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Meri Brown and her Wet Bar of Tears


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" Its possible fans could see her walk away entirely. Perhaps, a spinoff series could work."  (Talking about Meri Brown).

 

I can't imagine ANYTHING more boring to watch except maybe a golf game on TV.  Or a bowling tournament.

Edited by Kyanight
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18 minutes ago, Kyanight said:

" Its possible fans could see her walk away entirely. Perhaps, a spinoff series could work."  (Talking about Meri Brown).

 

I can't imagine ANYTHING more boring to watch except maybe a golf game on TV.  Or a bowling tournament.

It may provide some snarkworthy material to see Meri step bravely into the dating scene, all dolled up in her LLR finery and artful cosmetics, only to find to her shock and dismay that she is not able to attract a handsome multi-millionaire with private planes and homes scattered all over the globe.  She may find herself Looking For Mr. Goodenough instead.

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3 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

It may provide some snarkworthy material to see Meri step bravely into the dating scene, all dolled up in her LLR finery and artful cosmetics, only to find to her shock and dismay that she is not able to attract a handsome multi-millionaire with private planes and homes scattered all over the globe.  She may find herself Looking For Mr. Goodenough instead.

  I see her finding an online romance with a man in Siberia who says he is a millionaire.  TLC flies her out to meet him (before the 90 days) and Meri is dismayed to find out he's a woman.  But at least he has a "Boris accent" - so there's that!

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Brava, @Kohola3!  I'd love to read your recap of the next episode Sunday, except I know you don't watch.  

2 hours ago, Kyanight said:

" Its possible fans could see her walk away entirely. Perhaps, a spinoff series could work."  (Talking about Meri Brown).

 

I can't imagine ANYTHING more boring to watch except maybe a golf game on TV.  Or a bowling tournament.

George Carlin:  "Ever watch golf?  It's like watching flies fuck."  I'm with George!  My mother was a bowler, and I remember seeing Saturday afternoon bowling on TV, on black & white TV.  Completely boring, and I found other stuff to do pronto!  

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9 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

Episode 1:  Meri, on the couch alone, makes the dramatic announcement that she is leaving.  She looks hopefully toward the door waiting for a histrionic outburst. But Kootie is currently torturing Truely, Janelle is at the drive thru, Sobyn is still asleep, and Christine is taking one of her arsenal of antidepressants and listening to the angels singingk.  We watch Meri alternately crying and making her bitch face for the entire episode as she waits for the crowd to assemble.  It never does.

Episode 2:  Meri searches for a mansion……..someplace.  We watch her traipsing through multiple dwellings and listen to her complain about everything from wet bars to French doors to elevators to number of rooms which makes the Realtor finally punch her.  We never learn what she picks out because, by then, we really don’t care.  But kudos to the Realtor.

Episode 3:  Meri loads a U-Haul all by herself because no one will help.  She has to get the large box truck to accommodate the 20,000 unsold polyester nightmare garments and her stash of empty corn cans. Periodically she stops to either wipe away a tear because she’s not feeling safe anymore or bitch about the fact that no one came to pitch in.

Episode 4: Meri arrives at her new digs and looks hopefully into the distance for her loving family to arrive and help unload and/or beg her to come back, neither of which happens.  She alternates between gazing into the distance and checking for eye boogers.  We can’t take it anymore and turn on an old movie.

Episode 5:  Somehow Meri got unpacked and settled in…or not, who cares.  Now she’s in Parowan where she gives a room by room tour of the B&B pointing out the unique accoutrements like black towels, closets, and toilets.  The highlight of the episode is watching her pour dried up peanuts into a dusty bowl and festively arrange it on a doily covered table.  And on to……..

Episode 6:  Meri gleefully clomps aboard a tramp steamer for yet another rocking LLCrap cruise.  She targets any male young enough to be her son and surreptitiously snaps selfies of them together when he’s not looking.  She posts these with tantalizing little hashtags like #greatbuns, #mybad, #cougarmeat. There are also pictures of her madcap antics onboard.   Or manic, take your pick.

Episode 7:  Meri visits the Snowflake in Chicago.  They spend the entire episode glaring at each other.  This is a dialog free episode, don’t bother to adjust the sound.

Episode 8:  I got nuthin’.

This is why there will never, ever be a spinoff.

LOL, this site is a major reason I will be able to get through the madness that is life now!! Thank  you all for the entertainment and snark and laughs! God bless all of you!

 

Edited by Gramto6
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11 hours ago, Kyanight said:

  I see her finding an online romance with a man in Siberia who says he is a millionaire.  TLC flies her out to meet him (before the 90 days) and Meri is dismayed to find out he's a woman.  But at least he has a "Boris accent" - so there's that!

New 90 Day Fiancé episode!  I’m in!!

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21 hours ago, Kohola3 said:

She has to get the large box truck to accommodate the 20,000 unsold polyester nightmare garments and her stash of empty corn cans

Empty corn cans! Love your eye for detail. The whole post was wonderful! So funny.

And omg if Meri left, 90 Day Fiasco would be a *great* crossover!

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14 minutes ago, Sandy W said:

"hoodie I'm wearing today in honor and sweet remembrance of what almost was"  Very surprised the hoodie depicts an anchor and not a hovering helicopter.

I was looking for a picture of "Sam Cooper" on the front of her sweatshirt.  You know... a nice half-face stolen pic from the internet somewhere....   image.png.9fe7bf1dd57052d9e3436c65e83fc316.png

Edited by Kyanight
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On 3/21/2020 at 11:45 PM, crimson23 said:

I thought Meri didn't want to be in da trees. 

Meri wanted the opportunity to be in the trees. Then she wanted the chance to change her mind about said trees, as many times as her little heart desired.

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On 3/20/2020 at 11:22 AM, Sandy W said:

It may provide some snarkworthy material to see Meri step bravely into the dating scene, all dolled up in her LLR finery and artful cosmetics, only to find to her shock and dismay that she is not able to attract a handsome multi-millionaire with private planes and homes scattered all over the globe.  She may find herself Looking For Mr. Goodenough instead.

Maybe a crossover with the reality show about dating millionaires. Opps, she'd have to pretend to have money....wait, she already does. hmmm.

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46 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

Dang, that place is ginormous!  For one person? Absolutely ridiculous.

Noooo shit! I knew it was big but I didn't know HOW big! One bedroom for Meri and four bedrooms for her ego. One bathroom for Meri and four bathrooms for her ego. She is a giant tool. She needs to fall, hard. She is hands down the Brown I loathe the most, and that's saying something!

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52 minutes ago, Kohola3 said:

Dang, that place is ginormous!  For one person? Absolutely ridiculous.

Kody and Meri must have lost their minds for even wanting to rent this gigantic home, just for Meri?  I know the Brown's are stupid, but really????  How stupid are they????

5 minutes ago, suomi said:

Noooo shit! I knew it was big but I didn't know HOW big! One bedroom for Meri and four bedrooms for her ego. One bathroom for Meri and four bathrooms for her ego. She is a giant tool. She needs to fall, hard. She is hands down the Brown I loathe the most, and that's saying something!

I couldn't have written it any better myself.  I am right there with you.  Meri is a piece of work, and karma will follow her and it will be named Robyn.

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38 minutes ago, suomi said:

Noooo shit! I knew it was big but I didn't know HOW big! One bedroom for Meri and four bedrooms for her ego. One bathroom for Meri and four bathrooms for her ego. She is a giant tool. She needs to fall, hard. She is hands down the Brown I loathe the most, and that's saying something!

She has truck loads of Lularoe inventory.  That's what she puts in those bedrooms.

34 minutes ago, texasbluebonnets said:

I couldn't have written it any better myself.  I am right there with you.  Meri is a piece of work, and karma will follow her and it will be named Robyn.

I disagree with both of you.  Robyn is horrendous.

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20 hours ago, texasbluebonnets said:

Kody and Meri must have lost their minds for even wanting to rent this gigantic home, just for Meri?  I know the Brown's are stupid, but really????  How stupid are they????

That house is freaking insane!  5 bedrooms, 5 bathrooms, a three-stall garage?  Doing some rudimentary math here, it seems that  - given the dire financial situation of these dunderheads - that mansion could have easily housed Meri, Kody, Robyn and her kids, as well as Janelle and her kids.  That's 11 people.  Plenty of room if Robyn's special snowflake children don't require their own personal bedroom and bathroom.  It is literally impossible to feel sorry for any of these morons.  I'm positive that Meri rented this monstrosity in order to try and one-up Robyn's gigantic home, nothing more.

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I thought that 5 bed/5 bath home was Meri's former rental--with the stream in the house...but she was forced to move out of there. Anyone know where her current home is and what it's like? I'm sure it's not small and modest, but is it as fancy as that other rental had been?

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2 minutes ago, kimaken said:

I thought that 5 bed/5 bath home was Meri's former rental--with the stream in the house...but she was forced to move out of there. Anyone know where her current home is and what it's like? I'm sure it's not small and modest, but is it as fancy as that other rental had been?

It has 4 bedrooms 3.5 baths and is 4,000 square feet. The lot is 3.56 acres. Of course this is if I have the correct house.

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Am I the only one who thinks it's lunacy to advertise the fact that Meri rents huge houses and then lives there alone?  It takes about two seconds to do a search on the internet and find out the exact location of the house, and then anyone could show up for any reason.  

My house isn't even half that size and I don't live alone.  However, on the rare occasions that I've been here overnight by myself, I'm a bit paranoid and hear noises in every part of the house.  I would think that for safety reasons if nothing else, Meri would be better off in a condo with security restrictions.

 

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17 minutes ago, MonicaM said:

It takes about two seconds to do a search on the internet and find out the exact location of the house, and then anyone could show up for any reason.  

Oh, I think BItchface is perfectly safe. Who would want 50,000 unsold polyester rags?  And, much like the Ransom of Red Chief, anyone who kidnapped her would be paying the Browns to take her back.

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23 hours ago, Kyanight said:

She has truck loads of Lularoe inventory.  That's what she puts in those bedrooms.

I disagree with both of you.  Robyn is horrendous.

Oh don't get me wrong.  Meri and Robyn are actually tied for the crown of Kody.  I can't stand either one anymore.  If my memory serves me correctly wasn't there 2 more wives in this family?  Christine and Janelle if I remember their names right.  

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6 hours ago, MonicaM said:

Am I the only one who thinks it's lunacy to advertise the fact that Meri rents huge houses and then lives there alone?  It takes about two seconds to do a search on the internet and find out the exact location of the house, and then anyone could show up for any reason.  

My house isn't even half that size and I don't live alone.  However, on the rare occasions that I've been here overnight by myself, I'm a bit paranoid and hear noises in every part of the house.  I would think that for safety reasons if nothing else, Meri would be better off in a condo with security restrictions.

 

Totally agree with you, @MonicaM ... I get irrationally scared sometimes when I’m alone or stressing out (let’s be real, when I’m having a panic attack lol) and it’s just me in the house.

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7 hours ago, MonicaM said:

Am I the only one who thinks it's lunacy to advertise the fact that Meri rents huge houses and then lives there alone?  It takes about two seconds to do a search on the internet and find out the exact location of the house, and then anyone could show up for any reason.  

My house isn't even half that size and I don't live alone.  However, on the rare occasions that I've been here overnight by myself, I'm a bit paranoid and hear noises in every part of the house.  I would think that for safety reasons if nothing else, Meri would be better off in a condo with security restrictions.

 

That's so selfish, MonicaM! If Meri lived in some dinky condo, she'd have no place to store her mountains of LuLaRags, and where would her hypothetical eleventy-billion spirit children sleep?!

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8 minutes ago, CocoPuffs said:

Curious. Danny Gokey is a pretty well known Christian artist. Does he ever respond to her? I know she used to always tag him, but I don’t really look at her social media anymore. 
 

Meri appears to be a "clout chaser".  There was the tagging of Danny Gokey, Steele from VanLadyLove and her BFF, Eliza Furr, the Celine Dion impersonator.

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People impersonate Celine Dion?   Jeez. 🤔

Hey, the house in the photos has a bed in the bedroom!!  Wonder if Meri ever got help setting hers up...

Edited by Meowwww
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26 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

Meri posted this. Someone asked who it was. Someone else guessed Christine. Meri’s  answer, “nope”.

 

Ysabel?  It looks like the siding on Christine's house and she did have a hot tub on her LV patio.  Maybe she hauled it to Flagstaff, I didn't notice the tub in real estate photos of her house in Las Vegas.

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Yep definitely Mariah. I’d know that rat-nest hairdo anywhere. Wonder if Auj is there too? I’m just going to call it, these two aren’t ready for marriage if they can’t bunker down together in a pandemic without running home to their banks. 

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8 minutes ago, Sofa Sloth said:

Yep definitely Mariah. I’d know that rat-nest hairdo anywhere. Wonder if Auj is there too? I’m just going to call it, these two aren’t ready for marriage if they can’t bunker down together in a pandemic without running home to their banks. 

It's Mariah alright.  I checked the book, it's Exclusion and Embrace by Miroslav Volf.  Paperback $59.26.

Quote from a review: "otherness, the simple fact of being different in some way, has come to be defined as in and of itself evil"

Sounds woke enough for Mariah to want to read.

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On 3/20/2020 at 10:25 AM, Kyanight said:

What does she expect people to say?  "I celebrated by eating a carton of mint chocolate chip ice cream, belching, scratching and watching Sister Wives on TLC...."

That's probably how Kody spent St. Pat's Day.

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Did she get on another plane to spread germs further west or drive?

Are those red on the left and green on the right hand stick-on nails?  The opposite of naval conventions because she is special.

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2 hours ago, Sandy W said:

It's Mariah alright.  I checked the book, it's Exclusion and Embrace by Miroslav Volf.  Paperback $59.26.

Quote from a review: "otherness, the simple fact of being different in some way, has come to be defined as in and of itself evil"

Sounds woke enough for Mariah to want to read.

Only the woke one would read her $60 book in the spa 🙄

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4 hours ago, deirdra said:

Did she get on another plane to spread germs further west or drive?

 

I would think she and Audrey would drive, since they have the dogs.  Unless Audrey's job is considered essential and she stayed in Chicago while Mariah flew off to Flagstaff.  I don't remember what Audrey does for a job?

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41 minutes ago, smarty2020 said:

I would think she and Audrey would drive, since they have the dogs.  Unless Audrey's job is considered essential and she stayed in Chicago while Mariah flew off to Flagstaff.  I don't remember what Audrey does for a job?

Sells Lulahellno and is a graphic designer. The very definition of non essential I’d say.  I’d be surprised if Audrey went with her in saying that, I would have expected at least three close-up fake smiling selfies by now, if she had accompanied  snowflake in running home to be taken care of by mommy. 

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