Season 3 Discussion

[Brooklynista]

5 hours ago, RedheadZombie said:

I watched tonight's episode and thought - this just can't be real.   These people cannot be for real.   Do people really act like this?  The gaslighting is out of this world.

Good morning, Pedro!  Did you sleep well?  Let's talk about your taking advantage of our daughter by harvesting her American money.

What a lovely dinner with wine that "some of us" shouldn't drink.  So we're totally going to hire an investigator to out your mother's wedding scam that harvests the red-blooded American's money.  Why are you leaving the table? Are you not hungry?

Oh, it's so beautiful outside in nature.  We've lost our way but Father Chantel's divining stick will save us all.  Did you two have a nice talk?  Why won't you talk to us, Pedro?  We just want to get to know you.  This is a family vacation.

Pedro should have taken that dinner as an opportunity to ask some "getting to know you" questions of his new family.

Perhaps start with River. "Do you only want to be in the room the next time I bang your sister? Or do you want to be tagged in?"

River's obsession with Chantel is creepy at the least and it's only gotten worse since she got new tits.

[CoachWristletJen]

8 minutes ago, Brooklynista said:

Pedro should have taken that dinner as an opportunity to ask some "getting to know you" questions of his new family.

Perhaps start with River. "Do you only want to be in the room the next time I bang your sister? Or do you want to be tagged in?"

River's obsession with Chantel is creepy at the least and it's only gotten worse since she got new tits.

Eraserhead wouldn't be nearly as bold without his mom and his sister to back him up.

[zenme]

4 hours ago, DVDFreaker said:

I do not know if Molly will keep Luis because he would not shut up about missing clubs and partying, he is too immature to stay in a marriage 

Molly married a young 20-something from a macho culture. He thought he was getting vacation Molly, and didn't realize he was going to be Alice from the Brady Bunch.  This is a big cultural change for him. I don't know what either of them were thinking. One day he's a club- going, childless and single bartender, and the next day he's expected to be Americanized father, who helps with cooking and cleaning, and understands how to manage kids. Tall order, Molly. I blame her. Her kids and their needs come first, she's older, and she should have thought the whole thing through. 

[lucy711]

Ashley has a poor way of expressing herself, but I understand her point.  Her dad, aka the weeble, abandoned his family for four years.  He has to acknowledge the pain and the difficulties that created before pretending that everything is normal.  And yes, she has the right to be mad that she, her brother, and her kids are essentially an afterthought to his new "25 year old" wife.

I really hope most of these story lines are scripted.  But that is just as bad because no self-respecting person would want to be party to any of this.

[firefly]

9 hours ago, For Cereals said:

Has Nicole not learned anything about customs or culture?  Plus, has she even confirmed any wedding details?  I feel like there’s a lot of assuming happening on her part.  Her mom is just dumb for playing along.

 

If she had spent some of the time that she uses staring at the phone willing it to ring to go online and research Moroccan wedding/Islamic wedding customs/interfaith marriage issues she might have proceeded a bit more cautiously. As it stands she is assuming that HER wedding is going to take place when SHE says that it is and the way that SHE wants it.

Marriage of equals......pfffft. I do not see this ending well!

[annewithaneee]

Family Chantal reminds me of some classic Judge Judy defendants, thinking that with some (hilariously bad) styling and plenty of two-dollar words nobody will be able to see through their BS. Her mom with all that "be it, or otherwise, monetarily" nonsense, just amazing. 

What was the wine they ended up pairing with dinner, Mountain Dew??? It was bright yellow and full of ice cubes. They truly are the epitome of class.

[Pondlass1]

39 minutes ago, lucy711 said:

 

I really hope most of these story lines are scripted.

I don't know about scripted.... but definitely edited and situations set up for TV entertainment and ratings.  The night out with Pao and Juan for instance.  And the never-ending log cabin holiday with Pedro and Family Chantel (BTW if Pedro's DR family were 'harvesting for dollars' then surely Pedro would be nice as pie all the time in order to harvest even more dollar from the Family Chantel).

However, Nichole's delusional world seems real (otherwise give that girl an Emmy).  How could she look at herself in the mirror in that wildly inappropriate dress and not be horrified?  

Anfisa should return to Russia.  I  get the impression she is genuinely unhappy but maybe has signed a contract and must stick around with dough boy.  Same thing with 'Louise', he wants out and to go back to the DR clubs ... but the show won't let him go maybe?

David gives me the willies.  And what is it with the black eyebrows on this show?  

[TaraS1]

I realize Molly isn't known for her clear-eyed thinking here, but....can she honestly not see the way Luis looks at her?  The contempt he has for her is palpable, and yet she's all, "So you're telling me there's a chance you want to be a stepdad and house husband, right?  Right?!"  No, Molly.  No chance.  This dude cannot stand you or your kids.  He does seem to have a thing for your mom and brother, though...

So did we know Mother Pedro was an immigration lawyer?  And did I understand correctly that Chantel didn't even know? 

[Rt66vintage]

Did anyone else cringe multiple times when Nicole kept grabbing the bodice of the wedding dress to tug it up? I wonder  how they keep those dresses clean. She's going to be making that low-rent motion the entire time she has the dress on.

[jumper sage]

1 hour ago, zenme said:

He thought he was getting vacation Molly, and didn't realize he was going to be Alice from the Brady Bunch.

You owe me a mouthful of Mountain Dew!

[Pepper Mostly]

10 hours ago, guilfoyleatpp said:

Also, I would LOVE to know what Nicole's stepdad thinks "a Muslim wedding" looks like. He keeps saying it like it's some sort of 3 day slog with multiple costume changes and no air conditioning. I'm sure it's something he's heard described on Alex Jones. I just want to know. 

Seriously, people, Google is your friend. Five minutes with the google machine would tell you that Islam does not require a woman to change her religion to marry a Muslim man. That whole "will you be married AS A MUSLIM?" was so offensive. Like it would be a complete sham if she marries in a Muslim ceremony.

9 hours ago, Splithair said:

I can't with Juan, either. He needs to get his own damn life. I can't decide who is more of a petulant child - Juan or Nicole. Agree with someone above that Pao uses him to say the things she wants to say to Russ. We get it Pao, you were miserable in OK. Time to get over it.

I don't get Juan (or Pao's family, for that matter). Is Pao some sort of Patty Play Pal doll with no agency or free will? Everyone is just gutted that she is a grown ass woman with her own wants and needs. "Russ took you away from us!" "You abandoned me!" "How dare you find a man and get married!" Dear lord. Alexei's friends in Israel were the same way, that evil Jezebel Loren stole their bright angel Alexei away and they're all so depressed they can't leave their rooms.

Juan is a poisonous little snake, anyway. The emotional blackmail of Pao is disgusting. If he was her friend he would be her friend. Pao is so weak and spineless. Shallow and self centered. Ugh. The two of them. Each one uses the other to prop up their ego.

8 hours ago, RedheadZombie said:

I watched tonight's episode and thought - this just can't be real.   These people cannot be for real.   Do people really act like this?  The gaslighting is out of this world.

Good morning, Pedro!  Did you sleep well?  Let's talk about your taking advantage of our daughter by harvesting her American money.

What a lovely dinner with wine that "some of us" shouldn't drink.  So we're totally going to hire an investigator to out your mother's wedding scam that harvests the red-blooded American's money.  Why are you leaving the table? Are you not hungry?

Oh, it's so beautiful outside in nature.  We've lost our way but Father Chantel's divining stick will save us all.  Did you two have a nice talk?  Why won't you talk to us, Pedro?  We just want to get to know you.  This is a family vacation.

Family Chantel. Sigh. What dreadful, dreadful people. Mama and Papa couldn't even wait for the rest of the family before they starting piling on, huh?

They hike? I would never have figured them for the outdoorsy type.

If Pedro was "harvesting American money" (LOL), why is he working two jobs?  And really, Mother Chantel? A marriage ring? You think that if Pedro's family were professional scammers trawling the waters for American princesses, they'd latch on to your struggling student daughter?

The thing I hate the most is their wide eyed consternation when Pedro gets mad. "What? Did I say anything wrong?" when they just insulted him, his mother and the rest of his family, to his face.

2 hours ago, Brooklynista said:

Pedro should have taken that dinner as an opportunity to ask some "getting to know you" questions of his new family.

Perhaps start with River. "Do you only want to be in the room the next time I bang your sister? Or do you want to be tagged in?"

River's obsession with Chantel is creepy at the least and it's only gotten worse since she got new tits.

River is insanely creepy, and that's saying something since the whole family is in the red zone on the Creep-O-Meter.

59 minutes ago, Rt66vintage said:

Did anyone else cringe multiple times when Nicole kept grabbing the bodice of the wedding dress to tug it up? I wonder  how they keep those dresses clean. She's going to be making that low-rent motion the entire time she has the dress on.

Klassy!

Seriously, I went to a wedding once and one of the bridesmaids spent the entire ceremony yanking at her dress, messing with her flowers, fiddling with her gloves and mouthing stuff to her friends. It was so distracting and uncouth.

Edited June 11, 2018 by Pepper Mostly

[AZChristian]

Every week, I comment to Mr. AZC, "I can't believe we waste even one second of our lives watching this ridiculousness.  Do you want to stay here in the living room until it's over, or should we go in and start turning down the bed and watch it in the bedroom?"

[Dobian]

6 hours ago, DVDFreaker said:

I do not know if Molly will keep Luis because he would not shut up about missing clubs and partying, he is too immature to stay in a marriage 

Well that's not Molly keeping him, that's Luis bailing on her.  She has no control over that.

[gunderda]

On 6/4/2018 at 2:39 AM, silverspoons said:

David and Annie edit seems off? First the son is moving in with him because he has nowhere to go? David and Annie state they do not talk to his older daughter at all.

Then we see David and Annie walking poor Jacob down the hall to his sister's. After a few minutes time, talking with his daughter poor Jacob says it is time for him to sleep and he goes into a bedroom at the sister's house. The whole time David's granddaughter is hugging and laying in Annie's lap. This does not seem like a child that has only met Annie once at a wedding? 

I questioned Annie and David's granddaughter being all snuggly too.  I guess some little kids can do that quickly but Annie has never seemed the type to warm up that fast to anyone in that family.   But him staying at David's daughter's house seemed more to me like he was off to his mom's the next day and maybe David and his ex dont' want to be around each other so David's daughter might be acting like the middle man in order for their mom to come pick him up.

On 6/4/2018 at 7:14 AM, Granny58 said:

Me too.  The only "blood type" issues I've ever heard of are rH issues, and don't they typically kick in after a third pregnancy?  Anybody else hear of other "blood type" problems?

Neck and neck race with Nicole's father's weird beard.  

Erin from the Bate's family had some sort of blood type that made her have a bunch of miscarriages.  She eventually had to get shots while pregnant for her first child.  Not sure if it continued for her 2nd and 3rd. 

On 6/4/2018 at 8:51 PM, gonecrackers said:

Annie actually softened this week, at least momentarily for Jacob's sake.  She doesn't like burgers & fries - has this woman not yet been introduced to a supermarket?  

Annie doesn't hate the food too much obviously.. she's gained a bunch of weight since coming to the US. 

On 6/4/2018 at 9:21 PM, zenme said:

Oy vey! I really hate that people insinuate Luis is a pedophile. Pedophiles are the lowest of the low. The scourge of the earth. It seems to me Luis does not try to groom his "prey," if this were the case.  He might be a little more excited about hanging out with Kinsey alone if he were a pedo.   I don't know where it has been shown that Luis is attracted to kids. There may be something about Luis people may not like--he may be a jerk, or hate helping Molly around the house, but that doesn't mean he's a pedophile, speaking as someone who has been molested as a child. I tend to be hyper vigilant about these types of things, especially in my job as a teacher, and as a mom. I just hate the thought of someone being labeled as such an ugly, ugly thing. 

I agree - he has openly said that he doesn't like Molly's youngest best she's too wild and Molly doesn't really discipline her.  He told Molly's mom that he doesn't want to parent that way and I think he feels a bit stuck because he obviously can't discipline the child because he's the new stepdad. Molly's mom seems to like him and he even calls her Mom. 

On 6/4/2018 at 10:35 PM, Horrified said:

Exactly what I thought!  He's going to his Mom's in Texas because she has insurance?!?!  Was that poor kid discharged from the hospital with a bullet in his cheek because there was no money to remove it?  Yikes.  And.....sketchy friend or what? "playing" with a gun and pointing it at Sonny's head?  Did friend get arrested for that I wonder?  Was something more nefarious going on?

 

On 6/4/2018 at 11:46 PM, Marmiarmo said:

Also, isn't his mother a critical care nurse or something?  Because she'd be a lot better choice to care for him than David and Annie.

April update on Jacob

Poor Jacob!

Yea, David said his ex is a critical care nurse and he would get better care while being with her, especially after a surgery.  Their son not being in Texas should have nothing to do with how her insurance works for him. He's either on her plan or he's not. There could be a chance that her insurance needs him to use a specific hospital.

[Carly13817]

Did anyone else love the scene with Luis, the grandmother and Kensley playing in the snow? I loved the coat Luis was wearing! haha

[Mothra]

12 hours ago, iwasish said:

Any suggestions....

 

if she wears that dress... there could be an international incident between the US and Morocco. They’ll probably expel all Americans.

Agreed.  That's an aggressively awful sight, all that Nicole slopping over front and back.

And I'm flummoxed by her breezy assurances about it not having to be a Muslim wedding.  Even if it isn't a religious service (in which case, why the big wedding dress?), hasn't she learned by now that standards of female modesty are pretty conservative in Morocco?  I think appearing in public in any of the dresses she tried on would get her stoned in the street--and they should get her at least yelled at in this country, too.  She has absolutely no idea of what her body looks like, none.

Furthermore, her trying to entice Azan with "we can have that big wedding your mother wants" sounds like a traditional i.e. Muslim wedding to me.  It's telling that we have not heard anything from Azan about wedding plans.  Although I haven't finished watching the episode, so maybe later he's all Wedding Planner Central.  Yeah, right.

12 hours ago, Lucky Santangelo said:

The only other possible success story is Annie.  She should be taking English lessons now -I'm in Canada and they're free for immigrants, I would expect the same for folk in the US. 

Nothing is free in the US.

[bichonblitz]

13 hours ago, pollywood said:

is it just me, or does it seem like pedro and luis are gaslighting the hell out of their wives?

No, not just you, and don't forget Azan. Master gaslighter, manipulator, user, lier. Did I leave anything out? lol 

Edited June 11, 2018 by bichonblitz

[islandgal140]

Nicole comes out of dressing room with her udders about to spill forth from her strapless wedding dress

Mama Nicole: Do you have shawl for her to cover up

Wedding Consultant: "A shawl won't cover that."

I died!!

[Mrs. Hanson]

50 minutes ago, Mothra said:

so maybe later he's all Wedding Planner Central.  Yeah, right.

Spoiler:  He wasn't.

 

44 minutes ago, islandgal140 said:

Wedding Consultant: "A shawl won't cover that."

 She was nicer than me:  REI's annual tent sale won't cover that.  Per Robbalee's spending $799 on that ugly poorly made dress and the expectation, per Nicole, that Mom would pay:  I have been married twice:  first dress I paid for myself, second wedding I had three dresses.  (Changed my mind on dress #1, changed my mind again on #2, ordered dress #3 off Amazon) - all FOUR, together, cost less than $799 plus, if I say so myself, they were all prettier.  I paid for them all myself.  God blessed me with a nice rack as well (although, to be blunt, mine are from genetics, not McDonald's) and they were all appropriate.  Why these short stout and......ahem......plentiful ladies demand strapless when they look horrid is beyond me.  You look like Kate Upton?  Go for it.  Nicole?  Not so much.

 

50 minutes ago, Mothra said:

And I'm flummoxed by her breezy assurances about it not having to be a Muslim wedding.

I am flummoxed by everything she does but her family is odd.  Even her stepfather:  "Explain it to us, please!"  She really couldn't.  I did not get the Alex Jones "OH MY GOD YOU ARE CONVERTING!" vibe from stepdad*, I just got a "Well, what kind of a wedding will it be?  Enlighten us!"  

She did not know what the hell kind of a service it was gonna be, all she knows is she is gonna be a Mrs, dammit!!!

*converting is not bad, it is just not in her wheelhouse.

Edited June 11, 2018 by Mrs. Hanson

[sasha206]

On 6/4/2018 at 10:21 PM, zenme said:

Oy vey! I really hate that people insinuate Luis is a pedophile. Pedophiles are the lowest of the low. The scourge of the earth. It seems to me Luis does not try to groom his "prey," if this were the case.  He might be a little more excited about hanging out with Kinsey alone if he were a pedo.   I don't know where it has been shown that Luis is attracted to kids. There may be something about Luis people may not like--he may be a jerk, or hate helping Molly around the house, but that doesn't mean he's a pedophile, speaking as someone who has been molested as a child. I tend to be hyper vigilant about these types of things, especially in my job as a teacher, and as a mom. I just hate the thought of someone being labeled as such an ugly, ugly thing. 

Very good point about grooming.  However, I think every woman in a relationship that has kids -- both young and teens -- should assume everyone she meets and brings home is a potential pedophile and not bring someone they've fucked on vacation and make him their house husband.  I'm not saying that all single moms should never date, never remarry.  But you have to proceed with caution when it comes to your children and bringing essentially a stranger into your household.  I've been dating someone for 8 months (someone I went to high school with).  I haven't introduced him to my 16 year-old daughter yet and have no plans to in the near future.  I see him when she has plans with her friends.  

Didn't Luis have some sort of creepy things come out of his mouth when they were talking about Olivia and her boyfriend?  Seems like there was something that gave me pause.  

Edited June 11, 2018 by sasha206

[SevenCostanza]

13 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Spoiler:  He wasn't.

 

 She was nicer than me:  REI's annual tent sale won't cover that.  Per Robbalee's spending $799 on that ugly poorly made dress and the expectation, per Nicole, that Mom would pay:  I have been married twice:  first dress I paid for myself, second wedding I had three dresses.  (Changed my mind on dress #1, changed my mind again on #2, ordered dress # off Amazon) - all FOUR, together, cost less than $799 plus, if I say so myself, they were all prettier.  I paid for them all myself.  God blessed me with a nice rack as well (although, to be blunt, mine are from genetics, not McDonald's) and they were all appropriate.  Why these short stout and......ahem......plentiful ladies demand strapless when they look horrid is beyond me.  You look like Kate Upton?  Go for it.  Nicole?  Not so much.

 

I am flummoxed by everything she does but her family is odd.  Even her stepfather:  "Explain it to us, please!"  She really couldn't.  I did not get the Alex Jones "OH MY GOD YOU ARE CONVERTING!" vibe from stepdad*, I just got a "Well, what kind of a wedding will it be?  Enlighten us!"  

She did not know what the hell kind of a service it was gonna be, all she knows is she is gonna be a Mrs, dammit!!!

*converting is not bad, it is just not in her wheelhouse.

She can't explain anything because she's clueless.   She lives in a fantasy world.  I couldn't believe how bratty she was at the dress shop to her mother "Well yea the bride's family pays for all the bride's stuff" , seriously?  And her mother just meekly goes along with it?  This is why Nichole is the giant, impulsive, brat you see today.  She needs a hard dose of real life. 

 

Why         does           Mother           Chantal            talk          this           way?    

 

David is gross.  And where does he get all these different cars?  Last night he got out of a reddish truck, the other episode when they went to the pawn shop they were driving a white car.

 

Molly and Luis, eh same old same old.

 

The other two couples I just fast forward through I find them really boring. 

[Mrs. Hanson]

7 minutes ago, SevenCostanza said:

Why         does           Mother           Chantal            talk          this           way?  

For the same reason Booby Chantel talks with her jaw clenched?  Not       sure     why.

[Mswldflwr]

I really like Robbalee, but she's truly exasperating me.  Robbalee, put your foot down with Nicole now.  Tell here, no, I'm not going to Morrocco to participate in this ridiculous marriage you're fantasizing about.  No, I'm not paying for your wedding dress.  And no, I will not continue to support your sizable ass financially while I know you're just pissing it away on that asshat from Morocco.  And tell her you will go after custody of Mae if she doesn't start doing right by that child.  The girl seriously needs a two-by-four-upside-the-head reality check and you're pretty much the only one that can give it to her.  Why do you continue to placate and coddle her?  It's  maddening.  I'm pretty sure her mental faculties got stunted at about the age of 15 and she's going to be stuck there the rest of her life unless she's dragged kicking and screaming forward into adulthood.                                                                                                                                                                                                     

[loki310]

Where is Mae’s dad?

Would he have anything to say about his daughter taken out of the country for an indeterminate amount of time?

[AnnieHeights]

Everyone in Nicole's life needs to be 100% honest with her......the dress was HORRIBLY unflattering on her........she is a crappy mother, Azan isn't the least bit into her as a woman, how can she be openly sending money to him from her part time job and turn around and expect her mother to pay for her wedding dress?  Oh yeah, her parents give into her on EVERYTHING!  The stepparents are the only ones who seem call her out in the least.  She is the poster child for someone who is completely enabled.  Oh and whining at her mother to 'stop' when she attempts to tell her the dress might be a little too revealing (to put it mildly) just makes me see red.

David disgusts me as well........although his daughter is an adult his past actions have obviously scarred her and allowing her to verbalize why she is angry and apologizing would be a really good start to this.  It isn't Annie's fault, this is all about his poor decisions and he needs to make amends with his children. 

Pao........seriously!  WTH?  I would be fearful to have a friend like whatever his name is.  Russ deserves better.  also, go back to your natural hair color please, you were so much prettier when you looked more natural.  Crayon Red isn't a good look. 

Family Chantel.....I would like to think they are just getting a bad edit but Mom needs to quit using the phrase 'Harvesting the American Dollar' it just sounds odd. 

Molly.......you need to hire a nanny.  I am not fond of Luis but he is too young and inexperienced and unwilling to become an instant father/maid/caretaker.               

[iwasish]

15 is generous, more like 5 or 6. When step dad was calling her out, she did that little kid thing of playing with her hair and sticking her fingers in her eyes and turning all blotchy. 

They have to demand straightforward answers from her, not mumbled bullshit.

[CoachWristletJen]

2 hours ago, Rt66vintage said:

Did anyone else cringe multiple times when Nicole kept grabbing the bodice of the wedding dress to tug it up? I wonder  how they keep those dresses clean. She's going to be making that low-rent motion the entire time she has the dress on.

In the event that Nicole's westernized Christian Muslim Moroccan dream wedding Extravaganza ever did go off without a hitch, I would fully expect to see barbecue sauce prints along the bodice line.

Edited June 11, 2018 by CoachWristletJen

[mellowjoi]

This show is a real struggle to watch.  If I was married to Pao, Chantel, or Luis I would be praying that it was all a scam and that when the green card comes I would be set free.  Annie, if I could get a time machine I would allow you to travel to the green card day so you could fly free of David.  

Family Chantel is the worst family.  They remind me of people who need someone to attack, if it wasn't Pedro then I'm thinking it's the other sister.  I believe that is why she says very little because she knows when Pedro is gone she becomes the target again.  Chantel started the whole mess with her family by lying to them about Pedro's US status/student etc.  Surely they watched the show and knows she lied and Pedro wanted to tell the truth but they never mention that subject.  Their selective memory only rivals that of Nicole's memory.  River needs to get out of their marriage and focus his attention on his hair.  The muppets do not want you representing them.  

Nicole is just stupid.  Her step-dad straight up told her the truth.  

[Mrs. Hanson]

26 minutes ago, AnnieHeights said:

Everyone in Nicole's life needs to be 100% honest with her......the dress was HORRIBLY unflattering on her........she is a crappy mother, Azan isn't the least bit into her as a woman, how can she be openly sending money to him from her part time job and turn around and expect her mother to pay for her wedding dress?  Oh yeah, her parents give into her on EVERYTHING!  The stepparents are the only ones who seem call her out in the least.  She is the poster child for someone who is completely enabled.  Oh and whining at her mother to 'stop' when she attempts to tell her the dress might be a little too revealing (to put it mildly) just makes me see red.

Yes yes and more yes.  I wish Robbalee would go to a Family Law attorney and pay him $50 just to draft a letter threatening a custody issue.  Per the father of Mae having a say:  My hunch is he is not listed on the birth certificate, thereby giving Baby Beluga full legal and physical custody.  (I am really embarrassed that I have spent any time thinking about this........)

Nicole is the worst:  Needy, determined and oblivious to everything.  EVERYTHING!!  Azan not being into her, her weight, the horrid dress, her daughter being borderline neglected, the reality of life.  A flight to Morocco is around $1800 round trip - where the hell are they getting the money?

[DVDFreaker]

8 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Yes yes and more yes.  I wish Robbalee would go to a Family Law attorney and pay him $50 just to draft a letter threatening a custody issue.  Per the father of Mae having a say:  My hunch is he is not listed on the birth certificate, thereby giving Baby Beluga full legal and physical custody.  (I am really embarrassed that I have spent any time thinking about this........)

Nicole is the worst:  Needy, determined and oblivious to everything.  EVERYTHING!!  Azan not being into her, her weight, the horrid dress, her daughter being borderline neglected, the reality of life.  A flight to Morocco is around $1800 round trip - where the hell are they getting the money?

Nicole has a job

[Mrs. Hanson]

2 minutes ago, DVDFreaker said:

Nicole has a job

Yes but an $1800 round trip to Morocco kinda job?  Plus sending money to Azan money?  PT Barista is not exactly flush.

[DVDFreaker]

1 minute ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Yes but an $1800 round trip to Morocco kinda job?  Plus sending money to Azan money?  PT Barista is not exactly flush.

She gets paid like $2,000 to be on the show so it probably came from that 

[Mrs. Hanson]

1 minute ago, DVDFreaker said:

She gets paid like $2,000 to be on the show so it probably came from that 

She could be banking that money, using it for, oh I don't know, an education fund for Mae.  better housing for her and her daughter but no, she pursues this dead end dream.    And that is her choice.  Jabba will learn someday but with this enabling family around her, it is doubtful.

[RedheadZombie]

Can you just imagine if Pao's and Russ's roles were reversed?  Russ has an attractive female BFF who hates Pao, actively works to break up their marriage, and gets in Pao's face with insults and middle fingers.  And then Russ sticks with female BFF when Pao stalks off insulted.  Russ doesn't even ask for Pao to dump Juan, he simply doesn't want to be around him.

Juan is one of the prissiest little bitches I've ever seen.  They don't even live in the same country yet he expects to be chosen over the husband.  The guy needs to sober up for five minutes and take a look around.  And that goes for his stupid "don't do this to him" friend.

[DVDFreaker]

4 hours ago, Brooklynista said:

Pedro should have taken that dinner as an opportunity to ask some "getting to know you" questions of his new family.

Perhaps start with River. "Do you only want to be in the room the next time I bang your sister? Or do you want to be tagged in?"

River's obsession with Chantel is creepy at the least and it's only gotten worse since she got new tits.

She never got new tits, it just grew bigger, I remember seeing a link around here talking about if she got new tits and the link confirmed that she never did

10 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

She could be banking that money, using it for, oh I don't know, an education fund for Mae.  better housing for her and her daughter but no, she pursues this dead end dream.    And that is her choice.  Jabba will learn someday but with this enabling family around her, it is doubtful.

It is sad really

Edited June 11, 2018 by DVDFreaker

[Former Nun]

2 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:

River is insanely creepy, and that's saying something since the whole family is in the red zone on the Creep-O-Meter.

[lucy711]

I notice there isn't a lot of talk about Jorge and Anfisa.  Is everyone else as tired as them as I am?  Anfisa needs to just let him go forever.  If she is working and/or in school she will meet more interesting people to befriend or to date.  I can't imagine spending ten minutes with that pathetic man!

[Gobi]

I think that somewhere in another thread, it was said that Mae's father was an immigrant who ran back to his homeland.

Juan wants what, exactly, for Pao? Does he think they can be in their twenties and drunk forever?

[Former Nun]

23 minutes ago, DVDFreaker said:

She gets paid like $2,000 to be on the show so it probably came from that 

Is that all?  Seems like she's getting ripped off.

[Mothra]

13 hours ago, Suzywriter said:

She was an adult with a family of her own when her father went to Thailand.  He is now remarried...why does  she carp about her father "putting his wife first"? What does she expect her father to do to prove that SHE, the daughter, is queen and Annie is some kind of mistake for which her father should apologize.

 Ashley needs a tranquilizer dart.

Exactly what I've been thinking.  Your kids come first when they're kids, but if they're adults with children of their own, they lose that special position of needing mom and dad to think of them first.  And David, much as I despise him and much as I believe he took in his son for the rent money, was there when his son was shot.  I don't know what Ashley expects her father to do to show he puts his kids first--leave his wife?  I understand that Ashley is angry that her father deserted his family to go whoop it up in Thailand, but I have to wonder where her mother was--her mother now lives in TX, right?  Well, her mother is missing out on seeing her grandchildren grow up, too.  Is her mother a significant person in her life?

[OrchidThief]

10 minutes ago, Mothra said:

I don't know what Ashley expects her father to do to show he puts his kids first--leave his wife? 

I'm wondering if Ashley herself puts her kids first...it seems like she's putting Humpty Dumpster first.

[Mothra]

13 hours ago, DVDFreaker said:

Since Annie and David had sex 5 times a week, I am surprised Annie is not pregnant yet

Annie's got that professional-strength birth control.  She probably had sex more than five times a week at her job in Thailand, and I bet she knows how to avoid pregnancy better than most because her livelihood depended on it.

[CoachWristletJen]

4 minutes ago, lucy711 said:

I notice there isn't a lot of talk about Jorge and Anfisa.  Is everyone else as tired as them as I am?  Anfisa needs to just let him go forever.  If she is working and/or in school she will meet more interesting people to befriend or to date.  I can't imagine spending ten minutes with that pathetic man!

I was trying to figure out what it was about Jorge that makes him so disgusting. In addition to being a broke lying liar, the main thing is that he continues to see her as an object. He's got this perpetual leer on his dopey face that says, "When are we gonna have sex again?" And his face is literally dopey. I'm betting he smokes like a chimney and Anfisa gets disgusted with having this gigantic stoned goon hanging around her little apartment. I'm sure the only reason she's doing it is because she knows he'll try to hurt her if she doesn't take him back, hurt her through deportation. We've seen Jorge looking pretty torn up on camera and I'm sure that's part of what bothers her and yet she's never given him up. So she does understand something about loyalty (or codependent secret keeping, take your pick).  

At any rate, I'm delighted that she's in school and look forward to the day when she doesn't have to ever lay eyes on his leering groping ass again. He doesn't have the capacity to see her as anything beyond a sex object, or rather, doesn't want to do so. He couldn't remember a thing the therapist told them although that could be attributed to an advanced state of pot brain. 

[islandgal140]

Family Chantal/Pedro vacation is essentially the horror movie Cabin in the Woods. They should've started smaller like just going out to dinner at Olive Garden instead of going for a 5 day holiday together. Nothing good has or will come of it. 

Yeah, Nicole ain't shit but Nicole's family failed her! My jaw was hanging off its hinges when her mom agreed to pay up to $2k for her wedding dress. That dress is gonna get her ass arrested in Morocco. 

That $2k should go towards Nicole learning some kind of trade to get her and her daughter out of abject poverty! 

When did Anfisa and Jorge get so damn boring?!?! It is the same shit every episode. When Pao and Russ are bringing it over you, we got a problem. I'm convinced that if is wasn't for the TLC cameras Anfisa would be gone. Her greatest aspiration is to be a Kardashian after all. It is this show that allows her to stunt on the gram! 

Jorge is mentally slower than a snail on crutches. 

Pao, her family and friends act like Pao running off to marry Russ of her own accord and live in the US was something that was done to her (like kidnapping and enslavement) and Pao sits there and agrees. Talking about, Russ needs to be forgiven for the stuff he did in the past. What the hell has Russ done that requires forgiveness? Being stupid enough to marry her self-absorbed ass?  I firmly believe that Pao had been talking major shit about Russ to Juan and that is why he feels emboldened enough to come out of pocket like he does. 

Pao is using Juan for drama.  Russ and Juan's dislike of each other is well established. There is really no need for Russ and Juan to ever meet again. They live on 2 different continents. Pao doesn't go to Colombia often (once in 4 years) and Juan comes to the states once/twice a year, if that.  Pao and Juan's relationships consist mainly probably of emails and skypping. 

If Juan found himself an American sugar daddy to whisk him away and get him a visa, he would be paying Pao dust and laughing about it. He is that bitch!  

Molly you should've left that no account manchild in unclaimed baggage at the airport. She really does need a brick building to fall on her if she is just NOW realizing Luis doesn't want no parts of step daddy duty. 

[CoachWristletJen]

David is a lowlife to be charging his high school aged son rent when he still owes for back child support!

I felt like he had no real interest in a relationship with his daughter because it was just too dang hard for him overcoming all of his past mistakes. He'd rather be with someone with whom he had no past. (Although he did perk up when Snooki mentioned his dick. Not often for him that people talk about it.)

[Mothra]

16 hours ago, guilfoyleatpp said:

I would LOVE to know what Nicole's stepdad thinks "a Muslim wedding" looks like. He keeps saying it like it's some sort of 3 day slog with multiple costume changes and no air conditioning. I'm sure it's something he's heard described on Alex Jones. I just want to know. 

Nicole did say that the wedding involved three dresses, two of them "Moroccan," which we've yet to see, and one Western.  I imagine the two Moroccan dresses will be tents.  No, I really mean *tents*.

ETA Make that *seven* dresses.  Seven.  Paging Omar the Tentmaker.

Edited June 11, 2018 by Mothra
It's important to know how many dresses Nicole needs

[islandgal140]

2 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Spoiler:  He wasn't.

I read this in Ron Howard's Arrested Development narrator voice. 

[Mothra]

9 hours ago, LadyKenobi said:

I'm going to Australia in a couple months and obviously it's highly Westernized, but I'm still researching differences in culture that might result in accidental offense.

Hint:  Don't mention that you "root for" your favorite team.  Trust me.

[OrchidThief]

Next question...where on earth does one find a wedding-gown store stocking floor samples that size? REI? Apparently I've never been married (long and ludicrous story), but I've been in two wedding dresses. The first was for a humorous PR shoot in Poughkeepsie, and they stocked up to what seemed like a 12 (and Poughkeepsie ain't glamorous, but that was still the biggest) and I bought a size 6 -- that was cut more like a size 2, which I'm not anymore -- at a Monique L'huillier sample sale.

Molly, Molly, Molly. I'm a native southerner, and that put-on, little-girly version of a southern accent makes my breakfast come back up. You don't have to put that act on to make people think you're stupid...we already caught on. How does she run a business? And what kind of lingerie business trip is in...KENTUCKY? Most textile mills are in states a bit farther south, in cotton country, and I'm not sure Kentucky is a thriving fashion center. Maybe there's a thong convention?

I'm kinda liking Anfisa. She took the bull by the horns and has adapted very well to the US. Her language skills are terrific. Seemed the shrink caught on quickly to the real story, too.

The Pao and Russ thing...thank goodness she wasn't preggers. The longer he stays with her, the farther his engineering cuh-REAR slips away. She is way more trouble than she's worth. He's truly looking like a moron. And now it feels like they've been in Colombia for an eternity. Isn't it time to return to Miami? And the red hair. It's far more difficult for redheads to book modeling/acting gigs than blondes/brunettes. A friend of mine landed a role back in the day on Falcon Crest, and that was a miracle as redheads are often overlooked.

[Mothra]

7 hours ago, Kangatush said:

 I would feel too naked and like I'd need to be hoisting it up all night.

That's the other thing--did you see how attractive it looked, with her elbows cocked out, as she tugged at the top of that dress?  Such a good, feminine look for your wedding day.  And you know she'll be doing it all day long.  UGH.