S11.E01: Divided, They Summer

[Giselle]

1 hour ago, AnnA said:

Hats in the house were always  a big No No when I was growing up.   I still tell my sons to remove their baseball caps in the house.   Unfortunately, now that they're adults they don't always listen.

Us too except for visiting women wearing proper hats and my uncles...

They and their sons were ranchers. If they walked into the house and they were going be leaving within 10 or 15 minutes the cowboy hat stayed on. If they were gonna stay longer or if they were entering someone else's home the hat always came off. 

Edited March 10, 2019 by Giselle

[Giselle]

2 hours ago, Giselle said:

Sorry, I saw I double posted.

Edited March 10, 2019 by Giselle

[Rap541]

I finally got a chance to watch. I think this was a good opening. The only moment that sparked my ire was Luann publically blaming her children for her relapse. No, Luann, your children didn't put a kibosh on your lovely plans because they didn't want you to move, they sued you because you were spending assets that were always supposed to be saved for them. You were stealing from your children and got caught with your hand in the cookie jar in a very public way, and you were embarrassed so you jumped back on the sauce because that's how you cope. That's you. That's not your kids wrecking your rehab. 

I've always thought Luann was the worst of the housewives and this just clinches it for me. 

[The Solution]

These women are all so dysfunctional and obviously mentally ill that it's no longer fun at all to watch this trainwreck. And they all look horrible. Every last one of them. I'm out.

[MadLove]

On 3/8/2019 at 1:07 PM, AnnA said:

 I'm so happy that RHONY is back and I'm absolutely thrilled that Carole isn't on it!    I'm not sure about the new HW.....time will tell.    She reminds me of someone but I have no idea who that might be.

I don't pay attention to what people have on their table or countertop so I didn't even notice the SkinnyGirl product placement.   I'm too busy paying attention to the HW's faces and conversation.    That's probably why hearing LuAnn say "cabaret" 10x in every conversation is going to get old really fast.    If that's why Bethenny goes off on her in the previews, I totally understand.

The one thing I'd love to see this season is the women calling Dorinda out on her drunken episodes, nastiness and pot stirring BS.    It's time she spent a season in the hot seat.

Barbara reminds me of Donna Karan.Took me almost the whole show to figure that out, but better late than never. I'm sooo happy to have these lunatics back. It's always been my favorite franchise.

[FozzyBear]

18 hours ago, ancslove said:

I think Bethenny is best in a crisis that doesn't revolve around Bethenny.  She was great in Cartagena on the boat (calm, comforted Carole when C was vomiting her guts out - at a time when they were already pretty broken up as friends) and in talking both Luann and Dorinda down, and horrible whenever she had to even come close to thinking about herself.  So I can see her being a good, level-headed judge who can see and tell it like it is, without too much emotion.  At her best, she can observe from the outside and then come up with either the underlying causes, or workable solutions.  It's just a real pity that she can't do that for herself, or regarding anything vaguely referencing Jason.

I agree. She’s even alluded to this before. She’s sort of talked around the idea that her childhood was basically an exercise in crisis management so when the shit hits the fan she knows what to do. It’s living in day to day normal problems she’s not as good at.

oddly Ramona can be sort of similar. When things gets totally FUBARed she calms down and gets rational, but she losses her shit over small conflicts like picking rooms in a hotel. Both she and Bethany seem to have an inverse relationship with crisis and personal stakes. The bigger the crisis and the further away it is from them, the better they cope. The smaller the crisis and the closer it is to them the more they completely lose all control. It’s one of the reasons I more or less believe both of them about how damaging their childhoods were. Love them or hate them, they came from somewhere and I don’t think it was anywhere good.

Edited March 10, 2019 by FozzyBear

[Gem 10]

14 hours ago, smores said:

I have known relatives who left a dead person's message on the voicemail for years after their death because they liked to be able to call and hear the person talking.  It would drive me nuts at the time, because it's a bit disconcerting to try to call someone and then suddenly hear a dead person speaking to you, but, as time has gone on, I have realized that I've lost people I don't have any "sound" from, and it's a weird feeling when you realize you can't quite recall the way they spoke anymore.  People hold memorial masses for lost relatives, they do balloon releases or any number of other things to keep memories close and I don't see the harm in sending texts in the immediate aftermath.  Plenty of people left messages on my biofather's facebook wall.  He has been dead for quite a while now and some people still post on his birthday, Christmas, the anniversary of his death to update him on their lives wish him a good holiday/bday or let him know they miss him or love him.  For me, I don't see the purpose, but I get that it makes them feel better to "tell him" that their mutual friend died and now he's got someone to hang out with in heaven, etc.  So, whatever works.  

Is there even an actual product now? (NM, I just googled) She DOES have a product.  Funnily enough, the launch of it was just at the end of Feb.  For all the people who say Bethenny times stuff to the seasons of the show, it's just a crazy accident that Ramona dropped her skin care line a week before the show came back, right?  And is claiming that Dorinda and Sonja LOVE it.

I can't imagine that Bethenny didn't explain that he is dead and can't answer the message.  I'm sure she explained (much like any parent does when you take a child to a grave), that you can always talk to him, he's always with you, etc, but that he's not going to text back because that's not the way things work.  I hope they did both get counseling.  

For me, throwing something in someone's face is kind of like Luann and her whole attitude shift when she was with Tom.  For the year's after she split with the Count, she became Lu, real average girl.  She admitted her husband cheated on her, she became likable and dropped a lot of her snotty pretenses and she didn't swan around like she had a much higher status because she had a man and others didn't.  Then, as soon as she got a man, she was pretty much rubbing it into Ramona and Sonja's face, going on and on about how her life was so wonderful because she was in this relationship and they were just bitter old hags who were jealous.  Ramona couldn't manage to keep her husband without being cheated on, but look at Luann, she had a MAN and he loved her and her life was PERFECT!  That kind of thing.  I'm sure there's a better example, but that's the one that comes to mind with the show most readily.

To me “ throwing something in someone’s face “ is this.  Say Dorinda got you a nutcracker, and you went to her house ten times and she cooked you chicken, and then if you yelled and called her out because she was a drunken mess, she would rant and rave to you and tell you all the things she did for you.  That’s called “throwing things in your face.  If I do something nice for someone and they got mad at me for a reason or another, I wouldn’t get all pissy and tell them everything I did for them.  Some people expect favors after you do something for them, or they expect you to kiss their ass.  They think they own you.  My Mother always told me if you do something nice for a person, forget it .. do it from your heart.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

As far as Tinsley goes, let's say she is vapid and simple, but I LOVE seeing a HW on my TV with her kind of $ and having access to her closet, and seeing her get a fancy car shipped in. And that she has to go back to figuring out how to drive to get around. That is interesting to me, and many rich people don't want us to see behind the curtain. I think it's organic Housewife living, which is what I love about this show. That peek behind the curtain. Tinsley really does not have an agenda. Bethenny to the 9th degree, and most other housewives too shilling their products is no look behind the curtain of wealth. It is a commercial for their hustle. And that's not what I am in the HW franchise for.  it's a fine line I guess, give me 1000 Tinsley's and not the hawking and shilling of wares. Luann is going from UES Countess personna to Life is a Cabaret and that need to hustle it on the show to survive is going to ruin Luann for me. I love her has a character. But not poor, thirsty needing income Luann. Boo. 

I hope when Bravo casts they take this into account. Housewives. Not Salesmen. Though, I am all for women on the hustle. If that makes sense. 

[raiderred1]

On 3/7/2019 at 12:03 PM, Barbara Please said:

LuAnn has an uncanny ability to fake happiness. I almost wish I could do that sometimes. 

So funny that you said this.  I am always reminded of my sister when Lu won't show any emotion but "I'm great! Everything is great!"  Believe me, you don't want to go through life like this. My sis has been unhappily married for 30 years and her daughter went through a horrific crime a year and a half ago and my sister just won't let down her guard.  It's very painful to watch.  I think it is a reason we aren't very close and have never been too close even as kids and we are only 18 mons apart. I am sad for her.  OTOH, me and my bro are very close. 

[raiderred1]

On 3/7/2019 at 12:47 PM, Gem 10 said:

My husband was reading his paper when the Jersey girls were on.  When he saw Danielle, he got scared. Lol.  He said “WTF is that”?

My husband said the exact same thing!  It must be a reaction from anyone that has not been watching these stoopid shows since the jump.

[chewycandy]

46 minutes ago, Alonzo Mosely FBI said:

As far as Tinsley goes, let's say she is vapid and simple, but I LOVE seeing a HW on my TV with her kind of $ and having access to her closet, and seeing her get a fancy car shipped in. And that she has to go back to figuring out how to drive to get around. That is interesting to me, and many rich people don't want us to see behind the curtain. I think it's organic Housewife living, which is what I love about this show. That peek behind the curtain. Tinsley really does not have an agenda. 

Except to get wifed up 😉. But no, I’ve grown fond of Tinsley. There’s something childlike about her but there’s no doubt she’s a smart cookie. 

[Emmeline]

On 3/7/2019 at 10:37 AM, Sharonana said:

I was staring at it too. Her nose is crooked and one nostril is bigger than the other. Something weird happened to her face during the off season. 🤷‍♀️

I have been noticing that her nose was heading east for sometime.  It must be getting worse because so many are commenting this season.  I would think she must have a deviated septum in addition to the cosmetic issues.  I think a rhinoplasty in your 60’s would be quite a change.

I miss Sonja in the townhouse.  This will take some getting use to.  I know it needed work but I liked it.  The new apartment looks small (I know NYC) and generic.

Edited March 11, 2019 by Emmeline

[raiderred1]

On 3/7/2019 at 2:23 PM, UsernameFatigue said:

I went through a situation similar to Beth's. Had a boyfriend for 5 years that I could not commit to. He wanted to get married, I didn't. He then got sick, and I could not break up with him as it would look like I had done so because he was ill. And of course I wanted to support him. I ended up moving 4 hours away for other reasons, but we stayed in touch. Two days before he was to come for the weekend he died suddenly. He had been such a wonderful boyfriend, and person, that I was devastated. Meanwhile, another long time friend had been asking me out but I kept saying no. Three months after my boyfriend/friend died, I went out with this long time friend. We have been together for 22 years now, married for 15. Sometimes a loss like that makes you realize that life is short, and it shocks you into doing something that you may have given a side eye if someone else had done the same. It doesn't mean that you don't continue to grieve for the person that is gone. 

Usernamefatigue, I am so sorry for your loss. I too have gone through this just a few days ago.  My high school sweetheart just died last week and I talked to him the night of his death.  We dated for 5 years 30 years ago and I knew I wasn't ever going to marry him and I finally broke up with him and he was heart broken but we both went on to marry other people and I have a wonderful husband of almost 26 years. I stayed in touch with my HSS and his marriage was not good but he was also an alcoholic.  We lived 1200 miles apart but kept in touch especially about our college team, that's what we had in common.  Anyway, I had, what now seems a strange and sad phone call with him last week where he was REALLY reminiscing about our first meeting/dating and all the stupid stuff we did as teen/young adults. He was quite the jokster so I was giving him a hard time about it being 30 years ago.  He insisted on talking to my parents whom he had not seen in probably 25 years.  He was able to talk to my dad and he just kept saying how much he loved my family. Uh, ok?? I got some strange text from him which I knew he was drinking because it was late in the evening but I wasn't too surprised.  A few days later I get a call from a mutual friend telling me he had heard my HSS had died. I was in shock!  I just talked to him!  My husband(sweetest, kindest man) found his sister's number and I called her. They do not know how he died as they are doing an investigation.  I don't think it was suicide and in a way it made me feel a tiny bit better as I had lost my BFF 21 years before to suicide and I would be crushed to know I had just talked to him and couldn't help him.  The same happened with my BFF and even to this day I wonder if I had gone to her house if I could have helped? It's very painful. Anyway, it has only been 3 days since I found out and I am heartbroken. I had no feelings for this man other than friendship and the memories of us when we were so young.  He will always be my first real love and I just have so many questions.  Before I got the call about his death I had sent him a text that morning, obviously he never answered. Sigh 

Thanks for letting me type this out as it was a bit cathartic. 

[QQQQ]

On 3/8/2019 at 2:35 AM, Duke2801 said:

  On 3/7/2019 at 8:45 AM, SweetieDarling said:

Luann to Barbara: "You're my DYI guru" 

Drink Yourself to Inebriation? Divorce Younger Idiots?

[Giselle]

1 hour ago, raiderred1 said:

Usernamefatigue, I am so sorry for your loss. I too have gone through this just a few days ago.  My high school sweetheart just died last week and I talked to him the night of his death.  We dated for 5 years 30 years ago and I knew I wasn't ever going to marry him and I finally broke up with him and he was heart broken but we both went on to marry other people and I have a wonderful husband of almost 26 years. I stayed in touch with my HSS and his marriage was not good but he was also an alcoholic.  We lived 1200 miles apart but kept in touch especially about our college team, that's what we had in common.  Anyway, I had, what now seems a strange and sad phone call with him last week where he was REALLY reminiscing about our first meeting/dating and all the stupid stuff we did as teen/young adults. He was quite the jokster so I was giving him a hard time about it being 30 years ago.  He insisted on talking to my parents whom he had not seen in probably 25 years.  He was able to talk to my dad and he just kept saying how much he loved my family. Uh, ok?? I got some strange text from him which I knew he was drinking because it was late in the evening but I wasn't too surprised.  A few days later I get a call from a mutual friend telling me he had heard my HSS had died. I was in shock!  I just talked to him!  My husband(sweetest, kindest man) found his sister's number and I called her. They do not know how he died as they are doing an investigation.  I don't think it was suicide and in a way it made me feel a tiny bit better as I had lost my BFF 21 years before to suicide and I would be crushed to know I had just talked to him and couldn't help him.  The same happened with my BFF and even to this day I wonder if I had gone to her house if I could have helped? It's very painful. Anyway, it has only been 3 days since I found out and I am heartbroken. I had no feelings for this man other than friendship and the memories of us when we were so young.  He will always be my first real love and I just have so many questions.  Before I got the call about his death I had sent him a text that morning, obviously he never answered. Sigh 

Thanks for letting me type this out as it was a bit cathartic. 

I'm so sorry for your lost.

[Otherkate]

4 hours ago, FozzyBear said:

I agree. She’s even alluded to this before. She’s sort of talked around the idea that her childhood was basically an exercise in crisis management so when the shit hits the fan she knows what to do. It’s living in day to day normal problems she’s not as good at.

oddly Ramona can be sort of similar. When things gets totally FUBARed she calms down and gets rational, but she losses her shit over small conflicts like picking rooms in a hotel. Both she and Bethany seem to have an inverse relationship with crisis and personal stakes. The bigger the crisis and the further away it is from them, the better they cope. The smaller the crisis and the closer it is to them the more they completely lose all control. It’s one of the reasons I more or less believe both of them about how damaging their childhoods were. Love them or hate them, they came from somewhere and I don’t think it was anywhere good.

Ugh, this is me to a T. I've never really seen it written out like this, but it makes so much sense. Maybe it's why I like her so much even when she's an asshole. For me, as a parent, I spend so much time deliberately trying to make sure that my own children don't feel like THEY have to manage crisis in their own homes growing up that sometimes I'm sure that, while I may be solving that issue, I'm probably creating some other brand new way to fuck them up in the meantime. Ugh. 

1 hour ago, raiderred1 said:

Usernamefatigue, I am so sorry for your loss. I too have gone through this just a few days ago.  My high school sweetheart just died last week and I talked to him the night of his death.  We dated for 5 years 30 years ago and I knew I wasn't ever going to marry him and I finally broke up with him and he was heart broken but we both went on to marry other people and I have a wonderful husband of almost 26 years. I stayed in touch with my HSS and his marriage was not good but he was also an alcoholic.  We lived 1200 miles apart but kept in touch especially about our college team, that's what we had in common.  Anyway, I had, what now seems a strange and sad phone call with him last week where he was REALLY reminiscing about our first meeting/dating and all the stupid stuff we did as teen/young adults. He was quite the jokster so I was giving him a hard time about it being 30 years ago.  He insisted on talking to my parents whom he had not seen in probably 25 years.  He was able to talk to my dad and he just kept saying how much he loved my family. Uh, ok?? I got some strange text from him which I knew he was drinking because it was late in the evening but I wasn't too surprised.  A few days later I get a call from a mutual friend telling me he had heard my HSS had died. I was in shock!  I just talked to him!  My husband(sweetest, kindest man) found his sister's number and I called her. They do not know how he died as they are doing an investigation.  I don't think it was suicide and in a way it made me feel a tiny bit better as I had lost my BFF 21 years before to suicide and I would be crushed to know I had just talked to him and couldn't help him.  The same happened with my BFF and even to this day I wonder if I had gone to her house if I could have helped? It's very painful. Anyway, it has only been 3 days since I found out and I am heartbroken. I had no feelings for this man other than friendship and the memories of us when we were so young.  He will always be my first real love and I just have so many questions.  Before I got the call about his death I had sent him a text that morning, obviously he never answered. Sigh 

Thanks for letting me type this out as it was a bit cathartic. 

I went through something similar years ago and had a lot of the same open questions. My friend called it magical thinking, which it pretty much is, but you'll need to work through it regardless. There's no other option. I read Didion's The Year of Magical Thinking and that did help a bit. Sending you good thoughts!

[NightFan]

So glad to see this back on! I tried to watch Atlanta but it fell flat and Porsha seemed fake. New Jersey I never bothered to watch this season, that show to me has run its course. Bev Hill I am still on the fence on, but if it will just be about dog gate (much like last year was all about showing up late), then I will be out. 

New York has always been my favorite and even more so without boring snobby Carol. 

This episode: was surprised at the lunch with Lu they had a bottle of Skinny Girl on the table. Can they not even have one lunch with a recovering alcoholic without, you know alcohol? I guess not! Meh

Mona is ridiculous with her flirting. She can’t even see the guy is looking uncomfortable. And yes something about her mouth looked odd.

bethany needs to eat a sandwich and come out with a Healthy Girl line

Lu is making excuses re her relapse but she is trying so I gotta give that to her

Tinsley - boring

Dorinda- still likes to rag on others and ignore her own embarrassing behavior - she should take her own advice and clip! Man those replays from last year were hilarious. She probably thinks so too.

Sonja- what can one say. Please don’t talk about windows and orgasms because that was a picture in my head I never wanted but there it was 

Not the eventful first episode I was expecting, but I am full in. 🕺🏻

[Gem 10]

When Dorinda was walking thru the park with that guy, I didn’t like the way she was going down the line saying all the things that Luann did wrong.  Who is she to talk?  She was the worst, getting sloshed at every gathering to the point of getting real sloppy like a real drunkard, slurring her words, etc.  I don’t know how John puts up with her, if they are still together.  She came on the show this season looking embarrassed as she was talking.  I think she is jealous of the other girls for one thing or another.  I wouldn’t want her for a friend if I were them.  Ramona, Sonja and Tinsley don’t bring much to the show but, at least they are endearing.

[BodhiGurl]

1 minute ago, Gem 10 said:

When Dorinda was walking thru the park with that guy, I didn’t like the way she was going down the line saying all the things that Luann did wrong.  Who is she to talk?  She was the worst, getting sloshed at every gathering to the point of getting real sloppy like a real drunkard, slurring her words, etc.  I don’t know how John puts up with her, if they are still together.  She came on the show this season looking embarrassed as she was talking.  I think she is jealous of the other girls for one thing or another.  I wouldn’t want her for a friend if I were them.  Ramona, Sonja and Tinsley don’t bring much to the show but, at least they are endearing.

I was just thinking about that moment on the show - since I rewatched it today and paid more attention. Whatever with Dorinda mentioning the shotgun wedding, uh, Dorinda, weren't you the one solidly behind Lu marrying Tom, even though pretty much all the other women were warning her not to rush into the marriage? And what the hell was up with her listing "going to rehab" as a negative? Dorinda could use some rehab. If John is still with her I suspect, beyond their mutual enjoyment of partying together,  it's because he's just as messy as her -  remember when he showed up at the lingerie thing all sloshed up and ready to rumble? He's just controlling it better on camera now - probably to preserve his business' good name. He and Jovanni - I mean Dorinda, need rehab.

Also upon rewatch I didn't think Luann was blaming her kids for her relapse, she even says she didn't handle it well - thus her spiral downward. It wasn't because of them, it was because of how she handled the situation (she said something to this effect, it's been hours now since I rewatched so I can't quote her - but she didn't blame them). I'm not a Luann apologist, I just paid closer attention to that scene since fellow PTV'rs have brought up her blaming them for her downfall.

I'm ok with Barbra after her debut on the show. Time will tell if she's meant to be more than a one season player.

[Gem 10]

On 3/8/2019 at 3:11 PM, ButterQueen said:

And of course, Dorinda is being a big ole bitch.  I find nothing attractive about her anymore.

 I’m sitting at my table for one, but thought Lu looked gorgeous outside and on her Vespa.  

I feel so bad for Bethenny.....I’m giving her all the room she needs to grieve this season.  It’s so weird, my mom passed away about a year ago, and she was sick and died during the NY season.  The show was so comforting to me during that time.

Crazy Sonja really does have a good heart sometimes.

I love Bethenny’s Hampton house, and I miss Carol.

There are so many things that will remind you of your Mom,always.  After my Mom died, I was in the supermarket buying vegetables, and got hysterical crying when looking at the potatoes of all things.  My Mom as always peeling potatoes at the kitchen table for one thing or another.  Sorry for your loss.  It’s hard.

[lezlers]

On ‎3‎/‎8‎/‎2019 at 5:41 PM, FozzyBear said:

I agree. I wouldn’t t say the average Real Housewife has a great relationship with alcohol. Of course not! They’re all a bunch of narcissist with poor personal boundaries and an inability to learn from mistakes. Perfect recipes for camera ready drunken antics. But for the most part I would say they are on a sliding scale of not understanding limits. Some to more problematic degrees then others. But still mostly just drunk versions of themselves. Entitlement, bitchness, and needy drama queen tendencies turned up to 11.Dorinda is...different. You can literally see her cross over as it happens. Her entire body changes at a certain point. Different body language, speech pattern, mannerism, everything. I’m not saying that makes her an alcoholic or that she needs to quit drinking or that I know what she should do at all. I’m just saying, Dorinda doesn’t become a drunk, sloppy version of herself like most people. She becomes Drunk Dorinda. 

I am saying there is no way no one has ever brought this up to her before she became a Real Housewiy. Just no fucking way.    

Cosign this.  Dorinda is a NASTY drunk and she does, in fact, turn. Luanne was speaking the truth.  And many people have discussed it with her so her whole "that's just a Luanneism" is not only delusional, it's patently false, as evidenced on film.  Does she not recall the conversation with Bethanny on the plane on their way to Puerto Rico after Drunk Dorinda humiliated herself and Bethanny after behaving dreadfully at a business dinner while drunk as a skunk?  Last year's reunion when none of the "dream team" dared to raise their hands when asked if she had a drinking problem made me nuts.  in any drinking assessment, one of the things asked is "does drinking interfere with your personal relationships."  Fuck yes, it does.   She lashes out at everyone when she drinks.  Considering alcohol magnifies who you really are inside, I'd say Dorinda is a deeply unhappy and angry woman.    Her anger at Luanne this season comes from a place of deep denial about her own problem with alcohol.

[lezlers]

On ‎3‎/‎8‎/‎2019 at 7:10 PM, FozzyBear said:

Among my friend/family group nine is on the young side to have a cell phone but not unheard of. Especially in a contentious divorce. For most of my friends that are dealing with co-parenting under hostile conditions, kids get cell phones as soon as they can reasonably use them so neither parent can cut off the line of communication to the other. Nine is about right there. I’m guessing that is what’s going on here. In that case Brynn’s cell phone might even be court ordered. One of my friends has that in his custody agreement. His daughters cell phone has to be in working order and paying the bill is part of their support agreement. If either parent tries to block their daughter from contacting the other on her cell phone they are in violation of the custody agreement. It was a NASTY divorce. All that being said. My nieces and nephews have texted me from their parents phone since they were about 4 or 5. Usually it’s just a series of emojis or “Aunti Fozzybear, bring ice cream!”, but yeah. Nine doesn’t strike me as weird at all. It’s a phone. I knew how to use a phone by nine. I could also cook a simple dinner and walk to the corner store around that age. Sometimes I think we get a little hyper about kids these days. I’ll go see my old ass out the door now.

Who said anything about kids having cell phones?  My daughter texts her nana from my phone.  And I believe Beth said Brynn texted Dennis from Beth's phone and signed the text "from Brynn."   My response was to the poster who said a nine year old texting at all was "inappropriate."  Nothing about having a cell phone (for what it's worth, I agree nine is too young to have your own phone except for under circumstances you described.)

[raiderred1]

3 hours ago, Giselle said:

I'm so sorry for your lost.

Thanks a ton, Giselle.

1 hour ago, Gem 10 said:

There are so many things that will remind you of your Mom,always.  After my Mom died, I was in the supermarket buying vegetables, and got hysterical crying when looking at the potatoes of all things.  My Mom as always peeling potatoes at the kitchen table for one thing or another.  Sorry for your loss.  It’s hard.

My thoughts go out to you and all who have lost their moms. Hugs to all.

[raiderred1]

3 hours ago, Otherkate said:

I went through something similar years ago and had a lot of the same open questions. My friend called it magical thinking, which it pretty much is, but you'll need to work through it regardless. There's no other option. I read Didion's The Year of Magical Thinking and that did help a bit. Sending you good thoughts!

I really appreciate the good thoughts and I will definitely check out what sounds like a wonderful read. 

[AnnA]

Whew!    I finally read this entire thread.   There were so many comments that I agree with......e.g., Dorinda is a nasty drunk and Tinsley is an airhead.  

Of all the posts I read there were two that deserve special mention and cracked me up.   They were both written by @Giselle:

Ramona - "hung her breasts on a pool noodle"

Slurinda - "spittle spewing slurring attack"

[Thumper]

On March 9, 2019 at 12:44 PM, ChitChat said:

I found that odd too.  There's a lot of things that I don't understand about Bethenny.  

I think it's weird too, but maybe it's like journaling?

[Gem 10]

On 3/7/2019 at 4:01 PM, Midnight Cheese said:

Wait, she couldn’t get a mortgage?   Between the show and apparent success of her cabaret stuff, that surprises me.

On Sonja, again: she is now right by a couple of excellent bakeries, exceptional restaurants, and a WF and Williams-Sonoma.  And Jazz at Lincoln Center!   Even if it’s a nondescript high-rise on the outside, Sonja can change her life in a deep and meaningful way if she explores a little.   I know she’s also a hop skip from Beautique... I’m just weirdly sentimental towards her now.  Indentured servant barfery aside, she is now in livable, optimal space, and if she isn’t self-aware*** she can feel lonely and unmoored as before, which would be such a waste because in the here and now of her move, Lady Morgan can have a fresh start for real.   It’s being handed to her given the show income and relative affordability of her new place even if she nets far less than she fantasized in renting out the townhouse.  Sell it Sonja!   Set yourself free for God’s sake!

*** (I know).

Didn’t Luann say that Barbara and Bethenny helped her buy the house upstate when the Count and her kids didn’t let her sell the Hamptons house?  Luann didn’t have enough money at the time.  The upstate house was 1 million dollars.

[biakbiak]

38 minutes ago, Gem 10 said:

Didn’t Luann say that Barbara and Bethenny helped her buy the house upstate when the Count and her kids didn’t let her sell the Hamptons house?  Luann didn’t have enough money at the time.  The upstate house was 1 million dollars.

No she said they did an intervention with her when the the suit about the house became public which led to her entering rehab right before the reunion.

[Gem 10]

On 3/9/2019 at 2:04 PM, Persnickety1 said:

I had an immediate recall of Ramona's Cosmopolitan gig back in the 1980s.

It was the article that featured a pic of her in a red leotard, all oiled up and greasy looking.

She was showing the article to Bethenny, and Bethenny didn't recognize her at first.

I couldn't find a Google image of it, though, dammit.  

Well I just knew something was coming.  Seeing Dorinda teach a class will force me to fast forward.  They couldn’t think of a better gig for her?  How about rehab to get clean?  BTW, is she certified?

[Gem 10]

18 hours ago, Otherkate said:

Ugh, this is me to a T. I've never really seen it written out like this, but it makes so much sense. Maybe it's why I like her so much even when she's an asshole. For me, as a parent, I spend so much time deliberately trying to make sure that my own children don't feel like THEY have to manage crisis in their own homes growing up that sometimes I'm sure that, while I may be solving that issue, I'm probably creating some other brand new way to fuck them up in the meantime. Ugh. 

I went through something similar years ago and had a lot of the same open questions. My friend called it magical thinking, which it pretty much is, but you'll need to work through it regardless. There's no other option. I read Didion's The Year of Magical Thinking and that did help a bit. Sending you good thoughts!

So sad.  No one forgets their first real loves even tho they are now happily married.  It’s good to talk about it, and you know you have friends on this board to get it all out.

[LibertarianSlut]

1 hour ago, Gem 10 said:

Well I just knew something was coming.  Seeing Dorinda teach a class will force me to fast forward.  They couldn’t think of a better gig for her?  How about rehab to get clean?  BTW, is she certified?

Not a Dorinda apologist--just calling them as I see them--and she did mention early on (when she had the really good arms; I kind of agree that her body went to shit) that she used to teach aerobics, and this was one of those facts that made Bethenny manic, and they started pretend-teaching arerobics to one another, complete with Bethenny calling out, "do you want it! Do you want it!  Do you want it!"  I don't know if Dorinda if certified, but she used to teach if we believe her.  

[SunnyBeBe]

On 3/9/2019 at 4:50 PM, KungFuBunny said:

I still think Dorinda is on coke and liquor. She becomes extra paranoid and perceives slights even with just a look. She erupts like a volcano, then she crashes and looks like she is about to fall asleep standing up.

Bethenny told Luann the salad was already tossed when they first went into the kitchen. Then when B started with the I just had a moment and got more emotional, Luann was almost frantic and morphed into the Swedish Chef and grabbed those salad tongs. Then Bethenny with her own frenetic energy screams out what you said above had me cracking up too.

I'm not sure if Dorinda is still doing something, but, I've heard the term "angry or sober drunk, before.  It's supposed to apply to alcoholics who are sober, but, they are not in treatment or AA and are not dealing with their issues. This can make them anger and hard to deal with, even though, they are no longer drinking.  I've also heard the term "white knuckling it," meaning the person is sober, but, are not dealing well/not addressing issues and are hanging on the sobriety by the skin of their teeth.  

[diadochokinesis]

On 3/7/2019 at 8:53 PM, geauxaway said:

In my opinion, a 9 year old texting anyone, let alone my dead ex not boyfriend, is inappropriate.  I don’t even know if I’d let my 10 year old text my mom from my phone, he just doesn’t need that access.

As for visiting the cemetery.  I’d like to meet a 9 year old that has willingly asked to go to a cemetery to talked to a deceased.  I don’t feel that is something most well adjusted kids have on their “to do” list.   

Brynn already has enough on her plate for a 9 year old.  Her parents HATE each other and now her mommy’s special friend died from drugs.  I’d just like the kid to get a break.  Even if she did for some reason ask to text Dennis, B could have kept that off the show.  Her daughter’s grief shouldn’t be on camera if her daughter is not allowed on camera.  She pulled this same thing to a certain extent when she posted a pic of Brynn crying over Cookie’s portrait on IG.  I honestly thought she wasn’t supposed to really speak about her much at all. 

As for a positive on B, like I said before ADULTS handle grief in all sorts of ways.  I won’t judge her at all on how she handles it herself.  

Enh, I’m of a split mind.  It doesn’t really bother me considering that B and Dennis were together in some sort of fashion for awhile. My daughter (7 years old) will text me on my husband’s phone when they go out. She frequently texts with my parents, especially when we lived in Dubai. To me, it is the same as writing a letter or email. 

On 3/8/2019 at 6:10 AM, Reality police said:

I respect your opinion. I do agree that Brynn should be kept out of their show. She has enough to deal with. 

I feel like the Brynn mentions are growing more frequent. I just don’t feel like she was mentioned that much when B came back in season seven.  It has really been last season and the previous one where she was mentioned a lot. It was just more random mentions that were few and far between before that. 

[SallySarue]

On 3/6/2019 at 6:21 PM, TexasGal said:

Holy crap, have we ever seen Lu look so unpolished and just...rough?  Wow.

I noticed that too, and I liked it! She looks real, and not all glammed up all the time.

[TheWorst]

Ramona looks great for her age, but her eyes will always look crazy.

Dorinda is still in denial. I could easily believe she does coke in addition to being a drunk. I think John is her dealer or drinking buddy.

Tinsley is like a less arrogant and less slutty Paris Hilton. They’re both stuck at whatever age they were at the peak of their popularity.

Luann and Bethenny look haggard. Bethenny is the perfect example of how being too skinny ages you.

This season looks entertaining. I don’t miss Carole, America’s House Guest.

[heavysnaxx]

On 3/8/2019 at 8:03 AM, albarino said:

My biggest problem with the whole swim lesson clip was that Ramona said she need to learn how to swim to "drown-proof" herself after last year's boat trip.  I applaud this.  Yet, she shows up in a glamour suit and floats around on noodles.  *Steam*.  I'm a swimmer; if Ro wants to learn these life skills, lose the noodles, learn to float on your back, learn how to tread water, learn how to swim.  Breast stroke using noodles won't help.

The idea of Ramona learning anything is...optimistic. Girl needs to get thrown into some deep body of water, thrash around, and remember to use her powers to summon The Magic Turtle of Time that she can ride across the waves to the land of Guacamola where the men are harassed all the livelong day and the malapropisms are all above asterick (sic).

Edited March 11, 2019 by heavysnaxx

[Rap541]

3 hours ago, heavysnaxx said:

Girl needs to get thrown into some deep body of water, thrash around, and remember to use her powers to summon The Magic Turtle of Time that she can ride across the waves to the land of Guacamola where the men are harassed all the livelong day and the malapropisms are all above asterick (sic).

You know the problem with this? The real problem? Ramona is so untouchable, so Teflon coated, I bet this would and could actually happen!

[CharlizeCat]

I thought Luann also looked rough. Bethenny looks like she's had some kind of word done to her face again, but I can't put my finger on it. It was very obvious (to me) during the final lunch scene in her kitchen. It's like her face suddenly got longer and thinner, plus overly plucked brows, which made her look really haggard. 

Speaking of ...  Sonja looks like she's recently had microblading. Those are some heavy dark brows. 

I liked Tinsley's shorter straight hair, but girlfriend still needs a makeup/fashion intervention.

I think one of the terms about Dorinda is "dry drunk," where a person is no longer drinking but has failed to address the issue(s) that lead to drinking/using/abusing in the first place. 

Barbara's voice and delivery remind me a lot of Erika on RHoBH. 

[Giselle]

On 3/9/2019 at 6:18 PM, smores said:

I have known relatives who left a dead person's message on the voicemail for years after their death because they liked to be able to call and hear the person talking.  It would drive me nuts at the time, because it's a bit disconcerting to try to call someone and then suddenly hear a dead person speaking to you, but, as time has gone on, I have realized that I've lost people I don't have any "sound" from, and it's a weird feeling when you realize you can't quite recall the way they spoke anymore.  People hold memorial masses for lost relatives, they do balloon releases or any number of other things to keep memories close and I don't see the harm in sending texts in the immediate aftermath.  Plenty of people left messages on my biofather's facebook wall.  He has been dead for quite a while now and some people still post on his birthday, Christmas, the anniversary of his death to update him on their lives wish him a good holiday/bday or let him know they miss him or love him.  For me, I don't see the purpose, but I get that it makes them feel better to "tell him" that their mutual friend died and now he's got someone to hang out with in heaven, etc.  So, whatever works.  

Is there even an actual product now? (NM, I just googled) She DOES have a product.  Funnily enough, the launch of it was just at the end of Feb.  For all the people who say Bethenny times stuff to the seasons of the show, it's just a crazy accident that Ramona dropped her skin care line a week before the show came back, right?  And is claiming that Dorinda and Sonja LOVE it.

I can't imagine that Bethenny didn't explain that he is dead and can't answer the message.  I'm sure she explained (much like any parent does when you take a child to a grave), that you can always talk to him, he's always with you, etc, but that he's not going to text back because that's not the way things work.  I hope they did both get counseling.  

For me, throwing something in someone's face is kind of like Luann and her whole attitude shift when she was with Tom.  For the year's after she split with the Count, she became Lu, real average girl.  She admitted her husband cheated on her, she became likable and dropped a lot of her snotty pretenses and she didn't swan around like she had a much higher status because she had a man and others didn't.  Then, as soon as she got a man, she was pretty much rubbing it into Ramona and Sonja's face, going on and on about how her life was so wonderful because she was in this relationship and they were just bitter old hags who were jealous.  Ramona couldn't manage to keep her husband without being cheated on, but look at Luann, she had a MAN and he loved her and her life was PERFECT!  That kind of thing.  I'm sure there's a better example, but that's the one that comes to mind with the show most readily.

I saved my dad's voice mails to me that are on my land line answering machine and those on my cell phone voicemail to a file on my computer and then burned them to a CD.

He's wishing me a happy birthday, or using his term of endearment for me, telling me a joke, saying he loves me, asking if I'm ok, and also mundane stuff.

I'm glad I have that and wish I had some from my mother who lost her ability to speak long before she died.

Daddy's still on my speed dial but I never call.  I had his number cancelled but his speed dial contact is still there at the top right next to my hubby, Mr. Giselle.

[Gem 10]

On 3/10/2019 at 3:11 PM, chewycandy said:

Except to get wifed up 😉. But no, I’ve grown fond of Tinsley. There’s something childlike about her but there’s no doubt she’s a smart cookie. 

I like Tinsley also.  She’s bubbly, cute and has a way about her that evens out the show and some of the misery it brings.  Who else would fall on the floor when brought flowers?

[Dirtybubble]

3 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I like Tinsley also.  She’s bubbly, cute and has a way about her that evens out the show and some of the misery it brings.  Who else would fall on the floor when brought flowers?

I like her as well.  A lot of people give her crap b/c she's boring but as one poster mentioned earlier she's living her carefree life not trying to sell you a product.  God bless B but good lawd she might as well have Skinny Girl stamped across her forehead. 

Tins is fun and silly and I don't find her vain or just horrible humans like those toads on Vanderpump so I say keep her around!  What a sweetie pie

[Giselle]

16 minutes ago, Dirtybubble said:

I like her as well.  A lot of people give her crap b/c she's boring but as one poster mentioned earlier she's living her carefree life not trying to sell you a product.  God bless B but good lawd she might as well have Skinny Girl stamped across her forehead. 

Tins is fun and silly and I don't find her vain or just horrible humans like those toads on Vanderpump so I say keep her around!  What a sweetie pie

I'd bet the skinny bitch has or will have the Skinny Bitch tattooed somewhere.

I like Tinsley too.

[mostlylurking]

I know I am going to hell for saying this but B was on screen for 10 minutes and has already had 20 emotional breakdowns.  It's going to be a long season.

This is just a general comment but why do so many women on these shows either have to be completely sober or are fall down drunks drinking NyQuil for a fix??  Obviously addiction is a serious disease and I'm not making light of that but can no one just have a drink or two responsibly?

My daughter just started swimming lessons and when they practice with the pool noodles I always think of Ramona.  She is such a wackadoo.  Love her.

No matter where Sonja lives she will somehow make it look junky.  I liked her apartment.

I think all the ladies looked great especially, as other posters already noted, after watching the NJ reunion and how EXTRA everyone was.  These ladies just seem so much more comfortable in their own skin.  

[Gem 10]

17 minutes ago, mostlylurking said:

I know I am going to hell for saying this but B was on screen for 10 minutes and has already had 20 emotional breakdowns.  It's going to be a long season.

This is just a general comment but why do so many women on these shows either have to be completely sober or are fall down drunks drinking NyQuil for a fix??  Obviously addiction is a serious disease and I'm not making light of that but can no one just have a drink or two responsibly?

My daughter just started swimming lessons and when they practice with the pool noodles I always think of Ramona.  She is such a wackadoo.  Love her.

No matter where Sonja lives she will somehow make it look junky.  I liked her apartment.

I think all the ladies looked great especially, as other posters already noted, after watching the NJ reunion and how EXTRA everyone was.  These ladies just seem so much more comfortable in their own skin.  

What gets me is they they are on t.v. live in New York City and seem miserable.  They all want a rich guy to marry and take care of them.  Out of all the men in the city, they can’t find one?  Maybe they all hang out in the same places with the same men.  It must be exhausting. They should settle and go on Match. Com and see where it gets them.  Also, they should stop drinking.  While filming, they should have tea in their glasses.  And, leave the help alone and stop making asses out of themselves, especially Dorinda with the drinking.

[CharlizeCat]

I have to confess that I "swim" just like Ramona. I use a pool noodle and do the "breast stroke." I laughed when that swim instructor told Moaner that's what she was "doing" -- so I felt somewhat redeemed.  I can swim, but I wear contacts and also spend quite a bit on my hair highlights (my one earthly indulgence!) even though I wear a swim cap, so I am definitely keeping my face and hair out of the water! I know the lifeguards must get a good laugh when I come in to "swim" my laps back and forth across the pool. 

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, CharlizeCat said:

I have to confess that I "swim" just like Ramona. I use a pool noodle and do the "breast stroke." I laughed when that swim instructor told Moaner that's what she was "doing" -- so I felt somewhat redeemed.  I can swim, but I wear contacts and also spend quite a bit on my hair highlights (my one earthly indulgence!) even though I wear a swim cap, so I am definitely keeping my face and hair out of the water! I know the lifeguards must get a good laugh when I come in to "swim" my laps back and forth across the pool. 

I swim back and forth across the pool and don’t get one hair wet.  And I do the “ doggy paddle”, haha. Who cares. I hate to go under water, and never do.

[SweetieDarling]

Sonja's blog is up. She addresses the Tom & Lu tote bag that Dorinda brought to Ramona's:

Quote

 Nobody’s ever been so afraid to go near a tote bag since Bethenny gave the SkinnyGirl gift bag to Kelly Bensimon!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

[smores]

14 hours ago, Giselle said:

I saved my dad's voice mails to me that are on my land line answering machine and those on my cell phone voicemail to a file on my computer and then burned them to a CD.

He's wishing me a happy birthday, or using his term of endearment for me, telling me a joke, saying he loves me, asking if I'm ok, and also mundane stuff.

I'm glad I have that and wish I had some from my mother who lost her ability to speak long before she died.

Daddy's still on my speed dial but I never call.  I had his number cancelled but his speed dial contact is still there at the top right next to my hubby, Mr. Giselle.

I am bad about taking people off of my rolodex/address book (I have a spreadsheet that I named rolodex, because even though I'm using newer tech, apparently I think it should be the 80s?), it's just too hard to delete my grandparents and other relatives who have died off of it.  I did have to delete my biofather's number off of my phone after someone else popped up on a messaging app as a possible connection with his number.  Obviously it was going to be reassigned, but it was weird to have some random person doing the slutty hold the phone up above your head and pout at it while you take a selfie avatar attached to your dead parent's name in your contacts.  

5 hours ago, mostlylurking said:

This is just a general comment but why do so many women on these shows either have to be completely sober or are fall down drunks drinking NyQuil for a fix??  Obviously addiction is a serious disease and I'm not making light of that but can no one just have a drink or two responsibly?

So is anyone else picturing Uncle Ned in the pantry swigging the vanilla extract? Just me?

2 hours ago, CharlizeCat said:

I have to confess that I "swim" just like Ramona. I use a pool noodle and do the "breast stroke." I laughed when that swim instructor told Moaner that's what she was "doing" -- so I felt somewhat redeemed.  I can swim, but I wear contacts and also spend quite a bit on my hair highlights (my one earthly indulgence!) even though I wear a swim cap, so I am definitely keeping my face and hair out of the water! I know the lifeguards must get a good laugh when I come in to "swim" my laps back and forth across the pool. 

When I was in high school and we had to be in the pool for gym, we had these weird belts you could strap on for "water aerobic walking"  The belts would keep you fully upright and then you spent the entire class basically "walking" through the pool from one side to the other while carrying floating weights.  We looked like morons, but our hair stayed dry!

[Giselle]

13 minutes ago, smores said:

I am bad about taking people off of my rolodex/address book (I have a spreadsheet that I named rolodex, because even though I'm using newer tech, apparently I think it should be the 80s?), it's just too hard to delete my grandparents and other relatives who have died off of it.  I did have to delete my biofather's number off of my phone after someone else popped up on a messaging app as a possible connection with his number.  Obviously it was going to be reassigned, but it was weird to have some random person doing the slutty hold the phone up above your head and pout at it while you take a selfie avatar attached to your dead parent's name in your contacts.  

So is anyone else picturing Uncle Ned in the pantry swigging the vanilla extract? Just me?

When I was in high school and we had to be in the pool for gym, we had these weird belts you could strap on for "water aerobic walking"  The belts would keep you fully upright and then you spent the entire class basically "walking" through the pool from one side to the other while carrying floating weights.  We looked like morons, but our hair stayed dry!

That would be weird.

I've never gotten any messages or texts in in the years since my dad passed. Knock on wood. If I did I guess I'd give him a "Hollywood" number one of those 555-5555 ones that they use for filming. 

[DrSparkles]

On 3/11/2019 at 2:00 PM, SunnyBeBe said:

I'm not sure if Dorinda is still doing something, but, I've heard the term "angry or sober drunk, before.  It's supposed to apply to alcoholics who are sober, but, they are not in treatment or AA and are not dealing with their issues. This can make them anger and hard to deal with, even though, they are no longer drinking.  I've also heard the term "white knuckling it," meaning the person is sober, but, are not dealing well/not addressing issues and are hanging on the sobriety by the skin of their teeth.  

See: George W Bush