would be devastated by what Derrick wrote.  But if I were married to Derrick (heaven forbid!) I wouldn't be.  That's because I agree with him in a way.  I don't believe in the idea of "soulmates" and I think everyone settles to an extent.  I'm writing this as a happily married woman.  I dated my husband for five years, and we've been married for ten.  I am content in my marriage and don't want to be with anyone else.  But I think it would be a lie to say that I couldn't be equally happy with another man.  If he didn't attend the same college as I did and we never met, I believe I would have found someone else and most likely been married happily.  Overall my husband is a great guy, but he has some flaws that I "settled for" and ditto for me.  Call it unromantic (it is) but it is true and I don't think either of us has a problem being realistic about it.

The reason I don't believe in the idea of "the one" is that I have seen too many people in my family be widowed and find happiness in a second marriage.  My parents were married for 25 years.  They had a great marriage.  My mom died and my dad remarried.  He has another great marriage.  I suppose what I'm saying is that I find Derrick to be realistic and since I'm a grown woman I don't need my husband to pretend that I'm the moon and the stars.  I do feel bad for Jill because I think she would like that, but I know that I'm loved and appreciated. I don't need any cliched statements about romance to make me feel valued.

I like your post a thousand times.  I feel this way too.

[Oldernowiser]

Okay, so today I turned 61, so I thought I would write a couple of thousand words about how I am wonderful and brave and godly and an inspiration to so many.

Just kidding.

[Natalie68]

15 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Okay, so today I turned 61, so I thought I would write a couple of thousand words about how I am wonderful and brave and godly and an inspiration to so many.

Just kidding.

Happy birthday!!!

[Suzn]

26 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Okay, so today I turned 61, so I thought I would write a couple of thousand words about how I am wonderful and brave and godly and an inspiration to so many.

Just kidding.

You should write it - I am absolutely positive it would be more interesting than Derelict's offering. 😊

[tabloidlover]

Jill needs to dump Citrus and Lemon stat... from her IG story this morning, please note the horrible sandals and the shirt looks like a shirt my mom wore in the late 70’s

[JoanArc]

46 minutes ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

And I’ll add:

-An insufferable know it all wjth answers to all the world’s problems

-Signed, a late 30s millennial raised as a Gen Xer

Don’t forget: Has never owned their own home.

edit: Code “NOTHANKSJILL” saves you 100% at Citrus and Lemon.

Edited March 21, 2019 by JoanArc

[BitterApple]

1 minute ago, tabloidlover said:

Jill needs to dump Citrus and Lemon stat... from her IG story this morning, please note the horrible sandals and the shirt looks like a shirt my mom wore in the late 70’s

Jill just can't seem to get it right. On the plus side, her hair is neatly braided and the clothes fit well. However, she can't stage a picture to save her life. The boys are distracting and she's squinting, which makes her expression look pinched and annoyed. Ffs, all she has to do is Google some famous influencers and copy what they do. It's not that hard.

[ginger90]

[PradaKitty]

That picture of Jill looks as though it was taken in 1975 with the ugly shirt and platform shoes. It also looks as though they live in Section 8 housing...

I was thinking earlier today that Jill’s life has become sooooo drab. She lives in a small, dark and dingy apartment, cooks drab, bland, beige food and just looks basically like Hell most of the time. Her life needs COLOR in all aspects. Can they paint the walls in their dingy home?  Can she incorporate color into her cream of puke meals? Can she look through some fashion magazines and see how clothes are supposed to fit? 

Guess not. 

[allonsyalice]

wait did she just discover platform shoes? why did she describe what it is?

[wilsie]

1 hour ago, Oldernowiser said:

Okay, so today I turned 61, so I thought I would write a couple of thousand words about how I am wonderful and brave and godly and an inspiration to so many.

Just kidding.

Happy Birthday!

[ginger90]

Happy birthday, @Oldernowiser !! 🎉 

[Ohiopirate02]

22 minutes ago, not you again said:

I wonder what Jana thinks of Dreck's epistle.  I believe the story has been God hasn't put "the right one" in her path, correct?  According to Dreck she simply needs to marry the next single man she sees and everything will be fine, because Jesus.

I was wondering the same thing.  One thing about being Catholic, being single is just as valid of a calling as marriage or religious life.  Because the fact is, there are not an equal number of men and women in the world for all of us to pair up.  Some of us are not going to meet a Mr./Ms. Right Now let alone a Mr/Ms. Right.  Dreck really does insult Jana with the idea that her life is incomplete because she is single.

[Barb23]

Does Derelict realize some people don't want to marry?

I wondered what Jana thought too. 

[Suzn]

Why oh why are they posed looking into the sun????  OMG the deep squint is just horrible.  Can't Jill even see what unattractive pictures those are?

[BradandJanet]

At least she found a shirt with some mustard stripes to match the famous mustard cardigan. 

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I was wondering the same thing.  One thing about being Catholic, being single is just as valid of a calling as marriage or religious life.  Because the fact is, there are not an equal number of men and women in the world for all of us to pair up.  Some of us are not going to meet a Mr./Ms. Right Now let alone a Mr/Ms. Right.  Dreck really does insult Jana with the idea that her life is incomplete because she is single.

And some men want men and some women want women. Or many other combinations!

[Ohiopirate02]

20 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

And some men want men and some women want women. Or many other combinations!

There is also that.  I was trying to appeal to Dreck's narrow mindset where being gay is a choice and not an innate part of who you are and show how messed up his whole screed truly is.  

[GeeGolly]

3 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Okay, so today I turned 61, so I thought I would write a couple of thousand words about how I am wonderful and brave and godly and an inspiration to so many.

Just kidding.

Happy Birthday to our good friend @Oldernowiser. She is a blessing and an example to us all. She contributes thoughtful and Godly posts and is a true example of a Proverbs 31 Woman. We can't wait to see what God has in store for you! 🙏🍰😉

[Oldernowiser]

21 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Happy Birthday to our good friend @Oldernowiser. She is a blessing and an example to us all. She contributes thoughtful and Godly posts and is a true example of a Proverbs 31 Woman. We can't wait to see what God has in store for you! 🙏🍰😉

🤣🤣🤣

Best part of my whole birthday except it made me spit water all over my iPad..

Thank you!!!!

[mythoughtis]

8 hours ago, lucy711 said:

I think Jill would be devastated by what Derrick wrote.  But if I were married to Derrick (heaven forbid!) I wouldn't be.  That's because I agree with him in a way.  I don't believe in the idea of "soulmates" and I think everyone settles to an extent.  I'm writing this as a happily married woman.  I dated my husband for five years, and we've been married for ten.  I am content in my marriage and don't want to be with anyone else.  But I think it would be a lie to say that I couldn't be equally happy with another man.  If he didn't attend the same college as I did and we never met, I believe I would have found someone else and most likely been married happily.  Overall my husband is a great guy, but he has some flaws that I "settled for" and ditto for me.  Call it unromantic (it is) but it is true and I don't think either of us has a problem being realistic about it.

The reason I don't believe in the idea of "the one" is that I have seen too many people in my family be widowed and find happiness in a second marriage.  My parents were married for 25 years.  They had a great marriage.  My mom died and my dad remarried.  He has another great marriage.  I suppose what I'm saying is that I find Derrick to be realistic and since I'm a grown woman I don't need my husband to pretend that I'm the moon and the stars.  I do feel bad for Jill because I think she would like that, but I know that I'm loved and appreciated. I don't need any cliched statements about romance to make me feel valued.

Yes. Absolutely.  Derrick could have said this and everyone would have understood his point.  Or he could have discussed their courting concept - because that’s not about romance, it’s about finding someone who fits into your life and your familys’ life.  

But instead  he throws up word salad that ends up insulting Jill unnecessarily and doesn’t even get his point across. 

[Jynnan tonnix]

Hey, Happy Birthday, @Oldernowiser!! Hope it's been a great day!

[Oldernowiser]

2 hours ago, BradandJanet said:

At least she found a shirt with some mustard stripes to match the famous mustard cardigan. 

As I am excusing myself from all respectable behavior today, I will point out that that awful shirt:

1) hits her in the broadest part of her hips and makes them look huge;

2) somehow makes her shoulders look weirdly narrow;

3) has those old-lady sleeves that cover up the batwings but are otherwise completely unflattering (and note that I am an old lady and wouldn’t wear this on a drunken bet).

Ahhh. I feel better.

[BigBingerBro]

If I were Citrus and Potpourri (or whatever it is) I'd be majorly pissed off over those photos.  Dear Lord, couldn't they find a shady place to stand???    And what is that saying about wearing horizontal stripes??????

[jcbrown]

1 hour ago, BigBingerBro said:

If I were Citrus and Potpourri (or whatever it is) I'd be majorly pissed off over those photos.  Dear Lord, couldn't they find a shady place to stand???    And what is that saying about wearing horizontal stripes??????

Dreck looks like a serial killer in the pic he is in with her. Squinting, and the shadows around his eyes have shadows. Incompetent as usual, Jilly Muffin. I almost feel sorry for her.

[Zella]

Happy birthday, @Oldernowiser! 😄 

[awaken]

Derick looks like a demonic ghoul in this picture!  Scary!!

i can’t believe they’re squinting that hard in every photo!  

[awaken]

On 3/20/2019 at 2:30 PM, ginger90 said:

If you aren’t married, don’t wait for a perfect person because you’ll just die single.

I’m confused by what he’s saying here. That single people should just go ahead and marry so they don’t die alone?! What happened to waiting patiently for the one god has in store for you?

[JoanArc]

7 minutes ago, awaken said:

I’m confused by what he’s saying here. That single people should just go ahead and marry so they don’t die alone?! What happened to waiting patiently for the one god has in store for you?

No masturbating while you’re waiting, is what!

[Portia]

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Happy Birthday to our good friend @Oldernowiser. She is a blessing and an example to us all. She contributes thoughtful and Godly posts and is a true example of a Proverbs 31 Woman. We can't wait to see what God has in store for you! 🙏🍰😉

.No mention of @OLDERNOWISER 's Servant's Heart? 

[latetotheparty]

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Happy Birthday to our good friend @Oldernowiser. She is a blessing and an example to us all. She contributes thoughtful and Godly posts and is a true example of a Proverbs 31 Woman. We can't wait to see what God has in store for you! 🙏🍰😉

You mean our sweet friend. 

[Temperance]

If you google  Duggar birthday message generator, this exists. 

[Sew Sumi]

I've seen some of the generated messages. Hilariously fundiesque.

[3 is enough]

Happy Birthday Oldernowiser! I hope you had a fantastic day! 🙂