S09.E11: A Countess No More

[escatefromny]

Bethany and the seafood spread at her "party"?????  I know I'm not misremembering her hysterical breakdown at Dorinda's Berkshires home after she insisted on announcing she was allergic to seafood - instead of just passing on the sushi - and overbearing Heather tried to find her a substitute.  Since then, there have been several scenes with her shoving seafood into her mouth.  I remembering thinking at the time that her "allergy" was just an attention device, certainly seems to be the case.

For a gathering of 6 people who are, allegedly, your "friends" the Bethany party seemed a bit overstated.   Both "parties" tonight just reeked of producer set ups, not fun. (Although, ha!, that Ramona's was left out and had to settle for hazy, flashback highlights).

And Sonja sounds more like a prostitute everyday.  She was blathering on about "no kissing"?!?!?!

Edited June 15, 2017 by escatefromny

[Pickles]

21 minutes ago, howiveaddict said:

He's at the Regency!  Or whatever it's called.

Luann told Andy that Tom (and I guess Luann too), still go to the Regency and they get everything free! I guess all of the publicity. Crazy. Tom probably goes there more than ever now.

[izabella]

15 minutes ago, hoodooznoodooz said:

Yikes. In the preview, Ramona with her hair-- bangs, wisps, and all-- slicked back into an extreme ponytail.

That was absolutely horrendous.  Was she copying Tinsley's hairstyle?

[UsernameFatigue]

Well, that was a fun epi. I loved Beth's party, and the personalized Christmas balls though I would prefer one without the name on it. 

So Luann thinks that her father sent Tom to her? I'd almost consider that a form of child abuse. How odd (OK, not really) that Luann has to keep telling us over and over (and over) what a great guy Tom is. I married a great guy, and people have often told me that before and after our marriage. Never once have I had to "sell" him in the 20 years we have been together. His actions speak louder than my words ever could. Unfortunately, Tom's actions also speak louder than Lu's words ever could. And WTF was with that choke hold? Lu seemed more than comfortable with it. Just downright creepy in my books, and especially in public to boot. 

Wow, was Dorinda passive aggressively sending signals about her true feeling about the wedding? Forgets to book a flight, forgets when she is supposed to be with the bride and other bridesmaids the day of the wedding, forgets to bring her bridesmaid dress that day, and tells Lu and Tom that she has had enough of celebrating their wedding. Ha!

Frenchie seems to be out of central casting. And if he is "real", where was he living before he moved in with Sonja? I've seen homeless people (and I am not in the least dissing homeless people) with more possessions than his which barely filled the corner of Sonja's bedroom. He seems more in need of a place to stay than Tins did. 

[WireWrap]

2 minutes ago, UsernameFatigue said:

 

Frenchie seems to be out of central casting. And if he is "real", where was he living before he moved in with Sonja? I've seen homeless people (and I am not in the least dissing homeless people) with more possessions than his which barely filled the corner of Sonja's bedroom. He seems more in need of a place to stay than Tins did. 

Nahhh, I do think he is a rent a date but I think this speaks more about Sonja's desperation for a storyline focusing in on her, not her roommate Tinsley! LOL

[beesknees]

• I'm going to get roasted for this but what was up with Avery's face tonight?  I'm talking about the area between her eyes.

She looked like a cross between someone with a Frankenstein forehead and fetal alcohol syndrome.  I couldn't stop staring to the point that I was missing the dialogue.

I don't remember Avery's face looking so odd and puffy like that.  My friend immediately said botox injections that have not settled down yet (she gets them regularly).  At 22 yrs old?  I say no but the look (whatever it is) is unnatural.

[hoodooznoodooz]

I am going to have trouble keeping Edgar and Chad straight.

Chad looks really weird hanging out at a party with Carole, Ramona and John M.

Did John lecherously tell Carole that he could shrink her dress down to a smaller (tighter) size?

WWHL: Jill's hair looks really pretty. The color is lovely.

Lu said Tom has a really good sense of humor, but I think she is the one who will have to have an exceptional sense of humor during their marriage.

Love Susan from NY's question for Lu.

[ElDosEquis]

6 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

Nahhh, I do think he is a rent a date but I think this speaks more about Sonja's desperation for a storyline focusing in on her, not her roommate Tinsley! LOL

If we thought the Ex-countess' love connection was saccharine?

Wait until Sonja gets rolling along and SHE gets engaged?

How do we know if Frenchy isn't doing the show to keep his work visa?

[diadochokinesis]

1 hour ago, Mozelle said:

I like Carole, but that she engaged in speculation about what Tom may or may not do in the bedroom was not a good look. It seems to a lot of people (myself included) that Tom and LuAnn are trying to prove so much that their union is the real deal, and who knows why Tom has never been married at this stage in his life, but leave the innuendoes alone.

That said, I totally get why Carole was asking questions in Chinatown. She, like me, is not an adventurous eater. Even if something is labeled--like blueberry lavender ice cream. Ha!--I want to hear from the server's mouth what's going in the plate. 

 

I agree that Lu does seem to be trying extra hard to convince people about this wedding but i wonder how much of it is she is trying to convince herself. The whole first time married thing doesn't strike me as being unusual.  My aunt got married for the first time at 52 and they have been married for 15 years now. Really great guy. Lost his first wife to cancer. We love him, it works. 

1 hour ago, HunterHunted said:

The chocolate chip cookies drink was from Dominque Ansel inventor of the cronut.

http://dominiqueansel.com/cookie-shots-come-to-new-york/

I love that Avery's friends barely dignified Ramona's suggestion of this multi generation hang. No "that would be cool." They straight asked if these friends had sons their age and that is the only shit they cared about.

 

That whole dinner was just all types of awkward. Avery's friends don't want to hang out with a 60 year old twwoman. They want to hang out with Avery. I did enjoy the sideye they gave Avery when Ramona suggested Monday dinners.  LOL. 

21 minutes ago, ElDosEquis said:

I bet beffy made her 'stupid' assistant take about 12 shots before she picked the 'best' one.

What is it with the underarm vagina? 

 

I'm assuming you are a man but two things:

1) Some woman just have that.  It is how the breast tissue extends. 

2) Do we really have to body shame?  You don't like Bethenny.  Fine. But can we not body shame?

18 minutes ago, escatefromny said:

Bethany and the seafood spread at her "party"?????  I know I'm not misremembering her hysterical breakdown at Dorinda's Berkshires home after she insisted on announcing she was allergic to seafood - instead of just passing on the sushi - and overbearing Heather tried to find her a substitute.  Since then, there have been several scenes with her shoving seafood into her mouth.  I remembering thinking at the time that her "allergy" was just an attention device, certainly seems to be the case.

For a gathering of 6 people who are, allegedly, your "friends" the Bethany party seemed a bit overstated.   Both "parties" tonight just reeked of producer set ups, not fun. (Although, ha!, that Ramona's was left out and had to settle for hazy, flashback highlights).

And Sonja sounds more like a prostitute everyday.  She was blathering on about "no kissing"?!?!?!

 

She stole that from Pretty Woman!  Come on!  Come up with original lines!

[CSunshine76]

Countess Luann, who wrote a book on etiquette, continues to have wedding related events and invite women who weren't invited to the wedding.  No, just NO! You sure as hell don't invite people to pre or post wedding parties that you didn't invite to the wedding.  God, how many events does one need?

Ramona, of course Avery's friends think you're great and hang out... you are buying their food and alcohol.  When you are in college you deal with parents like her if they are picking up the tab!! 

These women are exhausting.

[sasha206]

2 hours ago, AnnaL said:

Aww disappointed, it was not a drunken speech. 

It was a crazy speech but it would have been funnier had Dorinda been drunk. 

Why is it that when Tom talks about the wedding he always talks about if Luann married herself? he is always talking about how special this was for her and how happy she was and how she worked to make everything perfect. How about you Tom? How do you really feel? 

Tom strikes me as someone who is about to lose his inheritance if he doesn't marry by X date.

[WireWrap]

3 minutes ago, CSunshine76 said:

Countess Luann, who wrote a book on etiquette, continues to have wedding related events and invite women who weren't invited to the wedding.  No, just NO! You sure as hell don't invite people to pre or post wedding parties that you didn't invite to the wedding.  God, how many events does one need?

Ramona, of course Avery's friends think you're great and hang out... you are buying their food and alcohol.  When you are in college you deal with parents like her if they are picking up the tab!! 

These women are exhausting.

You do if your boss/aka production tells you to have a "non-invited to the wedding party"!LOL

[hoodooznoodooz]

4 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Tom strikes me as someone who is about to lose his inheritance if he doesn't marry by X date.

Bingo! We have a winner!

[sasha206]

Watching the show tonight, I felt sorry for Carole in a way.  I don't believe for one second she's happy about Adam moving out. I think she's enjoyed this relationship but she knows it's inevitable.  

[ElDosEquis]

8 minutes ago, beesknees said:

• I'm going to get roasted for this but what was up with Avery's face tonight?  I'm talking about the area between her eyes.

She looked like a cross between someone with a Frankenstein forehead and fetal alcohol syndrome.  I couldn't stop staring to the point that I was missing the dialogue.

I don't remember Avery's face looking so odd and puffy like that.  My friend immediately said botox injections that have not settled down yet (she gets them regularly).  At 22 yrs old?  I say no but the look (whatever it is) is unnatural.

Oh man.

That is harsh........but it's funny.

Ramona probably has brainwashed Avery into believing all that injection/lift bullshit is GOOD for her.

One of the funnier scenes was Avery standing in front of the Lulu (ex-countess) and checking her out, top to bottom.

[UsernameFatigue]

6 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

Tom strikes me as someone who is about to lose his inheritance if he doesn't marry by X date.

Say, by his 50th birthday??? Lol. 

[sasha206]

One thing that struck me tonight:  Dorinda looks like she's had nothing done to her face.   Carole and Bethenny look almost scary with the amount of work they've had done.  

[ElDosEquis]

10 minutes ago, diadochokinesis said:

I agree that Lu does seem to be trying extra hard to convince people about this wedding but i wonder how much of it is she is trying to convince herself. The whole first time married thing doesn't strike me as being unusual.  My aunt got married for the first time at 52 and they have been married for 15 years now. Really great guy. Lost his first wife to cancer. We love him, it works. 

That whole dinner was just all types of awkward. Avery's friends don't want to hang out with a 60 year old twwoman. They want to hang out with Avery. I did enjoy the sideye they gave Avery when Ramona suggested Monday dinners.  LOL. 

I'm assuming you are a man but two things:

1) Some woman just have that.  It is how the breast tissue extends. 

2) Do we really have to body shame?  You don't like Bethenny.  Fine. But can we not body shame?

She stole that from Pretty Woman!  Come on!  Come up with original lines!

So, A dick that shoots diamonds isn't man shaming?

I bet that is why beffy is cranky, she has an ass full of carbon?

[diadochokinesis]

13 minutes ago, CSunshine76 said:

Countess Luann, who wrote a book on etiquette, continues to have wedding related events and invite women who weren't invited to the wedding.  No, just NO! You sure as hell don't invite people to pre or post wedding parties that you didn't invite to the wedding.  God, how many events does one need?

Ramona, of course Avery's friends think you're great and hang out... you are buying their food and alcohol.  When you are in college you deal with parents like her if they are picking up the tab!! 

These women are exhausting.

To me, there is an exception though.  If you have a destination wedding that people couldn't afford to go to. Granted, this cast didn't have that problem. I agree that it is rude if people could have attended and you said no because they didn't support the marriage.  Then you don't invite them to the party to celebrate the marriage. 

2 minutes ago, ElDosEquis said:

So, A dick that shoots diamonds isn't man shaming?

I bet that is why beffy is cranky, she has an ass full of carbon?

Saying someone has a dick that shoots diamonds isn't body shaming. I also never said that I was ok with that. I felt it was crass but also a bit funny (the two aren't mutually exclusive). 

[HunterHunted]

20 minutes ago, CSunshine76 said:

Countess Luann, who wrote a book on etiquette, continues to have wedding related events and invite women who weren't invited to the wedding.  No, just NO! You sure as hell don't invite people to pre or post wedding parties that you didn't invite to the wedding.  God, how many events does one need?

Second receptions are unbelievably common in immigrant communities especially when the wedding occurred in the country the people emigrated from. It happens the other end way too. You get married and have a reception in the US, Canada, or UK and have a traditional ceremony and reception in the country you emigrated from.

Though my parents are immigrants, my brother ended up having a second reception because he and his wife got married in Minnesota in the dead of winter. No one from from our side was willing to schlep there, so they were never invited. The Minnesota reception had about 200 people. The reception in our hometown had about 500.

Edited June 15, 2017 by HunterHunted

[ScoobieDoobs]

Jeez, Frenchie is one slimy, slippery character.  He shouldn't stand out all that much in the sea of sleazy men who've been on this show -- and yet he does.  And speaking of slimy/sleazy/slippery characters . . . hello, Tom!  Oh, we know EXACTLY why you don't wanna wear a wedding ring, Tom.  Uh, why'd you wanna marry this one, Lu?  There was a line for this?  I'm still not getting his appeal.  He gives me the creeps.

Man, that venue for the after-wedding party was awful.  It looked like the unfinished basement in someone's tiny home in the 'burbs.  Now, there's nothing wrong with that, but aren't these supposed to be people with dough?  WTF?

[ElDosEquis]

1 minute ago, diadochokinesis said:

Saying someone has a dick that shoots diamonds isn't body shaming. I also never said that I was ok with that. I felt it was crass but also a bit funny (the two aren't mutually exclusive). 

I didn't say her vagina underarms were funny, they are hilarious.

[diadochokinesis]

2 minutes ago, ElDosEquis said:

I didn't say her vagina underarms were funny, they are hilarious.

But making fun of a part of a woman's body (that FYI, is actually common based on how your breast tissue lays) is body shaming. 

[WireWrap]

8 minutes ago, ScoobieDoobs said:

Jeez, Frenchie is one slimy, slippery character.  He shouldn't stand out all that much in the sea of sleazy men who've been on this show -- and yet he does.  And speaking of slimy/sleazy/slippery characters . . . hello, Tom!  Oh, we know EXACTLY why you don't wanna wear a wedding ring, Tom.  Uh, why'd you wanna marry this one, Lu?  There was a line for this?  I'm still not getting his appeal.  He gives me the creeps.

Man, that venue for the after-wedding party was awful.  It looked like the unfinished basement in someone's tiny home in the 'burbs.  Now, there's nothing wrong with that, but aren't these supposed to be people with dough?  WTF?

Payback from Bravo/production for Luann/Tom not allowing the wedding to be filmed for the show. LOL

1 minute ago, diadochokinesis said:

But making fun of a part of a woman's body (that FYI, is actually common based on how your breast tissue lays) is body shaming. 

A good, well fitting bra could/would correct that problem. I noticed, in the Berks episode when Bethenny was changing to leave, that her bras do not fit correctly. Also, whoever took the photo should have photo shopped it out or had her tuck the skin back into correct placement. Bethenny has large implants, maybe she needs to have them redone.

[bravofan27]

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And Sonja sounds more like a prostitute everyday.  She was blathering on about "no kissing"?!?!?!

hahaha. Yeah, I was thinking that sounded really "pretty woman." I guess her kisses just lead to love. Is she saying he was paying her? She didn't think that one through too well. 

Edited June 15, 2017 by bravofan27

[diadochokinesis]

4 minutes ago, WireWrap said:

Payback from Bravo/production for Luann/Tom not allowing the wedding to be filmed for the show. LOL

A good, well fitting bra could/would correct that problem. I noticed, in the Berks episode when Bethenny was changing to leave, that her bras do not fit correctly. Also, whoever took the photo should have photo shopped it out or had her tuck the skin back into correct placement. Bethenny has large implants, maybe she needs to have them redone.

1

It doesn't always though. I have it as does several friends. No matter the bra, they are still there. It can happen regardless of breast size too (mine are slightly bigger than Jules). I do agree with you though that Bethenny had a horrible fitting bra in the Berkshires. She did not fill the cups at all. They gave her a good bra when they did the bra party so it would be interesting to see if the bra changed that. 

[ElDosEquis]

4 minutes ago, diadochokinesis said:

But making fun of a part of a woman's body (that FYI, is actually common based on how your breast tissue lays) is body shaming. 

Hmmm, We can take on the man bashing on the thread, next?

------------------

When you have seen a few thousand breasts in various states of repair, a sense of humor helps.

[Teddybear]

LuAnn:  "I have somebody to play with all the time and I love my new playmate."   Um, did LuAnn get a dog or a husband?  Maybe they're one and the same in Tom.  

I find it so odd LuAnn had a party for all the people she didn't invite to her wedding.  It's embarrassing all the way around.  It would be one thing if it were a destination wedding far far away that people couldn't afford (not the case), or it was a wedding just for family (nope), or someone couldn't/didn't want to go (nope), but the people invited really wanted to go to the original wedding.  Does she recommend that in her etiquette book?  A party for second tier guests who didn't make the initial cut?  

Didn't like how Tom grabbed LuAnn by the neck when he kissed her at the party.  That was creepy.  

[NeverLate]

I thought Bethenny' s party looked a bit sad and sparse ,  and drinking from that luge? Umm, no.! 

We often go for Dim Sun, funny Carol knew nothing about it. Lavender ice cream, its lovely! She chooses chocolate.I bet she's boring in bed..lol! 

I thought Lu looked beautiful. I hope it works out for them. They looked very happy.

I'm not sure what's going on with Sonja, she seems very scattered. Frenchie's accent sort of sounded false,  from the morning with the eggs, to Lu's party, he sounded totally different. Is he another friend with benefits, with no place to live? LOL! 

Quote

I find it so odd LuAnn had a party for all the people she didn't invite to her wedding.  It's embarrassing all the way around.

Really? We've been to a couple of them. Enjoyed every minute. Different strokes etc...shrug.

Edited June 15, 2017 by F. M.

[ElDosEquis]

18 minutes ago, Teddybear said:

LuAnn:  "I have somebody to play with all the time and I love my new playmate."   Um, did LuAnn get a dog or a husband?  Maybe they're one and the same in Tom.  

I find it so odd LuAnn had a party for all the people she didn't invite to her wedding.  It's embarrassing all the way around.  It would be one thing if it were a destination wedding far far away that people couldn't afford (not the case), or it was a wedding just for family (nope), or someone couldn't/didn't want to go (nope), but the people invited really wanted to go to the original wedding.  Does she recommend that in her etiquette book?  A party for second tier guests who didn't make the initial cut?  

Didn't like how Tom grabbed LuAnn by the neck when he kissed her at the party.  That was creepy.  

They were going to lose their balls, either way?

You have to cut lulu some slack.

I married late (THANK YOU, JILL ZARIN) otherwise I would have been twice divorced and widowed had I pulled the pin earlier.

-----------------

Manners and etiquette change on a daily basis.

I don't get the rules/etiquette/rules of engagement because everyone wants to have a 'unique' wedding - I have yet to hear about or attend a wedding where the bride or groom choose to do something different/outside the 'rules'..........Hey, it's their life, they may as well live it the way they want?

Edited June 15, 2017 by ElDosEquis

[Teddybear]

Quote

Really? We've been to a couple of them. Enjoyed every minute. Different strokes etc...shrug.

I listed a few situations where I thought it was perfectly normal to have a second party.  What LuAnn did however seemed very rude.  The people not invited clearly knew it was because LuAnn didn't like them that much and didn't want them at the original wedding.  

[zoeysmom]

31 minutes ago, diadochokinesis said:

But making fun of a part of a woman's body (that FYI, is actually common based on how your breast tissue lays) is body shaming. 

Have you listened to Bethenny's many references to Ramona's breasts and face?  Once again she can dish out and others are there to defend her.

[breezy424]

Well, maybe part of the big deal of Lu is making about her marriage is due to all she has had to hear about is negativity about the marriage.  For me, she's a big girl.  Whether it works out or not, that's Lu problem.  So many of these women love to judge but most of them are not in a position to judge given their history and present positions.  I'm looking at you Beth, Ro, Sonja and Carole.  None of which who have a normal stable relationship.  Are any of them truly happy?  I don't think so. 

[ElDosEquis]

You have to give lu a little credit.

First of all?

I wouldn't invite any assholes I had to 'work' with to my wedding.

You have a drunk Sonja, flashing the guests?

Ramona jumping up to chime in at the "does anyone object" line in the vows?

She did take a chance with Do being IN the wedding. "Eyes wanna toast Luahhh

and Tum sho dey can be haaaaappppyyyyyyyyy, Sheers!"

Beth would hold court with carole up her butt and there would have been a blow up over something trivial?

Tins in the background, cougar-ing her way thru the guest list?

Nope, I would have done the same thing.

I mean, was lulu supposed to forget all the shit they talked about her relationship?

I get the feeling that most of us wouldn't put up with that kind of fuckery?

No way, no how.

Edited June 15, 2017 by ElDosEquis
their, there

[diadochokinesis]

Wait, did nobody catch the part where Sonja got mad because Tins and Connor made plans for while Sonja was in Phuket?  She said that Tins will be distracting Connor and that just won't do. 

OMG.  It sounded (to me) like they made plans for one night to go out for drinks or something.  Connor doesn't work 24/7!  He is allowed a night off!  

[NeverLate]

9 hours ago, Teddybear said:

I listed a few situations where I thought it was perfectly normal to have a second party.  What LuAnn did however seemed very rude.  The people not invited clearly knew it was because LuAnn didn't like them that much and didn't want them at the original wedding.  

Didnt seem rude to me. Given who she left of the wedding list, I'd say she was pretty smart!!

Quote

Wait, did nobody catch the part where Sonja got mad because Tins and Connor made plans for while Sonja was in Phuket?  She said that Tins will be distracting Connor and that just won't do. 

She's nuttier this season ,than others. Jealous of Tins as well.

9 hours ago, ElDosEquis said:

You have to give lu a little credit.

First of all?

I wouldn't invite any assholes I had to 'work' with to my wedding.

You have a drunk Sonja, flashing the guests?

Ramona jumping up to chime in at the "does anyone object" line in the vows?

She did take a chance with Do being IN the wedding. "Eyes wanna toast Luahhh

and Tum sho dey can be haaaaappppyyyyyyyyy, Sheers!"

Beth would hold court with carole up her butt and there would have been a blow up over something trivial?

Tins in the background, cougar-ing her way thru the guest list?

Nope, I would have done the same thing.

I mean, was lulu supposed to forget all the shit they talked about her relationship?

I get the feeling that most of us wouldn't put up with that kind of fuckery?

No way, no how 

Great post! :) 

Edited June 15, 2017 by F. M.

[hisbunkie]

Quote

She was such a pill during that entire visit to Chinatown!  Not interested in dim sum, didn't like the plain chocolate ice cream she ordered, what was her problem? 

Carol is just not a foodie. Food doesn't seem to interest her.  She's one of those people who are naturally thin, who eat what is easy and close by.  Wasn't the name of the book she's collaborating with Adam, ' The Reluctant Vagan' ?  Food is just not her thing.  There is no problem.

[BBHN]

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But if he penis is shaped like that, with the hook, I get why he is a ladies man. And I get his ego. Long and curved.

Is that what women like?

Quote

I think though that Tom realized he couldn't get the same chicks he once could and realized he needed to settle down. He was smart that way. He's right. 

Yeah, he found someone willing to settle for...him.

Quote

So, Carole is now hinting that Tom is gay?

I don't think she was hinting, she was asked and was talking about rumors about Tom.

Quote

He's at the Regency!  Or whatever it's called.

Is that what we call him banging another woman?

Quote

I loved Beth's party

I liked it too.

Quote

So, A dick that shoots diamonds isn't man shaming?

How is that man shaming?

Quote

Second receptions are unbelievably common in immigrant communities especially when the wedding occurred in the country the people emigrated from. It happens the other end way too. You get married and have a reception in the US, Canada, or UK and have a traditional ceremony and reception in the country you emigrated from.

Yeah, but none applies to Luann...or her etiquette or situation. Unless I'm missing something, and she and Tom traveled overseas to the wild and exotic foreign land of Pahm Spurings for their wedding? ;)

Quote

LuAnn:  "I have somebody to play with all the time and I love my new playmate."   Um, did LuAnn get a dog or a husband?  Maybe they're one and the same in Tom.  

Will she spank him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper when she catches him screwing another women? Hmmm, with the choking, maybe these two are much kinkier behind closed doors than we thought...

Quote

Well, maybe part of the big deal of Lu is making about her marriage is due to all she has had to hear about is negativity about the marriage

Naaah, she was like that long before, regarding Tom.

Quote

Carol is just not a foodie. Food doesn't seem to interest her.  She's one of those people who are naturally thin, who eat what is easy and close by.  Wasn't the name of the book she's collaborating with Adam, ' The Reluctant Vagan' ?  Food is just not her thing.  There is no problem.

Yeah, I kind of got that impression too.

Edited June 15, 2017 by BBHN

[For Cereals]

I know I comment on hair a lot, but does Frenchie cut his own?

[film noire]

2 hours ago, snarts said:

Yes.  Last week he was incorrigible bachelor groping women all over the east side.  This week he's a closeted gay man using Luann as his beard.

The women have been very clear about what's going on:

Tom married Luann for her money.

Luann married Tom for his Penthouse.

Tom is broke. Luann is rich.

Luann is broke. Tom is rich.

Tom fucks every woman that comes his way.

Luann is a slutty snake of a whore who pretends to be a lady.

Luann is not a lady, she is a man. She is LuMan. 

Tom is the lady. Because he is gay.  

He is the only kind of the gay Carole is aware of: Norman Bates gay, with a dash of Paul Lynde and Charles Nelson Reilly making out backstage at Hollywood Squares. Because all gay men must kiss each other, especially when on a game show. The bright colors excite them. Carole knows this. Also, in private, they wear marabou trimmed kit'en heels and talk in high mincing voices while sloshing martinis everywhere. Sometimes, there is opera.  Poor gay Tom will have to lis'en to LuMan's club music instead. Elegance is learned, my friend. These are the sacrifices he had to make. Sacrifices to live like a closeted gay man in 1920 as seen in the fever dream of Carole Radiziwill,  world sophisticate and sexual adventurer. And this is how TomGay -- after two failed engagements and with only a nickle in his pocket  (to order gay dim sum) married LuMan, so she could fuck him with a strap-on.  Carole knows all this. She has even worn a strap-on herself. On her head, while she rode a giant tricycle through a field of daisies. And this year she has eaten the dim sum of the gay people, and so now there will be a letter just for her: QUILTBAG C. 

 

(by next week, he'll be Questioning.)

Edited June 15, 2017 by film noire

[ElDosEquis]

3 minutes ago, film noire said:

The women have been very clear about what's going on:

Tom married Luann for her money.

Luann married Tom for his Penthouse.

Tom is broke. Luann is rich.

Luann is broke. Tom is rich.

Tom fucks every woman that comes his way.

Luann is a slutty snake of a whore who pretends to be a lady.

Luann is not a lady, she is a man. She is LuMan. 

Tom is the lady. Because he is gay.  

He is the only kind of the gay Carole is aware of: Norman Bates gay, with a dash of Paul Lynde and Charles Nelson Reilly making out backstage at Hollywood Squares. Because all gay men must kiss each other, especially when on a game show. The bright colored lights excite them. Also, in private, they wear maribou trimmed kit'en heels and talk in high mincing voices while sloshing martinis everywhere. Sometimes, there is opera.  Poor gay Tom will have to lis'en to LuMan's club music instead. Elegance is learned, my friend. These are the sacrifices he had to make. Sacrifices to live like a closeted gay man in 1920 as seen in the fever dream of Carole Radiziwill,  world sophisticate and sexual adventurer. And this is how TomGay -- after two failed engagements and with only a nickle in his pocket  (to order gay dim sum) married LuMan, so she could fuck him with a strap-on.  Carole knows all this. She has even worn a strap-on herself. On her head, while she rode a giant tricycle through a field of daisies. And this year she has eaten the dim sum of the gay people, and so now there will be a letter just for her: QUILTBAG C. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Next week he'll be Questioning 

And while she pedals furiously, she sings in a lilting voice, "look at me, I am a UNICORN!"

[BBHN]

Quote

Poor gay Tom will have to lis'en to LuMan's club music instead

Not even poor gay Tom deserves that...

[film noire]

10 minutes ago, ElDosEquis said:

And while she pedals furiously, she sings in a lilting voice, "look at me, I am a UNICORN!"

Ha! (In her voice that is so much more "feminine" than LuMan's.) 

What a couple of backward assholes Bethenny and Carole are -- two wannabe sophisticates tittering over strap-ons -- fucking rubes.

Edited June 15, 2017 by film noire

[beesknees]

I, for one, do not have a problem with a dick shooting out diamonds.  I just want to go on record for saying that.  (I'll see myself out now, thank you)

[BBHN]

Quote

What a couple of backward assholes Bethenny and Carole are -- two wannabe sophisticates tittering over strap-ons -- fucking rubes.

I always thought Luann was the top in her relationship with Tom.

[ElDosEquis]

5 minutes ago, beesknees said:

I, for one, do not have a problem with a dick shooting out diamonds.  I just want to go on record for saying that.  (I'll see myself out now, thank you)

Actually, that is pretty funny.

It's like trying to pass a kidney stone?

Would it be out of line if I said that beff's bagina is someplace you would find diamonds?

Dark, dank and dangerous to men inside?

(that is NOT body shaming, think of it in OSHA terms? You need to inform anyone in the area of the dangers inside?)

[ciaoformeow]

3 hours ago, Martinigirl said:

...and understand  the French language.  LOL! Did you see his face when Lu spoke French to him? LMAO!

I like the French guy. He was cute. Not too young (39) and seems to be the only person who can tell Sonja a thing or two about her house and seems to be getting it in order *GASP* 

He seemed genuine, and from my limited experience with French folks (work sent me to Paris every quarter to work with French team), there wasn't anything that was giving me the red flag of being a non-french fraud. But I'm also not an expert and fraud flagging, so there's that. LOL

Of course he looked shocked at Luanne when she spoke French - everyone who speaks it says her accent is horrible and her french is really bad. :D 

 

Quote

Frenchie seems to be out of central casting. And if he is "real", where was he living before he moved in with Sonja? I've seen homeless people (and I am not in the least dissing homeless people) with more possessions than his which barely filled the corner of Sonja's bedroom. He seems more in need of a place to stay than Tins did. 

She said to Tinsley that  she was making room for just a few of his things that he wanted to keep there. She also said he lives in Paris.  She only made it sound like more of a big deal at the party - probably because she was so happy to finally have something to brag about

Edited June 15, 2017 by lilsadone

[ElDosEquis]

17 minutes ago, film noire said:

Ha! (In her voice that is so much more "feminine" than LuMan's.) 

What a couple of backward assholes Bethenny and Carole are -- two wannabe sophisticates tittering over strap-ons -- fucking rubes.

One has never had Dim Sum and the other has never had manners?

Instead of doing a 'real estate' show, beffy should team up with carole and take her around town and show her the sights.

Teach her how to ride a bike, so she doesn't have to ride on the handlebars.

Get her a book of names, so she can retire the name "Baby".

Teach carole that the M&Ms that are W&Ws are still good.

Carole may not want to have her teach her how to use chopsticks. Beffy has a thing about threatening to stab you in the eyes with them.......

Edited June 15, 2017 by ElDosEquis

[swankie]

4 hours ago, chick binewski said:

Luann. Charles Manson wouldn't gift his daughter with Tom. WAKE UP.

The fact that he wasn't even wearing his wedding ring at their party for the women not invited to the wedding spoke volumes to me.  I have a feeling he won't be wearing it a lot.  smdh

[Rahul]

4 hours ago, Pickles said:

Wow, Carole is a major sourpuss in Chinatown.

So, Carole is now hinting that Tom is gay?

 

The more I see of Tom, the more I concur with Carole's intimations. I don't think he's straight.

Bethenny was on fire tonight. She had some pretty great zingers that had me chortle several times.