Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[SMama]

I have a question for those of you well versed on the Duggars. I hope I can get my point across, and that it is appropriate to ask.

This happened pre-pandemic but I can’t recall how far back. It definitely happened before Jill made healthy changes in her life.

A poster claimed to have contacted Cathy to ask how she felt about Jill’s lack of education, and was she worried about Jill homeschooling the boys.

The poster said Cathy allegedly said she would make sure the boys would get a good education. Said poster disappeared when some posters pointed out it was unethical to pump Cathy for information then come here to report.

Shortly after that Cathy posted on Twitter singing the praises of homeschooling. She claimed she had helped homeschooled kids get into college. At the time I wondered if the parents did such a great job, why did the kids need Cathy’s help. 

My dumb question is coming. Was Cathy playing the long game steering the Dillards towards ebil public school?

Derick and Jill seemed pretty set on homeschooling, then overnight the public school fairy arrived and Israel is in public school. I have no problem with their change of heart. The boys and any future children will benefit beyond measure. 

I must admit that perhaps Derick was appeasing Jill until he convinced her otherwise. But I also wonder if Cathy was involved in helping Jill see what’s best for Israel and Sam. 

[Rootbeer]

57 minutes ago, SMama said:

I have a question for those of you well versed on the Duggars. I hope I can get my point across, and that it is appropriate to ask.

This happened pre-pandemic but I can’t recall how far back. It definitely happened before Jill made healthy changes in her life.

A poster claimed to have contacted Cathy to ask how she felt about Jill’s lack of education, and was she worried about Jill homeschooling the boys.

The poster said Cathy allegedly said she would make sure the boys would get a good education. Said poster disappeared when some posters pointed out it was unethical to pump Cathy for information then come here to report.

Shortly after that Cathy posted on Twitter singing the praises of homeschooling. She claimed she had helped homeschooled kids get into college. At the time I wondered if the parents did such a great job, why did the kids need Cathy’s help. 

My dumb question is coming. Was Cathy playing the long game steering the Dillards towards ebil public school?

Derick and Jill seemed pretty set on homeschooling, then overnight the public school fairy arrived and Israel is in public school. I have no problem with their change of heart. The boys and any future children will benefit beyond measure. 

I must admit that perhaps Derick was appeasing Jill until he convinced her otherwise. But I also wonder if Cathy was involved in helping Jill see what’s best for Israel and Sam. 

I can see Cathy playing a role in the decision, if only because Jill had absolutely no experience with public schooling.  I'd imagine circumstances also played a big part.  As Israel was becoming old enough for school, it was apparent that Jill was struggling as a parent, as a wife, as a daughter; in all aspects of her life.  I could see a counselor helping her see the wisdom of giving herself a little space to breathe and not taking on the kids' education when she was already overwhelmed.  And I can see both Cathy and Derick reassuring her that public schooling could be a great thing for Israel and for her.

All indications are that it has gone very well for all of them and she isn't going to hesitate when Sam's turn comes.

Edited July 13, 2021 by Rootbeer

[Cinnabon]

1 hour ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Honestly, they are not. 

Honestly, I consider all organized religion to be cultish. But everyone’s mileage varies 🤷‍♀️

[GeeGolly]

I'm guessing Derick panicked when commenters were telling him Jill was ill-equipped to educate his boys. He has two chances to do a three-peat with Pistol Pete. Gotta make sure his boys get into OSU.

[crazy8s]

10 minutes ago, Rootbeer said:

I can see Cathy playing a role in the decision, if only because Jill had absolutely no experience with public schooling.  I'd imagine circumstances also played a big part.  As Israel was becoming old enough for school, it was apparent that Jill was struggling as a parent, as a wife, as a daughter; in all aspects of her life.  I could see a counselor helping her see the wisdom of giving herself a little space to breathe and not taking on the kids' education when she was already overwhelmed.  And I can see both Cathy and Derick reassuring her that public schooling could be a great thing for Israel and for her.

All indications are that it has gone very well for all of them and she isn't going to hesitate when Sam's turn comes.

Since Jill was never in charge of the the dining table school as a sister mom, I think maybe she struggled with the preschool home schooling she was trying to do. I expect she was rigid about what Izzy should be doing and expected him to have the attention span and interest in whatever she was trying to teach. He was stressed, she was stressed.

Derick went to public school, they picked a house where the boys could go to the same school he attended  I think. Cathy was probably a second voice behind Derick in agreement on school for Izzy. Jill must agree Derick turned out acceptable to God, and at one point JB duggar, even with evil public school, so it would be ok. The counselor may have agreed/encouraged as well.

Izzy seemed well prepared for kindergarten as far as basic skills, but both Izzy and Jill seem so much less stressed since she is not playing the teacher role.

 

[JoanArc]

16 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm guessing Derick panicked when commenters were telling him Jill was ill-equipped to educate his boys. He has two chances to do a three-peat with Pistol Pete. Gotta make sure his boys get into OSU.

Yup, he'll never rest until one or both are Pistol Pete.

[Zella]

17 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

Yup, he'll never rest until one or both are Pistol Pete

That sounds like a villain origin story right there. LOL 

[emmawoodhouse]

Three camping videos in the link. I haven't watched them. 😁

https://www.dillardfamily.com/2021/07/camping-on-the-buffalo-national-river/

[JoanArc]

1 hour ago, Zella said:

That sounds like a villain origin story right there. LOL 

Bibleman had a few interesting villains!

 

 

[lascuba]

2 hours ago, Cinnabon said:

Honestly, I consider all organized religion to be cultish. But everyone’s mileage varies 🤷‍♀️

What's religion if not cults so old that the serial numbers have faded?

I don't think Cathy played any sort of long game regarding Jill and public school. I'm not even convinced that Cathy or Derick were particularly concerned about her ability to provide a good education based on her own (lack of) education. I think Jill is a hot mess when overwhelmed and she was clearly overwhelmed with 2 kids and keeping house and not have a stay at home husband. Derick probably started gently suggesting public school as an option to consider and the idea took hold. 

[realityfan26]

51 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Three camping videos in the link. I haven't watched them. 😁

https://www.dillardfamily.com/2021/07/camping-on-the-buffalo-national-river/

I watched the first one and I'll watch the others later. I love camping and kudos to them for having accomplished the trip last minute. Looked like a normal family camping trip except Jill filming all of the time, but considering her YouTube is probably their main income, I don't blame her. 15 minute video of probably an 8 hour day.

Edited July 14, 2021 by realityfan26

[Lady Whistleup]

I wonder if Izzy being naturally bright and curious made them decide on public school? Izzy just seems like someone who is naturally bookish and wasn't going to be happy making forts at home forever. 

[lascuba]

1 hour ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I wonder if Izzy being naturally bright and curious made them decide on public school? Izzy just seems like someone who is naturally bookish and wasn't going to be happy making forts at home forever. 

I really don't think that would be a factor for them at all. If anything, Israel being naturally bright would make them more likely to homeschool because they could point to that brightness and claim it's due to Jill's stellar teach skills. 

[Future Cat Lady]

I think public school was always the plan for Derick.

[emmawoodhouse]

15 minutes ago, Future Cat Lady said:

I think public school was always the plan for Derick.

When Izzy was maybe 3 and Jill started him in "pre-school," she insisted that he would be homeschooled. I think she came to the realization, maybe with the help of therapy, that she wasn't cut out to add Teacher to her plate as a homemaker. 

[Quilt Fairy]

How does Jill's camping trip compare with Jessa's?

[emmawoodhouse]

11 minutes ago, Quilt Fairy said:

How does Jill's camping trip compare with Jessa's?

I haven't watched either Jessa's or Jill's videos. 😁

[BigBingerBro]

[SMama]

7 hours ago, Quilt Fairy said:

How does Jill's camping trip compare with Jessa's?

Jill & Derick brought a lot of toys, sand toys, mainly for Sam to amuse himself while Israel fished with Derick.

Jill was with Sam who was upset there was no sand. She redirected him to play with the water and stones. Later they found a tiny area they called a beach. Sam had his wet sand and was happy as a clam. 

Lots of interaction between Jill and Derick. Too many kisses between them.

Although it was allegedly a spur of the moment camping trip, the family seemed to do quite a lot, at least during the first video. No peeing by the tent. Kids did not seem bored out of their minds.

[kaleidoscope]

The part of the camping trip that stood out to me was the nature hike, and the bathing in the river.  They had a true experience.  The park ranger came by and gave the boys books and told them about an elk sighting.  They got in the car to see the elk.  The cooking over the campfire for breakfast actually made me hungry!

[GeeGolly]

Oh my goodness, Jill couldn't have dipped a corner of a towel in the river and washed the kids? I was freezing just watching them.

And I never noticed before, but Sammy doesn't talk much better than Henry.

Overall though, the kids had a pretty full camping experience.

[Rootbeer]

 I only caught a few minutes of the first couple videos, but loved it in the second one where Sammy looked adorable peeping up over the covers while Jill explained how he crawled into bed with them in the middle of the night.

It looked a a well-planned and executed camping excursion and that Jill and Derick thought ahead to plan activities that were suitable and fun for both kids.

[Madtown]

I watched the videos and thought they did a great job on their trip, it was very well planned out. The boys seemed to really enjoy it and seeing how exciting Izzy was to go fishing made me smile. Sam is too adorable and I just want to squeeze him!

I know we don't see everything in the videos, but it was nice to see Jill enjoy the time and they were very well prepared. I'm not saying she didn't have any moments of stress, but she seemed to really enjoy their time  camping. Something she probably never dreamed she would do.

I wish they could take Sprugeon with them someday. Show him what camping really is. I remember going places with my cousins without my parents and vice versa. We all had a blast, but were much closer than Izzy and Sam are with their cousins.

I like that they take trips and are giving their boys some really nice family memories. I also love how exicted Fenna was to see them and how they were so excited to see her. It showed just how much they really love her.

 

[CalicoKitty]

I'm going to make a guess that Izzy and Sam weren't subjected to a long sermon before having fun, either.  I really felt bad for Spurge and Henry on that trip.

[Minivanessa]

1 hour ago, Rootbeer said:

 It looked a a well-planned and executed camping excursion and that Jill and Derick thought ahead to plan activities that were suitable and fun for both kids.

 

Just now, CalicoKitty said:

I'm going to make a guess that Izzy and Sam weren't subjected to a long sermon before having fun, either.  I really felt bad for Spurge and Henry on that trip.

Snap. When I read @Rootbeer's comment about fun activities, I thought immediately of Spurgeon and Henry having to sit in their hotel room while Ben preached at them - and Jessa shot YouTube video of it all. 

[lookeyloo]

Do we think Jessa watched Jill's videos on the "sly"?

[Ohiopirate02]

1 minute ago, lookeyloo said:

Do we think Jessa watched Jill's videos on the "sly"?

Of course she watches Jill's videos.  Jessa needs to keep up on all of her siblings so she can one up them later.  

[lookeyloo]

1 minute ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Of course she watches Jill's videos.  Jessa needs to keep up on all of her siblings so she can one up them later.  

She might get some ideas on how to do things better since Duggar Different is really boring.

[JoanArc]

3 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Of course she watches Jill's videos.  Jessa needs to keep up on all of her siblings so she can one up them later.  

When has she ever been successful one-upping ANYONE? She has a mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. Useless spouse, no room, 4 kids, no discernible talent, education, and  a cold fish personality.

They ALL got her beat.

[Spazamanaz]

Just now, JoanArc said:

 mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. 

Bahahahahaha  Such a great description!  Too funny! 

[GeeGolly]

14 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

When has she ever been successful one-upping ANYONE? She has a mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. Useless spouse, no room, 4 kids, no discernible talent, education, and  a cold fish personality.

They ALL got her beat.

Well Jessa did bring enough bedding for her three kids when they camped. Jill brought one sleeping bag for her two boys. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[Madtown]

20 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

 a mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. 

I want this for a new thread title! Just put The Seewalds in front of it. 

Edited July 14, 2021 by Madtown

[JoanArc]

6 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Well Jessa did bring enough bedding for her three kids when they camped. Jill brought one sleeping bag for her two boys. 🤷🏽‍♀️

And Jessa's kids do have enough hair for 5 people...

[Lady Whistleup]

28 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

When has she ever been successful one-upping ANYONE? She has a mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. Useless spouse, no room, 4 kids, no discernible talent, education, and  a cold fish personality.

They ALL got her beat.

I think Jessa is still kind of riding her rep as the "hot" Duggar sister, and also her knowledge that she might be JB and Michelle's favorite now 

[Suzn]

19 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

When has she ever been successful one-upping ANYONE? She has a mold chalet on the slopes of diaper mountain. Useless spouse, no room, 4 kids, no discernible talent, education, and  a cold fish personality.

They ALL got her beat.

There was a brief time when Jill was presenting recipes for beige food and seemed to be floundering both emotionally and for content, that Jessa's offerings were more attractive and coherent.  I don't personally care for anything that either presents, but Jill's children seem in much better shape than Jessa's.  They are cleaner and don't seem feral.  Jessa's kids look sweaty, greasy and unkempt and they are climbing around on furniture and counters and seem to be allowed to do anything, including juggling chainsaws.

 

[SMama]

37 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Well Jessa did bring enough bedding for her three kids when they camped. Jill brought one sleeping bag for her two boys. 🤷🏽‍♀️

It looked like an adult sleeping bag. If that was the case it has ample room for both boys. Sam ended up migrating to his parents’ bed anyway.

[Guest]

This thread is for discussing Jill and Derrick, not religion and the history of cults. Please make sure your post is primarily about the Dillards.

[xwordfanatik]

2 hours ago, JoanArc said:

And Jessa's kids do have enough hair for 5 people...

They should donate some to her follicle-challenged brothers.  

[iwantcookies]

2 hours ago, Madtown said:

I want this for a new thread title! Just put The Seewalds in front of it. 

Me too! 

[awaken]

3 hours ago, Suzn said:

There was a brief time when Jill was presenting recipes for beige food and seemed to be floundering both emotionally and for content, that Jessa's offerings were more attractive and coherent.  I don't personally care for anything that either presents, but Jill's children seem in much better shape than Jessa's.  They are cleaner and don't seem feral.  Jessa's kids look sweaty, greasy and unkempt and they are climbing around on furniture and counters and seem to be allowed to do anything, including juggling chainsaws.

 

Including running around with fireworks! 😳

[BigBingerBro]

[lascuba]

The difference between Jill and Jessa's social media presences is, to me, similar to the the differences between the Bates and the Duggars. Like the Bates with the Duggars, Jill paid attention not only to what the general public thought of her social media posts and statements, but to how they reacted to her siblings, particularly Jessa, and adjusted accordingly. Because let's not forget, it wasn't that long ago that Jill posted pictures of her kids looking utterly filthy, of them climbing on really precarious surfaces, of Derick looking annoyed when Israel wasn't enraptured by his Bible reading. And like the Bates and Duggars, the public has taken the social  media posts of Jessa and Jill, assumed them to be accurate daily representations of their lives, and chosen to hate or love them based on those assumptions, even though, when it comes right down to it, they are no different where it really counts. The Bates are naturally charming and have real jobs, and Jill is an awkwardly friendly extrovert who's kid is currently in public school, but their beliefs are just as toxic and the public polish obscures the messy underbelly of their lives.

 

[Suzn]

2 hours ago, lascuba said:

The difference between Jill and Jessa's social media presences is, to me, similar to the the differences between the Bates and the Duggars. Like the Bates with the Duggars, Jill paid attention not only to what the general public thought of her social media posts and statements, but to how they reacted to her siblings, particularly Jessa, and adjusted accordingly. Because let's not forget, it wasn't that long ago that Jill posted pictures of her kids looking utterly filthy, of them climbing on really precarious surfaces, of Derick looking annoyed when Israel wasn't enraptured by his Bible reading. And like the Bates and Duggars, the public has taken the social  media posts of Jessa and Jill, assumed them to be accurate daily representations of their lives, and chosen to hate or love them based on those assumptions, even though, when it comes right down to it, they are no different where it really counts. The Bates are naturally charming and have real jobs, and Jill is an awkwardly friendly extrovert who's kid is currently in public school, but their beliefs are just as toxic and the public polish obscures the messy underbelly of their lives.

 

I think you nailed it!

[questionfear]

2 hours ago, lascuba said:

The difference between Jill and Jessa's social media presences is, to me, similar to the the differences between the Bates and the Duggars. Like the Bates with the Duggars, Jill paid attention not only to what the general public thought of her social media posts and statements, but to how they reacted to her siblings, particularly Jessa, and adjusted accordingly. Because let's not forget, it wasn't that long ago that Jill posted pictures of her kids looking utterly filthy, of them climbing on really precarious surfaces, of Derick looking annoyed when Israel wasn't enraptured by his Bible reading. And like the Bates and Duggars, the public has taken the social  media posts of Jessa and Jill, assumed them to be accurate daily representations of their lives, and chosen to hate or love them based on those assumptions, even though, when it comes right down to it, they are no different where it really counts. The Bates are naturally charming and have real jobs, and Jill is an awkwardly friendly extrovert who's kid is currently in public school, but their beliefs are just as toxic and the public polish obscures the messy underbelly of their lives.

 

I would also add that, much like the Bates vs the Duggars, Jill generally looks prettier than Jessa these days. Admittedly, I've always thought Jill was more attractive, but she's aesthetically more pleasing than sweatpants and t-shirts Jessa. It's the same way the Bates sometimes get a pass because they're more traditionally attractive. 

And "awkwardly friendly extrovert" is an amazing way to describe Jill! 

[Minivanessa]

2 hours ago, lascuba said:

. . .  it wasn't that long ago that Jill posted pictures of her kids looking utterly filthy, of them climbing on really precarious surfaces, of Derick looking annoyed when Israel wasn't enraptured by his Bible reading.  . . 

Yep. And, the Dillards have moved on from those days. If Jill's house is messy she's no longer featuring it on social media, and her kids seem genuinely relaxed and engaged in age-appropriate activities. Jill has recently been reading a non-religious book to Sam. The family went camping and fishing and wildlife-watching.

Of course what she puts on social media is selected and edited and isn't their whole life 24/7. That's true of everybody who posts on social media. 

[JoanArc]

15 minutes ago, questionfear said:

And "awkwardly friendly extrovert" is an amazing way to describe Jill! 

 Awkwardly friendly extrovert with no real friends....

[GeeGolly]

3 hours ago, lascuba said:

The difference between Jill and Jessa's social media presences is, to me, similar to the the differences between the Bates and the Duggars. Like the Bates with the Duggars, Jill paid attention not only to what the general public thought of her social media posts and statements, but to how they reacted to her siblings, particularly Jessa, and adjusted accordingly. Because let's not forget, it wasn't that long ago that Jill posted pictures of her kids looking utterly filthy, of them climbing on really precarious surfaces, of Derick looking annoyed when Israel wasn't enraptured by his Bible reading. And like the Bates and Duggars, the public has taken the social  media posts of Jessa and Jill, assumed them to be accurate daily representations of their lives, and chosen to hate or love them based on those assumptions, even though, when it comes right down to it, they are no different where it really counts. The Bates are naturally charming and have real jobs, and Jill is an awkwardly friendly extrovert who's kid is currently in public school, but their beliefs are just as toxic and the public polish obscures the messy underbelly of their lives.

 

This has to be killing Jessa, because at one time her SM was the 'curated' one. Izzy is in school and Derick openly disses JB - two things that are unlikely to happen in the Seewald household, so Jessa will forever be behind Jill now.

Jill said the camping trip was right after Derick's graduation. During one of the videos she said they went on a Wednesday. I'm thinking Derick is still without a job, and Jill's clothes shopping for him is for when he actually gets a job.

[Suzn]

18 minutes ago, questionfear said:

I would also add that, much like the Bates vs the Duggars, Jill generally looks prettier than Jessa these days. Admittedly, I've always thought Jill was more attractive, but she's aesthetically more pleasing than sweatpants and t-shirts Jessa. It's the same way the Bates sometimes get a pass because they're more traditionally attractive. 

And "awkwardly friendly extrovert" is an amazing way to describe Jill! 

We all see these people through out own lens.  I never find Jill very attractive with her gummy smile and squinty eyed grin and though Jessa doesn't do much to look her best, is still by far, the most attractive.

[Jynnan tonnix]

3 minutes ago, JoanArc said:

 Awkwardly friendly extrovert with no real friends....

I think she may have, or be on the way to having real friends. She has mentioned neighbors who have been supportive to them. 

Depending on one's circumstances, the term "friends" might mean different things anyway...

I think of all the years Mr Jyn was in the Navy (38 for him overall, and 31 for us as a couple up until he retired), and we moved around every 2-3 years. We had a lot of acquaintances at every duty station - especially as he rose to levels of senior command - and many people we were "friendly" with, often thinking of them as friends, but, more often than not, once the tour was over and we went our separate ways, we more or less lost contact. It's only due to Facebook that I have any clue as to where some of them are.

Even with those people who genuinely DID become good friends, we mostly all moved to very far-flung places, and we very rarely see each other

Luckily, we have developed a very good relationship with one set of our next-door neighbors in the eight years we have been here, and often do things together, but other than that, it's hard to say we have "friends" either. Granted, both Mr. Jyn and I tend toward being introverted (though he is very good at acting extroverted while I am not), and we live in a pretty rural area, so there are not a lot of neighbors or anything here in general, but it's honestly a bit hard to imagine having a real group of long-term friends within a stone's throw, with whom one interacts personally more than once every few years. 

Sorry this went a bit off topic, but the point is that if Jill is on reasonably good terms with a handful of neighbors, that may be more like "real" friendship than she has ever experienced, and, also likely, just as much as many other people from normal upbringings really have.

 

[Minivanessa]

21 minutes ago, Suzn said:

We all see these people through out own lens.  I never find Jill very attractive with her gummy smile and squinty eyed grin and though Jessa doesn't do much to look her best, is still by far, the most attractive.

If I had to choose which of them to sit next to on an airplane trip, I'd pick Jill in a heartbeat. I also think Jill's by no means ugly.

However, I think Jessa won the genetic lottery as to attractive facial bone structure. Also, because her looks don't depend on good grooming, she ought to age well.