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S07.E17: Let Them Eat Penis Cake!


OnceSane
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I don't think I could ever work for any of these people. I feel creeped out by the "brü's" and Kate wouldn't be any kind of support as a stew. Simone annoyed me based on her general braggery of her "book smarts" and calling service basically a simple/menial job. She hadn't performed well at all this season.  I believe she also let Tanner the sloppy a**hole drunk get in her head. That's when she really went downhill for me. She should move on to another career path and get her self esteem in check.  

If we are meant to believe Courtney and Brian haven't had any sex this season, they take us for total fools.

And I'm tired of the "below deck" sob stories. Everything with these 25-38 year olds comes back to "when i was a kid, growing up, all we had was our friends..." "my parents split up," "my family member died," "we were poor..." - all meant to excuse and explain away bad behavior. Grow the fu** up. 

Brian and Courtney have nothing to do with "loyalty" issues. It's that he's done with her. Plain & simple.  So immature with the "loyalty" story. He's known Courtney the same period of time as the guys and she has also been a support for him. She is a lady & should be treated with respect. He can fu** off.

 

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15 minutes ago, Kdawg82 said:

we are meant to believe Courtney and Brian haven't had any sex this season, they take us for total fools.

I have no trouble believing it. They have had picked up sound or other evidence of cast members who thought they were sneaking around and showed video when they had it and the cameras in their rooms are 24/7.

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That cake was weird and ridiculous, but I've gotta give Kevin props for using a muffin top as a dick head.  I never would have thought of that and I feel like it was pretty perfect and ingenious and I might never look at a muffin the same way again. 

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18 hours ago, Mondrianyone said:

I would still like to know what my post about Simone buddying up to the douche-hands has to do with discrimination or lack thereof against the black guests.  Please stop quoting me and lumping my post in with others that don't relate in any way to what I said.  My post was about lack of self-esteem on the part of a woman who should hold herself as high in practice as she does in theory.  If Simone wants to align herself with men who have no respect for her simply because she hates Kate for calling her out as incompetent and they also hate Kate, good luck to her in the rest of her life.  I predict it will not go well for her.  The enemy of your enemy is not necessarily your friend.

With regard to Simone in the audience at WWHL, along with Brian and Tanner, I think it was mentioned that they were filming the Reunion the next day, so that is why they were all in New York.  

I'm wondering if they were invited to WWHL because they were in NY, and Simone was the only woman who agreed to go?  I'm not making excuses for her, because I don't think I would want to sit anywhere near those assholes unless I was forced to (as in at the Reunion taping).  Simone made the choice to sit with them - I'm sure if she asked, she could have been seated in another section of the WWHL audience.  

Oh, and Tanner and Brian just looked gross at the WWHL taping - they looked like they needed showers and some personal grooming.  

Lastly - Kevin is just a no accountability douche.  I think he's realized he fucked up big time this season and just couldn't talk his way out of anything with his smarmy smirk and comments.

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3 minutes ago, njbchlover said:

With regard to Simone in the audience at WWHL, along with Brian and Tanner, I think it was mentioned that they were filming the Reunion the next day, so that is why they were all in New York.  

I'm wondering if they were invited to WWHL because they were in NY, and Simone was the only woman who agreed to go?  I'm not making excuses for her, because I don't think I would want to sit anywhere near those assholes unless I was forced to (as in at the Reunion taping).  Simone made the choice to sit with them - I'm sure if she asked, she could have been seated in another section of the WWHL audience.  

Oh, and Tanner and Brian just looked gross at the WWHL taping - they looked like they needed showers and some personal grooming.  

Lastly - Kevin is just a no accountability douche.  I think he's realized he fucked up big time this season and just couldn't talk his way out of anything with his smarmy smirk and comments.

I suspect the reason they were all sitting so close together is for camera purposes - it is much easier to just point a camera at the three of them as opposed to locating people sitting separately.  Besides, time has passed by and Simone may have just decided to move on.  Of all the women on this season's BD I suspect she is the one who was least affected by the douchery (in my opinion she is just as guilty of the slimy relationship with Tanner as he is - she answered his call EACH AND EVERY TIME) of the Brus.  

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I hated that Kate referred to Jemele as a b*tch.  It's Kate's job to make the guests feel welcome & special.  Kate is great at a lot of things but she rarely acts enthused or positive. What's going on behind the scenes within the crew is no excuse for not making the guests feel as though serving them is anything less than an absolute pleasure.  They were easy guests, it should not have been a difficult task.  Jamele was feeling like Kate was annoyed & inconvenienced, and that's not acceptable. Kate needed to put it in perspective & shape up rather than take it as a personal assault.

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19 minutes ago, Snewtsie said:

Jamele was feeling like Kate was annoyed & inconvenienced, and that's not acceptable. Kate needed to put it in perspective & shape up rather than take it as a personal assault.

I do agree that Kate should not have let her attitude impact the guests experience and should have made it so they didn’t feel that tension. However, if Jemele had left it at the one remark that Kate acknowledged and apologized for I don’t think she would have reacted that way but she kept pestering her about it and than said that she was going to go out of her way to annoy her which is a bitchy thing to say. 

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21 minutes ago, Red Bridey said:

Lady, don't you have anything better to notice? Look at the ocean, sit on the deck and daydream. I as a guest would not expect the Chief Stew to hang out and gossip with me

I had much the same thought. Looking for trouble? I just don't get it.

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33 minutes ago, Red Bridey said:

Remember, the women had been on board for about an hour when Jemele starts worrying about Kate's attitude. Lady, don't you have anything better to notice? Look at the ocean, sit on the deck and daydream. I as a guest would not expect the Chief Stew to hang out and gossip with me just as the trip begins. Maybe after a day or two, but I would expect the Chief Stew to have bigger problems to focus on at the beginning of my cruise.

I’m with you, I really don’t like when servers act too friendly. We’re not friends, but a little friendlier than Kate was would be fine. The guests should never feel any bad “vibe” from the crew but I don’t worry if a server of any kind likes me.

This reminds me of the guys telling the women to smile more.

Jenelle should have spoken to Kate in private, she didn’t handle it like a boss, but they’ve kissed and made up so, they both appear to be over it.

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46 minutes ago, dleighg said:

I had much the same thought. Looking for trouble? I just don't get it.

Ever since they made a big deal of Kate having "resting bitch face", I've always thought that the guests that jump on Kate's attitude almost immediately did their homework on the show and are looking for screen time.

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6 hours ago, Snewtsie said:

I hated that Kate referred to Jemele as a b*tch.  It's Kate's job to make the guests feel welcome & special.  Kate is great at a lot of things but she rarely acts enthused or positive. What's going on behind the scenes within the crew is no excuse for not making the guests feel as though serving them is anything less than an absolute pleasure.  They were easy guests, it should not have been a difficult task.  Jamele was feeling like Kate was annoyed & inconvenienced, and that's not acceptable. Kate needed to put it in perspective & shape up rather than take it as a personal assault.

It’s not as if Kate said it directly to Jemele.She was venting in her cabin and likely not even cognizant of how it would sound once aired. I would prefer it if they never spoke ill of the charter guests, but they do all the time.  What makes this different? 

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38 minutes ago, laprin said:

It’s not as if Kate said it directly to Jemele.She was venting in her cabin and likely not even cognizant of how it would sound once aired. I would prefer it if they never spoke ill of the charter guests, but they do all the time.  What makes this different? 

The difference is Jemele was right. Kate was not making the guests feel special. Jemele just pointed out the obvious. And I agree I’d rather the crew never spoke ill of the chatter guests. I often think how embarrassing it must be for them to watch themselves on TV later. 

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59 minutes ago, laprin said:

 I would prefer it if they never spoke ill of the charter guests, but they do all the time.  

If they didn’t than the show probably wouldn’t have gotten a second season. I also wouldn’t find it realistic, people vent about customers or coworkers all the time and it’s not like they also don’t say nice things when the guests are nice.

Edited by biakbiak
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5 hours ago, laprin said:

I would prefer it if they never spoke ill of the charter guests, but they do all the time.  What makes this different? 

I rewatched part of an episode from season 2 today. 2nd stew Kat was unpacking a guest’s luggage and holding up and making fun of the guest’s underwear. Kate was laughing along, not really making her own comments but also not stopping it.

I’d far rather be called a bitch by someone who self identifies as a bitch than have my dainties held up and mocked.

giphy.gif

 

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For the persons who are NOT Black born in America (I am) let me give a little education.

At times in life we have had to hope for quality"service" that should be afforded in same way that other races might get... It doesn't always happen that way.  If in fact we are allowed to even enter a bar or restaurant or club (which is not always a given)  we are met with cold attitudes, indifference and rudeness.  Sometimes we are even asked to pre-pay when others don't.

So right or wrong, at times when someone doing their service to us as a guest is demonstrating that behavior, our radar goes up.  It is sad, and certainly it is not something we look forward too but you can either respond with walking out or confronting the issue.

I suspect Jemele and her crew was feeling that with Kate as the footage shows she is doing that bitchy, pyscho attitude thing and I believe Jemele took the proactive necessary approach to either get clarification on the problem or nip it the fuck in the bud then and there to get some corrective behavior.  I mean Jemele and guests were on a yacht so there was no way to remove themselves from there, so the confrontation was the option.

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5 hours ago, lcarolynl said:

I rewatched part of an episode from season 2 today

I saw the episode when the horrendous guests brought scumbag Adrienne back to the boat for dinner. Captain made several remarks and had to eat dinner with these wasted lowlifes. I hope they had a great time watching themselves when the show aired.

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On ‎1‎/‎28‎/‎2020 at 12:36 PM, Neurochick said:

Well she did keep going on and on and on about how the guest was a "bitch" to her, so there is that.  She's not St. Kate to me at all, especially after the way she treated Simone.  Sure Simone was a shit stew, but Kate didn't know that when she immediately bonded with Courtney.  I can't stand either of them, especially Courtney with her....tears.  If Simone had been crying no one would have given a shit.

Simone has done nothing but dig her own grave all season. No one cares about her math degree. She initially stated she liked laundry, then about faced on that. She desperately threw herself at Tanner, and went back for more when it was clear he was using her. Even post season, she is bonding with the jabroni bru crew.

Respectfully, its ok for Kate to bond with Courtney whether initially or down the line. Its also ok for her to not bond with Simone. Simone really didn't try to bond with Kate at any point, and now lurks around the boat trying to find moments where she can snark about Kate. 

I don't believe the core issue here is that there is a race issue. I think the core issue is Simone is entitled and inexperienced, and expected more out of this job than she ended up with. 
                 
 

 

Edited by Crazydoxielady
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14 hours ago, dleighg said:
15 hours ago, Red Bridey said:

Lady, don't you have anything better to notice? Look at the ocean, sit on the deck and daydream. I as a guest would not expect the Chief Stew to hang out and gossip with me

I had much the same thought. Looking for trouble? I just don't get it.

I think it is a fair assumption the primary came onto the boat looking for drama and honed in on Kate. Kate has an admitted RBF, has had a horrible season, but remained professional. The primary was looking to upset the apple cart, likely for more camera time. While I am glad she apologized, she stopped her 90's party to do so in an abrupt manner, and I just rolled my eyes, as it was an obvious ploy for attention.  She was there for her bachelorette, yet spent the majority of the time focused on Kate. Good luck to her husband, as he is going to be alpha femaled and one upped into infinity (or as long as they stay married). Not a fan of the primary what so ever.

Kate mentioned on IG this week she did not wear her epaulettes on the final charter, as it was clear the crew did not respect her seniority. She was truly a worn down dog that the primary thought would be fodder to be kicked around a little while she was down.

I thought her friends were just lovely, however, and before the ill timed penis cake, it was nice to see Captain Lee enjoy a real conversation with polite guests that were just sweethearts the entire charter.  I think its telling the drama filled drunk primary was not at the table, thereby leaving room for the ladies to enjoy Captain Lee and have a great conversation. The cake may have been ill timed, but its not Kates fault the primary became drunk to the point of having to go to bed. She asked for the cake, and indeed she got what she asked for.  She can hear about it later and reflect on her drunkenness as the reason she was not there for it.   I will say I thought all the "hair" type of stuff around the cake was weird. I said to my hubby, why not just a nice big D with some little cake balls at the base? We don't need this level of skewed realism.  

Edited by Crazydoxielady
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40 minutes ago, Crazydoxielady said:

think it is a fair assumption the primary came onto the boat looking for drama and honed in on Kate. Kate has an admitted RBF, has had a horrible season, but remained professional.

My prior post was deleted but I agree with you.

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4 hours ago, tiredofwork said:

For the persons who are NOT Black born in America (I am) let me give a little education.

At times in life we have had to hope for quality"service" that should be afforded in same way that other races might get... It doesn't always happen that way.  If in fact we are allowed to even enter a bar or restaurant or club (which is not always a given)  we are met with cold attitudes, indifference and rudeness.  Sometimes we are even asked to pre-pay when others don't.

So right or wrong, at times when someone doing their service to us as a guest is demonstrating that behavior, our radar goes up.  It is sad, and certainly it is not something we look forward too but you can either respond with walking out or confronting the issue.

I suspect Jemele and her crew was feeling that with Kate as the footage shows she is doing that bitchy, pyscho attitude thing and I believe Jemele took the proactive necessary approach to either get clarification on the problem or nip it the fuck in the bud then and there to get some corrective behavior.  I mean Jemele and guests were on a yacht so there was no way to remove themselves from there, so the confrontation was the option.

I don’t doubt for one minute what you describe. But..... Jemelle’s handling of her perception of the problem made an awkward situation far worse than necessary.

I use the words “her perception of the problem” because what we all know, and Jemele now knows, is that Kate was beaten down by a hostile workplace and was focused on her service, not her smile. Her lack of joviality had nothing to do with race. 

My dad used to say, Just because you’re paranoid, doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you. Just because Jamele might be primed to see racism everywhere, it could still be racism.

And Freud said said, Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

in this instance, I think it’s just a cigar. Jemele may have expected and perceived racism, but I don’t think racism was behind Kate’s service and I think Jemele came to the same conclusion by her party that night.

But I believe, no, I know, that big and small attacks of racism are woven throughout the lives of African Americans on a daily basis and the chance of a really ugly encounter could happen any and every day. I’m with you completely on that.

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20 hours ago, ParadoxLost said:

Ever since they made a big deal of Kate having "resting bitch face", I've always thought that the guests that jump on Kate's attitude almost immediately did their homework on the show and are looking for screen time.

Jemele’s reaction to me seemed very producer-encouraged and awkward. Yes, Kate’s BRF was on full display but after, like, 2 minutes interaction the guest was calling her out. It just seemed like a setup. For all the claims this show isn’t scripted, and I believe it is not, I do believe there are “suggestions” made  and scenes are shot and sometimes reshot for better effect. 

Next season I would love to see more of Kate calling the guests bitches, making rocket ships from towels, and sparring with the chef. Want less of deckhands being drunk assholes. Much less. I have been so bored and so annoyed with this season. NOT fun. Rarely rewatched any episodes. Also, we’ve now seen Thailand and, although pretty, it seemed hot and miserable for the deck crew and guests, too. Let’s go back to the Caribbean! 

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With Bravo showing EVERY SINGLE EPISODE OF BELOW DECK FOR DAYS ON END.... I'm so tired! Of it all!  It does seem like Thailand is kind of wearing on guests and crew.  I liked it better in the carribean, even the med!

I think that Kate has a really great working relationship with Captain Lee and that's helped her... A lot.  

The deck bru's just need to move along.  The way they treated Rylee was just hideous. Assholes!

I'm looking forward to the bigass sailboat BD.  

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Gosh.  I just went back and watched the episode again.  And...I didn't see anything that Kate did that would be considered her having a problem with a guest.

She smiled and graciously gave them the tour.  She was smiling and considerate when some of the guests wanted to use some things that they brought along for the party.  At the lunch scene, you can see her smiling in the background opening wine when Kevin came up.

She was quiet when she was refilling drinks later.  I don't know what the primary wanted.  Was Kate supposed to start a conversation with them?  Earlier with Simone, the primary started the conversation because of her accent.

Jemele was a little ridiculous when she kept going in on Kate about basically accusing Kate that she was getting on Kate's nerves.

I think Jemele had a bit of an attitude earlier when she asked Kate what was planned for the rest of day.  They were going to get the toys out and have dinner at 8:30.  Jemele responded 9:00.  I think Kate said ok.  What bothered me was her comment to the other guests.  No one tells her when she has dinner.  Did Kate argue with her over the dinner time?  Nope.  And it's funny when they first got there Kate said lunch would be at 1:30.  No problem with that.

I was watching season three today.  I think I have virus.  One of the episodes was the one when Cynthia Bailey was on.  No problems with Kate. 

On another note, I had forgotten how screwed up Rocky was.

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6 hours ago, breezy424 said:

Gosh.  I just went back and watched the episode again.  And...I didn't see anything that Kate did that would be considered her having a problem with a guest.

Thank you for your post! I agree with everything you noted. I find it annoying when people insist on reading into 'body/face language' while the person viewed is simply being gracious and doing their job. I felt the primary was overreacting and creating drama due to being in an alcoholic stupor for most of the charter.

Edited by Chalby
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On 1/28/2020 at 9:29 PM, Kdawg82 said:

So immature with the "loyalty" story. He's known Courtney the same period of time as the guys and she has also been a support for him. 

And how is it that Brian hasn't clued in to the fact that any discord between Courtney and himself has always been instigated by Kevin the idiot Bru who has a knack for embellishing details?

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16 hours ago, lcarolynl said:

And Freud said said, Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

I think it's important for us to shake off our 'home' perceptions and embrace the fact we're on holiday in a country that is vastly different than those in North America. I know, easier said than done. I have had to stop my own negative internal dialogue when traveling in Europe. Yep, it's not always about me. Sometimes it's just a cigar, lol.

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On 1/29/2020 at 11:50 AM, Snewtsie said:

I hated that Kate referred to Jemele as a b*tch.  It's Kate's job to make the guests feel welcome & special.  Kate is great at a lot of things but she rarely acts enthused or positive. What's going on behind the scenes within the crew is no excuse for not making the guests feel as though serving them is anything less than an absolute pleasure.  They were easy guests, it should not have been a difficult task. 

I did not see Kate acting in any other way than she has been acting all charter season. Nor do I mind that Kate said (not within ear shot of any guests) that Jemele was being a bitch. That's the whole point of the show - how the yacht staff sound off about the guests. Don't forget, Primaries', and Staff's first impressions often changed 180º by the end of the charter, and if they don't, so what? Kate's job was to be gracious and serve the guests. If they disliked her 'gracious face vibe', that's on them. If I were Kate, I'd be annoyed too. If I welcomed them professionally ;  provided service, only to learn I was be accused of treating them as though they were being a nuisance. I'd be so annoyed for being judged without the courtesy of a verbal interaction. Trust me! Even I do NOT want to see Kate doing the, "Aw Shucks, I'm -So- Glad- to- be- Here- Serving- Your- Ass", Kate Shuffle!

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On 1/29/2020 at 11:33 PM, Mondrianyone said:

The show is called Below Deck because it's about the crew, not the guests.  The crew members are the stars and the guests are supporting players that the crew bounce their reactions off.  (When they're not fighting with one another, that is.)  The guests provide comic fodder for the crew, getting on their nerves by being absurdly demanding, as if they think they're royalty (even though all or part of their costs are being comped by the show), or making them laugh by being generally ridiculous.  The crew members have always said insulting things about the guests, the vast majority of whom have been white.  It's like Upstairs, Downstairs with water slides.

You've explained it perfectly. I mean that's the whole premise of the show. Watching the crew and staff deal with the charters and charter guests and how they react to them. To be honest I wish that's where it would stay. The snarking on the ridiculousness of the guests, damage control when the crew fucks up, and how they get through the absurd demands and preferences of the guests. I'd rather that than the very cringe worthy bullshit they put each other through between skeevy hook ups, drunken violence and sloppy advances as well as the hideous disrespect.  

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4 hours ago, Chalby said:

Thank you for your post! I agree with everything you noted. I find it annoying when people insist on reading into 'body/face language' while the person viewed is simply being gracious and doing their job. I felt the primary was overreacting and creating drama due to being in an alcoholic stupor for most of the charter.

It does bug me when people expect some overt grandiose behavior from service staff. Being in the service industry shouldn't equate to being a dancing monkey. I get that there should be a warmth to the interactions but at the same time I really wish people would stop requiring particular body language or that a person exude a certain level of positive energy.

First of all, everyone has a different idea of what's enough, what's too much, etc. etc. so I think it's just fair all around to accept when a person is doing their duties and performing their tasks. As long as it's not some openly hostile interaction I don't think find it necessary to nit pick a persons face, demeanor or energy. Granted I don't like feeling like I'm aggravating you but at the same time I'm also a grown up and shouldn't look for someone to ease my discomfort.  I should be able to tell myself, it's all good, the person is here to do a job so I'm not gonna waste time wondering if I'm bugging them cause at the end of the day Imma ask for what I need and the understanding is the staff is there to accommodate those requests. Why the hell do we play mind games with ourselves and then make it mandatory for service personal to display exaggerated behaviors in order to ease the mind fucks we create in our own minds. 

All I require is that you are gracious and polite and non combative or rude. I don't need exaggerated reassurances of your mood cause at the end of the day do we really care about their mood? No we don't cause to be perfectly honest, their at work and there is an understanding of what's going on so all this fakery is unnecessary. Let's be honest, we all know that work is work and people aren't serving you because they are just such swell people who sing with the animals and just can't wait to bestow sunshine upon your day so when guests want a service person to go about their service in this manner I just roll my eyes. 

Edited by Yours Truly
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4 hours ago, Chalby said:

And how is it that Brian hasn't clued in to the fact that any discord between Courtney and himself has always been instigated by Kevin the idiot Bru who has a knack for embellishing details?

Because Brian is clueless?

I think guests asking for strips dances from deckhands, gold speedos, etc., is horrifying.  I can't imagine asking the stews and deckhands to do more than their job if I was ever fortunate enough to be able to afford that kind of vacation.  I realize that makes me not a candidate for this show but I find it demeaning for the persons involved.

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So Kate must be leaving the series. There are indicators everywhere this season, and she says she wants to leave yachting and is considering her options.

I spotted her in a three-second advertising blurb for Spy Games, wearing a trench coat, hat and dark glasses.

I think Bravo is going to use her for something different. I think Lee is done, unless he really wants the money.

It was fun seeing Kate's first yacht.

I laughed at the almost jaunty Lee, whose spirits picked up at the thought of the charter ending. He actually laughed, cracked jokes and amused himself by goosing the crew and guests. He can't wait for production to end.

Oh Courtney, what happened to your dignity? Sniveling about the loathsome Brian. Perhaps it was producer-driven.

Have we ever seen production force the two genders into two separate vehicles repeatedly?

Not sure if her news bosses want to see Jemele consume so much alcohol, even on vacation.

 

Edited by pasdetrois
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Quote

Not sure if her news bosses want to see Jemele consume so much alcohol, even on vacation.

This I agree with.. She really is a good sports journalist but has no barometer when it comes to pushing too far which is why she ran out of chances at ESPN..  

But the over drinking and especially the need to have a penis cake was just tacky on her part..  C'mon Jemele..., keep it classy.

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2 hours ago, pasdetrois said:

So Kate must be leaving the series. There are indicators everywhere this season, and she says she wants to leave yachting and is considering her options.

 

From your lips to the Bravo gods ears.

May she ride off into the sunset in the same clown car as Vicki and Tamra!

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19 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

we all know that work is work and people aren't serving you because they are just such swell people who sing with the animals and just can't wait to bestow sunshine upon your day so when guests want a service person to go about their service in this manner I just roll my eyes.

I thought the whole purpose of good service was that food and drinks show up. I don't want some overly friendly person smiling at me. I would be perfectly happy with a Kate level of service.

Edited to add, the best service is when you don't even notice your servers. Until the tip. Then you tip well.


 

Edited by nokat
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In Peter Lugers renowned steakhouse the waiters are famous for being nasty. I would never go back. Why would you want to deal with someone who has a nasty face on all the time. Jemele was right the first time.  It’s the hospitality industry so it behooves you to be hospitable.

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7 hours ago, nokat said:

I thought the whole purpose of good service was that food and drinks show up. I don't want some overly friendly person smiling at me. I would be perfectly happy with a Kate level of service.

Edited to add, the best service is when you don't even notice your servers. Until the tip. Then you tip well.


 

You see! And this is why I think it’s very annoying when you have those guests that want to suggest that their be a “friendlier” vibe or that someone needs to “perform” with more positive energy or whatever.. Not everyone wants that level of ass kissing and would actually consider it a negative so lets just let people in the service industry manage their demeanor professionally and not rate them based on how animated they are or are not as long as they stay within fair and acceptable levels of behavior. 

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8 hours ago, nokat said:

I thought the whole purpose of good service was that food and drinks show up. I don't want some overly friendly person smiling at me. I would be perfectly happy with a Kate level of service.

Edited to add, the best service is when you don't even notice your servers. Until the tip. Then you tip well.


 

Yes! Thank you! The finest restaurant I’ve been to had servers that faded into the background. I remember looking at my water glass and just as I was thinking it needed a refill, a stealthy server refilled it.

My wants and desires were anticipated before even I recognized them and there were no extraneous interactions that took away from our table conversations.

The wine steward was particularly skillful in figuring out our wine knowledge and working within that.

I guess I’m getting off track with my happy restaurant memories. 😄

But I have no memory of the server’s name nor if they smiled at me.

 

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On 1/31/2020 at 7:16 AM, Yours Truly said:

It does bug me when people expect some overt grandiose behavior from service staff. Being in the service industry shouldn't equate to being a dancing monkey. I get that there should be a warmth to the interactions but at the same time I really wish people would stop requiring particular body language or that a person exude a certain level of positive energy.

First of all, everyone has a different idea of what's enough, what's too much, etc. etc. so I think it's just fair all around to accept when a person is doing their duties and performing their tasks. As long as it's not some openly hostile interaction I don't think find it necessary to nit pick a persons face, demeanor or energy. Granted I don't like feeling like I'm aggravating you but at the same time I'm also a grown up and shouldn't look for someone to ease my discomfort.  I should be able to tell myself, it's all good, the person is here to do a job so I'm not gonna waste time wondering if I'm bugging them cause at the end of the day Imma ask for what I need and the understanding is the staff is there to accommodate those requests. Why the hell do we play mind games with ourselves and then make it mandatory for service personal to display exaggerated behaviors in order to ease the mind fucks we create in our own minds. 

All I require is that you are gracious and polite and non combative or rude. I don't need exaggerated reassurances of your mood cause at the end of the day do we really care about their mood? No we don't cause to be perfectly honest, their at work and there is an understanding of what's going on so all this fakery is unnecessary. Let's be honest, we all know that work is work and people aren't serving you because they are just such swell people who sing with the animals and just can't wait to bestow sunshine upon your day so when guests want a service person to go about their service in this manner I just roll my eyes. 

Exactly. As long as she's not channeling Mrs. Danvers, it's all good.

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1 hour ago, greyflannel said:

Exactly. As long as she's not channeling Mrs. Danvers, it's all good.

Or Simone from earlier in the charter where she just watched and didn’t ask if they need anything. 
On WHHL, Jemelle did say that she understood more the vibe she was picking up having watched the episodes. I do think Kate should have made it so the guests didn’t feel that tension or her mood. I wonder if Jemelle would have picked up anything if she wasn’t a self admitted super fan who came in with expectations of how Kate would act.

Edited by biakbiak
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I mean, let's call a flower a flower!  Kate's been nothing but professional a bunch of years, yet she gets kinda snarky sometimes.  Don't we all?? I  want her to have a happy and productive life just like I want US ALL to have happy lives! Is that a bad thing??

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4 hours ago, goofygirl said:

I mean, let's call a flower a flower!  Kate's been nothing but professional a bunch of years, yet she gets kinda snarky sometimes.  Don't we all?? I  want her to have a happy and productive life just like I want US ALL to have happy lives! Is that a bad thing??

Just think if we all were followed and had our comments recorded. I've mumbled some things that may have involved something physically impossible. Most of us just want someone who gets shit done.
 

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On 1/27/2020 at 11:32 PM, Caseysgirl said:

I felt bad for Courtney because Brian’s behavior follows a pattern I’ve seen before. She was barely interested in him or a relationship and he was falling all over himself for her. Finally, the walls break down and she starts to return the interest and now the chase is over and he has to be mean to her so she’ll be sure to get the message he’s not into her instead of manning up and saying that, “yes, it was just a fling”.  Been there.

Not as bad as, but reminds me of, Kelly and Jennice ... he pursued her hard, but when the chase was up and she actually fell for him, he was a complete dick. With the icing on the cake being at the reunion show when he was talking about how the fans were saying he was too hot for her. And when people were taken aback by the comment and Jennice looked clearly humiliated by him, he jumps out of the frying pan and into the fire with a dick comment - something like, "No, no ... it's okay, I'm not all about looks anyway ..." 

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2 hours ago, Teri313 said:

Not as bad as, but reminds me of, Kelly and Jennice ... he pursued her hard, but when the chase was up and she actually fell for him, he was a complete dick. With the icing on the cake being at the reunion show when he was talking about how the fans were saying he was too hot for her. And when people were taken aback by the comment and Jennice looked clearly humiliated by him, he jumps out of the frying pan and into the fire with a dick comment - something like, "No, no ... it's okay, I'm not all about looks anyway ..." 

Kelley was such a d!ck that season - and yet, it pales in comparison to the brus of the current incarnation... hopefully Kelley has matured, there was hope for him back then... Ashton and his posse? Not so much. Gawd I hope he gets DRAGGED at the reunion.

 

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