S05.E14: Whole New Ballgame

[OnceSane]

Quote

Baseball legend Johnny Damon returns to charter in Ibiza, putting pressure on Tom to rectify the Damons’ poor experience with the food they were served last season. With Aesha onboard, Bugsy ups her expectations for the interior team. Meanwhile, Rob’s personal life begins to interfere with his work, and Jess notices some red flags with his behavior.

Airs August 31, 2020.

[Kayz Opinion]

On 8/29/2020 at 11:20 AM, OnceSane said:

Jess notices some red flags with his behavior.

Did I mention what I noticed?  I can't remember.   Jess has a LOT of stretch marks on that big beautiful butt.

[chenoa333]

4 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

Did I mention what I noticed?  I can't remember.   Jess has a LOT of stretch marks on that big beautiful butt.

Maybe that big butt is filled with butt implant stuff? I don't know what they put in there butt maybe it's bad silicone implants or injections?

Jess has nice hair though.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[FlyingEgret]

Was Cap really leaning out the window of the bridge taking pictures/selfies while sailing to Ibiza?  I know it's a little thing, but what happened to staying alert and focused at all times while on the bridge???

[TexasGal]

Did Tom ask Aesha whether baseball was played on a field or a pitch, and she answered incorrectly?  I mean, ask a friggin American maybe?

Oh god, Aesha.  It’s soooooooo cooooooooool.  I have not missed that.

[pieinmyeye]

Liked the way instead of asking Rob if they could help, Sandbag and Ms. Thinks She Knows It All acted perturbed that he wasn’t all sunshine and roses. A holes.

[PaperTree]

Ibiza looks entirely too crowded for me, especially now.

Never had my face painted and never will.

[Pop Tart]

I remember a time when Hannah tried to give you a heads up Jess that Rob’s “ex” might not be so ex after all. His response was far too emotional to be just a random text from an “ex”. 

[howiveaddict]

On the baseball tablescape, the table runner, or mat looked like something from a kid's birthday party.  Sandy still hovering over guests while they are eating.  Wish she had been the one to drop the stupid bowl being used as a food cover.  

Wouldn't it be funny if Tom liked Aesha better and threw Malia over for her.  

So, if you are in a bad head space, you need to lie to your captain about it.  Just don't take any prescribed valium. And it's ok for Aesha to be drinking at that party, on the job.  Heard Sandy say it herself.

[njbchlover]

Gee....looks like Malia is now not only a bosun, but she's also a medical professional, attending to that guest's cut on her finger/hand.

I wonder if Malia got busy filling out all those incident reports - one for the drunk, falling down guest and another for Jess' heart palpitations.  Wonder if she developed writers' cramp filling out all those forms!!  

Also, if they now have a full interior crew with Aesha, why is Malia still hovering around the galley?  She really is, literally, following in her mentor, Sandy's, footsteps.  Tom seems to be heavily relying on Malia to act as a sous chef - we see him giving her direction on how to plate his food - why isn't one of the stews doing that?  

Why didn't Tom think to ask his girlfriend, who is an American, about baseball rather than Aesha?  And, why didn't Bugsy also ask the American crew members about baseball?  One of them would have been able to answer their questions regarding where a baseball game is played, and that, NO--no one uses a whistle in a baseball game - they are called umpires - NOT referees!!!  

Also, I get that they are supposedly "behind" on the laundry, but why wouldn't Bugsy have Jess assist with dinner service when all three stews are on duty?   (I quoted "behind" here because I'm pretty convinced that most of the ship's laundry gets sent out to a land-based laundry service - no way those tiny machines could constantly handle all of the king/queen sized sheets and bedding, plus all of those big, plush towels-they are just not large enough.  Those towels alone would take hours and hours to dry in those small dryers, and probably only one or two towels would fit at a time.) 

It seems pretty ridiculous to have the bosun and one of the deck crew assisting with dinner when they could have three stews and one member of the deck crew. 

Anyway, Malia was one busy little bee this episode - doing her bosun thing, guiding Sandy into and right back out of that tiny docking space*, being a nurse, being on jellyfish watch, writing up incident reports, being a sous chef - where does she find the time to still kiss up to Sandy?? 

*And - on the topic of that tiny docking space - why was that even necessary?  It seems like they were literally in that spot for about 30 minutes!!   Presumably, it was all to showcase Sandy's fabulous docking skills and Malia's wonderful way of guiding her captain into the space.  I'm guessing the guests had to board from the stern of the boat?  

Why did Sandy have to take the ride to shore with the guests when they went to that party~~Did anyone else think that she was going to go and party with Johnny Damon and his friends?  I don't think we've ever seen any other captain do that.  We've seen Lee drive the smaller boats a few times, but never just hop in to take the ride.

Lastly - I'm disappointed that Rob may be turning out to be another jerky guy.  What makes him more of a jerk is that he is using the guise of being a "sensitive soul".  He really is becoming kind of creepy.  

Edited September 1, 2020 by njbchlover

[sara1025]

It's like Sandy is trying to start trouble. Johnny the charter guest IMO didn't even sound upset about the food being warm, not hot. What does Sandy do? Goes storming into the galley ranting about how "IT'S NOT HOT!!!! WHAT CAN WE DO DO MAKE IT HOT!!!!!!!!" I mean, personally I don't exactly feel bad for Tom but Sandy is just so over the top. It's like she loves when there's a hint of there being a problem so she can throw a fit about it and make a huge deal. As a guest, I would be stressed out with her hovering over me eating dinner, constantly asking how it is looking all worried. Captain Lee was so much more chill, and only got involved when there were ACTUAL problems (Kevin's mishaps, for example).

Edited September 1, 2020 by sara1025

[Marley]

I’m so over the boat parking scenes. It’s always the same thing every time who cares. I’ve seen it happen a million times in the show lol. We had to see it twice in like 2 seconds.

I’ve always thought Rob was a douche who hides it by saying he’s a sensitive soul. They obv wont last.

I do not care about Bugsy and Alex.

The tables are always too cluttered for my taste.

Aesha is annoying.

I would not want the Captain just hanging around while I’m trying to eat and have fun with my friends.

Edited September 2, 2020 by Marley

[Kayz Opinion]

1 hour ago, sara1025 said:

I mean, personally I don't exactly feel bad for Tom but Sandy is just so over the top. It's like she loves when there's a hint of there being a problem so she can throw a fit about it and make a huge deal.

I think she's jealous that all the young'uns are getting SO MUCH TV TIME.  Some producer told her how to get it for herself.

[Kayz Opinion]

2 hours ago, njbchlover said:

Anyway, Malia was one busy little bee this episode - doing her bosun thing, guiding Sandy into and right back out of that tiny docking space*, being a nurse, being on jellyfish watch, writing up incident reports, being a sous chef - where does she find the time to still kiss up to Sandy?? 

Boyfriend Tom had better run like hell!

[endure]

It sounded like Sandy thinks she’s the Queen 👑  when she was so amazed by Robs little hissy fit In front of her.

[endure]

Shouldn’t Sandy be concerned about how drunk her guests are on her watch, drownings happen all the time.

Why should the chef feel like he has to pretend he knows about baseball?

[Jack Sampson]

2 hours ago, sara1025 said:

As a guest, I would be stressed out with her hovering over me eating dinner, constantly asking how it is looking all worried.

The move is to start ordering her around.  Sandy (NOT captain), as long you're hovering there, be a doll and get me <object>.  Sandy, honey run down and get my wife's sweater, she's a little cold.  She'd get the message eventually.

[jumper sage]

10 hours ago, howiveaddict said:

Wouldn't it be funny if Tom liked Aesha better and threw Malia over for her.  

Yes!  I have a feeling that Malia, who is all about the jump-up, will throw Tom over for a captain.

[Jsage]

10 hours ago, njbchlover said:

I wonder if Malia got busy filling out all those incident reports - one for the drunk, falling down guest and another for Jess' heart palpitations.  Wonder if she developed writers' cramp filling out all those forms!!  

Hmm, I wonder if Jess's palpitations are anxiety over what's going on with Rob. I guess Sandy will have to fire her so she isn't a danger to the guests and other crew members.

[Mr. Miner]

I hope Jess can hold it together and not do something stupid like shut her head in a door.

[spunky]

I want Johnny Damon's wife to stor up trouble again this charter like she did last season.  Just so she can get under Malia's skin.

[psychoticstate]

I still hate Malia.  Sandy still annoys the ever loving crap out of me.

Sounds like Jess's heart palpitations are anxiety-related.   Rob did the right thing by telling her about his ex texting but she was well within her rights not to like it or feel comfortable about it.  As one of the obvious downsides to a boatmance, everyone knows your business so it's not like this stays between Rob and Jess.  

Why doesn't every luxury yacht have those plate covers?  It's such a stupidly simple suggestion, especially since on some of these boats, the galley isn't close to the dining area.  But then, I guess, we wouldn't have the drama  of Sandy hovering and freaking out about how Johnny Damon's food isn't HOT!  

I did have to laugh over Jess being annoyed over Aesha's delight over absofuckinglutely EVERYTHING.  She's not wrong.  

Alex continues to remain cute.

The drunk charter guest was an embarrassment.  Girl, they've not even gotten out of port properly and you're already falling down drunk?  

Since Malia is, like, the best bosun to ever bosun, why did she allow the guests to go into jellyfish-infested waters?  I think that happened a season or two ago and Joao wouldn't let the guests in.  Couldn't Sandy, with her mad captain skillz, move the boat?  

Mrs. Johnny Damon seems like a high maintenance pain in the ass.  

[Lassus]

12 hours ago, njbchlover said:

Gee....looks like Malia is now not only a bosun, but she's also a medical professional, attending to that guest's cut on her finger/hand.

This board is hate-obsessed with Malia. 

 

Unlike the rest of my office, I am first-aid, blood-borne pathogen, and CPR-certified.  Hence, although I am not a medical professional, I'm the one who deals with such things.   It would be my guess that she is also.  Lordy.

Edited September 1, 2020 by Lassus

[njbchlover]

1 hour ago, Lassus said:

This board is hate-obsessed with Malia. 

 

Unlike the rest of my office, I am first-aid, blood-borne pathogen, and CPR-certified.  Hence, although I am not a medical professional, I'm the one who deals with such things.   It would be my guess that she is also.  Lordy.

First, thank you for your first aid service.  My son is an EMT, and I greatly appreciate anyone who is in that field - it's not easy, whether it's a career choice or volunteer service.

I'm not hate-obsessed with Malia, I just really, really don't like her and the way she acts towards and treats others.  For the record, I didn't like her in her previous season when she was a just a deckhand, either.  Her actions toward Hannah (whom I also was not crazy about) this season were beneath contempt, imo.

And, I am sure that the bosun of any ship must or should have some sort of first aid certifications.  I think in previous episodes of Below Deck, I recall Eddie administering some first aid, as well.  With Malia, however, it's just that it's like she's all over the place, so that's the reason for my snarking on her.  She's a bosun, she's a sous chef, she's a stew, she's a cabin manager, she's a first aid provider - she's just EVERYTHING!!!!  (sarcasm here...)  Everytime I see Malia, I keep waiting to hear background music of some heroic proportions ("Here she comes to save the day....."  LOL!)

And, if she does have any type of first aid training and/or certifications, the first thing Malia should have done was put on some type of gloves to tend to the guest - especially with blood involved!!  (Is there some kind of maritime law about this?)

Edited September 1, 2020 by njbchlover

[Carolina Girl]

29 minutes ago, njbchlover said:

she's just EVERYTHING!!!! 

You left out "expert on Maritime Law."

[RoseAllDay]

2 hours ago, Lassus said:

This board is hate-obsessed with Malia. 

 

Unlike the rest of my office, I am first-aid, blood-borne pathogen, and CPR-certified.  Hence, although I am not a medical professional, I'm the one who deals with such things.   It would be my guess that she is also.  Lordy.

Well, she’s kind of made her own bed this season. Queen Malia’s use of Hannah’s mental health condition to get back at her for not jumping to do Malia’s bidding, costing Hannah her job, isn’t exactly the way to go about growing a fanbase. 

Just saying.

[RoxiP]

Anybody else think Johnny Damon's hair looked really stupid?

[Jack Sampson]

Jess's heart palpitations - did she get into Malia's cocaine stash?

[Kayz Opinion]

2 hours ago, njbchlover said:

With Malia, however, it's just that it's like she's all over the place, so that's the reason for my snarking on her. 

There IS editing.  It's possible that the producers or crew (TV crew) love her.

[dangwoodchucks]

4 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

Mrs. Johnny Damon seems like a high maintenance pain in the ass.  

She’s as obnoxious as she was last time and her voice annoys me more than Aesha’s. I wonder if she’s angling for a Howives position, or their own show.

The red glass marbles/sprinkles on the baseball-themed tablescape looked like blood spatter.
 

Anybody else notice the mushroom cloud in this shot about halfway through the episode?

Edited September 1, 2020 by dangwoodchucks

[lcarolynl]

18 hours ago, Lassus said:

This board is hate-obsessed with Malia. 

To be fair, she's earned it.

I used to like her. Now I hate her and it's all because of her own actions and words. 

Edited September 2, 2020 by lcarolynl
added the word "of"

[SevenCostanza]

I burst out laughing at Sandy bounding up the stairs during dinner to see if the food was hot.  I think the idea of covering the food is a good one but would have worked better if the top hadn't been bigger than the plate.    

Tom sure complains a lot and he's only been on the boat a couple of days.  I don't remember Kiko bitching like that even when he had good reason to. 

 

[Lassus]

Sandy's begging Johnny Damon for complaints was definitely to me rather her low point of the season.  (Displacing her bathroom "J'accuse!")  Not that there aren't many to choose from.  (I mean, I DON'T think Kiko was a good fit for the boat or the job, so his firing was not what I considered that massive a sin, even if she also rather screwed that up anyhow.)

[RalyWilmy]

Malia, stop fixing your hair around all of that food.  Yuck.

[Emmeline]

5 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

Mrs. Johnny Damon seems like a high maintenance pain in the ass.  

Yes she does.  Other than the fact that Damon is worth a lot of money, I can’t imagine who would marry this guy.  In his book he writes about having sex with 9 hospital employees while his first wife is in the process of giving birth.  

[Shannah Banana]

If Rob is still emotionally entangled with his ex, he really shouldn't be getting into another relationship with Jess (or anybody) so fast that you've already said 'I love you."  This is a major red flag and I hope Jess doesn't get her little heart broken.  Those things never seem to turn out too well.

The only thing I will give Malia is she is good at her job.  She is also good at being a two headed snake, not afraid to do what she has to do to get her way. 

I find it odd they don't keep cloche's on board for the people that like their food to arrive hot.  I do too, bring me my food hot.  Chef Ben finally got some one season after getting complaints about the food not being hot enough, and they worked like a charm.  Seems like they would go ahead and use them for everybody?

Edited September 1, 2020 by Shannah Banana

[biakbiak]

9 minutes ago, Emmeline said:

Yes she does.  Other than the fact that Damon is worth a lot of money, I can’t imagine who would marry this guy.  In his book he writes about having sex with 9 hospital employees while his first wife is in the process of giving birth.  

Johnny is a douche who cheated on his wife, used steroids and wrote that she didn’t fit into his new lifestyle because she was a small town girl but the “9 hospital employees” thing isn’t true. When various parts of his book were leaked and published in the Boston Herald a satirical website wrote other “revelations” that were meant to be jokes but a bunch of people didn’t realize it was satire and reposted them without attribution and since no one read his stupid book the rumor has persisted.

[Emmeline]

30 minutes ago, biakbiak said:

Johnny is a douche who cheated on his wife, used steroids and wrote that she didn’t fit into his new lifestyle because she was a small town girl but the “9 hospital employees” thing isn’t true. When various parts of his book were leaked and published in the Boston Herald a satirical website wrote other “revelations” that were meant to be jokes but a bunch of people didn’t realize it was satire and reposted them without attribution and since no one read his stupid book the rumor has persisted.

Thanks, I stand corrected.  I found it a little hard to believe that 9 women would be ready to take him into the bathroom or whatever during a shift.  I don’t care who the heck it is.

[Jobiska]

When Malia knocked on the window at Tom, I thought the window looked quite dirty.  Who's responsible for cleaning the inside of the windows?  Or maybe it was a trick of the light.

Jess' tablescape for breakfast, which was understated and sort of "natural" looking, was much more attractive to me than others I've seen on the show.

Tutus?  Whatever.  

[endure]

7 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

I still hate Malia.  Sandy still annoys the ever loving crap out of me.

Sounds like Jess's heart palpitations are anxiety-related.   Rob did the right thing by telling her about his ex texting but she was well within her rights not to like it or feel comfortable about it.  As one of the obvious downsides to a boatmance, everyone knows your business so it's not like this stays between Rob and Jess.  

Why doesn't every luxury yacht have those plate covers?  It's such a stupidly simple suggestion, especially since on some of these boats, the galley isn't close to the dining area.  But then, I guess, we wouldn't have the drama  of Sandy hovering and freaking out about how Johnny Damon's food isn't HOT!  

I did have to laugh over Jess being annoyed over Aesha's delight over absofuckinglutely EVERYTHING.  She's not wrong.  

Alex continues to remain cute.

The drunk charter guest was an embarrassment.  Girl, they've not even gotten out of port properly and you're already falling down drunk?  

Since Malia is, like, the best bosun to ever bosun, why did she allow the guests to go into jellyfish-infested waters?  I think that happened a season or two ago and Joao wouldn't let the guests in.  Couldn't Sandy, with her mad captain skillz, move the boat?  

Mrs. Johnny Damon seems like a high maintenance pain in the ass.  

I think the biggest reason not to have boat romance is that you have to see each other all the time so there’s no escape if things go wrong.

is it just me that thinks Aesha and Bugsy are a lot alike?

Edited September 1, 2020 by endure

[endure]

6 hours ago, Lassus said:

This board is hate-obsessed with Malia. 

 

Unlike the rest of my office, I am first-aid, blood-borne pathogen, and CPR-certified.  Hence, although I am not a medical professional, I'm the one who deals with such things.   It would be my guess that she is also.  Lordy.

I don’t care how qualified, educated, certified etc anyone is, if they have a huge inflated ego like Malia or Sandy I’m not going to like them.

[endure]

30 minutes ago, Jobiska said:

When Malia knocked on the window at Tom, I thought the window looked quite dirty.  Who's responsible for cleaning the inside of the windows?  Or maybe it was a trick of the light.

Jess' tablescape for breakfast, which was understated and sort of "natural" looking, was much more attractive to me than others I've seen on the show.

Tutus?  Whatever.  

I know ~ a lot of the tablescapes are just dollar store horrific.  Fine dining is usually pretty classic, plain and simple decor.

[WahooLAH99]

17 hours ago, endure said:

Shouldn’t Sandy be concerned about how drunk her guests are on her watch, drownings happen all the time.

Why should the chef feel like he has to pretend he knows about baseball?

Why is ok for Tom to Google baseball, but not Kiko to look up Vegas!

[PaperTree]

7 hours ago, njbchlover said:

First, thank you for your first aid service.  My son is an EMT, and I greatly appreciate anyone who is in that field - it's not easy, whether it's a career choice or volunteer service.

I'm not hate-obsessed with Malia, I just really, really don't like her and the way she acts towards and treats others.  For the record, I didn't like her in her previous season when she was a just a deckhand, either.  Her actions toward Hannah (whom I also was not crazy about) this season were beneath contempt, imo.

And, I am sure that the bosun of any ship must or should have some sort of first aid certifications.  I think in previous episodes of Below Deck, I recall Eddie administering some first aid, as well.  With Malia, however, it's just that it's like she's all over the place, so that's the reason for my snarking on her.  She's a bosun, she's a sous chef, she's a stew, she's a cabin manager, she's a first aid provider - she's just EVERYTHING!!!!  (sarcasm here...)  Everytime I see Malia, I keep waiting to hear background music of some heroic proportions ("Here she comes to save the day....."  LOL!)

And, if she does have any type of first aid training and/or certifications, the first thing Malia should have done was put on some type of gloves to tend to the guest - especially with blood involved!!  (Is there some kind of maritime law about this?)

All of this is so good, a little "like" just wouldn't cut it.  

 

 

 

[Stuffy]

I saw Bugsy had on white gloves during service, and I think Hannah was right last year. They are not a good look. They looked like Mickey Mouse gloves. 

[Rhetorica]

Has Tom seen Malia's previous season when she slept with two guys to assure a promotion? 

[biakbiak]

9 minutes ago, Rhetorica said:

Has Tom seen Malia's previous season when she slept with two guys to assure a promotion? 

That’s not what happened. She hooked up with Adam before the season and he had literally no control over getting that job. And she didn’t sleep with Wes she just made out with him a few times. 

[njbchlover]

1 hour ago, PaperTree said:

All of this is so good, a little "like" just wouldn't cut it.  

 

 

 

I'm sooo glad that someone here got my reference!!  😂

[njbchlover]

3 hours ago, endure said:

I know ~ a lot of the tablescapes are just dollar store horrific.  Fine dining is usually pretty classic, plain and simple decor.

I don't know if Bugsy understands that "classic, plain and simple" look, as evidenced by the six hundred clips and barrettes in her hair and the over-the-top earrings she seems to favor.

Edited September 2, 2020 by njbchlover

[PaperTree]

31 minutes ago, Rhetorica said:

Has Tom seen Malia's previous season when she slept with two guys to assure a promotion? 

Lalalalalala I can't hear you!!!  Lalalalalalalalala  🙂