S12.E07: Madonna: The Unauthorized Rusical

[OnceSane]

Quote

The queens get into the groove in a Queen of Pop inspired musical. U.S. Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and supermodel Winnie Harlow guest judge.

Airs April 10, 2020.

[Keywestclubkid]

Not gonna say I’m sad to see Britta go ... but 

[CraftyHazel]

Poor Jan.  She nailed it in every way and still got nothing.  She needs to change her name to Serta.

Glad to see Crystal in the top group, and super glad to see the last of Brita and her oversized mouth.

[Stardancer Supreme]

Now this Madonna Rusical I could get behind. I enjoyed it just as much as the Michelle Visage runway.

Thanks be to Heidi for getting rid of Open Mouth Brita! "Burning Up" is one of my favorite Madonna songs and I would have been salty if Ru kept OMB with that  not so great lipsync! 

Are the producers trying to turn this into a Jan/Gigi fight to the crown?  Honestly, I would be hot as fish grease, too!  Jan should have won that challenge.

I loved Jaida's Justify My Love part.  I didn't love the breastplate showing in the Michelle look. That broke the illusion!

[Keywestclubkid]

18 minutes ago, Marmiarmo said:

Poor Jan.  She nailed it in every way and still got nothing.  She needs to change her name to Serta.

Lol I feel so bad for Jan she really tries and is on point and prepared but something’s not clicking with her and the judges ... but the way they said she was safe was shaaade 

Edited April 11, 2020 by Keywestclubkid

[Adeejay]

Jan wuz robbed!  

[rlc]

Ding dong, the Brita’s gone.

Speaking as a NYer, you don’t represent me. Buh bye.

[latincoffee]

So happy with this episode!! Heidi keep shining boo! 

Brita---karma gave you a taste of your own nasty medicine! Aiden is somewhere getting her life! "You Brita Be Gone!!"

Edited April 11, 2020 by latincoffee

[heckkitty]

Oh yeah, Jan got robbed, bad. 

[Sew Sumi]

What does Jan have to do to get a win? 

[cpcathy]

Which Madonna was Heidi supposed to be?

[Blissfool]

2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

What does Jan have to do to get a win? 

Change her name to Marcia. 

 

Sorry...I'll let myself out.

[Fake Jan Brady]

Where oh where is the gif of Jan hearing she’s safe?

I appreciated Gigi’s stealth attack on the challenge to Jan over praising herself before it had even started. Overconfidence is tricky, gurl, just look what happened to your good friend Brita.

Looks like Widow is claiming the villain spot now. 

AOC in Untucked was heaven. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

I know we all have our burdens to bear, but man, listening to Crystal about her dad's Parksinson's just broke my heart. It was nice to hear that her parents have been so supportive and love to go to garage sales to find props for her act!

I don't like most of the scripted challenges but the musical ones always crack me up because EVERY season there's someone who claims to be a great singer and/or dancer who then shows their ass when the time comes to actually sing or dance AND I LOVE IT. Brita trying to do the Roger Rabbit was hilarious every single time.

Jan's Borderline Madonna was perfect except for that sad hitch kick. I loved her flight attendant runway look.

Jackie's Like a Virgin Boy Toy Madonna had the right costume but that was it. The makeup and the actual performance did not evoke Madonna at all. Her Michelle Visage runway look was a little too Jersey Shore and not enough Michelle (which I know sounds contradictory but there it is).

Gigi's Papa Don't Preach Madonna wasn't very Madonna but it was a decent if somewhat awkward performance. Her Lovely Day Michelle Visage was great. The gag with getting those long nails stuck in her hair was a fun moment.

Brita's Express Yourself Madonna was disappointing after all the "I studied musical theater" talk. She had some of the easiest choreography and she still looked uncomfortable with it. Her S10 finale Michelle was fine.

Jaida's Justify My Love Madonna was great. She really got that sexy Madonna vibe. Her ICON Michelle was also great!

Sherry's Evita Madonna was a good performance but her makeup didn't look like Madonna at all. Her runway look was a good take on Michelle's kitty girl look but I'm so tired of Sherry's open mouthed look.

Crystal's Ray of Light Madonna was good too. She really committed. Her red Michelle look was really fun.

Widow's Music Madonna had great attitude and confidence. Her red, white, and blue Michelle look was cute.

Heidi's Madonna was a little lacking for me. She had moments when her dancing was strong but for the most part, her dancing needed more punch. I liked her TOWIE Michelle look - that hair!

Burning Up is an underrated Madonna song so I was excited to see the LSFYL. To be honest, I thought both Heidi and Brita were not great but I thought Heidi was better overall.

I definitely would have given the win to Jan instead of Gigi.

I loved everything about AOC on Untucked.

Edited April 11, 2020 by ElectricBoogaloo

[Just Carol]

I thought Brita's LSFYL was better than Heidi's.  I don't like Brita, but I call bs on her sashay. Perhaps Ru was making an effort to oust Brita and thus chose Heidi as bottom two instead of Jackie bcs she thought Heidi would be stronger in the LS.  

Gigi deserved the win. I feel bad for Jan.  I wonder which Madonna role she wanted.

[Fallacy]

I thought Jan and Gigi did great, but Gigi had more tricks in her dance, so I guess that’s why Ru gave the win to her. 

I agreed with the judges that Heidi wasn’t doing Madonna at all, and Brita just looked awkward out there, so I guess the bottom 2 was okay. I’m happy Brita is gone because the show spent way too much time on her, and I’d like to get to know the other queens better. 

I know nothing about Jan other than the fact that she studied musical theater in school. What’s her story? Who is her character? Why did she pick “Just Jan” as her drag name? I want to know. We also know zero about Jaiden. 

[Keywestclubkid]

7 hours ago, cpcathy said:

Which Madonna was Heidi supposed to be?

She was supposed to be the hard candy era Madonna. It wasn’t a very strong era look for Madonna cause it was nothing memorable 

Edited April 11, 2020 by Keywestclubkid

[CraftyHazel]

47 minutes ago, Fallacy said:

I thought Jan and Gigi did great, but Gigi had more tricks in her dance, so I guess that’s why Ru gave the win to her. 

I agreed with the judges that Heidi wasn’t doing Madonna at all, and Brita just looked awkward out there, so I guess the bottom 2 was okay. I’m happy Brita is gone because the show spent way too much time on her, and I’d like to get to know the other queens better. 

I know nothing about Jan other than the fact that she studied musical theater in school. What’s her story? Who is her character? Why did she pick “Just Jan” as her drag name? I want to know. We also know zero about Jaiden. 

Jan’s name is actually JanSport, isn’t it?  And she wasn’t allowed to use it.

[gorgy]

I watched the entire rusical (minus catfish queen), which is usually the challenge I skip every year. I'm not into musicals but, well bitch, it's Madonna. Overall, I thought everyone did a good job, but the only two that carried the Queen of Pop vibe for me were Gigi and Jaida. I personally enjoyed Crystal Method's part the most, so her being in top three was well deserved. In this challenge Jan met expectations, but didn't exceed expectations. Gigi's runway look didn't amaze me either, so it's a tossup for me who should have won. Widow has some of the worst runway looks of any season.

Edited April 11, 2020 by gorgy

[funnygirl]

I thought Jan's confidence at the start of the episode/challenge was justified seeing as she did slay both challenge and runway to damn near perfection. No disrespect to Gigi because she is fierce, but Jan did everything right. This was a robbery. If I'm going by the judges critiques, Gigi won because she can do a backflip and pass as a supermodel.  

Bye Brita. Can't LSFYL four weeks in a row and expect to survive. Heidi would've had to been an emotionless statue to lose.

Edited April 11, 2020 by funnygirl

[853fisher]

3 hours ago, Marmiarmo said:

Jan’s name is actually JanSport, isn’t it?  And she wasn’t allowed to use it.

Exactly right.  They don't seem to allow the names of brands or celebrities in the girls' names, I assume for legal reasons.

 

And in response to the comment that prompted this answer, I hear you!  I do feel that we've gotten a little more out of Jan.  I remember her telling a story a few weeks ago, when they did the sports-themed runway, about how she was an avid soccer player when she was young and about how the worlds of sports and performance collided for her.  But I can understand wanting to know more.

 

I feel sometimes that the show focuses on stories of adversity or pain to the exclusion of general backstory, which certainly makes good TV but possibly is to the disadvantage of those who don't have, or don't feel comfortable telling, some of those stories.  I hope that doesn't sound too flip or cynical.

 

Either way, I know Jan is also perceived as a bit of a try-hard by some.  I don't really see that either, but then again I'm a bit of a try-hard myself if I'm honest. 🙂  I like her and do think she was robbed this week.  I hope she won't let this, and how other queens might respond to her, derail her progress in the competition.

[Amello]

I honestly believe the only reason Jan didn't win and that the judges are continuously sleeping on her is because they (the producers) see her strong resolve and how badly she wants to win and they want to break her down for the entertainment. 

At least the right person went home.

It was cool to hear that Crystal was allowed to implement her own ideas into her Madonna. The producers wouldn't allow that to everyone, I bet, at least in the past.

Also, Jaida's performance, from the second she stepped out, even in the coat, I was already turned on. That was hot.

And anyone else notice Jan in her jeans? Girl has got some nice cake. I may or may not have a crush on boyJan. #sorrynotsorry

[zenithwit]

I like AOC as judge but thought this challenge was a mismatch for her.  She kept very tight facial expressions throughout the rusical.  Maybe she was a last minute add this season after they found out she was a fan last season?

[ClareWalks]

40 minutes ago, zenithwit said:

I like AOC as judge but thought this challenge was a mismatch for her.  She kept very tight facial expressions throughout the rusical.  Maybe she was a last minute add this season after they found out she was a fan last season?

I'm guessing they wanted her to guest-judge but her schedule was tight and this was the only episode that fit. I'm not sure though!

I think Gigi's win was deserved, although Jan was phenomenal. Jan was the best singer of the bunch, but ultimately I felt she was serving me less Madonna and more "High School Musical." Might have been because she picked (or was talked into) a more pop-py and peppy era of Madonna but there ya go. I think if the Rusical hadn't been Madonna-themed, Jan would have easily won. I did laugh when Jan killed it and Widow's voiceover was like "we put the best singer first, whose fuckin' idea was THAT?!" and cut to Jackie looking stressed, LOL.

Glad Brita is gone. I wish her the best and success in her career, but I was sick of her awful interviews/talking heads. In the Whatcha Packin' Michelle talked so much about how Brita was such a positive and fun presence and I'm wondering why we saw exactly ZERO of that.

Edited April 11, 2020 by ClareWalks
clarity

[theatremouse]

15 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

What does Jan have to do to get a win? 

A back handspring.

[loki310]

Jaida’s Justify My Love was hella sexy. I think she nailed that. Just perfect. Was also impressed with how Gigi did as well. She’s pretty much unstoppable, I guess. 

Heidi continues to have a special place in my heart. 

[DEL901]

On rewatch, Brita being so delighted that they had finally found Gigi’s weakness and Heidi laughing with delight....karma’s a bitch when they landed in the bottom and she won.   
 

Loved Jan, but she didn’t channel Madonna, although I would have been happy if she had won. I do love Gigi and Jackie, too, although this wasn’t her best performance. 
 

I checked the seasons results, so far, and if you disregard the first two intro episodes, Gigi has won 3 times and Cherry twice.  

Just now, DEL901 said:I

 

Edited April 11, 2020 by DEL901

[Blissfool]

I think Jan could have used a bushier brow to pull off the Madonna look.

Another thing, I'm a fan of Madonna. However, I didn't enjoy the Rusical as much as I thought i would have. I couldnt make out the melody of the original songs. The only one I really recognized was Justify My Love.

[For Cereals]

Love Gigi and Jan and...pretty much everyone left except Cherry and Widow.  Widow just seems like a miserable person.  Always complaining and seems to take delight in everyone’s misery.  Not so much in a have a little popcorn way but an emotional vampire feeding way...

[le bordel chaud]

I wouldn't be surprised to see Crystal debarge her way into the finale. Ru seems to have a crush on her.. 

Surely Gigi's march to the crown can't be this easy? Is anyone who wasn't later disqualified going to put up any kind of fight?

I might be kind of corny but I kind of liked Brita's lip synch and felt like it was menopause-inspired, possibly. Actually on second thought, I just sort of tolerated it but I still thought she was better than Heidi. 

With 8 (?) queens left, many of them are evenly matched so it could be fun the next couple weeks to see who winds up sashaying.

Edited April 11, 2020 by Victim Noises

[rlc]

Eh, don’t think Jan was robbed. Yes, she’s the best singer, but she wasn’t the best Madonna. I’m not sure I would have given the win to Gigi, but she continues to impress. There is way more there than I would have anticipated in week 1.

Gigi gave a ton of confidence, and practically oozed Madonna. I also adored Crystal, but I’m definitely biased because she’s my quirky favorite. I’m partial to quirk over polish.

[Blissfool]

I need to let Brita know that I fell and hurt my knee on Feb 25, and it still hurts when i put pressure on it. There's no way I could kneel on it. 😛

[NightOwl89]

I just ADORE Crystal, her performance made me laugh out loud. I agree with Gigi for the win- watching back, she’s the one who embodies Madonna the best.

 

These are some talented queens. I wish there was less of a clear winner, and the disqualified one wasn’t there, but damn this season is good. 

 

[CraftyHazel]

20 minutes ago, NightOwl89 said:

I just ADORE Crystal, her performance made me laugh out loud. I agree with Gigi for the win- watching back, she’s the one who embodies Madonna the best.

 

These are some talented queens. I wish there was less of a clear winner, and the disqualified one wasn’t there, but damn this season is good. 

 

I adore Crystal, too!!  Such a sweetheart!  And she’s actually talented, too.

[HunterHunted]

1 hour ago, Blissfool said:

I need to let Brita know that I fell and hurt my knee on Feb 25, and it still hurts when i put pressure on it. There's no way I could kneel on it. 😛

They film 2 episodes a week. So Widow injured herself 2 and a half weeks ago; that's not a huge amount of time. It takes 2 - 3 weeks to heal from a sprain. Unless Brita has x-ray eyes, she just needed to shut it. That's unless Brita uses the sounds generated by her humongous mouth to do echo imaging. "I'm one of the top performers in New York and Widow your knee is healing nicely."

[belligerent]

I very much prefer when they do the singing on these musicals themselves vs. the ones that are sung by other people. I know not everyone is a singer but it seems more personal when they do their own parts instead of the really produced musical numbers.

Beyond that, thank god Brita is finally gone. I feel like there's a level of Dunning-Kruger effect to her that's become more obvious as the season has progressed. Considering we have the same "boy name," I take it personnel-y.

Loved Heidi speculating that maybe she, herself, was the trade of the season. I love her in general, though. I don't think she's going to win the competition but I think she definitely has enough charisma that has shown through that it will only help her after this.

I think Jan was competent but it's really super hard to take my eyes off Gigi when she's doing anything. She has an "it factor" that I'm not sure Jan has. I'm not sure if it's her emoting, the proportions of her body making everything look really exaggerated, or what.

I think Jan also has the misfortune of the association with Jan Brady that everyone is kind of making, especially since she can't be "Jan Sport." We expect her to be outshone by someone, so that's what happens to confirm the unconscious bias.

I haven't put a ton of thought into it, but I wonder if anyone's looked into if drag name ever seems to factor into how well a queen does.

Edited April 12, 2020 by belligerent
because saying "definitely" that many times in one paragraph should not happen outside of rita and runt

[gorgy]

Jan has this affected, high-school drama club aspect to her personality which is why it's difficult for me to really root for her because it comes off as disingenuous when I can see the wheels turning. It started off in the tulle challenge and she came out with tools and made it clear how clever she thought she was. I get it, you don't need to point it out. That's the difference between someone wanting to be applauded for their effort compared to someone gaining accolades for making it look effortless. That's why Jan is a Jan and Gigi is a Marcia. The producers asked Gigi who Patti Lupone was and she hemmed & hawed and still gave a fantastic Madonna-inspired performance whereas Jan would tell you Patti's entire wikipedia bio word-for-word with a shit eating grin and those psychotic eyebrows (they are a cry for help) and gave a fundamentally-sound performance that didn't feel at all unique or special. This is sounding harsher than I planned on when I started typing. Anyway, I bet Jan is probably great on stage at a live performance, but this is a tv show that forces me, the viewer, to see behind the curtain just a little, and I'm not buying what she's selling. 

[Blissfool]

38 minutes ago, gorgy said:

Jan has this affected, high-school drama club aspect to her personality which is why it's difficult for me to really root for her because it comes off as disingenuous when I can see the wheels turning. It started off in the tulle challenge and she came out with tools and made it clear how clever she thought she was. I get it, you don't need to point it out. That's the difference between someone wanting to be applauded for their effort compared to someone gaining accolades for making it look effortless. That's why Jan is a Jan and Gigi is a Marcia. The producers asked Gigi who Patti Lupone was and she hemmed & hawed and still gave a fantastic Madonna-inspired performance whereas Jan would tell you Patti's entire wikipedia bio word-for-word with a shit eating grin and those psychotic eyebrows (they are a cry for help) and gave a fundamentally-sound performance that didn't feel at all unique or special. This is sounding harsher than I planned on when I started typing. Anyway, I bet Jan is probably great on stage at a live performance, but this is a tv show that forces me, the viewer, to see behind the curtain just a little, and I'm not buying what she's selling. 

My gosh...you described her perfectly. That's exactly how I see Jan!

Dare I say, you've got her pegged!

BTW, I hate those eyebrows too.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Dear Carson,

That was not a "round off in the air."

XoXo,
Someone who only took beginning gymnastics as a five year old but still knows what a round off is

[rlc]

10 hours ago, NightOwl89 said:

These are some talented queens. I wish there was less of a clear winner, and the disqualified one wasn’t there, but damn this season is good. 

 

I’m just glad that Sherry isn’t the clear cut winner. As much as her presence puts a shadow over the season, I was concerned that she would dominate the entire competition only to not appear in the finals, basically causing the eventual winner to have an asterisk by their name.

[DEL901]

I think they all underestimated Gigi because she’s the type of performer who comes alive in front of the audience.   
 

I like the majority of the cast.  Of course she who must not be named has been edited out as much as possible which helps.  I’ve liked Jan and I hope her disappoint at not winning doesn’t make her bitter.   And so happy Crystal is doing so well.  I hope she keeps it up.   And what can I say about Gigi except I hope this isn’t going to end up as a set up for a big upset....unless it is Crystal.  I’d be okay with her winning because I think Gigi has already proven herself and if she doesn’t win this season, she’s a lock for All Stars. 

[Amello]

Random thought that has no meaning or purpose whatsoever: Does Jackie Cox's drag resemble Andrea Martin to anyone else? Just me? Okay, just a thought, I'll see myself out.

Edited April 12, 2020 by Amello

[2727]

I'm glad none of the queens pulled out the I don't know Madonna very well excuse. When it comes to foundational drag icons, I don't care how young or "not from here" they are, the careless ignorance is annoying.

Now, if that moment happened and the editors hid it from us, my blood pressure thanks them. If that moment happened and I missed it, don't tell me!

[Blakeston]

A bunch of thoughts:

1. As much as Brita came across as unlikeable, there must have been more to her than what we saw. It seems like she really made a positive impression on a lot of people. (Some of it may be that the other contestants were kissing her ass because of how well-connected she is, but I doubt it's all attributable to that.)

2. I'll give Brita credit for one other thing, too - she really knows how to dress for her body type. Until I saw her in that cone-bra outfit, I had no idea what her real shape was.

3. Crystal is very sweet, but I wouldn't have put her in the top 3 over Jaida. And Heidi didn't belong in the bottom over Jackie. Heidi was at least entertaining to watch, whereas Jackie's performance went over like a fart.

It seems to me like Ru is really pushing Gigi, Sherry, Crystal and Jackie, and Heidi and Jan are just afterthoughts. I think Ru was worried that Jackie wouldn't be able to survive a lip sync against Brita.

4. With Crystal's dad suffering from Parkinson's, I'm sure it wasn't awkward at ALL for her to have to sit by Sherry in Snatch Game, considering that every joke Sherry had was mocking someone for shaking.

[Ohiopirate02]

20 hours ago, Blissfool said:

I need to let Brita know that I fell and hurt my knee on Feb 25, and it still hurts when i put pressure on it. There's no way I could kneel on it. 😛

I thought Widow said it was a cut.  My cuts hurt worse when the skin starts healing and has zero stretch.  I get why Widow winced.  I do appreciate the choreographer changing the moves immediately once Widow spoke up.  

[ClareWalks]

1 hour ago, Blakeston said:

4. With Crystal's dad suffering from Parkinson's, I'm sure it wasn't awkward at ALL for her to have to sit by Sherry in Snatch Game, considering that every joke Sherry had was mocking someone for shaking.

Oh my god, you're right. That was horrible all on its own, but the context with Crystal makes it even worse.

[roctavia]

1 hour ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I thought Widow said it was a cut.  My cuts hurt worse when the skin starts healing and has zero stretch.  I get why Widow winced.  I do appreciate the choreographer changing the moves immediately once Widow spoke up.  

Yes, she also said something about bleeding all over... so I wonder if she was afraid it would pull apart and start bleeding again.. 

[Keywestclubkid]

On 4/11/2020 at 1:19 AM, Sew Sumi said:

What does Jan have to do to get a win? 

Be GIGi lol

[DEL901]

Jan did a great job singing and with the choreography, but didn’t give off the Madonna vibe.   Even back in the Lucky Star era, Madonna projected sexuality.  Jan just gave of a fun vibe.   I would have been happy if she had won, but I think Gigi won it, not with the backflip which was amazing, but with those stutter steps they showed her having trouble with during rehearsals.  She was fierce!

[RoxiP]

I was amazed by Gigi's performance simply because she had so much trouble in rehearsal.  She must have a fierce work ethic because the Gigi who came out in the performance was not the Gigi in rehearsal.  I like both Gigi and Jan but Madonna should only hope to look as good as Gigi did in that black outfit.