Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)

[PikaScrewChu]

2 hours ago, BitterApple said:

I wish Josie would hold off on having babies for a few years since she's so young and just started a career, but it's not likely to happen. If Alyssa isn't strong-willed enough to go on birth control, I doubt Josie will be.

Isn't John's family diehard Gothardites? I don't think Alyssa had much of a shot of using birth control unless she was somehow able to hide being on birth control from everyone. She's going to hit the double digits at the rate she's going. John's father must be pleased. The other Bateses may have a better chance at spacing out their pregnancies now that they see how fertile Alyssa and Erin are. I don't think Alyssa quite thought the marriage thing beyond "I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE".

Erin is going to have as many as she can, isn't she? Well Chad, it takes two to procreate. I don't feel sorry for him if they find themselves suddenly overwhelmed with a dozen children. They know what causes it at this point and how stressful Erin's pregnancies are. They are willingly choosing to put themselves in this situation. I can see Michael getting roped into moving close by to be a live-in nanny at the rate Princess Erin is going. Gil and Kelly don't mess around. They've been marrying off the daughters as fast as they possibly can. So there will be no Aunt-Moms on call for the Paines.

[ginger90]

2 hours ago, Misslindsey said:

So has JillRod made her pilgrimage to see Tim yet?

She hasn’t done her September blog post yet. I guess she’s getting it JUST RIGHT !

[Sew Sumi]

Maybe her embellished take on the KOA incident is supposed to take its place?

[sixlets]

5 hours ago, Portia said:

Erin's the one in navy, right? That's pretty much exactly the dress that I wore to the wedding of one of my daughters. She looks way overdressed for church, IMO.

This is kind of mean, but this picture reminds me of something my daughters used to snark about when they were teens: girls who think they're pretty (and convince boys they're pretty) simply because they're thin and blonde.

It's funny you mentioned Erin's dress.  My mother-in-law wore a very similar style to our wedding back in 2002.  Hers was more royal blue as opposed to the dark navy.  Chad looks like a celebrity, but I just can't place who it is.  It drives me nuts every time I see that pic.

Josie was a gorgeous (teen) bride.  She kinda reminds of Kristin Chenoweth.  They make a lovely couple, and I wish them the best (9 months before the baby).

[SongbirdHollow]

Regarding the visible undershirt,  in the 80's my cousin married a guy who wore a white tux and tube socks (white with red stripes). It was hilariously ridiculous.

I absolutely love the nature girl aesthetic that Josie went with. Even the big green bouquet. I wonder if she chose it all herself or someone (her florist aunt?) coordinated everything.

[Barb23]

1 hour ago, SongbirdHollow said:

Regarding the visible undershirt,  in the 80's my cousin married a guy who wore a white tux and tube socks (white with red stripes). It was hilariously ridiculous.

 

MR Barb forgot to bring dress socks to wear at a formal dinner on a cruise one time. We were with a group from his work so I'm not sure why he didnt borrow a pair. He really didn't care & when we got to our table he realized he wasn't the only one.  The older teenage sons of his coworker were sporting white socks as well.

[DragonFaerie]

On October 7, 2018 at 12:24 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Interesting juxtaposition between the Websters and Paine's here. Erin really is a princess. 

All fundie men, please look to guy on the left.  This is how your pants should look - not bundled on top of your shoes.  While I"m not a fan of the brown shoes with a blue/black suit - he's miles ahead of those damn elf shoes Derlick wears.  Guy on the right - men's pants come in a waist and inseem size.  Figure yours out and buy appropriately!!!  Sorry, pet peeve.

[BitterApple]

14 minutes ago, DragonFaerie said:

All fundie men, please look to guy on the left.  This is how your pants should look - not bundled on top of your shoes.  While I"m not a fan of the brown shoes with a blue/black suit - he's miles ahead of those damn elf shoes Derlick wears.  Guy on the right - men's pants come in a waist and inseem size.  Figure yours out and buy appropriately!!!  Sorry, pet peeve.

You're not being nitpicky. Given the amount of weddings and church functions these guys attend, you'd think they'd have at least one well-fitted suit. It's not expensive to have pants hemmed, and many dry cleaners offer tailoring services. I agree the pant cuffs bunching and pooling at their legs looks sloppy 

[DragonFaerie]

Thanks!  Growing up in the South and being taught to sew at a young age like all these Fundie girls seem to be,  along with their mothers, the fact that the men never seem to have a pressed, hemmed suit is shameable.  I grew up with homemade clothes and hand me downs, but it's called a hem folks.

[Absolom]

John probably has to put some effort into getting pants long enough so he's much less likely to find a pair of pants that are too long.  :)  That said, Chad shouldn't have a lot of trouble finding his right size or a lot closer than two extra inches.

[cereality]

Kelton and Josie look great and have always seemed very much like they adore each other; we know from the show they are emotionally close, but can see their physical connection too. TMI but they're one of the rare fundie couples where I bet the wedding night/honeymoon wasn't THAT awkward bc they seem to have chemistry, as opposed to other fundies who were practically doing it with a near stranger. I'm sure this is just my exhaustion speaking but I'm kinda jealous. She's 19, has a man for life, who will provide for her financially, her life is set and they will live the traditional path -- kids; going to the grandparents' homes all the time etc.; Josie will be done working in a hot second or will drop down to super part time/doing hair for fundie brides or giving haircuts at home or something; cheesy family outings with her, Kelton, and their kids. IDK -- it seems tempting when you're 30 something, did all the "right" things with ivy league degrees etc. and your life is work, deadlines, bills, 401ks, and NYC hecticness.

But then again if she's pregnant in 2 months or 2 years or anytime before age 25 (which she mostly certainly will be), I will most certainly NOT be jealous because they will not have taken the time to just be themselves, get to know each other, travel, and really take advantage of starting a marriage so young. 

I don't see them using BC. I mean MAYBE - if Kelton (understandably) is scarred by what happened to his mother and in that case only agrees to 2 children delivered in a super controlled environment like a hospital c-section done by the best MD at the top health system in Tennessee; that's how I think many normal people would feel after what he/his family went thru. Yet IDK he and his family ARE fundie -- so it very much could be a "trust in God" and pray about it thing. While they act/dress normal, have jobs, don't talk 24-7 about getting to kiss -- as opposed to Duggar weddings -- the Balkas are fundie. He and his siblings were homeschooled used one of those booklet curriculums(a)? He went to PCC bc that was his mom's alma mater and it seems like the college age siblings are/will be going there. So they may end up like John and Alyssa where Alyssa says, she doesn't want a ton of kids; says 6 max etc.; John does the "right" thing by saying -- I want however many you want. And yet they STILL have a kid per year for the first few years of marriage suggesting that those kind of "limits" are all talk and no one is doing anything like taking a pill, putting on a condom, or even rhythm or pulling out.

[graefin]

5 hours ago, ginger90 said:

She hasn’t done her September blog post yet. I guess she’s getting it JUST RIGHT !

It takes time to decide which random words to type in ALL CAPS, add in all those exclamation marks!!!, and spell out all those emoticons, SMILE!

[DragonFaerie]

6 minutes ago, graefin said:

It takes time to decide which random words to type in ALL CAPS, add in all those exclamation marks!!!, and spell out all those emoticons, SMILE!

oh CRAP, someone PLEASE tell me she's NOT pregnant with #14!!!

[kokapetl]

On 09/10/2018 at 8:18 AM, Lunera said:

 A closer look at Josie's dress

 

A

That guy has the smile of a beauty pageant contestant.

[drafan]

1 hour ago, DragonFaerie said:

All fundie men, please look to guy on the left.  This is how your pants should look - not bundled on top of your shoes.  appropriately!!!  Sorry, pet peeve.

LOL. I'm the exact opposite. My family all has overly long legs, and finding any pants that bunch up with extra material is like hitting the jackpot. My sis and I still call each other when we find a brand that runs long. (Long arms too....my mom used to look for extra material inside the sleeves of coats, in order to "let them down". )

That Bates bride is stunning and I love the on-trend mega-bouquet. These girls do their Pinterest homework!

[AnnieBeez]

31 minutes ago, kokapetl said:

That guy has the smile of a beauty pageant contestant.

And looks about 15. 

[Heathen]

Does the latest Bates-adjacent groom have a job to support his new wife and soon-to-be children? Is he attending a real college, not Clown College? 

[BitterApple]

5 minutes ago, Heathen said:

Does the latest Bates-adjacent groom have a job to support his new wife and soon-to-be children? Is he attending a real college, not Clown College? 

He's a plumber in a family-owned business. 

[Misslindsey]

8 hours ago, Heathen said:

Does the latest Bates-adjacent groom have a job to support his new wife and soon-to-be children? Is he attending a real college, not Clown College? 

He also has a finance degree from, I think, Pensacola Christian College.

[Still breathing]

12 hours ago, drafan said:

LOL. I'm the exact opposite. My family all has overly long legs, and finding any pants that bunch up with extra material is like hitting the jackpot. My sis and I still call each other when we find a brand that runs long. (Long arms too....my mom used to look for extra material inside the sleeves of coats, in order to "let them down". )

That Bates bride is stunning and I love the on-trend mega-bouquet. These girls do their Pinterest homework!

FYI any high end brand pants/jeans ALWAYS run long.  32 inches plus.  

[Heathen]

2 hours ago, Misslindsey said:

He also has a finance degree from, I think, Pensacola Christian College.

PCC isn't much better than Clown College. 

Why get an actual degree if his family owns a plumbing business? Or why work as a plumber when one has a finance (i.e., clean hands) degree? Fundie logic, I guess. 

[Barb23]

If the Duggars would have gone to a brick & mortar school there's a good possibility they all could have taken a home ec class or two and learned cooking & sewing basics.   It was called FACS when my son took it.  He loved it. They made a basic tote bag that could be used by a boy or girl.  It was just a couple of straight seams & threading a thin rope through the top but he loved that he had sewn it.

[Heathen]

7 minutes ago, Barb23 said:

If the Duggars would have gone to a brick & mortar school there's a good possibility they all could have learned something.

Fixed it for you! 

[Catfin]

1 hour ago, Still breathing said:

FYI any high end brand pants/jeans ALWAYS run long.  32 inches plus.  

Still too short! ? I need 35 inch inseam. 

[Portia]

1 hour ago, Heathen said:

PCC isn't much better than Clown College. 

Why get an actual degree if his family owns a plumbing business? Or why work as a plumber when one has a finance (i.e., clean hands) degree? Fundie logic, I guess. 

I'm pretty sure most Finance jobs are located in Satan Sector.  But seriously . . .  perhaps he likes working with his hands. Or maybe he wants to learn every aspect of the family business but has his eye on a future position as the company's CFO. Just guessing, of course. But I'm reminded of a family friend who recently went to work as a technician in his dad's Heating & AC business. The son obtained bachelor's degrees in HVAC and Business Admin. He enjoys the tech work, but it's assumed that he will one day take over the administration of the business.

[Natalie68]

On 10/8/2018 at 9:00 AM, cereality said:

They haven’t announced yet but given the late Sept engagement, my bet is a 3 mo engagement which makes it a Christmas wedding. This family doesn’t wait. IDK too many people who want to get married in Jan/Feb (though these people would get hitched on a random Tuesday in Jan if it meant getting it on that day), so the next “popular” wedding time ends up being spring. No way Carlin can wait another 6 months.

They seem to like Christmas weddings. Zach and Tori both did that. I also think they’re on a budget and Christmas time is cheaper — vendors/caterers aren’t particularly busy after the early Dec business holiday party rush ends (which may not even be significant in BFE), I bet you can get some good discounts.

Plus everything is already decorated

[PradaKitty]

I agree that the bride and groom look young, but they don’t look like children!  My parents wedding portrait always cracks me up because my dad looks about 15 in the photo (he was 28!) and my mom looks like she’s in her 40’s (she was  33!). I am soooooooooo glad I inherited my dad’s “young genes”.

[MargeGunderson]

18 hours ago, BitterApple said:

You're not being nitpicky. Given the amount of weddings and church functions these guys attend, you'd think they'd have at least one well-fitted suit. It's not expensive to have pants hemmed, and many dry cleaners offer tailoring services. I agree the pant cuffs bunching and pooling at their legs looks sloppy 

Heck, most places that sell suits offer tailoring, sometimes for free with purchase! 

(There’s plenty of room on my judging bench, so feel free to join me. No judgment too petty!)

[Steff]

4 hours ago, Heathen said:

PCC isn't much better than Clown College. 

Why get an actual degree if his family owns a plumbing business? Or why work as a plumber when one has a finance (i.e., clean hands) degree? Fundie logic, I guess. 

Plumbers can actually make really good money & it's a career, not just a job.  Having a finance degree could be for moving up in the family company or eventually taking it over.  He may prefer working out in the field instead of stuck in an office every day. 

 

Not defending the Bates's views, just pointing out that a licensed plumber (not a plumber's helper) can make a good living. 

[Heathen]

6 minutes ago, Steff said:

Plumbers can actually make really good money & it's a career, not just a job.  Having a finance degree could be for moving up in the family company or eventually taking it over.  He may prefer working out in the field instead of stuck in an office every day. 

 

Not defending the Bates's views, just pointing out that a licensed plumber (not a plumber's helper) can make a good living. 

I'm aware of how much plumbers can make and that it's a career. My question was why spend the money on a college education if he didn't need it, or why get a degree in finance if his intent is to run his family's business. A BBA would be better suited to running a small business. 

[Churchhoney]

I just looked at Pensacola Christian's list of majors, minors, concentrations, etc. .... They don't offer a major in Finance -- only a minor or a concentration. ....

They do, on the other hand, have a major in "Business."

They don't list "Business Administration" at all, but they do list "Business Management" -- which I would assume is their term for something quite similar to "Business Administration"? Anyway, it, too, doesn't rate a major, but only a minor or a concentration..............

So maybe he was a Business major with a concentration or minor in Finance. Why he'd pick that instead of "Business Management," who knows? But maybe "Finance" just sounded cool to him or something. You make these decisions when you're 19 or thereabouts -- you aren't necessarily thinking with extreme practicality.  

Or he figured he was already getting the business-management basics in his overall degree, so he could pick something a little outside the box that sounded interesting......Especially since he was going to be a plumber, anyway. 

In any case, he doesn't have a major in Finance. And most likely does have a major in Business ... Although for all we know, he could have a major in Bible with a minor in Finance, I guess.....if he were marrying a Duggar, he probably would.

Edited October 10, 2018 by Churchhoney

[GeeGolly]

I think Josie and Kelton do look madly in love. And things may turn out happily ever after. But I bet many of us looked and felt the same way with our first girl/boyfriend. 

[Barb23]

3 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

 But I bet many of us looked and felt the same way with our first girl/boyfriend. 

How true.  

[Still breathing]

11 hours ago, Catfin said:

Still too short! ? I need 35 inch inseam. 

My MOTHER denim brand comes 35 inches!  They are my all time fav brand of jeans...... 

[peppergal]

On 10/9/2018 at 7:05 PM, sixlets said:

 Chad looks like a celebrity, but I just can't place who it is.  It drives me nuts every time I see that pic.
 

He looks a bit like early 2000s Christian Slater to me.

[3 is enough]

On 10/9/2018 at 6:10 PM, DragonFaerie said:

All fundie men, please look to guy on the left.  This is how your pants should look - not bundled on top of your shoes.  While I"m not a fan of the brown shoes with a blue/black suit - he's miles ahead of those damn elf shoes Derlick wears.  Guy on the right - men's pants come in a waist and inseem size.  Figure yours out and buy appropriately!!!  Sorry, pet peeve.

Bingo!  And, if I might add, shoe polish is your friend.  I find that no one seems to know how to take care of their shoes anymore. 

Also, I have to wonder just how much money Alyssa and Erin spend on clothes for themselves and their kids.  In every picture they post they are wearing something new. Maybe Alyssa's cleaning job pays for her clothing obsession, but Erin and Chad must be on an even tighter budget now that he is in business for himself.

Edited October 11, 2018 by 3 is enough

[sixlets]

7 hours ago, peppergal said:

He looks a bit like early 2000s Christian Slater to me.

I definitely see that.  I think I finally got it--Oliver Hudson.  

[Abstract]

10 hours ago, peppergal said:

He looks a bit like early 2000s Christian Slater to me.

I was thinking Luke Perry.

[drafan]

On 10/10/2018 at 12:37 PM, Catfin said:

Still too short! ? I need 35 inch inseam. 

Hahaha....yup...need at least 33" and some in the family wear 36".  It's serious.

10 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Also, I have to wonder just how much money Alyssa and Erin spend on clothes for themselves and their kids.  In every picture they post they are wearing something new. Maybe Alyssa's cleaning job pays for her clothing obsession, but Erin and Chad must be on an even tighter budget now that he is in business for himself.

What is Chad's business?

[3 is enough]

25 minutes ago, drafan said:

What is Chad's business?

I think it is some sort of furniture building/refinishing business.  

[GeeGolly]

3 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

I think it is some sort of furniture building/refinishing business.  

And home remodeling/renovations.

[graefin]

16 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Also, I have to wonder just how much money Alyssa and Erin spend on clothes for themselves and their kids.  In every picture they post they are wearing something new. Maybe Alyssa's cleaning job pays for her clothing obsession, but Erin and Chad must be on an even tighter budget now that he is in business for himself.

Alyssa, at least, strikes me as a hard worker. She posted on Instagram a while back about switching off duties when her husband comes home from work--he watches the kids and she goes out to clean for pay. I can't fathom Erin doing the same. Chad goes out to work and then comes home and works some more and then rubs Erin's feet at the end of the day. I also think Erin basically dresses like her mother :P Alyssa is definitely the more fashion forward of the two.

[louannems]

On 10/10/2018 at 9:37 AM, Catfin said:

Still too short! ? I need 35 inch inseam. 

Lands End offers free hemming, to the one fourth inch, up to 36 inches, on most all of their pants.  Great quality, too.

That's for women's pants.  Men's probably go longer.

[Fuzzysox]

On 10/11/2018 at 11:18 AM, 3 is enough said:

 

Also, I have to wonder just how much money Alyssa and Erin spend on clothes for themselves and their kids.  In every picture they post they are wearing something new. 

 

A lot of their clothes look like they come from Penny's. Penny's has been having great 50% off clearance and $10 off when you spend $25 off coupons. Combine the two and you get really good deals. They can afford new because a lot of times the markdowns are that good. I get dresses for my twins there all the time. My favorite deal was a $100 dress for $6. I wore it and everyone commented on how nice it looked. I told NO one the price. lol

Edited October 12, 2018 by Fuzzysox

[BitterApple]

Alyssa probably does well at outlet malls. One of the reasons I usually don't care for outlets is because all the good stuff is size 2-4, but Alyssa being so thin means she can probably snap up a lot of cute dresses for not a lot of money. It won't be current season, but most people don't notice that sort of thing anyways. 

[LilJen]

On ‎10‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 10:31 PM, kokapetl said:

That guy has the smile of a beauty pageant contestant.

Underbite, I detect. Slight.

[queenanne]

1 hour ago, Fuzzysox said:

A lot of their clothes look like they come from Penny's. Penny's has been having great 50% off clearance and $10 off when you spend $25 off coupons. Combine the two and you get really good deals. They can afford new because a lot of times the markdowns are that good. I get dresses for my twins there all the time. My favorite deal was a $100 dress for $6. I wore it and everyone commented on how nice it looked. I told NO one the price. lol

Once I found a very attractive bra at Penney's marked down to $2.75 (why the 75 cents?  I don't know).  It has to rank as the shopping bargain of my life, and I believe I have told everyone nearby me, lol, whenever the topic of "bargains" arises.  I remembered thinking, "that has to be cheaper than the manufacturer paid to make it!"

[jennblevins]

I got a sports bra for 1 cent at Nordstrom Rack. Even the clerk had no idea why it was so cheap, and it turned out to be the best sports bra I’ve ever worn.  I went right back and bought another one at full (for the Rack) price.

As for the Bates girls, I agree with @BitterApple that Alyssa probably has better than average results at outlet malls and sales because of her size.  Possibly even thrift stores — the ones near my old office had loads of high-end clothes in tiny sizes.  

[Temperance]

Whitney Bates was a wearing a dress she got from Marshalls. I've started shopping at Marshalls and TJ Maxx too and the best deal I've gotten is a nice bra for $4.99. It's not too hard to get good deals, especially if you have time to look. 

[Jynnan tonnix]

18 minutes ago, Temperance said:

Whitney Bates was a wearing a dress she got from Marshalls. I've started shopping at Marshalls and TJ Maxx too and the best deal I've gotten is a nice bra for $4.99. It's not too hard to get good deals, especially if you have time to look. 

I don't seem to have much luck with those as they tend to have very little in larger sizes. I wear around a 14/16, so a lot of actual plus sizes are cut a bit roomier than I prefer, but it's really hard to find things above a 12 in regular sizes much of the time.

When we lived in Southern GA, my favorite place was the Dillard's (though that name has different connotations to me now!) clearance outlet at one of the malls in the Jacksonville area. I got a number of dresses originally marked around $150 for less than $15, and Mr. Jyn was forever coming out of there with armloads of dress shirts originally marked $80 and up for $7 or $8 apiece.