S08.E14: The Benefits Of Friendship

[Tara Ariano]

Quote

Bethenny glams it up for a Skinnygirl event, despite her health issues. Also, Ramona and Sonja take a dance lesson; Jules sees her plastic surgeon; and the women gather for drinks, with LuAnn confronting Ramona and Sonja delivering shocking news.

[ZaldamoWilder]

B's makeup artist had no idea who Janice Dickinson is.   <<giggle>>

Hey Andy? Your next poll should be:  whose hw cooter haven't we seen yet?   Vote now.

Beth to Julia (about Ramona) "put the padlock on the closet so she can't take any dresses"  bwahaaaaaaaa!

Oy Carole.  Genug already.  I'm growing older by the minute listening to how Lu should've approached you.   G'awn guh.

Did Jules say yeah but then there are other holes or other hoes?  wait! dontanswerthat!

Ramona as the proper lady is killing me.  Dressed in pearls and shit.   Heffer you stick your hands in people's cake.    That hair?  Nope.

LOL ya'll Luann was ready to put the real in real housewives  #cutabitch  #hereforit 

For some reason my favorite part was when they were all sitting around the living room talking mess and laughing.

[bosawks]

Well, the meatballs looked good....

[BloggerAloud]

Dorinda's impression of Ramona is a pleasure, joy and a gift to the world during these dark times.

[SCS]

Jules in the stirrups and her MD -- just no. 

eta: also, what BloggerAloud said up thar ^^ -- Dor as Ra was a thing of beauty. 

Edited July 7, 2016 by steelcitysister
BloggerAloud spoke WISDOM!!!!

[Straycat80]

Can Jules get a different storyline already? So tired of hearing about her wounded vagina! 

Anyone else notice how hoarse Lu's voice was when she met up with Dorinda and then in a few minutes her voice was normal? 

Why did Bethenny have to get all made up like a 14 year old pop singer to schlepp her new candy? She looked stupid.

Not a fan of Luann's but she's right, I think these 'bitches' are being horrible to her , especially Sawn-ya who is suppose to be her friend. Keep the fact that you whored around with Tom to yourself, don't rub it in Lu's face. Are some of these women jealous that Lu found a man she (thinks) she'll be happy with? 

[BlackMamba]

All I really have to say is LuAnn

They been coming for you all season and you keep shutting they petty,  single asses down.   I appreciate you are not editing yourself for queen Bethenny and princess Carole.  Sonja,  had no business trying to be messy because she's going to miss Tom's pickle strokes.   Ramona,  of course,  is hardly ever happy so don't expect a lot of her here.   Just keep doing you.   And if they not going to be happy for you,  they don't have to come to your nuptials.   The less bitter bitches there,  the better the wedding. 

[KFC]

I find Dorinda's constant flip-flopping to be the biggest crime of the HWs this season. Especially when she tries to frame her actions as that of a peacemaker when she's really anything but.

[parisprincess]

Good lord, how many more episodes are we going to be held hostage by Bethenny and her fibroids? 

Did I hear Bethenny refer to Luann as self absorbed?  I just can't with people who are so self-unaware. For crying out loud, Beth could be the poster child for self absorbness (is that a word?). If not, I'm making it one!

For someone who "just wants everyone to get along", Ramona sure likes to cause dissension among all the women. I loved Lu telling her flat out to stop talking shit behind her back. 

[escatefromny]

It is a real chicken/egg thing with LuAnn for me.  I don't like how she is being treated and ganged up on by the "ladies" but God, she is insufferable and self centered.  

[BloggerAloud]

Quote

I find Dorinda's constant flip-flopping to be the biggest crime of the HWs this season. Especially when she tries to frame her actions as that of a peacemaker when she's really anything but.

Dorinda is being the Cynthia/Kandi of this group.

[annewithaneee]

The first 3/4 of this were filler-y, but the dinner was a balm to my soul. I love when they're all in one room, nattering over each other. Especially the prelude, where they seemingly paired off to have simultaneous loud conversations about fucking, and all I really caught was Sonja saying 'teabagging'. 

Ramona:

- She was actually adorable and considerate in the Bethenny visit they showed in flashback.

- Tiny, tween Noel had more soul taking breakdancing lessons in S1 than she did attempting sexy grapevining in that farce of a dance class.

Sonja: 

- I need specifics about her and Tom, and I need them yesterday. They were friends with bennies for a decade? A decade???

Bethenny:

- Her rooted, shake-n-go wig (or was is clip-in extensions?) was terrible. She needed volume. If I had hair/makeup people, you better believe I would show up in an event in full drag if I was opting for fun fake hair.

- She's never had surgery other than a c-section? Were her breast implants homeopathic?

- The whole "second opinion" thing was strange. Correct me if I'm wrong, but an "internist" is a general practitioner who does not take children as patients (vs a family doctor), correct? I'm hoping an actual appointment went down off-camera, because it was bizarre to see her offer a treatment plan and prescription based off of a five minute meeting without a physical exam or any plans for testing and imaging.

Jules:

- Her plastic surgeon acted, and talked, just like Dr. Frampf from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, and it made me giggle real hard.

Carole:

- Would we call her reaction being happy for Luann? To me, she reacted like I would if a barely-more-than-acquaintances-friend explained she was converting to Scientology for her significant other. Vaguely alarmed, feigning polite encouragement, eyeing the nearest exit.

Luann:

- I'm so glad we're getting throwback Luann, when her self-awareness was nearly nonexistent and her imperiousness was sky-high. She's chasing her payday and expecting everyone to buy this starry-eyed soulmate story that she's peddling, hard. Her joy, and insistence that everyone join the chorus, is pathological and so much fun to watch.

[Umbelina]

"There are other holes."  Thanks Jules.

Luann should have just said Tom is a middle aged man, of course he's had other relationships with women, and moved along.  The overreaction just made her look insecure.

That female doctor who advised Bethenny was whack. 

[SweetieDarling]

Did anyone else have visions of Carole clearing the table of wine and water glasses with a sweep of one of those bell sleeves? 

[BlackMamba]

And more product placement by Bethenny. 

It must be in her contract (along with nice little 10% cut Andy and Bravo gets)  that she has to have Skinnyshit products being promoted every 3 episodes.   I swear it's becoming overkill and it's becoming clear that Skinnyshit isn't making huge profits. 

[escatefromny]

And, Bethany:

For the millionth time, it is your uterus, not your vagina, that is having issues;

Educate yourself about birth control!  An IUD (talk about throwback methods!) acts by irritating your uterine lining. Big fucking surprise you're having bleeding issues.  A simple barrier method like the diaphragm or cervical cap is much less damaging to your body.  (Courtesy of 1984 sex Ed class, gheeeze!)

IUDs fell out of favor for the precise reasons Bethany is experiencing (oh, and the huge class action suit), it took weeks of hysteria for her figure any of this out and a consult with a run of the mill internist?!?!

Edited July 7, 2016 by escatefromny

[mbaywife123]

I am growing very tired the Bethenney of New York show.

Lu seems happy, leave her alone and let her be. Sure she is all Me,Me, Me right now she is excited that she may have found love again.

Ramona, still crazy after all these years and living on her own planet.

Dorinda, quit flip flopping.

Seems Carole may have been pushed out by one of Bethenney's fibroids. Beth was being a side sniping bitch to her at the dinner.

Jules, not interested enough to have any comments.

[WireWrap]

15 minutes ago, Straycat80 said:

Can Jules get a different storyline already? So tired of hearing about her wounded vagina! 

Anyone else notice how hoarse Lu's voice was when she met up with Dorinda and then in a few minutes her voice was normal? 

Why did Bethenny have to get all made up like a 14 year old pop singer to schlepp her new candy? She looked stupid.

Not a fan of Luann's but she's right, I think these 'bitches' are being horrible to her , especially Sawn-ya who is suppose to be her friend. Keep the fact that you whored around with Tom to yourself, don't rub it in Lu's face. Are some of these women jealous that Lu found a man she (thinks) she'll be happy with? 

Sure, as soon as Bethenny stop talking about bleeding, fibroids and surgery/no surgery! LOL Seriously though, Bethenny pretty much said the same thing about Jules and her injury in her blog. LOL Like we all aren't tired of hearing about her crap and we have heard/seen more about Bethenny/fibroids more than Jules/hematoma. 

[beesknees]

What in the fuck was the deal with Carole and those sleeves?  Good Gordon it looked like she was wearing a pair of bell bottoms on her arms.  FF'd most of the medical talk (Beth and Jules).  I.just.can't.

[Talented Tenth]

The best best Bethenny ever looked was at the Skinnygirl event with the red wig and makeup.  That should be her permanent makeup look.

[jinjer]

Loved the subtitles for Jules's Dr. Lol

I think Luann is just trolling them all with her Tom Happiness.  But I do appreciate her take no prisoners attitude with Ramona.

Thanks to the poster who referenced Sonja saying tea bagging. Now Jules talking about balls and making the dipping motion makes sense.

[poeticlicensed]

Lu is completely delusional but I love that she is over those bitches and says so. It's almost scary how she ties her self worth to having a man. 

I am done with Beth and her fibroids. Yes surgery is scary as hell but really bioidentical hormones when she said her fibroids were the size of tennis balls. Apparently hormone treatment didn't work ( color me shocked) and she ended up having surgery. 

I am so tired of listening to these bitches misidentify female anatomy. Fibroids are in your uterus not you vagina. 

[mbaywife123]

14 minutes ago, beesknees said:

What in the fuck was the deal with Carole and those sleeves?  Good Gordon it looked like she was wearing a pair of bell bottoms on her arms.  FF'd most of the medical talk (Beth and Jules).  I.just.can't.

She looked like an arms downward version of the candlestick from Beauty and the Beast.

[dosodog]

I keep forgetting to say this:  Dorinda and Sonia look stunning in the car commercial.  I really like Dorinda's hairstyle and color.

Lunn handled Ramona and Ramona lied, lied and lied.  Forgive me, but in the words of Lisa Rinna, say it with me we all know where it's going.....OWN IT! I deal with the same crap at work and it fascinates me how quickly people backpeddle when you look them in the eye and call them out for the inability to say their shit to your face.

[UsernameFatigue]

28 minutes ago, escatefromny said:

It is a real chicken/egg thing with LuAnn for me.  I don't like how she is being treated and ganged up on by the "ladies" but God, she is insufferable and self centered.

After reading ( I didn't get the special on the Countess where I live) that Lu married the count after a couple of weeks I decided to try to give her a break regarding how stupid I think her insta relationship with Tom is. But then she goes for lunch (or was it breakfast?) with Dorinda and after Dorinda places her order with the waiter the Countess feels the need to place her order in French. So yep, insufferable and self centered. And pretentious. Ugh.

Luann does seem to change her reaction to Sonja's claim rather often. Now Sonja's claim that Tom was a friend with benefits for 10 years is reduced to no friend, just benefits? Tom looked better when he was at least a friend. Did she dispute the 10 year thing this time? It is hard to keep up. I wonder if Bravo will show the clip that Tom was in from Season One (I think it was?).

Dorinda imitating Ramona may have been one of the funniest things I have ever seen on this show. I wonder if she does anyone else? She may have missed her calling.

[BloggerAloud]

Them bringing up the Harry stuff in regards to Luann and Sonja seemed a bit ridiculous since they hashed all of that out at the season six reunion I think and a lot of that ended up being a lot of shadiness in terms of production since, if I remember correctly, Luann didn't leave with Harry by herself.

[HunterHunted]

Bethenny's hair dude is named Tokyo Style?!? Eyerolls. Sigh. I've since found out that he's Kylie Jenner's wigologist.

You know how WWHL has the Clubhouse Playhouse? This season has been like that with every housewife busting out some impression of another wife.

I'm sick and tired of hearing about Jules' vulva. Her injury makes no sense. I'm tired of her talking about her genitals like a toddler. My coochie coo.

9 minutes ago, KFC said:

I find Dorinda's constant flip-flopping to be the biggest crime of the HWs this season. Especially when she tries to frame her actions as that of a peacemaker when she's really anything but.

It's bullshit. There was nothing altruistic about it especially since Dorinda was more than happy to lay into LuAnn in the Berkshires even though Bethenny was the one starting shit.

While Ramona and Sonja might be jealous of LuAnn, Bethenny and Carole certainly aren't. The reason these bitches aren't happy for LuAnn is because she was an asshole to Carole and she refuses sufficiently prostrate herself to make up for being an epic asshole. Carole's bestie Bethenny is the boss bitch and feels like LuAnn hasn't done right by her friend. The rest of these bitches are trying not to get on the wrong side of the boss bitch.

I find LuAnn's willful ignorance about what's going in this pack of feral bitches infuriating. Like she gets it, but refuses to do the thing that's necessary. She started this season trying to suck up to Bethenny with Carlos Falchi purses and big apologies hoping that it would be enough. It wasn't because LuAnn is fundamentally at her core a user. And everyone sensed that "sorry I called you a pedafile. I hope you can come to my next party" was not a heartfelt apology. The other thing that LuAnn doesn't get is that even though Sonja came at Bethenny's business, Sonja has demonstrated that she's willing to supplicate herself in front of Bethenny. LuAnn, you're the omega now.

It's amazing the kind of business Dylan Lauren has managed to make largely selling candy made by other companies.

[BlackMamba]

Bethenny still calling LuAnn a "narcissist" 

Thats true but isn't Bethenny the queen of narcissism!  Her taking pictures in her daughter's baby clothes,  her continuing divorce and her bloody cooch. 

Seriously pot called kettle anyone!  ?

[Straycat80]

31 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

Sure, as soon as Bethenny stop talking about bleeding, fibroids and surgery/no surgery! LOL Seriously though, Bethenny pretty much said the same thing about Jules and her injury in her blog. LOL Like we all aren't tired of hearing about her crap and we have heard/seen more about Bethenny/fibroids more than Jules/hematoma. 

Oh I agree! And Bethenny has to go all gorey detail about it too! Bloodbath! Bloody pillow in the car. Talking to her driver ( poor guy!) about it. She makes it sound like her whole  body has been drained of blood. And Bethenny is calling LuAnn self absorbed and a narcissist? Lol! 

[Knuckles]

According to Beth, every doctor in Manhattan has looked at her vagina...what a thrill for them. And after all, she ends up with smarmy doctor who doesn't even bother with a physical. Yeah, that makes total sense. Note to Mr. Cohen, this fibroid drama is beyond tedious...have you nothing else to offer? I switched to a rerun of Law and Order for a while, hoping it would pass.

Carole deserves jack. She has never made an insightful or witty remark, she simply occupies space as Beth's wingman. Exactly how many apologies does she think she should be offered? Milking her need for endless apologies is the extent of her storyline...oh, and arranging a dog wedding. If there is nothing more here, can we lose her and find someone interesting?

And of course, Beth, the queen of self-involvement proclaims Lu the owner of the toxic narcissism award. Yeah right. Still waiting for the announcement of the Skinnygirl panty liners and sanitary pads. 

Of course they hate you Lu because you might be happy. And rich and happy....they cannot bear the thought. With any luck the marriage will make it possible for you to blow this pop stand and these bitches...I'll miss you, but you deserve better than this coven of hags.

[HunterHunted]

Quote

Jules:

- Her plastic surgeon acted, and talked, just like Dr. Frampf from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, and it made me giggle real hard.

Don't know if you knew that the real doctor who inspired the Dr. Franff character killed himself.

http://www.people.com/article/unbreakable-kimmy-schmidt-not-cause-dr-fredric-brandt-suicide

[Sheenieb]

Lu was like:

Everyone is over Carole/Lu except Carole. I guess she expects an apology in blood.

I giggled at Ramona saying brassiere. Old school terms amuse me. It's like when someone says 'pocketbook.' It makes me think of a grandma. Ramona probably carries around a change purse, too.

Are we feeling Bethenny's Skinnygirl clutch? Because I wasn't. I also found it strange that she had paparazzi and a step and repeat during a daytime event. I thought her thing was happening at night since that's usually when HW events occur.

[beesknees]

11 minutes ago, Sheenieb said:

Lu was like:

Everyone is over Carole/Lu except Carole. I guess she expects an apology in blood.

I giggled at Ramona saying brassiere. Old school terms amuse me. It's like when someone says 'pocketbook.' It makes me think of a grandma. Ramona probably carries around a change purse, too.

Are we feeling Bethenny's Skinnygirl clutch? Because I wasn't. I also found it strange that she had paparazzi and a step and repeat during a daytime event. I thought her thing was happening at night since that's usually when HW events occur.

My grandma used to say "bed clothes" instead of sheets.  As a little girl she used to say to me "Help me change the bed clothes".  The first time my boyfriend heard me say that he was all like "WTF did you just say to me?"  Even now, many decades later I slip and say that sometimes ;)

[breezy424]

God, I'm so tired of hearing about Beth's bloodbath in the car.  And, Jules pistachio or whatever she's calling it this week.

Ramona - you're lying and we all know it.

So Carole is ok with Lu to her face but not so much behind her back.

Beth's problem isn't going to be solved by every Jewish Doctor in NY looking at her vagina.  It would be much more helpful if they looked at her uterus.  Just sayin.  Not loving your red hair look while carrying a UPS envelope.  Note - the clutch comment was made by someone else (who I can't remember) in the first looks thread.  Full credit to that poster.  It was spot on.

As for IUDs....  Most women handle IUDs just fine.  I had one many years ago and had no problem with it.  IUDs'  fell out of favor because of the Dalkon shield.  Research has shown that today's IUD are safe overall.  

[WordsWordsWords]

Good heavens, what an episode. I'm not a fan of Jules and her "pistachio" drama.

Every one of these women needs to grow up. They're all chronological adults and mental teenagers. Their teenagerness showed up in force tonight.

We saw two doctors tonight, and I thought they were both creepy and sketchy.

Man, Ramona's dancing makes my twitchy, off-the-beat flailing look positively balletic.

I'm so glad I can sit here in the comfort of my living room and watch this train wreck without worrying about getting my head handed to me by an erstwhile Countess or an aging party girl or a snappish businesswoman.

[ivygirl]

The medical talk tonight had me like: 

"What's wrong with me?"

"I think you're crazy."

"Want a second opinion."

"You're also lazy."

(Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius! Oh, Dr. Zaius!)

 

And, it almost (not really but almost) had me longing for the days when Lucy couldn't even mention she was pregnant on air. I've had my fill of televised female anatomy talk, thanks. 

Edited July 7, 2016 by ivygirl

[Showthyme]

Except for fibroids, Bethenny has nothing to offer this season. She doesn't want to talk about her relationship with her married boyfriend and there is nothing newsworthy on the business/divorce front. Carole and Bethenny have to snark on LuAnn or there would be radio silence.

Bethenny calling LuAnn a narcissist is my new all time HW favorite moment. More comical than RHoOC Vicki Gunvalson getting hit in the head with a football.

[izabella]

Is Bethy pulling a Yolanda here with that doctor she saw?  Why is that woman prescribing progesterone without having done a hormone work-up?  Does Bethy's fibroid doctor know what this other doctor is giving her now, or is this happening without her knowledge? 

Ramona does not have an ounce of rhythm.  Mrs. Wiggins and Elaine Benis rolled into one.

Why did Sonja bring up fwb with Tom, again, when she already told Lu about it in her kitchen, when Lu first brought up that she and Tom were in love and would be getting married?  She and Lu talked about it, so did Sonja forget?  Or did she want to broadcast it to everyone, even though Ramona had already done that, too?

I'm glad Lu told Ramona to stop talking behind her back.  Carole and Ramona have no story lines this season whatsoever, so I guess ragging on Lu is all they have.

[Primetimer]

The other women are definitely cool to LuAnn. Okay, more like ice-cold. What does a Countess have to do for the bitches in her life to be happy for her?

View the full article

[PhilMarlowe2]

I don't really buy that the other women are jealous of Lu's relationship because no one ever gave her any grief about Jacques. I think Lu does seem a bit off-her-rocker with this guy, and he does seem sketchy. That said, the women need to stop piling on her. They make her seem sympathetic by default.

[ivygirl]

"We all have three sides: the good, the bad, the ugly, the nice..."

Oh, Ramona. ;)

Edited July 7, 2016 by ivygirl

[zoeysmom]

6 minutes ago, PhilMarlowe2 said:

I don't really buy that the other women are jealous of Lu's relationship because no one ever gave her any grief about Jacques. I think Lu does seem a bit off-her-rocker with this guy, and he does seem sketchy. That said, the women need to stop piling on her. They make her seem sympathetic by default.

I remember quite clearly Sonja breaking down at Luann's Christmas Party and saying Jacques wasn't right for her and she was worried Jacques would hurt Luann.    It was the one with the band that changed the lyrics to Christmas carols to not suitable for airing. http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new-york-city/season-5/videos/all-in-or-get-out Mario and Ramona were making fun of Jacques and his accent.  So I think the idea these women are ever truly happy for Luann is fleeting.  Sonja also was on the outs with Luann after the facialist calling Jacques a short little Frenchman who Luann bossed around.

I think Sonja is jealous because she is tired of being alone and Ramona is very jealous because she embarked on her post divorce journey with the idea she would be remarried in two years.

[DelicateDee]

Loved Bethenny's look for the candy products launch.  She looked fresh and refreshed and her dress was perfect for her look.  Those treats looked yummy too!  

[ninjago]

Jesus, Carole, give it a rest.  

Ramona and Sonja I can see being jealous of Lu, since I think they'd both like to be getting remarried to a rich man.  Beth and Carole are big time practitioners of Tall Poppy Syndrome-begrudging anyone who achieves anything to set them apart from the rest of the crowd.  And I don't think Lu's "achievement" is her engagement-it's her happiness.

Edited July 7, 2016 by ninjago

[athousandclowns]

I think Izabella  Sonja said truly shocked , you've just been seeing him a few weeks right ? Lu responded something about since Thansgiving. Then in the TH Sonja said she was with him at Thansgiving and they've had a long relationship.   Anyone remember it that way also?  

Edited July 7, 2016 by athousandclowns

[Umbelina]

Carol takes huge forkfuls of food.

Ramona's extensions are ratty looking.

Luann looks 7 years older than she did last year, and her forehead moves!  I guess botox was getting too expensive for her.

[Lizzing]

If Luann is going to get all high and mighty* with the crowd, she could do us all a favor and skip the etiquette lessons she's known for and go back to her nurse training and teach proper anatomical terms to these loons.

*I'm not sure she's all that high and mighty anyway right now (though definitely was in the seasons before she was demoted).  Off in her own world with Tom, sure.  A bit of her smugness returned due to being with a man with money, definitely.  But she's right; if these women were her friends, or even just workplace proximity associates, they'd at least feign being happy for her.  Tom is not a Brooks scam character that needs to be run out of town on a rail.  Even if they all think it's a passing fancy, just leave Lu be to drone on about "soul mates" like some starry eyed 16 year old.  It's hurting no one.

Re: Jules' doctor....was it just me, or did he have crazy eyes and was off puttingly creepy?  I couldn't tell if he OD'd on facial botox and had problems blinking and making facial expressions, or if perhaps something was really off with him.

I can't decide if Dorinda is just a shit stirrer or a willing producer pawn to go film with various factions (CBR/S/L) to give a through thread for the story.  Maybe it's a bit of both; if she doesn't piss any one faction off too much, she can increase her camera time/show value by being a utility player.

[Avaleigh]

1 hour ago, Showthyme said:

Except for fibroids, Bethenny has nothing to offer this season. She doesn't want to talk about her relationship with her married boyfriend and there is nothing newsworthy on the business/divorce front. Carole and Bethenny have to snark on LuAnn or there would be radio silence.

Bethenny calling LuAnn a narcissist is my new all time HW favorite moment. More comical than RHoOC Vicki Gunvalson getting hit in the head with a football.

It doesn't top Vicki and the football, but I agree that this was an all time great RH moment. After X amount of years, I still giggle like a loon at remembering this moment with Vicki. I still recall some brilliant poster over at TWoP describing this moment as a heat seeking missile making contact. I would be totally fine seeing Bethenny accidentally get hit in the head with a football.

Regarding the episode, I'm so bored with Bethenny and I find Ramona to be insufferable. Jules is boring. I don't dislike her but she seems like a one and done.

Too true that Ramona's extensions are the worst. 

Agreed about Dorinda being a wishy washy, contradictory flake. I like her on the show because she's weirdly insightful at times, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't get on my nerves with all of her inconsistent bullshit.

[film noire]

5 hours ago, beesknees said:

What in the fuck was the deal with Carole and those sleeves?  

They have fashion fibroids. 

Luann continued her "Lace" winning streak tonight -- "Which one of you bitches is my friend!!?" -- none, Countess, not a one. And that's okay, because who needs these people as friends? Just fuck 'em (what a crew: Carole and her crazed Anne Boleyn sleeves,  Bethenny, desperate for attention,  eyeing the crowd like a hungry lemur dressed in a Dynasty costume, Jules counting up her sex holes and relieved she'd been able to throw her sweaty tights on the Kleenex box in the doc's office, giving her at least one scene not involving food -- unless you count swallowing all your pride as a meal plan -- and Sonja, poor Sonja,  delighted to be anywhere but standing in front of the hoarded multiple bottles of Wesson in her basement. Go ahead and fuck em, Countess.  You do you: red lips a-quiver while looking at your phone, not even bothering to look at Singer while throwing out your first question about loyalty,  because Ramona is your fucking Fredo:  "I know it was you!"  Yes, you did know that, Luann. Everybody knew that. What you don't know is Dorinda is Mrs. Corleone, whipping up lasagna from Mama's recipe and believing she can walk both roads, talk trash about people talking trash --  "Who's naive now, Kay?" -- pick a goddamn side, Dorinda.  Luann has met her soulmate and we're going to the mattresses, pick a GODDAMN SIDE. You'll need a consigliere, Lu -- perhaps Carole will suit? That "I'm happy for you" had all the sincerity of John Gotti's lawyer calling  him a "simple businessman" -- with benefits, one presumes -- you're in waste management with these women, Luann, and this shit doesn't flush itself. But I think you know that too.)

Edited July 7, 2016 by film noire

[BlackMamba]

Tweets of the night