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S08.E05: Another Catfishing


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25 minutes ago, MegD said:

I kind of took this as Christine feeling like she was the "main mom" for all the kids. Meri and Janelle were out of the house when the kids were small and it's been said that Christine did a lot of the child-rearing. We saw Maddie go to her and tell her first about the engagement before. I think she's used to being the one the kids run first to when they have major news. So I gave her a pass on it. But she should have quit when Mariah resisted.

Or she's bucking for head bitch, she's trying to go over Meri's head lol! I see that sneaky shit in business every day!

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3 hours ago, ghoulina said:

Not to be a Kody defender, but I think he just phrased it oddly.

Yes, that is what I was referring to. I hated he phrased it that way. Words are going to be very important from now on, whether he likes it or not, whether he knows it or not. Think before you speak, Kody! There are younger kids in the family who will be looking towards their parents for information and guidance.

Speaking of guidance, just HOW do you teach a sibling to french kiss? [Shudder]

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30 minutes ago, VedaPierce said:

Or she's bucking for head bitch, she's trying to go over Meri's head lol! I see that sneaky shit in business every day!

That's what I saw, too. Knowledge is power and Christine wanted the power of having a little bit of info about Meri's only daughter over Meri. Not quite Stealth Bitch Robyn maneuvering, but it was definitely a maneuver. 

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1 hour ago, VedaPierce said:

Or she's bucking for head bitch, she's trying to go over Meri's head lol! I see that sneaky shit in business every day!

Bingo.

Robyn is on the outs.  Christine has waited like 22/23 years to be Kody's #1. 

She seems to be an awesome mother figure to Meri and Jenelle's children -- but a real asshole when it came to her own daughter's needs for the wedding.

Edited by CofCinci
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I guess I don't get why the sister wives should have been comforting and tender towards *Meri?* We can judge the inequality of the marriage according to our own standards all we like, and I do, but at the same time Meri chose this, is an adult, professes to still believe in polygamy and is a supposedly devout fundie Mormon. Her beliefs may have changed but her marriage arrangement hasn't. In any other cheating situation, isn't the person being cheated on the one who deserves comfort and tenderness, not the lying cheater involving her kid in her affair and embarrassing her family? Meri doesn't consider herself divorced and she still appears on the show, where she's accepted paychecks for defending her religion and marriage for multiple seasons...In any other situation we might feel bad that their marriage wasn't going well, but it's still not Kody's *fault* she cheated rather than leaving. And he deserves to be left, he's a douchebag supreme. But Meri as victim worthy of tender care? Nah.

Edited by Lm2162
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I'm happy that Mariah is happy and open about who she is and I hope her family is honestly good with it too. But the reality is that they shouldn't be and I want someone to ask them about it. These women has spent their lives in a miserable marriage situation because they believe the only way to heaven is through a man calling them to his planet. With their own words they have said that problems are their fault because God wants them to fix themselves for the man and make themselves worthy of him calling them to his planet. So here their daughter is telling them that she's not now nor ever going to have a man. That is akin to saying she's giving up any chance of going to heaven. If they really believe what they claim to believe, that should really upset them. I want to hear what they think about that. Maybe there is a caveat for that. Maybe Kody can call his unmarried and lesbian daughters. Maybe a lesbian and her partner can get a planet of their own. I doubt it because this is a seriously patriarchal religion. But I could be wrong. I just want to hear it addressed. And if there is no requirement to be married to a man (or a man with multiple women) then I want someone to ask them why they agree to this mess when they are so clearly unhappy. They can't have it both ways. 

Honestly until I hear them address how this affects their beliefs I won't give them pats on the back for being so great and accepting of Mariah, because I won't believe it's anything more than a show for the cameras. 

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My daughter had speech difficulties similar to Truely and I think she started speech therapy in first grade.  She had speech therapy for about three years and was much improved.  I think just maturing helped as well.  Today she has a job that requires speeches and she trains staff across the country, but still runs into words here and there she has trouble pronouncing.  I don't think she even realizes it, but I notice it once in awhile.

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10 minutes ago, riverblue22 said:

My daughter had speech difficulties similar to Truely and I think she started speech therapy in first grade.  She had speech therapy for about three years and was much improved.  I think just maturing helped as well.  Today she has a job that requires speeches and she trains staff across the country, but still runs into words here and there she has trouble pronouncing.  I don't think she even realizes it, but I notice it once in awhile.

I've also seen quite a few kindergarten and first graders go through a few months of speech therapy st school, and the 'baby sounds' are corrected. I don't think Truley not completing her 'r' sounds is that big of a deal at this age either. 

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I think the reason meri divorced Kody is because she thought it was the ultimate sacrifice for him (it was for her) and would make him love her again. Kind of like when Robyn gave meri her sacrifice of her uterus -blechhhh!- she saw how gaga that made Kody for Robyn and thought he would value what meri was giving up for him, for the fambly. Didn't work. He said, heythanksbye, and ran off on yet another honeymoon. 

They were very precise with the time of when their relationship went bad-12 years ago-I wonder what happened exactly 12 years ago that made the relationship go sour...what was the catalyst that they can't seem to recover from....

Edited by VedaPierce
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The scene at graduation, when meri had her stupid meltdown because Mariah wouldn't be able to see her waving at her like a dumbass, because Mariah, on her graduation day MUST see Meri waving at her, had an interesting talking head. Meri said she didn't know her mic was on and it caught her being 'frustrated', well, YEAH, dummy, that's what this show is about! The TRUE MOMENTS, the RILL frustrations, the RILL feelings! Is she for real??? I love that the mic caught that! Finally! A crumb of reality! See, this is the shit that aggravates me, their arrogance that they will control what we see and our opinions of them, and they will control the facts that they want to put out. IT DOESNT WORK THAT WAY ON REALITY TV! And it infuriates me when they keep trying to control it, because that is deceptive. These people live in deception all the time. They want to tell me what to believe about them. Fake fake fake fake, like Elaine's organisms back when she didn't have them.

Edited by VedaPierce
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9 minutes ago, VedaPierce said:

I think the reason meri divorced Kody is because she thought it was the ultimate sacrifice for him (it was for her) and would make him love her again. Kind of like when Robyn gave meri her sacrifice of her uterus -blechhhh!- she saw how gaga that made Kody for Robyn and thought he would value what meri was giving up for him, for the fambly. Didn't work. He said, heythanksbye, and ran off on yet another honeymoon. 

They were very precise with the time of when their relationship went bad-12 years ago-I wonder what happened exactly 12 years ago that made the relationship go sour...what was the catalyst that they can't seem to recover from....

Kody and Meri's bankruptcy was 12 years ago.  Maybe he lied about their finances???

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@3girlsforus, I'm so confused about that too. It's all well and good that they accept Mariah, but if they actually believe in their religion doesn't that mean she lost her way to heaven and is committing a grave sin? It's good in one sense that their daughter is more important than their beliefs, but if they don't really have those beliefs...Why are they doing this? 

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2 hours ago, chuckity said:

Wasn't Mariah one of the (only) kids who was insistent she was going to lead a poly lifestyle herself?

As far as I recall , yes.  And now we know why.  More kids, female companionship and less man. 

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My earlier post about Meri receiving no support revolves around the idea of family loving someone in the family no matter what they do.  It does not mean the family likes what happened, that is something completely different.  I agree that Meri chose this path with the catfish, but when the truth was realized, there she was scared, frightened by what could come to pass and the family gave her nothing but blame and accusation.   My sister has been gone for years and we weren't all that close, but when she was told her cancer was terminal, I was the first one she called (both our parents were gone).  She chose me over her husband and two daughters, despite her mild estrangement from me.  I sure didn't hang up on her and I put my hostility aside to be there during her return home for hospicecare (she was gone a few days later).  

No, I am not equating cancer with catfishing, but her sister wives and moron of a husband all but rejected her and made her feel much worse than she already did.  Some benefit of being in a plural marriage.....NOT.

That said, Kody is not planning any participation in fixing the marriage.  Nancy may not get that, but Meri sees the handwriting on the wall.  So beside finding out her relationship with Kody is beyond repair, now her daughter makes this grand announcement, ensuring that Meri will not only not have any more children of her own, but more than likely no grandchildren either.  I take this to mean her part of Kody's planet is going to be all but vacant, save for her.  Her world here and beyond will be very sad and lonely.  Once she adjusts to both of these concepts, she may well be able to make some good decisions about her future with this family.  They have been clear that they love her only on their terms and those terms are very limited.

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7 minutes ago, b2H said:

That said, Kody is not planning any participation in fixing the marriage.  Nancy may not get that, but Meri sees the handwriting on the wall.  So beside finding out her relationship with Kody is beyond repair, now her daughter makes this grand announcement, ensuring that Meri will not only not have any more children of her own, but more than likely no grandchildren either.  I take this to mean her part of Kody's planet is going to be all but vacant, save for her.  Her world here and beyond will be very sad and lonely.  

such an empathetic comment.  thank you.  I really feel for Meri right now.  

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Just a side question: Are you sure it's "Planet" that they're talking about for the afterlife, or is it "Plane?" Not as in "airplane," but "plane of existence?" That might make slightly more sense than "planet" for an afterlife, but then again, I write fantasy and science fiction for a living.

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3 minutes ago, riverblue22 said:

My daughter and her wife have three amazing and wonderful children.  I am related to one of them biologically but I love them all as my beautiful grandchildren.  Lots of lesbians have children.

That's why I said more than likely. 

Considering how not having any more children has affected Meri, once the other grandchildren arrive, she may well feel even left out.  I am looking at this purely through Meri's eyes (for the record, my niece is also a lesbian in a committed but not formalized relationship - no children involved at this point).

12 minutes ago, okerry said:

Just a side question: Are you sure it's "Planet" that they're talking about for the afterlife, or is it "Plane?" Not as in "airplane," but "plane of existence?" That might make slightly more sense than "planet" for an afterlife, but then again, I write fantasy and science fiction for a living.

Just to be sure, I did a Google on FLDS planet, and yeah, it is planet, not plane.  

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5 minutes ago, b2H said:

That's why I said more than likely. 

Considering how not having any more children has affected Meri, once the other grandchildren arrive, she may well feel even left out.  I am looking at this purely through Meri's eyes (for the record, my niece is also a lesbian in a committed but not formalized relationship - no children involved at this point).

Just to be sure, I did a Google on FLDS planet, and yeah, it is planet, not plane.  

*thud* lol

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Quote

Just a side question: Are you sure it's "Planet" that they're talking about for the afterlife, or is it "Plane?" Not as in "airplane," but "plane of existence?" That might make slightly more sense than "planet" for an afterlife, but then again, I write fantasy and science fiction for a living.

You expect this cockamamie religion to make sense?

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All LDS people are taught they will have their own planet in the afterlife. Well, the man will. If the woman has been obedient, he will allow her to live on the planet with him producing spirit children for eternity. 

I think it's more likely than not that Mariah will have children. In some states, 60% of same sex couples are raising children. And as sperm donors and surrogacy have recently become much more accessible, the number will rise. A federal law was recently passed that doesn't allow for discrimination against same sex couples by adoption agencies. Even with all the discrimination of the past and the many structural barriers, 25% of same sex couples are currently raising kids, and only 50% of heterosexual couples have them now anyway-- fewer and fewer people are having kids at all, so there's no guarantee you'll have grandkids regardless. I assume it will become a majority very soon due to the new law.

I guess I'm more cynical about Meri, I don't believe she was ever truly scared or frightened except about getting caught in what she had done wrong, and about possibly not being able to be seen as a victim. Her sister wives and even Kody have made it clear that they feel she was a victim. They've gone to therapy and attempted to preserve her reputation and paint her as the innocent in the situation. Robyn, Janelle, and Christine have all made it clear that she was being "threatened" and how bad they feel for her. They've spoken out against people who insulted her on the internet and refer to her as a catfishing "victim," not an active participant. Kody has urged her daughter and TV audiences to forgive her, and has publicly taken the blame for her affair which was actually her choice, not his. In my opinion that is more kindness and compassion than she even deserves. What else were they supposed to do exactly? They've shown her quite a bit of love. Personally I didn't see a shred of blame or accusation from them. On the contrary, they've made endless excuses for her and painted her as a naive, angelic survivor of violence.

Edited by Lm2162
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45 minutes ago, okerry said:

Just a side question: Are you sure it's "Planet" that they're talking about for the afterlife, or is it "Plane?" Not as in "airplane," but "plane of existence?" That might make slightly more sense than "planet" for an afterlife, but then again, I write fantasy and science fiction for a living.

99.99% sure it's planet.  

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3 hours ago, CofCinci said:

Meri wasn't referring to the Disney trip.

Were there two trips to California, then?  

I haven't memorized all the details, but I thought I remembered Mariah being on the Disney trip.  So when she was talking about the car ride being creepy I was imagining Mariah in the backseat.  

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Agree that I'm sick of hearing about being catfished and the predatory angle.  Red flags were there but Meri was lonely and not in a good place with Kodouche and she wanted to believe in the fantasy.  They need to address the root cause, Meri needs to take ownership, and then they need to move on.  Stop with the "see, I wasn't the only one. Manbearpig is real!  It really happened."  Okay, and?  So there are more sad, lonely, less than smart people.  So what.

In addition from taking ownership in her part and getting through her feelings, Meri also needs to stop using Robyn's kids as human shields.  She did it in the trip to confront Mariah which turned into her avoiding any real communication and getting butt sore over bad eyebrow makeup, and now she's doing it with the baby to announce the trip.  Put on your big girl panties and woman up, or at least just hold a pillow to comfort you.

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I'm surprised no one has mentioned the part when the photographer was taking pictures of FT and Mykelti - Christine's daughter (I think) mentioned that FT explained what a french kiss was to them.  I was totally shocked by that.  I'm no prude, but a 20-something man has no right to show or explain that to a pre-teen.   I agreed when Christine seemed to be going off the deep end on that. 

Edited by MissT
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6 hours ago, Granny58 said:

Not sure that's fair.  Meri is just a human and will have human reactions.  She is/was miserable and lonely, and an empty nester after a lifetime of disappointment.  She had been hugely invested in her daughter for Mariah's entire life and now Mariah was living away.  It's not like Mariah was a toddler and Meri was distracted.   Agree, though, that the catfishing storyline has been done to death and needs to stop now.  

I agree that Meri has been heavily invested in her daughter's life for the most part. And I won't begrudge her any struggles with being an empty nester. I know how hard that can be. But I feel like Meri's reaction to Mariah's coming out was due to her having no idea this was coming, due to MERI not being told first, alone. She feels she doesn't even know her own daughter. And the two HAVE been estranged lately. IMO, Meri did have an online affair. And the worst part was, she lied about it. And continues to lie about it. I don't care if she's honest with us, but it's quite clear she is attempting to keep the charade up with her family as well. THAT, IMO, is the biggest reason Mariah has been cold to her. So my point was, if Meri hadn't gotten wrapped up in this mess, or had extricated herself from it in an honest and genuine way, she may not have lost that closeness with Mariah....and therefore might have found out about Mariah's "big news" in some way other than being lumped in the room with 5 other people on national TV.

 

6 hours ago, mamey2422 said:

I've never liked Kody but something that has come out in the past couple of episodes is that Meri asked Kody to not be around. Not sure of the extent but it sounds like Meri asked him to not come to the house or sleep there. She used her "bugging" concerns as a reason in the past but I think she was all in with Sam and wanted nothing to do with Kody. Obviously, Kody played a role in this and he should have probably fought harder to be with Meri but I feel like Meri has been very deceptive on this point of forcing Kody away. 

I agree, which is why I can kind of understand Kody's hesitancy to work on things off camera. I mean, personally, I don't think on-camera therapy can ever be truly effective. But I think Meri is shady as hell and likes to present things on TV very differently from how they went down.

 

4 hours ago, CofCinci said:

n retrospect Meri feels fear and anxiety over the "what could have happened" but at the time she was giddy, excited and hopeful.  Revisionist history.  Monday morning quarterback.  Hindsight 50/50, etc.

Yup. And the pictures from that trip prove it. 

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1 minute ago, ghoulina said:

I agree that Meri has been heavily invested in her daughter's life for the most part. And I won't begrudge her any struggles with being an empty nester. I know how hard that can be. But I feel like Meri's reaction to Mariah's coming out was due to her having no idea this was coming, due to MERI not being told first, alone. She feels she doesn't even know her own daughter. And the two HAVE been estranged lately. IMO, Meri did have an online affair. And the worst part was, she lied about it. And continues to lie about it. I don't care if she's honest with us, but it's quite clear she is attempting to keep the charade up with her family as well. THAT, IMO, is the biggest reason Mariah has been cold to her. So my point was, if Meri hadn't gotten wrapped up in this mess, or had extricated herself from it in an honest and genuine way, she may not have lost that closeness with Mariah....and therefore might have found out about Mariah's "big news" in some way other than being lumped in the room with 5 other people on national TV.

Oh, ok, I see what you mean.

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7 hours ago, ghoulina said:

But, seriously, forcing her family to make centerpieces for SEVENTY tables? Damn. What a brat. 

In fairness, I thought I heard 70 as well, but then when Christine was retelling, I believe it was 17.  Doesn't help that their normal pronunciations are so skewed. 

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About Mariah being not matching their faith and losing her entrance to Heaven or whatever, I dated an LDS guy in college (secretly, because I was not Mormon ) and he explained the LDS belief in Heaven as having layers. I forgot the words now but he said there was a really bad place where really bad people go. Then there was kind of an ok place or places where people who are generally good people go when they are not Mormon or particularly good Mormons. Then there was a Celestial Kingdom (or something like that) where LDS go if they follow the tenets of their faith. He never used the word "planet," for good reason probably , but he made it sound like the people in the middle levels would be able to interact with the people on the higher levels.

 

 

I have no idea if any of that is true or whether it applies to AUB/ The Browns' Church of the Holy Wetbar but if it is true and they do share those beliefs, could it be that they believe Mariah will still fall somewhere in the middle ground of Heaven and just be all right for eternity?

Edited by sucker4reality
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So, finally saw half the episode so far and was happy to see Meri and Kody admit their problems run pretty deep and that the catfisher and the public probably picked up on it. I know I did, you could just read them and see they were sweeping things under the rug and not dealing with them.

I really hope they can repair their relationship but as Nancy said, it's gonna be harder for them than a regular couple. 

Think I may have to wait for another day to finish this monster episode but it's been interesting so far (nice break from weddings, doilies and wedding preparations, but of course I've got more to go!).

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2 hours ago, VedaPierce said:

I think the reason meri divorced Kody is because she thought it was the ultimate sacrifice for him (it was for her) and would make him love her again.

I see this too. Meri, IMO, has a long history of being the martyr. I don't think she's WANTED to do 90% of the things she's done in this marriage, but she thinks if SHE offers it up, she'll be the big hero. I'm pretty sure she was the one who brought both Jenelle and Robyn into the family. She has been seeking Kody's approval from day one.

 

2 hours ago, b2H said:

 

My earlier post about Meri receiving no support revolves around the idea of family loving someone in the family no matter what they do.  It does not mean the family likes what happened, that is something completely different.  I agree that Meri chose this path with the catfish, but when the truth was realized, there she was scared, frightened by what could come to pass and the family gave her nothing but blame and accusation.

 

I'm guessing part of the problem is Meri's refusal to be honest about it. She keeps up this pretense that she was just looking for a friendship, that she was completely duped into this, that all of her flirty pics and videos were because she was being blackmailed. I don't buy it for a second and I don't think the family does either. It's kind of hard to forgive and move on when someone isn't owning up to their part in it all.

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1 hour ago, LadyChatterly said:

Not gonna lie, you guys, the most exciting part of the episode (for me) was finding out Meri was at a restaurant just over a mile from where I live! :) That was NOT Atlanta, it was Alpharetta, 30 miles north of Atlanta.

These days pretty much anywhere in north Georgia seems to be referred to as "Atlanta"

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There was so much to discuss, I forgot about the scene where they talked about mykelti and FT demonstrating French kissing... I think Jesus himself  reached down and covered my eyes and ears so that wouldn't be burned into my subconscious. I don't buy it, isn't the one who said that (I was multitasking so I didn't see who said it) like 14-15? Im sorry but I'm fairly confident even the Duggar children know what that is... my barbies were doing it as long as I remember, how does anyone over the age of 10 not know that? I don't care how sheltered you are. At one point in the talking heads with Christine's accent I thing she was saying "that tony" but for a few seconds I thought she said fat tony. 

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Meri's framework does not compute after hearing Mariah state that she told Meri several times (all summer) that she was being catfished while Meri was wishing Mariah would "appreciate" her relationship with the Catfish. 

Poor poor Meri was so afraid   looking over her shoulder while taking walks. What about the fear that Mariah could be a target...when she didn't know what was going on or what could happen to her?

No "I need you to be careful" 

Meri chose to hold on to that shovel & dig as deep as possible...as a dramatic victim. Thousands of calls & hundreds of voicemails. She built the case against herself. 

Lonliness is no excuse. Get up off your lonely lazy ass & go engage with people you know exist. 

Now she has a strong bond with another lonely online soul to create some sort of strange Pan Am Catfish widows club...laughing smirking & exchanging all their war stories. That's not letting go & moving on. That keeps the focus & energy in the same dysfunctional  place...from another angle.

Edited by Sista Snarky
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15 hours ago, this-one-is-mine said:

Good for Mariah. And good for the parents in being accepting of her (although it's kind of a bare minimum expectation, IMO. If you cut off your kid for being gay you're pretty much the world's biggest shitbag). Mechelle and Jim Boob Duggar surely wouldn't let any of their kids come out on national television. So yay Browns, you're definitely not the shittiest family on TLC!

I'm actually impressed with the apparent acceptance of Mariah.  I'm not so sure LDS parents would react in this way.  How long ago did they give up on conversion therapy, involving electrical shocking while looking at same sex images?

10 hours ago, TomGirl said:

I may be in a small minority here, but I love Truely, lisp and all.  What a character! 

I enjoy Truely.  She lives in her own reality, but her siblings indulge her in it.  I'm wondering how old she is.  Wikipedia used to list birthdates for all the children and wives, but that seems to be gone.  I know that schools have very specific ages before they begin speech therapy.  My cousin's son struggled with Rs and another letter.  He received therapy for the other letter, but they wouldn't provide therapy for Rs until he turned six.  Apparently six is the cutoff before considering inability to pronounce Rs a problem.  Truely may be receiving speech therapy behind the scenes.  Speaking for my cousin (I'm embarrassed to say this), she thought her son's speech impediment was "cute", and she never worked with him privately.  But she's very laid back, like Christine, and knew it would be addressed by his school.  Most people choose to have their schools address this issue, as it's part of the screening process.

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1 hour ago, sucker4reality said:

About Mariah being not matching their faith and losing her entrance to Heaven or whatever, I dated an LDS guy in college (secretly, because I was not Mormon ) and he explained the LDS belief in Heaven as having layers. I forgot the words now but he said there was a really bad place where really bad people go. Then there was kind of an ok place or places where people who are generally good people go when they are not Mormon or particularly good Mormons. Then there was a Celestial Kingdom (or something like that) where LDS go if they follow the tenets of their faith. He never used the word "planet," for good reason probably , but he made it sound like the people in the middle levels would be able to interact with the people on the higher levels.

 

 

I have no idea if any of that is true or whether it applies to AUB/ The Browns' Church of the Holy Wetbar but if it is true and they do share those beliefs, could it be that they believe Mariah will still fall somewhere in the middle ground of Heaven and just be all right for eternity?

This is interesting. If this does apply to whatever the Browns believe and they could ditch Kody for a more 'middle of the road' heaven, I'd do it. Why be in hell now for higher level of heaven that still includes Kody when you can be happy now and be in a decent heaven later too that would be even better because Kody wasn't in it.

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I'm still baffled why Meri can claim to be lonely when their family has staked out the entire end of the cul-de-sac.

Robyn and Christine must be home quite a bit, or in and out between errands. We're still not sure how Janelle spends her day. For Meri to sometimes say how great their large family is, and the next time we hear her saying she's lonely, is an indication she's depressed, unhappy and not interacting with the others.

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I believe Truly was born in 2010, in the spring. Wasn't she born right before Kody married Robyn? And that was May 2010. So yea, if Truely is 6.5, she might have JUST started speech therapy on her R's this year. I think she'll be fine. 

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I thought Meri looked like she really enjoyed herself on the Atlanta trip. Good for her.

I'm gonna get flamed for this, but I don't think Mariah is really gay. I have never looked at her social media accounts but I think Mariah is totally and completely confused. Her family is nuts, and for 20 years, she has watched her mom get treated like crap by Kody. He eventually dumps her legally for Robyn, and Mariah herself later goes away for college, where she meets all sorts of different people with new ideas. Next comes the publically humiliating catfish (the banana pic alone would force me into hiding), and 2 sisters getting married, at least one to a questionable character. I have never seen her express interest in girls. Ratings are not great, and I think she saw this announcement as a ploy for attention. As pointed out here, this announcement is contrary to their religious planetary beliefs, so the parents by right should not be supportive. It just doesn't make sense to me.

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7 hours ago, Granny58 said:

Not sure that's fair.  Meri is just a human and will have human reactions.  She is/was miserable and lonely, and an empty nester after a lifetime of disappointment.  She had been hugely invested in her daughter for Mariah's entire life and now Mariah was living away.  It's not like Mariah was a toddler and Meri was distracted.   Agree, though, that the catfishing storyline has been done to death and needs to stop now.  

I agree with you completely.  Plus, let's not forget that Mariah whined to Kody that she wasn't even "liking" her mother prior to the Catfish episode.  I think Mariah was struggling with ordinary becoming an adult issues, and it's very common to take it out on the person you know loves you the most.  You feel safe that your mother will forgive you.  In the meantime, she's not quite that comfortable with turning her ire on Kody, he has twenty-something other children, and she took his side in all of their marriage issues.  I think Mariah was allowed to avoid dealing with these issues.  She was able to go back to college, stay with one of the other wives, spend her time with her multitude of siblings.  Whereas Meri wanted to confront the issue head on. 

I get very irritated with how cruely Mariah can treat Meri, but then I remember that the pain is sharper when it's the one you love the most.  So Meri's "crime" would cut Mariah the sharpest.  Add to the fact that the other adults were possibly vilifying Meri off camera, and/or pushing it all under the carpet.  Mariah took the easier path.  Either way, she needs to put her big girl panties on and heal their relationship.  She calls herself a "kid" yet wants to be taken seriously as a medical professional.  She also needs to stop copping out by calling on immaturity, if she wants to be taken seriously in her very mature decision to come out of the closet.  Maybe she can now understand Meri's secrecy.  After all, Mariah's clearly kept secret this whole struggle and realization of who she is. 

6 hours ago, chuckity said:

Wasn't Mariah one of the (only) kids who was insistent she was going to lead a poly lifestyle herself?

Yes.  And most of us, including me, decided it was because Mariah had seen polygamy through the eyes of the first and legal wife.  She lived in relative privilege, while her siblings struggled like sardines in a can, living off of processed food.

But now I wonder if Mariah sensed that she wasn't interested in having a man to herself.  Multiple wives mean less time stuck with her husband.  I think Mariah, like most of the siblings, loved her early childhood of closeness and being surrounded by her siblings.  And Mariah knew she wanted kids.  And while children are still very much an option, it's more complicated than your average heterosexual woman married to a man.

I think the demotion of Meri took the shine off of polygamy.  And I think that Mariah's experience of accepting her sexuality is what led to her disillusion with her religion.  All versions of Mormonism require a man to pull a woman through the veil.  So Mariah realized Mormonism excluded her, unless she wanted an afterlife that rejected her lover/wife, and forced her to live as a child for eternity on her father's planet.  (This sounds so crazy to speak aloud.  It almost feels like discussing Scientology.)

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I'm still baffled why Meri can claim to be lonely when their family has staked out the entire end of the cul-de-sac.

I get so tired of the endless whining about Meri "being lonely" and "unfulfilled" and all of those bullshit excuses.

You make your own destiny.  If you are waiting for others to do it for you then you get what you deserve.  Get this:  you do not need a man to be fulfilled.  

Get your ass out of the house, meet other people, do volunteer activities, help in a soup kitchen or in a hospital, join a group that supports deployed troops, be a docent at a museum, help out at a daycare or a women's shelter, make home visits for hospice, do the hell something.  There are a million activities out there to keep you from being lonely, for God's sake.  

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