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S07.E09: White Christmas


Artsda

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In an effort to have the picture-perfect white Christmas she's always dreamed of, Gloria rents a cabin in the mountains for the whole family to celebrate the holiday. Unfortunately, when they arrive, there are some unexpected factors like the weather and an eccentric random guest, who is already staying in the cabin. 

 

What a cop out having Beth cheating on Andy also, way to throw it on her to make him and Haley appear innocent and not that bad. I still can't stand him and dislike them even more so as a couple now. 

 

Claire as the head of the company? Its going to go down the drain, they've showed nothing since she started at Jay's office to show her competent to run things. 

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Artsda, completely agree. With both. Jay must have no idea that the employees have absolutely no respect for Claire. His company will be going out of business soon enough and selling their copier for $7 too.

 

I did like that we got to see a bit more of Alex & they gave her something (although very little) to do. Wow, Lily has certainly matured since we last saw her. I didn't like her at first (although I've always preferred her to the first Lily they had, that very unhappy baby), but I've grown to like her delivery.

 

I think Nolan is struggling with his growing body. He looks very uncomfortable in it & his arms hang very apelike. I feel sorry for the kid having to grow up in front of an audience.

 

The only chuckle I got (and it was a mild one) was the flashback of Mitch & Cam singing Christmas carols last Christmas and Mitch flinging off his shirt/sweater to "don we now our gay apparel."

Edited by kat165
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Okay, The Shining homage with Lily on the Big Wheel made me laugh.

 

I'm glad Gloria called Andy a "Utah 7". I like him but it's unbelievable that a guy like that  could pull both Hayley AND Beth!

 

First Catherine O'Hara last week and now Andrea Martin? As an SCTV fan I'm pleased. 

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Okay, The Shining homage with Lily on the Big Wheel made me laugh.

 

First Catherine O'Hara last week and now Andrea Martin? As an SCTV fan I'm pleased. 

I *loved* the shoutout to The Shining, which seemed to come out of nowhere!  The boys as the twins was very well done.  And if only they had added Andrea Martin on a typewriter and Phil breaking through a door with an axe. 

 

And I'm glad Phil told Andy exactly what posters here have been wanting -- make up your mind! 

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I loved seeing Andrea Martin again, and I'm glad she got a chance to do a little singing. I thought it was a nice touch seeing Alex connect with her, and then actually take a lesson after recognizing what her future could be. I was just sad that her attempts to fit in with the family were automatically assumed to be sarcastic by everyone else.

 

Andy and Beth belong together - let them run off together and cheat on each other forever after.

 

Dick move, Jay - even if your motives were well-meaning.

 

I hope we get some more visits from former SCTV folks - I'd especially love to see Rick Moranis and/or Dave Thomas drop in.

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I know it was set up all the way back at the beginning that Beth was a cheater, but even still I hate that they went there again.  I agree it was such a cop out and it was basically used as a way to let Andy and Hayley off the hook and make they seem justified in their actions.  Which, no.  I wanted to punch Andy when he was getting all self righteous about being cheated on.  Shut it.  You are no better.

 

Also while I appreciated Phil reaming Andy out, it was hard to totally enjoy it in the sense that I expect Phil will forgive him and be his best friend again the second he and Hayley start dating for real.

 

Claire?  Not only has Claire been depicted as incompetent in the workplace, but she's only worked there for a few years.  So after two or so years she's capable of taking over the company?  Don't buy that either.

 

Andrea Martin is always welcome on my television.  At least the family was together?  We found Lily so there's that.  I'd rather them give Lily more to do and make Luke and Manny take a backseat.   

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Eh. I agree with others, it's pretty crappy for Andy to not say also, "well, I cheated on you too" if she was just going to end up leaving anyway. But seriously, now it's all, what the hell was the point...of all of this? 

 

So, Claire is head of the company. I don't know, I don't think Jay is going to handle  being retired well. It just seems like he's not going to know what to do with himself.

 

Oh, Lily I love her, I'm glad she's been found. Not enough snark from her but now I realized how mean her dads kind of are, like, really, you won't let your daughter sing a christmas song with you? I'm starting to hate the "they need everything to be perfect but Lily wants to join but she's not good" joke. I don't find it funny, it kind of grates.

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It was lame that Hayley and Andy got a pass for cheating because unbeknownst to them Beth was? Uh, they still cheated. Well, these people are supposed to be like 22 or so and who gets married that young anymore? 

 

There were some funny bits like Mitch humping the piano in the flashback. I loved Claire laughing and videoing it. That is the the type of family moment that this show does well.

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Finally - an episode I enjoyed! Why?  Because the families were together, interacting with each other!  Thank you ABC.

 

I'm so over the Andy/Haley stuff, but since the writers seem determined to shove them down our collective throats, I'm overlooking it.  But Andy and Haley having sex and sneaking around etc. is just not Modern Family.  It's not what this show is about. 

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Jay's been working with Claire for quite a while. But he needs a dumb stunt to figure out how she really feels about the company? OK.

 

If anyone besides Alex knows the difference between Celsius and Fahrenheit, it would be Gloria, who grew up with Celsius. 

 

It's probably too much to hope for that this was Luke's exit from the show? 

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Weren't Andy and Beth waiting until marriage or am I mis-remembering? I thought that was what made him doing it with Haley unexpected....and if so, Beth certainly wasn't saving herself for marriage!

 

Did we know that Alex had such a beautiful voice-has she ever sung on the show before. I am not talking about the actress, I am talking about the character.

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Alex singing reminded me of her other job on the Disney cartoon, Sofia the First -- she sings there all the time.

 

I liked the farcical aspects of this one -- Mitch and Cam trying to sing -- plus "The Shining" visual gag was so clever. Also, the wordplay in the show from the sublime ("Are you F.N. Moore?" "You're F.N. right I am.") to the predictable, but funny ("Got wood, Andy?" -- Ty Burrell has the best comedic timing on the show). And Jay and Claire waxing poetic about closets will never not be funny.

 

As one of the few who don't mind Haley and Andy, I think this is a good way to get the actor off the show for a while. They need to figure out who they are without Beth in the middle. Haley needs to decide if she really likes Andy for Andy, or Andy because he was unavailable (she's basically Olivia Pope in this scenario) and Andy needs to decide if he can live with another "stone-cold 10" when he's just a "Utah 7" or will he always worry Haley is going to cheat on him, like Beth did. I basically predict small, intermittent doses of offscreen-ish angst until May sweeps.

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Yeah, I enjoyed the episode, and you can always win with Andrea Martin. The problem with Andy/Haley/Beth is that they completely wrote themselves into a corner with the storyline. I did read originally they wanted to introduce Beth early on but someone happened with the original actress and why they came up with the story of: "For 10 years they have been on again/off again." Then when they did recast her they got into this entire mess with Beth being jealous because someone else was interested in Andy when she loved the drama of playing him,  breaking up and then getting back together. But deciding that Beth would also be a cheater but having it so Andy goes: "But we've been dating for 10 years." Yeah, and you ended up cheating on her multiple times and why I loved that Phil was the one to tell him either be a man and do the right thing, or end this and move on. 

   Sad to say, I was engaged to a Beth myself who had an off again/on again with her high school boyfriend for 8 years before we ended up getting together for 2 years and were going to get married and then found out she had cheated on me 10 months before the wedding. I ended it but she left me in debt and emotionally messed up until I met Mrs. Readster. My ex ended up marrying her old boyfriend and had two girls but apparently they are going through trust issues now. So, when Beth said she had been with this other guy during her "off" time with Andy over the last 10 years. I was like: "Well, she is in for a big reality check." However, I'm not going to go: "Poor Andy" on this one. He knew how Beth was and to think during these times she was off and you can spin the entire Beth: "No one gets in the way of what is mine." Considering she broke up with him through texts and emails over the years that Andy has confirmed. You think he would have gotten the hint? Well, I will wish the writers good luck on this couple.

  As for Jay's  bait and switch with Claire, why have the writers even bothered showing how Claire can't do her job, the rest of the staff from low end to high end hate her and pretend if they ignore her, Claire will go away. If they would woven it in to Jay wanting to have Claire as the main VP and get the employees to respect her and then she could take over. Then I would have been all for it, but how many times has Jay gone with the entire: "If I tell the kids this, they will thank me later." It's backfired since the show started, the writers do love the characters never learning anything. Like with Haley constantly telling Alex she can't get a guy or dresses  bad. This was an Alex subplot that worked well on all levels and not the: "I'm not the smartest kid at school and I need a desperate HS boyfriend now. Woe is me." The rest was great but really, Luke. Do you even know how to use the bathroom by yourself anymore?

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It's really time for groups like GLAAD to stop treating this show like it's a positive depiction of same-sex parents.

 

To have Mitch and Cam ignore their daughter's terrified screams because they're too busy obsessing over their singing? Really?

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I don't have a problem with Andy; I kind of like him. But, I'm disappointed that the Beth problem got solved so quickly. I was wanting her to get back to her Fatal Attraction persona and freak everyone out for awhile. This story just sorta wandered away...

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"We'll debut our song as a special holiday, 'screw you' to the family."

 

"Screeches and Herb"

"Simon and Godawful"

 

"You're sweatin' like a heroin addict,"

 

Joe: "Snow?"

Manny: "No, that's a leaf."

 

F.N. Wilson, cabin lady: "I buy their fat kids clothes in aspirational sizes."

 

Jay: "Andy, chop chop; Joe's making his bathroom face."

 

Gloria: "Who wants ay-guh noe-guh?" (eggnog) 

 

"We should have left you out in the warm."

 

Loved that little, dry, tone deaf  Lily is back.

Edited by ari333
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Andrea Martin was perfection. I absolutely loved Fig. What a great character. I hope she comes back.

 

Simon and Godawful was fantastic. 

 

I also liked when Phil gave Andy the jacket, saying the real estate company rhymed with Century Not Very Fun.

 

 

My, has Lily grown! At first I thought she had improved as an actress, but unfortunately there were several times when it was clear (to me) that she hadn't. Still, I loved her pedaling the Big Wheel around the hallways a la The Shining.

 

That carved door was gorgeous.

 

I like Andy, but I didn't like that the show copped out with Beth having cheated on him (AND cheated on the other guy too). 

 

I really wanted Mitch and Cam to sing their song. They sounded beautiful. So did Alex and Fig, but I wanted M & C to shine too.

 

Gloria's hair looked great. I was so envious of how shiny it was in her first talking head.

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That carved door was gorgeous.

 

The door to the Forgotten Boy's room?  Man, that hallway really looked like it was somewhere at the Grand Californian Hotel at Disneyland.  I know they've filmed there before, but I can't figure out where the rest of the locations would have been, and I can't imagine that they'd trek down there just for a hallway.

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I still don't like the Andy character, but I'm relieved it's done with the "will they or won't they" storyline. Now he and Hailey can move on and perhaps have interesting story plots.

 

Like others, I thought The Shining was the best part. 

Andrea Martin was hilarious as a wet blanket, culminating to the end with the "snow." 

This is the first time I've enjoyed Alex in a long time. Loved how she was being sweet and everyone thought she was being, well, Alex.

Edited by Snow Apple
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Haley and Andy just gross me out. Don't care if Beth was also cheating on him, Andy's still a cheater and Haley's now the kind of girl who would sleep with someone else's fiance. It makes both characters look awful and I don't know how the writers expect us to root for them now. Also, Gloria is right.. Haley's way out of Andy's league look-wise and now that he's a cheater he's not really the upstanding pillar of morality she thought he was, so what's the appeal? Other than him having some personality traits similar to her father. 

 

After not hearing from Luke for a couple of episodes, he only seems even more awkward now. 

 

Overall the episode wasn't terrible. Had some funny moments. Fig was pretty funny and I found Mitch and Cam's attempt to redeem themselves entertaining. 

 

I loved Cam listing the insulting band names the family referred to them as (i.e. Simon & Godawful) and then ending with just 'Nickelback.'

 

I love that despite not being musically relevant for years now, Nickelback is still as much of a joke as ever. This week's Scream Queens episode featured a couple of jokes mocking the band and the lead singer too. 

 

Did we know that Alex had such a beautiful voice-has she ever sung on the show before. I am not talking about the actress, I am talking about the character.

 

Alex sang once a few seasons ago in that episode where Claire and Haley end up staying to watch her band perform in some coffee shop. She didn't sing any actual words but she did some harmonizing or whatever you'd call it and her mother and sister were shocked to find out she can sing. So it actually has been established than Alex can sing. 

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Aw I liked this one. SEE, WRITERS? PEOPLE LIKE IT WHEN THE WHOLE FAMILY IS TOGETHER.

 

A lot of good lines.  "We'll debut our song as a special holiday 'screw you' to the family." “She's a stone-cold 10 and you're a Utah 7.”

 

I can’t see a drop of sexual charisma in Andy or sense even a hint of chemistry between Andy and Haley.

 

Jay giving his company to his daughter (who’s worked there for, what, 2 years?) would not look good to his employees. It’s his right to do so, of course, but blatant nepotism is ugly.

 

Well, these people are supposed to be like 22 or so and who gets married that young anymore?

 

A shockingly high number of people (just going off what I see and hear about). It may not be as true in big cities on the coasts, but everywhere else…yeah.

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Oh, I took it as "He's a 7 even in Utah, where standards are lower." So basically he's only moderately attractive in a state where there aren't a lot of amazingly attractive people. I saw it as a slam against both Andy and the state of Utah.

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Agree with others who said that Clare isn't qualified to run the company.  All I come up with is that it will be a long transition, or Jay will officially retire but advise her behind the scenes.

 

"Hey, wanna hit the pipe one more time before we get on the road?"

"Um, yeah, couldn't hurt."

 

You subversive little show, you...

Edited by Lone Wolf
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Oh, I took it as "He's a 7 even in Utah, where standards are lower." So basically he's only moderately attractive in a state where there aren't a lot of amazingly attractive people. I saw it as a slam against both Andy and the state of Utah.

Yeah, it's like Hot in Cleveland where the ladies move to Cleveland because, while they are considered over the hill and no longer "hot" in California where all the "beautiful" people live, they are still hot in a smaller pool like Cleveland. It's pretty patronizing. Why they specifically picked Utah I don't know unless that's where Andy is from which others have surmised, I just don't remember that.

I can't get over how much Lily has grown up. Usually on TV, the character ages faster than the actor, but not in this case. I really think they had some unfortunate casting on this show with the kids. They've mostly turned out to be uninspired actors and kind of awkward as they've grown up with the exception of Haley and Alex.

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Jay giving his company to his daughter (who’s worked there for, what, 2 years?) would not look good to his employees. It’s his right to do so, of course, but blatant nepotism is ugly.

 

 

Exactly.  Just the fact that Claire is so entitled and expects to be CEO after only working there for a couple of years (at most) really irritated me. Entitlement + nepotism is even uglier.

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I thought Jay and Claire both were on the same page that Claire could one day take over. At least I believe Claire had considered the possibility. She has actually been working really hard at the company--mostly with clients--where she needs improvement is with employee relations (and the writers deciding whether they want to show her as competent from week to week). So, not really a surprise to me that Jay wants his daughter, who he has supposedly been grooming for years, to take over for him as CEO. Nepotism would be more if he tried to hand it over to Mitchell at this point (or worse, Manny! Ha); at least they've been stressing how hard Claire has been working. (Unfortunately, the writers have equally stressed how BAD the majority of the employees' general impression of her is).

I think Lily's actress has improved vastly over the years--can't say the same for the Luke and Manny actors.

"Andy, take off the blazer."

Nice cabin! I want to go there next year for Christmas...sans ash, screams, and forest fires. Too bad Jay didn't arrange the fake snow again for Joe's benefit this time.

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Jay giving his company to his daughter (who’s worked there for, what, 2 years?) would not look good to his employees. It’s his right to do so, of course, but blatant nepotism is ugly.

    

 

Exactly.  Just the fact that Claire is so entitled and expects to be CEO after only working there for a couple of years (at most) really irritated me. Entitlement + nepotism is even uglier.

 

 

It was annoying to hear Claire talk about all the family vacations she has missed and the blood, sweat, and tears she has put into the company, when I doubt she have even worked there 3 years.  Also, they have gone on tons of vacations and she seems to spend a lot of time with her family.

 

I am sure there is a deserving employee of Jay's that is probably getting screwed.  It would have made more sense if Chuck Feeney was a real person and Jay explained to Claire there were many people ahead of her and just because she is his daughter does not automatically mean she gets to run the company.

 

However, very few second or third generation small businesses survive, because of entitled offspring, so that is realistic.

 

I also hated that Gloria only pointed out that Hailey is a stone cold 10 and did not talk about any other good qualities, but I understood she was trying to move on quickly.

Edited by qtpye
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at least they've been stressing how hard Claire has been working. (Unfortunately, the writers have equally stressed how BAD the majority of the employees' general impression of her is).

I know, because when they show Claire trying to get along with them or take charge, as I have said, they act that if they ignore her, she will go away. Yet, we have seen Claire be very competent and do her job when it suits the writers and not the plot. I already see the company in panic with Jay retiring and along the lines of: "Jay don't go!" "Claire ordered, mint chip ice cream cake!" "MINT CHIP!" "What was she thinking?" Jay: "Why was that so bad?" Employee: "It was mint chip!"

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It was annoying to hear Claire talk about all the family vacations she has missed and the blood, sweat, and tears she has put into the company, when I doubt she have even worked there 3 years.

 

For real. She drops out of the work force for 20 years, waltzes back in, and gets indignant when she's not handed the CEO position. Seriously, Claire?

 

I also hated that Gloria only pointed out that Hailey is a stone cold 10 and did not talk about any other good qualities

 

Does Haley have especially good qualities worth talking about? She's not especially nice to people. She's dumb. She's funny in a mean way. She's not an amazing daughter or sibling. She's not ambitious. She slept with an engaged guy. She doesn't seem to have any interests except fashion. I mean, her looks (and onetime status as popular girl) are pretty much her defining features.

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Well I agree with what most everyone else said. I thought it was too easy on Andy and Haley by having her cheat too. ANd Claire has not shown, at least from what we have seen, she is ready to run Jay's company. And yes I would say Hailey beyond her looks really does not have much going for her.

I did think it was funny how Alex was trying to be cheery and everyone thought she was sarcastic.

And I liked The Shining homage.

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Anyone else pick up on a distinct "Debbie Downer" vibe from the Fig Wilson character? "I warn them about cancer...I buy their fat kids clothes in aspirational sizes...I invite them all to my dogs' funerals. Last one ran straight into traffic." and Alex's line about just reading her paper on how solar flares are going to wipe out life on earth. If they had played a sad trombone after each of her lines I wouldn't have been at all surprised.

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I enjoyed the same things as everyone else--the door, the Shining, Fig and her "aspirational size" gifts, LOL.  We part ways on the negatives.

 

I dislike Sophia V. and Gloria so much I can't even watch the episodes revolving around her (which are many.)  So my head hurts when she screws up the winter/holiday vacation for a dozen people and it's fine because, I guess, she's just way too beautiful and sexy for anyone to mind.  Mitch and Cam get all kinds of grief about something that happened a year ago, but no one sweating through their ski pants rags on Gloria?  Aiesh. 

 

But I must be perverse because I like both metrosexual Manny and suddenly giant man-child Luke and think Lily is in serious need of some boundaries.

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I absolutely loathe Andy and want him to go away. He drags down the show for me. It's not the actor's fault he's fine in other roles but I hate him here.

Thank you. The show was already dragging a bit for me (not really its fault, it's been on for over six seasons and shows rarely stay great for that long) but Andy alone has officially killed it for me. I refuse to watch any episode that I see his dumb, annoying, round, douchy looking face. Never has the term "punchable face" been more appropriate. And I'm sorry but I see ZERO chemistry between him and Hayley. I really am curious as to why the writers seemed to like the character and actor so much.

Edited by truthaboutluv
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I really am curious as to why the writers seemed to like the character and actor so much.

You do have to wonder sometimes. Its not like this is the first TV series to favorite an actor/actress and will use them because they can or find something they like about him. Of course my favorite was an actor they had on Everwood once upon a time. The main show runner liked the actor so much because he was: "hot" and while they had a story line and 12 episode contract to him. They wasted it to spend time on Sarah Drew's character and his story line was reduced to 3 episodes and then he was gone but he would show up in episodes with his shirt off or in a tank top because they "had to use him". I feel that is Andy, some of the writers have this want of not having any other show use him, so they have to keep him on. I'm sure the actor is fine, after all its a regular paycheck. However, he adds nothing to the show anymore, even with Joe. Once Jay is "retired" guess who can be home all the time with him? Yep, dear old dad of course, Gloria doesn't work but hey, that's why they need a nanny so she can try out new high heels and beauty creams. 

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To be fair when Beth was first introduced as a concept it was implied that she was cheating on him.

 

 

It was pretty strongly implied -- all the Dunphies thought she was cheating (on a rather massive scale, as I recall) but Andy couldn't see it.  One of the ways he's a good counterpart to Phil, who can't see a lot of obvious things in front of him.

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I believe Joe was already attending the Learnin' Barn when Jay said Andy just ate the last donut, so he was still around then. Jay wanted Andy on bathroom duty for Joe while at the Christmas cabin (so, hopefully, Andy was on the clock for that), and an episode or two ago Andy said he is working for half of Haley's family. So, I guess he still helps out Jay and Gloria when they're both too busy (cue eyeroll). (Didn't Jay or Gloria say he only worked about four hours a day, maybe not even the entire week?)

The actor who plays Andy is in a couple shows on Comedy Central, so MF isn't stringing him along for exclusive claims to Bumper.

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It was pretty strongly implied -- all the Dunphies thought she was cheating (on a rather massive scale, as I recall) but Andy couldn't see it.  One of the ways he's a good counterpart to Phil, who can't see a lot of obvious things in front of him.

That was the thing too, also Andy kept explaining that Beth just enjoyed playing the game the last few years. Any other guy would have decided it wasn't worth it, but not Andy. He is like Phil, he is oblivious to things right in front of him. He just doesn't go into any of Phil's weird projects from raising baby ducks to trying to turn Halloween into a fun cheerful day. Or wants to show he can still have fun and not get "old". Andy just doesn't know when to realize things need to end, just like with pushing the buttons at the house a few episodes ago. Like Haley said: "Why do you keep pushing the buttons?" 

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