S13.E05: Week 5: Norway

[OnceSane]

Quote

Rachel and a handsome suitor embrace the oyster culture of Bluffton, S.C. After the rose ceremony, Rachel and the remaining bachelors head to Oslo, Norway, where she and one lucky guy rappel down a giant Olympic ski jump. Later, Rachel takes bitter rivals on the dreaded two-on-one date.

[KikiBda]

Why did she pick up the rose if she was sending him home?

[awaken]

 The look on Rachel's face with Jack stone in the carriage was priceless! Why does jack need to be called "jack stone"  as if it's in the third person?   He has weird facial expressions, does odd things with his mouth, and has a veneers :/

Lee strikes me as an angry, dangerous drunk. Shades of chad.  He has a mean looking face.

Edited June 27, 2017 by awaken

[Ohwell]

43 minutes ago, KikiBda said:

Why did she pick up the rose if she was sending him home?

I know!  What is wrong with her?  

Granted, Jack Stone gave off a creepy vibe with his veneers and the way he would hold his head down and look up at her as he was talking to her,but he didn't deserve to be treated like that.  He's probably not aware of it but I do hope that when he saw himself on tv, he could see that he looked creepy.  All he has to do is hold his head up.  

[GracieK]

They shagged! Shag is one of my all time favorite movies! 

[awaken]

Jack stone was also creepy with acting as if he knew her dads sense of humor when they'd never met.  Rachel didn't seem happy with that. 

Who the heck are Adam and Matt?  I have no recollection of them!

 She and Bryan seemed to have a fun and relaxing time together, but I can't get past the cheek implants! Was hoping he would break out some old pictures so we could compare. 

[TomGirl]

Girl, you're killing me with that gold glitter eye shadow.  I need my sunglasses just to watch you!  That said, Rachel looked beautiful in this episode.  Loved the black cut-out rose ceremony dress.

[TomGirl]

Quote

1 hour ago, KikiBda said:

Why did she pick up the rose if she was sending him home?

Clearly the leads are told to do this.  They all do it every time.

[dizzyd]

The Jack date was awkward, she was so not into him. I I found her dismissal of him to be very sincere, which is a refreshing change for this show.  

Hellooo on that slit on the RC dress, nice. Nice way for Tickle monster to leave.

Too much of Lee the snake for my taste, so of course editing has to throw in a clip of an actual snake. Leezard, good one Kenny.  Kenny's daughter is too cute. 

Dean is still my favorite, not for Rachel though, he maybe good for Kristina from Nicks season in age and difficult childhood.

Still feel Bryan is playing a role for the show, I'm not buying what he's selling. He says all the perfect things, but they don't make me go awww. I did like his conversation with Kenny though. And no one else there seems better for her.

[Armchair Critic]

Shut up Kenny, he is vindictive and has a mean mouth I could see him acting that way with a girlfriend too so run Rachel run! She's not into Lee either so just let them both go.

[JenE4]

Team Kenny!!!! I am rooting for this man to marry Rachel or to be the next Bachelor! 

Rachel fakes a communicable disease to avoid kissing Jack Stone. Although I'm shocked that in Bachelor History an entire cast hasn't come down with mono yet--with Chris Harrison, instead of bearing roses, delivering trays of chicken soup to bedridden contestants ringing bells like in the episode of The Brady Bunch when all the kids were sick.

"We got a 1-8-7 in progress." I don't know, Rachel, I'm more surprised that it took all the way to 187 before whomever developed this crime coding system got to murder. Shouldn't murder be #1? What 186 other crimes are more critical? 

Falling in love?!? Waiting for the talking head rappelling pun about literally falling for Rachel. Huh, funny how Rachel's illness suddenly cleared up in time to make out with Bryan!

Um, why is Dean the only person wearing a jock strap OVER his handball unitard? Uh, maybe I don't want to know the answer to that. But otherwise I would like to file a motion that the customary rose ceremony suits are replaced by handball unitards.

Aw, Kenny crying to his adorable daughter! But I think this means he's going home and this was filmed after the 2:1 with the "I'll see you very, very, very soon [tears quickly dry up] um, I mean soon enough" flub.

"Disingenuous" count: 2. Kenny on Lee, and Rachel on Josiah. After two weeks in a row, Disingenuous has officially entered Bachelor lexicon. See also Wrong Reasons.

PLEASE leave Lee on a fjord as Rachel and Kenny fly off in the chopper, like when Ali left "Guard and Protect Your Heart" Kasey on an iceberg!!!!!

"Onion tiiiiiime!" Huh? Why haven't we seen what "onion tiiiiiiime!" is?! 

OMG, Lee is lying about ALL of this, isn't he?!

Uh, oh, here come the cross examinations!

Rachel and Kenny are all bundled up and shivering, while Lee is wearing a light long-sleeved t-shirt with the sleeves pushed up. Proof he's not cold-blooded and, hence, not a snake? Or maybe it shows he's overly hot blooded? Does Satan bring the heat of Hades with him?

[Superpole2000]

1 minute ago, dizzyd said:

The Jack date was awkward, she was so not into him.

The poor guy getting dumped wasn't privy to Rachel's negative commentary or the odd background music while the date was occurring. It probably seems way more awkward when seeing it post-edit. Nevertheless, he should have noticed how uncomfortable Rachel was when he kissed her. She resorted to the ever-awkward double hand hold to prevent any intense hugs and/or gropes. This is such a classic move that the premier episode of Seinfeld centered around it.

Once again, the Lee part of the show did it no favours. Contrived drama makes me turn the channel now, not strive to tune in next week. Dial it back a bit, producers.

[leighdear]

I think Kenny is aggressive and obnoxious.  I don't think he's sweet, innocent or a nice guy.  His cat-calling to lee was getting a bit hysterical there at the end of the shot, so I think he's tipped over the edge. 

And will somebody tell these guys to ease up on the tattoos?  Damn, they've got more ink per square foot than the average outlaw biker gang.  

[chocolatine]

"She and I's relationship" - oh, Peter! He sounded like he was trying to convince himself to fall in love with Rachel.

Jack Stone does not know how to read a room. How awkward to interrupt Rachel with some more gushing as she was trying to break up with him.

I'm completely over the Lee/Kenny drama. Way too much time spent on something that's not remotely entertaining.

I did enjoy the Norway travel porn and the shot of Adam Jr in his handball uniform.

[TiredMe]

I kind of tuned out with the Kenny lee stuff. It's just not fun or interesting. Bad call by the producers on who's  bringing the drama. They both need to go.

[Ohwell]

Kenny is a wrestler, and wrestlers put on a "show" with each other, so his "aggressiveness" towards another man, even Lee, is not surprising to me.   Now he may genuinely not like Lee, but I also think that that's the role that producers have given Kenny, to be Lee's antagonist. 

I would love to see Kenny, Will, Alex, Dean, Iggy, Diggy, and Anthony on BIP, where they can just relax and have fun .  

Edited June 27, 2017 by Ohwell

[chocolatine]

48 minutes ago, JenE4 said:

Rachel and Kenny are all bundled up and shivering, while Lee is wearing a light long-sleeved t-shirt with the sleeves pushed up. Proof he's not cold-blooded and, hence, not a snake?

@JenE4, you win the internet today!

ETA: Now I can't get the Paula Abdul song out of my head.

Edited June 27, 2017 by chocolatine

[roses]

31 minutes ago, dizzyd said:

Still feel Bryan is playing a role for the show, I'm not buying what he's selling. He says all the perfect things, but they don't make me go awww. I did like his conversation with Kenny though. And no one else there seems better for her.

This, there is just something about him that is giving me player vibes.

Also was not a fan of the early I'm falling in love with you reminded of Robby during JoJo's season.   

Edited June 27, 2017 by roses

[LakeGal]

How many episodes are we going to see Kenny with a bloody eye before it actually happens?

[phlebas]

1 minute ago, LakeGal said:

How many episodes are we going to see Kenny with a bloody eye before it actually happens?

This is the most anticipated "accidentally walked into a door frame" scene in TV history.

[TomGirl]

Peter does absolutely nothing for me.  I think he's pretty but not handsome.  He's got that Jason Priestly 90210 look, and I was never a big Brandon fan.

I really like Will.  He might be my favorite.  But I doubt he's gonna win.

[awaken]

I was wondering about the jock strap over the unitard look- not knowing anything about handball, I didn't know if that was totally weird or normal!  

[Pachengala]

It hasn't started yet here on the west coast but all I need to know is that Lee and Kenny are still around to know that I can skip it. Rachel isn't into either of them--the show's not even trying to hide it--so why should we care about their drama? This isn't Big Brother, producers. WE DON'T CARE. 

[Alapaki]

Is wearing gaudy oversized rings on the outside of your winter gloves a thing?

(otherwise, episode-wise, fuck you with a stick Lee, you ignorant hillbilly piece of shit; but . . . I'm smiling when I say it, so its okay)

[dbell1]

Are the producers holding Rachel's dog hostage? That's the only reason I can come up with for Lee still being there.

Glad tickle monster is gone, he looked like his face was melting. There are some odd looking guys this season.

[nutty1]

Lee is a true villain. Not the kind you can snark about, but a really nasty person.
I wonder if Rachel feels like a fool watching it all play out now.

My favorites are Peter, Dean, Will and Alex. Bryan doesn't bother me. The rest can leave.

 

I am already figuring out who will be the best Bachelor out of the bunch.

Bryan would kiss every girl, Peter would be the best dressed, Will would be the happiest, Dean would make everyone laugh. And Lee would make them all walk out on night one!

[truthaboutluv]

Bless her heart, Rachel is trying so hard to make Peter be into her and it just ain't happening. She practically climbed him like a tree in the hot tub and grabbed his head and went in on his mouth and still all he could muster was some half hearted back stroking and some mild reciprocation but the whole thing was just meh. I am sorry, I have tried and I have read all the comments about how reserved he is, how much of a gentleman he is, etc. etc. but I don't buy it. Plain and simple, I don't think Peter is into Rachel. I think he likes her well enough as a person but in terms of sexual chemistry and passion, nope, don't see it.

Also, was I the only one who thought it was a kind of rude and well icky for Rachel to go play hot tub tonsil hockey with Peter while on a group date, so a group of guys are just sitting there like idiots simply waiting for her to be done with her hot tub action? I mean don't get me wrong, by all means, have her hot tub action, it is par for this show after all, but save that shit for 1 on 1 dates. More and more I'm starting to agree with the guys from Two Bros and A Brick recap show who called Rachel the horniest Bachelorette since Kaitlyn.

Meanwhile, canned lines or not, smarmy or not, for some wondering why Rachel is so into Bryan, it's because she's just as sexually and passionately aggressive as he is. They match each other in that sense which is why their makeouts end up being so intense and they were practically eating each other's faces off a mere hours after meeting each other. Bryan got so much crap in comments about how he kissed Rachel that first night but if you watch their first kiss, there was a point where he pulled back slightly, gauging her reaction and she went back in full force and he responded.

Sure that kind of passion can fizzle and certainly isn't enough to hang forever and ever on but with the short amount of time these people have on this farce of finding their husband/wife, I can see why Rachel would gravitate towards Bryan who she has amazing physical chemistry with, clearly enjoys spending time with and who more importantly, is just as into her as she's with him. 

Edited June 27, 2017 by truthaboutluv

[Armchair Critic]

42 minutes ago, Alapaki said:

I'm smiling when I say it, so its okay

And if you whisper you can say anything you want to and it's not aggressive.

[Alapaki]

3 minutes ago, truthaboutluv said:

They match each other in that sense which is why their makeouts end up being so intense and they were practically eating each other's faces off a mere hours after meeting each other. Bryan got so much crap in comments about how he kissed Rachel that first night but if you watch their first kiss, there was a point where he pulled back slightly, gauging her reaction and she went back in full force and he responded.

Sure that kind of passion can fizzle and certainly isn't enough to hang forever and ever on but with the short amount of time these people have on this farce of finding their husband/wife, I can see why Rachel would gravitate towards Bryan who she has amazing physical chemistry with, clearly enjoys spending time with and who more importantly, is just as into her as she's with him. 

I agree.  She started the one-on-one date claiming that while it clear they had physical chemistry, she wanted to see if there was any deeper connection.  Then, after he said he was "falling in love with her", she said that she wanted to (paraphrasing) "reward" him, or "reassure" him after he made that non-physical-connection move.  And, what did she do?  Moved in to kiss him.  

Combine that with the way her eyes glaze over when other guys are talking to her (especially when they're not talking about her), and I think she's either completely checked out of any other guy, and/or she's just as much into hooking up as any of the other Bachelor/Ettes have been.

[CaliCat]

1 hour ago, phlebas said:

This is the most anticipated "accidentally walked into a door frame" scene in TV history.

This cracked me up!  I was thinking maybe he got hit with a helicopter blade. 

[Ms Blue Jay]

2 hours ago, awaken said:

Jack stone was also creepy with acting as if he knew her dads sense of humor when they'd never met.  Rachel didn't seem happy with that. 

Did he actually say "I love parents"?  Oh my god.  That was so weird. I feel bad for the guy, but it was just sooooooo uncomfortable.  That tilted face, those wide open eyes, those blindingly white teeth.  LOL!!

Rachel:  If you took me to Dallas, what would you want to do with me?
Jack Stone:  Lock the door.  

[MakeMeLaugh]

Mr MML thought Jackstone stole Nick Viall's mannerisms, the smile, the looking up at the camera under his eyelashes, the way he sits, all the little endearing traits that made me want to vomit every time he was in front of any camera he could get near.

[judie]

Bryan probably recycled those lines from the last dating show he was on. I feel like he's always trying to make a moment for TV rather than letting things happen naturally. So tiresome.

I think Peter is into Rachel. He isn't as over the top as Bryan is with it, but I think the physical chemistry is there. If it wasn't there, I think Rachel is perceptive enough to know it, and I don't see her as the kind of woman who would beg and plead for some dude to be into her.

[Alapaki]

FWIW, Bryan got the metaphorical "leap of faith" date. 

And, I could swear that when they kissed at the bottom of that rappel the music was the exact same schmaltz they play at the FRC when the proposal is accepted and the "winning" couple kiss.

[JoBeth70]

"Disingenuous" is the new "emotional intelligence".

[yorklee2]

Count me in as another who thinks Jack Stone was a little creepy and totally not aware of the clues she was giving off. I had second hand embarrassment for him. I mean come on couldn't he tell she didn't want to kiss him? He kept talking about how much he was really getting to know her and how well it was going. Based on what?? And someone needs to tell him quick that he needs to stop with the head pointed down and those little slivers of eyes pointed back up at a woman. That was just creepy.

I also agree about there's something not right about Bryan. He's seems sincere on one hand but...he's just too smooth.  When Rachel said it sounded too good to be true she needed to play close attention to that inner voice or instinct that was telling her that. Where's the asking questions to really get to know her or any future plans. Peter may be on the reserved side but I give him points for asking important future oriented questions. He and Rachel have talked a lot about what their future may entail.

I love Dean and Alex. Dean is handsome, emotionally intelligent, and fun to be around. Ditto Alex. He's really starting to grow on me. I love the almost boyish glee he has when he's around Rachel. And it seems very genuine. Not sure Dean is old enough to carry the Bach but hey he can't be any worse than Ben H. who was young also. I can imagine Alex would make a good Bach but I think he would be a better fit for BIP as it would showcase his adorable fun side. Regardless I hope these two go far.

Edited June 27, 2017 by yorklee2

[Armchair Critic]

58 minutes ago, yorklee2 said:

Dean is handsome, emotionally intelligent, and fun to be around

He's my favorite which means he won't be F1.

[Wings]

Bryan is playing the part of 'man sweeps woman off feet.'   It seems to be working a little.  I see, proceed with caution in Rachael, though.  He will probably break her down.  Maybe there is a sincere guy behind the cliches, time will tell. 

Lee is so transparent yet some fell face first into his trap.  I wonder if they learned that ignoring was they way to go when they watched themselves.   

Peter was expecting or wanting that group rose; he is into her.  Probably time to step it up!   He is drop dead gorgeous in his modeling pictures. 

One more episode to get through this ridiculous conflict production created by casting a full frontal racist.  How stupid.  

This show has been wearing thin for me for years now, yet I do not turn away.  

[backformore]

1 minute ago, wings707 said:

Bryan is playing the part of 'man sweeps woman off feet.'   It seems to be working a little.  I see, proceed with caution in Rachael, though.  He will probably break her down.  Maybe there is a sincere guy behind the cliches, time will tell. 

Yeah, Bryan gives me the impression that if he was on the season with Kaitlyn, Andi, Jojo, etc - he would deliver the exact same lines, the same way. 

[waving feather]

Aw, I actually thought Rachel and Bryan are very compatible. They have the same temperament and goes all in physically.

[yorklee2]

20 minutes ago, wings707 said:

Peter was expecting or wanting that group rose; he is into her.  Probably time to step it up!   He is drop dead gorgeous in his modeling pictures. 

I noticed this also. He even made the comment that not getting the rose made him question and step back a little from trusting what she's feeling. His whole persona screams reserve and caution. I have a feeling that, although he's been in the modeling world, he's not totally comfortable with kissing and making out in front of the cameras. He's seems perfectly fine and comfortable when he and Rachel are talking and getting to know each other. 

But I agree he needs to step it up instead of retreating.  

Edited June 27, 2017 by yorklee2

[Armchair Critic]

2 hours ago, truthaboutluv said:

She practically climbed him like a tree in the hot tub and grabbed his head and went in on his mouth

She was the aggressor who suggested the hot tub, she is really into Peter physically.

[AudreyHorne]

I think that Bryan is definitely making it to the Fantasy Suite and I know there's NO WAY he's going to choke in the Fantasy Suite so...

Rachel is way into him.

[hnygrl]

Know what I kept saying whenever Rachel would say there's something missing in Kenny on their date? "he's not Bryan!" He's so perfect on paper, we should have some chemistry, something. ...yeah, you would.  If he were Bryan...can it BE any clearer? She is gone over the man. Just...gone.

[tvguru94]

It's frustrating enough that the rose ceremony is not at the end of the episode, but then they tried to play it up like there was some sort of suspense. We all knew Lee would get the last rose, because of the "dramatic two-night event!" I'll be glad when the Lee/Kenny feud is off my tv.

My favorite part was at the very end when Will used the phrase "crotchular region."

[HappyDancex2]

What a bunch of buffoons behaving badly.  This was not a good episode, save for the singlets.  This is my first season of the Bachelorette....i have no frame of reference but this isn't a stellar crop to choose from.  

[piewarmer]

3 hours ago, CaliCat said:

This cracked me up!  I was thinking maybe he got hit with a helicopter blade. 

shredded by a flying false eyelash.

[XoxoGG]

Ok I must get this off my chest.

 

 

Is it me or is there something off about Peter? I'm not even talking about his interest or lack there of-of Rachel but everytime Peter talks, I just get this weird vibe from him. I never noticed it until the last episode. Like, the more talking and screen time he gets IDK it's just something in my gut that is telling this man is OFF. I watch this show with my sister and she said the same thing. Hmmmmmm

 

Anyway, it's crazy how much of a Peter fan I was coming into this season and right up until their first one on one. Now the guy has fallen off my radar as far as favorites.

 

Ironically I didn't think him not wanting to kiss her all the time but talk was bad. I would want to talk too and get to know someone before I started kissing them down. Unfortunately, you don't really have that luxury in this environment. So I kind of give him a pass there.

Edited June 27, 2017 by XoxoGG

[Suzysite]

Kenny reminds me of a bratty younger sibling who pokes you in the ribs when the parents aren't looking, and then is all innocent smiles and sweetness when he gets called out.  A stealth a-hole.   Whereas Lee flies his a-hole flag high for all to see.  So naturally, he's going to get more of the blame.

[Catronia]

I'm so glad many of you mentioned Jack's weird face/head positions. He was consistently holding his head in a very submissive position -- either lowered way down or tilted to the side. I don't think that would appeal to a woman like Rachel (or me), and he didn't seem to hear her or read her signals (especially when she obviously didn't want to kiss him).

Bryan? She's certainly into him. Whether it's mutual... who knows?

Well, I finally know who Will is, and he seems pretty cool.

Oh Lord, Kenny and Lee. Lee is irredeemably horrendous, but WHY does Kenny insist on poking the Slytherin? Just let it go, Kenny. Let. It. Go.

Edited June 27, 2017 by Catronia