Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[GEML]

I do know that one ministry that had been opened up more recently in Nepal is supporting Baptist ministers directly. You go over and basically apprentice under one of them. They are native Nepalese, and you are expected to pay your own way and serve as sort of an assistant pastor to the congregation for free, which is why it is a longer commitment than a few weeks. Nepalese ministers live very, VERY simply, and in accordance with the families for whom they serve. If I had to guess, based on the time frame, the Baptist ties, and that he was studying while being there, this is likely the program he was doing.

[cereality]

Do we know how long Derick lived in Nepal? Regardless of whether he was passing out bibles or digging ditches -- or something in between -- it seems like he got somewhat immersed in Nepali culture. At least that was the impression I got when he took JB to go get a shave at the local barber shop and introduced Jill to a woman he had befriended who had some kind of art or clothing shop; it didn't seem like he was going to these places for the first time. It seems like he was into Nepali food too -- though I doubt there's too much of a choice on a day to day basis; I'm sure there are western restaurants in his city but maybe not in his own neighborhood. It would be interesting to hear about his life there -- though I guess there's no way to and no reason to work it into the show since it pre-dates Jill.

[Wellfleet]

The only reason why yesterday's huge Twitter gaffe was not front and center was because of the sheer amount of national and international news crowding it out. (White House Correspondent's Dinner/Nepal/Baltimore/Bruce Jenner, for starters.) He needs some (good) media training, stat.

 

One would think that Cat Gate was enough to show him this isn't all fun and games, but he's not going to learn until he says or does something so objectionable he loses his job over it, IMHO.

 

Yes indeed. If the Duggars actually do have a professional, trained publicist - something I'm inclining to doubt more and more - he or she totally dropped the ball on this one...

[RazzleberryPie]

Do we know how long Derick lived in Nepal? Regardless of whether he was passing out bibles or digging ditches -- or something in between -- it seems like he got somewhat immersed in Nepali culture. At least that was the impression I got when he took JB to go get a shave at the local barber shop and introduced Jill to a woman he had befriended who had some kind of art or clothing shop; it didn't seem like he was going to these places for the first time. It seems like he was into Nepali food too -- though I doubt there's too much of a choice on a day to day basis; I'm sure there are western restaurants in his city but maybe not in his own neighborhood. It would be interesting to hear about his life there -- though I guess there's no way to and no reason to work it into the show since it pre-dates Jill.

It appeared to me, also, that he had an appreciation of the culture and was really embracing everyday elements of Nepali life - food, ways of greeting people, barber shop socializing, clothing, etc. I was impressed with him at that time (not so much since they've gotten married).

[Sew Sumi]

Disagree. In his position as a role model for young people, it would do a world of good to set an example of good charity. I certainly would give him CREDIT for openly pledging something, likely a check, to the relief efforts. I just question the organizations he chose to ask people to donate to, one of which is the organization that sponsored his missionary work. http://imb.org/updates/storyview-3062.aspx#.VT2T6iFVikp

[RazzleberryPie]

Honestly, I would do the same thing Derrick did in suggesting donations be sent to the organization with which I were most familiar. He has the best idea of how they'd utilize funds, as compared to other, totally legit, organizations that are perfectly OK, but he just isn't familiar with.

[BitterApple]

Seriously, I can't snark on Derick for this one. What exactly is he supposed to do? If he made a big show about donating money that would be even more distasteful than sending out a simple Tweet. I get that this tragedy should hit him harder than the average person but I don't expect him to go into a depression over it either.

[3 is enough]

 

Thing is, most of us do not take off to countries like Nepal or Haiti which is still a flippin' mess despite the money donated to recovery efforts. I won't donate to international charities focused on a specific country because when I look at Haiti and the Bill Clinton machine, I can't help but wonder why more wasn't done. 

Where did the money go?

Into the pockets of corrupt officials, end of story.  This is why I do not donate money to disaster relief in corrupt 3rd world countries- it never gets to the people. My godfather worked for the UN in Rwanda in the late 80's.  He saw this first hand, and told us in no uncertain terms to keep our money.

 

Back to Derick- in this case the poor guy is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.  And even the "Trust Jesus" comment, which I admit rubbed me the wrong way, was probably just a knee-jerk reaction on his part.

[msblossom]

Derick came across like a religious ass on twitter. I don't know Derick and I have no idea if he's really that insensitive and stupid or if he's a decent guy that just made an insensitive and stupid tweet. However, I am very familiar with the mission organization that Derick was a part of for 2 years before he married Jill. I know of the team who served alongside Derick in Katmandu and a small team from my church returned from there just 2 weeks ago. In addition to sharing the gospel they do a lot of community and business development among the people of Nepal. They have a women's empowerment program that help female Nepalis and Tibetans develop their own business and they loan them money and provide resources to turn their business ideas into reality. This is a very well structured and organized group that has team members from all over the world. They love the people of Nepal and I'm sure are devastated and heartbroken over the loss of life and destruction from the earthquake. They will work hard and put together an action plan with the resources and money that is currently being donated and organize teams of volunteers who will be dispatched from the U.S. to aid and bring relief to this devastation and meet the felt needs.

[Seashell Lover]

With all the time he takes off I wonder if he took the 12 week FLMA or if he did not I bet you he will not have a job to come back to.

Edited April 27, 2015 by Seashell Lover

[JoanArc]

I thought it was odd that Derrick had time to date (with a purpose!) while on his mission.

[Happyfatchick]

My guess is that while on a mission purpose, they all have means to some down time. Luckily for the leaders of his mission, his only down time was skyping Jill with her parents sitting there on the couch listening. How WEIRD was that???? Binjerman is the one who's lucky - imagine him trying to accomplish a "real" job and keep up with Jessa at the same time.

[Foghorn Leghorn]

Back to Derick- in this case the poor guy is damned if he does and damned if he doesn't.  And even the "Trust Jesus" comment, which I admit rubbed me the wrong way, was probably just a knee-jerk reaction on his part.

 

Just because he missioned in Nepal does not make him or the Duggars personally responsible to do any more or less than anyone else.  Assigning blame to another person if you are not helping yourself is a pot kettle situation.    

[Jellybeans]

With all the time he takes off I wonder if he took the 12 week FLMA or if he did not I bet you he will not have a job to come back to.

Well, FLMA is a surprisingly strong law! He is legally entitled to it.

I am no fan of Derrick but he is entitled to bond with his son according to the law.

Edited April 27, 2015 by Jellybeans

[springtime]

In the family photo Jessa took and posted:

https://instagram.com/p/16KDEHDfp-/?taken-by=jessaseewald

 

I sure wish Jill and Derick were gazing towards Israel-  

If looks like they are watching TV!

(if it was cropped no one would even know Israel is in the photo)

Edited April 27, 2015 by springtime

[Clemgo3165]

I kind of like the composition of the photo. Shows them as a family unit, and I like the somewhat profile view she has there. It's a nice pic.

[AmyFarrahFowler]

In the family photo Jessa took and posted:

https://instagram.com/p/16KDEHDfp-/?taken-by=jessaseewald

 

I sure wish Jill and Derick were gazing towards Israel-  

If looks like they are watching TV!

(if it was cropped no one would even know Israel is in the photo)

 

This is a popular pose amongst my daughter and her friends who are about the same age. I see many groups of pics with this type of pose. Fortunately they usually never choose them to post.

[Skittl1321]

It looks like they are posing for a camera directly in front of them (and Jessa's picture is secondary).  Which makes it a nice family portrait.

Edited April 27, 2015 by Skittl1321

[birkenstock]

IDK, I give them a pass on this one. It's a candid shot rather than a staged family portrait. I think Jill may have known that it was being taken but Derick seemed focused on the TV. Maybe watching on the Nepal coverage. I think it's nice to show they're spending time together and they look really comfortable. 

Edited April 27, 2015 by Cocka doodle dont

[JoanArc]

IDK, I give them a pass on this one. It's a candid shot rather than a staged family portrait. I think Jill may have known that it was being taken but Derick seemed focused on the TV. Maybe watching on the Nepal coverage. I think it's nice to show they're spending time together and they look really comfortable. 

Well, Iz is old news in their world.

[Micks Picks]

It's so nice he is getting this time off.  It's not like he has not had time off before, but hey, bonding and Big Sandy and wherever he going in June are good preparation for his job of staying home all the time.  This is of course what Jill wants and what is modeled to him by Boob.  I'm sure Walmart shareholders are thrilled that this behavior modeled by him towards the rest of the employees ever year or so is in effect leaving them with a part time employee who likely needs a lot of retraining every time he returns to work prior to another leave.  With all this modeling going on, I'm sure he is on the fast track to promotion.  (total snark of course)

[birkenstock]

Looks like he's sleeping.  Jill's comforting him by having him in her arms, there's not much more she could do. If he was awake and the focus was off him that's a little different. I think everyone was paying plenty of attention to him since Jessa's Iz photo montage was on the same day. ETA: well not everyone - I think Michelle and Jim Bob have moved on to Jessa's soon-to-be blessing. Iz is old news to Grandparents Duggar. 

Edited April 27, 2015 by Cocka doodle dont

[HundFan]

Re the most recent family photo: Jill and Derick are not looking at their new baby because their eyes are on Jesus.

[GEML]

Do none of you have time off? I swear, if I added up the time people took talking about Derick's time off it would look like no one EVER worked!

I can make the argument that he took three weeks off last year. That's it. Which is likely how much time he had in vacation. It's after April 15th, and he might have built up some extra days through flex time. That's quite likely in accounting. I really just don't think it's that big of a deal.

[DamWrite]

In the family photo Jessa took and posted:

https://instagram.com/p/16KDEHDfp-/?taken-by=jessaseewald

 

I sure wish Jill and Derick were gazing towards Israel-  

If looks like they are watching TV!

(if it was cropped no one would even know Israel is in the photo)

They're not looking at him because they are recording a congratulatory message to Bin and Jessa on the announcement of the pregnancy.  I just saw the vid on the Dillard family blog.  (No, I don't check their blog.  My FB feed told me the Duggars had a new post - the link was to the Dillard's blog.)     

Edited April 27, 2015 by DamWrite

[Ilovemylabs]

The ugly secret is that most money from any organization (including the Red Cross) doesn't usually help the actual people living in what was often near poverty in these countries. Haiti, for instance, received billions in aid, but estimates put that less than 15% went to actual people. The worst thing Derick could do is hop on a plane. The best thing he could do is wire money to INDIVIDUALS there that he knows. But there is no way he can post that kind of information on social media.

My charity of choice is the Salvation Army...definitely NOT the Red Cross, but I'm not sure how international their reach is.  If Derick posted some church related sites to send money then that is OK with me.  I know from my own church experience (missionary-teacher in Borneo) that money collected by our church was wired directly to the local established church and was used to give aid directly to those in need. Just my opinion, of course.

[ChocolateAddict]

I enjoy snarking on Derrick as much as the next person but this is getting harsh.  

If he said nothing, he would be heartless.  If he had posted 10 tweets, he would be making it all about him.  

If he had jumped on a plane, he would be taking up room meant for aid workers.  Since he hasn't, he is being called uninvolved.  

He posts links to charities he knows, he gets criticised.  If he hadn't posted any links, he would be criticised. 

 

[snip]

 

Either way, let's just all hope that the people of Nepal can get the emergency aid that they need and can rebuild their country safely.  

Edited April 29, 2015 by Rhondinella
missonary convo

[CofCinci]

Jill is still wearing that personalized sweat band around her forehead? yick.

[leighdear]

It's my opinion that the Walmart corporation gets a lot out of having an employee with the visibility of Derrick.  And a corporation of that size has accounting systems and processes that are strictly regimented.  Employees don't have to be constantly re-trained.  Even small changes in their systems can cost millions of dollars to implement, so changes aren't often made. 

 

And employment contracts, even with large entities, can often be negotiated.  Even with my small company, I negotiated that I only work 1/2 days on Fridays.  Derrick could have negotiated several employment "gaps" throughout the year as part of his contract. 

[JoanArc]

 

My god, these people can't do anything right can they?

 

http://radaronline.com/exclusives/2015/04/jill-duggar-wears-baby-sling-incorrectly/

 

Meh, there might be some downsides in whoring every second of your life out. This is one of them. I'd honestly have more respect if they told critics to straight up F off, instead of passive-aggressively responding weeks later.

[DangerousMinds]

No way in hell was that a "candid" photo." LMAO.

[NikSac]

I'm with you Pooop, seems like they can't do anything right. I'm all for snarking but good lord... it's like they can't even sneeze without it being wrong somehow. They certainly can't handle Nepal the "right" way or take care of their baby the "right" way. Being on camera all the time doesn't help. I mostly blame JB and Michelle because Jill was certainly too young to decide to live her entire life on camera at the time when she started filming, but I wish she and Derick would decide to drop the cameras now.

[frenchtoast]

A reminder folks, that we're here to snark on the Duggars and not attack each other.

[Apple Clark]

In the family photo Jessa took and posted:

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Jill is wearing that ridiculous headband again.... It's cute except for the fact that her name is on the side, like she's a toddler or something.

[HeyNow]

Jill is wearing that ridiculous headband again.... It's cute except for the fact that her name is on the side, like she's a toddler or something.

Yeahhhhhh.... it's getting a little  "fame! remember, remember, remember my name! fame!"

[SomePity1066]

Yeahhhhhh.... it's getting a little  "fame! remember, remember, remember my name! fame!"

Awww, Jeez ! Now I have that song in my head. Forever...     I'm gonna lean how to fly...   HIGH !!!

 

Seriously, though - she looks like a toddler, as Apple Clark said. Like a Stepford Wife with a fresh lobotomy. 

 

Truth be told, I LOVE stuff with my name on it (or my doggie's, or my SO's...) but the headband is just a little much for me. As for the style of the picture I'm kind of "meh" - the "gazing off into the distance in an affected, artsy way" is a bit too much. I get what they were going for but to pass it off as a spontaneous snapshot is just disingenuous. 

[Wowzer]

She does look like a toddler or like she went to camp and personalized headbands were a team gift.

At least she'll never have to share the headband with her sisters. No more communal closet for Jilly! Strange thing is that both Jill and Jessa have worn the black and white chevron maxi skirt. Do they each have one, sharing during the conference or is there a marrieds communal closet? Doesn't really matter- they just love matching!

[Fuzzysox]

Is that skirt the only thing Jill owns? She wears it almost everyday.

[3 is enough]

 

Is that skirt the only thing Jill owns? She wears it almost everyday.

Meh, it's probably her version of yoga pants- comfy and her "go to" garment.  I imagine a lot of her clothes are still tight and uncomfortable on her incision area, and since she is still in the shrinking belly stage she probably doesn't want to go shopping for new stuff.  I give her a pass on this one, even though, IMO, it is a fugly skirt.

Edited April 28, 2015 by 3 is enough

[CarolMK]

Since Derrick and Jill are married now and living on their own, I'm sure that it's their choice as to whether or not they want to participate in the tv show. However, we haven't yet seen any signs that they want to be out of the public eye..it's quite the opposite. They are very invested in keeping the reality show, fame, and money flowing from it as well as the proceeds from People magazine and public appearances. I'm sure Jim Bob knew only approved of men who would agree to participate in the show as suitors for his daughters. Anyone who inquired and might have even hinted at a private life was probably shown the door promptly. 

[Fuzzysox]

I saw that skirt at Walmart and they are really a cheap material and they came in different colors. I think they were $8-$11. She has yet to get rid of her mustard colored sweater. blah! She is too young to become like her mom and wear overly frumpy clothes. That light purple top she wore over a black t-shirt and her stripped skirt----doesn't do anything for her.

 

So what I'm trying to say is that she doesn't seem to take or give herself anytime to find clothes that would make her look her age. Frumpy does not equal Godly. JMHO signed, wanna be Stacy London. lol

[Clemgo3165]

Since Derrick and Jill are married now and living on their own, I'm sure that it's their choice as to whether or not they want to participate in the tv show. However, we haven't yet seen any signs that they want to be out of the public eye..it's quite the opposite. They are very invested in keeping the reality show, fame, and money flowing from it as well as the proceeds from People magazine and public appearances. I'm sure Jim Bob knew only approved of men who would agree to participate in the show as suitors for his daughters. Anyone who inquired and might have even hinted at a private life was probably shown the door promptly. 

 

Maybe, but probably not. For of JB's faults, I think he really does care about his children and would want a match based on compatibility and the "godliness" of the intended. If I were in the position Jill and Derick are in, I'd be milking for all it's worth. You never know when the gravy train is gonna leave the station and the money they take in now can set them up for the rest of their lives - and provide an education for their kids if Derick is serious about Iz being the next Pistol Pete.

[leighdear]

 

Since Derrick and Jill are married now and living on their own, I'm sure that it's their choice as to whether or not they want to participate in the tv show.

Very true, to the extent of their legal contracts to TLC.  We have no way of knowing if their participation has an ending date.  They could be cheerfully doing their dog-and-Izzie show until time to renew their contracts.  I'm assuming that each married couple has their own contracts, but we have no way of knowing that or any specific details. 

 

Hell, there could be a corporation called "TTH International" that legally employs all of them, for financial reasons.  But until somebody spills the beans, nobody outside has any idea of how long any of them are contracted to the show, and in what capacity.  

[dillpickles]

Very true, to the extent of their legal contracts to TLC. We have no way of knowing if their participation has an ending date. They could be cheerfully doing their dog-and-Izzie show until time to renew their contracts. I'm assuming that each married couple has their own contracts, but we have no way of knowing that or any specific details.

Hell, there could be a corporation called "TTH International" that legally employs all of them, for financial reasons. But until somebody spills the beans, nobody outside has any idea of how long any of them are contracted to the show, and in what capacity.

They're all signed for the rest of their lives! No one leaves Jim Bob's Magical Ministry Show. No one, ever. Once you go Jim Bob, you never go back.

[trimthatfat]

I'm sure the contract with TLC is lengthy. I doubt Jill and Derick can afford to buy themselves out of the length of the contract.

[Zahdii]

[snip]

 

As for Jill wearing the same clothing when heavily pregnant, and continuing after giving birth...Well, from my own experiences, I had very few clothes that I could wear at the end, and I continued wearing those same clothes weeks after I gave birth because they were both familiar and comfortable, and because nothing else fit right away.  If anyone was annoyed that I only wore the same few outfits for the last few months of my pregnancies, and didn't immediately change back to pre pregnancy clothes, they didn't say anything in front of me.  Good thing, because after I got through crying or raging, my next instinct would be to tell them to buy me a new wardrobe.  I doubt if I'd actually bothered, because for me, having a newborn is too blasted tiring to go shopping and trying on clothes.

 

As for Derick and the earthquake in Nepal, he phoned it in ititially by just saying to pray.  But I never expected him to go there personally and try to help, because Nepal needs experienced people there and not untrained people just trying to help (or just wandering around praying - pretty sure there's a lot of praying already going on there).  Nepal doesn't need people clogging up their damaged airport just so they can wander around with a film crew so they can say they were there. 

 

Derick then followed up by listing charities that he endorsed.  If anyone doesn't like those charities, they don't have to contribute to them.  I certainly won't, after hearing the stories about the so-called charities that sprung up after the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina and the Haiti earthquake.  When I contribute money, I want to know where it's going.

 

With all that said, it seems that the new baby is seen as a photo op for the Duggars, and more as welcoming a new family member for Dericks family.  I don't frequent their facebook pages, or any of their other social media, but if I did I'd focus on the positives of Dericks family only being excited about the new baby and how he has been welcomed into the world and how much they love him and his parents.

Edited April 29, 2015 by Rhondinella
missionary convo

[leighdear]

If Jill signed a separate 5-year contract on her 18th birthday, it would come up for renewal on May 17th, her birthday this year.  Or maybe she signed a new contract when she married Derrick.  Or maybe she has a 10-year contract.  Maybe their contracts are open-ended and they can pull the plug at any time, or for specific reasons.  She may have trust accounts that kick in at 25 or 30.  

 

There is simply no way to know how their contracts are structured and how much money any of them have.  I'm aware that some people believe that Jim Bob is in sole control of every dime, but there's no proof that he acts financially for all of his adult children.  

 

All it would take is one malfunctioning hair spray can......

[Skittl1321]

I had to go look up the baby's name. Every time I see Izzy, I think Isabel. And I knew they didn't have a girl.  I COULD NOT remember the name at all.  Apparently they haven't had enough exposure ;)

[Happyfatchick]

I never even considered the communal wardrobe until the comment above. Imagine that: they actually had to have some conversation about what they would take and what they would leave - and Jinger and Jana are still there! I'm thinking the communal closet probably seemed like a better idea before they started leaving home and SOMEBODY took all the underwear!!!

[Rhondinella]

Ok guys, I'm back.  I have gone through and deleted or snipped the posts on the contentious missionary topic.  What FT said in her mod post (which, AHEM, a number of people did not adhere to) is absolutely correct and should put an end to any discussion on that topic here.  If you MUST talk about what missionaries do, go to the Religion thread.  But I'll be keeping a close eye on that as well.

 

So . . . from here forward NO posting your opinions on what Derrick did or didn't do as a missionary or what missionaries do or don't do in general.  And CERTAINLY nothing more along the lines of "all missionaries are evil imperalists." As I tell my students, any statement that contains the words, "all," "always," "never," and "none" is most often a vast over generalization.  The real world is not that neat and tidy.

 

I will start handing out warnings and possible suspensions for those who can't let it go.  Thanks.