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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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I think it's too early to say where Jessa and Ben will end up. The obvious answer is that they'll be on the homestead or in Josh's old house with their own kids and Ben working for JB at whatever odd jobs. BUT Ben strikes me as someone who may have some anger and pride in him. If he runs around at JB's call for a few years and really gets nothing out of it besides dirty toilets to clean, I can see him and Jessa leaving -- to Hot Springs to pursue some other job or to pick up a trade or maybe even an insurance or sales career (which I imagine is why he's even sticking with online classes as you probably need at least an AA degree these days if not a BA). I don't see him waiting forever for JB to hand him a car dealership or get him hooked up to the right people for some kind of job in the fundie world or some kind of DC/political gig.

 

As for why it would be good for him to go from having his life controlled by JB to having it controlled by the military -- bc the military is legit. It is a nationally known credential/job which people have pursued for generations. Meanwhile JB is just making it up as he goes -- if JB thinks it's God's will that Ben clean toilets to prove that he'll do anything to provide, then that's what he will be doing. In contrast in the military -- despite it being regimented -- he could pick up a trade that would be useful in the real world like welding, auto mechanic, etc. or even pursue a degree on the side in something that'll be really marketable when he gets out -- like IT/computers. And while military life is totally controlled through basic and probably initially, the young enlisted married guys I know who aren't deployed have relatively normal lives; they live off post with their wives and kids and do whatever they want with their families during their time off, just like any other working guy. I'm not suggesting that Ben will go into the military, but I do think it's a legitimate path rather than being on JB's life track -- no matter how legit JB thinks he is. 

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I think the JB path is appalling, but I come out of the Appalachian and Rust Belt and know enough people who were sure the military was their way out and ended up with nothing to show for it other than a few years of their life gone. It can really turn someone's life around - I'm not denying that - but I don't think that Ben needs what the military offers. He's hard working, willing to commit himself to something, respectful, and a decent person. Those are often some of the things the military needs to instill - Ben needs a chance to show some independence, initiative and face reality. No better way to do that than trying to go to school and waiting tables and having your wife come home tired from working two jobs and wondering if you still have enough money to pay your tuition bill and the rent.

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Jessa has always resembled Kendra Wilkinson to me.

I picked up on the resemblance when a bunch of KW pix started appearing during the cheating scandal and her new season starting but funny enough even before that I thought Jessa was a Hef type.

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I really couldn't believe THAT kissing photo. How is that modest? Only goes to show that they are all talk......and little else.

 

Can't believe her parents reaction either, which seems to blow up into their faces and rightfully so. Either they are famewhores of the worst kind or else they were horrified as well and want to do some damage control. Well........

 

I'm curious to see how it pans out, they are both immature, selfish, silly and without a clue. Wonder if Jessa will tell her parents to stuff it

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Just checked out Jessa's instagram for the first time in a while -- from her veteran's day message, Ben's grandfather (or great grandfather?) was in the Navy. Interesting. Not suggesting that Ben is enlisting anytime soon, as I can't see Jessa handling being an enlisted soldier/sailor's wife stuck on some base, but it suggests to me that Ben's family may be more "progressive" re school and career planning. Lots of enlisted take classes via the GI bill and some even complete full degrees; maybe Ben and his family aren't affirmatively anti-education like the Duggars.

Something like that isn't a bad option for them - forced exposure to other people, education benefits if he doesn't go career-track, etc - but the older relative served during the draft era. Very honorable and glad they honored him, but it doesn't really indicate anything about the family's values other than that he and they didn't bail to Canada or have the strings to pull to avoid service, if it was wartime.

I think someone has said something here about Ben's taking community college courses and having planned to transfer for his BA - pre-Duggar's - so I also like to take that as a sign that he and his family are open to the benefits of education and/or trade school, depending on his interests and priorities.

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Recently I watched the movie Thanks for Sharing, and there's a scene that shows Josh Gad's character trying to avoid triggers to his sexual addiction while he's out in the city. At one point, while sitting in a public area, he actually gets up and moves simply because a couple in his line of sight is making out. They're not groping each other--just kissing passionately. I immediately thought of the kiss pics. Since they've never missed an opportunity to remind people that they are Married Folks Who Are Getting Some, how can these super-righteous types not consider that a makeout photo might be enough to stir up sexual thoughts for some viewers?  (I mean, granted, Mechelle & Boob's photo makes me never want to have sex again, but I think Jessa & Ben's is pretty hot.)

Edited by Portia
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I think we need to let Ben and Jessa tell us what they plan to do because there has not been a peep out of them as far as their plans. What we think is immaterial. I do not see him joining the military.

I do think they know what they plan to do but have not shared it with us.

I think Jessa was supporting our Veterans, that's all.

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A "better than nothing" move would be for Ben and Jessa to move to where his family live (Hot Springs?) and be under their influence instead of the Duggars.

Maybe Ben's parents would encourage Jessa to get educated and I'm pretty sure they would treat her with respect, unlike how Ben gets treated at the TTH.

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Leave it to a Duggar to have no clue.

The love locks on the bridge are ruining the bridge. Recently, on of the bridges parapets collapsed under the weight of the locks. This is a UNESCO World Heritage Site and Jessa and Ben succumb to American-Duggaresque ignorance. Allegedly, there are now signs and docents who direct or inform tourists that the love locks are damaging the bridge and the keys that had been tossed in the Seine are causing environmental problems. The tradition is only 6 years old and has already caused millions in damages. But, hey...the Duggars are special and rules/cares don't apply.

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I wonder if Jessa came back from the honeymoon pregnant. Wouldn't surprise me.

No birth control. And JimChelle would be furious on why they're not pregnant. Unless Jessa or Ben has fertility issues or decide they don't want kids now

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I wonder if the extended honeymoon has to do with Benessa living in the shed. The idea is for married couples to have privacy to have "sweet fellowship" often enough to produce a pregnancy. If they're going to be living in the shed, it may be that JB and J'chelle don't see their lives at the compound as providing enough privacy for newlyweds.

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Someone posted on Pickles and Hairspray that they saw Ben and Jessa at the Eiffle Tower.  There's a picture of Jessa with one of the crew but you can't really tell where the are.

With the crew being in Paris does it mean their honeymoon was paid by TLC?  Just wondering because I thought they wanted to save as much money as they could on the wedding so that they could have a nice honeymoon.

 

Leave it to a Duggar to have no clue.

The love locks on the bridge are ruining the bridge. Recently, on of the bridges parapets collapsed under the weight of the locks. This is a UNESCO World Heritage Site and Jessa and Ben succumb to American-Duggaresque ignorance. Allegedly, there are now signs and docents who direct or inform tourists that the love locks are damaging the bridge and the keys that had been tossed in the Seine are causing environmental problems. The tradition is only 6 years old and has already caused millions in damages. But, hey...the Duggars are special and rules/cares don't apply.

I saw the pic of their lock and it is huge compared to the other locks around it.

 

edited for grammar.

Edited by abseedee
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I might be in the minority here, but I'm actually happy that Jessa has the chance to go to Paris and enjoy the city with her husband as opposed to her previous international travel where she couldn't do jack shit because she was saddled with her mother's children 24/7. Yet Michelle and Boob made sure to have plenty of "us" time during those vacations. In this case, I don't mind one of the Duggars pimping TLC out for a free honeymoon.

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So are they in Paris now or we think they went immediately after the wedding? Did they go somewhere domestically as well? I swear her IG pictures suggested that she was someplace that looked wooded -- like a cabin or something -- and posted a pic inside what looked to me to be a Cracker Barrel restaurant. I wonder if they did a few days in a mountain cabin someplace -- or maybe just the wedding night -- and then jetted off to Paris; similar to how Erin and Chad Payne were in Tn. at a cabin for a few days and then off to Ireland.

 

Good for them I guess. Jessa's done these kinds of world travels before, but I wouldn't be surprised if Ben has never left the country before. I bet he and his parents are thinking -- see this is why we wanted him marrying fundie royalty -- the Seewalds work hard but with Mike being a windshield repair guy working 12+ hrs a day to support his family, he couldn't have given Ben an opportunity like Paris. I can see why a 19 yr old would be excited by this and would think -- so what if I have to clean a few toilets and be a make shift handyman, if I get perks like this.

 

If Ben and Jessa want to enjoy these kinds of options (which JB would undoubtedly have TLC cut off if they strayed too far from what he wanted), fine -- they should take 1-2 yrs and enjoy vacations, GMA, being on the road to stump for politicians etc. and give TLC access to Ben's "work" for JB and more importantly Jessa birthing babies 1 and 2, who should be on their way within the next yr or 2 anyway. But all the while I hope Ben keeps in mind that he needs to be his own man and support his own family without JB's interference and TLC won't be interested forever -- so I hope he continues online classes, prepping for insurance exams etc. so that once they've had their "fun" and don't feel like one more vacation is worth cleaning another toilet or listening to JB about whatever he wants them to do next, Ben can be on his way to a job in Hot Springs with a plan to find housing and put food on the table.

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The trip is wasted on those who don't know the history of place, or the architecture, or the art, or the philosophers who called Paris home.  Knowledge makes travel worthwhile and so very interesting.  I can't imagine going without a good background to begin with.

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I think they stayed somewhere local for the first few days. Remember, they were back at the TTH a week after the wedding to group kiss with Smuganna. And during that week, Jessa had the time to post a certain "kiss" pic.

 

Pics of them in Paris didn't surface until this past Friday, so I'm thinking there was time home for Bin to catch up on schoolwork between the trips.

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I'm glad that they weren't "called home" because of the kiss pictures as some of us had speculated.

 

While I agree that they would get more out of the trip if they bothered to learn anything about Paris, or France, or anything really, I think they will both get a lot out of it. Unless they just stay in the hotel and have sex -- and that's clearly not the case -- they will learn something. TLC isn't going to film them going from the hotel to McDonalds and back again. I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't visit a lot of the tourist attractions: Eiffel Tower, Louvre, Notre Dame, etc. That's a good start.

 

The whole thing has to be pretty eye-popping for Ben, and it's probably fun for Jessa to take a trip without the whole family in tow. And, jacket or no, that is a low cut shirt -- plenty of clavicle there.

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She sure does!!! I was watching Kendra on Top last night and if Jessa colored her hair they could be twins!

I think its hilarious that you guys think she looks like Kendra W! ha! comparing a young girl who can't even wear pants because she might defraud some male, to a young woman who lived with Hugh Heffner (and his other girlfriends) in the playboy mansion!!! hahahahahahahahaha! :-) 

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I think the JB path is appalling, but I come out of the Appalachian and Rust Belt and know enough people who were sure the military was their way out and ended up with nothing to show for it other than a few years of their life gone. It can really turn someone's life around - I'm not denying that - but I don't think that Ben needs what the military offers. He's hard working, willing to commit himself to something, respectful, and a decent person. Those are often some of the things the military needs to instill - Ben needs a chance to show some independence, initiative and face reality. No better way to do that than trying to go to school and waiting tables and having your wife come home tired from working two jobs and wondering if you still have enough money to pay your tuition bill and the rent.

 

If Ben could get an ROTC scholarship the military could offer him a ton. He has a lot of qualities that could allow him to be an excellent officer. Let the military pay for him to get a college degree and a great job (officer pay is very decent, especially after the first few years).

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I think its hilarious that you guys think she looks like Kendra W! ha! comparing a young girl who can't even wear pants because she might defraud some male, to a young woman who lived with Hugh Heffner (and his other girlfriends) in the playboy mansion!!! hahahahahahahahaha! :-) 

I love me some Kenduh!!! I was on the original Girls Next Door board when it was still on. I think Kendra is gorgeous with or without makeup same with Jessa.

 

Maybe they are the same in a lot of ways since Kendra is a free spirit and given the chance Jessa seems to be too. She picked a pink dress for her wedding and went outside the box and is in PARIS for her honeymoon vs. saying in some Fundie land approved honeymoon spot.

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I think it is great they got to go out of the country for their honeymoon. They are expanding their minds a little!

I do not know if the locks are doing damage to the bridge. Unless I saw signs saying NOT to do it, I would add mine had I the chance. But if signs are posted, well... then no! But a friend of mine said they encourage this and sell locks to tourists for this purpose. I personally cannot vouch either way...

I don't understand why peeps are trying to get him to join the military when he has yet to express any desire to do so. Did I miss something???

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I do not know if the locks are doing damage to the bridge. Unless I saw signs saying NOT to do it, I would add mine 

I don't understand why peeps are trying to get him to join the military when he has yet to express any desire to do so. Did I miss something???

ITA it's not going to be happening anytime soon. The famewhore game is a lot easier and more lucrative  then the military.

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There are signs all over telling people to stop with the locks things, they've already had part of the bridge need to be repaired over the stupid locks, not to mention the trouble the keys thrown in the water have caused.  But it's the current 'thing' so people still do it.  God help them if they try to create some other way of proving their love to the world.  Personally, IMO the best way to prove their love would be to get to know each other and agree on where they want their lives to go, with the understanding that some things won't go according to plan, but to work together to get through it.  They can proclaim their true love if they die old and still in love, with or without children.

 

As for the military, talk about it happened when a poster mentioned that Jessa posted on Veterans Day something about Ben's grandfather being in the Navy.  It led to speculation that maybe Bens family wouldn't try to stop him from joining up if he wanted to, and how much good being in the military could do for both of them.  Ben wants to go to college?  Is the GI Bill still available?  Even if not, he could get job training in other areas.  My ex couldn't afford college, but he got out of the Navy with some very nice training in diesel mechanics, and has had very few problems getting jobs since then.  (We'll not discuss some of the...um...interesting stories of his exploits while in the service, but one thing stands out: the guys who stayed true to their religion and wouldn't take part in the idiocy that young men often do were treated with great respect from the rest of the guys.)  Ben might not even consider a career in the military, but there is a lot of good things that could come from it.

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I think every new marriage for this family will be a good thing because it will open the Duggar spouse's mind a little bit to the world. Whether it's Anna supporting and encouraging Josh to move to DC or Derick taking Jill to a Broadway play and a Nepali restaurant or Jessa and Ben in Paris. Of course the Paris trip only happened because of TLC, but being with Ben rather than JB and the horde of 18 kids -- it's possible that Jessa did experience some local stuff that Ben may have wanted to do. It's possible that Ben wanted to eat crepes or French cheeses so they did that instead of turning up their nose at "foreign" food and heading to the closest McDonalds at every single meal for chicken nuggets.  I think the Duggar kids are so underexposed and closed minded that even these little steps will do a great deal for them.

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From what I understand, enlisting (without being an officer) and then having a wife and a bunch of kids is a guarantee of poverty. Now, if Ben gets in as an officer, he'd have a chance of affording Gothard's Dream - but he needs his degree first.

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^^^This is what I'm saying. I have a nephew who joined, served in Iraq, had duties shipboard that had no "real life" applicability and not to put too fine a point in it, basically wasted four years of his life. The separation wasn't good for his marriage and they split.

I can point to plenty of examples where the military was the best thing the person ever did, but it's not for everyone and I'm not seeing or hearing a reason for Ben to go other than the Duggars have some rhetoric about supporting "the troops" but won't serve. But as far as I know, the Seewalds have not said this (again, they aren't Gothard followers) and Ben has made it clear that he would like to go to college and work behind a desk.

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IMHO, of course, but money is the last thing Benessa needs to worry about. Ben has a contract with TLC. Their wedding was paid for, their honeymoon was paid for, and Jessa is now a legal adult, so any money she is paid for appearing on the show goes to her.

 

They're probably better off financially than any of us think. Plus, the "rebellion" may be her way of getting additional attention from TLC re: a spinoff. They're not paying for more of the same; they can get that with Jill and Derick. Imagine the fun if Benessa decides to up the stakes and get a job, for instance.

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There are signs all over telling people to stop with the locks things, they've already had part of the bridge need to be repaired over the stupid locks, not to mention the trouble the keys thrown in the water have caused.  But it's the current 'thing' so people still do it.  God help them if they try to create some other way of proving their love to the world.  Personally, IMO the best way to prove their love would be to get to know each other and agree on where they want their lives to go, with the understanding that some things won't go according to plan, but to work together to get through it.  They can proclaim their true love if they die old and still in love, with or without children.

 

As for the military, talk about it happened when a poster mentioned that Jessa posted on Veterans Day something about Ben's grandfather being in the Navy.  It led to speculation that maybe Bens family wouldn't try to stop him from joining up if he wanted to, and how much good being in the military could do for both of them.  Ben wants to go to college?  Is the GI Bill still available?  Even if not, he could get job training in other areas.  My ex couldn't afford college, but he got out of the Navy with some very nice training in diesel mechanics, and has had very few problems getting jobs since then.  (We'll not discuss some of the...um...interesting stories of his exploits while in the service, but one thing stands out: the guys who stayed true to their religion and wouldn't take part in the idiocy that young men often do were treated with great respect from the rest of the guys.)  Ben might not even consider a career in the military, but there is a lot of good things that could come from it.

Your ex wasn't able to use his GI Bill to go to school? And yes, vets are still offered college benefits, I think you have to serve at least 3 years active and have an honorable discharge.

When I was in the Army, you had to put money aside for the GI bill, IIRC, it was 100.00 a month for a year? Something like that...but I think the new GI Bill offers much more than what I received when I was in the service. I had enough money to get an AAS, but I do believe that the new GI Bill will pay for much more. I'm not sure, though.

When I was in the Army, there were some people who were pretty hard core fundies, but I wasn't, really, so I wouldn't know the inside scoop on how tightly knit their circle was. I worked in the chaplains' office in my hospital command briefly (when I was pregnant and on light duty)...one chaplain was a Catholic priest and was pretty mainstream, the other was a hard core fundie, was into that Promise Keepers' mess and all that. He was pretty nice, but he was a bit annoying sometimes. Ben with his mindset would fit right in to that world of fundies...haha. Might blow his mind to have to work with a Catholic priest, though...haha! (someone like him would make a great chaplain's assistant).

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Do they need to worry about money now? No, probably not, but they have sixty more years (God willing) and twenty kids to make it through. The show will not last forever, either because of a scandal, changing trends or boredom on the part of the viewer. I'm sure they're hoping for a spin-off, but what's compelling tv about a conservative young woman home-schooling and raising 2-4 kids. I think most of us can get a fairly accurate taste of that exciting and dramatic life from our Facebook feeds.  

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A Duggar Family blog is saying that the producers have heard the audience and are showing a sneak peek of Jessa's wedding during the season finale.  The full wedding will be shown in the spring.  

 

The timing is so effed up.  If they're filming Jill's pregnancy and plan to show the birth, how will that coincide with the airing of Jessa's wedding?

 

They could and should do a special about her wedding and be done with it.   

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A Duggar Family blog is saying that the producers have heard the audience and are showing a sneak peek of Jessa's wedding during the season finale. The full wedding will be shown in the spring.

The timing is so effed up. If they're filming Jill's pregnancy and plan to show the birth, how will that coincide with the airing of Jessa's wedding?

They could and should do a special about her wedding and be done with it.

By the time Jessa's wedding is shown she will probably be ready to deliver

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If the show goes off the air in the next year or so, due to either controversy or worsening ratings, I think things might be difficult for Jessa and Ben financially. He isn't yet finished with college and is not working full time. Despite whatever they are earning from the show now, I don't think the money would last more than 3 -5 years. Especially if they start having kids immediately.

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If the show goes off the air in the next year or so, due to either controversy or worsening ratings, I think things might be difficult for Jessa and Ben financially. He isn't yet finished with college and is not working full time. Despite whatever they are earning from the show now, I don't think the money would last more than 3 -5 years. Especially if they start having kids immediately.

 

OH NOES!!  Does this mean.....gulp and brace yourself Effie......one or both of them might have to go to work?!!!!???  LOL

Edited by Foghorn Leghorn
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By the time Jessa's wedding is shown she will probably be ready to deliver

Lulz, I know right? As far as TLC and this big "sneak peek" of Jessa in her wedding dress, sorry to burst their bubble, but we've already seen ten thousand pictures of Jessa in her wedding dress, it's hardly a must-see tv moment. This show has really jumped the shark since Sean stopped producing.

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I'm not interested in a few clips from Jessa's wedding being shoved into yet another Amy special. They should have been showing Jessa's wedding and prep all along these last few weeks, ending with the actual stupid wedding this coming Tuesday and call it a day....until next season, with probably ALL THREE girls "expecting"...yippee!!

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Yes, I'm not interested in Amy at all. To the point where I don't care if she makes appearances on the show, is a bridesmaid or not, whatever. Everyone talks about Josh not having a real job, but as someone in DC, I can look at what he does and sure, he broke in using his parents' name but so did half of DC, so I don't hold that against him. But I don't want to see him doing that job. I don't want to see Amy even less.

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