S03.E18: Her

[GodsBeloved]

6 hours ago, Johnny Dollar said:

Kate and Toby must not be together anymore because this was the first time Toby saw Kevin’s house. The Big Two would never allow themselves to be separated for so long. 

This thought is creepy to me.

[AzraeltheCat]

32 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

I did laugh a little at the rowhouse shown in the listing that Beth was reviewing.  I've been in those style homes in Philadelphia.  If it has four bedrooms, those are going to be pretty small with very limited closet space.  I'd also love to know where they found space in that house for three bathrooms.  Even if two of three were half-baths, that's just not happening.    

The flier did say "newly renovated" so maybe some space was added on?? 

[PRgal]

Another thought:  Kevin and Zoe COULD indeed be together and the child could possibly have been conceived through a donor egg (surrogacy is also possible, but most likely, Kevin would have used both a surrogate and a separate egg donor.  Very few surrogacy situations are "traditional surrogacies" where the surrogate is also the egg donor).

[GodsBeloved]

2 hours ago, PRgal said:

I don’t understand why Kevin (or anyone else) would go out to get food.  I’d just get delivery.  UberEats, etc...

Because the makeup crew haven't decided how to age Kevin yet.

[LaJefaza]

26 minutes ago, GodsBeloved said:

I'm not falling for it being Zoe though because I'm just not. But I don't think Kevin got back with Sophie either. Maybe Kevin adopted the kid and is a single parent.

I know this show loves a mystery reveal, but if they're going the How I Met Your Mother route, dropping breadcrumbs and having us grasping at straws trying to figure out who's the mother of this child for seasons on end, only to pull some foolish switcharoo at the last second, I will SCREAM.

[Conotocarious]

1 minute ago, LaJefaza said:

I know this show loves a mystery reveal, but if they're going the How I Met Your Mother route, dropping breadcrumbs and having us grasping at straws trying to figure out who's the mother of this child for seasons on end, only to pull some foolish switcharoo at the last second, I will SCREAM.

Prepare to scream because I bet that’s exactly what they will do.

[Lady Calypso]

47 minutes ago, txhorns79 said:

I did laugh a little at the rowhouse shown in the listing that Beth was reviewing.  I've been in those style homes in Philadelphia.  If it has four bedrooms, those are going to be pretty small with very limited closet space.  I'd also love to know where they found space in that house for three bathrooms.  Even if two of three were half-baths, that's just not happening.    

I took a look at the flyer a bit closer. It does say that there's a basement component, so it's a three floor townhouse. The townhouse is still going to be smaller than their current house, and they won't have an office room, but there definitely is enough room for three bathrooms and four bedrooms, if one of them is in the basement. But that's the purpose of downgrading; to get rid of all that space in order to save money. The family is either going to have to sell a lot of their stuff or put it in a storage unit. 

Deja will be used to it, but Tess/Annie are going to have to adjust their own priorities. 

[Blakeston]

Last season, when they revealed that we were seeing flash-forwards, didn't we get official confirmation from one of the producers or writers that the flash-forwards were only 12 years in the future - which would mean 11 years from now?

(I hope that isn't considered a comment about a future plot point, because that was just a comment from the production explaining what we'd already seen.)

I remember being shocked that the scenes were only 12 years in the future, because a) Randall looked much older than his late 40s, and b) Tess would be awfully young to be placing a boy in a foster home. 

But I'm fairly sure that's what I read. Does anyone else remember this?

[Lady Calypso]

2 minutes ago, Blakeston said:

Last season, when they revealed that we were seeing flash-forwards, didn't we get official confirmation from one of the producers or writers that the flash-forwards were only 12 years in the future - which would mean 11 years from now?

I don't think we ever got confirmation on how far into the future the flashforwards are. All I know is that Older Tess doesn't look like she's supposed to be 22/23. She definitely looks more 26-29. The actress who plays Older Tess is about 29 as well, so that's why I presume that they're more like 15-20 years into the future. Plus, if Randall's supposed to be 50, that's kind of insulting to make him look way older. Most 50 year olds don't age that quickly. And older Rebecca now looks like she's in her mid to late 80s if it was only 12 years into the future.

Again, we haven't gotten a specific year, from what I've seen. But I think it's safe to say it's closer to 20 years into the future. 

[bybrandy]

33 minutes ago, AzraeltheCat said:

But then Kate pissed me off when she ran to get the nurse instead of tapping Jack, and getting mad at Rebecca for doing the right thing.  Ummm, Kate - you don't run get the nurse, that's what the alarm is for. Also, you could tap your damn kid and tell your mom to get the nurse. Sigh. 

I honestly think she panicked so much when she heard the alarm that she forgot about the foot thing.  Rebecca being more seasoned remembered about the foot thing and went right for it.   However,  I think Kate was in a place where she was ready to panic because Rebecca had her so on edge with all of her nitpiking and because Kate didn't get to ask the question she needed to process everything because question time was eaten up by Rebecca.   

I don't think Rebecca in any way was trying to hurt Kate or make her feel like a terrible, incompetent parent.  But I do think Rebecca's constant interruption of Kate is keeping Kate from settling down and figuring out the mom thing on her own, which obviously needs to happen because every mom is different.

I don't think there are any bad guys here.

[txhorns79]

Quote

I took a look at the flyer a bit closer. It does say that there's a basement component, so it's a three floor townhouse. The townhouse is still going to be smaller than their current house, and they won't have an office room, but there definitely is enough room for three bathrooms and four bedrooms, if one of them is in the basement. But that's the purpose of downgrading; to get rid of all that space in order to save money. The family is either going to have to sell a lot of their stuff or put it in a storage unit. 

There really is not enough room.  With the basement, presuming it is finished, those type of rowhouses are around 1600-2000 square feet.  The bedrooms and bathroom are on one floor, the living room/kitchen is on the main floor and the basement is below grade and often unfinished.  

[PRgal]

1 minute ago, Lady Calypso said:

I don't think we ever got confirmation on how far into the future the flashforwards are. All I know is that Older Tess doesn't look like she's supposed to be 22/23. She definitely looks more 26-29. The actress who plays Older Tess is about 29 as well, so that's why I presume that they're more like 15-20 years into the future. Plus, if Randall's supposed to be 50, that's kind of insulting to make him look way older. Most 50 year olds don't age that quickly. And older Rebecca now looks like she's in her mid to late 80s if it was only 12 years into the future.

Again, we haven't gotten a specific year, from what I've seen. But I think it's safe to say it's closer to 20 years into the future. 

I thought I read it was about 15?  Tess is 10 or 11 (looks much older, but that's because the actress is 13) right now, so 15 years down the line would make her 25-26.  I'm pretty sure Tess's job requires an MSW, and at 22, she'd still be in school.  

[VioletNevermind]

11 hours ago, BusyOctober said:

Of COURSE, Jack speechifies his way into a hospital room before visiting hours.  No wonder the entire family just opines and bloviates for minutes on end, with glistening eyes, a catch in the throat and earnest, aw shucks charm.  They learned it from dear old Dad.  

Deja may not be Randall’s bio kid (and he wasn’t Jack’s), but man, does that Pearson Pontificating gene just get absorbed via osmosis?  Now we get deep, meaningful wisdom from every generation.  At this rate, I expect Little Jack won’t have a “baby’s first word” moment.  Instead he will have a 10 minute oral dissertation on why he needs to quit daycare and just “find his bliss” on his own.

I'm having a tough week and this gave me a solid five minutes of laughter (at work, mind you!).  I've been delivering some dissertations of my own to my friends and family since season one about the constant speechifying on this show.   It almost convinced me not to stick with it, but I'm in too deep now. 

[Tikichick]

So relieved Randall and Beth arrived at the conclusion they are magic together.  I'm not entirely delighted everyone else in the family is actually sacrificing more than Randall to arrive at the solution, but I am happy their family remains intact.  Thinking possibly Randall's obsession with his goals is linked to his anxiety and absolutely needs to be addressed, sooner rather than later.

I would have been annoyed at Deja's speechifying if I didn't think she was actually using it deliberately to demonstrate to him how ridiculous he can be -- and to smack him in the face and wake him up.  Loved when she went into Beth mode and shushed him cold.  She sees very clearly the ridiculousness of his using the circumstances of his birth and adoption as if he deserves to somehow be given slack because of it. 

Love that Kevin showed Tess she's essentially struggling with the same thing as her peers, and that everyone goes through it.    

Loved Rebecca and Kate gaining more insight into their relationship.  Kate in particular needs to learn to open her eyes and see what is actually happening -- and understand how to maturely open her mouth and communicate with her mother and follow her own convictions when needed.  She's far too old to be still mired in teenage rebellion against mom.  

I thought Randall needed to tell Rebecca who he is was due to her being once again medicated.  I took what we saw as at home hospice care.

[Maximona]

4 hours ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

Changing schools sucks.

It does for kids who are in or entering high school. And have a strong set of friends.

Deja will probably benefit being around kids who have something other than a suburban upbringing; Tess is ready to reinvent herself, and Annie is still young enough to relate primarily to her family.  So, I think this is a smart move for Randall & Beth.

49 minutes ago, AzraeltheCat said:

Rebecca annoyed me at the hospital Taking notes is fine.  But you're not the mom, let the dr finish a damn sentence and let the actual parents ask questions first.

Actually, you know, in my experience as an RN, the patients who do the best are almost always the ones that have a support team that are taking notes and asking questions for them.  When a medical catastrophe takes place, it is generally so overwhelming on a personal level that it is extremely hard for the person most directly involved to focus on what's being said to them by healthcare providers.  At my hospital, teaching like, This is what apnea means; this is what bradycardia means, is typically done by the primary nurse who doesn't have another bedside to scurry off to.  So questions like Rebecca's are welcomed and answered.

[Blakeston]

18 minutes ago, PRgal said:

I thought I read it was about 15?  Tess is 10 or 11 (looks much older, but that's because the actress is 13) right now, so 15 years down the line would make her 25-26.  I'm pretty sure Tess's job requires an MSW, and at 22, she'd still be in school.  

I found an interview where Fogelman implies that the flash-forward is 15 years in the future, so I think that's our best bet. 

I agree with the speculation that the only reason we haven't seen Kate is because they don't want to lock the character into Chrissy's current weight. It sounds to me like she and Toby aren't together anymore - but I wouldn't be surprised to see them get back together in the end.

My biggest question is whether Nicky is romantically involved with Rebecca or not. If he is, that would be genuinely disturbing to me. I never had a problem with her getting with Miguel, but moving on from her dead husband's best friend to his brother would be too much. At that point she might as well dig up Jack's corpse and remarry it.

Edited April 3, 2019 by Blakeston

[Phoebe70]

Anyone else rolling their eyes at Deja’s speech?  Teens don’t talk that way. I have yet to hear a teenager use the word “stipend” in conversation. 🙄

[GodsBeloved]

1 hour ago, PRgal said:

Another thought:  Kevin and Zoe COULD indeed be together and the child could possibly have been conceived through a donor egg (surrogacy is also possible, but most likely, Kevin would have used both a surrogate and a separate egg donor.  Very few surrogacy situations are "traditional surrogacies" where the surrogate is also the egg donor).

I think that defeats the purpose though. If Zoe has changed her mind about being a mother, why not have her own baby? Unless of course you are suggesting Kevin has the child then he and Zoe rekindle their relationship.

I'm not seeing Nicky being in the room means he and Rebecca became an item.

It's Kevin's house and he is the one who wanted to help Nicky. Maybe he's staying with Kevin and sitting by Rebecca's bedside, presumably in her last stage of life isn't surprising at all.

Edited April 3, 2019 by GodsBeloved

[bybrandy]

21 minutes ago, Phoebe70 said:

I have yet to hear a teenager use the word “stipend” in conversation. 🙄

Do you work with kids in fostercare whose care givers are given a monthly stipend?   While it isn't a word I'd expect every teenager to know I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't common in the fostercare community where the per child stipend is a thing.  I, however, don't work with kids in fostercare so it may not be something that they interact with at all.   The stipend goes to the foster parents and not to the kids.   But I know some people who foster and we've had discussion about what their stipend does and doesn't cover etc.   

[GodsBeloved]

56 minutes ago, LaJefaza said:

I know this show loves a mystery reveal, but if they're going the How I Met Your Mother route, dropping breadcrumbs and having us grasping at straws trying to figure out who's the mother of this child for seasons on end, only to pull some foolish switcharoo at the last second, I will SCREAM.

LOL

I've been over This Is Us mysteries since the "How did Jack die" mystery.

[ShadowFacts]

21 minutes ago, Blakeston said:

My biggest question is whether Nicky is romantically involved with Rebecca or not. If he is, that would be genuinely disturbing to me. I never had a problem with her getting with Miguel, but moving on from her dead husband's best friend to his brother would be too much. At that point she might as well dig up Jack's corpse and remarry it.

What came to mind for me was he was integrated into the family and has a very strong friendship, he is devotedly at his sister-in-law's deathbed.  No romantic connotations necessarily.  It hit me as very moving.  I think the writers are making a strong move with placing him back in the picture for the future.  His story -- writing, acting -- was the best of this season for me.  Randall and Beth are solid, Kate and Toby's baby is so far healthy and we now know he is OK in the future, Kevin has staked out some possibilities for future fatherhood which we see comes to fruition.  So having Nicky in the mix is a bit of a mystery and an interesting one for me. 

[kili]

Quote

I looked it up on IMDb - Tween Kevin is played by Parker Bates. Kevin’s son is played by Preston Oliver.

Preston did an amazing job of incorporating Parker's acting style to make a convincing Kevin's son. That's one of the things that this show is so good at. They not only cast people who look like the other actors playing the part, but they obviously must be taking the time to help the actors (especially the younger actors) act like they are actually related. It adds a lot of verisimilitude. 

I suspect future Rebecca is blind and that is why Randall announced himself. They didn't give us Kevin's son's name and they like recycling names, so maybe he is Randall too and that is why Randall had to clarify (kidding - they didn't give Kevin's son a name so they could refer to him as Kevin's son....I thought he might be Jack as first). I don't think the toys they are bringing are for stroke victim Rebecca to recover. That would probably be things like lego blocks and clothespins to work on her fine motor skills. I thought maybe a birthday party for one of the next generation kids, but it's nighttime and mostly adults. Maybe it's the Big Three birthday party (probably the last one for their Mom), so they are doing one of their traditional birthday parties (before they started having separate parties) to celebrate with Mom.

The corn sandwiches were bad writing. Pilgrim Rick Jack came up with a better meal when he was lost in the middle of nowhere, there were no open stores and they had to cook it on the room heater. Dude even managed to think of Pizza when he was spiralling out after abandoning his brother.

Edited April 3, 2019 by kili

[BonnieD]

Quote

I think the shocker is that she at some point hooks up with Nicky? 

Why does anyone assume that just because he's there to say goodbye along with the others?

I feel lack of Kate's presence is an open door in case they decide to have her die at some point. This way they can go either way. And they can go any direction they want with Kevin too, solo or married, with a woman we've met or someone completely new. Ditto Miguel. We are kind of assuming he's dead but at this point he could be somewhere taking a much needed nap. Writers keeping options open.
 

Thank god the "will they, won't they" stay together of R and B's relationship is finally over. An agonizing season long slow burn. The once most interesting couple is now the least.

[qtpye]

1 hour ago, LaJefaza said:

I know this show loves a mystery reveal, but if they're going the How I Met Your Mother route, dropping breadcrumbs and having us grasping at straws trying to figure out who's the mother of this child for seasons on end, only to pull some foolish switcharoo at the last second, I will SCREAM.

1 hour ago, Conotocarious said:

Prepare to scream because I bet that’s exactly what they will do.

3 minutes ago, GodsBeloved said:

LOL

I've been over This Is Us mysteries since the "How did Jack die" mystery.

And you know that the mother will die and we will find out that Kevin has been in love with Robin all this time...wait wrong show...sorry, How I Meet Your Mother PTSD is kicking in.

[Mrs. DuRona]

9 minutes ago, kili said:

Maybe it's the big three birthday party (probably the last one for their Mom), so they are doing one of their traditional birthday parties (before they started having separate parties) to celebrate with Mom.

OMG, yes.  That is *such* a Pearson thing to do, haha! 

[Tikichick]

46 minutes ago, Phoebe70 said:

Anyone else rolling their eyes at Deja’s speech?  Teens don’t talk that way. I have yet to hear a teenager use the word “stipend” in conversation. 🙄

I would, if it weren't Randall being slapped square in the face by someone with greater knowledge of the situation.   She took what she's watched him do many times and gave it back to him -- with a classic Beth shut your mouth move thrown in for good measure.    

Deja's propensity to take in the situation -- and feed it right back is something that should be on the daily recommended diet for all of the big three.  I'm hoping she holds up a great big, snarky, mirror to all of them in regards to feeling entitled to talk over others like a steamroller whenever the mood strikes.     

[desertflower]

9 hours ago, happykitteh said:

This may be a crazy theory but I think the "her" everyone is gathered to see is Kate. Showing Rebecca in the bed was just to throw off the viewers. I think something happened to Kate - a serious illness or injury - and she, like Rebecca, is staying with Kevin. She and Toby divorced at some point and that's why Toby said, "Are you sure she wants to see me?" I recall a birthday party for Kate with the Pin The Tail On The Donkey Game being part of the storyline so maybe they're having a party for an ailing Kate. I don't know what the sidewalk chalk connection would be.

I too think the stuff with Rebecca is just to throw off the viewers. They reveal just enough about her so we think they were all going to see her, but then they will probably hit us with some unexpected twist that they were actually gathering to see someone else. Your theory about Kate makes sense.

[JudyObscure]

12 hours ago, bybrandy said:

I thought Rebecca was really undermining Kate at the hospital.   Kate needs a chance to figure this stuff out.   Step back lady.  But I think I might be a party of one there.  I really, really, really did like Kate's moment with Rebecca and when she admitted all of her insecurities weren't going to magically go away so apologizing in the future but I wish Rebecca had said that she was kind of being super a lot at the hospital.

Same here.  It brought back a time when my mother-in-law was with me as a doctor was giving me some really devastating news about my son and she interrupted me as I was asking the doctor a question to correct the way I was pronouncing a word (actually my pronunciation was the preferred usage) but what stunned me and the doctor was that she thought that was important. 

My MIL was smack in the middle of my first  marriage from the first day right up until  our divorce ten years later, and every time I would voice a complaint about her interference, -- choosing where we lived, what apartment we lived in,  what doctors we went to, what jobs my husband had,  and every single aspect of child raising -- I would always hear the same defense, "She means well."  And she did, all the time she was keeping her son from growing up and our marriage from developing, she always meant well.

[Eureka]

9 hours ago, deirdra said:

I thought Toby or somebody mentioned that Kate & Jack were coming together.  Perhaps she was picking Jack up at college or something before coming to see "Her" for the last time.  Toby seemed dejected and others weren't sure he would come, so I think he & Kate break up in the future. Kate is probably obsessed with Jack as she was with her father, with no time for the Tobester.

"Her" may have been on morphine on her death bed and half out of it, which is why Randall, who lives on the other side of the country and is rarely there, felt the need to announce himself.

Yeah, he said he talked to Jack and "they said they'd be coming" or something. If this is 15 years later, Jack is only 15 and isn't going to be driving, so someone would have to be bringing him (unless he's taking the bus, etc.)

[Carly13817]

I loved the end part of the season finale with the glimpse of the future. I just was expecting more of a cliffhanger as I already figured they would show Rebecca as older and possibly with dementia/Alzheimer's. I am happy that Beth and Randall are still together and also that Jack is alive and well. I was wondering where Miguel was. Is he possibly already passed away? I am curious how Kate and Kevin look like in the future? What about Annie and Deja? Away doing their own thing? Who is Kevin's son's mother? So many questions. I am also glad though that Nicky is back in their lives. That song they played at the end is stuck in my head. That is all.

[One Imaginary Girl]

3 hours ago, txhorns79 said:

I did laugh a little at the rowhouse shown in the listing that Beth was reviewing.  I've been in those style homes in Philadelphia.  If it has four bedrooms, those are going to be pretty small with very limited closet space.  I'd also love to know where they found space in that house for three bathrooms.  Even if two of three were half-baths, that's just not happening.    

3 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

The Philly house looked like a row house.  The flyer said fully renovated.  But, yes, smaller than the New Jersey house. A fully finished basement could add a lot of space though.

I have seen basement renovations in Philadelphia in which a new bathroom was put in down there.  My contractor offered that, but I declined, but if I had a house full of people...

I'm probably going to be a PITA next season about Philadelphia stuff.  Dan Fogelman* and Ken Olin both went to Penn, so I hope they will make some effort to be realistic, though they might not have been back here in ages.   I will say that thirtysomething was pretty good at portraying Philadelphia, so I hope that rubbed off.

*edited

Edited April 3, 2019 by One Imaginary Girl

[gonzosgirrl]

36 minutes ago, desertflower said:

I too think the stuff with Rebecca is just to throw off the viewers. They reveal just enough about her so we think they were all going to see her, but then they will probably hit us with some unexpected twist that they were actually gathering to see someone else. Your theory about Kate makes sense.

26 minutes ago, Eureka said:

Yeah, he said he talked to Jack and "they said they'd be coming" or something. If this is 15 years later, Jack is only 15 and isn't going to be driving, so someone would have to be bringing him (unless he's taking the bus, etc.)

If 'Her' is Kate, and she and Toby are divorced, maybe 'they' is Jack and his step-dad?

I'm beginning to wonder if Kate isn't dead though. I mean, with her physical issues, dying relatively young is a concern, and Toby looked so unhappy....  ETA: I just stick on Randall thanking Toby for coming - if it were Kate-related, then either he wouldn't come at all (if there were bad blood - and really, why would his visit be important to Rebecca?), or he would be there as a matter of fact. But if Kate is dead or they are estranged, then it wouldn't necessarily be expected that he would come for Rebecca, except to be there for his son?

Edited April 3, 2019 by gonzosgirrl

[ShadowFacts]

4 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

Beth's boss proved exactly what Randall said.  That Beth was teaching bored housewives how to dance.

I don't know how else to interpret that Beth was asked to teach a class on Sunday to four women that were trying to lose their last ten pounds, that were never going to lose their last ten pounds.

It can also mean that a light bulb went off in her head that there are these kinds of women everywhere, and she can work with them anywhere. Or specialize in children, either way, it made her go and check out Philadelphia immediately. Randall had his moment of clarity when Deja hit him upside the head with her speech. It actually seemed like it was Randall who was reluctant about moving, he mentioned their current house and how they were married there, etc. She was doing whatever it took to 'open the door', and Randall was willing to as well, so they both come out smelling like roses. I still think some underlying stuff needs working out, but these writers aren't going there. Randall + Beth all the way into the future.

[windsprints]

Quote

It's Kevin's house and he is the one who wanted to help Nicky. Maybe he's staying with Kevin and sitting by Rebecca's bedside, presumably in her last stage of life isn't surprising at all.

I agree with you, I think Nicky is staying with Kevin and that's why he is there. Perhaps he & Rebecca bonded & he's sitting with her while Kevin went out to get the food.

I don't think Kate is dead. I think she & Toby have split and Kate is bringing Jack. If Kevin bought the house after they split that would explain why Toby never saw it. We also don't know how long Kevin has had the house. He could have bought it a month ago for all we know.

A few nitpicks but overall I liked the finale.

[Tikichick]

I think Rebecca in the NICU needs to be cut some slack, too.  The situation is tremendously overwhelming for her too and she is giving everything she has to be there for Kate, the baby and Toby.  I think she can be forgiven for not immediately recognizing the time limitations of the doctor, and for being worried about the baby being cold.  It's clear she's doing everything in her power to make sure her grandson will thrive, and her daughter and son in law get logistical support (coffee, walking dog).  

The moment Kate expressed her frustrations Rebecca backed up and found another way to help take care of what needed doing (walking Audio).  She didn't sulk, pout or get offended.  She shut up, removed herself, still helped -- and apologized immediately when Kate came home for any way she had stepped out of line.     

[ams1001]

11 hours ago, Lady Calypso said:

Hey, if Kevin's acting career eventually tanks, maybe he should go into teaching! 

Funny you say that since Justin plays a teacher in the movie "Little" (which I only know from the commercials and will likely not ever see unless I happen upon it on basic cable some day when I'm bored enough).

[Eureka]

28 minutes ago, One Imaginary Girl said:

I have seen basement renovations in Philadelphia in which a new bathroom was put in down there.  My contractor offered that, but I declined, but if I had a house full of people...

I'm probably going to be a PITA next season about Philadelphia stuff.  Dan Futterman and Ken Olin both went to Penn, so I hope they will make some effort to be realistic, though they might not have been back here in ages.   I will say that thirtysomething was pretty good at portraying Philadelphia, so I hope that rubbed off.

I'm thinking you mean Fogelman...Dan Futterman is my cousin and he went to Columbia.

[Nancybeth]

I'm going to guess that the visit to "her" (who in my mind is Rebecca and no one else) is on the Big Three's birthday and that she has Alzheimers.  She has been talking about planning a party for the kids. That's why they have the game and the chalk -- because Rebecca is picturing the Big Three as kids and remembering the kind of activities they did at parties then. Kate may in fact be dead by then, which would make birthdays harder for Kevin and Randall. The show's premiere episode centered around their birthdays, it would only make sense that it ends (whenever it may end) on a birthday. 

[txhorns79]

Quote

I thought Rebecca was really undermining Kate at the hospital.   Kate needs a chance to figure this stuff out.   Step back lady.  But I think I might be a party of one there.  I really, really, really did like Kate's moment with Rebecca and when she admitted all of her insecurities weren't going to magically go away so apologizing in the future but I wish Rebecca had said that she was kind of being super a lot at the hospital.

I feel like Rebecca is in kind of a "damned if you do, damned if you don't," situation when talking about the baby with the doctor.  If she talks to Kate about it privately, Kate will be defensive.  If she asks without discussing it with Kate, Kate will be defensive.  If she says nothing and Kate later finds out that Rebecca knew what to ask and Kate did not, Kate will become defensive.   

[ams1001]

11 hours ago, ECM1231 said:

Thanks to those answering my question as to whose house it was. I re-watched the ending and Toby did say it was Kevin's. I had the same impression as the poster upthread who said Kevin's young son sounded exactly like the actor who plays young Kevin in flashbacks. Upon watching again, I am convinced it is the same kid. I was happy for adult Kevin; he is so good with his nieces and am sure he will be a great dad.

According to IMDB, Parker Bates plays 10-12 year old Kevin and "Kevin's Fantasy Son."

[sara416]

I think Tess saying "I'm not ready" is just as simple as "I'm not ready to say goodbye". I don't know that it is much deeper than that. I know if I was going to say goodbye to a dying relative I would likely not be ready either. Is anyone ever ready to say goodbye to someone?

Call me simple or easily entertained, but I laughed a few times during Deja's speech to Randall. I liked it. I thought it was well done and she showed some real savviness with people by getting him to drive her there. It also speaks to what we have been told is her great writing skill. She has a way with words and used them well. 

I am so, so glad that they had Zoe leave Kevin and not give in to wanting kids. As someone who is also child free by choice, I hate the "you would be such a good mom" speech. I interact with kids every day (I'm a therapist for children and adolescents) and I treat them with kindness, respect, and try and instill a little bit of fun and happiness in their life. I have nieces and nephews that I adore and love spending time with. That does not mean I want to or need to be a mom. Not wanting to have children of your own so often on TV means you have to hate kids or be completely incompetent on how to interact with them. In real life, this is not the case. I wanted to throw my phone at the TV when Kevin was saying how great Zoe was with the girls and how he thinks she would be a great mom. And I'm glad she didn't change her mind.  

Did anyone else find the elderly, dying Rebecca super creepy, or was it just me? Something about her eyes was just really scary. 

[Lady Calypso]

22 minutes ago, windsprints said:

I agree with you, I think Nicky is staying with Kevin and that's why he is there. Perhaps he & Rebecca bonded & he's sitting with her while Kevin went out to get the food.

I agree. I think that Nicky could even be telling Rebecca about Jack before he met her. She did express to him that she wanted to know what Jack was like before he entered her life. He started to a little in his last episode, so maybe he's telling more of his story. I think he's just there as a supportive family member and it's more to show that he's not closing himself off from Jack's family as he tried to do the last time we saw him. He's actively making an effort to step away from his trailer (or who knows, maybe Nicky's trailer is in Kevin's backyard!).

36 minutes ago, icemiser69 said:

And of course Randall possibly resigning would have cost the taxpayers a lot of money.  Those people that were working for Randall would also lose their jobs.   Randall resigning would have had far more consequences than Beth quitting her job moving to Philadelphia and then trying to open her own dance studio. 

True. She's also only had the job for three weeks, so it's not as much of a burden. 

1 hour ago, kili said:

Preston did an amazing job of incorporating Parker's acting style to make a convincing Kevin's son. That's one of the things that this show is so good at. They not only cast people who look like the other actors playing the part, but they obviously must be taking the time to help the actors (especially the younger actors) act like they are actually related. It adds a lot of verisimilitude. 

I agree. It's amazing how a five second cameo of Kevin's son all in the background could STILL reflect the various versions of Kevin so well. I, too, was convinced it was Parker Bates for a second before I realized that the kid was a few years younger, at least the age when Parker first started playing young Kevin. 

Seriously, they do such a great job at casting. 

[One Imaginary Girl]

26 minutes ago, Eureka said:

I'm thinking you mean Fogelman...Dan Futterman is my cousin and he went to Columbia.

Yes!  Sorry.

[gnushell]

I enjoyed this episode after being disappointed for many this season.  Crying has been standard fare except for parts of this season.  But when I saw Nicky, I totally lost it and cried ugly sobs.  His backstory was so profoundly sad and I didn't expect him to survive his lifelong grief.  It looks like he became a person again.

[3 is enough]

Regarding the Kate/Rebecca interactions I give Rebecca credit for not taking offense and immediately going back to Kate’s place.  

As a new grandmother I can attest to the fact that it is not always easy to bite your tongue and refrain from offering advice, and with a preemie the whole situation is more tense and everyone is even more “on edge”.

My personal strategy has been to ask them to tell me what they want me to do and not offer advice unless I am asked.  

[ams1001]

10 hours ago, voiceover said:

Did anyone else brace themselves for the O.Henry-twist of Randall resigning/Beth putting a nonrefundable down payment on the Philadelphia place?

Just me?

I said out loud (to no one), "Is this gonna turn out to be a Gift of the Magi situation?"

[Spencer Hastings]

I don’t excuse Rebecca for much, but her behavior in the hospital can be forgiven. She’s an over processor and to cope she analyzes every little thing.  I get it.  We’ve seen that hospitals in general freak her out and we have seen her over analyze how chairs and outlets look in hospitals as a way to cope.  Her grandson is an extremely precarious situation, her daughter is a band new mother, AND she knows all too well what it’s like to go home without your baby.  She’s doing what she can to protect her own sanity while helping her new grandson. 

Edited April 3, 2019 by Spencer Hastings

[TwoGrayTabbies]

Do the writers have any conception of how hard it is to start a business?  Opening a dance studio would be a huge challenge.  It will require a properly equipped building rental/purchase and qualified instructors.  It’s a non-essential service probably already has a supply to meet the demand.  Not to mention that Beth is out of practice and this is a new city where she hasn’t built up a network.  Wouldn’t it make more sense for Beth to get an urban planning job and teach dance as a side hustle/hobby?

[Dowel Jones]

1 hour ago, icemiser69 said:

Too bad that dance studio owner didn't have the balls to say that to her clients faces. 

I have a relative who owned a dance studio for many years, focusing on children's dance.  One time I mentioned that we sent our daughter to dance academy (another one), and went to the required recitals when they came up.  I laughingly said that it appeared to me that 90% of the kids were there simply as babysitting/activity time, because they weren't really very good at all.  Disclaimer:  I include my daughter in that group.  Anyway, my relative replied that the untalented kids who were there for activity time were the bread and butter of the studio, and that's how she stayed in business.  So, yeah, businesses don't always have the highest opinions of their clients.

[Kath94]

14 hours ago, bybrandy said:

I'm guessing a stroke.  With Alzheimer's they'd have time with it.  It really is the long goodbye.   This seems like something more sudden.   

I agree with this.  Whatever happened to Rebecca, it seems to be an event, not a long, drawn-out process. But, then again, maybe Miguel was looking after her, hiding her condition from the rest of the family & something happened to him.  The family learning of Rebecca's condition all at once could be an event.  Or Rebecca's condition led to something happening to Miguel.  So many possibilities.  Tess not being ready to see her yet seemed odd.  And Toby wondering if the family wanted him there seems to foreshadow Kate no longer being in the picture.  Aargh!  When is the next season???