Darcey & Jesse: Cougar Town

[spankydoll]

6 hours ago, Turquoise said:

I'm a couple years older than Darcey is supposed to be, with a son Jesse's age. I look young for my age, and have been mistaken for my son's older sister more than once. The thing is, I wasn't trying. Darcey tries SO HARD..."See, I'm still cute! I'm still hip!" that I think it ages her more. She's not an ugly woman, she just needs to stop acting like she's in competition with her daughters.

Supposed to be. Lol. Exactly. And you are dead on - buying her clothes at Forever 21 isn't doing her any favors. 

[Kath94]

15 hours ago, Landlord said:

OMG guys I figured it out. The why Darcy looks like a hobbit beside Jesse. It's her shoulders! She is short, but her shoulders are so broad and boobs so large it does her no favors. 

Between that and the short dresses/shorts/ripped/distressed jeans, I mean, the girl supposedly works in fashion. You'd think she would know how to dress to hide those flaws? She was much cuter on the images I saw from her twin show (AND THAT WAS ONLY 7 YEARS AGO!!!) Midlife crisis much?

Omigosh!  Jesse is MAX HEADROOM!

[Major Bigtime]

MAX!!! LOL, haven't thought of him in years, but you nailed it!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!! I cannot unsee this, ever!!

[Baltimore Betty]

4 hours ago, spankydoll said:

Supposed to be. Lol. Exactly. And you are dead on - buying her clothes at Forever 21 isn't doing her any favors. 

Maybe she should try shopping in Forever 51.

[biakbiak]

Darcy was apparently on Million Dollar Matchmaker last year.

[Arwen Evenstar]

5 hours ago, Kath94 said:

Omigosh!  Jesse is MAX HEADROOM!

Haven't thought of him in years.  Thanks for the laugh.

[Awfarmington]

He also resembles Johnny Bravo...

[ChiCricket]

5 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Darcy was apparently on Million Dollar Matchmaker last year.

 Darvey's (ex) husband had a Dutch-boy haircut. Guess she has a type.

[Arwen Evenstar]

1 hour ago, ChiCricket said:

 Darvey's (ex) husband had a Dutch-boy haircut. Guess she has a type.

Maybe she should try a guy with the Augustus Gloop look.

[LeeluDallas]

On 8/30/2017 at 5:15 PM, biakbiak said:

Darcy was apparently on Million Dollar Matchmaker last year.

that was so surreal lol that pilot for her failed reality show.... ohh my - shame bc she really was quite cute but you could already see the plastic fantastic creeping in...

19 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

 Darvey's (ex) husband had a Dutch-boy haircut. Guess she has a type.

So Darcey goes from THIS muppet to Max Headroom?!  umm  I have no words lol her story is becoming weirder by the hour..

[Desert Rat]

On 8/30/2017 at 2:15 PM, biakbiak said:

Darcy was apparently on Million Dollar Matchmaker last year.

She looked more natural there.  She can actually smile since her lips are not over-inflated with fillers.  

[checker]

Like Darcey, we all know--Jesse is a keeper.

Edited September 1, 2017 by checker

[Grumpy Lobster]

I cannot stop thinking about the humiliation and possible trauma that Darcey is causing her daughters. Teenagers can be quite cruel, and with the so much internet & social media in our lives, I imagine it is quite easy to make life of a youngster a true hell. 

My mother has lost our father some time ago. And even though she is 10 years older than Darcey, and I am way past my teenage years, we did discuss the possibility of my mother having a companion in forseeable future. My sister was not happy with the idea (but she had a closer relationship with our father than I did). and I am fine with it. We also joked about my mother pulling a Darcey and getting herself a nice hot 25-something lamb. My mother laughed histerically, and said that she already had two kids and was not planning to have another one. 

There is no companion in sight at this point, however I do have my concerns. Would that be a good man? Would he be decent? Would i be able to accept his presense in our lives? My sister doesn't even want to think about it. For her this is a betrayal. But we are adults with our own lives. We can always shut the door and do not communicate with that guy for the sake of our mother's happiness. 

Here we deal with two young vulnerable girls that do not have enough life experience and are still dependent on their parents. They also happen to actually have their biological father regularly present in their lives. I believe that the introduction of a new male figure should be more gentle, and yes, kids should be prioritized, not the six-pack of the guy. 

[guilfoyleatpp]

On 8/29/2017 at 5:49 PM, Landlord said:

OMG guys I figured it out. The why Darcy looks like a hobbit beside Jesse. It's her shoulders! She is short, but her shoulders are so broad and boobs so large it does her no favors. 

Between that and the short dresses/shorts/ripped/distressed jeans, I mean, the girl supposedly works in fashion. You'd think she would know how to dress to hide those flaws? She was much cuter on the images I saw from her twin show (AND THAT WAS ONLY 7 YEARS AGO!!!) Midlife crisis much?

WTF is going on with Jesse's right leg in this photo? or where his right leg should be? Is that a rug? His legs aren't hairy (I thought maybe it could be a lot of hair).

I'm so confused by the photoshopping.

[Catseyes34]

On 21/08/2017 at 3:33 AM, greekmom said:

The ring, the mentioning of FB status, the buildings for weddings and honeymoons. Why doesn't she just get down on one knee and propose to him? So desperate. So sad.

You can see she's desperate by the trashy way she dresses and the amount of botox and filler she's got in her face.  As for him, he's just weird.  Huge head on sloping shoulders, ghastly haircut, totally controlling and already having doubts about her. Taking her on a bike ride in a strange and very busy area within hours of her landing and then shouting commands at her to keep up was awful and made her look totally ridiculous, if not comical.  What a disastrous pairing.

[Lily247]

I dont really understand the ripped jeans in that photo of her and Jesse, on her left leg the rip is so big that the jean leg basically becomes a tattered jort ... I think for someone who is under 35 a couple rips at the knees is okay but it really does seem too "youthful" and teenybopper for a grown woman (or man). 

[Catseyes34]

On 21/08/2017 at 9:13 PM, spankydoll said:

Jesse looks baffled by her behavior. Baffled. I did some on line dating for a bit. When I was a rookie I would spend WAY too much time and effort talking, texting, flirting, etc. with my potential dates. Honestly it isn't worth too much effort before you are in the same room together - be it pheromones, their photo is 20 years old, they are rude to the waiter, a million things can go South. Jesse is in a fix now because Darcy CLEARLY does not resemble her photos but they have built all of this history and intimacy. He probably thinks that she is a nice person and sweet which she is AND he is stuck with her for six weeks. I would guess that based on his small apartment that he can't afford to put her up at a hotel. And she ain't gonna fly home early of her own accord.

I'm intrigued as to why they arranged for her to stay six whole weeks. That's a long time if you're away from your family and staying in a luxury hotel, let alone confined to a cramped apartment thousands of miles from home with a rather controlling, domineering young man who clearly thinks a great deal of himself. Taking her to meet his peculiar family so soon after arriving must have freaked out the poor woman, especially after being told by the mad looking stepfather that she "wasn't in the same league" as Jesse.   

18 hours ago, LeeluDallas said:

that was so surreal lol that pilot for her failed reality show.... ohh my - shame bc she really was quite cute but you could already see the plastic fantastic creeping in...

So Darcey goes from THIS muppet to Max Headroom?!  umm  I have no words lol her story is becoming weirder by the hour..

Max Headroom?  I KNEW Jesse reminded me of someone! LOL

[Catseyes34]

On 29/08/2017 at 5:00 AM, Desert Rat said:

I can only imagine how humiliated Darcy's poor daughters must be watching their mother.  Imagine those poor girls seeing their mother in bed telling the camera that her sleep was amazing, or her love interest admitting that they had intimacy, or flashing a huge ring she purchased for herself, or talking about having a baby with that guy, or talking about his Facebook status, or constantly talking about marriage.  The torment at school must be unbearable.  Maybe dad will take these tapes to court to get full custody.  Darcy is unfit. 

You have to wonder what sort of what sort of  suppposedly mature woman, a mother of two young daughters, goes halfway round the world to meet someone she's never met in person, then embarks on a physical relationship the first night they meet (after the creep has told her to remove her make up first). She implied several times that she hadn't been in a "relationship" for six years  but that's no excuse.

25 minutes ago, Matias130 said:

I dont really understand the ripped jeans in that photo of her and Jesse, on her left leg the rip is so big that the jean leg basically becomes a tattered jort ... I think for someone who is under 35 a couple rips at the knees is okay but it really does seem too "youthful" and teenybopper for a grown woman (or man). 

I don't understand ANYONE wanting to wear ripped jeans.  How the fashion designers and retailers must be laughing at all the gullible idiots who spend good money to walk around looking like they've just had an encounter with a shark.  Apart from being very unattractive, they must be so draughty! LOL

[lovesnark]

On 8/29/2017 at 5:49 PM, Landlord said:

OMG guys I figured it out. The why Darcy looks like a hobbit beside Jesse. It's her shoulders! She is short, but her shoulders are so broad and boobs so large it does her no favors. 

Between that and the short dresses/shorts/ripped/distressed jeans, I mean, the girl supposedly works in fashion. You'd think she would know how to dress to hide those flaws? She was much cuter on the images I saw from her twin show (AND THAT WAS ONLY 7 YEARS AGO!!!) Midlife crisis much?

Her lips look like she had them re-inflated. Wearing clothes meant for tweens, teens and young women does not make you look younger, Darcey. It makes you look like hell.

[Desert Rat]

32 minutes ago, Catseyes34 said:

You have to wonder what sort of what sort of  suppposedly mature woman, a mother of two young daughters, goes halfway round the world to meet someone she's never met in person, then embarks on a physical relationship the first night they meet (after the creep has told her to remove her make up first). She implied several times that she hadn't been in a "relationship" for six years  but that's no excuse.

I don't understand ANYONE wanting to wear ripped jeans.  How the fashion designers and retailers must be laughing at all the gullible idiots who spend good money to walk around looking like they've just had an encounter with a shark.  Apart from being very unattractive, they must be so draughty! LOL

This 100%.  I have teenagers and I can't imagine in a million years wasting my time chasing some guy on the other side of the planet. Those shenanigans can wait till the kids are out of the house. In the meantime, Darcy needs to find a way to pursue her fantasies or achieve orgasm that does not interfere with her parenting responsibilities.  

Women over 40 should not wear ripped jeans. Actually, it's stupid on everyone.  How did this become a thing?

[AZChristian]

Just now, Desert Rat said:

Women over 40 should not wear ripped jeans. Actually, it's stupid on everyone.  How did this become a thing?

We walk laps inside our local mall every morning for exercise.  I almost took a picture of a window in a store that featured all ripped jeans so I could caption it, "No, this picture was NOT taken at Goodwill."

[CofCinci]

Jesse has quite the receding hairline that he hides with his haircut.... 

[Nancybeth]

Darcey looks much better in this still shot from her failed reality TV show pilot:

 

I realize it was 7 years ago, but I think part of it is the extreme tanning and bronzer and countouring, and also her face was a tiny bit more natural and full there.  Now she's had way too much botox and work done.

[Granny58]

On 8/21/2017 at 5:11 PM, LocalGovt said:

In my 20s, I found myself worrying about a boyfriend seeing me without makeup on.  That was a wake up call for me.  After that day, I wear only a minimum of makeup (like, eyebrow pencil to fill in my disappearing eyebrows) -- maybe a little mineral powder and mineral blush if I'm feeling like dressing up.    I've also read (don't know if it's true) that most men don't like a lot of makeup on women. I know my husband doesn't. And that's fine by me!

Off topic but handy hint - if your brows are disappearing, consider that you may have low thyroid function and see a doctor.  

[peaceknit]

47 minutes ago, Granny58 said:

Off topic but handy hint - if your brows are disappearing, consider that you may have low thyroid function and see a doctor.  

Thinning head hair too. Ask me how I know! It's never come back fully, but part of it is probably because of menopause.

[Mrs. Hanson]

22 hours ago, Grumpy Lobster said:

I cannot stop thinking about the humiliation and possible trauma that Darcey is causing her daughters. Teenagers can be quite cruel, and with the so much internet & social media in our lives, I imagine it is quite easy to make life of a youngster a true hell. 

My mother has lost our father some time ago. And even though she is 10 years older than Darcey, and I am way past my teenage years, we did discuss the possibility of my mother having a companion in forseeable future. My sister was not happy with the idea (but she had a closer relationship with our father than I did). and I am fine with it. We also joked about my mother pulling a Darcey and getting herself a nice hot 25-something lamb. My mother laughed histerically, and said that she already had two kids and was not planning to have another one. 

There is no companion in sight at this point, however I do have my concerns. Would that be a good man? Would he be decent? Would i be able to accept his presense in our lives? My sister doesn't even want to think about it. For her this is a betrayal. But we are adults with our own lives. We can always shut the door and do not communicate with that guy for the sake of our mother's happiness. 

Here we deal with two young vulnerable girls that do not have enough life experience and are still dependent on their parents. They also happen to actually have their biological father regularly present in their lives. I believe that the introduction of a new male figure should be more gentle, and yes, kids should be prioritized, not the six-pack of the guy. 

I don't want to get off topic but may offer some advice as someone who has been there?  Your mom is a grown woman - she can date or not date.  Please gently tell your sister to not to be difficult if your mom does find a companion.  Your mom liking someone/loving someone is NOT a reflection of her feelings for your dad.  Like you said, you are adults with your own lives.....your mom gets to have one, too.  Love is precious and to find it twice would be awesome.

Back to topic:

On 8/29/2017 at 10:23 PM, bethster2000 said:

Maybe I am aging myself here, but...

...whatever happened to smiling and looking natural in photos?  Why must every female photo look like the subject is twenty seconds away from giving a blow job?  I know, eye of the beholder and all that, but you can't tell me that Darcey looks pretty or happy in the photo above.  It must be exhausting to constantly imitate a Kardashian.

Okay, I laughed out loud at this!!!  No, you can't smile as you must look "cool" and "hip."  Darcy, you are neither.  As for the her ex going for full custody on this issue, I support that!!!  If a guy went off to Europe and was taped (ON FILM!!  People, please....use half a brain!) rolling around post coitus....ugh.  

 

On 8/28/2017 at 11:00 PM, Desert Rat said:

I can only imagine how humiliated Darcy's poor daughters must be watching their mother.  Imagine those poor girls seeing their mother in bed telling the camera that her sleep was amazing, or her love interest admitting that they had intimacy, or flashing a huge ring she purchased for herself, or talking about having a baby with that guy, or talking about his Facebook status, or constantly talking about marriage.  The torment at school must be unbearable.  Maybe dad will take these tapes to court to get full custody.  Darcy is unfit. 

100%!!!

His parents were.....colorful.  "Hey I just met your son and I want to have a baby with him!!  Got baby names all picked out!"  Bitch, step back.

[LeeluDallas]

8 hours ago, CofCinci said:

Jesse has quite the receding hairline that he hides with his haircut.... 

Unfortunately for him, I feel like all it does is accentuate it! lol

[ChiCricket]

10 hours ago, Catseyes34 said:

I don't understand ANYONE wanting to wear ripped jeans.  How the fashion designers and retailers must be laughing at all the gullible idiots who spend good money to walk around looking like they've just had an encounter with a shark.  Apart from being very unattractive, they must be so draughty! LOL

Amen to this! My 15 yo granddaughter desperately wanted ripped jeans, and her mom told her "only if you pay for them!"

   She got a summer job as a pool lifesaver, and now that she knows how hard she had to work to get her pay, she says she doesn't want the expensive (ripped) jeans anymore. She happily let her mom buy her nice unripped school clothes.

Oops... to keep it on topic, I wonder how well Darcey's company really does.

Edited September 2, 2017 by ChiCricket
'Cuz I wanted to :)

[7isBlue]

On 9/1/2017 at 11:28 AM, CofCinci said:

Jesse has quite the receding hairline that he hides with his haircut.... 

They both have unfortunate hairlines. Could that be a wig she's wearing? The way her hair falls from her center part is suspect. I can't get over how different her hair looks from that photo from her twins reality show. 

She's so immature. I cringe every time she "hints" about getting married. 

Edited September 3, 2017 by 7isBlue

[gonecrackers]

Her hair seems much thicker now, which isn't typically the way things happen, unless it's enhanced somehow.

To me Jesse's mom seemed uncomfortable & if she was I understand. It was uncomfortable just watching.

[booboopbedoo]

On 30/08/2017 at 4:38 AM, Major Bigtime said:

She graduated from the same fashion expertise school as Kyle Richards.

I was thinking Tammy Faye Bakker  

[Lily247]

I was watching the scene with Jesse and his friends and I did notice that none of Jesse's friends seem ethnically Dutch - Erdem (turkish) Ray (seemed African) and Piotr (polish/slavic). I just thought that it was quite interesting and it seemed like a UN meeting or something. Since the guy is an ex military who wears trenchcoats, I would have expected his friends to also be a bunch of blonde headed preppy disciplined whatevers. I just thought it was kind of amusing. One friend has got a man - bun, another an eyebrow ring, and the third (the polish looking one) looked kind of thug-gish. 

I wish that TLC would just let these people talk in their native language to each other and provide subtitles instead of having them speak in staged English that also comes off as rehearsed. 

Edited September 3, 2017 by Matias130

[orangeiguana]

I grew my hair as long as her extensions when I was a teen. Guess what? I gets stuck in your ass crack all the time with shit stuck to it. Sexy time! She's actually very pretty (and seems quite nice and kind) and if she just had bra-length hair, laid off the lip fillers/caterpillars and wore sheath dresses with 3" classic heels, she'd be gorgeous. I like the dark hair, too. 

[Desert Rat]

50 minutes ago, orangeiguana said:

I grew my hair as long as her extensions when I was a teen. Guess what? I gets stuck in your ass crack all the time with shit stuck to it. Sexy time! She's actually very pretty (and seems quite nice and kind) and if she just had bra-length hair, laid off the lip fillers/caterpillars and wore sheath dresses with 3" classic heels, she'd be gorgeous. I like the dark hair, too. 

And laid off the bronzer/tanner and spider lashes.  And she must stop talking about marriage. PERIOD.

[Meowwww]

I am 46 and have super thick long hair. It would never rival extensions like Darcey has. And hers look good....compared to Pao from 90 day happily ever after.  

Darceys hair is too dark, and her face is puffy from fillers.  I lived in LA for many years so I can spot chemical intervention from 10000 feet.  

[jaybird2]

these people are so, so sad!

[DVDFreaker]

On ‎9‎/‎1‎/‎2017 at 1:40 PM, Nancybeth said:

Darcey looks much better in this still shot from her failed reality TV show pilot:

 

I realize it was 7 years ago, but I think part of it is the extreme tanning and bronzer and countouring, and also her face was a tiny bit more natural and full there.  Now she's had way too much botox and work done.

She was a cutie, it is a shame she ruined her looks by doing plastic surgery! 

[Snarkasm]

19 hours ago, DVDFreaker said:

She was a cutie, it is a shame she ruined her looks by doing plastic surgery! 

What a shame, she looks in her 50s now and is well on her way to looking like Joyce Wildenstein. 

[Catseyes34]

On 03/09/2017 at 9:42 PM, Matias130 said:

I was watching the scene with Jesse and his friends and I did notice that none of Jesse's friends seem ethnically Dutch - Erdem (turkish) Ray (seemed African) and Piotr (polish/slavic). I just thought that it was quite interesting and it seemed like a UN meeting or something. Since the guy is an ex military who wears trenchcoats, I would have expected his friends to also be a bunch of blonde headed preppy disciplined whatevers. I just thought it was kind of amusing. One friend has got a man - bun, another an eyebrow ring, and the third (the polish looking one) looked kind of thug-gish. 

I wish that TLC would just let these people talk in their native language to each other and provide subtitles instead of having them speak in staged English that also comes off as rehearsed. 

English is the second language in Holland and spoken widely so it's not surprising that several different nationalities are conversing in the one common language they all speak.   Europe is a melting pot of nationalities these days, as is the UK, so much so that it's almost a rarity to hear an English voice in London these days.

[checker]

On ‎01‎.‎09‎.‎2017 at 7:20 AM, guilfoyleatpp said:

WTF is going on with Jesse's right leg in this photo? or where his right leg should be? Is that a rug? His legs aren't hairy (I thought maybe it could be a lot of hair).

Nobody's perfect!

[Lily247]

5 hours ago, Catseyes34 said:

English is the second language in Holland and spoken widely so it's not surprising that several different nationalities are conversing in the one common language they all speak.   Europe is a melting pot of nationalities these days, as is the UK, so much so that it's almost a rarity to hear an English voice in London these days.

Yes, I noticed that too. At first when watching this scene I really almost thought te show was trying to make a political statement or something, like a message about diversity or refugees. Lol. 

[LeeluDallas]

17 hours ago, Catseyes34 said:

English is the second language in Holland and spoken widely so it's not surprising that several different nationalities are conversing in the one common language they all speak.   Europe is a melting pot of nationalities these days, as is the UK, so much so that it's almost a rarity to hear an English voice in London these days.

Yes I think that is one of my favourite parts about living in London or Dam - you get to meet so many interesting ppl from all over the world =) and you don't have to go too far hehe

[Snarkasm]

On 8/25/2017 at 11:51 AM, Desert Rat said:

Nope, I can't let my eyes go there.  

Camel toe?

[bethster2000]

On 8/24/2017 at 9:39 AM, Baltimore Betty said:

Greasy. Desperate.

Stinky.  Unclean.  Nasty.  Goes to bed with an unwashed face.  Drenches herself in perfume instead of freshening up after a long flight.

She's gross.

[1TrashTVAddict]

I'm confused. Anyone here from Connecticut? They only sell shirts with built in chokers? Who does she think she's kidding? Is she hiding her plastic surgery scars or the Age rings around her tree trunk neck?  Poor Darcey....and it's a "whirlwind" romance, not "worldwind." Poor thing...

[CofCinci]

This week --- she wore a choker above a choker.  WTH!

[spankydoll]

I want choker shirts for when I am 60!!!!!  My neck still looks good thanks to troweling on La Mer. But the clock waits for no one.

 

Darcy is screwing herself with her late 80's rock star styling. You know how Johnny Depp and Alice Cooper look like asses in their bracelets, leather and crosses? That's what Darcy looks - like mutton dressed like lamb. She doesn't have to go full on Eileen Fisher but she could get some cute things at a place other than Forever 21. She is just not cool. At all

9 minutes ago, 1TrashTVAddict said:

I'm confused. Anyone here from Connecticut? They only sell shirts with built in chokers? Who does she think she's kidding? Is she hiding her plastic surgery scars or the Age rings around her tree trunk neck?  Poor Darcey....and it's a "whirlwind" romance, not "worldwind." Poor thing...

[bethster2000]

52 minutes ago, spankydoll said:

Darcy is screwing herself with her late 80's rock star styling.

Yeah, she was SO cool last night in her distressed The Who shirt.  I'll bet Darcey Dumbass can't tell you what "we are, we are, we are the mods" means.

[spankydoll]

5 hours ago, bethster2000 said:

Yeah, she was SO cool last night in her distressed The Who shirt.  I'll bet Darcey Dumbass can't tell you what "we are, we are, we are the mods" means.

I was trying to figure out what the shirt was! I couldn't see because she cut out the front of it! She loves holes in things. Does her fashion line sell strictly shredded items?  Jesse looked so put together in his suit - he looked like a defense attorney bringing a client before the judge. Not sure what type of crime I would think that Darcy had committed...

[Toaster Strudel]

1 hour ago, spankydoll said:

he looked like a defense attorney bringing a client before the judge

One that specializes in the criminally insane!