S10.E12: Tell All: Part 1

[Galloway Cave]

Quote

The Browns are left reeling as frank discussion leads to new insights and emotional meltdowns; the question remains as to whether or not the family will ever settle down in one location; Meri and Kody's relationship.

OK, that first sentence is just way over the top. And the real question that remains is will they EVER "Tell All". Personally, I am waiting on a Tell-All Book from one of the kids.

[Kohola3]

7 minutes ago, Galloway Cave said:

OK, that first sentence is just way over the top.

Jeepers, talk about Bait and Switch.  You know that sentence couldn't be further from the truth.

[tinaw]

I want Sobbins head to explode. That would make me happy

[Sandy W]

Frank and discussion are 2 words that will never appear in the Brown's lexicon.

OK, I just needed to make a lame remark to get the green notifications dot activated.

[Fostersmom]

They only thing coming close to "frank" will be the smug look on Robyn's face and the scowl on Meri's. 

[deirdra]

I hope it is not another "frank" talk like Meri and Mariah had a couple of years back, when instead of talking in the house where they were the only two people, they drove to a nearby park that had a open air gazebo on a cold grey winter day to talk about things like being gay and their relationship with each other. It was similar in content to the talk at the beginning of this season where Meri had her co-catfishee talk to Mariah.

Meri: We need to talk about this thing between us.

Mariah: What thing?

Meri: You know. The thing.

Mariah: I don't want to talk about it.

Blah, blah, blah ad infinitum.

[Tatortot]

What!  another new host?   Who is this now?

[Rabbit Hutch]

Frank questions I'd like to phone in, but I will never get a chance:

1. How come y'all are so proud to be sisterwives, but can't stand the thought of even sharing a stove amongst you for as few as 3 or 4 WEEKS? Looking at y'all, CHRISTINE and ROBYN!

2. How come Christine had to get MyKankles to travel in from Utah to babysit Truely while she was a Lulacruzin, and not get sistaRobyn to help with Truely, since she lives in the SAME town?

3. How come Robyn's house is so much bigger than Christine and Janelle's and, why can't the kids double up while in the RENTALS?

4. Why do y'all let Cootie run around off his leash so much? It's gotta be bad for plyg business, as he looks deranged.

5. Cootie, that man-bun has got to go.  Folks are  cracking their nut laughing at you, for rill.

6. Janelle, hun, you need to STRIVE for quittin time, for no one's buying you as a health coach.

These people, sheesh.  😒

[ginger90]

[xwordfanatik]

33 minutes ago, deirdra said:

I hope it is not another "frank" talk like Meri and Mariah had a couple of years back, when instead of talking in the house where they were the only two people, they drove to a nearby park that had a open air gazebo on a cold grey winter day to talk about things like being gay and their relationship with each other. It was similar in content to the talk at the beginning of this season where Meri had her co-catfishee talk to Mariah.

Meri: We need to talk about this thing between us.

Mariah: What thing?

Meri: You know. The thing.

Mariah: I don't want to talk about it.

Blah, blah, blah ad infinitum.

IIRC, Mariah hadn't yet made the announcement that she was gay, when Meri took Breanna to visit Mariah.  Not that it really made a difference in that awkward conversation.  

Nope, this Tell-All will be a lot of lying, pissy looks, Kootie man-spreading and crowing.  You know, just like the other Tell-Nothingks.  One difference I noticed is that Kootie is sitting between Christine and of course, wife favorite Robo.  I don't remember ever seeing that configuration before on these year-end "specials."  

[Kohola3]

Waiting with bated breath so see the hairstyle of the day.  Not.

[Sandy W]

5 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

Waiting with bated breath so see the hairstyle of the day.  Not.

In the photo Ginger posted earlier today, showing Kody, Christine and Truely having a swell BD celebration on the Plains of Plague, he was sporting a full mustache.  I'm not a fan of facial hair, but it did give more balance to that billy goat beard.

[xwordfanatik]

I didn't notice that full mustache, Sandy.  I'll be DVRing the Tell-Nothing, and watching in the a.m.  Looking forward to snarking with you good people tomorrow, as usual.

[LucyEth]

I am sure as usual, Robyn and Christine will be annoyed every time Kody opens his mouth and tell him to shut up etc.  We will probably learn nothing we don't already know.

[Adeejay]

For all that is good and holy, please tell me I did not just hear Mitch say he is open to polygamy but Aspyn isn't.  I have a feeling sooner or later she is going to cave.  

[greekmom]

2 minutes ago, Adeejay said:

For all that is good and holy, please tell me I did not just hear Mitch say he is open to polygamy but Aspyn isn't.  I have a feeling sooner or later she is going to cave.  

He did. She did.  It's sad.

[Kohola3]

4 minutes ago, greekmom said:

He did. She did. 

He'll do it whether or not she wants to. Men rule in that cult.

[kicotan]

Maybe it’s just me but they all look like the trained sea lions at a Sea World show, sitting in their designated spot, waiting for their cue to perform and as the audience claps/tunes in, TLC throws them each a tasty snack/$.  Gabe gets an extra treat for being able to produce tears on command.

ETA:  I actually feel sorry for the sea lions, these folks, not at all.

Edited April 15, 2019 by kicotan
SeaWorld sucks

[Gothish520]

Have to say as someone who has been critical of Gabe that I was impressed with him here, and Hunter as well. I definitely felt for Gabe when he became emotional while discussing the move and how Hunter helped him deal with things. 

[kicotan]

6 hours ago, Rabbit Hutch said:

Frank questions I'd like to phone in, but I will never get a chance:

1. How come y'all are so proud to be sisterwives, but can't stand the thought of even sharing a stove amongst you for as few as 3 or 4 WEEKS? Looking at y'all, CHRISTINE and ROBYN!

2. How come Christine had to get MyKankles to travel in from Utah to babysit Truely while she was a Lulacruzin, and not get sistaRobyn to help with Truely, since she lives in the SAME town?

3. How come Robyn's house is so much bigger than Christine and Janelle's and, why can't the kids double up while in the RENTALS?

4. Why do y'all let Cootie run around off his leash so much? It's gotta be bad for plyg business, as he looks deranged.

5. Cootie, that man-bun has got to go.  Folks are  cracking their nut laughing at you, for rill.

6. Janelle, hun, you need to STRIVE for quittin time, for no one's buying you as a health coach.

These people, sheesh.  😒

The answer to ALL of your questions can be found in the dogma of their unique Brownonism religion.

Kody leads, the women who flirted with him/approached him with the expressed desire to be his plural wife according to their spiritual calling (because in their world, men who show interest/flirt with women are gross and disgustink) agreed to follow his lead.

There is no “make” or “let” Kody do anything.  They sought him out, revealed to him that God Almighty led them to be one of his spouses and upon his acceptance, surrender to him.

Edited April 15, 2019 by kicotan
Spelling

[NotinKansasanymore]

1. This host is lame. She reminds me of an undergrad psych student. Let's get a real talk show host to ask the tough questions! 

2. Wow 4 years later and the extent of Kody and Meri's relationship is he called her once to go to dinner. 

3. Good lord!  who saw Tony in the preview for next week. That boy is easily 300 pounds. 

4. Hello Robyn you are in plural marriage! Isn't it selfish to want Kody to promise only you that Flagstaff is your forever home? I mean there are three other wives in the picture, what if they want to eventually move? So is it only you and Kody's decision in your eyes if he promises you.

5. What exactly are you so busy doing  janelle that you are lazy and have to put in an effort to see the rest of the family? This is the woman who's suppose to motivate others to strive? 

[Just Wondering]

It appears one of the fruits of The Principle is enmeshment. 

[Finchers]

Hunter and Gabe made me cry. Such awesome brothers. 

I was impressed with Meri and Kody expressing honesty about the state of their union. 

[Joan of Argh]

Janelle's gut has gotten so big it literally sits on her lap 

A couple more years and she'll be a prime candidate for My 600 lb Life.

And why couldn't Gabe go to his dad for support, why did he have to rely on Hunter... Oh ya I forgot his dad has his hands full keeping Robyn and her kids happy.... To hell with Gabe.

[kicotan]

8 minutes ago, Joan of Argh said:

.. To hell with Gabe.

Awwwww, come on now, I bet he’d make a FINE addition to the Theater Club at his new school.  He pulls off that poor, misunderstood, abused by his selfish parents, riddled with teenage-angst character with flair.

Heck, with a few voice lessons and basic dance classes under his belt, he might have a marvelous career at The Flagstaff Community Theater.

Don’t sell him short.

[Joan of Argh]

38 minutes ago, kicotan said:

Awwwww, come on now, I bet he’d make a FINE addition to the Theater Club at his new school.  He pulls off that poor, misunderstood, abused by his selfish parents, riddled with teenage-angst character with flair.

Heck, with a few voice lessons and basic dance classes under his belt, he might have a marvelous career at The Flagstaff Community Theater.

Don’t sell him short.

I do feel bad for him even though ya he's playing it up and it's getting old.

When he said he had no one to talk to I had to roll my eyes a bit since nowadays kids his age spend a good portion of their day and night texting and he could still do that with all his Vegas friends... This isn't the 1860's Little House on the Prairie.  🙄

[deirdra]

Did Garrison or Day'un say anything in the "Tell All"?  Garrison has a lot of Kootie's mannerisms - staring into space while "listening" then twitching into a new head position and staring in another direction or at his fingers etc, like a kid who cannot sit still.

[Tabbygirl521]

Ugh, listening to Kody pontificate about the money Meri needed to buy the B&B, knowing what a financial mess he caused with the stupid, poorly planned Flagstaff move, is making me nuts.

Also, I wish I had a nickel for every time he said Me or I when he should have included all the adults. My kids. My needs. What is right for me. What a freaking jackass. 

Tony looks like a giant Weeble with a bad wig. 

Edited April 15, 2019 by Tabbygirl521

[Joan of Argh]

1 hour ago, deirdra said:

Did Garrison or Day'un say anything in the "Tell All"?  Garrison has a lot of Kootie's mannerisms - staring into space while "listening" then twitching into a new head position and staring in another direction or at his fingers etc, like a kid who cannot sit still.

If they said something I honestly don't remember.

I remember the others all saying something but not those two. 😮

[Delete]

3 hours ago, NotinKansasanymore said:

1. This host is lame. She reminds me of an undergrad psych student. Let's get a real talk show host to ask the tough questions! 

2. Wow 4 years later and the extent of Kody and Meri's relationship is he called her once to go to dinner. 

3. Good lord!  who saw Tony in the preview for next week. That boy is easily 300 pounds. 

4. Hello Robyn you are in plural marriage! Isn't it selfish to want Kody to promise only you that Flagstaff is your forever home? I mean there are three other wives in the picture, what if they want to eventually move? So is it only you and Kody's decision in your eyes if he promises you.

5. What exactly are you so busy doing  janelle that you are lazy and have to put in an effort to see the rest of the family? This is the woman who's suppose to motivate others to strive? 

FT also looks like he’s transitioning. Mooriah and Oddry aren’t  the only lesbian couple in the fambly. 

The only thing Janelle is striving towards is the refrigerator.  

[Soobs]

Kodi and Meri's physical awkwardness is because they are like a new couple.

[MissTeacher13]

My thoughts:

1. Did anyone else notice that most of the moves were before any of the bonus wives joined the family? 
2. Robyn seemed pissed this episode.
3. Christine is still current #1.
4. Why does Meri stay? Just leave. No one will judge you.
5. I can’t wait to see what their reactions are to the Mega McMansion plan.

[ginger90]

Meri must have missed a text about live tweeting. She’s the only one who did for this one. Here’s one:

[llewis823]

8 hours ago, NotinKansasanymore said:

4. Hello Robyn you are in plural marriage! Isn't it selfish to want Kody to promise only you that Flagstaff is your forever home? I mean there are three other wives in the picture, what if they want to eventually move? So is it only you and Kody's decision in your eyes if he promises you.

5. What exactly are you so busy doing  janelle that you are lazy and have to put in an effort to see the rest of the family? This is the woman who's suppose to motivate others to strive? 

I was thinking the same thingk about Robyn acting as if SHE is the center of the universe in regards to moving. And did you get her comments (more than once) that "THEY" are all like that meaning non-committal in regards to moving again. I enjoyed her being shot down and the others making her look bad.

And Janelle - she was doing so good there for awhile. But I swear I think she looks bigger than she ever has. And like you, I was thinking "What makes her busy??????"

[Kyanight]

This was the most boring bit of useless drivel.  The only part I thought was interesting was when the kids were there (Gabe and Hunter, etc.).   It's amazing to me how they can make an entire season around almost nothing. 

We took Ysabel to the doctor- nothing really new to report.  We are moving.  We move.  Meri and Kody aren't close.  Now we will do a "Tell All" at the end to go over all of this again and show you exciting scenes from the season.

Mkay.

Edited April 15, 2019 by Kyanight

[ChicksDigScars]

15 hours ago, xwordfanatik said:

Nope, this Tell-All will be a lot of lying, pissy looks, Kootie man-spreading and crowing.  You know, just like the other Tell-Nothingks.  One difference I noticed is that Kootie is sitting between Christine and of course, wife favorite Robo.  I don't remember ever seeing that configuration before on these year-end "specials."  

Oh yeah, I noticed. My first reaction was, "Look, he's sitting between the two wives that he still deigns to stick his dick into."

And on the other couch....the two he tolerates, but doesn't sex up. 

[Tuxcat]

I still don't understand why their rentals are so far apart if they all think being close is a priority. Wish they'd answer that question. When they looked for rentals in Vegas they were purposefully within 1 mile of each other.

It seems, they are interacting with each other only because TLC is making them. It's clear from this Tell Nothing - that they rarely speak to each other in a group setting. I assume Robyn and Christine's daughters get together - but that's it as far as family interaction.

Edited April 15, 2019 by Tuxcat

[Countess]

What really stood out for me is that when Gabe was talking about being closer with siblings, the only person he mentioned was Gwen. He doesn’t give a crap about Aurora, the other “triplet.” He and Gwen really do look like twins though!

[Reality police]

8 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

I do feel bad for him even though ya he's playing it up and it's getting old.

When he said he had no one to talk to I had to roll my eyes a bit since nowadays kids his age spend a good portion of their day and night texting and he could still do that with all his Vegas friends... This isn't the 1860's Little House on the Prairie.  🙄

That made me wonder what kind of cell plan they have. Can you imagine?

[Twopper]

8 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

Janelle's gut has gotten so big it literally sits on her lap 

A couple more years and she'll be a prime candidate for My 600 lb Life.

And why couldn't Gabe go to his dad for support, why did he have to rely on Hunter...

I was half asleep when I watched this.  Mr Twopper was eager to see GoT so we watched the last episode from last season before watching the first episode of this last season.   It is hard for me to watch any TLC show when it first airs because they show "coming up" scenes, then have commercials which always include something I hate (comfort inn hotels, the gold bear gummies, or Big World, Little Folks), then show a recap of what we just saw.  I am so grateful to watch on DVR and then FF thru that stuff.

I did notice Janelle had a rather large "apron" or fupa as I think it is called.  I don't recall noticing it being so big before so I wondered if maybe she was sitting differently than in earlier "tells."

There is no way Gabe would get support from Kody about the move since Kody is all about the move.   I was going to ask who was sitting next to Grendolyn, but someone said it was Garrison.  Why was he there if the moderator wasn't going to ask him at least one question?  Also Dayton made no comments, either. 

32 minutes ago, Tuxcat said:

I still don't understand why their rentals are so far apart if they all think being close is a priority. Wish they'd answer that question. When they looked for rentals in Vegas they were purposefully within 1 mile of each other.

They all act like independent units.  (I think of them as 4 separate tribes).   Based on the motto about all going together, I would think that there would have been a concerted effort to get rentals closer together.  The best would rented apartments in a complex, but from a filming standpoint that would almost certainly be unworkable. 

[Kohola3]

4 minutes ago, Reality police said:

That made me wonder what kind of cell plan they have.

Friends and Polygamist Family Plan.  85 phones for the price of 1.

[Tabbygirl521]

I think the main answer to why Meri didn’t leave is, she still loves Kody. I do think she also loves the kids. But it’s really all about Mr Scrunchie.  Now that he deigns to actually call to ask her to dinner (say what? On another wife’s rotation night? If not, why did he CALL Meri? Why wasn’t he with her?), she’s hoping with all her heart that their love will rekindle. Maybe it will, I dunno. Where will find the time?

I have been pulling for her to do whatever makes her happy after (IMO) being treated horribly by Kody when he was all googly about Robyn, and she cops to struggling with jealousy and heartbreak each time he added a wife. The other wives had a better idea of what they were getting into. Meri, I believe, thought she did but the reality broke her heart. 

Last night she genuinely looked happy when they were talking about improvements in their relationship. I wonder if the balance among the wives is shifting. There was some lip service about how trouble in one relationship affects them all but I felt like Janelle is the only one who just sails along and is OK with whatever Kody does with the others. Christine and Robyn seemed subdued. I’d love to know how much more time, if any, Kody is spending with Meri and whose time is lessened to make up for it  and of course he’s zooming all over Flagstaff to see all his kids! Seriously, let’s see an actual time log  

i was extremely annoyed by the interviewer calling everyone “guys.” 

[ChicksDigScars]

1 minute ago, Pegasaurus said:

And when Gabe was opening his heart and weeping, none of the others, w/ exception of Hunter, barely reacted.  Aurora sat right next to him like a stone. Not even a small pat on his arm.  I'm hoping it was because they were on camera. 

Aurora was probably thinking, "Hey, he's stealing my schtick. Only I get to blubber on camera to emphasize a point." 

[Lady of nod]

16 hours ago, Sandy W said:

Plains of Plague

priceless!

[MakingBacon]

Maybe Kody is getting closer to Meri because she  is the only wife who is going to make him feel like a king by kissing up to him right now and she is the only wife with a separate income  who can help in these tough financial times since the houses aren’t all sold. 

[RedheadZombie]

8 hours ago, deirdra said:

Did Garrison or Day'un say anything in the "Tell All"?  Garrison has a lot of Kootie's mannerisms - staring into space while "listening" then twitching into a new head position and staring in another direction or at his fingers etc, like a kid who cannot sit still.

Has Garrison ever spoken on camera?  Why was he even on the couch?

[Kohola3]

8 minutes ago, RedheadZombie said:

Has Garrison ever spoken on camera?  Why was he even on the couch?

It's the only way he gets his allowance?

[Kyanight]

20 hours ago, tinaw said:

I want Sobbins head to explode. That would make me happy

I'm really disappointed.  I liked your post this morning.  Then I ended up reading your post again - and wanted to like it again - but I couldn't.  There should be an option where you can give a hundred likes on a post.......

[Tabbygirl521]

I don’t blame Robyn for advocating to stay put this time. I am not convinced she planned and plotted for Flagstaff, either. But even if she did, they all agreed for whatever reason and launched another of their trademark nightmare moves. Who would want to do yet another, especially because one move always equals two moves because they have to rent, then build. And building is a nightmare in itself. Even Janelle, who claims not to mind, looked worn out and depressed during this last move. And each wife seemed on her own to look for housing and get her move accomplished. Maybe it was the editing...

Their current situation makes no sense to me, at all. The haste of it all, wasting money on giant rentals (does TLC pay their rent??), allegedly not even having a clear idea of what they want to build (can’t wait for Kody to spring the house plan on them) yet apparently planning as if they will all be housing a dozen people or more... it’s crazy. 

[laurakaye]

Spoiler

Are you ready for a riveting, tearful, edge-of-your-seat, no-holds-barred tell all?  If so, go to your tv provider and search for “Dr. Phil,” ‘cause this ain’t it.

The following is a recap of what might be the most boring episode of television in the history of forever, so if you nod off while reading, don’t worry – I plan to nod off while typing.

So!  We have SuChin Pak as our new moderator, and I’m sure she prepared a list of hard-hitting topics about the “perks” of polygamy!  It took me awhile to figure out where I recognized her from – she was on MTV’s Cribs and Total Request Live back in the day.  So now we know she’s a serious journalist!

And then we have the guests of honor, Kody Brown and the Kodettes.  The first thing I noticed is now awful each of them looked.  Have none of them heard of “Color Me Beautiful?”  It is that hard for four women to understand what colors don’t look good on them?  Meri is wearing a salmon shirt under an olive green blazer, two colors that I would not have EVER thought to put together.  But hey – she’s a LuLaRoe consultant and I’m not, so what do I know.  Her posture is typically defensive – arms and legs crossed.  Of course, she’s on the naughty couch next to Janelle, she of “Strive” fame.  Janelle’s stomach is literally spread across her lap, and while I don’t mean to shame, I ask once again – how is she a health coach?!?  She’s wearing a black blazer with a shiny blue shirt underneath which may or may not be accenting her belly but either way, she’s man-spreading because I doubt she can cross her legs anymore.  Christine, who knocked our socks off a couple of episodes ago in a stunningk yellow blouse, looks like she’s going to a job interview circa 1987 in a navy blue blazer ensemble.  Robyn is wearing a patterned shirt under a green cardigan, and this looks just like something I would’ve worn to work in the early 90’s with a pair of black stirrup pants.  Kody is sitting between Robyn and Christine and while his scrunched curls have seen better days, at least this time he’s not wearing more makeup than Meri.

SuChin starts with asking about the big move to Flagstaff.  Janelle says that she’s a hippie at heart and could just randomly travel aimlessly wherever the wind takes her, leaving her kids to follow behind her and pick up the pieces of their shattered youth.  Meri’s theory is to “bloom where you’re planted.”  Kody blathers some nonsense about wanting his kids to consider Flagstaff their hometown and hopes they come back after they’ve graduated.  Of course, in order for any of his kids to consider a place “home,” they need to know that they’re not going to be uprooted and given between 48 hours and two months to pack up and move once again.  Robyn has made Kody promise that this is the last move, and Kody jokes that she’s going to hold him to that.  What the other wives want doesn’t particularly matter, it’s Robyn who gets to decide whether they stay in Flagstaff or move again.  Wow, I sure didn’t see that coming.

Now we move on to everyone’s favorite topic – The Catfish (drink)!  Flashback to several awkward scenes of Meri crying, and crying, and also one of her crying some more, and then my favorite scene at the restaurant where she tells everyone not to be surprised if she up and bails.  Kody says that the entire time they were in Vegas, he and Meri were dilling with a “bad, funky energy,” but the move to Flagstaff miraculously left all those bad filling behind to rot, along with some unused cow organs, in the cul-de-sac.  So maybe that’s what the fam’ly was running from – not balloon mortgages, but bad energy!  Whew – I’m so relieved to know that they had a very good reason to move.

Kody and Meri talk about how they’ve had to mourn the relationship they once had and now they are starting over, they have a new baseline, moving in a positive direction, blah blah therapy soundbites blah.  BUT – here’s the kicker – Meri actually looks happy.  She gazes at Kody with sparkly eyes and nary an orange tear in sight!  And Kody, like, actually smiles at her!  No stony caveman death glare!  It’s almost as if these two are rekindling their romance, which would explain why Robyn sat stonily like a chin-sized statue next to Kody during this odd little exchange of googly-eyes.  Of course once Robyn could interject, she explained how it affected the whole fam’ly when Meri and Kody weren’t good with each other, and how Robyn could not “do the family” without Meri.  Well, of course she couldn’t…who would she have manipulated into divorcing Kody for the sake of Day’unAuroraBrianna if not for Meri?  As if Robyn isn’t even there, Meri talks about how one night she was swamped trying to cover up the holes in her latest batch of LLR legging when Kody called her to ask her on a dinner date, and even though Meri had tons of work to do, she dropped everything and told him, “I’ll be there, baby!”  Ew.  Also, yuck.

Now the teen Brownies are introduced.  Garrison stifles a yawn, as do I.  We flashback to Kody explaining the move to Flagstaff.  SuChin asks Gwen how she likes Flagstaff, and Gwen says that the boys in Flagstaff are taller and hotter.  Aurora, truly her mother’s daughter, yammers about how she’s had both positive and negative reactions to her plyg family.  SuChin asks Gabe if he’s settled in Flagstaff, and he says that he is, but it was a very hard transition, and that his older brother Hunter helped him through it.  Gabe starts to cry, and Gwen stares up at the ceiling, which is also what I do when I don’t want to cry.  Hunter says that Gabe handled the move much more maturely than Hunter did when they were forced to flee Utah, a move that haunts him to this day (well done, Kodoof).  Gabe says that Hunter was the one who was always asking Gabe if he was doing okay, and I can tell that while Kody was off making babies with his latest plaything, the older Brown kids were busy helping each other through life.  So why Kody thinks that he is building a foundation in Flagstaff as a place for his kids to return to, I don’t understand, as he’s never been particularly interested in what his shenanigans have done to his children not named Sol or Arabeilliola.  Jerk.

We flashback once again to the move – particularly, the long, warm, passionate, awkward hug between Kody and Caleb.  Kody watches this with tears in his eyes.  Robyn, aware that she is probably on camera too, expertly turns on her eye-booger machine and squeezes out a tear of her own while the other three wives look on impassively.  More blah-de-blah about being apart, how they have to make an effort to see each other now, etc.  Janelle finally wakes up from her nap on the couch and says that in Vegas she was lazy about making time to see her sister wives, but now in Flagstaff, if she gets a call saying that the family is meeting for dinner, she has to make an effort to get up off the La-Z-Boy, dust the Doritos crumbs from her lap, and go to dinner no matter how badly she doesn’t want to.  So, that’s sweet.

Now, buckle up for a rip-roaring, knee-slapping flashback-fest of the wives and Kody doing their version of “swearing!”  We hear “what the flock?”  We hear “poop” and “poo-poo head” and then we see Kody flip the bird!  Oh my goodness, hahahahaha!  I’m glad I was already half-asleep in bed or I might’ve ROTFLMAO!  You guys, polygamists are SO FUNNY!!  

Mercifully, we come to the end of this spellbinding episode, because there’s only so much non-drama I can take in one hour’s time.  We segue to the B&B in Parowan (drink) and flashback to Meri shedding tears because her family refused to write her a check for $40,000 on the spot.  Kody says that initially, the B&B didn’t pass his “sniff test” (whatever) so he wasn’t good with the whole plan, and Meri asks him, “are you good with me now?”  Kody and Meri lock eyes across the crowded couches…time slips away....angels singk...and we are told that the answer is “TO BE CONTINUED.”  How am I supposed to sleep not knowing if Kody is good with Meri?!?  How, I ask you, how…………….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZ………….

NEXT WEEK: Fat Tony!  Hahaha, I can't wait!

Recap of the Tell-All.  Hope you have a cup of strong coffee nearby...