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S05.E01: Old Testaments, New Revelations

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Gizelle rekindles her relationship with ex-husband and pastor Jamal Bryant, but her daughters aren’t as supportive of their re-union. Ashley struggles to adjust to life as a new mom. Meanwhile, Monique introduces her new parrot-child, T’Challa, to Potomac. Candiace and Chris celebrate their one-year anniversary with a diamond themed party, but the festivities quickly come to a halt when Gizelle confronts Candiace and Monique encounters an old frenemy.

Airs August 2, 2020.

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No matter what he says, Robin, Juan doesn't want to marry you.  I've been more excited about getting a root canal.

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Good to see the ladies back! Fun! I like Robyn's two-tone hair, but not in her talking heads.

Monique's bird thing is strange to me, but hey, if she's into it, then great. Gizelle' s conversation with her daughters made me sad. It's one thing to forgive Jamal; it's another thing to get back together with him. I agree with the girls; this isn't a good look.

Literally groaned when Candiace showed up on screen, with her "low-key" one-year anniversary celebration. I'm glad she's pushing back against Gizelle, however immaturely.

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Glad Karen moved back to Potomac.  It’s nice that more than one woman lives in the locale for which the franchise was named.

Gizelle is looking a bit rough.  Her story is that her best friend’s husband Niles asked her if there’s anyone she wants to travel with more than Jamal, she said no, so Niles told her to “fix it” and she did?  Where does “cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater” come into the mix?  She didn’t seem to have an answer for that.  I think it’s a money thing.  If her ex-husband was poor, or if Sherman was still sniffing around, it would be “Jamal who”?  If Gizelle is going to get Candiace together, I’m for her in that regard.  

Candiace is just as much of a pinhead as ever.  She’s still touching her hair and treating life like a pageant play.  The only worthy contribution she made to the entire episode was that Gizelle should wear a condom with Jamal.  Oh, and calling Gizelle’s new home a $900,00 tear-down cabin is the reason I watch this show.  

So Dean is two months old, and Ashley gave birth to him in early July 2019.  Glad we’re seeing events that unfolded eleven months ago.  Why do they always start filming this franchise as soon as the reunion is over and then hold onto the footage forever?  It’s interesting to see Ashley as a mom though regardless.  She seems more grounded now.  

Wow, Robyn and Juan are still awkward as hell around each other, with him evading her about marriage.  Five seasons in and absolutely nothing has changed with these two.  I think they’re fools—he’s the original fool, and she’s a fool because she’s an otherwise smart, assertive woman who lets a man walk all over her and it’s setting a horrible example for their kids.  All he has to do is smile and she becomes complacent.  It actually makes me sick.  He looked like an unshowered lumberjack at Candiace’s thing.  

I like to see Ashley and Monique raising their babies together.  It’s more interesting and organic than that bird.  My hat’s off to Monique for potty training her child early.  It looks like Monique and Ashley are going to team up against Candiace.  As I live and breathe.  

On one hand, I’m embarrassed that Candiace felt the need to throw such an over the top one year wedding anniversary with a cash bar.  Face palm.  Hard.  That’s not a party, that’s happy hour.    

On the other hand, I’m living for the season starting off with an event and the new cast member coming into the mix immediately.  Also, no tag lines.  Maybe that’s the start of a new thing with Bravo.  I hate tag lines.  They’re so hokey and they lend no information about the characters or the narrative.  We all know Gizelle think she’s the word on the street, and very few people care!

So Karen is not impressed with Wendy?  The plot thickens.  

Karen is one of Candiace’s two favorite people in the world, and the other one is not Chris?  Yeah, I believe that.  Aw, Karen, your marriage isn’t perfect?  I thought it was an institution.  

Candiace is still crying at the drop of a hat and holding stiff napkins directly up to her eyeballs to dry her tears?  Has she not watched herself at all these past two seasons?  She has not exhibited one iota of self-awareness or growth in her third season.  This was a pretty solid opener, but I think this show would do better without Candiace.  There’s nothing redeeming about her.  

 

 

 

Edited by LibertarianSlut · Reason: Typos
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Gizelle

When your kids are iffy on you getting back together with their father, please take heed.  Also, didn't he have another baby a couple of months ago? 

Gizelle may have a $900K teardown but Candiace still doesn't have her own house, so......

Are white appliances supposed to be bad? A lot of people do not like black or stainless steel.  I saw social media commentary slamming Gizelle for having white appliances.

Side note: whether Gizelle is a "black woman" or not, her daughters definitely are and therefore she has a vested interest in "black women." (Same goes for Robyn & her children)

Ashley

Ashley's going to get on my nerves this season with her essential oils BS.  If she was paranoid during taping last summer I know she's paranoid now with Rona running around.

Karen

I don't know what was up with Karen's Kris Jenner wig but she didn't need to be spilling her own tea about Ray at somebody else's anniversary party.  Sounds like her new Potomac house is on the smaller side, which is fine; it's just her and Ray.

Speaking of her and Ray, Karen is still active in her 50s (as Ray was active in his 50s) but now that Ray is in his 70s, he just wants to rest while she still wants to be on the go.  It's only going to get worse as they get older so they need to talk about it now.  Ashley and Michael will have the same problem in 20 years.

Candiace

Candiace's reckless mouth is what gets her in trouble again and again and again.  Looks like Monique rocked her world later on this season.  I don't know why she's calling Ashley a bedwench and concubine when the same could be said about her.

A one year anniversary is acceptable if you are a 2020 bride who has had to cancel everything due to coronavirus and you get married in 2020 but have a reception in 2021.  Candiace & Chris having some $150,000 wedding, then having a 1 year anniversary party ...WHY???? A cash bar? WHY????

And Candiace's momma needs to stop running her mouth about Candiace to these women.

Charisse

I don't know if Charisse is trying to worm her way back on the show via Candiace or if Candiace is forming an alliance with Candiace against Monique.  I do know Charisse didn't appreciate Monique using her to get on with the Potomac social scene.

 

 

 

Edited by drivethroo
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Also a 1 year anniversary party is stupid lol.

I like the episode. One episode of Potomac is already better than all of RHOBHs last 2 seasons combined.

Gizelle is getting back with Jamal cause of money I’m sure. She doesn’t wanna be alone either, but if he was poor she wouldn’t be getting back with him. One of them will have to eventually move won’t they?

I feel like Karen’s marriage problems are all just for a SL and her and Ray came up with it together but we shall see I guess.

I felt like Gizelle was waiting for that Wendy chick to say she got with Jamal lol.

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I have to give it to Candyass.  She’s up against Kim Z, Nene, Vicki, and so many more, and yet, I find her the most loathsome.

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Dang, thought this was coming on Wednesday for some reason.

Trying to watch via On Demand now....why in the bluedilly hell does this stupid screen keep slowing down?!

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I thought Monique’s bird was weird at first until I saw him potty-training.  That was cute.  Teach him to say shady things and he will become my new favorite cast member.

Cake tasting made me hungry.

Robyn is as gorgeous and pathetic as ever.  Dump that shady dude already!

Um was Ashley’s baby producing runny orange poop?? Is that normal or do I need to get my TV fixed?

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Juan still never said when they’re getting married. Robin will be happy with his response until more time goes by and it dawns on her that he’s still not making any moves. Wash, rinse, repeat. Why does she do this to herself?

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7 minutes ago, For Cereals said:

So blingy = tacky?  Did Gizelle’s taste stop in the 90s?  She should’ve hired a designer.

Her aesthetic is very ‘cheesy porno set’ to me.

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2 seasons ago, Michael was possibly cheating, last year Michael may have been involved in a sexual assault, this year he may have been cheating.  They need a new storyline.  Who would want to cheat with Michael?  Eww.

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25 minutes ago, Axie said:

2 seasons ago, Michael was possibly cheating, last year Michael may have been involved in a sexual assault, this year he may have been cheating.  They need a new storyline.  Who would want to cheat with Michael?  Eww.

Women like Ashley who find his money adorable 😉

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1.  Interesting potty-training technique.  I hope it works for them.  [My kid is old so I don't follow the latest on this]

2.  I've never heard of a one-year anniversary party and a poster upthread thought it would be a good idea if you had a small wedding this year.  I agree.  Cash bar?  NO.  Just NO.  Offer Prosecco, wine and beer.  Cash bar for those who want to do tequila shots (but likely a different RH franchise).

3.  I really don't know what to think about all of the but grabbing accusations last year aimed at Michael--they were probably true but what do I know?  This episode?  I saw lots of but grabbing.  I'd have to go back and look but I think Candace was one of the perps.  She wasn't the only one.  Hmmm.  How does that work?

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5 hours ago, Yogisbooboo64 said:

Dang, thought this was coming on Wednesday for some reason.

Trying to watch via On Demand now....why in the bluedilly hell does this stupid screen keep slowing down?!

I missed the episode live. Glad to know On Demand is ~available, thanks! Trying to restrain myself from liking comments until I can watch--- sounds like some good ones!

Here's a good recap for those of us who missed it with lots of pictures:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-8586827/Real-Housewives-Potomac-Season-5-premiere-teases-explosive-drama.html

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7 hours ago, StillHere said:

Shut up about "black women", Gizelle. You're barely Black.
Tacky ass bint.

What is “barely black?” 

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5 hours ago, For Cereals said:

So blingy = tacky?  Did Gizelle’s taste stop in the 90s?  She should’ve hired a designer.

Also, both Gizelle and Robyn are black.  Not Rachel Dolezol black, but black black.  We come in many shades and varieties...

Ok!! ‘Cause I’m thoroughly confused.  

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7 hours ago, Marley said:

Also a 1 year anniversary party is stupid lol.

It is stupid especially when you are strapped for cash!  

$22,000 F&B minimum is a lot of money, why not have it on a Thursday night, I bet the venue would be more willing to work with them on that minimum, also, it is so stupid. 

I liked the look of the outside of Gizelle's house a lot, modern farmhouse is trending but the inside has lost me.  Her kids could have been replaced by mannequins.

Karen is taking a page from NeNe's book about how she is getting so successful and her husband is sooo old, they are growing apart...has anyone seen Grand Dame in a store?  She irks me still because she and her sister released balloons (in memory of her parents, were they super in to balloons?) and those balloons wreak havoc on the environment.  Karen moved to yet a different house, again. Shocker.

Every time Ashley does something baby related she says to Michael, "Did you ever think you would see me..." I bet he never gave it a thought prior to this child.

 

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Ok Monique and Chris make some incredibly cute kids. Baby Chase is adorable! 
 

Baby Dean really does look just like a miniature Michael. I wonder how long Ashley will stick with him (big Mike) now that she has what she wanted. I give it another year or so. 
 

Candiace is just the worst. Tacky and mean as ever. That upcoming fight looks insane. Looks like Monique does, indeed, drag her.

New housewife seems like .. a lot. Did she say she had a 7 week old baby at home?? 

Gizelle’s terrible taste in men continues. Her daughters are only tweens/teens but they already have better sense than her when it comes to relationships. If your kids aren’t happy that you’re getting back together with their dad, yeah something is way off. 
 

8 hours ago, StillHere said:

Shut up about "black women", Gizelle. You're barely Black.
Tacky ass bint.

yikes. 

Edited by Duke2801
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9 hours ago, Bronzedog said:

Where's the party?  National Harbor?

It was at the Wharf-La Vie. I think it is one of the most expensive restaurants down there. I went there once for the World Central Kitchen fundraiser Dine & Dash (highly recommend for any DC folks after the pandemic). You know what it didn't have? A cash bar. She SUCKS. All of her twitter replies back to people are about how they are poor. Lady, I probably have the same amount of money as you. Also I cannot find Chris's name anywhere on the Myron Mixon's Pitmaster BBQ website so please. (I do hope it survives the pandemic, even if the food is slightly mediocre)

Gizelle's house-woof. Her style is a little heavy, but I never notice it because she is the one of most beautiful housewives. Too much purple!

I will always cheer for Robyn and Juan, just because of the UMD championship in 2002. 

Spoiler

Gizelle spoiled that Robyn has a ring in WWHL and Andy looked less than happy. I know it is a story line (he meets with Gizelle to talk about proposing but she leads us to think it is shady), but it was in a lot of open press. And by open press, I mean the many FB Bravo groups I'm in. 

 

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10 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Its a cash bar! lol

I wonder if Bravo paid for part of her party ? Their budget was $5K, but the venue's minimum cost was $22K.

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On the one hand a one year anniversary party is ridiculous.

On the other hand the odds of them making it beyond year 5 would be a miracle, so, make hay while the sun shines I guess.....

Edited by bosawks
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43 minutes ago, oakville said:

I wonder if Bravo paid for part of her party ? Their budget was $5K, but the venue's minimum cost was $22K.

If your budget is only 5K then you need to have that party at your mamas house that you are living in .... Candice just tries to hard .. Girl if you are saying you are poor you don't throw yourself a one year anniversary party with money you don't have ...

Edited by Keywestclubkid
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Welcome back !!! Good premiere. 

I really love the first part of the episode when its just their family/immediate circle. Things tend to go all cray-cray when 2+ more ladies get together.

I didn't know to feel  for Gizelle's daughters - part of me thought they would be happy... another part of me thought they would just go on about their teenage life  (ie more concerned about their lives than their parents).  Gizelle didn't seem to address how they are going to move forward as a couple when he is in ATL (ie man-to-women ratio probably in the double digits) and she is there...

And please stop with the NewBirth (which I thought was copyrighted ) gear. 

Edited by sATL
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I did enjoy everybody being rude as hell about the Gizelle/Jamal thing because I think they all know it's a relationship just for storyline. Also, if Candiace needs to learn origami if she keeps insisting on folding a napkin and crying every episode.

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Well, you guys have said it all. Candace is the worst and I really do not want to see her on my screen again after this season.  She thinks she's a princess but she is rude and tacky as all fuck. If any of those other women had a cash bar she would be talking mad shit. Like Gizelle said, if you have to have a cash bar you shouldn't be having a party.

Of course the new lady is besties with Candace. Based on the previews I don't think I'm going to like her at all.

Karen's speech at the party was embarrassing. Agree with poster who said she's probably doing it all for a story line. Not cool.

I like Gizelle, but have never been a fan of her clothes and now the interior of her house is added to the NO list. And when your daughters are not pleased with the reunification of their parents, there's a big problem.

Robin is an idiot. He will cheat again.

Nice to see Monique and Ashley bond together as mums. Don't know about that parrot, but whatever. 

Glad the girls (minus Candace) are back.

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Love that Gizelle's kids have Jamal's number. They definitely put his ass on blast with the "he only calls us so that he can call you to tell you he called us. Plus he's a cheater!"  They were like:

tenor.gif

When will Robyn learn?

The producers: When are you and Juan getting married?

Me (and Juan): giphy.gif

 

Candiace knows she can't afford shit without her mama.  And as much as I can't stand her mom, I certainly did chuckle a lot when mom tried to stifle her laugh about the cash bar.  

9 hours ago, For Cereals said:

Also, both Gizelle and Robyn are black.  Not Rachel Dolezol black, but black black.  We come in many shades and varieties...

Thank you for stating what shouldn't need to be said.  

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9 hours ago, For Cereals said:

So blingy = tacky?  Did Gizelle’s taste stop in the 90s?  She should’ve hired a designer.

Also, both Gizelle and Robyn are black.  Not Rachel Dolezol black, but black black.  We come in many shades and varieties...

This. THIS. My daddy was afro boricua, my mommie was as well. She was just more "light passing". I am afro boricua and i am light as hell. I also am 45 and look younger than a whole bunch of broads so I know my melanin quota is good. This cast is the most gorgeous of all them. We should put Cynthia, Garcelle, Maybe Erica Jayne, Luanne on a survivor island with them.  I find this cast and the those other 4 housewives from different franchises, the most naturally beautiful. i would love to see them lose the ridiculous trendy glam for five mins tho hence survivor island lol. 

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12 hours ago, Keywestclubkid said:

oh god now rays age is a problem for Karen??

Or it could be Karen's age is now a problem for Ray.

I've seen what Karen is describing in coworkers. When some get to a certain age (or point in their career), they lose ambition. They just want to be.. Not saying they are ready for a rocker, awaiting for God to call them home, but just don't want to run the same fast-track race they did - for some as far back as when they were teens.

Ray just wants to do what he wants, when he wants, which could be nothing.  Karen has found her 2nd-3rd wind and wants ( and possibly need) to keep going, pressing and making waves and news.

Also - I don't know what was the final outcome of the tax mess his company was in. Ray could be just want to lay low, as he could have been asked to retire, couldn't pass his title down to his son, and/ or not be as visible as he once was. That can cause one to go into a minor depression.

Edited by sATL
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 He looked like an unshowered lumberjack at Candiace’s thing.  

Yesss! Why do men do this on these shows? It's a semi-formal event, why are you showing up like you're making a quick run to Home Depot? Robyn is dressed up and he looks like that? Men really have no excuse. Button down, blazer, nice jeans. That's it! But it's just a long list of ways Juan continues to show Robyn that he doesn't give a fuck. She's just happy that he showed up.

I missed last season, but I'm going to jump back into this one. Nice to see that Gizelle's tackiness hasn't abated. But you know you can't tell her shit about it. 

Look, I've heard that the first year of marriage is the hardest, but having an expensive party, especially when you don't have the funds, is not the move, Candiace. It would be one thing if she and Chris could afford it, but we all know that's not the case. First year anniversary celebrations should be a nice dinner or a weekend trip. Not fronting at pricey restaurants with a :shudder: cash bar. 

That being said, Candiace really drew the short straw with mothers. Those two need family therapy, but I don't know if it'll be helpful because her mother is a narcissist. 

11 hours ago, drivethroo said:

Are white appliances supposed to be bad? A lot of people do not like black or stainless steel.  I saw social media commentary slamming Gizelle for having white appliances.

I'd like to know the answer to this as well. Is it because it looks basic, or it gets dirty quickly? I remember NeNe going in on someone having a white fridge seasons ago. Never knew what the deal was about white appliances. 

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What ever happened to living within your means? Karen keeps moving in to different McMansions each season, why not just move in to a stylish town home community and stick with it?  Ray is depressed because Karen is renting and spending money needlessly, Ray is watching from the sidelines while Karen fronts all the while they are not sound financially so Ray is not "feeling" Karen these days. 

The anniversary party confused me, I know that Bravo probably paid for it but when they went to look at the space (on line there is no cherry blossom decor, fyi) the sales manager told them it was a $22,000 F&B budget for that space so why is there a cash bar and minimal food?  

Candiace's mother, OMG what is wrong with that woman?

I think Robin is really beautiful, why did she use Dorit's misguided glam squad's mish mosh hair pins?

Monique is potty training herself, lugging around a potty is a bit much but then again she is also trying to potty train a bird, I am pretty sure she may be a control freak.

 

 

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Confession. I dislike Ashley more than all of you disliking Candace.  There.  I said it.

Not that I like Candace.  But Ashley is much higher on my side eye scale.

And I don't want to spend an entire season watching her lie about her husband's roving hand problem and pretend it never happened and act like Candace made it all up.

The first time T'Challa poops on the shoulder of an expensive blouse, potty trained or not?  Will not be the first.  She's also appears to be creating a situation where the bird is only bonding with her--thats not good. 

This is the one housewife show where I don't have a favorite housewife.  It should be Candace, based on all the grief she's given Ashley, who in turn, used to cause the most grief.  But its Candace so..... 

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For some reason I thought Juan proposed in last seasons finale. It was so long ago. Maybe he agreed to just talk about. Sometimes I think I’m losing my mind lol. Anywho glad Juan is still around because I find him very attractive lol.

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14 minutes ago, Marley said:

For some reason I thought Juan proposed in last seasons finale. It was so long ago. Maybe he agreed to just talk about. Sometimes I think I’m losing my mind lol. Anywho glad Juan is still around because I find him very attractive lol.

I thought so too, but I think it was just that he "committed" to getting a [very, very tiny] matching tattoo on his ring finger.

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQvFIv1R2KlLw4SjI-BYP-

Edited by luckyroll3
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31 minutes ago, Marley said:

For some reason I thought Juan proposed in last seasons finale. It was so long ago. Maybe he agreed to just talk about. Sometimes I think I’m losing my mind lol. Anywho glad Juan is still around because I find him very attractive lol.

Eh, for some reason I convinced myself Robin was / is pregnant.  She’s not, but for some reason I thought that was the off season news.   Ugh it’s just so much time between seasons!

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