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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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29 minutes ago, NotthebadVictoria said:

He said no we won’t be pregnant this year and she looked shocked and questioned it, and then he kind of laughed it off. It was awkward. He eventually said they won’t have a baby this year because it’s impossible but she looked flustered from his original comment.

He's the headship. If he doesn't want Jill to be pregnant she will not be pregnant. He's not Bin.

Jill would have to be doing some reproductive coercion stuff in order to get pregnant when Derick doesn't want her to be. I don't think she's conniving enough to get her way. 

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She’s running out of ways to get attention.   Recycling mecipes ( thanks to who came up with that accurate name!). Not posting bad modeling photos..... she’s about to get desperate 

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Just now, libgirl2 said:

Poor kid..... any parent recognizes when their kid has to pee! 

Why film that and post it?  Just leave the poor kid alone and take him to the bathroom.

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3 hours ago, NotthebadVictoria said:

He said no we won’t be pregnant this year and she looked shocked and questioned it, and then he kind of laughed it off. It was awkward. He eventually said they won’t have a baby this year because it’s impossible but she looked flustered from his original comment.

Oh my...the scented lotion is not doing the trick...

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Of course language evolves, but there is rarely the need to replace a word or term with something else that means EXACTLY.THE.SAME.THING. 

Evolution denotes some type of change.  I'm talking about re-naming just for the sake if it, with no change in substance.  

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7 hours ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

There are so many reasons to dislike Derick, but him deciding to put a stop on the Baby Train is not one of them.  As long as Jill keeps on making boneheaded decisions while in labor, she needs not bring another life into this world.

If they stop the baby train, praise be. I may respect him for some thing. 

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10 hours ago, ginger90 said:

So, where were they for this video?

It may be a good idea to teach Israel not to pull from the cord when unplugging the charger from the outlet. 

Derick said, “We won't be pregnant this year". Jill said, “We’ll,  you don't know that”. Then Derick said they won’t be “having a baby this year.”.

When asked about a new season of Counting On, Derick said he doesn’t know, he “checks the internets” for that information.

I have mixed feelings about this. 

I understand that Derick may not want more children and I feel he has a right to feel like that. I can understand why he feels they're not ready for more kids. Kids are a lot of work. He's in law school right now. There are financial concerns and plenty of other reasons to put off having kids. And Derick should have to right to feel as he feels.

But I also understand a little how Jill feels.  She was brought her whole life that having a large quiver is the point of life. I grew up Catholic and see similarities between Jill and some Catholics I know. She wants more kids and she may want a daughter. She must know at this point she will probably never have 19 kids or even 10 kids and yes I tend to think that's a good thing. Still she has right to feel as she feels.  Also leaving behind a group like IBLP is really hard. Putting beliefs that birth control is morally wrong is also really hard. 

It sounds like Jill and Derick aren't really doing anything to prevent pregnancy, based on Jill's insistance that Derick couldn't know if they were going to be pregnant this year. Headship or not, he may not be able to talk into something that goes against her beliefs that much. Jill is still  quiverfull since she/they put the quiverfull Psalm (127) on the boards of their house. I don't like the idea that Jill should blindly follow Derick, because he's a man. On the other hand, it's easier to decide whether to have a baby when there is none on the way.  Derick also has right to think it's not a good time.

Derick is right that it's too late for them to have a baby this year since Jill is not pregnant. Anna Marie Maxwell and even quite a few people I know have announced pregnancies due 2020. 

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21 hours ago, truebluesmoky said:

She’s live right now finishing up cooking dinner. She does look pregnant, but then again, so would I in that outfit, as a mom who had two kids and likes carbs. 😂

7784C6F6-EBAE-4B18-A156-D473F361B271.jpeg

Is that her new house? The light/fan looks awfully low.

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28 minutes ago, Temperance said:

I have mixed feelings about this. 

I understand that Derick may not want more children and I feel he has a right to feel like that. I can understand why he feels they're not ready for more kids. Kids are a lot of work. He's in law school right now. There are financial concerns and plenty of other reasons to put off having kids. And Derick should have to right to feel as he feels.

But I also understand a little how Jill feels.  She was brought her whole life that having a large quiver is the point of life. I grew up Catholic and see similarities between Jill and some Catholics I know. She wants more kids and she may want a daughter. She must know at this point she will probably never have 19 kids or even 10 kids and yes I tend to think that's a good thing. Still she has right to feel as she feels.  Also leaving behind a group like IBLP is really hard. Putting beliefs that birth control is morally wrong is also really hard. 

It sounds like Jill and Derick aren't really doing anything to prevent pregnancy, based on Jill's insistance that Derick couldn't know if they were going to be pregnant this year. Headship or not, he may not be able to talk into something that goes against her beliefs that much. Jill is still  quiverfull since she/they put the quiverfull Psalm (127) on the boards of their house. I don't like the idea that Jill should blindly follow Derick, because he's a man. On the other hand, it's easier to decide whether to have a baby when there is none on the way.  Derick also has right to think it's not a good time.

Derick is right that it's too late for them to have a baby this year since Jill is not pregnant. Anna Marie Maxwell and even quite a few people I know have announced pregnancies due 2020. 

I do agree.   The feminist in me wants to say that it's her body and her choice to have another child, but Jill is a SAHM who is married and Dericks opinion has to matter.  Marriage is about compromise and if Derick is not 100% on board with another child, then Jill needs to respect that.  

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2 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I do agree.   The feminist in me wants to say that it's her body and her choice to have another child, but Jill is a SAHM who is married and Dericks opinion has to matter.  Marriage is about compromise and if Derick is not 100% on board with another child, then Jill needs to respect that.  

Jill has a right to have another child, but she isn’t allowed to coerce Derrick into having another or sexually assault him to get his sperm (I’m not saying she would do that just being dramatic). 

So if Derrick doesn’t want another child, and Jill does, Jill can choose to have one without him. (I would also say this vice versa)

If one partner really wants a child, and one partner does NOT equally want said child, the equitable thing is to not have a child (Or split up and have a child on your own or with another partner). 

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2 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Jill has a right to have another child, but she isn’t allowed to coerce Derrick into having another or sexually assault him to get his sperm (I’m not saying she would do that just being dramatic). 

So if Derrick doesn’t want another child, and Jill does, Jill can choose to have one without him. (I would also say this vice versa)

If one partner really wants a child, and one partner does NOT equally want said child, the equitable thing is to not have a child (Or split up and have a child on your own or with another partner). 

Agree. IMO, it's far better to regret not having a child, than regretting having a child.

A no vote should win. And then as you mentioned work it out together or make independent choices that work for you.

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7 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

Jill has a right to have another child, but she isn’t allowed to coerce Derrick into having another or sexually assault him to get his sperm (I’m not saying she would do that just being dramatic). 

So if Derrick doesn’t want another child, and Jill does, Jill can choose to have one without him. (I would also say this vice versa)

If one partner really wants a child, and one partner does NOT equally want said child, the equitable thing is to not have a child (Or split up and have a child on your own or with another partner). 

I have a different perspective other than the rights of either one.  The points of consideration include the danger to Jill of another pregnancy, whether they are capable of doing well by another child when it could be argued that they aren't doing that well by the two they have, over-populations and excess use of resources and other things.

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4 minutes ago, Suzn said:

I have a different perspective other than the rights of either one.  The points of consideration include the danger to Jill of another pregnancy, whether they are capable of doing well by another child when it could be argued that they aren't doing that well by the two they have, over-populations and excess use of resources and other things.

Well yes, I agree with that philosophy, but I was referring to what Jill and Derrick would consider. I highly doubt they give two thoughts about what’s best for Israel, Sam or society as an entirety in their choice to have children. 

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1 minute ago, Scarlett45 said:

Well yes, I agree with that philosophy, but I was referring to what Jill and Derrick would consider. I highly doubt they give two thoughts about what’s best for Israel, Sam or society as an entirety in their choice to have children. 

Of course, you're right.  They would only think of what they want.  It's just that making a momentous decision that way is childish and they are childish in many ways.

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2 hours ago, PikaScrewChu said:

There are so many reasons to dislike Derick, but him deciding to put a stop on the Baby Train is not one of them.  As long as Jill keeps on making boneheaded decisions while in labor, she needs not bring another life into this world.

In the past, we've speculated that Josh (who clearly doesn't want more children, either) might slip off and have a secret vasectomy. Obviously, he hasn't and I think it's very unlikely that he ever would, if only because he's too much of a coward and lacks the opportunity. I think he's watched like a hawk, not allowed out in public without an accountability partner and not trusted to handle money on his own. 

Derick, on the other hand, could be a plausible candidate for a secret vasectomy. He has much more personal autonomy than Josh  and I doubt that he'd have any qualms about deceiving Jill or breaking one of the strictest taboos of his faith. I think he's so firmly convinced of his own righteousness that he can justify any action he takes as God's will.

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3 minutes ago, Albanyguy said:

or breaking one of the strictest taboos of his faith.

I don't think it is a strict taboo of Derick's faith.  He's Southern Baptist and none of them that I know have restrictions on use of birth control.  They're usually opposed to abortion, but none of the SBC members I know are Quiverfull.  

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Just now, Absolom said:

I don't think it is a strict taboo of Derick's faith.  He's Southern Baptist and none of them that I know have restrictions on use of birth control.  They're usually opposed to abortion, but none of the SBC members I know are Quiverfull.  

It seem likely Derick's mom controlled how many children she had.

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Deciding to  have a child is not the same as deciding on a movie to watch- or going to the movie by yourself while spouse stays home, we aren’t talking an afternoon, we are talking 18 years of on site and then the rest of your life of off-site parenting. Our oldest child is 38- i still consider  him when making certain decisions. I still worry about him. 

Its not right to just ignore your spouse when he says I don’t want to add another child to the rest of our life. 

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3 hours ago, leighdear said:

Of course language evolves, but there is rarely the need to replace a word or term with something else that means EXACTLY.THE.SAME.THING. 

Evolution denotes some type of change.  I'm talking about re-naming just for the sake if it, with no change in substance.  

That's been happening throughout history, and each generation complains about the one after it. 

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(edited)
1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Is that her new house? The light/fan looks awfully low.

It’s some secret location they did not disclose in the video. It is not their new house. 

(For a gas stove, the hood should be between 24" and 30" from the cooktop, where I am. Codes vary.)

Edited by ginger90
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41 minutes ago, Temperance said:

I agree with so much that has been said. I think Derick and Jill need to sort this out amongst themselves--- off camera.

I just don't know why any one of the ever would answer this question publicly LOL. I would think the answer would be "Well never say never" or "Man plans, God laughs" or "We will see1" I mean, truly, why even answer?

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1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

It’s some secret location they did not disclose in the video. It is not their new house. 

(For a gas stove, the hood should be between 24" and 30" from the cooktop, where I am. Codes vary.)

From that photo it looks like some kind of old RV. Although why one would decide to whip up a batch of chicken broth in a camper surpasseth my understanding...

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35 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

From that photo it looks like some kind of old RV. Although why one would decide to whip up a batch of chicken broth in a camper surpasseth my understanding...

During the video, Derick walked over to a door and opened it. It showed what looked like bleachers in a gym. It was just a quick shot, perhaps someone else saw it better.

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2 hours ago, Absolom said:

I don't think it is a strict taboo of Derick's faith.  He's Southern Baptist and none of them that I know have restrictions on use of birth control.  They're usually opposed to abortion, but none of the SBC members I know are Quiverfull.  

No, we believe in birth control. I had my tubes tied after #4. I was an only and wanted a large family.

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Clearly Jill wants to have another baby, and soon. Derick doesn't appear to be in any hurry. If I was Derick I'd take matters into my own hands and keep a close eye on Jill's menstrual cycle lest God mysteriously decides to bless the Dills with a 'surprise'.

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14 hours ago, judyjudyjudy said:

Honestly, I think all Derelict was saying was that since it's July and she isn't pregnant now, it's "biologically impossible" for them to have a baby this year.  I think people are reading too much into it.

I think your right. Derick thinks he's all kinds of smart and funny by answering questions in a misleading and indirect way. 

Unfortunately Jill misunderstood him too. And it was filmed. 

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If they can't afford another baby, I can't blame Derick for saying no right now.  That doesn't mean they can't try again in the future.   I don't think Jill has any clue what it costs them to live.

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(edited)
17 hours ago, MamaMax said:

I just don't know why any one of the ever would answer this question publicly LOL. I would think the answer would be "Well never say never" or "Man plans, God laughs" or "We will see1" I mean, truly, why even answer?

Those are EXACTLY the responses that Jessa always gives.  

And haven't the Dillweeds always lied blathered on about adopting kids?  Maybe that's what Deertick was referring to. 

He & Jessa are the king & queen of non-answering misdirection.  

Edited by leighdear
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12 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Those are EXACTLY the responses that Jessa always gives.  

And haven't the Dillweeds always lied blathered on about adopting kids?  Maybe that's what Deertick was referring to. 

He & Jessa are the king & queen of non-answering misdirection.  

I think Jessa and Ben talked about adopting. Not sure about Jill and D.

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4 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Jessa always teases adoption when someone else is pregnant and she isn't getting enough attention. I can't remember if Jill has ever mentioned it or not.

In DA, she posted a picture of her holding a baby girl in an orphanage.  She said they may come home "with one".

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On 7/17/2019 at 9:24 PM, tabloidlover said:

What size is a “super extra large” zucchini?

A former colleague of mine gifted some of us with zucchinis from her garden. They were at least a foot long and 4-5 inches in diameter. The skin was a lot tougher than the regular-sized ones, so maybe that explains what would otherwise be double the cooking time. She should probably have included a reduced time for regularly-sized veg. 🤷‍♀️

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