S10.E04: Patriot Love Games

[leighdear]

 

ABC should have just faded out and skipped the preview if they wanted to maintain some modicum of respect.

 Why start now?  *LOL*

 

 

Maybe Bradley should be glad he was eliminated the previous episode!  If it had been last night, America wouldn't have been able to see him leave as the tragic hero, on his quest for true love and never feeling good enough, spouting the man-tears.

Yep, his exit will be untainted and pure.  His man-pain was epic and deep.  That is the kind of man-pain that operas are written about!....Hey....wait a minute....

[CorgiNarnia]

Oh hey, by the way, Tasos went home.

 

I feel cheated out of whatever he would have said in his exit interview.

I wonder if he made the, "I'm still open to love..." Bachelor try-out speech.

 

I wonder who the secret admirer is. I don't know if it's a good idea to be a secret. Wouldn't you want to sign your name and get credit for being thoughtful? What if he didn't get a rose, does secret admirer guy reveal himself then?

 

I'm glad I remained spoiler-free because I had no idea that the climax of this two-night event would be ERIC of all people having a dramatic conversation with Andi. I felt that the editors had been careful to edit him positively up to this point out of respect, not that there was much to cover up. Then he has this argument with Andi on his last night, and threw the editors for a loop. I can see why they went this route. I had honestly thought the drama would be someone cluing Andi in on Andrew getting that phone number.

[TomGirl]

Random thoughts:

Why was it fair to have five on one basketball team and six on the other? How could the team with six not win?

I think Marquel is charming and adorable, but I can't see anything between him and Andi. Does anyone else think they might be encouraging Andi to keep him around as long as possible so he won't seem like the totally token non-white that he is?

Speaking of other guys I can't see Andi picking, there's one (can't remember who) who wears a cross around his neck. Andi is Jewish. I can easily see a Jewish woman picking a non-Jewish guy, but not an overtly religious one.

And speaking of still other guys I can't see her picking, I just don't see "Iowa farmer" on her wish list. That said, I think Chris seems like one of the nicest, most genuine, most mature men there. I loved the way he put an arm around Dylan during his sob story confession.

[Adeejay]

My sister and I have different opinions as to what went down between Andi and Eric.  She thinks that Eric was an egotistical blowhard, who couldn’t handle the fact that she wasn’t falling over him.  She believes that he got upset when he found out that she’d  kiss some of the other guys, when they hadn’t so much as held hands.  I think Eric was trying to explain to Andi that he’s seen her being authentic, so he could tell when she was putting on an act.  Unfortunately, there was a miscommunication, she took offense to being called “fake” and all hell broke loose. He was accusing her of doing to him what she did to Juan Pablo.  I believe there was a huge blowout, but because of Eric’s untimely passing, they decided not to show it.

 

I can't see her picking, I just don't see "Iowa farmer" on her wish list. That said, I think Chris seems like one of the nicest, most genuine, most mature men there.

 

I can't see her picking Chris either, and it will be her loss, because he seems like a kind and decent guy.  I know he'd be in my final two, atleast.

[JudyObscure]

I thought Dylan's story was too heavy for The B'Ette, but then I wouldn't be surprised if it's that story that got him selected for the show, with a clear understanding that he would "open up" about it at the first opportunity. I don't think stories like Ashlee's adoption and Emily's dark and stormy morning are disclosed on the show by accident.

I think the reason for the low basketball scores might have been because maybe the game only lasted ten minutes. The guys were probably exhausted from already being smoked like salmon.

I adored those young women! They took such glee from those flying lay-ups over the guy's heads, and they were so cute talking to Andi about which guys were hot.

Andi was so turned on by Brian's play it reminded me that she insists her men be good with a gun. I hope she doesn't put those kinds of skills too high on her list of husband qualities. At the end of the day it doesn't get the lawn mowed.

If the show had edited any of Eric's conversation, I wish it would have been what he said about his faith. That's the kind of thing that might really worry his family.

I would love to see Marquel as the next Bachelor. So funny last night with the bit about breathing excellence.

[Kbilly]

I hope everyone caught Cody's outfit when they arrived in tropical, romantic Connecticut: Scarf and hat and lens-less hipster glasses looking fully swole and cartoony. 

 

Brian draining threes & hitting that half-court shot was impressive. The WNBA girls were great--I loved that Josh knew who Elena Della Donne was and one of the girls, Lindsey Harding, was gorgeous, looked like Sanaa Lathan. I wonder too about the guys' jerseys--why the Rosebuds were professionally-made looking but the others were drawn on.

Josh in the darkened gym, grieving his basketball loss was absolutely hilarious. I hated that I thought JJ looked kinda cute in his uni and roughed-up hair.

 

Andi I thought never looked better than when in her workout clothes and then afterward at the party with her hair down but not so fluffed and primped.

 

I hate when people come on the Bachelor and just have to tell their life story or something dramatic.  Yes, down the line the person can learn about all of that, but they don't need to know it right away.  Let the person get to know your personality a bit first rather than being drummed over the head with the sad story on the onset.

 

I know Dylan kept saying he just HAD to tell her about his past and I didn't understand why. I have lost a sibling too and I just don't think you have to let your personal tragedies define you--let people get to know you. And also the personal tragedies are always told with these "It was a dark and stormy night" narratives. Why not just "I lost two siblings to drug addiction and it was incredibly painful." Later you can tell more. That's just me I guess. Maybe he's terribly depressed and that's why he needs to tell Andi his story? But why go on the show if you're in such a horrible place in life?

[jumper sage]

Hello everyone!  I am so glad to be here. I love this board.

 

Wow, just wow.  Reading all your comments was great.  My contribution is that I have a friend who is bedridden at the moment and is now sharing in my reality craptastic weeks.  We have been watching this together and she was fine with Andi being the bachelorette having seen JuanPablos season.

 

This week she finally says, "Oh Andi is a bitch".  Ha ha.  She also agreed with Eric and his poker face, acting lines.  I nod along having been a captive of this franchise since season 1.  I explain to her that yes Andi is an actress or desperately wants to be.  In my opinion she will never go back to her day job again.  She will flit around from one show to another and from one guest appearance to another forever.  They all do.  Bachelor Pad, Dancing with the Stars, Celebrity Chef........

 

There's more comfort and affection among the guys than between them and Andi.

Absolutely true!  The guys crack me up.  They always do on the Bachelorette.

 

the sheer terror as they all collectively realized what a lifetime with Andi

I know, right?  I too reflect back on Juan Pablo and think I maybe have been to quick to judge the JP/Andi fight.

 

I like Chris.  I liked their date at the races and the interactions with the older couple.  Farmer?  I think he is one of those giant farmers and is loaded.

Edited June 3, 2014 by jumper sage

[JenE4]

I know Dylan kept saying he just HAD to tell her about his past and I didn't understand why.

 

Because the producers told him he had to. This is par for the course: Reveal your sob story on your first date. Some jump the gun and do it on the first night or the first alone time on a group date. But if you don't reveal your sob story by dinner of the first one-on-one date, then you are not There for the Right Reasons or putting your all into the Journey or, like, whatever.

[backformore]

Kbilly: Why not just "I lost two siblings to drug addiction and it was incredibly painful." Later you can tell more. That's just me I guess. Maybe he's terribly depressed and that's why he needs to tell Andi his story? But why go on the show if you're in such a horrible place in life?

 

Absolutely!   I have also lost a sibling.  And i tell people about it in terms of the illness, as it affects my own risk factors.    But I don't ever feel the need to tell about the day I found out about his diagnosis, or the day I found out that he died, or even the last conversation I had with him.    Those moments are too intensely personal.  

When Dylan dragged it out by talking about who called him, what they said, and his mom's reaction, and what he had to do to care for his mom -   too many details for a date, for a TV show.  That's the story you tell your therapist.

[truthaboutluv]

In my opinion she will never go back to her day job again.  She will flit around from one show to another and from one guest appearance to another forever.  They all do.  Bachelor Pad, Dancing with the Stars, Celebrity Chef........

 

 

Ashley didn't, Des hasn't, even Emily who goodness knows I have all my issues with her seems pretty fine settled in Charlotte and Gillian went back to her very successful interior decorating career in Canada. I'm not saying many of these people haven't come on this show "not for the right reasons" (yes I went there) but I actually think many of the Bachelorettes have been genuine about wanting to find a husband, far more so than the Bachelors.

 

And yes, Andi may go the way of Ali who while not jumping from reality show to reality show clearly was out to jumpstart her entertainment reporter career but so far, I haven't seen anything from her that suggests she isn't at all interested in truly falling in love with someone. As opposed to Juan Pablo who it was obvious that his season was going to be a hot ass mess from like the second/third episode.

Edited June 3, 2014 by truthaboutluv

[leighdear]

 

The guys were probably exhausted from already being smoked like salmon.

 

I cannot tell you how much I LOVELOVELOVE this phrase!  *LOL*

[Alapaki]

ABC should have just faded out and skipped the preview if they wanted to maintain some modicum of respect.

 

 

I think if ABC wanted to show any respect (heh) they would've taken advantage of whatever is preempting next week's episode, aired the episode that they showed Sunday last night (did they really think anyone was going to watch on the night of one of the most hyped episodes of Game of Thrones, anyway), and not aired the episode we saw last night at all.

 

They could've simply explained that Andi sent Eric home before the Rose Ceremony after they had a "spirited discussion", it had a carry-over effect on the other guys and the Cocktail Party/Rose Ceremony and yadayadayada.  They could offer to make footage of the one-on-one date and the group date available online.  Have their ad people come up with some make-good for the Casino losing the "promotional consideration", and just move on.

[Bugs Meany]

They could've simply explained that Andi sent Eric home before the Rose Ceremony after they had a "spirited discussion", it had a carry-over effect on the other guys and the Cocktail Party/Rose Ceremony and yadayadayada.

 

That would have spawned all sorts of conspiracy theories about what they were trying to hide.  His family didn't need several days of Internet chatter about what he did that was so out-of-line, they couldn't even show it.

[truthaboutluv]

This exactly. And some would find ways to still spin it as ABC and the show trying to cover their asses and there was probably something so awful and now he's dead they didn't want people to see it, etc. This way, they showed what happened, people formed their opinions (clearly, if the comments here are anything to go by), good or bad.

[Missy Vixen]

An extra-special dedication to Andi the Bachelorette. I might also add that Andi wishes she were as talented at anything in life as the comedy stylings of the late (and still beloved) Madeline Kahn.

 

 

I felt last night's grief-a-palooza (presided over by the oh-so-smarmy Chris Harrison) was one of the more tasteless things I've ever seen. Eric may have been a stealth drama queen. At the same time, a short statement of sympathy for his family, perhaps some photos or a few reminiscences from a family member, and fade to black. I wonder if Fleiss' decision to show Eric's argument with Andi was an extra-special FU to his family as well.

[b2H]

Did anyone notice in the interview at the end of the show with Chris H. and Andi that she NEVER really revealed her left hand? 

 

It was almost as though it had been glued to her thigh.  She did gesture with her right hand/arm, but the left hand was never within camera range.

[Jillybean]

If they wanted to dedicate the last few minutes to Eric, they shoud have showed some outtakes or B-roll footage of him, which his family and friends likely would have appreciated.  Then faded out to his photo and skipped the previews or buffered them with commercials.  Having Andi discuss him as "a member of the family" was so incredibly inappropriate.  Andi didn't know Eric at all.  

Eric's sister emailed Reality Steve:

 

Hi Reality Steve,

 

I just wanted to send you a quick note to thank you for the way you’ve handled Eric’s part on “The Bachelorette.” For a show that invites mockery and cynicism, I appreciate that you treated Eric’s story with such respect. He really was a remarkable person, and I like that you mentioned more than once how his part in the show should be kept in perspective with the rest of his real life. Lots of writers have been respectful, but you’ve handled it with special class. Eric was visiting me when he signed the contract and I begged him not to do it, but when I realized he was set on it I tried to be supportive. As always, he was none other than himself to the end, for better or for worse. He really felt terrible that he made Andi cry.

 

Anyway, I felt the need to express my gratitude to you before I signed out. Best wishes to you in your endeavors.

 

Eric’s sister,

 

Karen Tracy

 

Edited June 3, 2014 by Jillybean

[Jeanius]

I wish Andi had emphasized the pettiness of the exchange in the grand scheme of things. She tried to at the end, but I would have liked to see her apologize for making it such a big unpleasant deal. I like Andi, but she was over reacting. I don't quite get her bringing up the "tired and exhausted" thing ... she is/was an Assistant DA, right? Doesn't that require long nights of studying, then long nights on the job? Cry me a river, Andi. Wait until you have several small children bouncing around in your life. Then call me with your "tired" bs.

 

This unusual situation put many of our fears right out there. What if we have ugly words with a loved one, or even an acquaintance, and they pass away before the apologies can be made? I think Andi was horrified by her last words with him, the way it went down, and the unthinkable aftermath. Unthinkable until it happens. I don't recall a reality show situation like this one in the (too) many years of watching too many "reality" series. Now THIS is reality. We see the future in the present. How often do we get to see something like this play out? And it's not like it's a huge tragedy that ANDI and Eric had the blow out - for all we know, he moved on rather quickly, grew from the experience, and didn't give her a moment's more thought. But it was seeing it play out in front of our eyes .... And it's Andi who has the memory to live with. Again, not that she cared about Eric that much. Seeing it play out in TV land was rather jaw-dropping. I can only guess that the rose ceremony was a hot mess. I think Andi WAS pissed that no one came to help her out. She was really loud.

 

Wondering if the pictures of Tasos in US Weekly or InTouch (not that I read either one, lol!) had anything to do with the decision to not bother showing his exit. (He was licking another dude's nipple. Sorry.)

[truthaboutluv]

If they wanted to dedicate the last few minutes to Eric, they shoud have showed some outtakes or B-roll footage of him, which his family and friends likely would have appreciated.

 

 

They did that when the season started and Chris Harrison stated that they would be dedicating the season to him. I don't think there was any way ABC and the show was going to appease everyone with a situation like this. Look at how some viewers' opinions varied when Cory Monteith, who starred on Glee, passed away. Some thought they should have just canceled the show (which I was one of those who thought that was absolutely ludicrous), some thought they should have recast the part, some were upset by the episode tribute, some thought the producers/writers exploited his death, some thought the episode was fine, etc. So it was very unlikely that there would not be some criticism of ABC and the show no matter what they did, especially as many already watch the show with such disdain and judgment about its entire premise and disdain for the genre (which of course begs the question of why continue watching).

 

But all that said, I am one who had no problem with what the show did. As noted above, sure they could have just not showed the episode and just state that he left but as also noted, that would have likely created a lot of talk, speculation and rumors online and individuals spinning all kinds of stories and opinions. So they showed what happened and turns out it wasn't the most pleasant exit. And so rather than have that just be his last shot on the show and last memory and nothing more, they had Andi talk to Chris Harrison to shed some light on the incident and put some kind of positive closure on the whole thing. 

 

Again YMMV but I didn't find Andi insincere and didn't find anything she said OTT ridiculous. She never said she over-reacted or went on about Eric being the greatest guy ever that she regretted not picking as the one. Instead she acknowledged that there was communication issues between them both, which caused things to simply not work and eventually led to things getting unfortunately messy. But the main thing I think Andi's conversation with Chris showed was the reminder again that life can change and be over so soon.

 

Because the one thing she kept repeating was that she anticipated seeing Eric at the MTA and they would have likely cleared the air and it would have been water under the bridge but instead she will never get that chance. And that's where I thought she looked truly heartbroken because of the fact that her last conversation with him was one where she was upset and angry and that there was no time later to say, "it's okay, we're all good..." As for the "Bachelor family" thing, yeah it may be a little eye roll worthy but with how incestuous that world is, I do think the contestants/former Bachelor/Bachelorettes do develop something of a family. 

Edited June 3, 2014 by truthaboutluv

[Bugs Meany]

I found sort of a silver lining in last night's episode.  Before last night I'd assumed Eric had been sent home the traditional way: one rose left, Eric vs. another guy, 30 seconds of tension and then she picks the other guy.  I was worried she'd forever be wondering what if she'd kept him just one more week.  The way it actually happened, there was no easy what-if scenario; his exit was as mutual as we've seen on the show.

[Armchair Critic]

Wondering if the pictures of Tasos in US Weekly or InTouch had anything to do with the decision to not bother showing his exit. (He was licking another dude's nipple. Sorry.)

 

Dare I say that his profession made me wonder if he was straight?

[legaleagle53]

Wondering if the pictures of Tasos in US Weekly or InTouch had anything to do with the decision to not bother showing his exit. (He was licking another dude's nipple. Sorry.)

 

 

Don't apologize -- just link to the pics (sorry -- gay man here)!

[Lone Wolf]

Does anyone else think they might be encouraging Andi to keep him around as long as possible so he won't seem like the totally token non-white that he is?

 

I do.  And to whomever's credit, I'm no Bachelor(ette) historian but I don't remember a non-white contestant hanging in for 4 episodes, even when there was more than one. So kudos on the PC'ness.

 

Also, it seems like it's taking them longer than usual to get out of the US, and no one-on-one guy has gotten sent home after the date.  Does it take usually take this long for either of those to occur?  Could just be that to me this season seems really repetitive and thus dragging.

[woodscommaelle]

Why are ANY meals served on this show?  I don't think Andi and Dylan did so much as pick up a fork at dinner.  The amount of food on the plate at the beginning of dinner was the same as when they were 'done.'  What's the point of even having food on this show?  No one eats!!!

Edited June 4, 2014 by woodscommaelle

[Jillibean]

I don't think I'm really on team anyone in the Andi/Eric showdown; I think they both could have handled it better. I think Eric was coming from a genuine place, but he brought an enthusiasm to his plea for her to be real that I think came off a bit condescending. As though he were disappointed that she wasn't living up to the standard he was setting of how she was supposed to behave. I also thought there was a bit of an element of feeling like he ought to be treated differently from the other guys, as in--"Look, I know you have to behave that way with THEM, but you shouldn't behave that way with ME." There actually seem to be quite a few guys this season who, even this early on, seem convinced that Andi can't have with anyone else what she has with them. I also felt like I understood her reaction, because it's hard not to take it personally when someone essentially tells you that you're not doing your "job" correctly, and I do think that's what she was perceiving. And it always hurts to be called fake. What I understood less was her need to go tearfully yell at everyone else. But the content of her yelling basically confirmed to me that she was personalizing and misunderstanding what Eric was saying, because she basically defended herself against not trying hard enough and not being genuine in her search for love.  

[FireFoxy]

n my opinion she will never go back to her day job again.  She will flit around from one show to another and from one guest appearance to another forever.  They all do.  Bachelor Pad, Dancing with the Stars, Celebrity Chef........

Ashley didn't, Des hasn't, even Emily who goodness knows I have all my issues with her seems pretty fine settled in Charlotte and Gillian went back to her very successful interior decorating career in Canada.

 

Let's be honest about Ali, anyone who was willing to collapse in a hallway in tears after deciding to leave and then fake a phone call asking to come back has a strong famewhoring gene. She was never in it for love, she wanted the fame. Why do you think she didn't last with Rahbirdo? He wanted nothing to do with it and she did. Emily has a blog and makes a lot of personal appearances. If rumors are to be believed, she hasn't left Charlotte because Ricky's grandparents fund her life and they put the kibosh on her relocating.

 

I am surprised Trista moved to Colorado to be with Ryan considering her adoration for the camera. You can tell Ryan loathes it but does it to humor her. And Meredith basically disappeared after the show. She will always be my fave.

Edited June 4, 2014 by FireFoxy

[TheFinalRose]

Just want to add that I don't think I'm being overly dramatic when I say the dates in CT probably were the worst, ever?  One, it's Connecticut in what looked like very early spring, cold, windy, everything still stark and dead after the gawd awful winter we all lived through. And they left CA for that? Then, the dates! An old train running through some suburban backyards starring the winner of the  "Contestant with the most  truly sad and pathetic back story ever" (also the winner of the Too Soon award as well). Next, let's go to a basketball court and throw some balls around. Whoopee!! For guys, I guess that was great. Next date, Andi gets pushed off the top of building on a really cold and windy day. Finally, the stay is topped off by getting into an ugly argument with a poor guy who dies not too long afterward.  I think the whole trip to CT is one that Andi probably wants to forget. 

[Alapaki]

Just want to add that I don't think I'm being overly dramatic when I say the dates in CT probably were the worst, ever?

 

 

They really were awful.  

 

"Guys, for your fabulous group date you'll get ready, leave your room and . . . go down the elevator."  

 

And, did I miss something, or did I hear Andi tell Dylan after dinner on the Train "I have one more surprise for you", and then . . . they got to blow the train horn?  

[Canada]

Was it just me or were those basketball teams uneven? I feel like red shirt team had 6 players, while Sharpie hearts team had only 5. Did I miss something?

And did we ever discover who wrote the anonymous love letter?

I'm surprised that Tasos went home. I really thought she liked him. I couldn't believe it when Chris Harrison said he was the one sent home in the rose ceremony.

And... Wow!!! Grumpy Cat really doesn't like criticism, does she? I always thought Eric came across as a bit of a douche (love speaking ill of the dead!) but it wasn't like he was wrong.

[NikSac]

So they showed what happened and turns out it wasn't the most pleasant exit.

 

Andi's exit from JP's season wasn't the most pleasant either, so I really didn't have a problem with it. It did seem pretty mutual. It did kinda suck how things went down, but I couldn't picture the two of them being happy together. Which is the point of the show, right? Figure out who you click with?  It's very sad what happened to Eric later, but I've never gotten the impression he was terribly heartbroken over the breakup.

[truthaboutluv]

Andi's exit from JP's season wasn't the most pleasant either, so I really didn't have a problem with it.

Yes but Andi did not die in a tragic accident a few weeks after her blow-up with Juan Pablo.

[NikSac]

Yes but Andi did not die in a tragic accident a few weeks after her blow-up with Juan Pablo.

 

Oh for sure, I think that's what made it so much harder to watch the blow up with her and Eric. But to me there was something... err comforting's not the right word, but it's as close as I can think of right now... that they both seemed to be realizing it wasn't working. I think it would be even harder if he was obviously heartbroken by his time on the show.

[pitchy]

... I think Chris seems like one of the nicest, most genuine, most mature men there. I loved the way he put an arm around Dylan during his sob story confession.

I was really impressed by that -- giving Dytan a neck rub too to lower the tension he was feeling.  The guy is a very confident man and obviously empathetic, and his impulse is to make the other person feel better.  He always seems so good humored too.

 

[alexa]

Yes, the dates in CT were extremely depressing.  There is no reason to leave CA for CT at that time of year.  The Bachelor usually gets beautiful camera footage of their locations, and they clearly struggled to find anything that wasn't gray and depressing.  CT in the fall would be great, or even the summer, but not after a long winter of cold.  There is so much to do in the CA area, I have no idea why they left that for a train ride of gray-ness and a basketball game.  

[Jillybean]

Well, at least we have the mime date to look forward to!

[Dirtybubble]

I think Marquel is charming and adorable, but I can't see anything between him and Andi. Does anyone else think they might be encouraging Andi to keep him around as long as possible so he won't seem like the totally token non-white that he is?

He is rather charming but I see zero connection between he & Andi.  I do think he is the only african american to make it this far.  I would kinda like to see him as the next Bachelor.  He seems like a classy guy.

 

The Eric and Andi feud was a little weird.  The way it was edited made it seem like Andi just flew off the handle over a poker face comment.  And is it just me or did I expect Eric to break into Lady Gaga's Poker Face song at any moment.  I couldn't help but laughing at that.

[Captain Asshat]

Just want to add that I don't think I'm being overly dramatic when I say the dates in CT probably were the worst, ever? 

I have to agree. When I saw the steam train, I was all excited. "They're going to Hogwarts!" What a letdown to find that, no, it was just a short train ride and an uneaten dinner.

Edited June 4, 2014 by Captain Asshat

[Adeejay]

And to whomever's credit, I'm no Bachelor(ette) historian but I don't remember a non-white contestant hanging in for 4 episodes, even when there was more than one. So kudos on the PC'ness.

 

 

During Englishman Matt’s season, an African-American bachelorette made it to the final six.  I remember being disappointed that she didn’t get a hometown visit, because I wanted Matt to visit Brooklyn. And given that we’ve had arguably a “Hispanic” Bachelor, Juan Pablo and winners that were Hispanic (Roberto) and Asian (Catherine), I don’t think they feel a need to be politically correct.  However, one could argue that the main reason they picked Grumpy Cat, (love that) is because they wanted a Jewish Bachelorette.

 

When it comes to the Bachelorettes chasing fame, I think Ali and Trista are the absolute worst.  As for Meredith disappearing off the scene, I believe this was due to her being embarrassed after being dumped by Ian in such a rude, public manner.  By her own admission, she was so humiliated that she turned to the bottle for solace.

Edited June 4, 2014 by Adeejay

[FlyingEgret]

re CT, I wonder if they were originally only staying there overnight before picking up their trans-atlantic flight in NY.  But due to one of the many bad snow storms the northeast had the flight was delayed/canceled so TPTB decided to throw in another date.  It might explain the cheap dates and the home-made basketball jerseys.

[KN2Blue]

First post here! You know I do believe the confrontation was heavily edited to take out anything that might have cast Eric in a bad light. Not that I think he's a horrible person or anything like that. He seems to be an intelligent, adventurous, and quite accomplished fellow. Like Andi said, he was pretty much effortless in everything he tried. But let's face it, the fact that he passed away made things quite complicated for the show, and it would have been in extremely bad taste to even allude to any douchiness on his part. 

 

I'm not trying to suggest that Andi isn't hot-headed, but if you look back at that scene, Eric starts off by saying he's going to stand rather than sit down. So that sets up the entire conversation to be confrontational. Maybe he's just not good at having difficult conversations, but the more obvious choice would have been to sit down, so everyone's more comfortable. Then his opening was certainly not diplomatic. In his confessional, he talks about wanting to get feedback from Andi in their one-on-one time that she feels something, but he starts off by saying he was taken aback that she didn't think he was being open, and he felt she was the one not being open, or even showing her real self to him. Those are two different things. The confessional makes it about the relationship and where he stands, whereas the talk certainly seems to be more about pointing out some failings in Andi's behavior or character, especially as he follows that up with the TV actress comment. That comment was completely unnecessary and definitely put Andi on the defensive. 

 

The discussion about Andi having a poker face comes after the TV actress comment, and I'm sorry, it seems obvious to me that opening a conversation with a comment that clearly implies she's not being real is confrontational, and it is to be expected that she would be upset by that. I'm not going to blame her for getting upset because she felt insulted, and I would have been insulted too. If he had even started off with something like, "when we're together I can't read you and I'm not sure where I stand" that conversation would probably have taken a different turn. 

 

 

 

 

 

[Jeanius]

Trista and Ryan are appearing on that craptastic couples show about reality couples, right? That smells of famewhorism. Why after all these years? And to hang around the likes of Gretchen and Slade? Gross. Something about his trust issues due to a bad breakup before he ever met Trista? Maybe he is afraid that if he doesn't go along with Trista's wishes she will get bored and dump him.

 

Andi is starting to show signs of Reality Fame Addiction Syndrome. I still don't get the sudden switch from Assistant DA to Damsel in search of Prince Charming, so earnestly following the Bachelor Family Script. I agree with those who see Andi making a career out of a few gigs on TV. The DWTS, the TV wedding, etc. Blergh.

[Adeejay]

Andi shouldn’t get her hopes up about Dancing with the Stars.  I find it interesting that while the show tends to extend an invitation to the Bachelor, they don’t to the Bachelorette.  Keep in mind that Melissa Rycroft was not a Bachelorette, but rather, a contestant on the Bachelor.  As a matter of fact, the only Bachelorette that was accorded an invitation was Trista, and she has the dubious honor of being the first “celebrity” ever eliminated from the show.

[MSP]

And, did I miss something, or did I hear Andi tell Dylan after dinner on the Train "I have one more surprise for you", and then . . . they got to blow the train horn?

 

That was my recollection too, and it amused me greatly. That wasn't a "surprise", it wasn't even Michael Scott ice cream sandwiches!

[bosawks]

And, did I miss something, or did I hear Andi tell Dylan after dinner on the Train "I have one more surprise for you", and then . . . they got to blow the train horn?

 

There's a "not the usual bachelorette horn that's getting blown" joke in there somewhere..........

[MyFangirlLife]

Why are ANY meals served on this show?  I don't think Andi and Dylan did so much as pick up a fork at dinner.  The amount of food on the plate at the beginning of dinner was the same as when they were 'done.'  What's the point of even having food on this show?  No one eats!!!

 

I know! No wonder Andi is so "tired" and testy...she's suffering from starvation. 

If I was the Bachelorette I'd be taking the men out for ribs just to see how they all react.

Andi is starting to show signs of Reality Fame Addiction Syndrome. I still don't get the sudden switch from Assistant DA to Damsel in search of Prince Charming, so earnestly following the Bachelor Family Script. I agree with those who see Andi making a career out of a few gigs on TV. The DWTS, the TV wedding, etc. Blergh.

 

On of the reasons I didn't mind Andi on last season of The Bachelor was that she seemed like she had her life together and like she had a good head on her shoulders. She seemed "normal." Then this season of The Bachelorette started off strong with much less bikinis and giggling...but I can see it going down hill. Her actions make it seem like she's ready to give up a normal life and become a C-list celebrity.

[truthaboutluv]

I'm not trying to suggest that Andi isn't hot-headed, but if you look back at that scene, Eric starts off by saying he's going to stand rather than sit down. So that sets up the entire conversation to be confrontational.

 

 

I'm often doing a lot of things while the show is airing (which is why I DVR it) so I often just get bits and pieces. Particularly because the situation with Eric was so divisive, I went back and watched the entire episode and it only confirmed what I already felt. Breaking it down, let's start with the group date. Andi in her talking head again mentions how great their first date was but feeling like things started to stall with them. When they sit for their 1 on 1 time, she asks him how he's feeling about the entire thing and he states that he's happy to be there but there were "things he wanted changed" - which honestly the way he said it sounded kind of arrogant.

 

And then he mentions how formal everything always is. Andi then states that that is in part the nature of the show and spends a good part of the conversation saying that she gets that it is not a normal situation, that she gets that it's not very easy. Then she eventually says that maybe the issue is they, together as a pair, weren't thriving in the situation. In that conversation she doesn't entirely put the situation on him so much as she just thought that together they weren't progressing. And when she mentions them not thriving, he actually responds that her saying "she doesn't thrive is the first time he felt that they were thriving" suggesting I think that what he heard was her admitting cracks in herself with regards to the situation and for him that was real. At which point she had to tell him that no, it wasn't about her but about them together not thriving. Then he starts talking about his family and his religion and she thinks they leave the conversation fine. 

 

And then comes the cocktail party which happens as you described which basically amounts to his telling Andi that he feels like she's been holding back and then more or less calls her fake. Like I said, I'm truly sad that Eric passed away - sad for his family, friends, loved ones and for him who had all this promise. That being said, I really think Eric bit off more than he could chew with regards to the show and the whole process/nature of it was not working for him. Which is fine really because there have been contestants throughout the seasons who have felt this way. But the issue as I said before was rather than his saying that, admitting that the show, the whole premise, the whole atmosphere, set-up just wasn't for him, he basically suggested that the problem was Andi which yeah, she got mad and offended by that. 

 

The other thing, and this was in part because of some of the comments he made in the third episode, something about being surprised how long it was since his 1 on 1 date with Andi, I got the impression that Eric was not used to having to compete for a woman. I do think there was some level of arrogance in him where he was used to being looked at as so attractive, charming, impressive with the world traveling thing and his ego came into play. He probably was not used to having to work for a woman's affection and more than that, being upstaged by others. His reaction to the flowers from Nick being delivered was interesting.

 

Yes it was slightly awkward, especially Andi reading the card with a big goofy grin on her face but someone a little more self-effacing would have cracked some jokes about it and gotten back on track in the conversation and instead he just blanked and had nothing. And I think that was something that played a significant part in how messy and uncomfortable that whole situation got. The Bachelorette was not the show for Eric, at least not unless he was one of those Andi was goofy/gaga over, which he wasn't. And I do think that in part played in his attitude which makes it more douchy that instead he placed it all on her, suggesting she was "always on" and somehow fake. 

 

And I absolutely hate that this sounds like I'm speaking ill of the dead because like I said, I'm sure he was a genuinely kind person. I just don't think he was used to having to fight for a woman's affections or working too hard for her attention and that got to him. 

 

Andi is starting to show signs of Reality Fame Addiction Syndrome. I still don't get the sudden switch from Assistant DA to Damsel in search of Prince Charming, so earnestly following the Bachelor Family Script. I agree with those who see Andi making a career out of a few gigs on TV. The DWTS, the TV wedding, etc. Blergh.

 

 

Again, I won't deny that this very well could be the path Andi takes, but I guess I still don't see the great evidence of her showing "Reality Fame Addiction Syndrome" because I still feel like so far she's done nothing different than say Ashley. Ashley was a smart, successful young woman on her way to completing her medical degree and she went from first begging and whining to Brad not to send her home, then being the Bachelorette herself.

 

And then she met someone and they both went back to their lives where she completed her degree and they're living their lives fairly normally. I also don't think the TV wedding counts as proof of famewhoring since aren't the Bachelor(ette) couples contractually obligated to have ABC air their weddings which is not surprising, considering how so few success stories they have in the damn franchise.

Edited June 4, 2014 by truthaboutluv

[Armchair Critic]

When it comes to the Bachelorettes chasing fame, I think Ali and Trista are the absolute worst

 

Still can't believe Trista publicized her boob job. Poor Ryan.

 

I agree with those who see Andi making a career out of a few gigs on TV.

 

She claims she is a bad dancer so I would think DWTS would be out. Maybe she could be a commentator on court tv shows? To me she doesn't have the bubbly personality needed for a lot of tv gigs.

[violetr]

I'm definitely on Team Andi when it comes to the Eric situation. RIP and all, but I absolutely hate guys who insult women in a passive-aggressive way and then are all "why are you so upset? You're taking it the wrong way. What did I do?" Total bullshit gaslighting behavior.

 

Thank you for this. I'll echo everyone else in not wanting to speak ill of the dead, but if I'd been in Andi's position I would have felt the same way. You can't call someone a phony and then act all bewildered when they're upset. Absolutely agree that it was gaslighting 101.

 

Other than Nick, I'm really not feeling the guys this season. I get that Josh M. is stereotypically handsome, but those big, bulky gym arms make me queasy. And Brian, while sweet, is one of those guys who looks like a tall 8-year-old. Marquel is cute but he and Andi are clearly not into each other. Talk about body language - at one point he had a pillow in his lap as if he were trying to put more distance between them.

[SallyAlbright]

This week made me remember why I started to dislike Andi after her blowup at Juan Pablo. She just jumps into confrontations without stopping to consider whether she misunderstood the other person and whether or not her reaction is warranted. She seems to have a very quick, bad temper. It probably makes her a good lawyer, but I would not want to marry her. I thought it was especially unfair that she went in and scolded the rest of the guys who had no idea why they were being yelled at and did nothing to deserve it. If I were one of them, I'd be second guessing how "perfect" she is. That said, I did like her while she was playing basketball and I do feel bad that she obviously regrets her last conversation with Eric being less than ideal. As for Eric, I really liked what I saw of him and I really feel terrible for his family. He seemed like a really interesting and sweet young man who deserved to live a nice long life. I hope they take comfort in the fact that he saw and did more in his years than most do in a lifetime. 

 

On a happier note, I thought the basketball date was a riot. Brian, while not my type physically, is very sweet and was adorable with his lack of off-court game. I bet he is everyone's favorite teacher back home. Chris, though he didn't get much airtime this week, still seems like such a solid guy. He was very kind and comforting to Dylan, and he just has a quietly confident presence that is very attractive. I don't know if he's really Andi's type, but if not then I hope he is the next Bachelor! He still really looks like McConaughey to me, so it was funny to hear Josh say "alright, alright, alright" in the locker room. Marcus was very sweet literally talking Andi off the ledge, but he is a tad bit intense for my taste, already claiming to be falling in love with her. First date buddy, chill out. As for Josh, I think he is a lot of fun and easy on the eyes but very competitive. Makes me wonder if he is really that into Andi or he just wants to win. Marquel continues to be a riot- I think he's completely in the friend zone, but I just want her to keep him around to entertain us!

[Jillibean]

Andi shouldn’t get her hopes up about Dancing with the Stars.  I find it interesting that while the show tends to extend an invitation to the Bachelor, they don’t to the Bachelorette.  Keep in mind that Melissa Rycroft was not a Bachelorette, but rather, a contestant on the Bachelor.  As a matter of fact, the only Bachelorette that was accorded an invitation was Trista, and she has the dubious honor of being the first “celebrity” ever eliminated from the show.

 

I believe they asked Ashley, but she declined in favor of actually trying to make her relationship work.

 

As for the dates--I'm sure Mohegan Sun paid them a nice amount of money to highlight the resort and the activities.