Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[SMama]

14 minutes ago, floridamom said:

This just seems to be a classless thing to do. 

In other words right on brand for a Duggar.

[ozziemom]

I’m hoping that Derick decided not to push public school since there were so many changes at once for Jill. New baby, new house and new schedule for Derick which limits his time at home. Maybe next fall after things are more settled the boys will go to public school. There will be no Pistol Pete #3 if homeschooling continues. Jill also needs to find a friend in her neighborhood, seems like there was one back at the other house.

[ChristmasCandy]

6 hours ago, floridamom said:

 

 

I can't imagine hauling a crock pot/plates/utensils/napkins/beverages through the DA's office to have dinner with Derrick. This just seems to be a classless thing to do. 

Well do any of the Duggars know what class is?

[MaryAnneSpier]

I don't know much about the world of practicing law, but I would think they have a break room. I often think Jill is too needy, but if she goes to Derrick's work just once or twice a month to have supper together when he's working late, I don't have a problem with that. It may be the only time the family gets to spend together. If, however, she's doing it frequently and overstaying her welcome and the kids are running wild, that's a different story.  

[libgirl2]

19 minutes ago, MaryAnneSpier said:

I don't know much about the world of practicing law, but I would think they have a break room. I often think Jill is too needy, but if she goes to Derrick's work just once or twice a month to have supper together when he's working late, I don't have a problem with that. It may be the only time the family gets to spend together. If, however, she's doing it frequently and overstaying her welcome and the kids are running wild, that's a different story.  

I agree, if it is once or twice a month, that is fine, but this is Jill, it is probably much more often than that. 

[Salacious Kitty]

19 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

I agree, if it is once or twice a month, that is fine, but this is Jill, it is probably much more often than that. 

And if she's homeschooling, she doesn't have to worry about keeping the kids up past their bedtimes. Because an hour of this venture is spent driving. 

[floridamom]

Unless Derrick is as unorganized as Jill, there is no need for him to continually stay late at the office. If, on occasion he does need to, there is no reason why Jill and the boys can't sit down and have dinner together and she can keep a plate warm for Derrick when he arrives home. He is not running the country; he's a misdemeanor assistant prosecutor in an Oklahoma county. He has to start somewhere and this is the level in which they start. He may have a high caseload but these types of offenses usually plead out. No need to "prepare for trial" on most of them. This has been my experience in the past. Sorry, I forgot to include that Jill needs to tend to sweet Fenna also in her daily chores.

[babyhouseman]

On 1/11/2023 at 4:25 PM, floridamom said:

I can't imagine hauling a crock pot/plates/utensils/napkins/beverages through the DA's office to have dinner with Derrick.

If true, I wonder what the other coworkers think, I would think, "Here comes the Beverly Hillbilly with the picnic lunch". 

[Absolom]

I doubt there are any co-workers around the office when Jill comes by.  Isn't this a tiny county office with maybe three attorneys in it?

[LilJen]

 

On 1/11/2023 at 9:34 AM, floridamom said:

I don't think the prosecutor's office would like it very much that Derrick's wife is having dinner with him at the office. There is a lot of sensitive material in the office that Jill is not privy to. When my husband started out in the DA's office, I SELDOM was there.

“Don’t worry, boss. She barely knows how to read.”

On 1/11/2023 at 12:58 PM, SMama said:

I would not be surprised if parents with two kids carpool. One parent takes their kid and others to one school and vice versa. Derick should take his role as headship seriously and stop indulging Jill's neediness.

A friend and I were discussing the lost art of carpooling the other day. My sisters and I did it all the time with other families, and it seemed ridiculous to do otherwise. Maybe our society is just that much more isolated and individualistic since the 1970s 🙁

[crazy8s]

41 minutes ago, LilJen said:

A friend and I were discussing the lost art of carpooling the other day. My sisters and I did it all the time with other families, and it seemed ridiculous to do otherwise. Maybe our society is just that much more isolated and individualistic since the 1970s 🙁

One of the big differences in carpooling since the 1970s is the need for child safety seats. The moving them from car to car and having enough for each kid is a big deterrent. Long gone are the days of pulling into a driveway and having a couple extra kids hop in whatever car.

For my son to drive one or two extra kids to basketball or whatever would mean he would have to remove their own infant seat and toddler seat to have room. The hassle isn't worth it.

Edited January 13, 2023 by crazy8s

[Minivanessa]

On 1/12/2023 at 5:24 PM, Absolom said:

I doubt there are any co-workers around the office when Jill comes by.  Isn't this a tiny county office with maybe three attorneys in it?

Yes. I looked it up back when Derick was landing there. IIRC it's located in in a suite in the Adair County Courthouse in Stilwell. I can't find current info online about the office's staffing; a 3 year old web page shows what looks like four full time attorneys + a lawyer in private practice who provides some services. I looked up those listed attorneys and AFAIK none are still there. One has moved on to be an Assistant US Attorney, which is a big step up professionally (and financially). One of the attorney positions was devoted to child support enforcement, not criminal prosecutions, for Adair and another county.

Adair County is one of four counties in the District Attorney's district. Adair County's population is about 22,000, and it's not the main office for that DA's district. That office is in Wagoner. 

I don't see Jill and the kids taking dinner to Derick as a big deal. I'm sure he's not working a heavy felony caseload, but he may have an occasional evening meeting or something like that. 

Edited January 16, 2023 by Jeeves
Clarity about population #

[floridamom]

I watched Joy's "sister" YouTube which included Jana's birthday lunch. Her birthday this year was on a weekday and I noticed Izzy and Sam seated at the table with the ladies. Sadly, I think this is our confirmation that those boys are not attending school this year. I truly hope Jill and Derick re-consider this decision.

[Madtown]

Freddy started swim lessons. Jill said that Izzy and Sam were at thier lessons too. She had an insta story and there was a brief spot in the video where Freddie turns his head a little. I think he looks like Sam from what I saw.

As far as homeschooling. I don't ever trust any of these people when they post videos. I think they post videos from a weekend on a weekday, just to stir the pot.

Edited January 17, 2023 by Madtown

[SMama]

Too bad Jessa doesn’t want to bother taking her kids to swim lessons. I’m sure Goldfish would make her a partner. It would be nice for the Feral Seewalds to do something fun, and also a life saving skill. Instead, Jessa is chilling Snuggle Me using Fern who is almost a year past the age to use the product.

Good for Jill and Derick to get Freddy started so early. I loved mommy and me swim lessons. SBaby was and still is a water baby. 

[ScorpioSoul]

Since Derrick was there, I am assuming it was on a weekend. In regards to school, I do think that neither of the older boys are in school. She has had multiple instances to clarify that they are in school. She can post photos or mention school with out posting what school they are in. I do hope like another poster stated that D agreed to take this year off with the move, the new job, and new baby all at once. I do hope they can get back to school next year even if it is a Christian school.

Edited January 17, 2023 by ScorpioSoul

[SMama]

16 minutes ago, ScorpioSoul said:

I do hope they can get back to school next year even if it is a Christian school.

I don’t think Derick makes enough to afford private school tuition for two kids. Although it would be nice. Like you I really hope this is for this school year to give Jill time to acclimate to so many changes. 

[Salacious Kitty]

The boys were at Jana's daytime birthday party last week. Her birthday was on a weekday, and Derick obviously wasn't around to watch them. By contrast, Joy only brought Evy. Jessa was there, but I didn't see any of her kids.

[Absolom]

2 hours ago, Madtown said:

As far as homeschooling. I don't ever trust any of these people when they post videos. I think they post videos from a weekend on a weekday, just to stir the pot.

For sure and in this case there is Derick in the pool.  He doesn't have enough time on the job to be taking off work for swimming lessons.  

[Panopticon]

3 hours ago, SMama said:

I don’t think Derick makes enough to afford private school tuition for two kids. Although it would be nice. Like you I really hope this is for this school year to give Jill time to acclimate to so many changes. 

Maybe Jill and Derick can get their grift on to get tuition money for the kids? They’re not inexperienced in the art of getting stuff for free, even if they’re generally less successful than Team Vuolo. 

[sagittarius sue]

6 minutes ago, Panopticon said:

Maybe Jill and Derick can get their grift on to get tuition money for the kids? They’re not inexperienced in the art of getting stuff for free, even if they’re generally less successful than Team Vuolo. 

As he's now a county employee, I don't think it would be a good look for him to be grifting.  I'm not denying grifting happens in governmental work, but I don't think he'd want to endanger his career.

[Lady Jane]

On 1/12/2023 at 9:24 AM, MaryAnneSpier said:

I don't know much about the world of practicing law, but I would think they have a break room. I often think Jill is too needy, but if she goes to Derrick's work just once or twice a month to have supper together when he's working late, I don't have a problem with that. It may be the only time the family gets to spend together. If, however, she's doing it frequently and overstaying her welcome and the kids are running wild, that's a different story.  

In 25 years of practice, I've never seen a spouse come to the office for a meal. I've seen spouses drop off take-out (before UberEats etc) but not ever in the office. "These days" there's less than absolutely no reason to work late, unless you prefer the solitude of an empty office. Everything is online, all files and filings are digital, etc. I am going to be generous and assume that the "office" space in their home is where Derwood works if he has to work late. I would absolutely side-eye a spouse having a meal in the break room or the attorney's office. (No shade meant to you at all @MaryAnneSpier, 100% at J&D!) Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen a lawyer eat in the break room, either. If you're working late and eating, you're at your desk multitasking so you can actually go home eventually. Whole thing is peculiar to me.

ETA: He's practicing in OK, right? As of Nov 2022 ADA salary in OK was $60,417. It is set by statute. Just for figurin' purposes for all you mathers out there

Edited January 18, 2023 by Lady Jane
I forget stuff

[Lady Whistleup]

I find the Duggar habit of visiting their husbands at work so weird. Work is usually a space where people can have a separate existence from their spouses. I remember the videos of Joy visiting Austin at the construction sites and Austin looking less than thrilled and barely paying attention to Joy.

It all goes back to the lack of structure and work ethic of the Duggars. They don't get that work is a space for ... work. 

[jcbrown]

55 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

It all goes back to the lack of structure and work ethic of the Duggars. They don't get that work is a space for ... work. 

I think it is both of those things, for sure. I think it is also because they are taught that the marriage is primary above everything else. They did not have an example of how to make that work sine Boob didn't have a real job, so Jill is applying it the way she thinks is right and hanging off DeerTick like a barnacle. She's gotten better, for sure, but she would drive me right up the wall for that reason among others.

[sagittarius sue]

10 hours ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I find the Duggar habit of visiting their husbands at work so weird. Work is usually a space where people can have a separate existence from their spouses. I remember the videos of Joy visiting Austin at the construction sites and Austin looking less than thrilled and barely paying attention to Joy.

It all goes back to the lack of structure and work ethic of the Duggars. They don't get that work is a space for ... work. 

They don't understand the boundaries that "normal" people live and work under.

[Tasya]

Tuition at a private Christian school that is not a top tier (DC area, think St. Albans, Georgetown Visitation etc.) around here can be as low as 5k per child, with sibling discounts. So I can imagine that a school in Arkansas is going to cost much less than that. They can certainly afford private school, and they would also potentially qualify for financial aid. I make close to 6 figures and my son will be attending private school next year and we are receiving aid, so Derrick and Jill would definitely qualify. 

[GeeGolly]

The closest private Christian school to the Dillards costs over $9000 a year for K - 5 and $10,000 a year for high school.

[Lady Whistleup]

Jill showed her, the three boys, and Fenna going for a walk in the middle of the day. It makes me so sad to see Izzy pulled out of school.

[ginger90]

I don’t mean to harp on this, but we don’t know the school situation. I recall Duggars posting pictures on the day of a wedding that were to suggest the wedding wasn’t that day, but it was, and the pictures weren’t actually taken that day. Just an example.

Edited January 18, 2023 by ginger90

[Zella]

1 hour ago, ginger90 said:

I don’t mean to harp on this, but we don’t know the school situation. I recall Duggars posting pictures on the day of a wedding that were to suggest the wedding wasn’t that day, but it was, and the pictures weren’t actually taken that day. Just an example.

I agree the picture timing doesn't necessary say anything. But Jill refusing to answer questions about it says everything, IMO. 

[SMama]

17 minutes ago, Zella said:

I agree the picture timing doesn't necessary say anything. But Jill refusing to answer questions about it says everything, IMO. 

If Izzy was in school he would have completed a semester. Jill posted about school, projects, and reading awards (including a picture of Izzy eating the personal pizza he got as a reward). No way would Jill miss sharing those moments. Like @Zellanoted the question dodging makes it more than likely that Izzy and Sam are homeschooled. 

[Salacious Kitty]

Also, Jill and DWreck are inseparable over the weekends. Jill alone with all the kids during the day (he gets home long after sundown) is another tell, IMO.

[Lady Whistleup]

Also she was getting a lot of engagement with the school pix. Likes, comments, follows. If it was still happening, she’d be posting about it bc it was so popular. 

[YupItsMe]

Maybe she’s gotten a bit more savvy and knows that if she says they are in school, fanatical people will figure out what school. Of course, if they aren’t in school, I’m sure some people have already figured out where the house is so the boys aren’t really any safer there than they would be at school - probably less so.

[ginger90]

[Absolom]

Instead of just dumping the dog outside with snow covered ground, how about taking her on a walk on cleared sidewalks?  Or engage her in something so she forgets about the snow or gets used to walking on it?

[sagittarius sue]

14 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Instead of just dumping the dog outside with snow covered ground, how about taking her on a walk on cleared sidewalks?  Or engage her in something so she forgets about the snow or gets used to walking on it?

She probably wanted to play so it would've been far better if she and/or the kids went outside to play with her.

Edited January 25, 2023 by sagittarius sue

[libgirl2]

2 minutes ago, sagittarius sue said:

She probably wanted to play so it would've been far better if she and/or the kids went outside to play with her.

Sometimes animals need to run around and get their "play" done. Walks are usually more sedate. I have a cat and after he eats, he gets a play time. 

[Absolom]

7 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

Sometimes animals need to run around and get their "play" done. Walks are usually more sedate. I have a cat and after he eats, he gets a play time. 

True, but basically doing any activity with the dog is better than leaving her sitting in the dirt.

[GeeGolly]

Jill seems to only see Fenna from a nuisance perspective and never from a dog perspective.

What makes Jill thing Fenna needs to "get some energy out"? Barking in the garage and scratching at the door?

In the slides following the picture of Fenna, Jill and Derick are outside, hanging by the fire, drinking coffee and Fenna is nowhere in sight.

[SMama]

11 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Jill seems to only see Fenna from a nuisance perspective and never from a dog perspective.

What makes Jill thing Fenna needs to "get some energy out"? Barking in the garage and scratching at the door?

In the slides following the picture of Fenna, Jill and Derick are outside, hanging by the fire, drinking coffee and Fenna is nowhere in sight.

Fenna and the kids are a nuisance to Jill and Derick. The boys were inside and she was communicating with them via walkie-talkie. They could have dressed them for the weather and let them enjoy that first snow.

I think it was Israel who was hungry, Jill told him to finish his breakfast, he had, she told him to get cheese cubes. Children need to be self sufficient but Jill strikes me as just not that invested, puts very little parenting effort. Definitely JB’s and Michelle’s daughter. 

[Gemma Violet]

I don't fret about it.  Fenna probably gets lots of playtime with the kids.  It's nice that she's mostly inside during the cold weather (and she looks healthy and well fed).  To me, it shows that the Dillards are doing a good job with her.  She could be chained up in the backyard through all kinds of weather like some horror stories I've heard.

[BetyBee]

Someone must be outside with Fenna, at least to take the picture! 

[ginger90]

[jacourt]

Jill took a picture of the dog and had to put a caption. These things either have to be over the top happy and great or miserable. To me she looks like a dog who doesn’t want to get their paws wet. 

[ginger90]

[libgirl2]

24 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

I remember making at least one snowman that looked like that. We were so excited to be out there playing that it was a snow/mudman

[SMama]

I really like the snowman. That’s not a snowman for the Gram, it’s about two kids excited about the first snow of the season and its scarceness did not put a damp on their enthusiasm. Good for Derick for joining the fun. 

[CalicoKitty]

I wish someone would make snowmen in all the snow on my lawn.  I still have at least a foot on the ground, with a 5 foot pile from the snow plow next to my driveway.  More snow this weekend....

It looks like the boys had fun making their snowman.  I used to love playing in the snow when I was at my aunt's house.

[auntieminem]

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Jill seems to only see Fenna from a nuisance perspective and never from a dog perspective.

What makes Jill thing Fenna needs to "get some energy out"? Barking in the garage and scratching at the door?

In the slides following the picture of Fenna, Jill and Derick are outside, hanging by the fire, drinking coffee and Fenna is nowhere in sight.

You can see Fenna  in the yard in the picture of them by the fire. That picture and caption is like many of my friends posted of their dogs as funny, either the dogs were so happy to get out in the snow or they were giving the no thanks look.  I think the they are fond of Fenna and though they probably make many mistakes she seems to be doing well. She was and hopefully still is Derick's running buddy. When they first got her I was afraid they would end up not keeping her because Duggars don't have a great pet record. Though maybe I should not paint them all the same, seems like Jana has had the same dog for a some time.