Josiah and Lauren: He Has To Marry Somebody

[Pingaponga]

My guess is that she is pregnant, but not ready to publicly announce it.  If the dress is currently available for sale, then odds are slim-to-none that she would have been able to purchase it when she was pregnant in the Fall - it's not a "Fall dress" in colour or style. I don't know anything about Arkansas, but where I live the Fall clothes are replaced by Winter clothes, which are now replaced by Spring/Summer clothes. There's no way you could find something in a store now that was also for sale in October/November.

When I was four weeks pregnant I no longer fit properly into my regular clothes. I bloated right away, and at six weeks I went shopping for pants two sizes larger than my regular size. At three months, when I went public with my pregnancy, those two-sizes-too-big pants could only be done up with an elastic band. I wore maternity clothes when I went in to work and announced my pregnancy at 3 months along. Two weeks earlier my company had had their annual Christmas party, and I bailed from it as I couldn't fit into any non-maternity clothes without looking really oddly shaped, and I wasn't ready to wear a maternity dress and start rumours swirling.

Lauren may just be someone who shows early, and she wanted something nice to wear for Easter Sunday - so she bought a dress that she could wear through the summer. Unfortunately for her, she had no idea that people would track down the store where she bought the dress and discover that it is a maternity dress. And she's probably terrified of announcing too soon and miscarrying. Announcing early and miscarrying are in no way related, but people are awfully nervous about jinxing themselves.

[DangerousMinds]

Another major homeschooling failure.

[jcbrown]

Just now, DangerousMinds said:

Another major homeschooling failure.

Holy cow. "...how loved and special you're"?! Morons. Absolute morons.

[Churchhoney]

4 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

This was a cute Easter outfit! I would’ve cut the skirt to just below the knee and the sleeves to just below the elbow, but this is fashionable, occasion appropriate while still youthful. How in one year did she go from THIS to that yellow swim coverup with a man’s undershirt underneath??!

 

It's the Duggar virus. 

Next year the dress will be in mustard. 

Edited April 28, 2019 by Churchhoney

[Jynnan tonnix]

52 minutes ago, jcbrown said:

Holy cow. "...how loved and special you're"?! Morons. Absolute morons.

Well, it IS a contraction for "you are"...just that it's never used in that particular format. I'm not good with the  rules of sentence structure - since I didn't generally have much trouble actually using the language, I had no interest in all the whys and wherefores and they pretty much went in one ear/eye and out of the other. But is there an actual rule which says it cannot be used the way she did? Other than sounding all sorts of awkward?

[Churchhoney]

16 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Well, it IS a contraction for "you are"...just that it's never used in that particular format. I'm not good with the  rules of sentence structure - since I didn't generally have much trouble actually using the language, I had no interest in all the whys and wherefores and they pretty much went in one ear/eye and out of the other. But is there an actual rule which says it cannot be used the way she did? Other than sounding all sorts of awkward?

It's grammatically incorrect.

"You're" or "it's" or "I'm" can only be used when the "are" or "is" or "am" is a lesser part of the sentence, like a helping verb or a verb that's linking a subject and the predicate nominative (a noun or pronoun that means the same as the subject) or a predicate adjective (an adjective that follows the verb but describes the subject).

In those cases, the "are" or "is" or "am" is unstressed when you speak the sentence. So you can express it as a contraction. You can't express it as a contraction when it's a stressed word in the sentence. 

For example, -- You can say "You're nuts!" (predicate adjective). Or "It's Susie!" (predicate nominative) or "I'm hungry!" (predicate adjective).

But if somebody asks, "Who's the sucker here?" you have to answer "You are." Not "you're." Because the "are" is part of the vital meaning of the sentence. It's not just linking two other things that are the real meat of the sentence. 

Similarly, if you say, "It's a lovely day!" Someone would answer "It is"  not "it's" because  in the meaning of that sentence, the "is" is a key part of the sentence and it's stressed in speech. 

You may remember (or not!) that this is made into a mild joke rhyme in the Gershwin song "Bidin' My Time." 

"I'm bidin' my time

"Cause that's the kind of guy I'm." 

Incorrect as grammar -- so it works as a joky rhyme. 

Edited April 28, 2019 by Churchhoney

[Jynnan tonnix]

1 minute ago, Churchhoney said:

It's grammatically incorrect.

"You're" or "it's" or "I'm" can only be used when there the "are" or "is" or "am" is a lesser part of the sentence, like a helping verb or a verb that's linking a subject and the predicate nominative (a noun or pronoun that means the same as the subject) or a predicate adjective (an adjective that follows the verb but describes the subject).

In those cases, the "are" or "is" or "am" is unstressed when you speak the sentence. So you can express it as a contraction. You can't express it as a contraction when it's a stressed word in the sentence. 

For example, -- You can say "You're nuts!" (predicate adjective). Or "It's Susie!" (predicate nominative" or "I'm hungry!" (predicate adjective).

But if somebody asks, "Who's the sucker here?" you have to answer "You are." Not "you're." Because the "are" is part of the vital meaning of the sentence. It's not just linking two other things that are the real meat of the sentence. 

Similarly, if you say, "It's a lovely day!" Someone would answer "It is"  not "it's" because  in the meaning of that sentence, the "is" is a key part of the sentence and it's stressed in speech. 

You may remember (or not!) that this is made into a mild joke rhyme in the Gershwin song "Bidin' My Time." 

"I'm bidin' my time. 

"Cause that's the kind of guy I'm." 

Incorrect as grammar -- so it works as a joky rhyme. 

Thanks. It's still all going to go right through my brain as though it was a sieve, but I do appreciate the effort. Things like "predicate nominative" might as well be Greek for all the sense I can make of them. All I know is that the examples you gave sound right when used correctly and all sorts of wonky otherwise. But it's nice to know that there is a reason for it 🙂

[Churchhoney]

28 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Thanks. It's still all going to go right through my brain as though it was a sieve, but I do appreciate the effort. Things like "predicate nominative" might as well be Greek for all the sense I can make of them. All I know is that the examples you gave sound right when used correctly and all sorts of wonky otherwise. But it's nice to know that there is a reason for it 🙂

You're welcome. As you can probably tell, I love grammar. I'm always just waiting for an excuse to talk about it. (.... and I call other people nuts!)    😀

[jcbrown]

I should add that I recognize that Lauren's post might have gotten f'ed up due to autocorrect (shouldn't AI be able to learn the rules of grammar? OT) but it's still literally her ONLY job to gin up interest in the family and collaterally the show with her posts so it is therefore incumbent upon her to f$%ing proofread. (And yes, I realize that was a run-on sentence.)

[DangerousMinds]

7 minutes ago, jcbrown said:

I should add that I recognize that Lauren's post might have gotten f'ed up due to autocorrect (shouldn't AI be able to learn the rules of grammar? OT) but it's still literally her ONLY job to gin up interest in the family and collaterally the show with her posts so it is therefore incumbent upon her to f$%ing proofread. (And yes, I realize that was a run-on sentence.)

Autocorrect maybe, but there is no excuse for not proofreading.

[jcbrown]

1 minute ago, DangerousMinds said:

Autocorrect maybe, but there is no excuse for not proofreading.

Exactly.

[Barb23]

16 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Another major homeschooling failure.

I feel like I am back in school & given an assignment to correct what is wrong in poorly written sentences (including misspelling) when I read anything a Duggar posts.

[Heathen]

12 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

Autocorrect maybe, but there is no excuse for not proofreading.

People blame autocorrect for their own mistakes. I've been using smart phones for years, and I have yet to have one autocorrect to any of the ridiculous things people blame on autocorrect. 

Topic: Pretty flowers. They make me sneeze just looking at them. 

[Oldernowiser]

Are hydrangeas considered cut flowers now? I’ve only seen them sold as plants, but it’s not like it comes up much. I shop in nurseries not florists.

[doodlebug]

1 hour ago, Oldernowiser said:

Are hydrangeas considered cut flowers now? I’ve only seen them sold as plants, but it’s not like it comes up much. I shop in nurseries not florists.

Yes, you can find them cut in arrangements, however, their stems are kinda woody and they don't take up water very well so they tend not to last more than a few days.

[Barb23]

7 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Are hydrangeas considered cut flowers now? I’ve only seen them sold as plants, but it’s not like it comes up much. I shop in nurseries not florists.

6 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Yes, you can find them cut in arrangements, however, their stems are kinda woody and they don't take up water very well so they tend not to last more than a few days.

The flowers grow from bushes which can grow rather large if not trimmed.  There are pink, purple/blue & white flower  varieties.  We have the white variety in our backyard hiding the underneath of our deck. Hard to believe they grew from 2 little Dixie cup plants I got from mail order. The bushes are hardy.  For the most part,  ours bloom around the 4th of July here in Maryland. I have made many a huge centerpiece of our white ones along with pink & blue ones from my mom's bushes for 4th of July parties.  They do drink plenty of water & shed quickly. They have become one of my favorites too, along with lilacs. 

ETA:  They also look beautiful in my dad's & father-in-law's vases on their graves. 

[Christina87]

9 hours ago, Barb23 said:

I feel like I am back in school & given an assignment to correct what is wrong in poorly written sentences (including misspelling) when I read anything a Duggar posts.

I taught English for a year, and I used to take social media posts and cover up the names and pictures for their "warm up," to make it seem more real world. They were supposed to write the post using correct grammar and spelling, and it was lots of fun for a while! Eventually they got to the point where they figured out how to move the black bars, and see the names. They'd hatefully say, "I'm gonna send XYZ a message and tell her you're using her posts in class!" It alarmed me how much venom they had for me when I was just trying to make things fun. I'm pretty sure they never actually contacted anyone, though. Obviously I stopped, and then they complained that they never got to do anything fun anymore. Well? What did you expect? Sometimes a few jerks ruin it for everybody. 

Edited April 29, 2019 by Christina87

[Madtown]

Si looks terrified and so uncomfortable in every picture these two take.

[FizzyPuff]

On 4/28/2019 at 1:07 AM, DangerousMinds said:

Another major homeschooling failure.

Not trying to sound morbid but I thought those flowers were on top a coffin 😬

[FizzyPuff]

4 hours ago, Madtown said:

Si looks terrified and so uncomfortable in every picture these two take.

I thought the same when he was with Majorie (was that her name?) he looked scared of her. All I saw on YouTube were comments about how sweet they looked together and I thought can No one tell that boy looks frightened. I thought I was loosing my mind tbh. 

[Christina87]

1 hour ago, Puffin said:

I thought the same when he was with Majorie (was that her name?) he looked scared of her. All I saw on YouTube were comments about how sweet they looked together and I thought can No one tell that boy looks frightened. I thought I was loosing my mind tbh. 

I agree, and as a woman, there's no feeling more uncomfortable than a man who feels antsy around you (not intimidated yet interested...just scared). There was this guy in my college choir that I swear acted like I was going to assault him every time I even spoke to him. We stood near each other, and I made friendly conversation with him, but he acted terrified and wary of me. I would replay my actions over and over, and never could figure out anything I was doing wrong. I acted just the same around lots of people, and no one else took it the wrong way. I tried to discern if I was doing anything overtly forward, or like a come-on, but I really couldn't think of anything. I always felt insecure around this guy after several failed interactions, like he thought I was a scary loser, and I hated the feeling. 

Years later, I saw on Facebook that he married a woman who was objectively less attractive than me, and it made me feel a little better. Even IF I had been aggressively interested in him, it shouldn't have insulted him. But nothing I did should have been perceived that way...it was friendly small talk!

if lauren is living with this feeling every day, I feel really, really sorry for her. 

ETA: dude's wife wore an Anna Duggar style t-shirt dress for their wedding. Maybe he is secretly a Gothardite, scared of worldly college hussies!

Edited April 30, 2019 by Christina87

[Snow Fairy]

She looks happier in the solo pictures than with Josiah

[Westiepeach]

5 minutes ago, Snow Fairy said:

She looks happier in the solo pictures than with Josiah

She definitely looks more relaxed. And therefore, happier. 

[Snow Fairy]

Or pregnancy glow?

The dress is ideal for pregnancy rumors

[Temperance]

9 minutes ago, Snow Fairy said:

Or pregnancy glow?

The dress is ideal for pregnancy rumors

All of the Bates Sisters' Boutique are loose and flowy. Many of the dresses including this one are officially designated "Maternity Friendly". 

Edited May 10, 2019 by Temperance

[galaxychaser]

That’s a pretty dress! She is free of Si jazz hands!

[lizzie3]

I actually really like that dress!  It looks like it would be flattering on many body types.  She looks great. 

[Sew Sumi]

Sorry, UO here, but I am not a fan of big floral prints on anyone. The best I can do is admit to a couple of nightshirts with a dainty floral motif. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing floral in public. Solids, baby! I've been in the big bad city too long! 😁

Edited May 11, 2019 by Sew Sumi

[Minivanessa]

Like @Sew Sumi, I'm not a fan of florals. But IMO that's a nice dress. It fits her well and has a little style to it. It isn't cut like a potato sack or droopy from being worn to bits. It's perfectly modest and as noted, cut to accommodate* a baby bump should one appear.

IOW, it's totally un-Duggar. 

*Ahem, note that I said "accommodate" a baby bump. Not "hug the bump so tightly you can see the wearer's navel from ten paces away." Looking at you Jessa Blessa.

Edited May 11, 2019 by Jeeves
#*@(%^&! Autocorrect.

[Sew Sumi]

To be fair, Jessa only really flaunted her first pregnancy. She was pretty downlow with Henry and has only had maybe two bump pics with this one. 

Edited May 11, 2019 by Sew Sumi

[Zella]

Jessa is infuriating, but I think she is a little more capable of learning than some of the others. She'll certainly be really defensive about stuff on the surface, but it's like she makes a mental note not to do certain things again. Maybe the backlash for how over-the-top she was about it has sunk in? 

[Temperance]

Lauren's birthday is sometime around now; any birthday announcements?

[Lunera]

OMG just stop! Lauren was never a mother! They are doing entirely too much. Are they celebrating the fetus's bday too? I don't remember seeing a stocking for their "sweet baby" during Xmas. If she has more miscarriages will they treat "it" as special as the fist. 

[BigBingerBro]

wow, just wow

[madpsych78]

6 minutes ago, Lunera said:

OMG just stop! Lauren was never a mother! They are doing entirely too much. Are they celebrating the fetus's bday too? I don't remember seeing a stocking for their "sweet baby" during Xmas. If she has more miscarriages will they treat "it" as special as the fist. 

I see they changed their Instagram handle into a joint Instagram. Not surprised that the couples who are more Gothard-entrenched have a joint IG account, although surprised that Josh and Anna did not (even before the scandals).

[fonfereksglen]

9 minutes ago, Lunera said:

OMG just stop! Lauren was never a mother! They are doing entirely too much. Are they celebrating the fetus's bday too? I don't remember seeing a stocking for their "sweet baby" during Xmas. If she has more miscarriages will they treat "it" as special as the fist. 

Tragic.

[xwordfanatik]

Sorry.  I hate it when a heavy period the day after pissing on a stick qualifies one as "a mother."  YMMV.

Good question about what they'll say about a possible second miscarriage.  My MIL had five miscarriages, four live births, and the only one that she considered a true miscarriage was miscarried during her second trimester (German Measles.)  She stated to me that the other MC's were like heavy periods.

Lauren is a true drama queen.  Josiah's just feeding into it.  Ugh.

[woodscommaelle]

On 4/27/2019 at 9:58 AM, Barb23 said:

disregard quote box

That yellow dress is like Anthropologie for the Fundy crowd.

[3 is enough]

FFS! They need to get over themselves already.  You'd think they were the only people on the planet who ever had an early miscarriage.  Or that after years and years of trying, they FINALLY were able to conceive and then lost the baby.  

I felt sorry for them when the news came out.  But this pity party has to end now. 

If they really want to conceive again, maybe Josiah should switch to some looser pants.  Just saying...

Edited May 13, 2019 by 3 is enough

[Churchhoney]

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

Lauren is a true drama queen.  Josiah's just feeding into it.  Ugh.

I feel sorry for  him, actually.

He's not into this whole thing. But he got into it because he's convinced that he has to try to be into it and probably also because, like the rest of them, he doesn't know where else to go or what to do. ....

And if he left even to do something innocuous, I'd bet somewhere in the back of his mind is the fear that "what if I turned out gay"' -- or something on that order. ... 

So here he is trapped in this marriage. I'm sure he didn't want it, inside. And she seems to have gone into it because she and her father want to ride the Duggars' fame train. I'm sure it wasn't out of any attraction to or affection for Josiah.....

So now he's got a major drama queen. And he's trying to participate. And since she's made so much of this, it's quite likely the only thing he has to grab onto in the situation that he thinks will please everybody is to join in her supposed mourning for the heavy period. I'll bet he sees no alternative to doing that to make everybody happy....or as happy as can be, when I'm sure they're all casting a jaundiced and suspicious eye on him all the time .... 

I doubt he knows which way to turn. They've both married into a big lie. And I expect he did entirely out of fear and Stockholm syndrome. 

And she did it as a famewhore -- but she's also practically still a kid and the child of a famewhore....so while I feel less sorry for her than I do for him I do feel kind of sorry for her, too. And the whole situation makes me nauseated. 

It's a tragic mess. And all they can figure out to do is make it more of a depressing drama. Awful. 

Edited May 13, 2019 by Churchhoney

[yogi2014L]

1 hour ago, xwordfanatik said:

Sorry.  I hate it when a heavy period the day after pissing on a stick qualifies one as "a mother."  YMMV.

Good question about what they'll say about a possible second miscarriage.  My MIL had five miscarriages, four live births, and the only one that she considered a true miscarriage was miscarried during her second trimester (German Measles.)  She stated to me that the other MC's were like heavy periods.

Lauren is a true drama queen.  Josiah's just feeding into it.  Ugh.

Yeah this is just too much. It would be in far better taste to post something like, " Thinking of anyone who have had a miscarriage ect" Not happy first mothers day, our baby is in heaven ect. They may be too dense to even realize what kind of comparison they are making.

I wonder if/when she has a full term birth she will still consider her super early miscarriage as traumatizing as losing a baby? She needs perspective.

[jcbrown]

7 minutes ago, yogi2014L said:

I wonder if/when she has a full term birth she will still consider her super early miscarriage as traumatizing as losing a baby? She needs perspective.

I completely agree. Like @Churchhoney, though, I feel a little sorry for them. She has been raised to think that her only value lies in the creation of babies for Jesus. I imagine they are a bit disoriented.

But yes, they are also super-annoying and tone-deaf.

[Gweilo]

If Lauren's not a mother, she's a nothing in the eyes of Josiah's family. He could be trying (misguidedly) to stand up for her.

[Churchhoney]

32 minutes ago, jcbrown said:

I completely agree. Like @Churchhoney, though, I feel a little sorry for them. She has been raised to think that her only value lies in the creation of babies for Jesus. I imagine they are a bit disoriented.

But yes, they are also super-annoying and tone-deaf.

Of course they've been raised to be that, too.

JB and M? Dwayne Swanson? Virtually everybody in Gothard-world? -- super-annoying and tone-deaf to the max.

And Josiah, certainly, has been utterly isolated among these people -- and, most likely, uneasy with aspects of his own identity at the same time......

So in that position, you're either going to be the kind of person who freaks out, throws caution to the winds, and runs -- just to get anywhere, somewhere, where life is different......But I really think that most people aren't cut out to be runners of that kind...even when the running's a good idea, in many cases....

Or you're going to be somebody who;s afraid and stays in the home territory. And, one way or another, takes on the characteristics of the "role models" who are all around you...... Whether it's as camouflage or just because you're uncomfortable with yourself and don't know anything else to model yourself on -- and those people are the most acceptable in your world....

And since the Swansons are massive Gothardites I assume been Lauren's been pretty isolated in it, too..... And it seems she probably drank all the Kool-Aid. So she'll deliberately model herself on these people. .... On......saintly Mothers of the Year like Meeechelle, for example. And on all these people who just go nuts over producing spermfruit. It's the only thing they think about -- and they're tone deaf and annoying as hell....And act like Jubilee was nearly full term....and bury her in an ammo box....and so on...

Under the circumstances, it's hard for me to imagine these two being anything but tone-deaf and super-annoying in the JB/M/Gothardite way..... Either that. Or runaways and apostates. But they've stayed. 

Edited May 13, 2019 by Churchhoney

[scriggle]

The question is, come June, will Josiah get a father's day post from Lauren? He should going by their logic. But I bet he won't.

[Oldernowiser]

Okay, here’s the thing. I have a soft spot for Josiah because I think he’s a gay man trapped in a nightmare he can’t leave. So my Duggar Dial isn’t automatically cranked all the way to “despise” where he’s concerned.

Given the kind of relentless brainwashing they’ve both had, this is actually very sweet. He’s trying to comfort her. Not even a cold-hearted uber cynic like me can hate on that, regardless of how whackadoodle the beliefs behind it are.

[Barb23]

Once again we ask the question why did he need to put this private message on social media? He could have written a generic Happy Mother's Day wish to all mothers or to Mechelle & Lauren's mother & kept this message between just him & Lauren. 

[JoanArc]

8 hours ago, scriggle said:

The question is, come June, will Josiah get a father's day post from Lauren? He should going by their logic. But I bet he won't.

Framed picture of Lauren holding her belly and frowning.

[NotthebadVictoria]

6 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

Framed picture of Lauren holding her belly and frowning.

Laughed so hard I spit coffee

[Churchhoney]

8 hours ago, Barb23 said:

Once again we ask the question why did he need to put this private message on social media? He could have written a generic Happy Mother's Day wish to all mothers or to Mechelle & Lauren's mother & kept this message between just him & Lauren. 

Well, the Duggarlngs were relentlessly taught from a young age -- when their creepy parents put their young children on reality tv for money and to be "Christian role models" (gag -- not gagging at the idea of CRMs, but at the idea that Jim Bob and Meeeechelle could ever, by any stretch of the imagination, be such a thing...)  -- that your life is supposed to be arranged and displayed for public consumption.

And their damn parents continue to model this endlessly. 

It drives me insane. But I don't think we can blame the kids for it.

They've been deliberately isolated in JB's and M's world. And in that world you put ALL interpersonal messages into the media. And, in fact, you write them TO the public, not to the person in question. Hence, Josiah's asshole parents sometimes signing birthday "notes" to their own children "Mom and Dad Duggar." 

First off, they don't even know other people. So how would they know that a lot of other people don't do this? (although today a lot do -- because they model themselves on media "celebrities" too). And, of course, at the Duggar house your life has always been a performance for not just fans, but the people who are supposed to be following your example to a holy life! The people who "love," "admire" and "look up to" these people.  And I'm sure their "duties" to those people have been repeatedly banged into their heads by their hideous, disgusting, loathsome mother and father. 

And in Josiah's case, of course, the poor guy has something (a lot, probably) to prove. And he's not proving it to Lauren (solely or even primarily). He's got to be out there proving it to his no doubt very skeptical family -- especially his monstrous, petty parents -- and all of Gothard world. So he has an extra reason to do this stupid posting. 

Since it was basically a public announcement to justify himself, there's no way it wasn't going to go on social media. 

Edited May 13, 2019 by Churchhoney