S07.E04: A Life To Envy

[Tara Ariano]

Quote

Melissa's boutique opens, Teresa records her audio book, Jacqueline makes progress on her business venture, plus Dolores and her daughter discuss veterinary school. Later, Siggy and Teresa duel over tabloid gossip.

[MsTree]

Wonder who's life we're supposed to envy?

[tabloidlover]

Watched the First Look last night - bored out of my mind.  I had walked away from this show after it's 1st season, and decided to give it another shot this season.   So boring, I just don't think I can do it.   The scene of Joe trying to handle the kids was so poorly acted and so over the top that it insulted my intelligence. 

[archer1267]

11 hours ago, MsTree said:

Wonder who's life we're supposed to envy?

Well, as Melissa's intro said in S3, "I have a life most girls DREAM of." 

I guess I'm an exception.

[MsTree]

12 hours ago, archer1267 said:

Well, as Melissa's intro said in S3, "I have a life most girls DREAM of." 

I guess I'm an exception.

Well, that makes two of us.

[tabloidlover]

Make it three of us.

[RedInk]

On July 30, 2016 at 9:36 AM, tabloidlover said:

Watched the First Look last night - bored out of my mind.  I had walked away from this show after it's 1st season, and decided to give it another shot this season.   So boring, I just don't think I can do it.   The scene of Joe trying to handle the kids was so poorly acted and so over the top that it insulted my intelligence. 

Yes, yes, yes and WHY is Joe happy to participate in these awful scripted storylines? Obviously, Melissa wants viewers to think she's a pampered career woman with an adoring family, but Joe is cast as the family disappointment who is helpless with his own children and constantly rejected by his wife. I can just see the family rehearsing these little scenes before filming ("OK, Joe, you're gonna be like 'I am caveman and need my woman NOW,' and I'm gonna be all like 'EW, no, give me a break and get away from me!") I can't see how he doesn't feel shafted. Maybe he's just that confident?

Edited July 31, 2016 by RedInk

[Bronzedog]

YAAWWWNN!!!

[cereality]

Melissa is married to a Neanderthal, which we already knew. He's old school, I get it but it's 2016 -- he REALLY can't watch his own elementary school age kids (i.e. no baby food; no diapers) for 2 hrs or a half day or whatever it was? And clearly the kids know that he has no clue and they don't have to listen to him; bc in all the scenes with Melissa those kids are pretty well behaved -- probably bc she lays down the law and they know they'll be in trouble if they don't listen. Whereas they realize their dad is a moron.

[Yours Truly]

Okay why is joe g trying so hard to create some imagined conflict between Chris and joe guidice?? Weird as hell.. Sort of looked like he wanted conflict cause he's a bit jealous of Chris and joes easy breezy non dramatic friendship that still stands EVEN when their wives don't get along.. That's was something to make u go hmmmmm

[Chicklet]

Bronzedog you took the Yawn right out of my mouth.

[dosodog]

I? Am still reeling from the yoga scene.

Ew.  Ew.  And ick.

Everything else that happened has been wiped from my memory.

[poeticlicensed]

Did I just get transported back ton1950? All this extolling the virtues of being a housewife, you know old school values. Puleeze!

Joe's face when Tre told him he better not cheat. His face said it all. 

Did anything happen this episode other than stupid Envy? Ugh. 

Ashlee has has enough surgery that she looks like Jackie 2.0

Patiently waiting for next week when jac goes crazy. 

[Sarcastica]

That short clip of Milania shaving Joe's back is something no human being should see. 

[ElsbethTascioni]

Another snoozefest. I'm not buying this new storyline for Joe and Melissa. It all feels very scripted, his ineptitude at watching the kids, his "I'm a caveman" speech, whatever. It smells like a load of BS to me. I don't doubt that he doesn't want to take care of the kids, or that he wants Melissa to wait on him hand and foot and Tarzan, but this feels overworked and tired. I did get a chuckle from seeing his hair transplant scar, but at least he's come to his senses, and kept his head shaved.

Jacqueline continues to be annoying, and Chris with the snack he invented for kids with autism, acting as if it's about giving back to the autism community, GMAFB. Asslee (whoever coined that name, thank you) still needs to STFU.

Delores is nice but boring, Siggy is shrill and grating, Melissa's partner looks like she stole Charlize Theron's wardrobe from Arrested Development.

[sasha206]

Am I crazy, or does Jacqueline look pretty good this season?  Yes, her face is a bit frozen but the hair looks good.  I like the color and cut.

Joe Gorga the caveman act is so fucking annoying.  Enough already.

[Carolina Girl]

Note to Teresa.   You and the others were/are not in prison because you "made a mistake."   You and the others are in prison because YOU COMMITTED A CRIME.   I'm so sick of her making her offense sound like the jurisprudential equivalent of picking up the wrong fork at dinner.

[luckykat]

How on God's green earth did that lawyer pay off her restitution already?  Where did that money come from?

Edited to add:. My google search revealed the restitution order was only for $400,000.00.  I guess I can see how she (the lawyer) was able to scrape that together.   I suppose the $13.5 million debtors remain unpaid.

Edited August 1, 2016 by luckykat

[hoosier80]

I saw just the previews for the latest episode as I was bored (really bored) this afternoon and had prior shows on as background noise.  Where Tre says to Joe Guidice, if you cheat on me I won't forgive you - something to that effect - first thought I had is girlfriend is laying the foundation to divorce him.  No way is she leaving the US if/when Joe is deported.  From what I've read, it's a pretty good chance.  My spidey sense tells me, she's already getting it on with the lawyer, she'll use cheating Joe as an excuse to dump him, have the I was wronged (while I was away at college) poor Tre storyline, then her lawyer will be presented as the guy who saved her, and she'll marry him (a Bravo wedding).  

The rest of the shows are boring.  The whole I want a housewife at home 24/7 is lame.  I really do feel for the Guidice girls, especially Gia.  If there was any real parenting going on, Gia and the other girls would be in counselling.  Gia had to run that damned household when Tre was at 'college'.

[luckykat]

Chris Laurita doesn't have a Plan B?  Here's a thought:. GET A JOB!  

[Straycat80]

I agree with everyone who said this show is a huge yawnfest. And I'm not buying the fake story about Joe Go and the 'want my wife to stay home' B.S. And they've got the kids in on the acting crazy and bratty for the camera's too.

I do feel sorry for the Guidice girls but not Tre. I hate when someone famous breaks the law and then gets treated like a victim when they get out of jail. Those audio book people falling and fawning all over her made me sick. 

[Bronzedog]

8 minutes ago, luckykat said:

Chris Laurita doesn't have a Plan B?  Here's a thought:. GET A JOB!  

This!  I pretty much thought the same thing.  First BLK, now this scheme.  Oh, Chris, honey, just get a 9 to 5.

[charmed1]

Oh no. Melissa's hag sisters have returned.

[Bronzedog]

Didn't Joe Gorga take care of his kids in a past season when Melissa was on a cast trip?  Maybe Florida?  I think I remember them talking on the phone and all the kids were climbing on Joe?

[cereality]

I know all of these men want to have a "business" -- some way of drawing income from real estate or owning gas stations or whatever, so they don't actually have to spend 40 hrs a week at work. But for Chris Laurita that has meant some failed retail/clothing distribution business (a long time ago); some kind of wine supply business which appears to be gone now (for which they took the trip to Cali. where JoeGo was talking to his mistress by phone while Theresa was trying to get him to get it on in a field); black water -- probably the dumbest idea on earth; and popcorn -- which already exists as a marketed good in every grocery store in America.

At what point do you wake up and realize that you are NOT the entrepreneurial type and get yourself a job working for someone else? I kind of wonder if he doesn't have a college degree -- I think most of these people don't, and it is hard to get hired these days without one. Though you'd think someone in the NJ Italian community with a developed business that actually turns a profit could hire him as an office manager or something -- like some construction company or the Brownstone or something.

[filmfan2480]

Yeah, the whole Joe G/Melissa ENVY drama feels false to me, as well.

I kind of like Siggy. She's funny, if loud. Can't tell if she's trying a little too hard or is that "just HER".

Dolores (and co.) is lovely, but also boring.

Edited August 1, 2016 by filmfan2480

[heatherchandler]

On July 30, 2016 at 9:36 AM, tabloidlover said:

Watched the First Look last night - bored out of my mind.  I had walked away from this show after it's 1st season, and decided to give it another shot this season.   So boring, I just don't think I can do it.   The scene of Joe trying to handle the kids was so poorly acted and so over the top that it insulted my intelligence. 

So boring.  Yeah that was a majorly set up scene with Joe Go "watching" his kids.  Way to pretend to be on the phone with a customer.  "Oh so what's the measurements on that... OH YEAH that noise, my kids are with me... I can't handle this!!"  

Fake.  We know you don't have any customers.  

2 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

Okay why is joe g trying so hard to create some imagined conflict between Chris and joe guidice?? Weird as hell.. Sort of looked like he wanted conflict cause he's a bit jealous of Chris and joes easy breezy non dramatic friendship that still stands EVEN when their wives don't get along.. That's was something to make u go hmmmmm

I feel like Joe Go and Melissa are trying to create a wedge between Teresa and Jac & Joe and Chris.  They are always stirring the pot.  I am pretty sure it's due to jealousy, as always with them.

[breezy424]

I didn't watch the whole episode.  I just 'can't'.  Sorry Joey, you're a bad actor and you're trying to create a storyline.

I appreciate that Delores's daughter wants to be a vet.  Good for her. 

I wonder how Tre bribed Gabriella to get her to film the rock climbing.

What's her name needs to bring it down a notch with the scenes with her kids. 

Chris does work. He does still have BLK.  He's now trying to partner a new product.  

Tre and Juicy's yoga package.  Bleach my eyes....  And note to Tre:  People do make mistakes but sometimes those mistakes are crimes and you pay for that.  And then there are people who commit crimes and they get caught.  I'm looking at you.

[zulualpha]

3 hours ago, ElsbethTascioni said:

. Asslee (whoever coined that name, thank you) still needs to STFU.

So true.  She's an adult now but her calling Teresa names and criticizing her is not a good look.  She's 25 and from what I've seen, knows nothing.  Plus she's working against Chris who seems to desperately want to get back in good with the Guidices.  The Laurita's need the check! 

Gia is really impressing me with her loyalty to her family and her strength and poise.  She went with Teresa to Melissa's store opening even though she stated she'd rather have been at her grandma's b day party with the rest of her family which was sweet and then she was charming to everyone at the party.  She's a good kid.

3 hours ago, hoosier80 said:

If there was any real parenting going on, Gia and the other girls would be in counselling.  Gia had to run that damned household when Tre was at 'college'.

Counseling for what?  They seem like a very loving family with two sets of grandparents chipping in and a full time stay at home father.  It was probably difficult for everyone when Teresa was in prison but families get through hard times and from what I have heard on the show Teresa talked to the girls almost every day.

[jumper sage]

5 hours ago, cereality said:

Melissa is married to a Neanderthal, which we already knew. He's old school, I get it but it's 2016 -- he REALLY can't watch his own elementary school age kids (i.e. no baby food; no diapers) for 2 hrs or a half day or whatever it was?

My grandfather came to America in 1907 and he believed in an equal marriage.  This is ridiculous.

1 hour ago, breezy424 said:

Chris does work. He does still have BLK.  He's now trying to partner a new product.  

What?  The cure for autism didn't pan out?  I am shocked!

[RedheadZombie]

2 hours ago, breezy424 said:

I didn't watch the whole episode.  I just 'can't'.  Sorry Joey, you're a bad actor and you're trying to create a storyline.

I appreciate that Delores's daughter wants to be a vet.  Good for her. 

I wonder how Tre bribed Gabriella to get her to film the rock climbing.

What's her name needs to bring it down a notch with the scenes with her kids. 

Chris does work. He does still have BLK.  He's now trying to partner a new product.  

Tre and Juicy's yoga package.  Bleach my eyes....  And note to Tre:  People do make mistakes but sometimes those mistakes are crimes and you pay for that.  And then there are people who commit crimes and they get caught.  I'm looking at you.

And I hope Delores's daughter sticks to that goal, versus fame whoring like so many of the young adult children on these shows. 

[Muffyn]

2 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

So boring.  Yeah that was a majorly set up scene with Joe Go "watching" his kids.  Way to pretend to be on the phone with a customer.  "Oh so what's the measurements on that... OH YEAH that noise, my kids are with me... I can't handle this!!"  

Fake.  We know you don't have any customers.  

That was the fakest phone call that was ever faked.  First, Joe can't act.  Second, no one is asking him the size of pipe for a manhole.  That doesn't even make sense.  The children being wild was stupid. 

The Gorgas doing caveman Joe.  The Lauritas cozying up to Tre and Joe.  Siggy doing a screech owl impression with her children.  All painfully boring and showing sheer desperation.  If Tre needs a colonic, they'll all battle to catch what she shits out. 

[charmed1]

I'm sorry, I don't buy that Joe Gorga was this poor little unfavored child. I think he was always one of those kids who was just exhausting. "Hey dad, look at me, look at me, look, look, look!"  I bet he wore a curly black wig, refused to wear his glasses, and had a boyfriend named, George Glass, growing up. It burns him up that his father enjoys the company of Joe Giudice. He thrives on attention. Hence, modeling the dress at Melissa's store. I think he was spoiled by his mother and sister. Even when their feud was at its worst, Teresa never blamed her brother. It was always somehow Melissa's fault. Even after he would call Teresa all kinds of names, Teresa would blame Melissa. 

Edited August 1, 2016 by charmed1

[tinaw]

8 hours ago, Sarcastica said:

That short clip of Milania shaving Joe's back is something no human being should see. 

Especially twice

[SuzWhat]

On July 30, 2016 at 10:36 AM, tabloidlover said:

Watched the First Look last night - bored out of my mind.  I had walked away from this show after it's 1st season, and decided to give it another shot this season.   So boring, I just don't think I can do it.   The scene of Joe trying to handle the kids was so poorly acted and so over the top that it insulted my intelligence. 

100% agree.   I stopped watching there and deleted this from my recording schedule.  Done.  

[StevieRocks]

1 hour ago, charmed1 said:

I'm sorry, I don't buy that Joe Gorga was this poor little unfavored child. I think he was always one of those kids who was just exhausting. "Hey dad, look at me, look at me, look, look, look!"  I bet he wore a curly black wig, refused to wear his glasses, and had a boyfriend named, George Glass, growing up. It burns him up that his father enjoys the company of Joe Giudice. He thrives on attention. Hence, modeling the dress at Melissa's store. I think he was spoiled by his mother and sister. Even when their feud was at its worst, Teresa never blamed her brother. It was always somehow Melissa's fault. Even after he would call Teresa all kinds of names, Teresa would blame Melissa. 

Bwah! Agree. And this reminded me so much of Happy Loman running around saying, "I'm losing weight, you notice, Pop?" Very good analysis.

[ghoulina]

Watching Joe Gorga with his kids was just....wow. Painful. Part of me thinks they're amping it up a bit for their storyline. But not all of that can be faked. That dude is a hot mess. And whether they're telling Gino to say - "Make me some food, you woman" - or he came up with that organically (after listening to his dad talk), I'm not impressed. I'm disgusted, quite frankly. And I'm in a pretty traditional marriage. But I CHOSE this route. My husband is very respectful of me, and we are teaching our children (2 boys and 1 girl) how to do everything around the house and in life, so they can choose what is right for them. Bringing your kids up to only expect one way of living is just wrong, if you ask me. 

And, if he is such a "traditional man", shouldn't his kids respect him a bit more, as head of the household? I know it's par for the course for kids to go crazy when their parents are on the phone, but my kids have never hit me with things and sassed me the level that those kids were. Maybe if he was more actively involved in their lives on a daily basis he'd have earned more respect from them. He thinks he can just pop in once in awhile and toss a football around and he's good. He sucks and I hate him. 

 

Dolores's daughter on the other hand - very impressive. She has a great career plan ahead of her and she seems very intelligent and grounded. I don't think not having a college degree is the end of the world; it's certainly not for everyone. But I appreciate that Dolores wants more for her children, instead of thinking she did everything perfectly like some of these clowns. 

 

The Lauritas make me laugh. So now some random popcorn company is going to pull them out of debt? Okay then. Aren't there already half a dozen "good for you" popcorn brands out there? Just stop trying to invent stuff and get a real job. 

Also, what was with Jac acting like she didn't drink when she went out to lunch with Siggy? And Siggy brought her own wine? Can you do that???

 

Tre's book recording crap bored me, but I had to laugh when she issued her threat to Joe about cheating. Haven't you already been down that path? I did like to see that Chris took the initiative and called Joe. I always liked the friendship between those two. Too bad it looks like the wives are going to ruin it once again. 

[parisprincess]

I must be about ready to jettison this show. I'm reading a good book and usually I'll read during the commercials, but last night I found the book much more interesting than the show and missed most of it. Caught bits and pieces but couldn't for the life of me get into it. Guess I'm down to the New York ladies and the Orange County crazies.

[TexasGal]

In a night full of filler, I rejoiced for a moment to hear Dolores' daughter talk about vets delivering calves from a uterus and not a vagina.  Hallelujah! 

[ghoulina]

7 hours ago, zulualpha said:

Counseling for what?  They seem like a very loving family with two sets of grandparents chipping in and a full time stay at home father.  It was probably difficult for everyone when Teresa was in prison but families get through hard times and from what I have heard on the show Teresa talked to the girls almost every day.

Even if the family is close, it doesn't seem (to me) like they talk about things. Gia seems very emotional lately, with good reason. Gabriella seems to hold it all in. With two parents going off to prison, I don't think it would hurt to have a neutral party help them work through the feelings that this struggle is bringing out in them. 

[Rainny]

8 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

Watching Joe Gorga with his kids was just....wow. Painful. Part of me thinks they're amping it up a bit for their storyline. But not all of that can be faked. That dude is a hot mess. And whether they're telling Gino to say - "Make me some food, you woman" - or he came up with that organically (after listening to his dad talk), I'm not impressed. I'm disgusted, quite frankly. And I'm in a pretty traditional marriage. But I CHOSE this route. My husband is very respectful of me, and we are teaching our children (2 boys and 1 girl) how to do everything around the house and in life, so they can choose what is right for them. Bringing your kids up to only expect one way of living is just wrong, if you ask me. 

And, if he is such a "traditional man", shouldn't his kids respect him a bit more, as head of the household? I know it's par for the course for kids to go crazy when their parents are on the phone, but my kids have never hit me with things and sassed me the level that those kids were. Maybe if he was more actively involved in their lives on a daily basis he'd have earned more respect from them. He thinks he can just pop in once in awhile and toss a football around and he's good. He sucks and I hate him. 

 

Dolores's daughter on the other hand - very impressive. She has a great career plan ahead of her and she seems very intelligent and grounded. I don't think not having a college degree is the end of the world; it's certainly not for everyone. But I appreciate that Dolores wants more for her children, instead of thinking she did everything perfectly like some of these clowns. 

 

The Lauritas make me laugh. So now some random popcorn company is going to pull them out of debt? Okay then. Aren't there already half a dozen "good for you" popcorn brands out there? Just stop trying to invent stuff and get a real job. 

Also, what was with Jac acting like she didn't drink when she went out to lunch with Siggy? And Siggy brought her own wine? Can you do that???

 

Tre's book recording crap bored me, but I had to laugh when she issued her threat to Joe about cheating. Haven't you already been down that path? I did like to see that Chris took the initiative and called Joe. I always liked the friendship between those two. Too bad it looks like the wives are going to ruin it once again. 

I worked up until we had our 3rd son when I quit to stay home full time. Daycare cost more than my paycheck. Even though I stay home our sons know how do their laundry, cook a simple meal, and clean the house. My older 3 even changed diapers for the younger 3 when I needed the help. I made sure they learned these things not only so they could make choices on how they lived their lives, but because my husband is a youngest child and he did nothing for himself growing up. I always say I'm not sticking some poor girl with a man who can't even fry an egg or make toast for himself. 

Both of my Army sons wrote me letters from basic training thanking me because they could not believe there were people who reached the age of 18 and were helpless to do their own laundry. Knowing how to do things made life so much easier for them. 

I also don't understand the lack of respect the kids seemed to have for their father. It had to be an act. Our household isn't over the top traditional and still our kids snap right in line as soon as dad pulls into the driveway. It's always been like clockwork, they hear the garage door and I hear "Dad's home, Oh crap" then the running around to make sure all the stuff he told them to do before he got home is done. They have a good relationship with their dad, they talk, they joke around and do things together but even when they were little they listened to him when he told them not to do something. 

[bichonblitz]

All I can say about this week is that next week looks good. The Jac/Tre friendship implodes already. 

The Gorga kids are unbearable.

Poor Chris Laurita. Every time he lists his house for sale, he has to take it off the market for repairs. If you don't have the money to keep up the McMansion, you shouldn't be living in a McMansion.  

[SweetieDarling]

10 hours ago, luckykat said:

Chris Laurita doesn't have a Plan B?  Here's a thought:. GET A JOB!  

He probably doesn't have any actual job skills.  I wonder if The Brownstone is hiring?

[FamilyVan]

Quote

The Jac/Tre friendship implodes already. 

Yeah but what is Jaq's problem?  I really don't get what her issue is.  She wants to be friends with Teresa but then makes all these digs at her like as if she wants to make Teresa pay for something she did - I don't get it?  I have to say for the first time Tre comes over her house in 5 years to go after her like what was shown in the previews - yikes!  Not cool.

[FaithsMum]

I just watched two episodes and they have been so freaking boring. Next week's previews seems like the show will get more interesting though; I knew Tre and loony Jac couldn't keep up their besties act for long.

Jac's obsession with Tre is really odd though. They haven't been friends in years now and I wish I could believe it's for the show but she's spent the intervening years tweeting up a storm about the Juicy's so I'm inclined to believe she really is THAT obsessed. 

Also, keep Spoon Face Ashlee off my iPad screen, thanks Bravo. I didn't think it was possible for her face to become any more spoon like but indeed it has with all that cosmetic surgery she's had so well done on accomplishing that, I guess. I can't believe that moron is procreating - three generations of Jacqueline. Jesus. 

[SweetieDarling]

Unless you prefer mini popcorn, there doesn't seem to be anything special about the Luarita's new business venture.  I Googled The Little Kernel, and it's claim to fame seems to be that it's smaller than other popcorns.  As for it's other "benefits": All popcorn is whole grain, and gluten free (gluten is a wheat protein), and there is no such thing as GMO popcorn.   http://www.naturalnews.com/050032_non-GMO_label_popcorn_marketing_claims.html 

just sayin'

[ghoulina]

30 minutes ago, FamilyVan said:

Yeah but what is Jaq's problem?  I really don't get what her issue is.  She wants to be friends with Teresa but then makes all these digs at her like as if she wants to make Teresa pay for something she did - I don't get it?  I have to say for the first time Tre comes over her house in 5 years to go after her like what was shown in the previews - yikes!  Not cool.

I don't think Jaq ever had a genuine interest in being friends again. I think she wanted to pretend like they were going to be friends again, so she could get close enough to call Tre out face to face. Having a bunch of solo scenes where she trashes Tre to her irrelevant daughter or makes Chris suffer through her complaints while he brushes her hair just isn't going to cut it. So she had to play nice in order to get some actual screen time with Tre. Then she could really lay in. 

[Juliegirlj]

Considering everyone knows Melissa Gorga has several nanny's, their entire storyline is a big snooze. I heard that Jackie, her partner is actually the majority owner of the store, but allowed Melissa to use it for a storyline to get free publicity. 

Jacqueline and Asslee can suck eggs- what vapid, nasty witches they are. 

Chris Laurita seems like a nice guy, but what an idiot. Quit with the get rich quick and easy schemes and get a real job. Acting as if he is being philanthropic by marketing a healthy snack for Autistic kids is a joke. Especially after we've seen them give their son sugary doughnuts. 

For some reason I kind of like Siggy- but understand why some find her annoying. 

The scene with Teresa telling Joe that infidelity is a deal breaker was awkward, and obviously scripted to do damage control for rumors. They are a very old school Italian family and it would not surprise me if Teresa was aware that Joe had a goomah, and considered it part of the package of being married to an Italian man. Teresa has an underlying sadness about her this season- probably a bit of PTSD and part dealing with the eventual fact that Joe is " going to camp" for a long time. 

[SweetieDarling]

What kinds of drugs is Melissa on that she thought it was a good idea to open up a fashion boutique with the woman in the black tutu, ratty pink fur coat and Phyllis Diller fright wig? 

[Primetimer]

Tabloid rumors, audiobooks, and ill-advised animal-bathing in the latest power rankings.

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