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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


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14 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I figure that they must have used a giftcard to Coldstone.  I love ice cream, but Coldstone is expensive and I rarely go there.  If all 4 of them got ice cream, then their total would be around $25 which is a lot for a family with no visible income.

I figured they must have used a coupon at Coldstone.  Our paper has them all of the time, especially 2 for $5.  I'm Jill just got ice cream for her and Derick since she's supposed to show how much she cares for him and the kids just got some spoonfuls.

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8 hours ago, Temperance said:

I can't. 

There's a screenshot of Jill replying to someone on Twitter? Instagram? (not sure). She says something to the effect of she loves sex.  It's floating around the internet if you care to look for it. I wouldn't be surprised if Jill is the one who initiates a lot of their intimacy. 

The “love sex” comment is from her IG.  If you’re looking for something to kill time with today, scroll through the remarks on her IG.  It’s pretty evenly split between those who think she’s a nutcase and those who think she’s wonderful.  There are a lot of Kool-Aid drinkers in the world.

7 hours ago, Temperance said:

@Lunera Is that from Instagram or Twitter or something else?

IG

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I have probably said this before, but it bears repeating: Jill literally owns one pair of denim shorts, and they are awful!  I literally LOL every time they show up in a new photo.

I am so tempted to contact Jill and ask if she and Derick know about Bitmojis. Not even kidding! Mr. Portia and I carry out a good deal of foreplay using suggestive Bitmojis. And if one of us is traveling? Look out.

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On ‎5‎/‎12‎/‎2019 at 2:36 PM, sixlets said:

Phantom Quote Box.

"Cathy is the mother of two happily married sons. Derick is married to Jill and together they have two sons, Israel and Samuel! Dan and his wife Deena are faithful in serving their church and community. Cathy loves every moment she gets to spend with them and her grandson."

I wonder which grandson she doesn't love spending time with?

Philippians 2:3-4 3 - Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. AKA - No orgasms for you!

"Remember, your husband is not your dad."

Or your brother.

I looked up "Intended For Pleasure" by Ed Wheat and from one of the reviews, "We then move into some terrible medical advice such as using a tampon to control the 'mess' from sex (incredibly dangerous practice that could cause toxic shock) and some other outdated nonsense" to which I say, seriously, WtF!?!

Finally, I have another piece of advice Jilly Muffin might find incredibly useful - Before your husband gets home from "work" lock the kids in their rooms, get naked and wrap yourself in clingy wrap, and greet  your hubby at the door. Just be careful you don't lose control and bound out into the driveway to tackle him before he reaches the door. Think of the neighbors and how many marriages (and appetites) you would ruin!

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18 minutes ago, TresGatos said:

Finally, I have another piece of advice Jilly Muffin might find incredibly useful - Before your husband gets home from "work" lock the kids in their rooms, get naked and wrap yourself in clingy wrap, and greet  your hubby at the door. Just be careful you don't lose control and bound out into the driveway to tackle him before he reaches the door. Think of the neighbors and how many marriages (and appetites) you would ruin!

Well, she could mow the lawn...

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12 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Well  I can only assume that it’s thanks to Jill and her buying lingerie online advice, but the ads I see on this page have changed from cheap-ass oversized clothing to cheap-ass sleazy lingerie that I do NOT need to be looking at.

I also got the ugly ads for oversized clothes and now I'm getting"sexy" girdle things!

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(edited)
52 minutes ago, TresGatos said:

"Cathy is the mother of two happily married sons. Derick is married to Jill and together they have two sons, Israel and Samuel! Dan and his wife Deena are faithful in serving their church and community. Cathy loves every moment she gets to spend with them and her grandson."

I wonder which grandson she doesn't love spending time with?

I looked up "Intended For Pleasure" by Ed Wheat and from one of the reviews, "We then move into some terrible medical advice such as using a tampon to control the 'mess' from sex (incredibly dangerous practice that could cause toxic shock) and some other outdated nonsense" to which I say, seriously, WtF!?!

WTF?? What "mess"? Not having the book at my disposal to figure out the context, I'm assuming that for some reason the book is suggesting tampons during sex. The only thing that would accomplish (other than the aforementioned risks for toxic shock) would be to sop up any natural lubricant the woman produced, which would only lead to sandpaper sex. It couldn't possibly mean any "mess" produced by the guy since he would obviously be taking care not to spill any seed where it didn't righteously belong 🙄

Though wouldn't it also form a barrier to at least some percentage of his little swimmers?

I can only think that I'm somehow misinterpreting that bit of advice since it makes no sense on any level whatsoever.

Edited by Jynnan tonnix
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3 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

WTF?? What "mess"? Not having the book at my disposal to figure out the context, I'm assuming that for some reason the book is suggesting tampons during sex. The only thing that would accomplish (other than the aforementioned risks for toxic shock) would be to sop up any natural lubricant the woman produced, which would only lead to sandpaper sex. It couldn't possibly mean any "mess" produced by the guy since he would obviously be taking care not to spill any seed where it didn't righteously belong 🙄

Though wouldn't it also form a barrier to at least some percentage of his little swimmers?

I can only think that I'm somehow misinterpreting that bit of advice since it makes no sense on any level whatsoever.

I assumed the tampon was to prevent post-coital leakage, not to be used as a barrier method. 🤷‍♀️

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm assuming tampons are considered to be bad amongst this group as the ONLY things to ever enter a vagina should be the husband's penis and the babies that result. 

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29 minutes ago, mimionthebeach said:

I assumed the tampon was to prevent post-coital leakage, not to be used as a barrier method. 🤷‍♀️

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm assuming tampons are considered to be bad amongst this group as the ONLY things to ever enter a vagina should be the husband's penis and the babies that result. 

That's what I meant - that it made no sense for them to be using something which might prove to be any sort of barrier whatsoever when they are so adamantly against wasting any sperm. And I think I've seen that same sentiment you mention about tampons not belonging in there either.

But the decrease in available lubrication still seems like an awfully high price to pay for slightly less leakage. I wouldn't think a tampon would really trap all that much in any case.

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1 hour ago, Oldernowiser said:

Other than my huge dislike of TMI (especially from a cult that yammers on about modesty and eye traps), I think this is what really frosts me: Jill, talk down to me when you’ve been married for a few decades and when you’ve actually been through some life. YOU.DON’T.KNOW.ANYTHING.

The sad thing is Jill has dealt with some shit, but she wants to act like those things never happened.  I do feel that if Jill was ever to do some self-reflection and write honestly about her upbringing, Josh's violation of her and their parent's subsequent cover-up, her failed move to Central America and her two disastrous births she would be able to publish a successful book about this.  But she lives in denial about these things and keeps on doubling down on "keeping sweet" to the point that all but the leg-humpers know she is being dishonest.  She has the fanbase that a memoir would do well, and then that could lead to speaking engagements.  If she got an agent and a good editor, they would help to polish her up.  Derick can continue with law school while she works on this, and I do believe that this would help their marriage.  

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1 hour ago, mimionthebeach said:

I assumed the tampon was to prevent post-coital leakage, not to be used as a barrier method. 🤷‍♀️

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm assuming tampons are considered to be bad amongst this group as the ONLY things to ever enter a vagina should be the husband's penis and the babies that result. 

Got to do everything to make that baby! 

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11 hours ago, Temperance said:

@Lunera Is that from Instagram or Twitter or something else?

It's on her Instagram. She answered a few other questions and told people to seek therapists for help. As if she and Derdick can even afford one.

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I'm working at keeping my gag reflex at bay, but didn't Jill claim they would do nothing to prevent pregnancy? And if Jill and the creep are having unprotected sex at least 3 -4 times a week, then surely there is something wrong with their fertility. As usual nothing they say or do adds up.

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1 hour ago, Lunera said:
Enews picked up the story. The comments are hilarious. 

So now Jill is out there bragging about her sex life and talking up lotions and sexy underwear.*

Congratulations, JimBob and Michelle! You’re the proud parents of a Kardashian!

* I will remain forever grateful that she has not chosen to model her lingerie online. But it would not surprise me, either.

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(edited)

Ok, I'm going to be honest...ready?

I think those two are freaky and Jill loves every minute of it. 

Jill, these emojis?  

🍑🍆

Edited by Marigold
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1 hour ago, Suzn said:

I'm working at keeping my gag reflex at bay, but didn't Jill claim they would do nothing to prevent pregnancy? And if Jill and the creep are having unprotected sex at least 3 -4 times a week, then surely there is something wrong with their fertility. As usual nothing they say or do adds up.

Could be connected to the speculation surrounding Sam's birth, that Jill can't have anymore kids. 

On the one hand, Jill or any fundie talking about sex is TMI, but on the other hand...Jill's behavior is just something that I would not ever, ever imagine a Maxwell writing about on their blog, for example. She's not a typical fundie in that sense. She's like a liberal free spirit born into a religiously conservative family and she hasn't really been authentic with herself. 

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Still picking at this and need to comment on the strange wording Jill used here:

"And when you may not be able to actually have intercourse for a period of time or for health issues" 

She writes "for a period of time or for health issues" - how is that a place to use "or"?

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6 hours ago, TresGatos said:

"Cathy is the mother of two happily married sons. Derick is married to Jill and together they have two sons, Israel and Samuel! Dan and his wife Deena are faithful in serving their church and community. Cathy loves every moment she gets to spend with them and her grandson."

This is poorly written. Deena and Dan have one son. It’s that grandson this is referring to.

1 picture, 1 video:

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7 minutes ago, Suzn said:

Still picking at this and need to comment on the strange wording Jill used here:

"And when you may not be able to actually have intercourse for a period of time or for health issues" 

She writes "for a period of time or for health issues" - how is that a place to use "or"?

I think she's differentiating one's period vs. no sex after childbirth, etc.

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4 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

Got to do everything to make that baby! 

🤮🤢

2 hours ago, Suzn said:

I'm working at keeping my gag reflex at bay, but didn't Jill claim they would do nothing to prevent pregnancy? And if Jill and the creep are having unprotected sex at least 3 -4 times a week, then surely there is something wrong with their fertility. As usual nothing they say or do adds up.

I doubt these two are doing it more than a few times a year.

I do feel a bit sorry for Jill she clearly thinks she’s gotta be perfect and no one is. She must feel a lot of pressure If this advice is what she really thinks, I just wonder what goes on in this girls head. 

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Didn’t the siblings say in one of the Q&A shows that the most prolifent PDA couple was Jill & Derick and we all thought they were crazy?  I also seem to remember Jill saying she had a lot of urges and had trouble dealing with them before she got married.  I think they are probably all over each other 25/8 and have a healthy active sex life, kids be damned.

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36 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

I think she's differentiating one's period vs. no sex after childbirth, etc.

I understand what she means, I'm just noting word usage.  The phrase is not an either/or situation.

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1 hour ago, Gweilo said:

At least Jill uses the actual word "sex" rather than that weird sandwich metaphor that her parents use.

I was honestly shocked and impressed when I saw that. 

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37 minutes ago, Saylii said:

Didn’t the siblings say in one of the Q&A shows that the most prolifent PDA couple was Jill & Derick and we all thought they were crazy?  I also seem to remember Jill saying she had a lot of urges and had trouble dealing with them before she got married.  I think they are probably all over each other 25/8 and have a healthy active sex life, kids be damned.

Yes, that's mostly why I have no problem believing that she enjoys sex and has it often. She was horny as fuck and was blatant about her excitement over finally getting to have sex. At one point the producer asked Jim Bob, "What do you think Jill's most excited about getting married?" And creepy asshole that he is, JB gave a knowing laugh. 

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6 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

I can only think that I'm somehow misinterpreting that bit of advice since it makes no sense on any level whatsoever.

From his book:

Let’s start with a quote from Dr. Wheat’s book: “At the time of first intercourse, the husband should not persist in striving to bring his wife to orgasm with his penis in the vagina. If she has some soreness, there is no reason to make this worse. After the penis is inserted, the husband should have his orgasm quickly*, withdraw the penis, and stimulate his wife’s clitoral area gently with his fingers to bring her to orgasm” (p. 53).

Very quickly in Derwood's case.

1 hour ago, MsJamieDornan said:

"Local Woman Has Desperate Sex With Homeless Man"

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28 minutes ago, QuinnInND said:

Eww. I have 2 toddlers and my floor never looked like that. 

How do you manage to get your toddlers to not crumble and throw food all over the floor with gay abandon during mealtimes? Teach me your ways! 

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29 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Jill's post was TMI, but I'm strangely proud of her. First, for talking about sex in frank terms rather than Fundie-speak, and second for stealing the spotlight from Jessa. Who cares about baby #3, when a Fundie is giving seduction tips, advising on masturbation (Don't do it, it's evil!) and spilling the deets about her own bedroom antics. It's the most un-Duggarest thing ever. I'm willing to lose my lunch over the imagery so long as Boob's and Jessa's heads explode. 

I was just about to post this. Jill is an adult woman, if she wants to talk about her sexuality I respect that more than those awful recipes!!

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12 minutes ago, Gweilo said:

How do you manage to get your toddlers to not crumble and throw food all over the floor with gay abandon during mealtimes? Teach me your ways! 

Our floors were always nearly spotless.  Our family dog took care of that issue for us!  He absolutely loved both of our sons when they were small, and we always thought it was at least partially because he saw them as a great source of treats.

Not that I'm suggesting these two get a dog...

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19 minutes ago, Gweilo said:

How do you manage to get your toddlers to not crumble and throw food all over the floor with gay abandon during mealtimes? Teach me your ways! 

One doxie, and my MIL got us a couple mats for the floor to put under the high chairs. And they were fairly neat eaters. Still are. 

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1 minute ago, QuinnInND said:

One doxie, and my MIL got us a couple mats for the floor to put under the high chairs. And they were fairly neat eaters. Still are. 

Aah. We're not animal people so won't be going the dog route and yeah drop cloths work but ultimately I'm going to be sweeping the floor after every meal anyway. I'm going to assume Jill will sweep after that child gets out of the chair. (Wishful thinking?)

Hopefully the photo means that Jill and Derick don't beat their children for making a mess at mealtimes. I suspect the Maxwell family do.

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I can believe Jill is horny, but I just don't see it with Derick. He seems like a cold fish if I have ever seen one lol. I could see Jill giving this "advice" to make it look like she is having sex, and also pointing out what a good wife she is...because if Derick ever did want sex, she would be down! I was in a sexless relationship once (sorry if TMI lol!) and I get the exact same vibe from Derick. I could totally be wrong, but it's just a hunch. I could see him refusing sex on the guise of birth control. 

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7 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

I can believe Jill is horny, but I just don't see it with Derick. He seems like a cold fish if I have ever seen one lol. I could see Jill giving this "advice" to make it look like she is having sex, and also pointing out what a good wife she is...because if Derick ever did want sex, she would be down! I was in a sexless relationship once (sorry if TMI lol!) and I get the exact same vibe from Derick. I could totally be wrong, but it's just a hunch. I could see him refusing sex on the guise of birth control. 

I get the same vibe from Derick.  I just don't think that sex is that high of a priority for him once the honeymoon phase was over.  

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(edited)
2 hours ago, Gweilo said:

At least Jill uses the actual word "sex" rather than that weird sandwich metaphor that her parents use.

Actually the "sandwich metaphor" is something the snarkers use. What Michelle said was "anyone can make him a sandwich, but only the woman/you/she can be there for his/the husband's special need for intimacy or his one special need."  She said this multiple times and the phrasing changed a little each time. However the term she used for sex was "need". Either his "one special need"or "need for intimacy". 

Sandwich making was never a euphemism by Michelle. The point was anyone can satisfy the nonsexual needs a man has like ironing his shirt, or making him a sandwich, but only the wife can fulfill his need for intimacy. The snarkers used "sandwich making" as a euphemism. 

JB has used to use "working on #20" as euphemism for sex on 19 K&C.

Edited by Temperance
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