Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Patricia07]

I also think that Jill was very unhappy with the way Izzie's birth played out.  She may consider it his fault because he wasn't in the correct position.  It will be interesting to see how she treats this baby if everything goes according to her birth plan.

[IntoTheMystic]

13 minutes ago, sheshark said:

Joy's.

I just watched it and didn't see it. I miss everything, man. Ah ... nevermind. I only watched the actual wedding. Not the pre-wedding episode. Watching now. 

Edited June 15, 2017 by IntoTheMystic
Found the correct video.

[toodles]

14 hours ago, Christina87 said:

It's just like when women get married, chop their hair off the next day, and intentionally gain 50 pounds (not talking about suddenly getting sick or something). I think Derick having an accountant degree that he uses for a day is the male equivalent of that false advertising! He definitely is not the mate that he advertised!

I doubt the duggars gave 2 shits if Derrick was an accountant or not.  Silly Jilly didn't like him going to a job anyway.  

All that mattered to them is:  1). Can you reproduce and have an army of children.  Liking children is not mandatory. 2). Can you post self righteous bible verses and piss everyone off.  3). Can you put up with an empty headed stage 5 clinger for the rest of your life.  4). Are you a famewhoring doormat who will do whatever you're told.

Check yes on all of the above for Derrick Dillard.  The perfect duggar husband.

[andromeda331]

1 hour ago, lulu69 said:

I think Jill expected the same attention  and adoration MEchelle got when she was pregnant. What Jill failed to realize is that the attention/adoration didn't come from MEchelle's own siblings. It came from MEchelle's children and not until she pumped out at least 6-8 kids.

Also, MEchelle had to raise her own kids for the first few years until the sister moms were ready. Jill acts like she should  be able to have a kid, then dump him/her off on everyone else just like mom did. 

I think this was exactly what Jill was expecting. All of the attention and none of the work just like Mom Michelle.

[Pinke]

58 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

And you know by "Mom" they really meant "Jana." It scares me in a way, because we're seeing a lot of Michelle-like traits coming out in Jill. My worst fear is that Izzy will become her scapegoat much like Jana was for Michelle. Anytime she's with that kid you can feel the resentment oozing out of her pores. Derick doesn't seen to be too thrilled with him either, so it makes me worry.

Yes!! It's really disturbing.

Granted, this is ''reality'' tv and we are only shown a version of this reality, but I find it telling that a lot of us have picked up on this vibe. There has been several scenes involving those assholes the Dillards where you can sense things are off. They may try as hard as they want to ''hide'' it (I say hide, but I don't think they are self-aware enough to be thinking this way), but cracks are showing nevertheless.

Of course, there's editing to take into consideration, and I am not saying all is fine and dandy in regard to the other couples. Nevertheless, you work with the material you get (whether real or staged), and I get the sense that what we see with the Dillards is not far from the reality - a small, toned down portion of the reality, but reality nonetheless.

 

 

TLDR; some people shouldn't be allowed to breed.

[Christina87]

I kind of wonder if Jill sees the entire thing as a huge mistake. Maybe she feels like she's sleeping next to an adversary / stranger at night, and wishes she didn't have a child. I see her abandoning Izzy under the clothing rack as her wishing / pretending she was like the sisters who don't have children. I don't think she was honestly ready for a change in life when she got married. She had it made as JB's favorite, perfect daughter, in a home where her buddy team worshipped her. mentally, I don't think she's at all ready to move on, even now. 

She reminds me of my teenage self, who got handed someone's baby at thanksgiving, and then desperately needed to dump him on somebody so I could go to CVS with the other teen girls and look at makeup, feeling almost resentful to be holding it. Not good that Jill seems to feel this way at 26, with her own child!

[DangerousMinds]

13 hours ago, cmr2014 said:

I have mixed feelings about this. There are definitely two possibilities here.

1. Derick wanted to be an accountant, settle down and provide for his family and move on to missionary work when he had achieved his educational goals. He got sucked into the Duggar vortex and thought that SOS would be a way out -- not exactly what he had planned/hoped for, but something . . .

2. Derick is a slacker. He liked drifting around in Nepal on someone else's dime and believed that he was actually, somehow, doing the "Lord's work." He got an accounting degree because his mother insisted that he finish school, and worked at WalMart because she got him the job and made him promise to give it at least a year. He's more than happy to loll around in idleness in the Duggar compound in between ":missionary" gigs for SOS.

I drift back and forth in my opinion on Derick. He's not a particularly admirable guy, or a guy of strong character, but I'm not 100% convinced that scenario #2 is true.

I think Jill misrepresented herself too. I think Derick believed she truly wanted to work as a midwife, at least part time. However, people change throughout the course of their lives, especially when still young. You can't expect your spouse to stay the "same" person you married if you marry so early, IMO.

[bigskygirl]

Jill pretends to be a midwife. She does not have the skills, education and people skills to be one. I would not trust her to take care of my medical needs period. I could get better treatment if I was to lay down on the floor and have one or both my cats do a cat scan.

[awaken]

1 hour ago, sheshark said:

I

The trampoline-spaz episode and filthy feet are in the 2 hour wedding show.  Josie crapping herself is from two or three years ago.

I see I have a lot to look forward to!  I haven't had enough alone time yet to secretly watch the show.  

2 hours ago, sometimesy said:

I love how the Dullards come home from their faux mission grifting vacation and land in the pool house with easily accessible childcare and maid service. 

The way she just ditched Izzy under the clothing rack was abominable. We'll just leave him with Mom. She doesn't even acknowledge who was taking care of him. 

This really pisses me off, as someone who's paid their own way in life since age 14, worked my butt off through school and grad school and paid for it all myself, and has raised my own kids (AND COOK and take care of my own house, learned on my own!!!) with no financial or hands-on help from any family members.  I mean, sure, some help and support from family is wonderful, and I would have loved to have had it.  An entire lifestyle that is based on not achieving anything, not working, not becoming educated, not even caring for your own kids or knowing how to cook or clean when that is ALL you have to do, and expecting your parents to pay for it and the general public to donate to enable your lifestyle when you're a celebrity on teevee and in magazines just makes me MAD! 

11 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

I kind of wonder if Jill sees the entire thing as a huge mistake. Maybe she feels like she's sleeping next to an adversary / stranger at night, and wishes she didn't have a child. I see her abandoning Izzy under the clothing rack as her wishing / pretending she was like the sisters who don't have children. I don't think she was honestly ready for a change in life when she got married. She had it made as JB's favorite, perfect daughter, in a home where her buddy team worshipped her. mentally, I don't think she's at all ready to move on, even now. 

She reminds me of my teenage self, who got handed someone's baby at thanksgiving, and then desperately needed to dump him on somebody so I could go to CVS with the other teen girls and look at makeup, feeling almost resentful to be holding it. Not good that Jill seems to feel this way at 26, with her own child!

I agree with you.  How incredibly sad that this is her only lot in life, the only path her life was "allowed" to take, even if she wasn't ready for it and didn't necessarily want it.  I'm sure she loves the idea of being pregnant and having babies, and the status it brings in her circle, but actually taking care of children and raising them day in and day out is much different that the "fun" and anticipation of pregnancy.  

[Mrs. P.]

18 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

I think Jill misrepresented herself too. I think Derick believed she truly wanted to work as a midwife, at least part time. However, people change throughout the course of their lives, especially when still young. You can't expect your spouse to stay the "same" person you married if you marry so early, IMO.

Jill was also supposed to have a "heart" for missions when Derrick first met her. Now that's she's learned that the reality of mission work is very different from her romanticized idea, her heart seems to have turned cold. Since mission work appears to be the only thing Derrick has any interest in, I'm sure this change is very disheartening to him. That plus the fact that Jill was so poorly educated that they couldn't even qualify for mission support from their Church - Derrick has had a rude awakening.

[Christina87]

Derick also seems really petty, like, "if you don't have to work, well, I won't either!!!" My parents have a great marriage where my dad has a good job and my mom is a SAHM, but they decided TOGETHER that was the best plan for our family. I also agree that Jill misrepresented herself, and implied that she wanted to be a midwife, at least part time. His own mother was strong enough to work, raise two boys, struggle with her health, and do part of it as a single mother. Literally any one of these things would drive Jill to the madhouse!

i could see Derick agreeing in theory that Jill would be a mainly at-home parent, but s working mom is all he's ever known. He probably resented working a tough job while Jill lolled around at home, especially when her baby wasn't even here yet! He seems childish enough that one year of a real job would send him to the corner crying, and he doesn't see it as a team where he makes the money and Jill takes care of the child. Who knows if that's due to Jill not taking care of Izzy, or whether he would feel that way regardless. I very much get a needy-neeny-nah-nah vibe from him, where he childishly proclaims he's not working if she doesn't. He doesn't realize how much of an ass it makes him when she is physically recovering from a birth and breastfeeding, while he selfishly lopes around arksansas not wanting to support his family while they're home. Two words: temp. Agency!

[Churchhoney]

2 hours ago, sheshark said:

I

The trampoline-spaz episode and filthy feet are in the 2 hour wedding show.  Josie crapping herself is from two or three years ago.

Sounds like riveting television. 

[ariel]

3 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

I don't understand why they resent Izzy.

He's a healthy first born son, by their ideology he should be the favorite for many more years if not forever. It's not as if he's developed personality traits as an adult that they cannot stand, he's just a toddler!

I'm thinking they really don't like children & shouldn't have them.  For most of us that's ok & not a crime. For their cult it is. 

[WhineandCheez]

Quote

but I find it telling that a lot of us have picked up on this vibe

It's been oh-so-very vague and hard to pick up.  Not like Derrick posted on how MANIPULATIVE AND SINFUL his toddler child was for asking for a cookie while telling him he loved Daddy, or anything like that.  (shudders at Izzy's horrible human nature)

 

Quote

I could get better treatment if I was to lay down on the floor and have one or both my cats do a cat scan

Bigskygirl, don't forget to get one of your Retrievers to also submit a "LAB" Report.

Edited June 15, 2017 by WhineandCheez

[sometimesy]

5 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

Sounds like riveting television. 

TLC gave liberty to Dillard to look like a complete tool. He made a great foil for the other guys. It was kind of fascinating how much TLC is letting them hang themselves. 

 

1 minute ago, ariel said:

I'm thinking they really don't like children & shouldn't have them.  For most of us that's ok & not a crime. For their cult it is. 

Derick has this 'authoritarian' type of approach to raising Izzy. I think Derp has control and power issues and his entire life is about accommodating those issues. Weak wife, lording himself over people who are more economically unfortunate, and trying to control his toddler. These are the qualities that drew JB. I don't think he would ever intentionally really try to elevate anyone in anyway as it is not beneficial to him personally to do so. 

[Mya]

I think Derick is just nuts.  These two are a mess.

[MargeGunderson]

22 hours ago, Mollie said:

I discovered the reason for Derick's persistent vomiting.  It's because of the DONATE button.

“He swallows riches, But will vomit them up; God will expel them from his belly."  Job 20:15

I'm pretty sure Satan has built a fortress in Derick's stomach. 

[floridamom]

I still can't believe that Derelict had this vomiting issue since high school and didn't diagnose and treat this years ago. Doesn't make sense that this would go on that long. Is it me, or did Jill look like an idiot on that bicycle following behind vomiting Derick? She looked silly to me with a skirt over those leggings. Does she have to go absolutely everywhere with him?

BTW, Derick 'worked' one day as a substitute teacher. Such an opportunity to make some good money while he was in the USA....it was tax season and he could have prepared tax returns for a few months.,lazy guy.

[Whyyouneedaname]

3 hours ago, IntoTheMystic said:

I just watched it and didn't see it. I miss everything, man. Ah ... nevermind. I only watched the actual wedding. Not the pre-wedding episode. Watching now. 

it was actually the 2nd part of the episode, before the wedding, she & Austin were going out with the Seewalds & Dillards. If you notice when she's walking to the laundry/shoe room with one shoe on, her feet are NASTY. Just plain GROSS.

[BitterApple]

1 hour ago, ariel said:

I'm thinking they really don't like children & shouldn't have them.  For most of us that's ok & not a crime. For their cult it is. 

Exactly. I'm not a kid person so I don't have any. My husband has two grown daughters from his first marriage, so he's got parenting out of his system and he's fine with my decision. I can't imagine being in this cult where you're not expected to have just one or two kids, but nine or ten. I don't think most women are cut out for that, even if they do like children.

Edited June 15, 2017 by BitterApple

[bigskygirl]

2 hours ago, Christina87 said:

Derick also seems really petty, like, "if you don't have to work, well, I won't either!!!" My parents have a great marriage where my dad has a good job and my mom is a SAHM, but they decided TOGETHER that was the best plan for our family. I also agree that Jill misrepresented herself, and implied that she wanted to be a midwife, at least part time. His own mother was strong enough to work, raise two boys, struggle with her health, and do part of it as a single mother. Literally any one of these things would drive Jill to the madhouse!

i could see Derick agreeing in theory that Jill would be a mainly at-home parent, but s working mom is all he's ever known. He probably resented working a tough job while Jill lolled around at home, especially when her baby wasn't even here yet! He seems childish enough that one year of a real job would send him to the corner crying, and he doesn't see it as a team where he makes the money and Jill takes care of the child. Who knows if that's due to Jill not taking care of Izzy, or whether he would feel that way regardless. I very much get a needy-neeny-nah-nah vibe from him, where he childishly proclaims he's not working if she doesn't. He doesn't realize how much of an ass it makes him when she is physically recovering from a birth and breastfeeding, while he selfishly lopes around arksansas not wanting to support his family while they're home. Two words: temp. Agency!

I thought Derick was a freshman in college when his dad suddenly died, and I think his brother is older, so technically his mother was not a single mother trying to raise two boys on her own after his dad died since both boys were probably out of the house. She did work while the boys were growing up *heathen*

I would not be surprised if he was driven crazy by Jill constantly visiting him at work five days a week since she could not handle being on her own for five minutes. I do not think he resents working for at least one year since he wanted to go on a mission. I think he was definitely not ready for marriage and instant parenthood.

[JoanArc]

Quote

Derick has this 'authoritarian' type of approach to raising Izzy. I think Derp has control and power issues and his entire life is about accommodating those issues. Weak wife, lording himself over people who are more economically unfortunate, and trying to control his toddler. These are the qualities that drew JB. I don't think he would ever intentionally really try to elevate anyone in anyway as it is not beneficial to him personally to do so. 

Plus Derick is a complete coward and spaz, who only seemed successful on the periphery of the Adult world.

[dargosmydaddy]

48 minutes ago, bigskygirl said:

I thought Derick was a freshman in college when his dad suddenly died, and I think his brother is older,

I thought the brother is younger? (Not that this particularly negates your point, as he would have been in high school/ nearly "raised.")

[Whyyouneedaname]

as far as dating Jill, well courting since they don't date. I wasn't aware that courting led to engagement which led to marriage in such a short period of time. I wonder if he knew that was what was expected of him when he went into this relationship or did he get to far to back out. Not that he wouldn't have married but all that happened so quickly. Plus they have said that the engagements are short, only a couple of months. I dated my husband for 4 years before marriage, can't imagine having such a quick relationship to lead to marrying. 

[Sew Sumi]

3 minutes ago, dargosmydaddy said:

I thought the brother is younger? (Not that this particularly negates your point, as he would have been in high school/ nearly "raised.")

Right. Dan is two years younger than Derelict, so he would have been a junior in HS when Rick passed. So yeah, Cathy WAS a single, working mother for two years, even if all of her parenting work was pretty much done. 

[Annb67]

I think jilly muffin has been a little bat shit since she was young. Remember the wisdom teeth episode? I remember her clinging and crying into her dad like she was mental. She was a teenager. I get being scared but, as my momma would say, have some self control and stop acting like a fool. I can't imagine her having a c-section.

[Mollie]

16 minutes ago, Annb67 said:

I think jilly muffin has been a little bat shit since she was young. Remember the wisdom teeth episode? I remember her clinging and crying into her dad like she was mental. She was a teenager. I get being scared but, as my momma would say, have some self control and stop acting like a fool. I can't imagine her having a c-section.

Do you remember when Jim Bob had all the kids donate blood?  Jill was 18-years-old, studying to be a midwife, and broke out crying because she couldn't stand needles.  

[Annb67]

2 minutes ago, Mollie said:

Do you remember when Jim Bob had all the kids donate blood?  Jill was 18-years-old, studying to be a midwife, and broke out crying because she couldn't stand needles.  

Yes!! I still can't imagine her going in for a c-section. I bet she was freaking out. The nurses were probably rolling their eyes. It scares me to death to think she is going to attempt to home birth another 20 pounder after a c-section.

[Albanyguy]

2 minutes ago, Mollie said:

21 minutes ago, Annb67 said:

I think jilly muffin has been a little bat shit since she was young. Remember the wisdom teeth episode? I remember her clinging and crying into her dad like she was mental. She was a teenager. I get being scared but, as my momma would say, have some self control and stop acting like a fool. I can't imagine her having a c-section.

Do you remember when Jim Bob had all the kids donate blood?  Jill was 18-years-old, studying to be a midwife, and broke out crying because she couldn't stand needles.  

I think Jill learned at an early age that bursting into tears and being "afraid" of everything would score her lots of attention and brownie points from Daddy. Jim Bob probably loved having a meek, timid girl-child constantly running to her big, strong he-man Daddy for protection and comfort. Very soothing to his fragile ego.  

[Mollie]

3 minutes ago, Annb67 said:

Yes!! I still can't imagine her going in for a c-section. I bet she was freaking out. The nurses were probably rolling their eyes. It scares me to death to think she is going to attempt to home birth another 20 pounder after a c-section.

If she does try a home birth, she will have to do that without a midwife present.  In Arkansas, it is against the law for a midwife to attend a home birth after a woman has had a c-section.  A midwife will lose her license if she is there, whether assisting or not.  Jilly should go to the hospital for this birth.

[Absolom]

The first birth was a near disaster and I think this one will tell us if Jill and Derick have any sense at all between them. 

[Genevrier]

5 minutes ago, Absolom said:

The first birth was a near disaster and I think this one will tell us if Jill and Derick have any sense at all between them. 

But we already know this. (We know this already? Which way is it better?)

Edited June 15, 2017 by Genevrier

[Fosca]

I do think Jill resents Izzy.  After all, she should have had the perfect pregnancy/birth/baby, and instead it all went wrong.  Combined with PPD, there it is.  It will be VERY interesting to see how she treats this next baby, assuming she survives the birth (I do think she'll have a "midwife" present, as those she worked with didn't seem to care much about stuff like legality--if things go wrong, the midwife will just flee before the ambulance arrives).

I think Derrick also resents Izzy, both for not being perfect and for ruining missionarrying; I can see him thinking that if Izzy was different Jill wouldn't be so fragile and wouldn't be freaking out due to shower caddies and the like.

Poor kid.  Maybe if this next baby is "perfect" they'll figure out a way to leave him with Cathy, which might be best for him.

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, Annb67 said:

I think jilly muffin has been a little bat shit since she was young. Remember the wisdom teeth episode? I remember her clinging and crying into her dad like she was mental. She was a teenager. I get being scared but, as my momma would say, have some self control and stop acting like a fool. I can't imagine her having a c-section.

I don't blame her for that.

At the time I wondered why she would be so freaked out about being sedated, but now that we know she was sexually molsted by her older brother while she was sleeping (and possibly awake) NO WONDER she was terrified of being asleep with some strange man in the room. There are cases of women being molested by asshole medical professionals in their most vulnerable moments in "non fundy world" - her fear was real and understandable. 

[latetotheparty]

11 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I don't blame her for that.

At the time I wondered why she would be so freaked out about being sedated, but now that we know she was sexually molsted by her older brother while she was sleeping (and possibly awake) NO WONDER she was terrified of being asleep with some strange man in the room. There are cases of women being molested by asshole medical professionals in their most vulnerable moments in "non fundy world" - her fear was real and understandable. 

Funny how hindsight makes sense of things. 

[JoanArc]

51 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I don't blame her for that.

At the time I wondered why she would be so freaked out about being sedated, but now that we know she was sexually molsted by her older brother while she was sleeping (and possibly awake) NO WONDER she was terrified of being asleep with some strange man in the room. There are cases of women being molested by asshole medical professionals in their most vulnerable moments in "non fundy world" - her fear was real and understandable. 

"But it was nothing!"

[GeeGolly]

I think Jill's midwife already lost her license, so no worries.

[OpieTaylor]

When Jill told Joy that Joy will be closest to Austin and some other people may not understand why Joy is no longer their best friend:  maybe Jill was referring to a problem she had with Derick; maybe Derick and his brother were very close and Jill couldn't handle that and demanded that Derick be her best friend and no one else's. Cuz Jill has never seemed to have any best friends.  

[FakeJoshDuggar]

3 hours ago, Mollie said:

If she does try a home birth, she will have to do that without a midwife present.  In Arkansas, it is against the law for a midwife to attend a home birth after a woman has had a c-section.  A midwife will lose her license if she is there, whether assisting or not.  Jilly should go to the hospital for this birth.

Silly Mollie, no one that the Duggars use have an actual midwifery license.

[Christina87]

3 hours ago, Fosca said:

I do think Jill resents Izzy.  After all, she should have had the perfect pregnancy/birth/baby, and instead it all went wrong.  Combined with PPD, there it is.  It will be VERY interesting to see how she treats this next baby, assuming she survives the birth (I do think she'll have a "midwife" present, as those she worked with didn't seem to care much about stuff like legality--if things go wrong, the midwife will just flee before the ambulance arrives).

I think Derrick also resents Izzy, both for not being perfect and for ruining missionarrying; I can see him thinking that if Izzy was different Jill wouldn't be so fragile and wouldn't be freaking out due to shower caddies and the like.

Poor kid.  Maybe if this next baby is "perfect" they'll figure out a way to leave him with Cathy, which might be best for him.

Bingo on Derrick!!! This explains so much. PPD and a huge case of arrested development works for Jill, but I always wondered what his problem was. That makes so much sense! He was all about Izzy when they brought him home from the hospital, and things have gone downhill since. 

I have a bad feeling that Jill will bond with this baby, and still stay frigid with Izzy. I feel like she is finally mature enough to have a baby, and she had a modicum more control over her life now, and somewhat more realistic expectations. When she had Izzy, she thought for sure the birth would go perfectly, and then the josh scandal and first trip to DA happened. I've always thought that for her, Izzy is a souvenir from a bad time in her life that she wishes she could redo. Yes, I think she is unhappy now, but the changes after this baby's birth probably won't be dramatic. I could see her focusing on this child as the one thing going well in her life, and...Izzy who?

[xwordfanatik]

Poor little Izzy.  He has parents who value grifting for dollars more than they do him.  

I'm sure Jill is praying that #3 is a girl, who would be a sister mom before she's even old enough to be a babysitter, for those of us in the real world.  I really can't see Jill stopping at two kids, even if she ends up having another C-section.  Boob would frown on that, and Boob is the puppeteer holding the strings, and more than likely, all that TLC cash.

[Christina87]

I'm watching this train wreck again (I know, I know), and I didn't catch Jill's look of horror when Izzy dropped the baby the first time around! Hahahaha that makes her appear so dumb! Derrick's overreaction to everything is so disconcerting. He seems to have no idea how a baby should act. 

[Nysha]

4 hours ago, Christina87 said:

I have a bad feeling that Jill will bond with this baby, and still stay frigid with Izzy. I feel like she is finally mature enough to have a baby, and she had a modicum more control over her life now, and somewhat more realistic expectations. When she had Izzy, she thought for sure the birth would go perfectly, and then the josh scandal and first trip to DA happened. I've always thought that for her, Izzy is a souvenir from a bad time in her life that she wishes she could redo.

This is my fear. Both parents seem to resent Israel. If they bond with Samuel, he'll be the golden child and Israel will be the scapegoat who just can't get anything right no matter how hard he tries. Since he's the oldest, it will be easy to justify punishing him more severely and for things the younger one does, since he should have known better and stopped him. 

Or, I may be projecting my role as the resented child onto Israel and in reality he's loved and cherished as all children should be.

[Obsidian]

6 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I think Jill's midwife already lost her license, so no worries.

Well, thank goodness for that! Can't be worrying about pesky laws.

 

Im starting to dislike Jill and Derick as much as I do Mechelle and Blob. I can overlook the lack of work ethic, and even misappropriating donations, but if they value their child less than they value their parents' ridiculous beliefs (or money) then they deserve ... well, I don't know what exactly. But I'd love them to have a reality check and realise with horror that they have actually failed in their holier-than-thou Jesus mission because they were too busy treating Izzy like a small adult and posing for the camera to actually reflect on what it is that their mission should be. I'm pretty sure Jesus wouldn't want people screwing their children up in his name. They're all (supposedly) about serving others... Jana says that her mission/work is to serve her family. How about Jill and Derick starting by serving their own family by raising their children and loving them? 

[queenanne]

I feel like Jill clearly doesn't care about visual optics from her own ragbag self, so doesn't see the need for it in respect of Izzy.  

However, as standard "tattletale daughter", which suggests she's huge on rules and norms and people who don't follow the rules being identified as "other", I also think she cares very much about perfect standardized behavior out of the kid.

Conversely, Jessa (a) cares about appearances and (b) knows she's not some kind of tame puppy herself (I was going to say "snot", but that seems unjust because Spurgey isn't badly-behaved from what we see); so we get Jessa's parenting attitude out of Jessa.

[Whyyouneedaname]

13 hours ago, JoanArc said:

"But it was nothing!"

let's us know that she probably thought it was and was made to say that, shows that her wounds are very real and very near the surface, shes just unable to deal with that because of her parents.

[Normades]

17 hours ago, floridamom said:

I still can't believe that Derelict had this vomiting issue since high school and didn't diagnose and treat this years ago.

Have to jump in here with my own son's experience.  Believe it!!  My son had vomiting/gastro problems since he was a teen.  We went from doctor to doctor and had many tests without diagnosis, except keep trying to eat, calm down, it's stress.  Finally when things really got bad and  he was in and out of the ER, a urologist saved his life by noticing a finding on a CT scan.  He told us to look into that finding.  It was not something we would have know to look at and doctors wrote it off as a positional finding because the problem he ended up being diagnosed with is so rare and usually found in teenage girls.  He got to the point of being unable to eat solid food or keep himself hydrated and we almost lost him a couple of times last year.  It took one smart doctor who wasn't even a specialist in that field to point out the strange finding and for us to basically tell the doctors what to look for to get him the help he needed.  Even armed with those test results there were doctors who told us there was no way he had that condition.  Eventually after going to high profile hospitals and pushing hard for help, he had surgery and is doing very well.  Getting good healthcare isn't easy and don't always think it's the patient/family who is not trying to get help.  There are a lot of condescending medical staff out there who will act like you know nothing.  I can't tell you how many times I've told healthcare workers about his conditions and they act like they know all about it, but then they say things that I know are completely wrong.  When you get a doctor that admits he doesn't know it all, that is someone who is good.  

I hope D gets the help he needs.  He certainly has some of the symptoms my son had, but who knows what's going on with him.  Many people heaped judgement on my son and myself for not "fixing" it right away.  Our society has just so much patience for health issues and when they're aren't resolved after a short time, people seem to get tired of hearing it and want to move on.  It's a hard situation to be in, and I feel a lot of guilt because my son had to suffer for so long, but honestly I don't know what else we could have done.  My point is, maybe D and his mother have been trying to figure out what's wrong (I hope so).  I do doubt Duggar influence will help his (or any) health situation, tho.

[andromeda331]

2 hours ago, Normades said:

Have to jump in here with my own son's experience.  Believe it!!  My son had vomiting/gastro problems since he was a teen.  We went from doctor to doctor and had many tests without diagnosis, except keep trying to eat, calm down, it's stress.  Finally when things really got bad and  he was in and out of the ER, a urologist saved his life by noticing a finding on a CT scan.  He told us to look into that finding.  It was not something we would have know to look at and doctors wrote it off as a positional finding because the problem he ended up being diagnosed with is so rare and usually found in teenage girls.  He got to the point of being unable to eat solid food or keep himself hydrated and we almost lost him a couple of times last year.  It took one smart doctor who wasn't even a specialist in that field to point out the strange finding and for us to basically tell the doctors what to look for to get him the help he needed.  Even armed with those test results there were doctors who told us there was no way he had that condition.  Eventually after going to high profile hospitals and pushing hard for help, he had surgery and is doing very well.  Getting good healthcare isn't easy and don't always think it's the patient/family who is not trying to get help.  There are a lot of condescending medical staff out there who will act like you know nothing.  I can't tell you how many times I've told healthcare workers about his conditions and they act like they know all about it, but then they say things that I know are completely wrong.  When you get a doctor that admits he doesn't know it all, that is someone who is good.  

I hope D gets the help he needs.  He certainly has some of the symptoms my son had, but who knows what's going on with him.  Many people heaped judgement on my son and myself for not "fixing" it right away.  Our society has just so much patience for health issues and when they're aren't resolved after a short time, people seem to get tired of hearing it and want to move on.  It's a hard situation to be in, and I feel a lot of guilt because my son had to suffer for so long, but honestly I don't know what else we could have done.  My point is, maybe D and his mother have been trying to figure out what's wrong (I hope so).  I do doubt Duggar influence will help his (or any) health situation, tho.

I completely believe it. That's pretty much been my experience when it comes to doctors and my family's medical problems or my own. It is incredible how hard it is to find doctors who will listen and help.

[Arwen Evenstar]

Still not finished watching the Joy wedding episode.  Have to send my headship out on an errand or something to get the last half hour of it.

But I have to say how struck I was by how Jill just left Izzy by the clothes rack like he was  an article of clothing that had fallen down off one of the hangers.  Could have been editing making it look bad, but we are talking about Michelle 2.0 here.  Izzy is a Giant White Baby and might have been too heavy to lift, but she could have at least told him it was time to go.  I guess she figured that Driftwood, Mima, or one of The Lost Girls would watch over him/was already in the room with him?  You don't  just go shopping and leave your baby on the floor like that!

Got so tired of hearing Moaning Muffy just droning on with that dead eyed wooden stare and nothing interesting to say.  She's hard to watch.  The fact that she's boring, preachy, sanctimonious, and all around tiresome doesn't keep me from noticing that there's something very off kilter about her.

I sincerely hope and pray she goes to the hospital to attempt a VBAC and not at home.  She claims the doc that attended her c-section saw to it that she'd be able to have a VBAC next time.  But Muffy, there's no guarantee; something could still go wrong.  At least if you're already at the hospital, you know you're safer there than at home.

[Marigold]

I was just thinking about Jill/Derick and Jinger/Jeremy.

Really, aren't they doing the same thing, just in different locations?

Jeremy stays in the apartment and writes his masterpiece sermon while Jinger cooks and does some laundry. Jeremy doesn't appear to be "ministering" much to anyone or maintaining the church building etc. 

Derick seems to lurk around in Danger America most of the day.  Jill has posted that Derick preaches once a week.  It appears that they do little in terms of humanitarian work.  Jill is home with Izzy, cooks and does laundry.  

It's really the SAME life!  OK, that's really bizarre when you think about it.