S04.E14: Hard Habit To Break

[magemaud]

4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

On his IMDB profile, he's listed as 5'9" . . . but if he's the one that provided that information, it's probably off by an inch or two.

men are notorious for lying about inches. 

Remember Ed claimed to be  5' 2"

Edited May 26, 2020 by magemaud

[magemaud]

3 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

What dumpy car where they driving while “planning” to get a Jaguar or a Maserati?  

Exterior shots of their [parents'] house often shows TWIN white Nissans in the driveway. Darcey couldn't get a luxury car without Stacey getting a matching one, too. 

[Tango64]

Anyone else noticing that David and Lana never speak of anything from their 7-year online relationship? No pet names, no call backs to their experiences together, no inside jokes, no reference to anything suggesting they have been in communication -- and supposedly in love -- for a very long time?

They speak through the translator as if they have just met and are strangers having awkward chitchat.

For Lana, of course, this is because she is most likely not the person(s) that has been talking with David all this time and keeping him on the hook for more money. That's probaby somebody just working in a cubicle somewhere. If he asked her about something they discussed or referenced some line of conversation that evolved over 7 years, she would have no clue.

But why doesn't David make any reference to that? He talks to her as if they have not had this very long ongoing communication. Over 7 years, wouldn't you know a little about her family, what she does for a living, her interests, any setbacks in life, etc.? Wouldn't he say "How's your aunt who broke her leg falling off the hay wagon last month? Any luck getting that water heater fixed? How's your nephew doing in school?"

[magemaud]

1 hour ago, Colfrmb said:

@Callaphera, I seem to remember the last time David was in country and he met up with a previous pretty blonde girlfriend and his reason for not liking her more was something like she wasn’t very affectionate?  How many spurned advances will it take before he lays it out on the table that she needs to give it up?

Yes, he said he had met Anya on another trip but she was "shy" and there was no chemistry, but they have remained friends. My guess is he considers any woman who doesn't respond to his smarmy advances to be "shy" when in reality she's repulsed when she meets him in person. 

[Kath94]

On 5/25/2020 at 10:54 AM, LabScientist said:

Too funny! My husband was a professional bowler when we were first married. We tried to find any evidence of David being a pro, but couldn't find anything on him. I think he was a professional in his own mind.

Maybe he made an appearance on "Bowling for Dollars?" 😄

Does anyone else remember that TV show or am I just that old?

Edited May 26, 2020 by Kath94

[Kangatush]

23 minutes ago, Tango64 said:

Anyone else noticing that David and Lana never speak of anything from their 7-year online relationship? No pet names, no call backs to their experiences together, no inside jokes, no reference to anything suggesting they have been in communication -- and supposedly in love -- for a very long time?

They speak through the translator as if they have just met and are strangers having awkward chitchat.

For Lana, of course, this is because she is most likely not the person(s) that has been talking with David all this time and keeping him on the hook for more money. That's probaby somebody just working in a cubicle somewhere. If he asked her about something they discussed or referenced some line of conversation that evolved over 7 years, she would have no clue.

But why doesn't David make any reference to that? He talks to her as if they have not had this very long ongoing communication. Over 7 years, wouldn't you know a little about her family, what she does for a living, her interests, any setbacks in life, etc.? Wouldn't he say "How's your aunt who broke her leg falling off the hay wagon last month? Any luck getting that water heater fixed? How's your nephew doing in school?"

I've noticed.  But logic doesn't apply to a super horny weirdo who wants "affection" and thinks "mmmmmmmmmmm yes" is valid communication.

[RealReality]

12 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

I've noticed.  But logic doesn't apply to a super horny weirdo who wants "affection" and thinks "mmmmmmmmmmm yes" is valid communication.

"You remember that time I said 'mmmmmm, yes' and you responded back '🍆🍆♥️♥️💓😘😘💋💅❣️🐿️💦💦👠👡👢👒?'

[magemaud]

22 minutes ago, Kath94 said:

Maybe he made an appearance on "Bowling for Dollars?" 😄

Does anyone else remember that TV show or am I just that old?

I remember it! I was thinking since David lives in Vegas he could have "bowled" in some kind of casino game, even on a slot machine? 

[humbleopinion]

 Did Lana know what David looked like when she was talking about him to her gf on the phone?

When she told her gf that he was 60 years old was Lana thinking along the lines of Richard Gere, Dennis Quaid, Pierce Brosnan or Kevin Costner and not a pot bellied slob in worn out black sneakers, pants with hems rubbing the ground.

Maybe if he had put on a suit and tie...covering his protruding belly and giving some dignity to his otherwise outdated and shoddy appearance....

Even a Mens Warehouse 3 piece suit with vest is just lipstick on a pot bellied pig...no disrespect to all pot bellied pigs posting on this forum...

[RedDelicious]

David's incessant mmmmmm-ing nauseated me. He's literally so gross and that poor girl was so uncomfortable. I was waiting for him to stuff Lana in his giant coat to abduct her.

I totally agree with you @Tango64, she's merely the girl from the photos. I also think she can read and speak English. She seemed to understand David's words regardless of the translator app. Thankfully for her she can hide behind the language barrier to some extent. I hope TLC is paying her well, I really do. 

[humbleopinion]

David's constant moaning Mmmmms(TLC sound editing of his orgasmic moans is beyond the pale)  is him trying to evoke the same from Lana since that is their love language of 7 years.

He wants her to mirror him and give him a live action moan....putting a sound track to what she repeatedly typed to him as a noncommittal response to his neediness and as a way to kill time to keep him engaged online at $9.99/minute.

🥚theory

Befitting the fetid mayo'ed ovum...it is in the Spoiler thread.

[Sir RaiderDuck OMS]

4 hours ago, Callaphera said:

Lana recognized the words "wine" and "tequila" pretty damned quick and pointed out the freshly squeezed grapefruit juice on the menu instead during their dinner. Props to her - she recognized that David was pushing the panty peeler on her and swerved to avoid. I was always #teamLana from the start but if I wasn't, that move would have swayed me over to her side anyway. 

Methinks Lana knows English waaaaaaay better than she's letting on.

 

5 hours ago, MrBuhBye said:

He would have been their romantic enforcer, beating up Jesse and Tom and every other loser that they pick.  He would have explained that just because they dress and act like cheap whores doesn’t mean they mustn’t  be treated like goddesses. Yeah, right.  What dumpy car where they driving while “planning” to get a Jaguar or a Maserati?  I always wondered who buys the sunflower bouquets lol.

It's weird that a couple of 45-year-old women think their 48-year-old brother, were he still alive, would have time to be their 24/7 wingman/enforcer/whatever and not be occupied with his own wife and kids.

As for their cars: As someone leasing his third straight Nissan Sentra*, I wouldn't describe a late model Altima as "dumpy." However, grown adults do not normally graduate straight from Nissans to Jaguars unless they win the lottery or something.

 

*No, I'm not the world's most boring guy when it comes to cars. Why do you ask?😋

[procrasstinator]

2 hours ago, Tango64 said:

Anyone else noticing that David and Lana never speak of anything from their 7-year online relationship? No pet names, no call backs to their experiences together, no inside jokes, no reference to anything suggesting they have been in communication -- and supposedly in love -- for a very long time?

They speak through the translator as if they have just met and are strangers having awkward chitchat.

For Lana, of course, this is because she is most likely not the person(s) that has been talking with David all this time and keeping him on the hook for more money. That's probaby somebody just working in a cubicle somewhere. If he asked her about something they discussed or referenced some line of conversation that evolved over 7 years, she would have no clue.

But why doesn't David make any reference to that? He talks to her as if they have not had this very long ongoing communication. Over 7 years, wouldn't you know a little about her family, what she does for a living, her interests, any setbacks in life, etc.? Wouldn't he say "How's your aunt who broke her leg falling off the hay wagon last month? Any luck getting that water heater fixed? How's your nephew doing in school?"

Either because he's so self-involved that he's never really tried to get to know her on any real level (we've never even heard David ask who won the hockey tournament) or because deep down he knows he's been talking to a computer and he doesn't dare ask any follow up questions so that he can keep holding on to his delusions.

[Kath94]

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

men are notorious for lying about inches. 

Remember Ed claimed to be  5' 2"

...and their height, too! 😄

[procrasstinator]

2 hours ago, magemaud said:

Yes, he said he had met Anya on another trip but she was "shy" and there was no chemistry, but they have remained friends. My guess is he considers any woman who doesn't respond to his smarmy advances to be "shy" when in reality she's repulsed when she meets him in person. 

Well, then there must be a lot of us shy ladies out here in the world.

[gingerella]

4 hours ago, DEL901 said:

I saw the same thing.  And that would be like in their homes... didn’t Usemanhave a handheld at his place?

The hand held sprayer is very common in predominately Muslim countries for the express purpose of ablutions. It can also be used as a bidet when TP is unavailable. Make of that what you may...

[Mrs. Hanson]

1 hour ago, Kath94 said:

Maybe he made an appearance on "Bowling for Dollars?" 😄

Does anyone else remember that TV show or am I just that old?

I remember it, lol.

 

13 minutes ago, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

As for their cars: As someone leasing his third straight Nissan Sentra*, I wouldn't describe a late model Altima as "dumpy." However, grown adults do not normally graduate straight from Nissans to Jaguars unless they win the lottery or something.

 

I will take (would have taken back in the day) a guy with a reliable, stable car over some flashy sports car.  I love cars, I am kinda a car nut, but those things, as Shania Twain once sang, don't impress me much.  I found that those guys were horrible tippers and not nice to server staff.  That was just me, btw,

[Frozendiva]

I have a Nissan Altima. It is a good, solid, reliable car.

I would expect the Silva twins to have Infiniti or Audi or Range Rovers.

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, humbleopinion said:

 Did Lana know what David looked like when she was talking about him to her gf on the phone?

When she told her gf that he was 60 years old was Lana thinking along the lines of Richard Gere, Dennis Quaid, Pierce Brosnan or Kevin Costner and not a pot bellied slob in worn out black sneakers, pants with hems rubbing the ground.

Maybe if he had put on a suit and tie...covering his protruding belly and giving some dignity to his otherwise outdated and shoddy appearance....

Even a Mens Warehouse 3 piece suit with vest is just lipstick on a pot bellied pig...no disrespect to all pot bellied pigs posting on this forum...

Oddly she said he looked better than she expected.  Who is homelier?  Ed?  Larry King?

[1011101010001]

41 minutes ago, Sir RaiderDuck OMS said:

Methinks Lana knows English waaaaaaay better than she's letting on.

 

It's weird that a couple of 45-year-old women think their 48-year-old brother, were he still alive, would have time to be their 24/7 wingman/enforcer/whatever and not be occupied with his own wife and kids.

As for their cars: As someone leasing his third straight Nissan Sentra*, I wouldn't describe a late model Altima as "dumpy." However, grown adults do not normally graduate straight from Nissans to Jaguars unless they win the lottery or something.

 

*No, I'm not the world's most boring guy when it comes to cars. Why do you ask?😋

I guess I meant dumpy compared to the airs they put on.

[humbleopinion]

3 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

Oddly she said he looked better than she expected. 

Veiled compliment?...Stop gushing Lana....

[Kid]

1 hour ago, procrasstinator said:

Well, then there must be a lot of us shy ladies out here in the world.

Especially if they come into contact with him.  🤣🤣

[Kareem]

1 hour ago, procrasstinator said:

Either because he's so self-involved that he's never really tried to get to know her on any real level (we've never even heard David ask who won the hockey tournament) or because deep down he knows he's been talking to a computer and he doesn't dare ask any follow up questions so that he can keep holding on to his delusions.

One vote for Option A.  Doubtless he ever got passed the Mmmm factor.  Doesn’t need her to speak English. Doesn’t need her to speak.  Just to show him affection...  Barf.  

[AZChristian]

9 hours ago, blubld43 said:

She will eat him for breakfast, lunch, and dinner . . . 

Which would be David's dream come true.  (BARF)

7 hours ago, magemaud said:

men are notorious for lying about inches. 

Horizontally and vertically.

7 hours ago, Tango64 said:

But why doesn't David make any reference to that? He talks to her as if they have not had this very long ongoing communication. 

He's still trying to convince himself that she's real>  He's afraid that if she can't remember any of their stimulating conversations over the past seven years, he might have to face the truth that she's never communicated with him once.

6 hours ago, magemaud said:

I remember it! I was thinking since David lives in Vegas he could have "bowled" in some kind of casino game . . . 

Skeeball!!!!!

4 hours ago, gingerella said:

The hand held sprayer is very common in predominately Muslim countries for the express purpose of ablutions. It can also be used as a bidet when TP is unavailable. Make of that what you may...

That makes sense.  I had just assumed they were using a bidet to wash their feet, but since Mommy Usman seemed so familiar with it - in spite of living in what appears not to be a fancy home - perhaps even not-fancy homes there have such an attachment to their toilets for religious ablutions.

[Auntie Anxiety]

On 5/25/2020 at 1:56 PM, AZChristian said:

I think he exaggerated his history.  "I was on a bowling professional league.

More like “I was the best bowler in the Ladies Over 60 league.”

[1011101010001]

15 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

Horizontally and vertically.

There are women who find large ones painful so the guys who are lying are missing out on some good opportunities.  

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

No offense but can Big Ed's darling mother see over the wheel to drive the car to the airport!??!??? 

[deirdra]

So if Lana said David looked better than she expected, has she never seen his photos on the "dating" website … because she was not the person(s) he was communicating with?

In his pleather coat he looked like he was Bowling for Columbine.

[Jady]

New here....several of you have referred to the "couples page".  Where is that?

Thanks!

[deirdra]

9 minutes ago, Jady said:

New here....several of you have referred to the "couples page".  Where is that?

Thanks!

https://forums.primetimer.com/forum/4389-the-couples-spoilers/

[Kareem]

1 hour ago, Jady said:

New here....several of you have referred to the "couples page".  Where is that?

Thanks!

Welcome!  

[Scratches19]

On 5/21/2020 at 8:46 PM, Kangatush said:

Lisa, you aren't 20, nobody is going to think you're knocked up.  And what have you done to blend besides throw on an ET scarf?

Hahaha. Yes! Also a bit of an emperor Palpatine look there. 

[Scratches19]

On 5/24/2020 at 5:34 AM, humbleopinion said:

The throughly brow beaten and chastised Prince Charming “surprises” her on his knees when she finishes having her smelly dookie....

The same toilet bidet where the ceremonial foot washing took place.

 

[corgster]

4 hours ago, AZChristian said:

 

That makes sense.  I had just assumed they were using a bidet to wash their feet, but since Mommy Usman seemed so familiar with it - in spite of living in what appears not to be a fancy home - perhaps even not-fancy homes there have such an attachment to their toilets for religious ablutions.

To add to this, bidets are popular with Muslims for another reason. The hand you wipe with is considered unclean. Even if you wash it. Since the majority of people are right-handed, shake with their right hands, etc., they keep that one clean. The left hand was used in the bathroom. Hence the history of cultural disgust when seeing a left-handed person eat, etc. 

A lot of that was resolved with the bidet. Look, ma, no hands. I have Muslim in-laws who immigrated here, and they all installed a hose to the toilet. However, I never considered if they washed their feet in it... then again, my religion calls for ablutions of the face and hands only lol

[mamadrama]

5 hours ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

No offense but can Big Ed's darling mother see over the wheel to drive the car to the airport!??!??? 

She may be like the rest of us under 5 footers and lower the steering wheel and sit on a pillow. I get asked a lot if I can see over the dashboard, but that's not the problem-it's the steering wheel. Also depends on the vehicle. It's why I drive a truck. 

[Zevious Zoquis]

15 hours ago, procrasstinator said:

Either because he's so self-involved that he's never really tried to get to know her on any real level (we've never even heard David ask who won the hockey tournament) or because deep down he knows he's been talking to a computer and he doesn't dare ask any follow up questions so that he can keep holding on to his delusions.

Both probably, but I think the second point is a huge factor.  He's learned over the years to keep the conversation as facile and meaningless as possible so as to limit the chances of any immersion-breaking responses.  He's obviously not interested in reality.  It's all a fantasy contained in the chuckle-head's mind.  If he was actually open to receiving real  input from outside the fantasy realm that exists in his own head he'd recognize the obvious fact that the woman he's bowling with is completely not into him.  

[Gobi]

9 hours ago, deirdra said:

So if Lana said David looked better than she expected, has she never seen his photos on the "dating" website … because she was not the person(s) he was communicating with?

In this instance, it could just be (if she's legitimate ; spoiler - she's not) that she knows that someone's online photos may have only a tenuous relation to reality. E.G., Rebecca. To his credit, from what we've seen David has not touched up his photos.

[blubld43]

1 hour ago, Zevious Zoquis said:

Both probably, but I think the second point is a huge factor.  He's learned over the years to keep the conversation as facile and meaningless as possible so as to limit the chances of any immersion-breaking responses.  He's obviously not interested in reality.  It's all a fantasy contained in the chuckle-head's mind.  If he was actually open to receiving real  input from outside the fantasy realm that exists in his own head he'd recognize the obvious fact that the woman he's bowling with is completely not into him.  

Exactly, it's why he doesn't appear to hear or see her hands off! attitude.  She's his soulmate, she's just shy!  I hope he goes home without ever having gone near her.

Maybe I'll be on the bus to hell for this, but this is exactly the kind of person I want to see fall hard.  Arrogant, misogynist, pos.

[lilysmom]

On 5/25/2020 at 11:37 PM, humbleopinion said:

David Stated that he gets all worked up hearing a Russian accent.

Kudos to Lana for her Marcel Marceau act.....

David’s motor is already running hot...if Lana utters “Moose and Squirrel” it will cause him to explode In his baggy old man underpants 

OMG!! I just spit a mouthful of coffee all over my laptop screen!!  LMAO!

[lilysmom]

On 5/26/2020 at 2:54 AM, steff13 said:

Is he really that short?

But absolutely "strapping" compared to Ed!

[Baltimore Betty]

Whenever I think of David bowling I keep thinking about the movie, "Kingpin," sort of a mix of Woody and Bill, lol.

David is dense, Lana does not even have to work hard to pretend to like him, David just cannot see her disdain she has for him, he did not see her straight arm hug she let him have, she certainly does not want to kiss him yet he wants to go for the gold...he really cannot read a room.

[AZChristian]

6 hours ago, mamadrama said:

She may be like the rest of us under 5 footers and lower the steering wheel and sit on a pillow. I get asked a lot if I can see over the dashboard, but that's not the problem-it's the steering wheel. Also depends on the vehicle. It's why I drive a truck. 

The happiest day of my driving life was when we bought a car that had electric seats so I could raise the seat as high as it would go and see SO MUCH better.  It's now part of my automatic process.  Get in car, start engine, raise seat, hook seat belt.  

[StatisticalOutlier]

On 5/25/2020 at 6:31 PM, Dobian said:

Bowling is like riding a bicycle, you never forget the basic mechanics of how to do it.  David looked like he had never bowled in his life.

He had better mechanics than someone who had never bowled in their life; Lana looked more like that. 

The first time they showed him throwing the ball looked pretty good to me, and others not so much.  I figured he's not only out of practice but older and stiffer, plus I doubt he had the giant belly back then, which is bound to throw him off when bending and crouching.  Unless he's kept up his bowling, the mechanics he learned were for a very different person.

Back when I was young, I was waterskiing after laying off for the winter, and had a terrible time getting up even though I would always pop out of the water with no problem.  I even accused the boat of not being as powerful as it had been months ago.  Turned out I'd gained about 10 pounds over the winter and it changed everything.

 

On 5/26/2020 at 6:54 AM, KateHearts said:

Move to a scene where she is either telling her toxic sister or her poor daughters: "I don't need the negativity! Time to be an independent woman! I'm fine!" - only to eventually melt into "I deserve to be treated well! I want my Prince Charming!  He's out there somewhere...." and the flood of tears commences.  To be emoting over their dead brother and how he would never allow Darcey to be mistreated was just total manipulation on the producers' part.  It really turned me off. 

I was turned off by it even before they brought dead brother into it.  Talking to her daughters about how post-Tom, she's going to live her best life, etc. etc. ad nauseam.  I'm sure she thinks she's teaching them to be strong, independent women, but all she's doing is involving them in her lame relationship drama and fallout, over and over. 

I'd love to be wrong because I hate to see anyone, even Darcey, live such an apparently miserable life, but I don't think she'll ever change.  Well, inside, anyway, of course.

[blubld43]

42 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

Whenever I think of David bowling I keep thinking about the movie, "Kingpin," sort of a mix of Woody and Bill, lol.

David is dense, Lana does not even have to work hard to pretend to like him, David just cannot see her disdain she has for him, he did not see her straight arm hug she let him have, she certainly does not want to kiss him yet he wants to go for the gold...he really cannot read a room.

That last part is what makes him dangerous, IMO.  When something happens that forces him to see the truth, he will explode.  The segment with him going to her apartment to see her "whether she likes it or not!" really showed his true feelings.

[Mrs. Hanson]

On 5/25/2020 at 2:27 PM, Neurochick said:

For me, sex isn't something that just men want, women like sex too.  There is nothing wrong with sex, it is normal.  What bugs me about men like David and Ed as well as women like Lisa, is they feel they are OWED sex, "I'm here, I'm American, you should WANT ME no matter how nasty and inappropriate I am."

I agree with this 100%.  And to think one is "owed" sex kinda puts it in the "Pretty Woman" category, no?

 

On 5/25/2020 at 2:38 PM, blubld43 said:

I don't know why David can't pay to get laid here in the U.S.; you can't tell me there are no sex workers with accents in the legal brothels right in his own state.

And find one with an accent or can fake an accent, too!  (Let's face it, with David there is going to be a LOT of faking, lol!

[sasha206]

21 hours ago, magemaud said:

men are notorious for lying about inches. 

Remember Ed claimed to be  5' 2"

This is very true!  But I just didn't notice him looking shrimpy around other people. If he were 5'5", I think he would look like a shrimp around the men folk they had him around.  

But maybe he's wearing elevator shoes!

[humbleopinion]

Producer: Next shoot is at a hotel suite where you and David will change into robes for a candlelight romantic dinner on the balcony.

Lana: Nyet.

Producer: Moonlight horse drawn carriage ride through the city?

Lana: Nyet.

Producer: Side by side couples massage?

Lana: Nyet.

Producer: Bowling?

Lana: Da

 

 

 

[1011101010001]

1 hour ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

I was turned off by it even before they brought dead brother into it.  Talking to her daughters about how post-Tom, she's going to live her best life, etc. etc. ad nauseam. 

The problem is that the Darcey/Tom story arc deserved at best two episodes (one for their meeting for coffee, one for his idiotic trip to drop off the letter that he could have mailed or emailed) but production saw fit to stretch it out agonizingly to 15 episodes.  Yolanda could have been one segment of one episode.  “Mom he’s a scammer and/or catfish.”  “Okay, thanks.”

[blubld43]

5 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

The problem is that the Darcey/Tom story arc deserved at best two episodes (one for their meeting for coffee, one for his idiotic trip to drop off the letter that he could have mailed or emailed) but production saw fit to stretch it out agonizingly to 15 episodes.  Yolanda could have been one segment of one episode.  “Mom he’s a scammer and/or catfish.”  “Okay, thanks.”

Agree completely, I was looking forward to some messy Darcy, but there was no story.

Same with Yolanda, she could have been a one-and-done, an episode of Catfish.

I don't like crowding in a bunch of minor players, this season could have been a lot tighter.

[Gobi]

11 minutes ago, blubld43 said:

Agree completely, I was looking forward to some messy Darcy, but there was no story.

Same with Yolanda, she could have been a one-and-done, an episode of Catfish.

I don't like crowding in a bunch of minor players, this season could have been a lot tighter.

Strange that tlc dragged out Yolanda's story, when the prior catfish story (the Christian stripper) was cut off early.