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Callaphera

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  1. I'm casting my vote for Akinyi and a margarita machine.
  2. Nah, Jenny's just high from sniffing the fumes from the super glue that she's going to use when the world's worst cat-fisher that cheating, lying scumbag her soulmate finally gives her a ring. She thinks she's living in a Danielle Steele novel but it's that copy that's been passed around and passed by at the secondhand store so much, it's falling apart and on sale for a quarter. That light blue looked amazing on Deavan and the lighter hair and tan looked great, too. I was a little concerned that she was going to flash some boob in the back when they first got there, though. She may be young but she definitely needed a bra that day.
  3. I'm thinking more that it was just filmed in a different order than how it's presented so Tiffany wasn't in her blue dress yet. I think she wore the red one into the studio before they started filming on set and Paul was still setting off warning alarms in the building. It's like how we saw Corey carrying in three different purple shirts on hangers and yet he chose the one that wasn't properly ironed at the shoulders and made it look like he was sweating through it even though it was just the shadow from his giant dim head.
  4. Workplace pensions aren't as common in Canada. CPP (Canadian Pension Plan) kicks in at 65. You can take it at 60 with a significant reduction (7%?) or wait until 70 to get a bonus added to it. I think maybe if she was union, she might have a workplace pension and maybe a bridging option to cover her until she turns 65? ETA: Her saying that her pension got cut makes me think that she was union and maybe took early retirement and had a bridging plan but the bridging ran out before CPP kicked in - it usually covers some or most of the difference between one pension versus both pensions (for example, my dad retired at 60 and had a kick-ass work pension + bridging, the bridging ran out when CPP kicked in at 65).
  5. The most entertaining part of the whole episode was Tiffany's magically colour changing dress. It's blue and flowered! Now it's red during the Corey and Evelin segment. Now it's blue and flowered during the Laura and Aladin segment! I can't wait to see what other colours it turns into during the other segments.
  6. I made perogies and cabbage rolls for Thanksgiving dinner tonight and Maria never showed! I knew I should have gone with the fruit roll-up bikini underwear instead.
  7. ...anyone got a daughter the marrying age I can borrow?
  8. They're too white chocolate (which isn't chocolate at all) for Benny Boy. He prefers 70% Cacao Dark Chocolate.
  9. To be fair, it's hard to look sexy when you just downed your fourth drink of the hour. What you think is a smoldering cat-eye look comes across more like you're having a stroke because your left eyelid (and right tit) is drooping something fierce. Darcey's "I'm totally hosed but I'm gonna do my best to pretend I'm sober" routine is amazing. And amazingly bad. The longer her eyes are closed when she's talking, the drunker she is.
  10. A two-bit hooker at least makes sure her boobs look even in her dress, Darcey. There was a point where she was trying to lean back against the bar all sexy-like to get Tom's attention and it looked more like her implant started leaking on the one side.
  11. "You know what? My new hot Colombian online girlfriend absolutely hates my old girlfriend. So I'm totes going to take the ring that I proposed with back from my old girlfriend and use it to propose promise to propose one day because I'm a dork and can't get it up show her that she's the one for me. And bonus: I can afford more face masks with my reduce/reuse/recycle jewelry policy. What could possibly go wrong?" - Tim's thought process, probably.
  12. My poor cat! He thought a confused chihuahua (or 90's Mariah Carey) was hidden somewhere behind our entertainment center when Daniel started hitting high notes that even castrati would be jealous of. Daaamn, kid. Enjoy it now because it ain't gonna be like that in ten years when your balls (and voice) drop.
  13. I'm amused by Darcey the parrot. Tom used the "tit for tat" phrase once after Stacey and Darcey passive aggressively threw down in Albania and now she repeats it every chance she gets. "Tit for tat." squaaaak "Tit for tat." squaaaak "Polly Darcey want a cracker diamond?"
  14. Hola, Julie! Youse guys. You're the best bunch of meatballs a girl could spend her summer snarking with. Shoutout to my mom's brother's wife's sister's uncle's house cleaner! XYZ 928! *scrawls "Have a nice summer fall, winter, and spring!" in all your yearbooks* See you all next June when we do it all over again!
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