Jump to content

Type keyword(s) to search

Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Guest

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

  • Reply
  • Start Topic

Recommended Posts

Re: the invitation, if it just says "Mr. & Mrs. JB invite you blah, blah, blah...." , does this mean JB & Mullet are paying for the whole wedding ? No $ from the Dillards or from Derrick himself ?

 

 

It used to be customary for the people who paid for the wedding (one set of parents, both, or the parents and the couple together) to issue the invitation in their name(s).  But I'm not sure that's a rule that's really followed anymore.  So I wouldn't necessarily read too much into it.

 

And, yes.  That is turkey bacon.  We eat it at my house all the time because I have kids who won't eat the real stuff.  No, I don't think they're mine, either.

  • Love 5
Link to comment

I think the Duggars are being underestimated. I believe they are able to differentiate between medical professionals and sexual nudity. I am hoping that Jill will be influenced by Derrick and pursue higher education. Soon she will be in a different situation.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

From what I have seen, Jill may be the only really motivated Duggar girl. She knows what she wants and seems to be trying to get it despite her idiot parents and any and all barriers put in her way. If Derick is supportive and I haven't seen anything to indicate that he won't be, I think Jill has a chance to be a certified midwife with a RN or at least I hope so. I don't think Jill has drank all that coolaid but is good at going along to get along.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

Sadly, it is logical and obvious to me that Jill would NEVER be able to continue her medical training beyond "unofficial baby birther" because of the real world, life training she would need to be any type of RN, LPN, CNA.....etc. She's still not allowed to anywhere by herself, so how can she view the human body, male and female alike, even for study? It is also a contradiction in her personal plans to continue study and assisting at deliveries as she stated that she wants babies, asap and that would prohibit her from "working outside the home". I don't know what Derick thinks of these practices, as he has never stated what they have talked about regarding the style of their own lives once married. I am secretly hoping that Derick is "toting the party line" until the wedding, just to get Jill married, then he implements some normal lifestyle in his household, and Jim Bob, really could not criticize Derick's household, as his religious beliefs state: Jill needs to obey HER husband from then on. Only time will tell. ***BTW, I mean absolutely no disrespect to actual nurse/midwives when I used the term "unofficial baby birther"... I was referring to Jill's "out of the loop" kind of training. There are many highly qualified professionals out there who do this work, but I don't think that Jill will ever achieve that status.


Also, Jim Bob and Michelle are showing what classless people they really are. A wedding invitation such as theirs, being a highly publicized "Christian ceremony" should state the parents' Christian names. I am sure Jim Bob doesn't appear on his birth certificate, nor did they refer to him as JimBob at his baptism. His Christian and legal name is James Robert..as it should appear on the invitation. They have no class or manners, really.

  • Love 6
Link to comment

After having seen Jill's Pinterest, which links to the Bates girls and lots of other fundies, I observed that they are heavily into engagements, weddings, births, modern modest clothing, make-up,  styling long hair, home-schooling....and everything else we already see on the show.

 

Therefore.....my predictions for Jill.......

 

She will have a baby by next year, and lots more after that.

 

She will never wear pants.

 

She will probably be a midwife assistant (is that what she is now?) until she has her own kids....probably no more schooling.

 

They will live in Arkansas.

 

She will homeschool.

 

She will be as happy as a clam with this scenario.

 

Derick knows what he's getting into ...there will be no surprises.

  • Love 5
Link to comment
(edited)

I think the Duggars are being underestimated. I believe they are able to differentiate between medical professionals and sexual nudity. I am hoping that Jill will be influenced by Derrick and pursue higher education. Soon she will be in a different situation.

Jill cannot be trusted enough to go by herself to a birth without her sister because she might be tempted by what she sees. Her mother has her sisters following her cycle every month. Her parents rub it in her face that she is not allowed to have sex yet, but they can. She is only allowed to see patients who follow her parent's beliefs. Plus, the sad fact is she has to get her husband's approval to be able to seek higher education because her father will pass his authority he has over her to Derrick, and another sad fact is once she has her first child any job or education opportunities will fly out the window.

Edited by bigskygirl
  • Love 1
Link to comment

After having seen Jill's Pinterest, which links to the Bates girls and lots of other fundies, I observed that they are heavily into engagements, weddings, births, modern modest clothing, make-up,  styling long hair, home-schooling....and everything else we already see on the show.

 

Therefore.....my predictions for Jill.......

 

She will have a baby by next year, and lots more after that.

 

She will never wear pants.

 

She will probably be a midwife assistant (is that what she is now?) until she has her own kids....probably no more schooling.

 

They will live in Arkansas.

 

She will homeschool.

 

She will be as happy as a clam with this scenario.

 

Derick knows what he's getting into ...there will be no surprises.

If she will be happy as a clam then, good for her. That's all anyone could hope for.

  • Love 7
Link to comment
(edited)

 

Re: the invitation, if it just says "Mr. & Mrs. JB invite you blah, blah, blah...." , does this mean JB & Mullet are paying for the whole wedding ? No $ from the Dillards or from Derrick himself ?

My spouse (or his parents) did not pay any money for our wedding. They paid only for the rehearsal dinner (which I don't think invitations were sent for, just word of mouth/traditional expectation).  Their names also didn't appear on our wedding invitation, I don't think- just my parents names as those doing the inviting, and my name and his name as those being married.  Derrick's parents at least got a mention on their invite.

 

As for "Jim Bob". The invitation isn't a formal invitation, so no need to use a formal name, IMO.

It doesn't look like a save the date to me- for one, it says "request the honor of your presence" which is an invitation, and two- the wedding is like a month away. You "save the date" when it is like a year away.

 

Their food looks like typical brunch to me: toast with jam, cinnamon roll, and turkey bacon.

Edited by Skittl1321
  • Love 1
Link to comment

I think that's a "Save the Date" invite so many are doing these days. I would expect from them, they'd do the typical wedding invite with the cursive embossed writing. Save the dates are more informal, come before the invite and often have a pic of the bride and groom holding something that has their wedding date. Hopefully, there on the real invite will be "James Robert".

  • Love 1
Link to comment
(edited)

I'm okay with the invite. I think it's cute and modern. Not the fancy ,expensive, dorky looking (IMO, of course), old fashioned kind. Not everyone has to follow Miss Manners Rules of Wedding Etiquette letter by letter. Maybe this is what they want. Casual.

 

As for wedding expenses, it seems that Fundie weddings just have a cake and finger food reception in the church hall after the ceremony. No big reception with bands or sit down dinners, and DEFINITELY no open bar, or even a cash bar. Damn. I'd pay money to see Jim Boob and Joshie slamming beer at an open bar! I don't think they do the fancy restaurant rehearsal dinner either. So, the groom's parents seem to get off easy. All the fun stuff is usually their responsibility, while the bride's parents get the formal stuff, which is all the Fundies seem to do. 

 

Please keep John David away from the car. Toilet paper, balloons, (root) beer cans tied to the bumper, shoe polish messages on the windows, and saran wrap are fine and fun, but the vaseline, sardines, moth balls and bullspit like that, are vandalism and NOT funny. Those girls paid a lot of money for their dresses and might want to save them, and Smuggar 2.0 thinks it's FUNNY to put an open can of smelly, greasy, oily SARDINES under the seat? If I were Erin Bates, I would have kicked JD in the fruit stand for that one. And in a RENTAL CAR that someone is going to have to pay damages on? No. Just NO. Grow the hell up, John David. 

Edited by ChicksDigScars
  • Love 6
Link to comment

I like them a lot as a couple. I think their invite is cute as well although I'm pretty much over the barn/farm/rusty truck thing that seems to be fashionable now. If it's a "save the date" they're really late on sending it out.  I do feel like Jill really has a chance on making a semi-normal life with him, and I hope I'm right.

Link to comment

If I was a brand new mother, I would NOT want my birth team to be visited by ANYONE of a personal nature. Derick visited Jill at a birth center, and held a newborn? It's not his place to be there, nor is it his business. It's intrusive and so not professional; it's a totally private time for the mother , baby, and THEIR family. I'm disappointed in them if this is true.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Yes, but she will be under the authority of her husband. She probably will be allowed only to work with people who follow her and Derrick's beliefs.

Good thing Derrick's beliefs are a little more tolerant of other views and cultures. Jill isn't doomed.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

Nobody knows if Jill is not doomed yet. Everything and the relationship seems a little too perfect. Plus the only way for her to escape the life she has now is to get married to a man she only has known for a short period of time and who was pick by her father.

Link to comment

Floridamom, I agree with you about Derrick visiting the birth center but doesn't Jill only work on people who have the same religious beliefs as the Duggars. I bet they all know each other and are family friends.

Link to comment

I think that the birth center that Jill works with isn't all that fundie. I remember last season when she was on a birth one of the fathers was bare chested and that is not a fundie thing.

Link to comment

Good thing Derrick's beliefs are a little more tolerant of other views and cultures. Jill isn't doomed.

We know nothing about Derick's beliefs. Yes, he went to an actual college and his mother (at one time) wears pants, but that doesn't mean Jill is going to deviate at all from the plan for women set by her faith. I see Derick has a recent convert and probably has the fervor like a stereotypical Born-Again Christian.

  • Love 1
Link to comment
(edited)

I doubt she would be allowed to be involve in non-fundie births. JimBoob probably has to approve the families she work with.

I doubt she would have been able to get this far into her training if she was only working with hardcore fundies. A lot of uber-Christians choose home births/birthing center births, but so do a lot of hippies/uber-liberals. It's where left meets right.

Also, I maintain she probably doesn't want to become a nurse/CNM. If her interest is home births and birth centers, the vast majority of practitioners who do them are CPMs, not CNMs. In some states CNMs can only deliver in a hospital, and I suspect that's not what she's interested in.

Edited by alt0233
  • Love 2
Link to comment

I really hope Jill has one or two children and then resumes her career.

Many of us assume that ALL the Duggar girls will be blessed with excellent fertility, but that doesn't always happen.   For all we know, Derick has fertility issues.   Not that I would wish that upon them, but I don't think 20+ children is going to be the norm for all of them.

 

Once out of the watchful eye of Jim Bob and Michelle, Jill may blossom.  If Derick encourages her to pursue her career, I think that would be great for her.

  • Love 2
Link to comment

If the story is true, I agree it's inappropriate for Derick to visit her at the birth center. I used to work at a medical building and if Mr. BitterApple came by to take me to lunch or whatever, he would wait out front in the car or meet me in the lobby. Nobody's spouses came into the waiting room of the doctor we worked for.

I don't know much about birth centers vs. hospitals, but I'm assuming that sort of behavior would be frowned upon, particularly in a maternity ward.

Link to comment

I had a random thought this morning. Anyone remember the play "Fiddler on the Roof"? One of the daughters falls in love with the tailor and has to convince her father to convince her mother that she should marry the tailor and not the old widower they picked out for her. He does so with a super convoluted "dream" that he claims he had to the mother, and that it was an omen that the daughter should marry the tailor.

 

I can't help but wonder...Derrick supposedly wanted to be a "prayer buddy" for Jim Bob, but what if he and Jill had somehow already met, and Jim Bob came up with a big old cover. It's farfetched, sure, but it would explain why Mullet is so grumpy about the whole thing, and why Jim Bob has been so (relatively) respectful to Derrick...they all already know each other because they're engaged in this bizarre farce to save face/convince Mullet this marriage is a good idea.

 

Of course, if the Duggars are "Fiddler on the Roof", it means they'll lose one daughter to someone of another religion and another to a communist...

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I'm not sure but here's another thing I find odd: tonight's epi will feature Derick buying Jill's e-ring in Israel, with film crew in tow. It seems odd to buy a ring after only having met the person one time. Not to be a bitch, but Jill's ring is hardly some custom designed ten-carat Neil Lane. He could have bought it at any jewelry store in the U.S., so was the relationship already further along than we're being led to believe? The whole Fundie courtship thing just baffles me. I can't wrap my head around being engaged to someone you've barely spent any time with.

  • Love 3
Link to comment

Derick does seem like a nice guy , and he isn't bad looking. Jill seems happy which IMO is what matters. However , I agree that I can't see marrying someone that you have never kissed , never have been alone with etc. You are basically marrying them in the honeymoon stage of dating when its all rainbows and unicorns. I mean would Jill even know if Derick has dated , kissed , etc. with any other girls? I don't know if he could tell her that , with chaperons around. To me , it's something she should know about him before the big step of marriage.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I sure hope JimBoob turned over the money that Jill earned by her appearances (she is over 18) on their show and that is how they got that house.  My deep down feeling is JimmyBoob made the ones over 18 sign a release that just he is paid money for their appearances.  I have asked this question of TLC and when they are on morning shows, but they question is never answered of asked of them.  They avoid the money issues.

 

I hope Derrick's mom is able to be an influence for good on Jill.  Her own mom hardly spent any time with her so maybe she can help Jill relax and give her lots of time, as a daughter should have.

  • Love 1
Link to comment
(edited)

The man's past is not important. If he did kiss and does other things, it will be blame on  women for defrauding him. If Derrick abuses or cheats on Jill, the blame will be put on her for not satisfying his needs.

Edited by bigskygirl
Link to comment

Watching the triple date and full frontal hug episode....I really do think that JB loves his kids and I think that the love between Jill & Derrick is palpable..and well pretty cute for a Duggar...Ben still seems awkward.

Link to comment
(edited)

Boy oh boy Derick is well loved here and he seems like a nice guy but he is a DUD.  Jill...said...this hair stuff...spray....good...to keep hair...in place....oy vey.  I hope it's just nerves from being on TV because if he is this dull all the time I feel for Jill.  

 

WHAT IS THEIR STORY???? They have only just met 3 months ago, and for 2 of those months he was halfway around the world.  YOU DON'T HAVE A STORY TOGETHER!!!!  Jill talks like an 8th grader with her first crush (which ironically this is her first at over 20).  I can't believe these people think it's a good idea to get married so fast.  Gosh at least Ben seems to have a sense of humor....

 

And how do the girls have a book about relationships when NONE OF THEM HAVE EVER HAD ONE????? Hello?  Am I missing something here?

Edited by Joan van Snark
  • Love 2
Link to comment

Hey guys!  My bad.  I forgot to start an episode thread for the big proposal episode tonight forcing some of you to post about Jerrick engagement here.  Those posts that were discussing things directly in the episode I have moved to the newly created episode thread.  Please go there to discuss tonight's episode.

 

In the future if I forget to start a thread (cause I don't watch on a weekly basis) please feel free to start one yourself.  You DO NOT need permission. Just be sure to use the Episode Format box and put in the ep number and name. Thanks.

  • Love 1
Link to comment

I am disappointed reading here that they are getting a local home. My wish was that after getting married, they moved to India together to do missionary work. Jill could work on her midwife skills & be away from the oppressive watchful eyes of her parents.

Stuck here, she's just going to be like Anna. Though I like Derrick MUCH better than Smugger!

  • Love 1
Link to comment
(edited)

Is it me, or is Jim Boob different when it comes to Jill, than he was with Smuggar 1.0, or any of his own adult boys, or even with Ben? He seems more intrusive and douchy with the others than he is with Derick. With Jill, he hung back and let Derick and Jill "get to know each other" a little more. He really didn't seem like an asshat while he was talking to Derick on the couch while Derick was asking for Jill's hand. In fact, JB seemed just as nervous about the topic of conversation as Derick was. In fact, Jim Boob was the one whose pallor made me think he was about to vomit right then and there (and this was before exposing himself to the germs in the Vomit Comet Stink Bus).

 

Is it a "daughter vs. son" thing, in that JB is more protective and favors the girls (a natural reaction for a father, I think)? Or is Jill clearly Boob's favorite? I've thought since Day One that Derick intimidates Boob and Mullet, a bit. From Pants Wearing Masters Degree Mama, to an education at a public university, they realize that he's a catch, but he contradicts a lot of their beliefs that those things are the EVIL. 

 

I do think Jill is a JB favorite, which also explains the gifting of a better house than Joshie got! LOL. 

Edited by ChicksDigScars
  • Love 1
Link to comment

 

I do think Jill is a JB favorite, which also explains the gifting of a better house than Joshie got! LOL. 

 

Jill has also earned a better house.  Between all the babysitting she's done for them and the fact that she's actually worked in the family business for years (tv show) she has worked way harder for the Duggar machine than Joshie ever did.

  • Love 7
Link to comment

Did the Duggars say they thought higher education and wearing pants was evil? If they did, they have clearly evolved. I remember at first they dressed like Little House on the Prairie. Maybe they are changing which is a good thing. Everybody should as the get older and have more life experience. I know I have. 

  • Love 1
Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...