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Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)


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Steve Maxwell has been doing a serious articles about Building  A Godly Legacy. The first two were about making sure your kids loved Jesus and God. 

Part 3 was more about marriage.

"God established authority structures on earth and in marriage has given husbands the higher authority as exemplified in Ephesians 5:22-24 and 6:4. Husbands and wives are a team, but Dad leads the team because God has placed him in that role. Therefore, we will answer to God for what we did with the authority He entrusted to us.

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing” (Ephesians 5:22-24)." " 

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3 hours ago, Temperance said:

Steve Maxwell has been doing a serious articles about Building  A Godly Legacy. The first two were about making sure your kids loved Jesus and God. 

Part 3 was more about marriage.

"God established authority structures on earth and in marriage has given husbands the higher authority as exemplified in Ephesians 5:22-24 and 6:4. Husbands and wives are a team, but Dad leads the team because God has placed him in that role. Therefore, we will answer to God for what we did with the authority He entrusted to us.

“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing” (Ephesians 5:22-24)." " 

I love how they always conveniently leave out the part where husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her which is Ephesians 5:25. Or Colossians 3:19 Husbands love your wives and do not be harsh with them. 

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3 hours ago, Snow Fairy said:

What can Nathan preach about? What life experiences did he have? Is he in touch with the real world?

Is any of them?

I think he prob. just parrots what he's heard.Like when he said prayer is the work,not prep. for it.Prob. what his dad says in his ministry.And Nurie just gushes over it,like he's a genius 

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I am so curious what happens with Nurie once she is married. Does she serve Nathan a David-sized plate of food, a regular-sized plate of food, or a Rodlet-sized plate of food? What size servings does she give herself? I envision Nathan quietly calling his mama for advice on how to help Nurie. Will Ma Keller take Nurie under her wing?

HOLD THE PHONE. I just realized neither Nathan nor Nurie got social media upon their engagement. When will they join instagram to show us all the godly and goofy things they are up to?

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I listened to a little bit of Nathan's preaching and it wasn't horrible.   What I heard was him speaking about  looking to God instead of following the example of friends.  Not to lose your way by trying to be like other people that we look up to who pull away from God and Christian values.  Nothing earth shattering.  

 

He's a better speaker than I expected.

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3 hours ago, andromeda331 said:

I love how they always conveniently leave out the part where husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her which is Ephesians 5:25. Or Colossians 3:19 Husbands love your wives and do not be harsh with them. 

And don't make them give up Pepsi if they enjoy it. 

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It just occurred to me that these kids (particularly Timothy, Nurie, Kaylee, and Renee) have no access to social media at all and my not know about how certain Duggars (particularly Jill and Jinger) or Bates have started to move away from their parents' dictums and forged their own paths.  Even within the Keller family, they have children that have moved completely away from fundie-ism and are not shunned.

A whole new world is opening up for her--Mama Jill has no idea. My prediction is that within 6 months, Timothy will move to Florida to join the Keller Brothers landscaping business.

I only hope Nathan is as nice and hard-working as he seems and they plot to get the not-Nurie's to Florida, one at time. Then they all plot to keep Shrek and his handmaiden in Ohio.

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(edited)
22 minutes ago, Insert Username said:

It just occurred to me that these kids (particularly Timothy, Nurie, Kaylee, and Renee) have no access to social media at all and my not know about how certain Duggars (particularly Jill and Jinger) or Bates have started to move away from their parents' dictums and forged their own paths.  Even within the Keller family, they have children that have moved completely away from fundie-ism and are not shunned.

A whole new world is opening up for her--Mama Jill has no idea. My prediction is that within 6 months, Timothy will move to Florida to join the Keller Brothers landscaping business.

I only hope Nathan is as nice and hard-working as he seems and they plot to get the not-Nurie's to Florida, one at time. Then they all plot to keep Shrek and his handmaiden in Ohio.

Can you imagine Jill's head exploding if Satan attacks her through her perfect son-in-law? I can't see all of this happening, but it wouldn't take much to set off Jill. 

Edited by BradandJanet
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12 minutes ago, drafan said:

Yup, those Kellers sure are fabulous.....Pa Keller brokered a deal to sell his daughter off to a child molester.

I don't think JB was completely honest with Pa Keller about Josh.  I think he spun the story so Pa Keller thought Josh was just looking at porn and the only body Josh was exploring was his own.  

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10 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I don't think JB was completely honest with Pa Keller about Josh.  I think he spun the story so Pa Keller thought Josh was just looking at porn and the only body Josh was exploring was his own.  

🤮🤮🤮 @ Josh’s body 

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1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I don't think JB was completely honest with Pa Keller about Josh.  I think he spun the story so Pa Keller thought Josh was just looking at porn and the only body Josh was exploring was his own.  

I agree, but it's not like the family did anything to protect Anna and the kids after it came out. Her siblings that got out tried but I'm pretty sure her parents were fully on the 'you best stay with him or else' train.

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1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I don't think JB was completely honest with Pa Keller about Josh.  I think he spun the story so Pa Keller thought Josh was just looking at porn and the only body Josh was exploring was his own.  

I can see that happening. 

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8 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I am so curious what happens with Nurie once she is married. Does she serve Nathan a David-sized plate of food, a regular-sized plate of food, or a Rodlet-sized plate of food? What size servings does she give herself? I envision Nathan quietly calling his mama for advice on how to help Nurie. Will Ma Keller take Nurie under her wing?

HOLD THE PHONE. I just realized neither Nathan nor Nurie got social media upon their engagement. When will they join instagram to show us all the godly and goofy things they are up to?

I can see Nurie serving Nathan a heaping sized plate of food,like her dad eats.Then only taking a few small portions for herself,like she's been taught.Can't be overweight for her man,even if he gets that way

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On 6/9/2020 at 6:44 PM, Sew Sumi said:

A pic from Nurie's shower. Poor mismatched ragamuffins. 

 

I just want to take those little girls to Target and buy them some nice soft cotton clothes that fit.  If they have to have dresses, fine, but give them something they can comfortably wear.  Lands End also has cute tunic tops and leggings or cartwheel skirts for summer that would so much easier to wear than these horrible clothes.  Would also love to give Nurie and the Nots gift cards to go buy some up to date clothes - can even still be modest.  Of course Pill would probably grab the gift cards to replenish her own wardrobe.

I find leggings/yoga pants In the girls department at Walmart for my tall very slim teenage daughter that are under 4.00 a pair and they actually last forever.  I can’t believe Pill and Shrek can’t drag themselves into the girls’ section at Walmart and pick up some very inexpensive cute clothes for their girls.  They can get by without a ton of clothes but at least get something in softer fabrics in the right sizes.

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22 minutes ago, Tigregirl said:

I just want to take those little girls to Target and buy them some nice soft cotton clothes that fit.  If they have to have dresses, fine, but give them something they can comfortably wear.  Lands End also has cute tunic tops and leggings or cartwheel skirts for summer that would so much easier to wear than these horrible clothes.  Would also love to give Nurie and the Nots gift cards to go buy some up to date clothes - can even still be modest.  Of course Pill would probably grab the gift cards to replenish her own wardrobe.

I find leggings/yoga pants In the girls department at Walmart for my tall very slim teenage daughter that are under 4.00 a pair and they actually last forever.  I can’t believe Pill and Shrek can’t drag themselves into the girls’ section at Walmart and pick up some very inexpensive cute clothes for their girls.  They can get by without a ton of clothes but at least get something in softer fabrics in the right sizes.

Interesting too, that JRod's sons are always neatly dressed in pants and shirts that actually fit them.  You don't see her boys in shirts that are 8 sizes too big or wearing pants that are too short or drag on the ground.  She might make them button their shirt up under their chin, but they have clothes that fit properly.

Even if Jill won't let them wear dresses that don't hit mid-calf, there are plenty of dresses that length for kids and teens.  Kid's dresses at Walmart and Target are virtually all less than 20 bucks.  And, if she insists they cannot have bare arms. there are a gazillion kids tees there and at Old Navy that cost less than 5 bucks each.  Put a cute, colored coordinated tee OVER a sleeveless dress and make sure both items fit.  It ain't that hard.  Jill already has 2 daughters who are fully grown.  She should have more than enough girls' clothing on hand in every size that she could outfit every one of those girls in cute stuff that fits if she only went to a discount store and spent maybe $30 apiece tops on each girl to give them choices that fit and are comfortable and attractive.

Looking at the clothing, hair and makeup Jill forces on her daughters, it is almost as if she doesn't want them to outshine her.  Notice Jill is never wearing mismatched clothes that don't fit.

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Allison Bontrager's wedding will August 15 in Iowa. I think on her family's farm. If I remember correctly her brothers' triple wedding weekend was also on the farm in Iowa.  She has some registry stuff and a timeline of their relationship on the wedding site so far:

Heard about each other: December 2018

Met: May 2019

First Date: September 2019

Engaged: May 2020

Wedding: August 2020

They didn't announce the engagement until June 1. She has 65 days to go and she's probably on the singing tour with her family. Speaking of family, they have a huge family only wedding party. Chelsy is the matron of honor. Chelsy is still going to have a baby any minute, but seems to still be pregnant. 

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10 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I am so curious what happens with Nurie once she is married. Does she serve Nathan a David-sized plate of food, a regular-sized plate of food, or a Rodlet-sized plate of food? What size servings does she give herself? I envision Nathan quietly calling his mama for advice on how to help Nurie. Will Ma Keller take Nurie under her wing?

HOLD THE PHONE. I just realized neither Nathan nor Nurie got social media upon their engagement. When will they join instagram to show us all the godly and goofy things they are up to?

Maybe "Nathan" will write glowing  reports about married life and his wonderfull mama-in-law  on Jill's social media accounts .

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10 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I am so curious what happens with Nurie once she is married. Does she serve Nathan a David-sized plate of food, a regular-sized plate of food, or a Rodlet-sized plate of food? What size servings does she give herself? I envision Nathan quietly calling his mama for advice on how to help Nurie. Will Ma Keller take Nurie under her wing?

I wonder if Nurie knows how to cook.  We've all seen Jill's Easter ham so I don't think she's all that good a cook to start with.

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15 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Interesting too, that JRod's sons are always neatly dressed in pants and shirts that actually fit them.  You don't see her boys in shirts that are 8 sizes too big or wearing pants that are too short or drag on the ground.  She might make them button their shirt up under their chin, but they have clothes that fit properly.

Even if Jill won't let them wear dresses that don't hit mid-calf, there are plenty of dresses that length for kids and teens.  Kid's dresses at Walmart and Target are virtually all less than 20 bucks.  And, if she insists they cannot have bare arms. there are a gazillion kids tees there and at Old Navy that cost less than 5 bucks each.  Put a cute, colored coordinated tee OVER a sleeveless dress and make sure both items fit.  It ain't that hard.  Jill already has 2 daughters who are fully grown.  She should have more than enough girls' clothing on hand in every size that she could outfit every one of those girls in cute stuff that fits if she only went to a discount store and spent maybe $30 apiece tops on each girl to give them choices that fit and are comfortable and attractive.

Looking at the clothing, hair and makeup Jill forces on her daughters, it is almost as if she doesn't want them to outshine her.  Notice Jill is never wearing mismatched clothes that don't fit.

This is such an interesting observation. The boys look good. Their clothes are not expensive, but they fit and are in style. The girls' stuff is always outdated, tacky, ill-fitting, and inappropriate for the occasion. Of course, I think Jill looks pretty bad too, so maybe she sees her daughters as little mini-me's and dresses them in her image--or a little worse. Maybe she resents them and punishes them by making them look bad. It's hard to know what is going on in that woman's mind. 

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15 minutes ago, lianau said:

Maybe "Nathan" will write glowing  reports about married life and his wonderfull mama-in-law  on Jill's social media accounts .

That's a must.LOL

12 minutes ago, cdp73 said:

I wonder if Nurie knows how to cook.  We've all seen Jill's Easter ham so I don't think she's all that good a cook to start with.

If she can put a ketchup heart on the turkey,she'll be fine.LOL

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On 6/9/2020 at 9:18 PM, doodlebug said:

Oh, I am sure that in addition to reminding him he is a sinner who needs Jesus, there's some plumbing line and a blanket involved.  Poor little kids, 

He deals with an addiction with alcohol, he gets through a medical crisis (was it a car accident?), and instead of feeling blessed and joyful, he feels he has to beat sin out of his 4 year old child?  His wife seems like a bundle of nerves despite her boho aesthetic, maybe he’s a crappy husband. It’s true what Churchoney says, this “religion” attracts a crap ton of f’ed up mean, control freak men. 

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On 6/9/2020 at 7:44 PM, Sew Sumi said:

A pic from Nurie's shower. Poor mismatched ragamuffins. 

 

I honestly thought this was a homemade photo collage of the bride at different stages of her life. They all look like the same person.

The worst-dressed award goes to the one in white with the saggy jowly top over another green top. And the sad thing is, I've seen it before. Must be her go-to top. I also feel like I've  seen it as an undergarment on a nun on  "Call the Midwife".

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Jill has presented what she credits as Nurie's writing many times on SM. Nurie supposedly came up with "sluttish" when comparing the women in Africa to the US. Nurie is just as judgmental as her mother.

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12 hours ago, ouinason said:

I listened to a little bit of Nathan's preaching and it wasn't horrible.   What I heard was him speaking about  looking to God instead of following the example of friends.  Not to lose your way by trying to be like other people that we look up to who pull away from God and Christian values.  Nothing earth shattering.  

 

He's a better speaker than I expected.

Maybe he can mentor Jeremy. 😁

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(edited)

I think Mike Keller knew all about Josh. Remember the Duggars did some sort of public confession in their church? The part where they talked about shaving heads-Josh's and one of victim's (they've never said who)? I think a lot of people knew about Josh's misdeeds and that's why got out eventually. I think Mike Keller decided Josh was a changed man and that Anna would the Duggars who were wealthier than the Kellers. 

As for Nurie and Nathan, I see no reason why the Kellers wouldn't welcome the Rods. Jill and David are like their oldest daughter Esther and her husband John Shrader, who have 12 kids and seem to grift for a living.  Nathan has a lawn care business in Florida where hopefully they will stay. The Kellers are quite a bit older than Jill and David and even JB and Michelle. According to fundiewiki, Suzette Keller is 65 and her husband Mike Keller is 60.  They don't seem to be active in the way Jill is on social media and they don't have a blog.  Usually fundie blogs are maintained by single daughters, but all the Keller daughters are out of the house and have been for some time.  The Kellers may be excited about the marriage, but have less opportunities to share it.

All the fundies we follow tend to have the same beliefs and deserve each other. 

Edited by Temperance
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(edited)

I think the molestations were certainly known within the Duggar church community, but I don't know that that would mean the Kellers were completely in the know since they're in another state. I could be wrong, but I'd be more likely to believe they knew all of it if they'd been attending that church at the same time or had a closer relationship with the Duggars than they seem to have. 

Edited by Zella
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17 minutes ago, Zella said:

I think the molestations were certainly known within the Duggar church community, but I don't know that that would mean the Kellers were completely in the know since they're in another state. I could be wrong, but I'd be more likely to believe they knew all of it if they'd been attending that church at the same time or had a closer relationship with the Duggars than they seem to have. 

I agree. Boob plays things very close to the vest. I can totally see him downplaying Smuggar's actions into something like "a youthful indiscretion."

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Plus when you confess and ask for forgiveness the sin is forgotten so it’s like it never happened. So to the Keller’s Joshley was a catch for Anna. Seems like Anna was clueless about the situation no matter what she says later on so she had no reason to say no to Smuggar.

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Didn't Anna claim her parents told her about Smuggar when they started courting?  That's why I buy the Kellers getting a sanitized version of the truth.

That said, as @ozziemom noted, they believed the slate was clean and Smuggar absolved of his sin. So yeah, no big deal  for Pa Keller to approve the relationship.

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6 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Even if Jill won't let them wear dresses that don't hit mid-calf, there are plenty of dresses that length for kids and teens. 

These clothes are probably from the second hand store (marked way down because they're out of style even to the other shoppers there.)

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(edited)

My guess--based on what the Duggar party line was in the interviews--is that Anna and her parents were told some variation of "Josh was curious about girls." And I suspect that most people would think he was caught making out with some girl or watching porn and not interpret that as "He repeatedly molested his sisters, including one who was as young as five." 

Edited by Zella
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Oh meant to add: And I do not find it surprising that the Kellers likely fudged how much they knew after it emerged. Because by that point, they were all bound together, and it wouldn't do then to admit that the Duggars were lying assholes or that they had been duped because that doesn't match their collection narrative about how much godlier and blessed they are than everyone else. 

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I do kind of wonder how Pa Keller reacted when the truth came out. Did he still feel that Smuggar was forgiven? I mean, for Anna, that was nothing (or so she said). It was the cheating that drove her to the brink.

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The molestations were probably nothing for Anna because Josh wasn't married to her when they happened. He was married to her when he cheated - hence, a bigger deal to Anna. She may have blamed herself more for Josh cheating (i.e., not submitting enough, not Godly enough for him) whereas she had nothing to do with the molestations.

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I've always had the impression that the Keller parents were very laid back, in the sense they go about their business 'saving' inmates and pretty much just live their lives. Even with their other children they seem to be live and let live.

I can see Mr Keller taking whatever he was told as fact, which I do not believe was the full picture, and not pushing it. I do think whatever he knew included the "sin at camp" election computer porn, because he had Josh agree to allow Anna to control his internet use. (but we all know that didn't happen)

 


 

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In other news Erin Bates has posted that her "biggest struggle" is her phone. Timing is everything and her post screams of tone deafness.

Not every SM post needs to reflect the current state of our country or the struggle of BIPOC, but Erin would have done better to post a recipe or something and save her white privilege struggle for another time.

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10 hours ago, Zella said:

My guess--based on what the Duggar party line was in the interviews--is that Anna and her parents were told some variation of "Josh was curious about girls." And I suspect that most people would think he was caught making out with some girl or watching porn and not interpret that as "He repeatedly molested his sisters, including one who was as young as five." 

Yeah that’s what I thought. I thought josh got caught watching porn and hooking up (consensually), with another teenage girl, was seen by the church elders and punished. 
 

Not that he assaulted his own sisters and someone else repeatedly, including a 5year old. 

 

9 hours ago, madpsych78 said:

The molestations were probably nothing for Anna because Josh wasn't married to her when they happened. He was married to her when he cheated - hence, a bigger deal to Anna. She may have blamed herself more for Josh cheating (i.e., not submitting enough, not Godly enough for him) whereas she had nothing to do with the molestations.

That’s a very self centered view of looking at the world but it makes sense. Especially if marriage to Anna was supposed to “curb” these appetites in Josh and then he embarrassed the family in such a public way. 

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That's how I thought of it.  The Kellers were told a very sanitized version of what happened with Josh.  They, in turn, told Anna an even more sanitized version of what they'd been told.

When the truth came out, and I'm not sure if even we know the whole truth, Anna was stuck.  She had three or four kids, and one on the way.  The Duggar's latched onto her, took her in, and she was stuck.  She'd never made an idependent decision in her life and had no idea of how to proceed if she wanted to.  If her parents had wanted her to come home to them, we'll never know.  

But what we do know is that Pa Keller had already lost a couple of kids to 'the world' and Esther to John Shrader.  John seemed to be on the same wavelength as they were when he married Esther, but when he went rogue, the Kellers kept quiet publicly and she's stuck in Zambia with 11 kids so far.  We don't know if they ever tried to get Esther to come home, but John hasn't allowed the whole family to visit the Kellers in years, he's only allowed Esther to visit briefly with a few of the children and kept the rest away.  Kind of like a hostage situation.

One of Anna's older brothers, who had already left the fold, claimed publicly that he'd take in Anna and the kids, but I don't know if she ever knew about it.  Was she supposed to tell the Duggars that she'd stay with them until her brother came to collect her?  Would she know that they didn't have a right to keep her kids if she left?  Anna was never raised to consider that she might have to work and support her children if her husband was removed from the picture.  She'd never worked a paid job in her life.

For Anna, as much as she might have wanted to leave and do away with the Duggar way, she was living with them and they had enormous control over her.  She and her kids were put in the communal girls dorm and under their eye all the time.  She had becomed accustomed to a better standard of living since marrying Josh and had no way of knowing if their lives would improve if she ended up living with her family.  She might have worried that the Duggars could take her kids if she left.  She was fed a steady diet of religious doctrine about leave and cleave, and submitting to her husband and his family.  Michelle even put out a truly horrendous statement about how a wife was supposed to be the calming force in easing a man's natural tendency towards sexual sin, and if she failed her man might just stray.

I think that Anna welcomed Josh back with open arms, but I also suspect that she did it after deciding that it was the best option instead of trying to go it alone.  I'm not sure that her emotions are so star-struck and girlish adoration as when she married him.  She might feel it unseemly or ungodly to publicly chastise him, but I suspect that there's a part of her that relishes in having more kids when it was obvious that he didn't want any more even before the scandle.  To have the Duggars fully support them while she fulfills her quest to have kids, a cowed husband at hand, appearances on a TV show...Anna might just have realized her power and is happily making the most of it.

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20 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Looking at the clothing, hair and makeup Jill forces on her daughters, it is almost as if she doesn't want them to outshine her.  Notice Jill is never wearing mismatched clothes that don't fit.

Hit the nail on the head. NOBODY can look "better" than JillR.

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(edited)
19 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

10 pictures:

 

so what does that mean "last time we won"t have to say goodbye to Nurie"? isn't she in theory moving to florida??

Edited by crazy8s
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