Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[Barb23]

@Scarlett45  One of my home nurses had problems with an uninvited little critter & like you, had pest control come out & set traps but still couldn't find or catch him.   Believe it or not, they found him in one of their recliners (and it was a newer one.)  He had chewed a small hole in the bottom & made himself at home in all the stuffing.  They only realized it when they started to find puffs of cotton stuffing laying around.  I forget what they did to finally get rid of him but at least they knew where his hideout was. They did throw away the chair.  

@sixlets Thanks for thinking about me & Yes, it was a crazy day Friday in our neck of the woods. We rarely lose power unless something big hits like a hurricane but it did go out for about an hour Friday afternoon. Not sure what happened as our wires are buried underground in our neighborhood.  That tornado(es) was scary & my son's coworkers were worried about him getting to work OK. He drives south down I-95 from AA county to Montgomery County.  Luckily the line of the storms had already passed by the time he drives his route but he was still  glad to arrive without any problems. The pictures of the devastated farms in Frederick County (I think) were something.  Glad you all were OK.   Sorry to hear about your finger. My mom shut the end of one of her fingers in our old heavy storm windows when I was little. Very painful & she ended up with a disfigured end of finger & fingernail. Hope yours is healing well. 

@lookeyloo & @EVS. I think about you often & sending cyber hugs your way.

Wishing us all a  good week.

[Jeeves]

The subject of use - and misuse - of facilities for people with disabilities and special needs, came up over in the "Sweet Fellowship" topic. (Jill Rodrigues posted photos on IG of them shopping at Lowe's, with her non-special-needs daughter obviously riding in the store's "Caroline's cart" which is for use by special needs kids. Bah on her.)

This is a bit off that topic but I thought I'd ask for feedback on something that relates to the use of those hangtags for "handicapped" aka accessible parking spaces. (I'm really over the word "handicapped" but that seems to be the term in use for now.) 

I fortunately don't have mobility impairments. I have a couple of friends who do. Here's what we have done, and I wonder if there would have been a better way. (TBH each of these friends has had some health downturns lately and I don't know that we'll all be going out together as we used to, but my question still lingers anyway, so thanks for bearing with me here.)

Each of my friends has their own accessible parking hangtag/placard, duly issued by the state, etc. Each of them can walk on their own, but slowly and with varying degrees of difficulty, and uses a cane and sometimes needs a walker. We used to often go out to a play or concert, often preceded by dinner out. I would drive. Especially at the performing arts complex where we usually were headed, I would enter the parking garage, then stop at a spot close to the building entrance and let them out. Then I'd head on up the ramp to the parking levels, park in the closest available accessible spot, pop their hangtag on the rearview mirror, and walk down to join them in the building. (The garage is located across a big outdoor plaza from the entrances to the various venues in the complex.) After the event was over, we would all walk back to the car, which is why it was important for me to park as close as possible to the entrance. The layout and traffic patterns inside the garage, combined the the crowd of everyone leaving an event at the same time, made it not feasible, if not impossible, for me to pick up my friends at the spot where I could let them out after pulling the ticket to enter the garage.

So, there I was, an able-bodied person, parking in a "handicapped" spot, displaying a placard, and hopping out of (okay, I'm 70+ and my hopping days are over, so let's say "exiting") the car, and walking unassisted down to the theater entrance. Anyone who saw me could be outraged and think I was misusing the placard. Once, I smiled at a couple who were passing and gave me the stink-eye, and said "I've just dropped off my friend who needs this space, but she'll have to walk back here after the play." I'm not sure they believed me.

So, WAS I misusing the placard? I'd really like to know what people think. 

[galaxychaser]

No

[MargeGunderson]

@Jeeves, I think you are using the sign/space appropriately. 

@crazycatlady58, exactly. 

Edited February 10, 2020 by MargeGunderson

[crazycatlady58]

No, you were not. I am trying not to judge seemingly able-bodied people who use the handicapped parking space. Some people have invisible handicaps. They may look healthy but they may have a heart problem ect. We do not know what's going on with someone.

[Ohiopirate02]

55 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

The subject of use - and misuse - of facilities for people with disabilities and special needs, came up over in the "Sweet Fellowship" topic. (Jill Rodrigues posted photos on IG of them shopping at Lowe's, with her non-special-needs daughter obviously riding in the store's "Caroline's cart" which is for use by special needs kids. Bah on her.)

This is a bit off that topic but I thought I'd ask for feedback on something that relates to the use of those hangtags for "handicapped" aka accessible parking spaces. (I'm really over the word "handicapped" but that seems to be the term in use for now.) 

I fortunately don't have mobility impairments. I have a couple of friends who do. Here's what we have done, and I wonder if there would have been a better way. (TBH each of these friends has had some health downturns lately and I don't know that we'll all be going out together as we used to, but my question still lingers anyway, so thanks for bearing with me here.)

Each of my friends has their own accessible parking hangtag/placard, duly issued by the state, etc. Each of them can walk on their own, but slowly and with varying degrees of difficulty, and uses a cane and sometimes needs a walker. We used to often go out to a play or concert, often preceded by dinner out. I would drive. Especially at the performing arts complex where we usually were headed, I would enter the parking garage, then stop at a spot close to the building entrance and let them out. Then I'd head on up the ramp to the parking levels, park in the closest available accessible spot, pop their hangtag on the rearview mirror, and walk down to join them in the building. (The garage is located across a big outdoor plaza from the entrances to the various venues in the complex.) After the event was over, we would all walk back to the car, which is why it was important for me to park as close as possible to the entrance. The layout and traffic patterns inside the garage, combined the the crowd of everyone leaving an event at the same time, made it not feasible, if not impossible, for me to pick up my friends at the spot where I could let them out after pulling the ticket to enter the garage.

So, there I was, an able-bodied person, parking in a "handicapped" spot, displaying a placard, and hopping out of (okay, I'm 70+ and my hopping days are over, so let's say "exiting") the car, and walking unassisted down to the theater entrance. Anyone who saw me could be outraged and think I was misusing the placard. Once, I smiled at a couple who were passing and gave me the stink-eye, and said "I've just dropped off my friend who needs this space, but she'll have to walk back here after the play." I'm not sure they believed me.

So, WAS I misusing the placard? I'd really like to know what people think. 

I see nothing wrong with you using the accessible spaces with your friends.  The only thing I would caution is try to leave the van accessible spots open for those with a van.  Many parking lots are technically accessible as in they are ADA compliant based on the year of creation, but they fall short in actual use.  There are many parking spots which are designated as handicapped but a person using a lift van would not be able to park their van and get out of it.  

[kokapetl]

@Jeeves No, that seems perfectly valid. 

[Zella]

@Jeeves, I think that sounds fine. We actually do something similar for a relative of mine who was in a serious wreck. She's progressed from wheelchair to walker to now cane, so she has more mobility than she did, but she usually has a friend or other relative driving for her when my family meets her for lunch at her favorite restaurant. I'm sure anyone who sees her friends/family park the vehicle would be outraged at some able-bodied person jumping out of the minivan, but if they'd witnessed her being dropped off beforehand, they'd realize it's legitimate. I think a lot of people are very quick to judge when they don't have all the facts. 

[Absolom]

I've had a placard for over 40 years now.  The insert that comes with mine specifically allows it to be used for pick up or drop off of the holder or when driving the holder.  My kids have used it when driving me since they began to drive.  You're fine and doing what's right for your friends in not making them take a longer walk than necessary at the end of event!

[fonfereksglen]

1 hour ago, Jeeves said:

The subject of use - and misuse - of facilities for people with disabilities and special needs, came up over in the "Sweet Fellowship" topic. (Jill Rodrigues posted photos on IG of them shopping at Lowe's, with her non-special-needs daughter obviously riding in the store's "Caroline's cart" which is for use by special needs kids. Bah on her.)

This is a bit off that topic but I thought I'd ask for feedback on something that relates to the use of those hangtags for "handicapped" aka accessible parking spaces. (I'm really over the word "handicapped" but that seems to be the term in use for now.) 

I fortunately don't have mobility impairments. I have a couple of friends who do. Here's what we have done, and I wonder if there would have been a better way. (TBH each of these friends has had some health downturns lately and I don't know that we'll all be going out together as we used to, but my question still lingers anyway, so thanks for bearing with me here.)

Each of my friends has their own accessible parking hangtag/placard, duly issued by the state, etc. Each of them can walk on their own, but slowly and with varying degrees of difficulty, and uses a cane and sometimes needs a walker. We used to often go out to a play or concert, often preceded by dinner out. I would drive. Especially at the performing arts complex where we usually were headed, I would enter the parking garage, then stop at a spot close to the building entrance and let them out. Then I'd head on up the ramp to the parking levels, park in the closest available accessible spot, pop their hangtag on the rearview mirror, and walk down to join them in the building. (The garage is located across a big outdoor plaza from the entrances to the various venues in the complex.) After the event was over, we would all walk back to the car, which is why it was important for me to park as close as possible to the entrance. The layout and traffic patterns inside the garage, combined the the crowd of everyone leaving an event at the same time, made it not feasible, if not impossible, for me to pick up my friends at the spot where I could let them out after pulling the ticket to enter the garage.

So, there I was, an able-bodied person, parking in a "handicapped" spot, displaying a placard, and hopping out of (okay, I'm 70+ and my hopping days are over, so let's say "exiting") the car, and walking unassisted down to the theater entrance. Anyone who saw me could be outraged and think I was misusing the placard. Once, I smiled at a couple who were passing and gave me the stink-eye, and said "I've just dropped off my friend who needs this space, but she'll have to walk back here after the play." I'm not sure they believed me.

So, WAS I misusing the placard? I'd really like to know what people think. 

No.  I do the same with my husband.

[CalicoKitty]

No, that is the correct use of the placard.  As long as you are providing transportation for the holder, you are fine.

[ginger90]

On the other side....I was caregiver to a man who had handicapped plates. I would drive him to appointments, the store, etc.. One day I was just going to be running into a convenience store for him, and he was going to be waiting in his vehicle. I pulled into a regular spot, and he blasted me for not using a handicapped spot. Why would I? He wasn’t getting out. 🤦‍♀️

@Jeeves you did the right thing.

[Jeeves]

Wow, thanks to all of you for the thoughtful replies. I was pretty sure that I wasn't stepping out of line in those situations - but I do feel self-conscious if I'm parking the car displaying the accessible hang-tag after the drop-off of the passengers. Thanks for the reassurance.

[fonfereksglen]

2 hours ago, ginger90 said:

On the other side....I was caregiver to a man who had handicapped plates. I would drive him to appointments, the store, etc.. One day I was just going to be running into a convenience store for him, and he was going to be waiting in his vehicle. I pulled into a regular spot, and he blasted me for not using a handicapped spot. Why would I? He wasn’t getting out. 🤦‍♀️

@Jeeves you did the right thing.

My husband did that to me ...... once.  😁😁

I would like to confess I once parked in a space that was "reserved for expectant mothers."  I may be gray haired, in my 60s and lacking any of the important parts,  but who was going to tell?

[Jynnan tonnix]

Any thoughts on using handicapped stalls in public restrooms or dressing rooms in department stores? If they are the only ones available and I don't see any wheelchairs waiting, it seems fine to use those. The ones in the dressing rooms generally have bigger mirrors, so I do kind of like to use those.

[ehall1052]

3 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Any thoughts on using handicapped stalls in public restrooms or dressing rooms in department stores? If they are the only ones available and I don't see any wheelchairs waiting, it seems fine to use those. The ones in the dressing rooms generally have bigger mirrors, so I do kind of like to use those.

I have to admit that I use the handicapped stall all the time even though I’m not in a wheelchair. I have a VERY bad hip and must use the bars to get off the commode. One time, at an interstate rest stop, I use a regular stall and had to put my hand on the toilet paper holder to get up, and the whole thing broke off the wall (I think others had done the same thing!) I don’t want that to ever happen again!

[zoomama]

On 2/10/2020 at 8:16 AM, Ohiopirate02 said:

I see nothing wrong with you using the accessible spaces with your friends.  The only thing I would caution is try to leave the van accessible spots open for those with a van.  Many parking lots are technically accessible as in they are ADA compliant based on the year of creation, but they fall short in actual use.  There are many parking spots which are designated as handicapped but a person using a lift van would not be able to park their van and get out of it.  

i have a handicap placard due to my breathing issues. i dont look any different than anyone else and if i dont need to carry my 02, you wouldn't guess. i try to avoid the space on the left because of van use and wheelchairs of others. however, if it is the only one there to use, i will. if i am having a reasonable day breathing, i dont take a handicap space at all.

as to the handicap stall, i always use it to have the support of the rail. with my lack of good breathing and therefore lack of reasonable exercise, my weight is enormous. it is a tough call to fit in a regular stall comfortably.  and i dont feel guilty about it either! unhappy with my weight, yes,....but not guilty or ashamed to use the handicap stall.

Edited February 11, 2020 by zoomama

[Lisa418722]

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Any thoughts on using handicapped stalls in public restrooms or dressing rooms in department stores? If they are the only ones available and I don't see any wheelchairs waiting, it seems fine to use those. The ones in the dressing rooms generally have bigger mirrors, so I do kind of like to use those.

I will use a handicapped stall if is the only one available (or if the other available stalls are nasty).  I figure I'm not going to be in there that long.  My mom (who uses a cane and has major arthritis) will sometimes go shopping with me. If I'm trying on clothes, she can't really stand there waiting on me, so I'll use the dressing room that gives her a place to sit and me room to try on my clothing.

[CherryMalotte]

My husband has a placard due to his RA - his meds have kept his flare ups under control for the most part but he still has them occasionally.  I have to admit that I use it when I've taken my dad for his groceries or to his VA visits.  He doesn't like to walk far and his balance isn't great - though this would improve if he'd walk a bit more and get some exercise as his doctor has said.  If it's just me I like to park out in the blue yonder because the walk is good for me.

While the dna testing can be a good thing - there is that downside as well.  I won't do it unless it involved my daughter for whatever medical reason.  A couple of years ago out of the blue I had a FB message, as did my daughter from a woman reaching out to us.  She stated that my grandfather was listed as her father on her birth certificate, she had a bit of info on him supposedly from her mother, and while she wasn't asking for anything in particular it spooked the hell out of me.  I blocked her without responding and my daughter did the same, and around the same time I had calls from a PA number which would have been the same area this woman lived in.  I don't know if it was somebody setting up an elaborate scam or just honestly reaching out but I really don't want to know.  It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if he'd gotten some woman knocked up as he was not faithful to my grandmother but at the same time he wasn't stupid and I'd think he'd have made sure that it wouldn't have happened.  My dad never mentioned anything to me, so I'm going to assume she never contacted him.  The whole incident creeped me out big time.

Anybody watching the Westminster Dog Show?  

[SunnyBeBe]

Oh my goodness....I just saw this preview for a show about foster children in my state who are in need of forever families.  OMG, it touched my heart.  I can't even imagine......if circumstances were right, I'd try to provide a child a home.  

 https://www.wral.com/forever-family-shares-stories-of-children-looking-for-adoption/18944400/

[Mindthinkr]

@CherryMalotte I might have half siblings out there. I know one. My birth mothers second child. I know who my birth father is, but since he’s been dead for over 20 years I don’t think it would be kind to let any of his children know I’m a blood member of their family. He wasn’t married when I was conceived. I understand how that news could give you anxiety and people do scam for money, housing etc. I also thought it was best just left alone although I’m curious. 

[SunnyBeBe]

Those situations are so tricky.  It's hard to know what is best. There are so many things to consider.  I know that my uncle's adult daughter, appeared out of no where when he was on his death bed. She had never met him and wanted to,  before he died.  (She did.)   I still don't know all the details, but, I think he knew about this child all along.  She was conceived and born DURING is marriage to his first wife. (He and that wife had 4 kids).  His first wife and children knew nothing of it. They did welcome her into the family.  (By this time, he had a second wife, adult children and grandchildren.)  The adult siblings were very open to it and entertained her in their homes. I actually met her at our Family Reunion!  She was quite pleasant, there with her husband and we exchanged contact information, as she lived about 6 states away from us. I could see the family resemblance and felt like I had known her for a long time.  I sent holiday cards for a couple of years, but, stopped when I stopped hearing anything from her.  I think she still stays in contact with her half siblings though. 

I know other people who have had not such good outcomes where the adult child approaches their father and he rejects them and has nothing to do with them, even though, he knew of them when they were growing up. It's heartbreaking.  

Edited February 11, 2020 by SunnyBeBe

[emma675]

I did a DNA test for the medical information side of it, although the ancestry side surprised me a bit (turns out I'm a smidge Native American, which I was not expecting). I never gave permission to have my results uploaded into any databases, though. I'm 99% sure I don't have any random relatives floating around out there (although my great grandmother was a bit of a wild child, so who knows), but I didn't want to deal with any of the mess that comes with that if it did happen. 

[CalicoKitty]

I was contacted by the daughter of my uncle's "unmentioned" son.  It always been a dark, deep family secret.  I was able to give her the family history of her father's family that she did not know, and would have had trouble finding, along with some photos of her grandfather.  She was thrilled, and I was happy to be able to help her out with her family tree.  I was happy to find out that her father had a very successful and happy life.

 

[realityfan26]

These stories about using handicapped stalls reminds me of a camping trip that my DH & I took to Zion National Park. We were car/tent cot camping so we didn’t have any room to change clothes. The first night I went over to the campground restrooms & managed to get myself changed in a regular stall. When I was finished I realized that not one person had even entered the restroom & this is a busy park! The rest of the time I happily used the handicapped stall. Most people camping had the RVs with bathrooms.

[Natalie68]

2 hours ago, CherryMalotte said:

My husband has a placard due to his RA - his meds have kept his flare ups under control for the most part but he still has them occasionally.  I have to admit that I use it when I've taken my dad for his groceries or to his VA visits.  He doesn't like to walk far and his balance isn't great - though this would improve if he'd walk a bit more and get some exercise as his doctor has said.  If it's just me I like to park out in the blue yonder because the walk is good for me.

While the dna testing can be a good thing - there is that downside as well.  I won't do it unless it involved my daughter for whatever medical reason.  A couple of years ago out of the blue I had a FB message, as did my daughter from a woman reaching out to us.  She stated that my grandfather was listed as her father on her birth certificate, she had a bit of info on him supposedly from her mother, and while she wasn't asking for anything in particular it spooked the hell out of me.  I blocked her without responding and my daughter did the same, and around the same time I had calls from a PA number which would have been the same area this woman lived in.  I don't know if it was somebody setting up an elaborate scam or just honestly reaching out but I really don't want to know.  It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if he'd gotten some woman knocked up as he was not faithful to my grandmother but at the same time he wasn't stupid and I'd think he'd have made sure that it wouldn't have happened.  My dad never mentioned anything to me, so I'm going to assume she never contacted him.  The whole incident creeped me out big time.

Anybody watching the Westminster Dog Show?  

I know 2 people who have found out they had siblings they didn't know they had and 1 who found out her dad isn't her bio dad (parents used a sperm donor), and 1 who had her bio daughter find her after putting her up for adoption.  The ones that found siblings were stoked, the 1 whose daughter found her was stoked, the 1 who found out her dad wasn't her dad is a more sad story.  The bio dad sold/donated sperm while in med school and wants nothing to do with my friend.  She thought she was Central American but nah, she is Central American and Ashkenazi Jewish.

[SunnyBeBe]

I gave my dad a DNA test as a gift  with Ancestry.com a couple of years ago. He loves history, family, etc.  We didn't do the medical part. I'm funny about stuff like that. Plus, my dad is 82.  lol  I didn't really realize that it was going to compare him with relatives either. I thought it would just give heritage info.  Immediately, he got a hit on an IMMEDIATE family member.    It was his sister, whom he grew up with. No surprises.  There were lots of other connections like distant cousins, but, we haven't contacted any of them yet.  

I might do it too. I think that I will be just like my dad.  He and I are spitting image, you might say. He was almost all Great Britain (England, Scotland Wales, Northern European) with ZERO Native American.  My dad has taken pride in the fact that he thought he had some Native American heritage. He believed his mother was part Cherokee.  Nope. None at all.  But, he didn't let that bother him. He believes it anyway! lol  

[Ijustwantsomechips]

Sounds to me like you used the placard correctly @Jeeves and I’m speaking as someone who konitors agencies for ADAAA compliance and provides reasonable accommodations.  It really is common courtesy to not use accessible stalls and parking spaces if you don’t particularly need them, especially when it is busy, but one cannot determine who does or does not need the accommodation or assistive technology based on looks alone.  Not only is it impossible to identify all disabilities by sight, it’s also problematic and can be discriminatory.  The disability may be auditory, traumatic brain injury, limited mobility, etc.  

Personally I hate when healthy people use all the spaces just to be close, but if they have a tag they haven’t broken the law because the tag goes with the vehicle as well as the person.  It’s really bad at my job but what can you do? We legally can’t say show me your disability so I know you can park here?

I’m off my soap box now.  Just thought I’d impart a little practical experience since I work with this daily.  Also, “handicap” is an antiquated term and the correct verbiage is person with disability.  

[SunnyBeBe]

Has anyone ever looked at an item online for a certain price one day and the next day, it's doubled? And, it wasn't a sale price either.  Man, that really annoys me.  I should have ordered it instead of waiting til morning.   And, it's taking a week to arrive!  I hope it's worth it.  I bought a print on line and am framing it myself.  I hope it turns out the way I want.  My mom sort of laughed at it.  lol  We don't share taste in some things.  If it doesn't look good, I'll just have to eat the cost. Now, I'm second guessing my choice. I wish I'd waited and gotten it framed before I showed it to her.  This is it. It's for a bathroom. I'm going for a spa theme.

https://www.art.com/products/p10426343221-sa-i5945031/amelie-vuillon-pile-with-olive-tree-branch.htm

[lookeyloo]

2 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Has anyone ever looked at an item online for a certain price one day and the next day, it's doubled? And, it wasn't a sale price either.  Man, that really annoys me.  I should have ordered it instead of waiting til morning.   And, it's taking a week to arrive!  I hope it's worth it.  I bought a print on line and am framing it myself.  I hope it turns out the way I want.  My mom sort of laughed at it.  lol  We don't share taste in some things.  If it doesn't look good, I'll just have to eat the cost. Now, I'm second guessing my choice. I wish I'd waited and gotten it framed before I showed it to her.  This is it. It's for a bathroom. I'm going for a spa theme.

https://www.art.com/products/p10426343221-sa-i5945031/amelie-vuillon-pile-with-olive-tree-branch.htm

Really pretty!!!

[SunnyBeBe]

56 minutes ago, lookeyloo said:

Really pretty!!!

Thanks. It appealed to me because, it has the bath elements. Plus, the peace symbol of an olive branch.    I'm going with some bamboo, rocks, natural type things. I found these little succulents at a great price and a tray on clearance.  Plus, I found a good sale on towels.  I found good deals all around really with some awesome Hemp with Tea Tree oil liquid soap and bath wash.  It's coming along. I love doing this sort of thing. I enjoy looking for deals. lol  ......when it's all done, I'm going to turn on my diffuser with some nice essential oil, run a hot bath, turn on some nice music, and soak with a nice glass of wine.  

Edited February 12, 2020 by SunnyBeBe

[ChiCricket]

 Hi everyone, I just got back from  sunny Puerto Rico, and it just started snowing here in illinois. I want to go back!  (not really!  home sweet home.)😁

Four of my five kids were there, and 10 of my grandkids! It was glorious CHAOS, and I am exhausted and  way beyond jet-lagged.

  But Ziva got Bat Mitzvahed (IS a Bat Mitzvah?) And she was beautiful and confident, and all of his family said she said everything flawlessly.

She could have messed up every word, and I would have been none the wiser, I don't understand any of it. All sounded very impressive to me.

I'm so shy that if I  had grown up Jewish, there is NO way I could ever stand up and do all that in front of all those people!! I would have joined the circus or hopped a freight train first (seriously.)

I *did* remember that the prayer book's pages turn backward from my granddaughter Ahava's Bat Mitzvah, so I didn't get quite so lost. But it was LONG, because it was in English, Hebrew, AND Spanish . 

    Ok..enough blabbing..for now 😁

Ps here's a picture of my granddoggy Nala on my husband's family farm, with a coconut from their tree. (She travels everywhere with them, has even lived with them on  their boats)

 

 

 

Edited February 13, 2020 by ChiCricket
Nala pic

[lookeyloo]

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Thanks. It appealed to me because, it has the bath elements. Plus, the peace symbol of an olive branch.    I'm going with some bamboo, rocks, natural type things. I found these little succulents at a great price and a tray on clearance.  Plus, I found a good sale on towels.  I found good deals all around really with some awesome Hemp with Tea Tree oil liquid soap and bath wash.  It's coming along. I love doing this sort of thing. I enjoy looking for deals. lol  ......when it's all done, I'm going to turn on my diffuser with some nice essential oil, run a hot bath, turn on some nice music, and soak with a nice glass of wine.  

That sounds amazingly wonderful!!

[lookeyloo]

12 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

 Hi everyone, I just got back from  sunny Puerto Rico, and it just started snowing here in illinois.I   want to go back!  (not really, home sweet home.)😁

Four of my five kids were there, and 10 of my grandkids! It was glorious CHAOS, and I am exhausted and  way beyond jet-lagged.

  But Ziva got Bat Mitzvahed (IS a Bat Mitzvah?) And she was beautiful and confident, and all of his family said she said everything flawlessly.

She could have messed up every word, and I would have been none the wiser, I don't understand any of it. All sounded very impressive to me.

I'm so shy that if I  had grown up Jewish, there is NO way I could ever stand up and do all that in front of all those people!! I would have joined the circus or hopped a freight train first (seriously.)

I *did* remember that the prayer book's pages turn backward from my granddaughter Ahava's Bat Mitzvah, so I didn't get quite so lost. But it was LONG, because it was in English, Hewbrew, AND Spanish . 

    Ok..enough blabbing..for now 😁

Ps here's a picture of my granddoggy Nala on my husband's family farm, with a coconut from their tree. (She travels everywhere with them, has even lived with them on  their boats)

 

 

 

That is a beautiful dog!  We had a German Shepherd from a baby to over 13 years old. He was the child Mr. lookeyloo and I didn't have.  We loved him and he was a great dog.  We still cry when we think of him. 

I know what you mean about she could have messed up every word.  Our oldest grandson had a splendid Bar Mitzvah.  I couldn't have been more proud of him.  After, he said, well I messed up a few words. I said, who knew?  He was confident and wonderful.  The granddaughter bailed on the Bat Mitzvah. I don't know why her parents let her.  But, the baby grandson who will be 12 in March got his Bar Mitzvah date for 2020 and he will be splendid too.  Even if he messes up the words, haha.

Thanks for sharing the stories.  

[galaxychaser]

I must be the only one who hates baths. 

[BetyBee]

6 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Has anyone ever looked at an item online for a certain price one day and the next day, it's doubled? And, it wasn't a sale price either.  Man, that really annoys me.  I should have ordered it instead of waiting til morning.   And, it's taking a week to arrive!  I hope it's worth it.  I bought a print on line and am framing it myself.  I hope it turns out the way I want.  My mom sort of laughed at it.  lol  We don't share taste in some things.  If it doesn't look good, I'll just have to eat the cost. Now, I'm second guessing my choice. I wish I'd waited and gotten it framed before I showed it to her.  This is it. It's for a bathroom. I'm going for a spa theme.

https://www.art.com/products/p10426343221-sa-i5945031/amelie-vuillon-pile-with-olive-tree-branch.htm

I don't know if it's true, but I've heard that clearing your cache and then looking up an item you're interested in, can affect the price. So that it looks like you're looking at it for the first time, rather than you're someone they've got on the line.  Someone told me that about Expedia.

[Temperance]

@ChiCricket How are the conditions in Puerto Rico?

[ChiCricket]

2 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

I must be the only one who hates baths. 

Wait until you're old and creaky. I used to hate baths too when I was younger...

 The one thing I was looking forward to was getting back to my bathtub and soaking my aching bones in a hot bath. 😁

PS I have never seen a bathtub in Puerto Rico anywhere in all the years I've visited there....AND you are lucky if you get warmish water, much less HOT.

(yes, I am spoiled rotten)

 

Edited February 13, 2020 by ChiCricket

[ChiCricket]

1 hour ago, Temperance said:

@ChiCricket How are the conditions in Puerto Rico?

It was OK where I was for the Bat Mitzvah, because that was held in Rincón, which is a beach town, and tourists go there, and so they get repaired first, I guess.

 But when we went up in the mountains where my husband's family lives, there are still (lesser) roads washed out (like,only down to one lane wide, so one or two cars could only go through from one direction, and then a couple of cars would come through from the opposite direction.) These roads are on the side of a mountain, and there is no way to ' just go around it' on a different road...there is no other road. I closed my eyes a LOT. I'm so glad I wasn't the one driving (or even worse, my old geezer husband!) 😆

It made for very slow going. Even some bigger streets have way more and much BIGGER potholes than I've ever seen there in all the years I've gone there.

  Along the main highways, all of the electricity seems to be repaired and all looks new.  (Of course I didn't travel EVERY road.) Just what I personally saw.

BUT when you get into the little barrios (neighborhoods) out in the country where my husband grew up, a lot of stuff still seems to be jerry-rigged (shoot..now I'm not sure if that's an outdated or offensive term, if so, I'm sorry..I don't know how else to describe it? Is it?)  Do youngens (😂) even know the term jerry-rigged? (Going to look it up now, I'll be back to edit, maybe)

   But, on the highways, there are HUGE, TALL substantial looking concrete poles holding up the power lines, but once you get farther in, you see all the old rickety wooden poles, or really beat up, pock-marked cement(?) poles, that look like the next big wind will knock them over (again.) They look like Columbus brought them over.

THOSE poles still have crazy amounts of weird differing sizes and types of wires on them going in all directions, some of them all bunched up. 

I know for a fact that one of my brothers-in-law got tired of waiting for electricity (for maybe almost a year? I have a BAD memory) and finally just got some friends to help him hook up his house to the main power pole. (they're lucky they weren't electrocuted.)

It's all so hard to describe...it's just..not anywhere near normal yet..kwim? I do think the tourist areas are getting fixed up faster. (I mean...I can see WHY..they depend on tourism, but at the same time,  everything else needs fixing too.)

  I did ask my sister in law, Minerva "where are all the kids?!" It was unusually quiet. Usually you heard kids, and chickens and dogs all over the place. Now it's TOO quiet (the coqui 's still sing at night though)😊

She said almost everyone with kids (in their neighborhood) moved to the mainland after the double whammies of the tornado and the earthquakes. Plus, people used to have huge families (my husband was one of thirteen) and now none of us know anyone who has had more than three (most of his siblings have only two..we are the weirdos of the family now with five (wouldn't trade a one.)

  They have closed down the school my husband went to, because it was so damaged, and there weren't enough kids still around to make repairing it feasible. Now the kids remaining have a long bus ride into town on twisty mountain roads. Coupled with that hardship, and the fact that the coffee crop was so damaged (and employed so many people) and people just went where there are jobs and accessible schools. I'm sure they're planning to go back to Puerto Rico someday (just like my husband did, 50 years ago, now he couldn't wait to come back to Illinois.)

Ugh, I'm rambling! Please bear with me, it takes me awhile to get over a trip... I'm a boomer😂

PS I was nowhere near where the earthquakes occurred, so I don't know anything about THAT damage. My husband's family did say they felt them all the way up in Lares, and it was creepy, and unsettling.

PPS (to make my post even LONGER)😜

"Jury-rigged means something was assembled quickly with the materials on hand. Jerry-built means it was cheaply or poorly built. Jerry-rigged is a variant of jury-rigged, and it may have been influenced by  jerry-built. While some people consider it to be an incorrect version of jury-rigged, it’s widely used, especially in everyday speech."

"Is the jerry in jerry-built or jerry-rigged offensive?

It’s sometimes thought that the jerry in jerry-built or jerry-rigged comes from Jerry as used as British slur against Germans during Word War I and II. This disparaging term is real, a pun on the name Jerry and the pronunciation of the first part of German. This insult, however, is found by 1915, which is sometime after we first find evidence for jerry-built and jerry-rigged in the 19th century."

::::whew:::::: I'm German, so I guess I can use it 😁

Edited February 13, 2020 by ChiCricket

[Jynnan tonnix]

Brought over from, I think it was the J's thread....

  8 hours ago, Gemma Violet said:

Quote

Yes, I learned it over a decade ago as well.  As was mentioned, it's "a child with autism," not "an autistic child," and it's "a child with special needs," not "a special needs child."  

 

I was reading an article recently, though, which mentioned that people with autism (and presumably those with other issues) are somewhat split on their preferred wording. Some feel, as has been mentioned that "people with autism" brings them as people to the forefront, and the autism secondary, but there are others who prefer to be called "autistic", as they see the autism as an inherent part of what makes them them. I don't remember the reasoning, exactly, but they embraced the label. 

Sorry this is off topic, Going to move it to the prayer closet as well. This is an interesting side-discussion, and I'd hate to see it lost.

[Ohiopirate02]

1 hour ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Brought over from, I think it was the J's thread....

  8 hours ago, Gemma Violet said:

 

I was reading an article recently, though, which mentioned that people with autism (and presumably those with other issues) are somewhat split on their preferred wording. Some feel, as has been mentioned that "people with autism" brings them as people to the forefront, and the autism secondary, but there are others who prefer to be called "autistic", as they see the autism as an inherent part of what makes them them. I don't remember the reasoning, exactly, but they embraced the label. 

Sorry this is off topic, Going to move it to the prayer closet as well. This is an interesting side-discussion, and I'd hate to see it lost.

I try to use person-first language when discussing people with disabilities while respecting the way a person chooses to identify.  From what I can gather from various people on the internet, there is a subsection of people with autism or who are neuro-atypical who want to normalize it.  Their stance is "my brain works differently than yours, so what, I can live a happy and productive life with my diagnosis, I am not less than you, etc."  Which is a direct response to some national organizations like Autism Speaks and the anti-vaxxers who would rather have a child dead from measles than a living child with autism.  

[galaxychaser]

I am weird. I don’t like alcohol or smoking and never wanted to try weed or any drug. I’m a strange bird.

And I gave up soda. Now all I want is water. 

[crazycatlady58]

1 hour ago, galaxychaser said:

I am weird. I don’t like alcohol or smoking and never wanted to try weed or any drug. I’m a strange bird.

And I gave up soda. Now all I want is water. 

I wish I could give up Cokes.  Drink very little, I have a pint of Jack Daniel in my fridge for 3 months and it is still half full.

[Love2dance]

On 2/12/2020 at 10:36 AM, SunnyBeBe said:

Has anyone ever looked at an item online for a certain price one day and the next day, it's doubled? And, it wasn't a sale price either.  Man, that really annoys me.  I should have ordered it instead of waiting til morning.   And, it's taking a week to arrive!  I hope it's worth it.  I bought a print on line and am framing it myself.  I hope it turns out the way I want.  My mom sort of laughed at it.  lol  We don't share taste in some things.  If it doesn't look good, I'll just have to eat the cost. Now, I'm second guessing my choice. I wish I'd waited and gotten it framed before I showed it to her.  This is it. It's for a bathroom. I'm going for a spa theme.

https://www.art.com/products/p10426343221-sa-i5945031/amelie-vuillon-pile-with-olive-tree-branch.htm

I think it’s lovely and will be perfect in your bathroom. 

[SunnyBeBe]

48 minutes ago, Love2dance said:

I think it’s lovely and will be perfect in your bathroom. 

Thanks. I do too.  It JUST arrived and I put it in the frame I bought.  It looks great and I can't wait to hang it up and get the decor items assembled.  Maybe, I'll post a pic after I get it all set up.

[ChiCricket]

I was thinking that I probably made my trip sound like all sunshine and lollipops, but I want to be honest..most of it was a choatic nightmare. 😭 right now I haven't talked to my husband and one of my daughters for the last few days (outside of necessary conversation), because I am SO mad at  how they treated me on this trip.

::::Here I had a HUGE, off the rails rant..be glad I deleted it:::: 😜

Now to close out my complaining with a picture of my granddaughter Ziva at her Bat Mitzvah..and remind myself I have a LOT to be very thankful for.

(That is the actual ocean, and not a backdrop..drop dead beautiful)

(thanks for letting me vent)

 

Edited February 14, 2020 by ChiCricket
all out of system now and totally deleted 😊

[galaxychaser]

I got a letter today saying my therapist left the practice. You’d think she would have at least texted/called to let me know. My nosy self wants to know if she quit or got fired...

[DangerousMinds]

2 minutes ago, galaxychaser said:

I got a letter today saying my therapist left the practice. You’d think she would have at least texted/called to let me know. My nosy self wants to know if she quit or got fired...

My psychiatrist of many years lost her license a few months ago, and I got a letter like that too.

[galaxychaser]

1 hour ago, ChiCricket said:

I was thinking that I probably made my trip sound like all sunshine and lollipops, but I want to be honest..most of it was a choatic nightmare. 😭 right now I haven't talked to my husband and one of my daughters for the last few days (outside of necessary conversation), because I am SO mad at  how they treated me on this trip.

::::Here I had a HUGE, off the rails rant..be glad I deleted it:::: 😜

Now to close out my complaining with a picture of my granddaughter Ziva at her Bat Mitzvah..and remind myself I have a LOT to be very thankful for.

(That is the actual ocean, and not a backdrop..drop dead beautiful)

(thanks for letting me vent)

 

I’m sorry hope you guys patch things up soon. 

3 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

My psychiatrist of many years lost her license a few months ago, and I got a letter like that too.

Therapists can lose their license? (Stupid question). 

[ChiCricket]

23 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

My psychiatrist of many years lost her license a few months ago, and I got a letter like that too.

  Mine lost his license about a year ago...I found out he had gotten in trouble for over prescribing controlled substances (like Xanax.) The only way I found out the reason is that my SIL is a doctor, and "knows people who were in the know" 😜

 They must be cracking down on that. It really was a major pita to find a new one who actually took my insurance, wasn't a really far distance away, and had decent online reviews. (I hate having to go to new doctors of any kind.)

I don't even use controlled substances...I just take anti-depression meds, but my regular GP didn't want to give me refills when my doctor lost his license.😕

Edited February 15, 2020 by ChiCricket