Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[bythelake]

28 minutes ago, CalicoKitty said:

Since there is no mention of chicken broth in the list of ingredients, does she mean to save the grease from broiling the chicken to mix with the rest of the recipe?  Grease does not equal broth in my mind--or my cooking.

She didn’t broil the chicken, she boiled it. (her words). At least it wasn’t canned per her usual recipes. That’s the only nice thing I can say about this concoction. It’s pitiful.

[CalicoKitty]

1 minute ago, bythelake said:

She didn’t broil the chicken, she boiled it. (her words). At least it wasn’t canned per her usual recipes. That’s the only nice thing I can say about this concoction. It’s pitiful.

Ah, Thank you.  I'm glad it is just greasy chicken water, which is better than chicken grease.  When I make chicken broth (in my InstantPot), I add some carrots, onion and celery to give it some flavor.  Then I strain it and cool it and skim the fat.  But that is just me.  I won't be making Jill's recipe in any case!!

[Nysha]

My mom used to make something like this in the 70s. Leftover chopped chicken, a can of cr of chicken soup, 1/2 can of milk, a bag of frozen mixed veggies, and cooked egg noodles, mixed together and put in a casserole dish. Ritz crackers were crushed and mixed with melted butter, then spread on top. It was baked at 350 for 15-20 minutes. Her tuna noodle casserole was the same recipe, but with tuna fish & cr of celery soup. I'm guessing it tasted okay, but I was raised to eat what you were served or else, so I don't have a very refined palate.

[Barb23]

8 hours ago, Nysha said:

My mom used to make something like this in the 70s. Leftover chopped chicken, a can of cr of chicken soup, 1/2 can of milk, a bag of frozen mixed veggies, and cooked egg noodles, mixed together and put in a casserole dish. Ritz crackers were crushed and mixed with melted butter, then spread on top. It was baked at 350 for 15-20 minutes. Her tuna noodle casserole was the same recipe, but with tuna fish & cr of celery soup. I'm guessing it tasted okay, but I was raised to eat what you were served or else, so I don't have a very refined palate.

I also grew up eating something similar to what your mom made.  My mom's always turned out great & it's still one of Mr. Barb's favorites even though my version  doesn't taste as good as my mom's.  (You know how that goes.) What's different btwn my mom's & Jill's is that the cream mixture of my mom's  LIGHTLY covers the noodles & veggies  instead of them swimming in the mixture. 

[questionfear]

I'm still trying to wrap my head around 16oz of hot, cooked sour cream. Actually, on second thought, I'm not, because the very concept gives me a headache and stomachache. 

[galaxychaser]

22 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Chicken on the Ritz

Mar 18, 2019 | Recipes | 2 

This is one of my mom’s favorite dishes. The delicious creamy chicken flavor, combined with poppy seeds and topped with buttery Ritz crackers for a little added crunch, make this a dish that is sure to be a crowd pleaser! 

Makes one 9×13″ pan 

2 (15 oz.) cans cream of mushroom soup

1 (16 oz.) tub sour cream

1 stick butter (1/2 cup), melted

1 box Ritz crackers (4 sleeves), crunched

10 chicken breasts, cooked, cubed

1 (10 oz.) frozen mixed veggies OR broccoli, cooked 

2 t. poppy seeds

Boil chicken and season how you like (reserve 1/2 C. broth). Mix the 1/2 C. broth with sour cream, soup and 1 t. poppy seeds. Put cubed, drained, chicken & cooked veggies in 9×13″ baking dish and cover with sour cream mixture. Crunch up the whole box of crackers in a ziplock bag with melted butter and 1 tsp. poppy seeds and pour on top. Bake uncovered at 350 degrees for 40 min. 

Disclaimer: Recipes on this site are a collection of our favorites. Some are our own recipes and others may have not originated on our site and/or have been adapted from other sites.

That looks like something a cat threw up.

Never mind no cat would eat that. 

Jill is the worst cook ever.

[SeamusOreilly]

On 3/5/2019 at 4:59 PM, awaken said:

I read to my kids in utero, daily their entire lives from birth, as well as having a house full of books and being a voracious reader myself, and both of us have graduate degrees- and two of my three are delayed readers who struggle to be at grade level.  So it's not just how great a job one does as a parent or how well they're taught...sometimes they just are who they are and develop at their own pace despite our best efforts. 

Truth!  I read to my oldest in utero and every day.  She is extremely delayed.  My youngest, only 18 months younger, was basically was on survival mode because my daughter was so challenging and and he was as easy and mellow as it gets.  He was reading at an extremely young age and excels beyond his years in every subject. 🤷🏻‍♀️It’s a crap shoot!

[dariafan]

12 hours ago, CalicoKitty said:

Ah, Thank you.  I'm glad it is just greasy chicken water, which is better than chicken grease.  When I make chicken broth (in my InstantPot), I add some carrots, onion and celery to give it some flavor.  Then I strain it and cool it and skim the fat.  But that is just me.  I won't be making Jill's recipe in any case!!

So, some flavor .... a key component Jill’s food seems the be lacking 

[dariafan]

On 3/16/2019 at 7:14 PM, louannems said:

Back to the Izzy "reading" video, I felt annoyance listening to Jill admonishing him that he's "making it up". The child is still 3 years old!  Even if he is make believe reading, he is showing interest and should be praised for his enthusiasm.

And showing creativity.... was I the only one who was asked “ what do you think happens next”?

[Ijustwantsomechips]

3 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

That looks like something a cat threw up.

Those were my exact workds when i saw the picture!

[Oldernowiser]

It’s my current belief that every time her click count drops she posts another “Blessed Mommy’s Cream O’Crap Casserole” recipe just to get the horror clicks.

Nobody otherwise is this clueless...right?

[DangerousMinds]

She didn’t put any noodles or rice in her slop, did she?

[galaxychaser]

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

She didn’t put any noodles or rice in her slop, did she?

No

[BradandJanet]

If this is another one of Michelle's favorite dishes, I'd sure like to see the rejects.  

[sixlets]

So I've been spending my days watching random YouTube videos.  I can go down any rabbit hole and get lost (if you're looking for some fun ones, let me know).  I also found a site that will show, on average, how much people are bringing in each month with AdSense.  You can also search other social media outlets, but you need the exact name that is being used, otherwise, it won't be found.  I have watched a handful of videos that explain how monetized videos work, and it turns out, the number of subscribers is not as important as some may think.  You need views more than anything.  It's fascinating and crazy at the same time.  There are people pulling in six figures on YouTube.  J&D are not those people according to this, which makes me happy because I can be a bitch like that.

[latetotheparty]

15 minutes ago, sixlets said:

So I've been spending my days watching random YouTube videos.  I can go down any rabbit hole and get lost (if you're looking for some fun ones, let me know).  I also found a site that will show, on average, how much people are bringing in each month with AdSense.  You can also search other social media outlets, but you need the exact name that is being used, otherwise, it won't be found.  I have watched a handful of videos that explain how monetized videos work, and it turns out, the number of subscribers is not as important as some may think.  You need views more than anything.  It's fascinating and crazy at the same time.  There are people pulling in six figures on YouTube.  J&D are not those people according to this, which makes me happy because I can be a bitch like that.

This pleases me. 

[irisheyes]

On 3/18/2019 at 12:53 PM, ginger90 said:

Chicken on the Ritz

Mar 18, 2019 | Recipes | 2 

This is one of my mom’s favorite dishes. The delicious creamy chicken flavor, combined with poppy seeds and topped with buttery Ritz crackers for a little added crunch, make this a dish that is sure to be a crowd pleaser! 

Makes one 9×13″ pan 

2 (15 oz.) cans cream of mushroom soup

1 (16 oz.) tub sour cream

1 stick butter (1/2 cup), melted

1 box Ritz crackers (4 sleeves), crunched

10 chicken breasts, cooked, cubed

1 (10 oz.) frozen mixed veggies OR broccoli, cooked 

2 t. poppy seeds

Boil chicken and season how you like (reserve 1/2 C. broth). Mix the 1/2 C. broth with sour cream, soup and 1 t. poppy seeds. Put cubed, drained, chicken & cooked veggies in 9×13″ baking dish and cover with sour cream mixture. Crunch up the whole box of crackers in a ziplock bag with melted butter and 1 tsp. poppy seeds and pour on top. Bake uncovered at 350 degrees for 40 min. 

Disclaimer: Recipes on this site are a collection of our favorites. Some are our own recipes and others may have not originated on our site and/or have been adapted from other sites.

10 chicken breasts in ONE 9 x 13 pan?!?  She does realize that means inches and not feet, right?  Would there even be ROOM for anything else?  When I make something in a 9 x 13 pan, I use 4 chicken breasts, tops. 

[cmr2014]

13 minutes ago, irisheyes said:

10 chicken breasts in ONE 9 x 13 pan?!?  She does realize that means inches and not feet, right?  Would there even be ROOM for anything else?  When I make something in a 9 x 13 pan, I use 4 chicken breasts, tops. 

I think she means chicken breast halves. My guess is that since this is J'chelle's recipe, these are chicken breast halves of some cut-rate store brand, and are very small. I question how often (or if) J'chelle actually made this. Assuming she's serving 20, that still half a chicken breast half per person -- 20+ grams of protein for each of those undernourished children. That's more than all of the Duggar recipes that Jill has posted combined.

It is, of course, drowning in fat and sodium, so at least it has the main components of a Duggar recipe. 

[Lunera]

I don't understand why she makes such large portions. Is she so dumb she cant figure out how to divide it? I bet she throws away the majority of it. 

[Albanyguy]

6 minutes ago, Lunera said:

I don't understand why she makes such large portions. Is she so dumb she cant figure out how to divide it? I bet she throws away the majority of it. 

Or she just keeps re-heating and serving it to Derick and the kids night after night until it's gone. Making them eat the same casserole three or four meals in a row saves her time and effort and frees her up to do more important things like following Derick to his law school classes.

[Zella]

Just now, Albanyguy said:

Or she just keeps re-heating and serving it to Derick and the kids night after night until it's gone. Making them eat the same casserole three or four meals in a row saves her time and effort and frees her up to do more important things like following Derick to his law school classes.

Anyone can make him a sandwich, ahem, casserole. But only she can babysit him in class and make sure he's not tempted by the attorney harlots. 😂

[MargeGunderson]

10 hours ago, Zella said:

Anyone can make him a sandwich, ahem, casserole. But only she can babysit him in class and make sure he's not tempted by the attorney harlots. 😂

Damn Becky in the third row! 

[sigmaforce86]

On 3/18/2019 at 12:53 PM, ginger90 said:

Chicken on the Ritz

I looked at the picture before I read the title or recipe and I swear I thought it was bannana pudding with 'nilla wafers on top.    This is NOT an appetizing dinner - and for someone trying to be a blogger or influencer or whatever on-line attention she's seeking.......does she not realize or has nobody told her that we eat first with our eyes so maybe beige food on a white plate on a brown table is a more than a little monotone and pretty gross looking to boot.

On 3/17/2019 at 8:30 AM, ginger90 said:

A reply on their blog, to  someone who stated they’ve asked previously, why they aren’t on the show:

Does anyone believe this?  Does JILL believe this or is she willfully lying?  We decided as opposed to TLC kicked us off is really stretching things.  On the other hand months after they were let go her "headship" was still insisting they weren't fired and at one point went as far as to say in an interview that it was not only fully their decision to leave but that TLC actually wanted them to stay on.  The only consistent thing that Jill is parroting is the "headed in a different direction" defense which is what Derrick also said multiple times so I guess that's the party line they trot out for their followers.

Edited March 20, 2019 by sigmaforce86

[Dimi1]

I like to cook and used to make elaborate dishes...but at this stage in my life with hubby (retired)..I like to keep it simple and quick . We tend to decide what we are going to do at the last minute as far as meals , so I don't want to waste food in the fridge if we decide to eat out at the last minute....so that being said...I LIKE COLOR...its so healthy for you and Jill has none....and its not rocket science...you just have to branch out from what you know...for example...I picked up trader joe's cabbage (in a bag) , shaved some red onion in, shaved some watermelon radish in and added equal parts of carolina bbq sauce (from trader joes) and equal parts mayo...add salt and pepper to taste. It was beautiful looking, tasted fantastic, was quick and easy and ....my husband raved thanking me for being a gourmet cook...lol...she just needs to think ...COLOR!!!

[dariafan]

She knows lying is a sin, right?

[queenanne]

16 hours ago, sixlets said:

So I've been spending my days watching random YouTube videos.  I can go down any rabbit hole and get lost (if you're looking for some fun ones, let me know).  I also found a site that will show, on average, how much people are bringing in each month with AdSense.  You can also search other social media outlets, but you need the exact name that is being used, otherwise, it won't be found.  I have watched a handful of videos that explain how monetized videos work, and it turns out, the number of subscribers is not as important as some may think.  You need views more than anything.  It's fascinating and crazy at the same time.  There are people pulling in six figures on YouTube.  J&D are not those people according to this, which makes me happy because I can be a bitch like that.

Yeah, I tried to study it for a lib. sci. paper and the information said ‘YouTube tries hard to hide its algorithm’.  There’s also something about the effect of fully watching a clip versus starting and stopping, with the latter being worth less, or maybe nothing.  YT also takes it upon themselves to periodically roll back the counter to remove partial views, so a watch count can drop considerably.

[Christina87]

https://www.dillardfamily.com/2019/03/confessions-of-a-christ-seeking-millennial/

Has anyone else seen this drivel?!

Already in the first paragraph, he has made me mad! He says he's a typical millennial, sans the bad stereotypes. How arrogant! I feel like a lot of the negative stereotypes don't embody me (love of hookup culture and partying, irresponsibility, ultra-progressive and in your face about it, etc), but no one goes unscathed by ANY bad stereotypes about their generation. I mean, even just thinking about innocuous stereotypes that apply to me, like being on my phone a lot...does Derick not do this? Last time I checked, he was glued to twitter, shooting down people left and right in his zealotry! Maybe he could have said, "although not every stereotype applies to me, I'm pretty typical," or something like that. No one is so special that literally no negative stereotypes apply to them!

Also in the first paragraph, he says he hasn't had spring break in a decade. Yeah, right! His whole LIFE has been spring break! If he'd been steadily working at Walmart until now, he'd have a point, but he has only done ONE YEAR of real work in his life!

Most importantly, everyone needs to go read his paragraph about marriage ASAP, and then tell me he's happy he married Jill! He said nothing positive about her, and while I agree to an extent that a lot of people out there have this notion of "the one," and it keeps them from committing to a decent person, that's not the situation Derick is in. He says the one you're married to is the one, and he talks about (hypothetically) having doubts before marriage, and then keeping them during marriage. He's basically saying to force yourself to be happy with your spouse, because you can't go back and change it...yet he claims to be giving advice to single people? We don't need your advice, because we didn't make that mistake! He also says nothing positive about being married to Jill, or clarifies that his "hypothetical" doubts aren't real. I actually feel bad for her, if she's smart enough to read between the lines! Also, his throwaway sentiment about not being sure sure his mom would be alive when they came back from their honeymoon tells me all I need to know about why he rushed to marry her. If she died, he'd literally only have one relative, which means even more considering that Cathy is adopted. Marrying Jill asap and having a baby sounded a lot better than that. If he weren't such an asshole, I'd feel sorry for him, but I do think he needs to get out. Even as a Christian, he should see how he was vulnerable, and basically tricked by the duggars into such a quick marriage, just for a tv show. That shouldn't sentence Derick and Jill to a miserable life. 

[Scarlett45]

9 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

https://www.dillardfamily.com/2019/03/confessions-of-a-christ-seeking-millennial/

Has anyone else seen this drivel?!

Already in the first paragraph, he has made me mad! He says he's a typical millennial, sans the bad stereotypes. How arrogant! I feel like a lot of the negative stereotypes don't embody me (love of hookup culture and partying, irresponsibility, ultra-progressive and in your face about it, etc), but no one goes unscathed by ANY bad stereotypes about their generation. I mean, even just thinking about innocuous stereotypes that apply to me, like being on my phone a lot...does Derick not do this? Last time I checked, he was glued to twitter, shooting down people left and right in his zealotry! Maybe he could have said, "although not every stereotype applies to me, I'm pretty typical," or something like that. No one is so special that literally no negative stereotypes apply to them!

Also in the first paragraph, he says he hasn't had spring break in a decade. Yeah, right! His whole LIFE has been spring break! If he'd been steadily working at Walmart until now, he'd have a point, but he has only done ONE YEAR of real work in his life!

Most importantly, everyone needs to go read his paragraph about marriage ASAP, and then tell me he's happy he married Jill! He said nothing positive about her, and while I agree to an extent that a lot of people out there have this notion of "the one," and it keeps them from committing to a decent person, that's not the situation Derick is in. He says the one you're married to is the one, and he talks about (hypothetically) having doubts before marriage, and then keeping them during marriage. He's basically saying to force yourself to be happy with your spouse, because you can't go back and change it...yet he claims to be giving advice to single people? We don't need your advice, because we didn't make that mistake! He also says nothing positive about being married to Jill, or clarifies that his "hypothetical" doubts aren't real. I actually feel bad for her, if she's smart enough to read between the lines! Also, his throwaway sentiment about not being sure sure his mom would be alive when they came back from their honeymoon tells me all I need to know about why he rushed to marry her. If she died, he'd literally only have one relative, which means even more considering that Cathy is adopted. Marrying Jill asap and having a baby sounded a lot better than that. If he weren't such an asshole, I'd feel sorry for him, but I do think he needs to get out. Even as a Christian, he should see how he was vulnerable, and basically tricked by the duggars into such a quick marriage, just for a tv show. That shouldn't sentence Derick and Jill to a miserable life. 

Do I really want to read Derrick’s post? Still deciding. 

 

But I agree with you- if Derrick wasn’t such a hateful person I would understand why he rushed to marry Jill. He had been out in the world a few years and hadn’t met anyone, he was young and interested in partnered sex. His father was deceased relatively young, his mother was sick and SHE had lost both of her parents by 21 (she seems to have a nice relationship with her step mom but still). I’m sure as a MOTHER Cathy was afraid if she left this earth her boys would be all alone. It probably made her feel better to know that Derrick would have a wife and in laws if she didn’t make it. 

All that being said Derrick is still a dipshit, and I think Jill deserves better. Jill would actually be nice and kind to her husband if he showed her the tiniest bit of interest. I 100% believe Derrick has a mean streak I don’t see in any of the other in laws besides Lauren. I wouldn’t want to have to live with him. 

[JoanArc]

Shorter Derick: If you think I pissed away my 20's, just wait until you see what I do to my 30's!

[Christina87]

26 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Do I really want to read Derrick’s post? Still deciding. 

 

But I agree with you- if Derrick wasn’t such a hateful person I would understand why he rushed to marry Jill. He had been out in the world a few years and hadn’t met anyone, he was young and interested in partnered sex. His father was deceased relatively young, his mother was sick and SHE had lost both of her parents by 21 (she seems to have a nice relationship with her step mom but still). I’m sure as a MOTHER Cathy was afraid if she left this earth her boys would be all alone. It probably made her feel better to know that Derrick would have a wife and in laws if she didn’t make it. 

All that being said Derrick is still a dipshit, and I think Jill deserves better. Jill would actually be nice and kind to her husband if he showed her the tiniest bit of interest. I 100% believe Derrick has a mean streak I don’t see in any of the other in laws besides Lauren. I wouldn’t want to have to live with him. 

I agree, and Lauren can be annoying, and will no doubt make Si miserable, but she doesn't have a sense much power in their culture, as a woman. Si will never have to live by her decrees. She'll give him plenty of subtle digs, but Derick does much worse than that!

[ginger90]

For those who don’t want to click:

Confessions of a Christ-Seeking Millennial

Mar 20, 2019 | Life Matters | 1 

by Derick Dillard 

At the dawn of my 30s and sitting here on spring break, I find myself unusually reflective, yet equally focused on the future.  I haven’t been on “spring break” in nearly a decade, but ‘tis the life of a millennial in the midst of a newly-focused career trajectory.  I’m probably about as typical as you can be for one from my generation (sans the bad stereotypes), born right in the middle of the millennial generation, three days before the birth of the world wide web to be exact. Like many people who look back on their 20s, wondering where the time went and how life could change so fast, I want to briefly discuss some of my key takeaways from the past decade and how I’m anticipating the next.  

By far, the most important aspect of my life is my identity as a disciple of Jesus Christ.  Regardless of where I find myself in life, I pray that my Christian faith informs all that I think, say, and do.  People often think of the Christian life as something old and stuffy, but truth-be-told, I’ve experienced quite the opposite.  Doing my best to live for my creator has been an unexpected adventure thus far.  And before you think that “adventure” equates to continual bliss in a land of sunshine, puppies, and rainbows, it absolutely does not.  I certainly like puppies, but they might also increase your renter’s insurance.  I think about adventure as “calculated risk.”  Adventure might very well lead you to the toughest times of your life and try you to your core.  You can think about and plan something all you want, but eventually you just have to jump and trust that God knows what he’s doing.  I still suffer from a certain degree of “analysis paralysis” from time to time, but one thing I’ve learned is that I don’t always have to have all the answers, but I do need to trust my God who does.  I know it’s a trite and cliché saying, but it’s absolutely true and a foundational principle of the Christian faith.  Faith requires us to swallow our pride and forces us to come to terms with the fact that we are finite beings, who are not owed the capacity to comprehend all the mysteries of life and the universe.  However, it is magnificent to catch glimpses of these on occasion, as I live in personal relationship with the one who has saved me from myself and who continues to show me what true pleasure is.

Ten years ago this week, I was playing my trumpet at the Big XII basketball tournament in Kansas City as part of the OSU spirit band. Some of the riskiest things I’ve done since then include, but aren’t limited to (not necessarily in order of importance or riskiness): 

trying out for the role as “Pistol Pete” OSU’s mascot (formerly held by my dad who had passed away 15 months earlier), after failing the year before; 

working like crazy and applying for every scholarship under the sun in order to stay out of the ridiculous student loan crisis, while still going to my dream school, out-of-state

moving to Nepal for two years, having never traveled internationally (sorry, but I don’t count boy scout float trips in Canada as being a very international experience  

falling in love and marrying my best friend when neither of us knew whether my mom would be alive when we arrived back from our honeymoon;

bringing kids into this crazy world;

changing a diaper;

moving my family to Central America so that we could serve in one of the most murderous countries in the world 

going back to school, 8 years since being in a classroom;

and numerous unmentionables, which can only be heard over a cold frosty (so says one of my professors);

Regarding the big transitions and difficult choices that most millennials face (e.g. relationships, careers, and kids), many may suffer from the same “analysis paralysis” that I used to struggle with, but eventually you just have to pull the trigger.  You’ve got to take a calculated risk and just jump, even when you don’t exactly know what will happen.  For example, one myth I hear going around in the Christian millennial world is this notion of “the one.”  Young singles expect to see the clouds part and hear the hallelujah chorus when they meet their soul mate, and if that hasn’t happened, then they believe that they must continue waiting for “the one.”  If you carry this thinking into married life, you may even question yourself about whether you passed up “the one” or should have waited a little longer because “the one” was just over the horizon.  If you’re married (to a Christian or not), “the one” is always going to be who you are married to.  My “one” is always Jill Michelle Dillard.  If you aren’t married, don’t wait for a perfect person because you’ll just die single.  Furthermore, you are never going to feel as “ready” as you think you need to be before embarking on the next adventure, whether that be with your career, starting a family, or otherwise.  Carpe Diem!

Looking back on my 20s, I’ve realized that the best thing to do is discern God’s leading (through prayer, the Bible, and counsel from those who do the same) in life and follow Him, rather than simply doing what feels most comfortable.  Looking to the future, I plan to continue approaching life with the same mindset – it’s proven to be a much more adventurous life than I could have ever planned.    

Photo by Emma Frances Logan on Unsplash

[Jynnan tonnix]

43 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

For those who don’t want to click:

Confessions of a Christ-Seeking Millennial

Mar 20, 2019 | Life Matters | 1 

by Derick Dillard 

At the dawn of my 30s and sitting here on spring break, I find myself unusually reflective, yet equally focused on the future.  I haven’t been on “spring break” in nearly a decade, but ‘tis the life of a millennial in the midst of a newly-focused career trajectory.  I’m probably about as typical as you can be for one from my generation (sans the bad stereotypes), born right in the middle of the millennial generation, three days before the birth of the world wide web to be exact. Like many people who look back on their 20s, wondering where the time went and how life could change so fast, I want to briefly discuss some of my key takeaways from the past decade and how I’m anticipating the next.  

By far, the most important aspect of my life is my identity as a disciple of Jesus Christ.  Regardless of where I find myself in life, I pray that my Christian faith informs all that I think, say, and do.  People often think of the Christian life as something old and stuffy, but truth-be-told, I’ve experienced quite the opposite.  Doing my best to live for my creator has been an unexpected adventure thus far.  And before you think that “adventure” equates to continual bliss in a land of sunshine, puppies, and rainbows, it absolutely does not.  I certainly like puppies, but they might also increase your renter’s insurance.  I think about adventure as “calculated risk.”  Adventure might very well lead you to the toughest times of your life and try you to your core.  You can think about and plan something all you want, but eventually you just have to jump and trust that God knows what he’s doing.  I still suffer from a certain degree of “analysis paralysis” from time to time, but one thing I’ve learned is that I don’t always have to have all the answers, but I do need to trust my God who does.  I know it’s a trite and cliché saying, but it’s absolutely true and a foundational principle of the Christian faith.  Faith requires us to swallow our pride and forces us to come to terms with the fact that we are finite beings, who are not owed the capacity to comprehend all the mysteries of life and the universe.  However, it is magnificent to catch glimpses of these on occasion, as I live in personal relationship with the one who has saved me from myself and who continues to show me what true pleasure is.

Ten years ago this week, I was playing my trumpet at the Big XII basketball tournament in Kansas City as part of the OSU spirit band. Some of the riskiest things I’ve done since then include, but aren’t limited to (not necessarily in order of importance or riskiness): 

trying out for the role as “Pistol Pete” OSU’s mascot (formerly held by my dad who had passed away 15 months earlier), after failing the year before; 

working like crazy and applying for every scholarship under the sun in order to stay out of the ridiculous student loan crisis, while still going to my dream school, out-of-state

moving to Nepal for two years, having never traveled internationally (sorry, but I don’t count boy scout float trips in Canada as being a very international experience  

falling in love and marrying my best friend when neither of us knew whether my mom would be alive when we arrived back from our honeymoon;

bringing kids into this crazy world;

changing a diaper;

moving my family to Central America so that we could serve in one of the most murderous countries in the world 

going back to school, 8 years since being in a classroom;

and numerous unmentionables, which can only be heard over a cold frosty (so says one of my professors);

Regarding the big transitions and difficult choices that most millennials face (e.g. relationships, careers, and kids), many may suffer from the same “analysis paralysis” that I used to struggle with, but eventually you just have to pull the trigger.  You’ve got to take a calculated risk and just jump, even when you don’t exactly know what will happen.  For example, one myth I hear going around in the Christian millennial d is this notion of “the one.”  Young singles expect to see the clouds part and hear the hallelujah chorus when they meet their soul mate, and if that hasn’t happened, then they believe that they must continue waiting for “the one.”  If you carry this thinking into married life, you may even question yourself about whether you passed up “the one” or should have waited a little longer because “the one” was just over the horizon.  If you’re married (to a Christian or not), “the one” is always going to be who you are married to.  My “one” is always Jill Michelle Dillard.  If you aren’t married, don’t wait for a perfect person because you’ll just die single.  Furthermore, you are never going to feel as “ready” as you think you need to be before embarking on the next adventure, whether that be with your career, starting a family, or otherwise.  Carpe Diem!

Looking back on my 20s, I’ve realized that the best thing to do is discern God’s leading (through prayer, the Bible, and counsel from those who do the same) in life and follow Him, rather than simply doing what feels most comfortable.  Looking to the future, I plan to continue approaching life with the same mindset – it’s proven to be a much more adventurous life than I could have ever planned.    

Photo by Emma Frances Logan on Unsplash

Interesting that he concedes that Jill is not the perfect person. I mean, I actually agree with him on this one point; that if you wait for the clouds to part and hear the hallelujah chorus when you meat your "soul mate", you are likely to wait forever (or, though he doesn't include this part, you will jump headlong into a huge mistake because lust can be an even stronger impetus than love when those hormones get agitated). There's no way to be sure, IMO, after knowing someone for a couple of months, how long that glow is gonna last.

But, in any case, he does concede that Jill is not perfect, but seems determined to continue to see her as "the one" forever, which I can't actually fault him for either...Given that no matter how well we might know someone before marriage, there are bound to be differences, rocks and hurdles in the relationship, and bailing the moment you hit the first of them is never a good answer. The issue, though, is how do you determine where the line is between making a marriage work and giving up the moment you hit a bump? Are you putting the effort into a relationship because, at heart, you care about and value each other, and understand that neither of you is perfect, so life is going to mean a series of compromises and forgiveness for little things? Or are you stubbornly holding fast while both of you are miserable, because the entire thing was one big mistake from day one which you only realized after you actually spent more than a minute alone with each other without parents or "chaperones" listening in? I suppose we will never know. 

So, overall, aside from that first major misstep with the "sans the bad stereotypes", I don't actually hate this post as much as I have much of what he has said otherwise. It does feel, at least a little bit, as though he's seeing a little bit of reality. 

I wonder how Jill will react when she finds out that she is not perfect? She still seems to be trying to make that trope (I first typed "tripe", which might have been even more fitting!) work from her point of view of the "besthubbyever!!!11!)

Edited March 20, 2019 by Jynnan tonnix

[ginger90]

44 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

falling in love and marrying my best friend when neither of us knew whether my mom would be alive when we arrived back from our honeymoon;

I don’t even know how to explain the way this makes me feel about the two of them.

[emma675]

Quote

 I’m probably about as typical as you can be for one from my generation (sans the bad stereotypes)

1. WTF does this mean? He is so far from what I think of a typical millennial that it's not even funny.

2. If I were Jill, I'd be pissed. He's basically saying she isn't his soul mate (i.e. the love of his life) but he's stuck with her until he dies because they got married. 

If he wasn't such an asshole I'd feel sorry for him. 

[Ohiopirate02]

48 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

For those who don’t want to click:

Confessions of a Christ-Seeking Millennial

Mar 20, 2019 | Life Matters | 1 

by Derick Dillard 

At the dawn of my 30s and sitting here on spring break, I find myself unusually reflective, yet equally focused on the future.  I haven’t been on “spring break” in nearly a decade, but ‘tis the life of a millennial in the midst of a newly-focused career trajectory.  I’m probably about as typical as you can be for one from my generation (sans the bad stereotypes), born right in the middle of the millennial generation, three days before the birth of the world wide web to be exact. Like many people who look back on their 20s, wondering where the time went and how life could change so fast, I want to briefly discuss some of my key takeaways from the past decade and how I’m anticipating the next.  

By far, the most important aspect of my life is my identity as a disciple of Jesus Christ.  Regardless of where I find myself in life, I pray that my Christian faith informs all that I think, say, and do.  People often think of the Christian life as something old and stuffy, but truth-be-told, I’ve experienced quite the opposite.  Doing my best to live for my creator has been an unexpected adventure thus far.  And before you think that “adventure” equates to continual bliss in a land of sunshine, puppies, and rainbows, it absolutely does not.  I certainly like puppies, but they might also increase your renter’s insurance.  I think about adventure as “calculated risk.”  Adventure might very well lead you to the toughest times of your life and try you to your core.  You can think about and plan something all you want, but eventually you just have to jump and trust that God knows what he’s doing.  I still suffer from a certain degree of “analysis paralysis” from time to time, but one thing I’ve learned is that I don’t always have to have all the answers, but I do need to trust my God who does.  I know it’s a trite and cliché saying, but it’s absolutely true and a foundational principle of the Christian faith.  Faith requires us to swallow our pride and forces us to come to terms with the fact that we are finite beings, who are not owed the capacity to comprehend all the mysteries of life and the universe.  However, it is magnificent to catch glimpses of these on occasion, as I live in personal relationship with the one who has saved me from myself and who continues to show me what true pleasure is.

Ten years ago this week, I was playing my trumpet at the Big XII basketball tournament in Kansas City as part of the OSU spirit band. Some of the riskiest things I’ve done since then include, but aren’t limited to (not necessarily in order of importance or riskiness): 

trying out for the role as “Pistol Pete” OSU’s mascot (formerly held by my dad who had passed away 15 months earlier), after failing the year before; 

working like crazy and applying for every scholarship under the sun in order to stay out of the ridiculous student loan crisis, while still going to my dream school, out-of-state

moving to Nepal for two years, having never traveled internationally (sorry, but I don’t count boy scout float trips in Canada as being a very international experience  

falling in love and marrying my best friend when neither of us knew whether my mom would be alive when we arrived back from our honeymoon;

bringing kids into this crazy world;

changing a diaper;

moving my family to Central America so that we could serve in one of the most murderous countries in the world 

going back to school, 8 years since being in a classroom;

and numerous unmentionables, which can only be heard over a cold frosty (so says one of my professors);

Regarding the big transitions and difficult choices that most millennials face (e.g. relationships, careers, and kids), many may suffer from the same “analysis paralysis” that I used to struggle with, but eventually you just have to pull the trigger.  You’ve got to take a calculated risk and just jump, even when you don’t exactly know what will happen.  For example, one myth I hear going around in the Christian millennial world is this notion of “the one.”  Young singles expect to see the clouds part and hear the hallelujah chorus when they meet their soul mate, and if that hasn’t happened, then they believe that they must continue waiting for “the one.”  If you carry this thinking into married life, you may even question yourself about whether you passed up “the one” or should have waited a little longer because “the one” was just over the horizon.  If you’re married (to a Christian or not), “the one” is always going to be who you are married to.  My “one” is always Jill Michelle Dillard.  If you aren’t married, don’t wait for a perfect person because you’ll just die single.  Furthermore, you are never going to feel as “ready” as you think you need to be before embarking on the next adventure, whether that be with your career, starting a family, or otherwise.  Carpe Diem!

Looking back on my 20s, I’ve realized that the best thing to do is discern God’s leading (through prayer, the Bible, and counsel from those who do the same) in life and follow Him, rather than simply doing what feels most comfortable.  Looking to the future, I plan to continue approaching life with the same mindset – it’s proven to be a much more adventurous life than I could have ever planned.    

Photo by Emma Frances Logan on Unsplash

I have a few thoughts on the bolded parts--

1. The wording of this will make some of the leghumpers think that Dreck's dad was Pistol Pete until he died.  He should have worded this better.

2.  It's great that he was able to get an undergrad degree without student loans, but no way he is not taking some out for law school.  I know we have discussed this before, but with Jill not working he has to be taking out a massive amount of loans for the family to survive.

3. Again he words things in a way for the leghumpers to believe their lives were in constant danger while in El Salvador instead of in a guarded compound.

4.  Derick you don't scare me.  I'm not going to settle for Mr. Right Now just to have somebody.  I would rather die single than marry anyone like him or any of the males in the Duggar Realm.  He needs to STFU about this, dying single is not the worst thing in the world.

[Jynnan tonnix]

2 minutes ago, emma675 said:

1. WTF does this mean? He is so far from what I think of a typical millennial that it's not even funny.

2. If I were Jill, I'd be pissed. He's basically saying she isn't his soul mate (i.e. the love of his life) but he's stuck with her until he dies because they got married. 

If he wasn't such an asshole I'd feel sorry for him. 

As I was just saying (and apologies for stating it so soon after my last post, but I might not have worded it right), I don't think what he said was necessarily a bad thing...there are plenty (probably the majority) of marriages out there which are not fairytale-blissful unions of absolute soulmates. I'm in one myself. 

Mr Jyn and I agree that neither of us is anything close to perfect, and that putting up with each other has, and continues to be, a trial at times. It's just the way life is. Could we have found better matches? Who knows? Quite possibly. Or maybe not. But it's been 34 years, and, overall, the good has outweighed the bad. Isn't that all anyone really needs out of life?

[BigBingerBro]

Talk about a big pile of humble-brag mixed with poorly executed dad-jokes, I need to take a long cleansing shower after reading that.

I'm surprised that his list didn't include "becoming a TeeVee star" (which indirectly funded and/or allowed for some of the other things to happen)- of course we all do know why that was not mentioned.

Edited March 20, 2019 by BigBingerBro

[BradandJanet]

Well, it's Derick's blog, so it's all about Derick. It's probably always all about Derick, so there's no reason to listen to him. 

His writing shows a decent display of surface literacy (unlike another celebrity-in-his-own-mind-advice-spewer to the millennials, Jeremy Roloff). I wonder what it's like for Derick to be yoked to SOTDRT graduate Jilly and her calculating parents. God has a wicked sense of humor. 

[Zella]

Lordy, I guess turning 30 has made him a philosopher. I turn 30 later this year. Maybe I'll subject you all to my wisdom in a lengthy humble-brag blog post to celebrate. 

[Pingaponga]

On 3/18/2019 at 12:53 PM, ginger90 said:

10 chicken breasts, cooked, cubed

1 (10 oz.) frozen mixed veggies OR broccoli, cooked 

2 t. poppy seeds

Boil chicken and season how you like (reserve 1/2 C. broth).

Why does she want me to boil the cooked chicken? What did chicken ever do to her?

[beckie]

I'm sure Jill read and 100% approved his post. Just like I'm also sure it 100% went woosh, so far over her head that she felt the breeze and had no idea why.

[Oldernowiser]

Um...did anyone ASK? JFC, if he was half as fascinating as he thinks he is, that’s still ten times as fascinating as he really is.

So, to summarize:

I am All That.

My wife isn’t.

The End.

(If I were Jill I’d be pissed. But my guess is she pretended to read it, simpered at her headship and resumed staring at the fluffy clouds that live in her head.

Edited March 20, 2019 by Oldernowiser

[Scarlett45]

4 hours ago, Christina87 said:

I agree, and Lauren can be annoying, and will no doubt make Si miserable, but she doesn't have a sense much power in their culture, as a woman. Si will never have to live by her decrees. She'll give him plenty of subtle digs, but Derick does much worse than that!

This is true. 

[Scarlett45]

2 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

As I was just saying (and apologies for stating it so soon after my last post, but I might not have worded it right), I don't think what he said was necessarily a bad thing...there are plenty (probably the majority) of marriages out there which are not fairytale-blissful unions of absolute soulmates. I'm in one myself. 

Mr Jyn and I agree that neither of us is anything close to perfect, and that putting up with each other has, and continues to be, a trial at times. It's just the way life is. Could we have found better matches? Who knows? Quite possibly. Or maybe not. But it's been 34 years, and, overall, the good has outweighed the bad. Isn't that all anyone really needs out of life?

I think that’s very different than how Derrick talks about Jill. Firstly, you’ve noticed how you are quick to say what a great man your husband is and how lucky you are to have him- I’ve never seen Derrick show any kind of appreciation like that towards Jill. I don’t think anyone expects their spouse to be perfect or have only moments of bliss, but thinking they are a good person and good for you is expected.

Secondly they have been married a hot minute, if he feels this way now will he be growling at her in 34years????

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

But, in any case, he does concede that Jill is not perfect, but seems determined to continue to see her as "the one" forever, which I can't actually fault him for either...Given that no matter how well we might know someone before marriage, there are bound to be differences, rocks and hurdles in the relationship, and bailing the moment you hit the first of them is never a good answer. The issue, though, is how do you determine where the line is between making a marriage work and giving up the moment you hit a bump? Are you putting the effort into a relationship because, at heart, you care about and value each other, and understand that neither of you is perfect, so life is going to mean a series of compromises and forgiveness for little things? Or are you stubbornly holding fast while both of you are miserable, because the entire thing was one big mistake from day one which you only realized after you actually spent more than a minute alone with each other without parents or "chaperones" listening in? I suppose we will never know. 

I think people have to know what they want out their marriage. If you want romantic attraction and emotional intimacy- yeah if things are really bad maybe throw in the towel. If you want is companionship, partnered sex, financial support, domestic support- then yes I think people should stick it out because they made a commitment (of course absent things like abuse or criminal behavior). But the problem with the Gothard way of doing things in my mind is they ACT like people are getting married because of romantic love, rather than a modern arranged marriage-I know several people in modern arranged marriage, adults with educations who knew what they were getting into and actually married for mutually agreed upon reasons. This was not the Dillards.

[DangerousMinds]

6 hours ago, dariafan said:

She knows lying is a sin, right?

Ditto for Jessa!

[Christina87]

I think it's also a problem that Jill and the duggars talk nonstop about "the one God has for me." Isn't that the whole point of courtship, to divine whether God has chosen for you two to be soulmates? If I believed that, and then read what Derick said, that many, many other girls could have taken Jill's place, and maybe they weren't destined to be together...I'd be heartbroken!

[DangerousMinds]

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Interesting that he concedes that Jill is not the perfect person. I mean, I actually agree with him on this one point; that if you wait for the clouds to part and hear the hallelujah chorus when you meat your "soul mate", you are likely to wait forever (or, though he doesn't include this part, you will jump headlong into a huge mistake because lust can be an even stronger impetus than love when those hormones get agitated). There's no way to be sure, IMO, after knowing someone for a couple of months, how long that glow is gonna last.

But, in any case, he does concede that Jill is not perfect, but seems determined to continue to see her as "the one" forever, which I can't actually fault him for either...Given that no matter how well we might know someone before marriage, there are bound to be differences, rocks and hurdles in the relationship, and bailing the moment you hit the first of them is never a good answer. The issue, though, is how do you determine where the line is between making a marriage work and giving up the moment you hit a bump? Are you putting the effort into a relationship because, at heart, you care about and value each other, and understand that neither of you is perfect, so life is going to mean a series of compromises and forgiveness for little things? Or are you stubbornly holding fast while both of you are miserable, because the entire thing was one big mistake from day one which you only realized after you actually spent more than a minute alone with each other without parents or "chaperones" listening in? I suppose we will never know. 

So, overall, aside from that first major misstep with the "sans the bad stereotypes", I don't actually hate this post as much as I have much of what he has said otherwise. It does feel, at least a little bit, as though he's seeing a little bit of reality. 

I wonder how Jill will react when she finds out that she is not perfect? She still seems to be trying to make that trope (I first typed "tripe", which might have been even more fitting!) work from her point of view of the "besthubbyever!!!11!)

I think most people wait longer than just a couple months to marry, giving them more time to know the person. And many also live together before marriage, so there aren’t as many big surprises.

[Lukeysboat]

So Jill was “waiting for Prince Charming” (her favorite book—right?), the man God had chosen for her, while Derick was willing to settle because there is no such thing as “the one.”

Wow. If my husband wrote what Derick did but about me, I would be crushed. Thankfully we did have all of those wonderful feelings that Derek dismissed and I did marry the love of my life.

[Scarlett45]

8 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

I think it's also a problem that Jill and the duggars talk nonstop about "the one God has for me." Isn't that the whole point of courtship, to divine whether God has chosen for you two to be soulmates? If I believed that, and then read what Derick said, that many, many other girls could have taken Jill's place, and maybe they weren't destined to be together...I'd be heartbroken!

Yes! Derrick didn’t say what a good wife he has in Jill or how she’s enriched his life even though marriage is hard, he said to young Christians reading his post “settle on the first person that comes along who is Christian or you’ll die alone.”  

[ginger90]

They also pray for the perfect wedding dresses.