S03.E13: Against All Odds/S03.E14: Tell All

[Drogo]

The couples must part ways, but not all couples handle the distance well; Shaun Robinson sits down with the cast for a deep dive into the details of their most intense moments from the season.

This topic will be used to discuss both halves of the Tell All. 

As a tell-all episode topic, social media spoilers are permitted under spoiler tags. 

[Kiss my mutt]

When Tim talking about how weird it was that Zied was wearing a shirt with Rebecca’s face on it, I was thinking when it comes to weird, he doesn’t have a leg to stand on, let alone three. 
 

[nytonc]

Is Darcy going to the Oscars?   

Edited October 28, 2019 by nytonc

[hookedontv]

12 minutes ago, Kiss my mutt said:

When Tim talking about how weird it was that Zied was wearing a shirt with Rebecca’s face on it, I was thinking when it comes to weird, he doesn’t have a leg to stand on, let alone three. 

Tim’s just jealous that Zied has actual shoulders to hold up a tee shirt. 

[renatae]

I am blown away that Maria is a real girl! Still a liar and a scammer, but a real beautiful girl and not a 50 year old man.

Tom scammed Darcy big time. His on again, off again passion is a giveaway. Convenient that he got all lovey dovey for the last day, broke up when she was back here, and now that there is a tell all, his face is right there. I have a place for his stupid key.

[Spike]

Both Tom and Teri have been on crash diets.

[vanillamountain]

I think my favorite part of this evening was when Angela randomly started taking things out of her bra, and the camera zoomed in on the cigarettes and lighter that she left on the table.

Also, Tom's sister was reading Darcey like a book, and I was 100% here for it: "Tom, she doesn't want to get to know you as a person. She just wants a wedding ring." Boom.

Quote

Both Tom and Teri have been on crash diets.

Honestly, Teri looked like she lost a bunch of weight and gave it to Avery.

Edited October 28, 2019 by vanillamountain

[Callaphera]

Most amusing moment goes to the closed captioning for this episode, with the [WHIMSICAL SUSPENSEFUL HIP-HOP MUSIC] during airport meet and greet segment at the reunion. That music has more motivation than Tim trying to stick it in or Hammer Time Caesar clearing the 90 million app notifications he has on his phone at all times. 

[Cammi]

Caesar is an asshole. Not sorry. 

After seeing his social media with all his “vanilla lover / white women need only apply” bullshit, and his acting profile listing himself as “mixed race”, he can fuck off with his self hating nonsense. Deserves EVERY BIT of grief that Ukrainian cold fish is dishing him.  Wtf he mixed with? Black and...... ? Black? Fucking tool.

And speaking unofficially on behalf of the Ethnic Women’s Delegation, Caucasian women- y’all can have his dumb ass. We sign off! 

Tim making fun of Rebecca’s Zied coffee mug. That mug done seen more action than Jeniffer! Lord Tim, just suck on that e-cig, and pretend it’s a penis. He’s just pissed at Jesse cuz he WISHED he looked half as good. Tim got the Jesse jellies. 

[Spike]

What is it with middle-aged Angela and Rebecca both hauling stuffed animals through airports?

Edited October 28, 2019 by Spike

[Adeejay]

9 minutes ago, Spike said:

Both Tom and Teri have been on crash diets.

I believe Teri is on a stress diet.  It breaks my heart every time I look at her and see the worry in her face.  It's a crying shame, because she seems like a good mom.

Based on the way Akinyi kept putting Ben down, surely they are not still together.  She hasn't said one kind word to or about him.  What a horrible woman!

I never took to Jeniffer.  After her behavior tonight, I am glad. 

[Callaphera]

3 minutes ago, Cammi said:

And speaking unofficially on behalf of the Ethnic Women’s Delegation, Caucasian women- y’all can have his dumb ass. We sign off! 

Speaking unofficially on behalf of the Vanilla Lovers, Ukrainian Division - do we have to? I have some coupons for eggs. Maybe we can make a deal that we're all satisfied with. 

[Honey]

I so much laughed when Darcey said her favorite color is "white or clear"  Yup, she said clear folks.  Up until now when someone asked my favorite color, I said Plaid.  Not anymore, I am stealing Darcey's favorite color of Clear.  It completely makes sense though, if she could wear clear colored clothing, she would.

[Delete]

Refrigerator Ang needs to cool it with the testosterone patches. One day her bulbous head is going to pop right off during a rage attack. I fear for MikHuL if he comes to 'Merica. She's definitely prepping for another tv appearance, and it will be for the series Snapped. 

Tim and Jesse are tied for first place in the wannabe pretty boi category in the Thirsty Fame ho Olympics. Both are extremely obnoxious, and act like they know it all. They   see women as an object, or pretty play thing, and don't know what to do with women on an emotional, or mental level. 

Tom tamed his pet hair ferret with a healthy dose of shellac, and slimmed down. Darcey got dressed in Forever 21 Dynasty Collection, and wore Barbie hair extensions down to her butt. Naturally, TLC had to have the loud sister come on and humiliate Darcey while Tom sat giving  Zoolander Blue Steel stare. There is zero chemistry between the two of them, and I've seen cadavers in a morgue look warmer than these two together. 

Zied looked like a deer caught in headlights at the reunion. Also, his hair looked so very much better. so very beautiful much like. 

Omar emotionless mask slipped off a bit when he discovered he's not coming to America. I definitely saw huge disappointment in his face. 

Akinki was cutting Hairyback Ben with her words. She was ruthless. No sweet baby voice anymore. No tears at the airport, Akinki. The claws were out.

Spoiler

She's probably found out what a major loser he is, and that he has no money, was evicted from his home, and had his car repo'd. 

Mariaaaaaaaaaa! She's a well-seasoned Ukrainian gold digga. She's been doing for 8 years now. What surprised me is that in all this time she could not find one guy with big dollars? Maybe she sticks with several small fish and bleeds them dry over time. You gotta be devoid of a soul to do that for a living. Hope she's saving that money up, because Ukrainians do not age well. (I'm half Ukrainian, so I can make fun of them.) 🙂

That said, I don't mind that she has drained Ceasar's $ well. He's the absolute worst. He's a zero in looks & personality, but he acts like he's a solid 10 or 11. When he was in the suit with the dollar tree sunglasses, and his big ole jug ears popping he looked like an absolute tool. Maria isn't wanting a life in a dingy rental eating eggs on a paper plate. 

Edited October 28, 2019 by Barbara Please

[HahYallDoin]

1 hour ago, Spike said:

Both Tom and Teri have been on crash diets.

I think Emma has dropped some weight too...her face looked thinner. 

[Spike]

11 minutes ago, HahYallDoin said:

I think Emma has dropped some weight too...her face looked thinner. 

Yeah and she softened the Raggedy Ann rouge.

[Mrs. Hanson]

21 minutes ago, Honey said:

I so much laughed when Darcey said her favorite color is "white or clear"  Yup, she said clear folks.  Up until now when someone asked my favorite color, I said Plaid.  Not anymore, I am stealing Darcey's favorite color of Clear.  It completely makes sense though, if she could wear clear colored clothing, she would.

I actually said:  "Diamond White!"  before she answered, and she said white!!!

[TrininisaScorp]

1 hour ago, Cammi said:

And speaking unofficially on behalf of the Ethnic Women’s Delegation, Caucasian women- y’all can have his dumb ass. We sign off! 

I had no idea that was all Caesar's social media bullshit.  Mitch, please. 

1 hour ago, Callaphera said:

Speaking unofficially on behalf of the Vanilla Lovers, Ukrainian Division - do we have to? I have some coupons for eggs. Maybe we can make a deal that we're all satisfied with. 

Chiming in (unofficially) on behalf of the South Asian arm of the Ethnic Women's Delegation...no backsies.  We have suffered enough. KPlsThanx.

Angela is suuuuccchhh trash.  Like, I cannot even start on how much trash she is. She looks raggedy as hell, her attitude is bullshit, and I can't believe she has the gull to have opinions on anyone else.  I did, however, laugh like hell at a ton of shit being stuffed in her gigantic bosoms. 

Teri really comes across as a good mom.  She doesn't want to lay down law with her adult-ish child, but she rightfully doesn't want her in a wartorn country. 

Darcey gotta give up on men for a while.  Find yourself.  Like yourself.  Be secure in who you are.  Maybe find an ACTUAL favorite color. And then, maybe, look for a men.  B/c the desperation bait is catching bitchass fish like Jesse (WHY. ARE. YOU. HERE.  ASSHOLE.) and Tom.

Edited October 28, 2019 by TrininisaScorp

[DanaMB]

I can't stand Angela, but the one positive thing I can say is she was spot on when she said reality hasn't hit Omar and Avery yet.

[Callaphera]

For the record, the husband and I - we realized we've been together for ten years this week - quizzed each other on what our favourite colours were during the show. I thought his was green (it's blue) and he thought mine was blue (it's purple). So I asked for a divorce because he clearly doesn't know me. Emma, thank you because without your advice, I wouldn't have realized that I was living with a complete stranger for all this time. 

Oh, wait, he just offered me a brownie. Never mind, marriage back on. 

[sonder]

I don’t find Zied cute. His so so so stuff annoys me. He buys someone a ring with her own money. He has no job. Rebecca has issues. She says he is perfect with the above qualifications! 

[DanaMB]

I posted this in the Pillow Talk thread, but I don't think Tom's sister's point was knowing someone's favorite color. I think she was just trying to point out they don't know much about each other at all, even after 4 years, and used the favorite color as a (poor) example.

[Frozendiva]

I hope Caesar asks Maria what she did with all the money he sent her - did he pay for her nice trip to Dubai - when she claimed her mother was ill or grandmother died or whatever? Does she have a few middle fish she hooks along to fund her lavish shopping lifestyle? He did kinda deserve what he got after letting himself being strung along by her 'promises'.

Angela, you are rude, vulgar, and classless. Michael should not have to do anything more for his Green Card.

Omar, maybe you can find some other Muslim girl who can get you over to the US or whatever. Avery is not going to like Dubai much - no rights there. Not all that great when you are not super-rich. You do have a lot of growing up to do - go to college, get some skills, get a job, travel, etc.

Jeniffer, you came across as a bit unpleasant this evening.

Rebecca, can you get another K1 visa for husband #4? Maybe Tom's sister should ask you about what you really know about Zied.

Tom's sister is right that Darcey is looking for a ring and a wedding and really doesn't know Tom all that well - except for what she wants to see. No interest in getting to know him, to see if they have anything in common, have the same values. Once the killer heels came out of the car, you knew it was Darcey. And then the glammed up evening gown look when everyone else was dressed pretty much business casual.

And why is Jesse there - you'd think he would not want to be a part of this - unless there is still some 'conscious uncoupling' left to do with Darcey - maybe requiring a voodoo doll or something.

[Drogo]

17 minutes ago, DanaMB said:

I can't stand Angela, but the one positive thing I can say is she was spot on when she said reality hasn't hit Omar and Avery yet.

Reality hasn't hit Angela's uterus yet either. 

[Kangatush]

1 hour ago, Honey said:

I so much laughed when Darcey said her favorite color is "white or clear"  Yup, she said clear folks.  Up until now when someone asked my favorite color, I said Plaid.  Not anymore, I am stealing Darcey's favorite color of Clear.  It completely makes sense though, if she could wear clear colored clothing, she would.

I'm so sorry, but she said, "White...pure", not clear.  It's still a great answer for you to use though.  

[hula-la]

36 minutes ago, Callaphera said:

For the record, the husband and I - we realized we've been together for ten years this week - quizzed each other on what our favourite colours were during the show. I thought his was green (it's blue) and he thought mine was blue (it's purple). So I asked for a divorce because he clearly doesn't know me. Emma, thank you because without your advice, I wouldn't have realized that I was living with a complete stranger for all this time. 

Oh, wait, he just offered me a brownie. Never mind, marriage back on. 

Shouldn’t he have offered you cake? Just don’t throw it in his face. 

[sonder]

Do Angela and Caesar live close? They should get to know each other and stay in America. 

[Callaphera]

Just now, sonder said:

Do Angela and Caesar live close? They should get to know each other and stay in America. 

It's a match made in heaven: Angela is looking for an egg to tote, Caesar has coupons for eggs. 

[futurechemist]

I'm genuinely confused.

Is Caesar for real or just trying to boost his acting career?

Is Maria for real or just catfishing for money? Is that actually "Maria" or just the woman who Skyped with Caesar rather than the woman texting with him?

After the Mexico flight "cancellation" I was convinced Caesar was faking it. But why is the storyline still continuing?

I don't think there's a single couple on the show where both people are in it for love rather than a marriage of convenience. Maybe 1 legit couple total between "before" and "other way".

Edited October 28, 2019 by futurechemist

[Adeejay]

When Avery said that she thought it was cute and funny that Zied wore the t-shirt with Rebecca’s photo, I didn’t like the way Tim snapped at her and told her she was 20. It was patronizing and condescending. Just because she is 20 doesn’t mean she can’t have an opinion. As a matter of fact, I was put off by Tim and Jeniffer. I got the feeling they thought they were above the others. They should really think again.

[MajorNelson]

Loved the scenes of Maria in Kiev.  If this is a fictional storyline, they at least went whole hog and invented her back story to give us.

[MajorNelson]

On the tellall, there's a good amount of back and forth among the cast,   But Tim could shut up and I'd be fine.  Speaking of which, Rebecca was doubly insulted over the freak comment - didn't she have Zied's face on a coffee mug?

[gingerella]

The best part of this shit show wS seeing someone calling herself Maria, playing the part of unabashed gold Digger! What an awful excuse for a human being, not that I feel for Cesar because he everything he gets being such a smug moron.

And then my Maria gold digger high was totally bogued by seeing that supreme assclown, Jesse. What a smug fuck he is, asking for coffee like they’re his PAs! I wish they’d have told him, yeah, we have a coffee machine, go help yourself (bitch). How he manages to think we give any fraction of a fuck about him is just beyond...what the actual fuck?!?

[renatae]

3 hours ago, Callaphera said:

For the record, the husband and I - we realized we've been together for ten years this week - quizzed each other on what our favourite colours were during the show. I thought his was green (it's blue) and he thought mine was blue (it's purple). So I asked for a divorce because he clearly doesn't know me. Emma, thank you because without your advice, I wouldn't have realized that I was living with a complete stranger for all this time. 

Oh, wait, he just offered me a brownie. Never mind, marriage back on. 

LOL. We celebrated our 50th this year, and I think he might know my favorite color because I dress in it all the time, lol, but it's never gotten through to him when it comes to jewelry that I prefer rose gold or yellow gold over white gold, and am not too fond of sapphires. Yet, when it comes to actually important things like faith and goals, we know each other very well. Thanks so much, Emma, for letting me know our marriage is on shaky ground, lol.

[LennieBriscoe]

So now Fredo Caesar is "going to meet Maria" in Cuba?! Maybe Johnny Olah can hook him up....

I think "90DF" has coined a phrase! Like, if someone is really late for some event: "Where ARE you, Maria??" Or, if someone buys a Mega-Lottery ticket: "Sure, you'll win! Maybe you'll meet Maria, too!" If you are faced with a daunting task: "Man, this'll be like meeting Maria!"

😁

Edited October 28, 2019 by LennieBriscoe

[Desert Rat]

4 hours ago, Callaphera said:

For the record, the husband and I - we realized we've been together for ten years this week - quizzed each other on what our favourite colours were during the show. I thought his was green (it's blue) and he thought mine was blue (it's purple). So I asked for a divorce because he clearly doesn't know me. Emma, thank you because without your advice, I wouldn't have realized that I was living with a complete stranger for all this time. 

Oh, wait, he just offered me a brownie. Never mind, marriage back on. 

This is terrible. I've been married 30 years and I've never asked my husband about his favorite color.  I have no idea what it is. Clearly, I don't care about him as a person. My marriage is a sham. 

[Honey]

5 hours ago, Kangatush said:

I'm so sorry, but she said, "White...pure", not clear.  It's still a great answer for you to use though.  

Thank you. I choose to hear clear though, and I am sticking with it. Lol

[KateHearts]

Emma, while you are busy lecturing Darcey (whose self-esteem really can't handle much more) about learning Tom's favorite color, why don't you ask him why he didn't mention his two previous engagements? And his answering a question with a question: "well, did you ever ask?" sealed it for me: he's an asshole. He wants to be on TV, he plays a game with Darcey's emotions, he ghosts her after she and the camera crew leaves.  Really despicable behavior, and I'm not a big Darcey fan.

I think Angela's persona has been bloated up by her love of being "famous" and the production team.  "Hey Ange, stuff your important things in your bra and pull them out backstage!  Swear a lot!! Threaten people!" Because, you know, the brash, rude, tell-it-like-it-is Southern country girl persona is really so appealing. 

Tim gets on my nerves. "I'm not gay and I wasn't born a woman and that's not the first time I've heard it and it won't be the last."  Again, it's like he's playing a role of the gender-vague, asexual dude who's okay with raising other people's children and letting others stomp on him and laugh as they emasculate him.  So unappealing.

Could Akinyi be more disinterested? Look at her face on the screen while Shawn talks to Ben. Barely disguised disgust.  Everyone had an opportunity to call her out on her comment about Ben working harder on his physique and NO ONE TOOK IT.  Again, I don't understand anyone who subjects themselves to such humiliation- on national TV, no less.

Rebecca chose the t-shirt comments to make her get up and stomp away? How about showing the scenes of her talking about jumping Zied the second she landed - to her DAUGHTER? (Oh, but she's 21... all is forgiven). Or the fact that she lied about her ongoing divorce? (she got off easy on that). Tim may be annoying as hell, but yeah- wearing your girlfriend's extremely photoshopped face on your flabby belly is a little weird.

[DiamondGirl]

7 hours ago, sonder said:

I don’t find Zied cute. His so so so stuff annoys me. He buys someone a ring with her own money. He has no job. Rebecca has issues. She says he is perfect with the above qualifications! 

Ahem - he was quite clear that although he graciously accepted REBicca’s money, it was his sister’s money that paid for the ring.

I couldn’t stop humming “How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?”  TLC found the answer - pay her enough to appear on camera.

[blubld43]

1 hour ago, KateHearts said:

Emma, while you are busy lecturing Darcey (whose self-esteem really can't handle much more) about learning Tom's favorite color, why don't you ask him why he didn't mention his two previous engagements? And his answering a question with a question: "well, did you ever ask?" sealed it for me: he's an asshole. He wants to be on TV, he plays a game with Darcey's emotions, he ghosts her after she and the camera crew leaves.  Really despicable behavior, and I'm not a big Darcey fan.

I think Angela's persona has been bloated up by her love of being "famous" and the production team.  "Hey Ange, stuff your important things in your bra and pull them out backstage!  Swear a lot!! Threaten people!" Because, you know, the brash, rude, tell-it-like-it-is Southern country girl persona is really so appealing. 

Tim gets on my nerves. "I'm not gay and I wasn't born a woman and that's not the first time I've heard it and it won't be the last."  Again, it's like he's playing a role of the gender-vague, asexual dude who's okay with raising other people's children and letting others stomp on him and laugh as they emasculate him.  So unappealing.

Could Akinyi be more disinterested? Look at her face on the screen while Shawn talks to Ben. Barely disguised disgust.  Everyone had an opportunity to call her out on her comment about Ben working harder on his physique and NO ONE TOOK IT.  Again, I don't understand anyone who subjects themselves to such humiliation- on national TV, no less.

Rebecca chose the t-shirt comments to make her get up and stomp away? How about showing the scenes of her talking about jumping Zied the second she landed - to her DAUGHTER? (Oh, but she's 21... all is forgiven). Or the fact that she lied about her ongoing divorce? (she got off easy on that). Tim may be annoying as hell, but yeah- wearing your girlfriend's extremely photoshopped face on your flabby belly is a little weird.

Lol, at least this tell all wasn't a complete snooze, who would have expected Maria to show up?!

Ben and Caesar: complete losers who feel entitled to a hot wife to bang. So much gross.

Tom: fame whore. Emma: she certainly has done a sudden turn since lending Darcy an ear in the salsa bar. Why didn't she say any of this before, instead of encouraging Darcy to ask him if they were "exclusive" ?? Both she and her brother just wanted to be on tv.

Tim: low testosterone, with accompanying tiny penis. Run Jeniffer. This man will make your life miserable.

Rebecca: idiotic desperation. "I can't lose you!" Um, yes you can and probably will, exactly like you "lost" your previous husbands. 

Angela: go away and never again stain my television.

[Baltimore Betty]

5 minutes ago, DiamondGirl said:

Ahem - he was quite clear that although he graciously accepted REBicca’s money, it was his sister’s money that paid for the ring.

Exactly, where did the 500 dinar go? 

I think Rebecca was in on the ring plot, she forked over the money too easily.  

Did that ring even fit?

Caesar showed the ring to a friend and said "see all those diamonds!" who does he think he is kidding?

[Jel]

Tim and Jennifer all smug? Bishes, please.

Tom is a complete dick.  Next.

Angela is beastly. Come on Michael, no green card, not even a solid gold, diamond encrusted one would be worth being married to her. 

Avery and Omar, I can't ever forgive you for making me agree with Angela. How much of this relationship is love and how much is teenage rebellion?

Ben and Akyni They re in love? Seriously? Were they ever planning to show any evidence of that on the show? Ben has bugged me from day one, but his carrying on over Akyni having one drink and becoming a little more animated just put me off so much. He's a weirdo. Akyni looks poised to step into "high maintenance" mode.

At this point, Caesar is getting what he deserves. If he can't date a regular, age-appropriate, American lady, I suggest he get to buffing and filing tout de suite -- catfish bait is expensive.

The chubby dude, who asked his lip chewing, not-yet-divorced girlfriend for money so he could buy her an engagement ring came across as "the most promising" couple to me.  Ay yi yi.

Edited October 28, 2019 by Jel

[LennieBriscoe]

I'm surprised Darcey didn't cite her favorite color as "Preferably 'D'."

Of course,  we know that the favorite color (or colour) of Tom, Zied, Akinyi, Omar, Jeniffer, Mahkul, and Maria is green. 

[Baltimore Betty]

7 hours ago, Kangatush said:

I'm so sorry, but she said, "White...pure", not clear.  It's still a great answer for you to use though.  

White, like a wedding dress.  She is so transparent/clear.

[Mr. Miner]

6 hours ago, futurechemist said:

Is Caesar for real or just trying to boost his acting career?

He's setting himself up for more disappointment when he will be continually typecast as an unattractive, mentally challenged, asshat loser.

[Spike]

7 hours ago, Kangatush said:

I'm so sorry, but she said, "White...pure", not clear.  It's still a great answer for you to use though.  

The color of the walls in the looney bin.

[gotta watch]

8 hours ago, Honey said:

I so much laughed when Darcey said her favorite color is "white or clear"  Yup, she said clear folks.  Up until now when someone asked my favorite color, I said Plaid.  Not anymore, I am stealing Darcey's favorite color of Clear.  It completely makes sense though, if she could wear clear colored clothing, she would.

reminds me of the movie Precious when a character said her favorite color was "fluorescent beige" 😂

[Jel]

4 minutes ago, Mr. Minor said:

He's setting himself up for more disappointment when he will be continually typecast as an unattractive, mentally challenged, asshat loser.

And yet more, when he goes out of an audition for the role of unattractive, asshat loser and doesn't even get that part.

He's a walking "wah, wah waaaaah" sound.

[JasonH]

I love that Jesse is there! And believe me, Darcy does too. Anything that gets her more airtime, she’ll take. Plus, as Darcy says every other episode, she’s a strong woman. If she says it, you know it’s true.

Also, hearing him say drumma(drama) was worth the price of admission.

[invisiblegirl12]

33 minutes ago, Baltimore Betty said:

44 minutes ago, DiamondGirl said:

Ahem - he was quite clear that although he graciously accepted REBicca’s money, it was his sister’s money that paid for the ring.

Exactly, where did the 500 dinar go? 

In the scene where he asked for money, she tried to hand him cash and he said, "no, not like that. Like this: 5-0-0..." and pointed to her credit card. She handed over the card - not cash - and he went to meet up with his sister. In the later scenes, when he said he didn't use the money, he meant he never used her credit card. I'm guessing that he returned it to her at some point, not having used it.