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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet


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12 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

That’s great news. Hopefully, things will continue to go well. Also, if possible I’d take advantage of rehab. It can help in so many ways.

Yes, we have told her to accept any rehab or services that are offered even if it means going to a rehab facility for a month. Unfortunately,  I've had to go to rehab numerous times and she has visited friends there so she knows how it works & it's only for a month.  So I guess we'll see what the doctor recommends later today when she can get up. 

10 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Omg, that’s amazing Sixlets. Glad you have a plan in place. What a bizarre day.

@sixlets, Wow, what a day you had. I'm also glad you were able to get a plan. 

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  Just got back from seeing my therapist. She said believing in a higher power isn't for everyone, and she won't mention it again..so there's that. She said she just mentioned it because I said felt I was addicted to food..and some addiction programs work with a higher power mindset... something like that. I guess I just stay fat.

 Rest of the session I basically cried and cried about my shitty PR trip, and how I was treated.

 Now she wants me to write everyone involved a letter, saying how much it all upset me, and that I won't ever let myself be put in that position again.

I'm scared to do it.😟

Edited by ChiCricket
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1 hour ago, ChiCricket said:

  Just got back from seeing my therapist. She said believing in a higher power isn't for everyone, and she won't mention it again..so there's that. She said she just mentioned it because I said felt I was addicted to food..and some addiction programs work with a higher power mindset... something like that. I guess I just stay fat.

 Rest of the session I basically cried and cried about my shitty PR trip, and how I was treated.

 Now she wants me to write everyone involved a letter, saying how much it all upset me, and that I won't ever let myself be put in that position again.

I'm scared to do it.😟

You don't have to give them the letters!  Sometimes just writing it out helps.  And you can make a decision inside your own head about what positions you won't put yourself in ever again.  I did that when I was working.  I decided I wouldn't tolerate the boss screaming at me.  I never told anyone but I rehearsed scenarios in my head.  I must have projected something because he never did scream at me again.  And I never told anybody!!  And write here.  It will help, I'm pretty sure!  

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2 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

  Just got back from seeing my therapist. She said believing in a higher power isn't for everyone, and she won't mention it again..so there's that. She said she just mentioned it because I said felt I was addicted to food..and some addiction programs work with a higher power mindset... something like that. I guess I just stay fat.

 Rest of the session I basically cried and cried about my shitty PR trip, and how I was treated.

 Now she wants me to write everyone involved a letter, saying how much it all upset me, and that I won't ever let myself be put in that position again.

I'm scared to do it.😟

I keep a journal it helps. Write the letter it will make you feel better.

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ChiCricket, do it! Remember how mad you got, how upset it made you, how sad it made you, and write all of that out. You don't have to give anyone the letters but it will probably help to get it all down and out and let it go. And like lookeyloo said, it might even help you in ways you don't know. 

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Ask the therapist to recommend some books on setting boundaries or to help you develop some appropriate boundaries and learn how to enforce them.  It helps a lot.  Also help in establishing goals and how to reach them.  It takes practice!

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8 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I need some suggestions please. I need to buy a new couch and have about 500.00 to 600.00 dollars to spend. One of the problems is I have no car so I have to buy it on line. Does anyone have any brands to suggest?

One of my friends swears by Wayfair. We also have a “slightly used” furniture resale store nearby. They deliver for $50. My only distrust of those other sites that ship are that I once had one that would only deliver to the bottom of my driveway. I couldn’t possibly have toted that cabinet I bought inside, even with help. I had to use their “white glove” service which is what really took the cost OTT. 
I hope you find the sofa of your dreams. 

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2 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I wrote one of those letters to my mother. 

....who then snooped through my house and found it. 

So burn that sucker after you write it 😉

Wow I can’t believe your mom did that! That’s so wrong.

Edited by galaxychaser
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1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

One of my friends swears by Wayfair. We also have a “slightly used” furniture resale store nearby. They deliver for $50. My only distrust of those other sites that ship are that I once had one that would only deliver to the bottom of my driveway. I couldn’t possibly have toted that cabinet I bought inside, even with help. I had to use their “white glove” service which is what really took the cost OTT. 
I hope you find the sofa of your dreams. 

I looked at Wayfair but all the reviews talk about the couch being hard. It is on my list but a concern. As I am 63 any couch I get will need to be set up or at least brought into the house. Thank you for the recommendation.

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3 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

I wrote one of those letters to my mother. 

....who then snooped through my house and found it. 

So burn that sucker after you write it 😉

I guess that kind of made your point, huh?

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2 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I need some suggestions please. I need to buy a new couch and have about 500.00 to 600.00 dollars to spend. One of the problems is I have no car so I have to buy it on line. Does anyone have any brands to suggest?

Look on Wayfair. They have an app too

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1 hour ago, Mindthinkr said:

Since you don’t drive, and I don’t know where you are, have you considered using  Uber? 

*Smiling* I do drive just do not have a car. I use Lyft but that can get expensive to get to Costco it would be about $20.00 round trip ( that's including tip) so I don't want to spend that much unless I am sure they have what I need. I do appreciate the suggestion,I Googled Costco furniture and they do have some nice things but the couches shown are out of my price range and look like they would be too big for my apartment.

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1 hour ago, not you again said:

I believe I saw someone mention here an item for short people to use with car seat belts - can someone give me the info if you know what I'm talking about?  I'm 5'1", have a 50 mile commute 5 days a week, and am tired of fighting with my seat belt.  Thanks!

I use this one. (a 2 pack is about $10)

Adult seat belt adjuster

I'm 5'2" and they cut me on the neck too...always. Everyone always says "just use the button on the car to adjust it!" but it still cuts me in the neck (just me?😁)

I carry one in my purse for when I'm not in my own car. 

Edited by ChiCricket
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20 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I looked at Wayfair but all the reviews talk about the couch being hard. It is on my list but a concern. As I am 63 any couch I get will need to be set up or at least brought into the house. Thank you for the recommendation.

I'll just share my couch purchase experience, which was a fiasco.  Well, one of them was.  I researched and looked around a LOT for a special sofa.  I ended up getting a large sectional with a chaise lounge attached at the end.  It took a few weeks and was delivered and set up, but, it was quite expensive.  I picked the wrong fabric last minute and also the sectional was not a good fit for my space, EVEN though, I measured....just a cluster all the way around.  Then, I stored it, but, am using it now.  Still like new, but, still not happy with it.  

I purchased a love seat couch years ago from a person online. It was a very comfortable piece, great condition, like new, for $50.00!  I didn't have a truck handy, so, rented a van that day, transported it to my house and got friends to help me move it inside when I arrived.  Even with the rental, it was a great deal! LOVED the love seat, got many compliments, lots of use, and when done gave it to a family member who used it for a couple of years until they and their kids wore it out.  

I know it's iffy with furniture though.  Some of the stores sale furniture on credit with no interest for TWO years, but, you have to be sure to never be late with a payment.  They may deliver too. You can read reviews online for places like Bassett, Ashely, Haverty's, ......A friend of mine used to buy all of her furniture from JC PENNEY. They're having a sale.  It was nice..........Here's a link.

https://www.jcpenney.com/g/home-store/furniture-store/view-all-living-room-furniture?collection=possibilities&item_type=sofas&id=cat1002460008&boostIds=ppr5007222247-ppr5007222331-ppr5007222199&cm_re=ZK-_-grid-_-DEPT-FURNITURE_-Grid-4-_-FabricPossibilities_PDS|4|

A friend of mine has a couch from Sam's Club and it looks nice, but, is very hard and uncomfortable for me, but, they may have other options. Also, I don't think they deliver. 

 

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A few years ago, I bought a couch and some other living room furniture from Bob’s Discount Furniture.  When I went to the store, I found out that the couch I wanted was no longer available.  I ordered a couch I was not thrilled with, but the salesperson told me that all of Bob’s clearance stuff was online.  I checked online when I got home, and the couch I wanted in the color I wanted was available.  The best part was that is was $100 less than it would have been in the store.  It was delivered in a few days and I’ve been very happy.  Nice microfiber/velour fabric and memory foam cushions—all for about $400.  That may be an option for you.

 

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22 hours ago, crazycatlady58 said:

I need some suggestions please. I need to buy a new couch and have about 500.00 to 600.00 dollars to spend. One of the problems is I have no car so I have to buy it on line. Does anyone have any brands to suggest?

Do you have an Ashley Furniture near you?  Some of their stuff isn’t the best, but some is pretty decent.  We bought this sofa set for my niece for about $500 for both pieces.  It’s called the Darcy but it may not be your style though.  It’s microfiber and cleans like a dream, and it comes in a lot of colors. It’s always on sale and you can buy it online.  

ETA: It’s on sale for $299 in my area.

727CCA88-07A9-47B3-BD22-40E68AB817A5.jpeg

Edited by Ijustwantsomechips
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9 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Thanks so much for all the information. This is just what I needed. My main concern is the comfort and y'all have given me some ideas.

My sister got a beautiful, almost like new couch at Goodwill for $15! It was originally $30 I think, but she had a coupon and then they had a special on it. It's really pretty and it's almost like no one ever sat on it.

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57 minutes ago, crazycatlady58 said:

Thanks so much for all the information. This is just what I needed. My main concern is the comfort and y'all have given me some ideas.

Oh, one more thing. Look at the measurements. Some furniture is made super small and that might not be too comfortable. Also, the width of the seating area is often narrow on some couches. I like it wide so I can nap on it with a friend. Lol Not good if you have short legs though.

My brother bought two different recliners on line. One was fine, but one of them looks like it was made for baby bear! Lol

Edited by SunnyBeBe
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My grifter friend has histrionic personality disorder!!! That describes her to a t. Now she claims Dr Oz is her godfather and will walk down the isle. She got a fiancé again and maybe a boyfriend hee hee ha ha to quote her. This is her 3rd fiancé since I met her. 

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Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

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36 minutes ago, emma675 said:

Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

Yeah I kind of have a baseline of tolerance. Like you, I have year-round allergies. I take Zyrtec and Nasacort, and I can tell a difference when I don't take them, but I still have to get yearly steroid shots on top of them and even then my allergies aren't entirely remedied. 

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8 hours ago, emma675 said:

Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

Yes, this has happened to me. I used to use Claritin-D, but then a couple of years ago, it stopped working, so I switched to Zyrtec. Then this year, I started Zyrtec last week and then on Wednesday it just stopped working. I was MISERABLE on Thursday, but started Allegra on Friday and it totally cleared me up. I'm hoping I can keep cycling through allergy meds every few year, so I don't have to do allergy shots, but we'll see.

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I think I'm going to try Zyrtec or Allegra next. Claritin worked so well for so long but not anymore. Living in the south and being allergic to dust equals year round allergies. 

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15 hours ago, emma675 said:

Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

Oh gosh yes. And Claritin took my sense of smell away temporarily and allerest gave me blurry vision temporarily. Zyrtec only works so so on my allergies. 

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16 hours ago, emma675 said:

Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

Claritin has never worked for me. I've gone between Zyrtec & Allegra til they stopped working.  Now I'm taking "Chlor Tabs", the Walmart generic Equate version of Chlor-Trimeton. It's an older antihistamine, I used to take it before the 24 hour ones came on the market. It works great for me in stopping my constant runny nose.  The only downfall is that it's a 4-6 hour medicine.  I usually take 1 in the morning & 1at lunch & (rarely) 1 at bedtime if needed.  It doesn't make me sleepy & it's  cheap- around $3.00 for 100 pills. So for me I end up only taking 2 of them daily so it's no big deal that it's  a 4-6 hour medicine. 

 

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4 hours ago, emma675 said:

I think I'm going to try Zyrtec or Allegra next. Claritin worked so well for so long but not anymore. Living in the south and being allergic to dust equals year round allergies. 

I usually take Allegra.  I live in the south and a few years ago I went on a trip to Wyoming at the end of May and my allergies acted up to the point that everyone on the trip made a comment about it. Yeah, I suffered through allergies in the South and then again in the West.  Now I usually take Allegra year round, especially since plants start blooming in February sometimes since our weather warms up so much. 

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(edited)
5 minutes ago, Lisa418722 said:

I usually take Allegra.  I live in the south and a few years ago I went on a trip to Wyoming at the end of May and my allergies acted up to the point that everyone on the trip made a comment about it. Yeah, I suffered through allergies in the South and then again in the West.  Now I usually take Allegra year round, especially since plants start blooming in February sometimes since our weather warms up so much. 

Yeah I have to take them year round too. I'm allergic to molds, dust, and several types of pollen, so it's a year-round allergy party for me. 🙄

Based on this conversation, I'm going to chat with my doctor about switching to Allegra. In the past, Claritin never did anything for me. Though of course maybe that's changed too!

I just can't with Flonase. It's sort of perfumey to me, and I can't handle that. 

Edited by Zella
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3 minutes ago, Zella said:

Based on this conversation, I'm going to chat with my doctor about switching to Allegra. In the past, Claritin never did anything for me. Though of course maybe that's changed too!

The general recommendation with antihistamines is to try one and see if it works. If it doesn't, try another.

Zyrtec, Claritin, and Allegra are where people start because they're readily available and easy. Xyzal (levocetirizine) might be an option but because it's newer and there's not a lot of data to suggest it works better than Zyrtec it's usually not one people try. I'm not sure that Clarinex (desloratidine) ever had a OTC release, but you could talk to your doctor about that one, too. What works for someone might not work the best or at all for someone else.

Chlorpheniramine (Aller-Chlor) is an older antihistamine that falls between Zyrtec/Claritin/Allegra and Benadryl on the sleepiness scale. Some people don't experience any, but most people say it makes them kind of tired. 

Diphenhydramine (Benadryl) is a first generation antihistamine and works well, but it's going to make you drowsy. It's often the active ingredient in the OTC sleep aids like ZzQuil. 

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20 hours ago, emma675 said:

Fellow allergy sufferers, have you found your body builds up a tolerance to meds after a while? Claritin and Nasacort nose spray used to work pretty well for me but neither seems to be doing its job anymore. My nose is like a faucet lately and I've got a lot of drainage down my throat (gross). I have year round allergies thanks to dust and pollen. Guess I'm going to search for a new routine (and I already do allergy shots on top of this).

YES. I took Allegra for ages (even back when it used to be Seldane, which was taken off the market) then about 5-6 years ago it stopped working and now I use Zyrtec. I need to take if year round. One of the things I learned when I had a massive allergic reaction was to take it with Tagamet when my allergies are really bad (lilac to cottonwood season); it acts as a second level antihistamine. I am sadly allergic to Benadryl. 
 

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9 minutes ago, McManda said:

The general recommendation with antihistamines is to try one and see if it works. If it doesn't, try another.

Zyrtec, Claritin, and Allegra are where people start because they're readily available and easy. Xyzal (levocetirizine) might be an option but because it's newer and there's not a lot of data to suggest it works better than Zyrtec it's usually not one people try. I'm not sure that Clarinex (desloratidine) ever had a OTC release, but you could talk to your doctor about that one, too. What works for someone might not work the best or at all for someone else.

Chlorpheniramine (Aller-Chlor) is an older antihistamine that falls between Zyrtec/Claritin/Allegra and Benadryl on the sleepiness scale. Some people don't experience any, but most people say it makes them kind of tired. 

Diphenhydramine (Benadryl) is a first generation antihistamine and works well, but it's going to make you drowsy. It's often the active ingredient in the OTC sleep aids like ZzQuil. 

Thank you--this is very helpful! I was on a prescription allergy medicine temporarily last year. (I had bronchitis, and they took me off my OTC stuff and gave me Singulair while I was on the bronchitis meds.) I'm not entirely sure it made much of a difference, but it was hard to tell since I was sick. I've always avoided benadryl because of the drowsiness factor. 

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1 minute ago, Zella said:

Thank you--this is very helpful! I was on a prescription allergy medicine temporarily last year. (I had bronchitis, and they took me off my OTC stuff and gave me Singulair while I was on the bronchitis meds.) I'm not entirely sure it made much of a difference, but it was hard to tell since I was sick. I've always avoided benadryl because of the drowsiness factor. 

Singulair is an asthma medication. 

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Yep, year round allergy pill taker here, too. Benadryl works for me but it knocks me out for up to 18 hours. If I really need to sleep and the dog can let herself in and out with the dog door, I'll use it, lol.

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(edited)
22 minutes ago, latetotheparty said:

Singulair is an asthma medication. 

Yes, but it's used for allergies too, and that was why it was given to me. 

Edited by Zella
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I just wanted to pop in and say thank you all for the support on my last post.  I still haven't been ready to make it known to everyone, but it made a huge difference to talk here.  Thank you again 😚

Count me in as another year-round allergy sufferer.  I never had to deal with allergies as a kid, but it hit suddenly in my mid-20s.  I've taken numerous meds over the years, but I've been doing generic Zyrtec (I get a bottle of 360 for less than $15 on Amazon) and generic Singulair (montelukast).  If I know I will be out and about, I also add a generic Sudafed, but it has to be the legit stuff behind the counter. Benadryl does nothing for me allergy wise, but it doesn't knock me out either.  We've had such a mild winter with a snowless February, so I have a feeling the allergies are going to rough for a lot of folks in this new season 😉 

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I have been taking Flonase and generic Claritin from April through July for about 15 years. It still works for me, but I fear the day when I have to try another combination. We’ve had such a mild winter in New England this year that I should probably start taking both medicines early.

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(edited)
10 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

I got molested in Barnes and Noble tonight.

Bad friends, bad landlord, and molested in a book store. Have you thought about starting fresh outside of New York?

What do you like about New York?

What do you hate about New York?

Edited by kokapetl
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I paid for my books and left. I didn’t call the cops.


This is not the first time I got molested/assaulted in public or private. It’s a part of being a female I guess. Men feel like it’s okay to do what they want to women,

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